Evening Star Newspaper, December 26, 1936, Page 20

B—8 THE EVENING STAR, WASHINGTON, D. C., SATURDAY, DECEMBER 26, 1936. — CHILDREN MUST BE MADE TO EXPRESS GRATITUDE < Writing “Thank-You” Letters Is Important As Chargqter Builder Youngsters Should Be Taught That Appre- ciation Must Not Be In- articulate. BY BETSY NE of the most difficult jobs in to bring up her children in the O Christmas gifts. CASWELL. the world for the mother who wishes way that they should go is the annual battle to make them promptly and properly acknowledge their Receiving the presents is a joy—but writing letters about them is a horror, appears to be the viewpoint of the younger generation on the subject. But it is a task that must be done. take the merest gift trifle for granted, < for a charming expression of ap- § preciation and gratitude is one of the finest qual- jties that one may have. It is all very well to say, *Oh, I don’t know how to say what 1 feel—she knows 1 like the present, and how!” Maybe “she” does. But it won't hurt a bit to put that feeling into words 1n a little note of thanks. Older people, more than ever, be- cause there is less of it these days, | appreciate courtesy and consideration in a child. When they have taken the trouble to select, purchase and deliver a token of their affection to brighten | the youngster's Christmas, it is cer- tainly not too much to expect him to | do his part by a very cecided “thank- 0 mM:ny mothers write these notes for the children themselves, because, in the long run, it is a lot easier than | battling the young one who wants to play with his gift instead of writing | about it. But this is one of the times | when the line of least resistance is definitely bad, in that the effects of such submission will be felt in the | child's character forever. * ok x x XPLAIN in the first place to your offspring that there is one main | fact to remember—if you get pres- ents you have to say “thank _vou"—i either personally, taking time to do it | properly, or by note. Even if the pres- | ent is delivered direct from donor to child, in the excitement of opening | it thanks are apt to be forgotten or hurriedly mumbled, and it is only right that after a day or so0 of real pleasure in the object, a letter should be dis- patched with a word of gratitude. Don't try to make the children write too many notes in one day. Portion them out—writing the ones first that ! Betsy Caswell. | If the child really likes his gift he should be encouraged, to put his feel- Children should never be allowed to have the farthest distance to go. Two or three at a time are plenty. In that way each letter will be bright and in- dividual and the bored writer will not descend to such unnerving trivia as “It was just what I wanted,” “How did you guess that was just what I wanted,” “I just wanted to thank you for the beautiful present, it was so nice of you to send it to me, thank you again, wishing you a happy New Year,” etc. * ok %k NSIST that the letters be carefully written and worded spontaneously. ing into words. If he doesn’t like it (and such awful situations do occur) then the matter must be tactfully handled and the youngster initiated into the gentle art of writing an ade- quate acknowledgment without saying anything! He needn’t dwell too much on the object itself—he can always stress the thought and trouble which went into its purchase and he can remark on the general jollity of his Christmas and how lucky he feels himself to be. Often making copies will save tears, note paper and ink spots. It may add to the length of the time taken away from the playthings. but it certainly insures better results. For very young writers it is well to rule the final note paper lightly in pencil. The marks | may be erased before the sheet is slipped into the envelope. If you can, set aside one hour each day until all the “thank-you” notes are written and mailed. The child won't like it, an: neither will you, but it will do him a lot of good and, incidentally, give your patience and self-control a workout. Together you and your youngster will be tying closer the bonds of friendship with all those who have taken the trouble to ex- press their affection for you and for him—and surely ‘friendship is one of the greatest insurances for a success- ful life that there can be! Don't deny your youngster that in- surance! Don't let him grow up to be an inarticulate grabber! Cla_ssip Spfll:t ‘(_]o'at Well-Cut Three-Button Model Is Com- fortable and Roomy. BY BARBARA BELL. ] HE swagger coat is in to stay, and a good thing it is for every woman who likes the easy com- fort of this classic sports coat! fToday’s model brings all the good fea- tures together: Raglan sleeves ending in a snug wrist fit. inset pockets and a big floppy collar that can be turned up for warmth. And the best thing is that there's nothing under the sun as easy to sew as a raglan-sleeved swag- ger coat. You'll want it for early Spring in a nice nubby tweed, or in a bright-hued | novelty woolen. Barbara Bell pattern No. 1963-B is | available for sizes 14, 16, 18, 20, 40, 42 and 44. Corresponding bust measure- ments 32, 34, 36, 38, 40. 42 and 44.! Bize 16 (34) requires just 3 yards 54- Inch material and 3% yards, 39 mcnul wide, for the lining. 1963-D Send 15 cents for the Barbara Bell tive, practical and becoming clothes, selecting designs from the Barbara Bell well-planned, easy-to-make pat- terns. BARBARA BELL, Washington Star. Inclose 25 cents in coins for pattern No. 1963-B. Size....... L2 S —— LUT (- R ——— (Wrap coins securely in paper.) | mirror. | astonishment. | | his chest and thrust out his chin. He | the fellows are so busy they can't Pattern Book. Make yourself attrace From an Age When Elaboration Was the Keynote Vlittle h_:is_e dress on the Help Youth Struggling +With Self Adolescents Not Al- |ways Capable of Solv- ing Own Problems. BY ANGELO PATRIL ‘HUGO was 15 yvears old. There had been trouble at home, and he had made himself very disagree- able about it. He was sulky, bad- mannered, deliberately mean at times. In despair his mother sent him to a good boys’ school. “Put him in the tower room for a while until we see how he gets along with the other fellows,” said the head. The tower room was down the hall at the turn of the stairs, just around the corner from the rooms of the other boys. One could feel apart there and yet close by, too. | Hugo soon showed his bad side. | He flung himself about the school in angry defiance of manners and | | customs. He sneered at his school- mates, and when the masters remon- | strated with him told them in no | gentle words how he felt about them. | They had held a conference about him and had about decided to wire | his mother to come and get him. The mathematics teacher had his room in the tower, too, one flight up. | He was coming down the padded | stairs, and at the turn, looked dovm.1 right into the room where Hugo was | standing, his door wide open, absorbed | in his vision of himself in the big The master stood fixed in Hugo, a big, powerful, not too handsome, boy, posed before the mir- | ror. He shook himself as though ill | pleased with what he saw. He lifted lifted one foot and planted it with an air on the chair beside him, the head- | master’s very own trick. Next he tried smiling. Once in an attempt to get just the right smile he molded | his face with his hands. Then he | fought a battle with an' adversary, | always watching in the mirror to see | if the expression was ferocious enough. | In triumph he shook hands grace- | fully with his defeated enemy. Now he posed as a beau ideal. He prac- ticed graceful gestures and motions, he held out his hands, shook hands, smiled and smiled. Now he whispered coyly, coaxingly. Now he threatened. Now he gave one last pitiful look into the mirror and collapsed on his bed in a flood of tears. He had done his best to vision him- self as he longed to be. He had no hope of ever being that boy. He must take up again his mask of temper. snobbery and ill will. And he cried at the thought. ! The master came to life, slipped back upstairs, waited a minute and then descended, whistling, “The Girl 1 Left Behind Me,” loudly and with all the merriment he could put in it. He heard Hugo's door close and passed | it still whistling. He stopped at the headmaster’s door and peeked in.| “Don't do anything about Hugo for a while. I think we can get hold of him. Give us a few days.” After a time he went back and knocked on the closed door. “Hullo. Come on out with me, will you? All even see me and I'm 5o all-tired lone- | some I don't know what to do. Let’s | {go watch the practice down in the village.” Doubting. Hugo went. Carefully, steadily, the teacher | worked to make the lad’s vision of himself come true. Worked to give {him a chance to be a leader, a suc- | cessful student, a successful all- around boy, winning favor with his mates, and the girls and the masters. He gave the lonely, *bewildered child a glimpse of the road that led to realization of his vision of himself as he most wanted to be. Maybe you could, if you watched, see in some failing adolescent the vision of the boy as he would like to be. And maybe you could help him attain it. Most boys have one hidden down deep. (Copyright, 1906.) right! Dorothy EAR MISS DIX—I have a son who is big, strong and handsome; smart, a college graduate, who holds a fine teaching position. He earned his ed- ucation himself and his clothes after he was 20. He is proud of his connec- | tions, his educated and influential friends and likes to bring them home | | to meet his family. But he breaks my | heart by saying now to me, his | mother, that he owes me no obligation | and brazenly asks: “What did you ever do for me?” A MOTHER. Answer: That is a hard question for you to answer because if any mother made a list of the things she has done for her child not all the ledgers in the world would hold it. It would show an indebtedness so great that he could not | hope to pay it off in a dozen lifetimes. | * % % ¥ JHEN your son asks you what you have done for him you might say to him: “I went down into the val- ley of the shadow of death and en- dured the agony that is the symbol of supreme suffering to bring you into the world. Perhaps you may say that the gift of life is no great gift, but such as it 1s, it is the one thing that you hold dearest and with which you would not part for any price that might be offered you. You can say to him: “I gave you health and strength, a sound mind Christmas BY MARY ALLEN HOOD. OW that the excitement of Christmas day is over, it’s time to overhaul Pups’ and Bingo's Christmas presents. That brightly-painted ball won't do at all. It's covered with varnish. One can tell by looking at it. Give it to some one who doesn’t carry his toys around in his mouth. Those little balls that came in his stocking are a mistake, too. Pups has a pretty good-sized mouth. It's been felt by | everything in the house at one time or another. He needs a man-sized | ball, one too large for him to swallow, ‘The worst part of a canine’s chew- ing up Junior's wooden horses is not Junior's tragic outlook on the situa- tion. It's the danger Pups runs into when he accomplishes the deed. The splinters stick in his teeth, lodge in his throat and go farther. Most families eat New Year, when they swear off. Pups expects to do the same. He sits up on his hind legs and barks, puts his head on one side, wiggles his nose and licks his chops in joyous anticipation. If his efforts aren’t repaid he gets a hurt look that can't be healed. It Dix Says in a sound body, and that is better for you than if I had been able to give you a million dollars. It is be-! cause of this inheritance I gave you that you have been able to stand on| your own feet and make your own way in the world, and that will give you the power to push on to what- ever goal to which you aspire. * ¥ Xk % 1 GAVE you a gift whose worth you will never know until you| are an old man and look back upon {the experiences you have been | through and the men you have seen !who failed because they lacked a | | mother’s training. I bred in you | | courage from your very cradle. I |a child. I taught you to stick to your job and finish it. I taught you to speak the truth and deal honestly. I taught you the principles that make | character. I lit the fires of ambition {in your soul and made you fesl that | you could accomplish anything you | aspired to if only vou worked hard | | enough. Whatever you are you will | owe to me.” You might say to him: “I gave you a service that no money can buy. | When you were a babe I waiched | over you without ceasing and minis- tered to your every n (Copyright, 1936,) Postscript takes more strength of mind than the average person possesses to deny him. Sometimes the question is simplified as to whether the boss shall eat candy with Pups or not eat any at all, since the canine shouldn't. Whatever the method, Pups and Bingo must not eat candy. Their digestive systems just aren’t equipped to handle the situation. A word about that little Junior.” When Santa Claus left him, he expected the little fellow to have first-class care. Don't let the whole family maul him about. Too much handling is bad. The person he chooses for his boss should show him his bed and establish friendly rela- tions by offering a little raw ham- burger or warm milk. He must have a few square feet of personal property. From this point of vantage he can gaze at the world. Don't plan to give him away because he howled last night. He'll likely stage a repeat per- formance tonight. Feed him before he goes to bed. Then shut him up in his box, but be very sure that he's warm and comfortable. There may not be any safety pins to worry over, but he must be warm and snug. He'll stop howling when he gets use to things. “Pups, | These pictures, taken from Peterson’s Magazine for 1870, are entirely indicative of the craze for over-exaggeration in appearance and dress. The complicated coiffures called for a wealth of false hair, and a great deal of time. And imagine washing th e dishes or running down to the corner market in the —Star Staff Photo. Courtesies, Invitations and Customs Meeting Friend at Boat—Paying “Guests.” BY EMILY POST. DEAR MRS. POST: I am going to meet & friend who is returning from abroad. My being at the boat will be a surprise to her, as I only just learned that no one was to be | taught you self-control when you were | there. I have really very little money | at the moment, which she does not | know. All this is a prelude to asking | whether, if we lunch in town before | going home to the suburbs, I am safe | in taking it for granted that she will expect to pay her own check. Answer—It seems to me that if you asked, “Do you want to go straight ! home or could we lunch somewhere?” | there would be a chance that she might interpret your question as an invitation to lunch with you. So, under the circumstances, it would probably be safer to say frankly, “Are you going to lunch in town; if you are, will you make it an inexpensive place so I can go with you?” : * %k ¥ ¥ D R MRS. POST: | ng guest” in a family of refine ment. My position at the table is at | the host’s right. They have only one maid and consequently most of the carving is done at the table by the | host, and plates are usually passed up | the table from one to the other. The host always passes the first plate to me | and I never know whether I am sup- | posed to keep it or pass it. I feel that perhaps I'm being discourteous in not keeping it. Answer—If he simply hands the first plate to you, you should pass it on up the table because you are not really a guest but living in the family. On the other hand, if he asks you, “Do you like light meat or dark?” or in any way serves you in answer to the question he puts to you, you keep the plate and pass the next one. * x % % DEAR MRS. POST: It is my per- sonal opinion that inasmuch as the cream sauce with which certain vegetables are served is just as good as the vegetables themselves, it is sensible to eat this with a spoon. How- ever, my wife disagrees with me and says that & spoon is never used to eat vegetables. I'm sure you of all people would least like to know the silly claims my wife makes in the name of etiquette. Answer—I am afraid you will have to do without a spoon for your vege- tables, unless you don’t mind a nursery rating in table manners. Seriously, if you choose to use a spoon in your own house, you have every right to do so even though, according to the rules of etiquette, it is not correct. (Copyright, 1936.) Iam a “pay- My Neighbor Says: A few drops of ammonia put into each quart of water, with which the plants are watered, will improve the color of the foilage and increase the growth. To clean windows in freezing weather moisten a soft cloth with kerosene instead of water. A good potato should be firm and crisp when cut, and a thin section, when held between the eye and light, should show a distribution of starch through the whole potato. If the flavor of curry is liked add a level teaspoon of curry powder to the flour for thicken- ing some time when you are making chicken or veal fricassee. Add coconut to apples to be baked and you will have & “lit- tle different” flavor. Remember to add lemon juice to all baked fruits and the flavor will be improved. (Copyright, 1936.) Progress of Cosmetics Never Seriously Delayed Even in Victorian Era In Some Form or Other, Women Have Al- ways Managed to Enhance Their Natural Beauty. BY GAEL RENFREW, 18 the last ‘The recipe book of a lady of & swift travel—less than 20 years—down the corridors of time from reign of pleasure-loving Charles to that of domesticated Anne, the of the Royal Stuart sovereigns. the reign of Queen Anne, is another of those quaint—and unconsciously social—treatises, of which the Library of Congress has a reprint. that have grown hoary in the course of centuries. Only this horrifying contribution by a certain Mrs. Voster, for “the snall (snail) eye water” seems new: “Take lying house snalls, wash ym very clean & just bruse ym shells & all. Put ym into a cold still and lay & laying of snalls & another of Celan- dine. Do so till ye still is full then still it wt. a coole fire. This water is good for strenghening ye eyes used night & morning, but can be done no time as well as May.” ‘We'd rather have weak eyes, thanks! After Anne, of course, came the German Georges, and it is more than | passing strange that while mutterings of revolution were being heard in his | majesty’s American colonies the moth- er country was in the throes of a cos- metic row! year on the Western fringes of the Atlantic—this amazing measure was introduced into the British House of Commons: “That all women, of whatever rank, profession or degree, whether maids or widows, that shall from and after such act, impose upon, seduce .and betray into matrimony any of his majesty’s subjects by the scents, paints, cosmetic washes, artificial teeth, false hair, Spanish wool (a wool impreg- nated with carmine used to color the shoes and bolstered hips, shall incur the penalty of the law now in force against witcheraft and like misde- meanors, and that the marriage upon conviction shall be null and void.” * k *x *x LIKE the milder proposal put for- ward by the Puritan government but its mere introduction marks the use of cosmetics as an aceepted social problem. This pioneer eighteenth cen- tury legislation differed in purpose from that of our own times, when the | goal has been to make the world safe | for doers-up rather than to protect mere males from the machinations of the other sex. However, | closing years of the century that was | to witness the end of an era, in the | severance of Great Britain and her North American colonies, the English- speaking peoples on both sides of the Atlantic had weightier matters to set- tle than women's frivolities. By 1800 a new nation had got itself established in the New World, and as we go swiftly forward through time and space again we find that “The | Modern Family Recipe Book” had | | been published in Philadelphia in 1828. | Its many recipes for cosmetics are| | mainly repetitions of those found in | earlier volumes and popularized centuries of usage—lip salves, cold , Spanish ladies’ % ¢ | Psychology underlying the author's e e o pe. milk of | “Hints on Deportment and Condition roses lotion, coral tooth powder, dyes and the inevitable “something” to in- crease the growth of hair. Like its predecessors, this book gives only a section to cosmetics, aiming to present, | a8 its subtitle indicates, “Valuable re- | ceipts arranged under their respective headings connected with the art of social and domestic life.” The “mis- cellaneous” section is good for hun- dreds of laughs. It funs full gamut from “the making of a knife board” | to “telling how to judge the weather!” ] € x ¥ % ;JUST a hundred years ago—in 1837 | —a teen-age girl came to the | throne of Great Britain and her still 8 great colonial empire—even if it no | longer contained the stretch of Atlan- | tic seaboard that sweeps from Maine | to Georgia. The 18-year old Queen | did not know that she was introduc- | ing an era which was to extend for the | next 63 years, taking its place in his- | tory as the Victorian age and directing | both thought and fashion into chan- nels of so-called “naturalness” that became highly artificial. Into the limbo of forgotten things went the painted and powdered lady, taking rouge pot, powder and patches with her.. Or so it seems. Yet the tongue is ever in the cheek of anyone who studies the story of clvulzat!un,} Victorian era. Its slowness was matched 6nly by its consistency. By the middle of the century skin lotions could be bought from the family drug- gist who carried on his shelves a small but reliable stock of French and English toilet preparations. “No nice girl” had the nerve to come in and ask for them, but they were there, ready for coming changes. In 1865 Henry Tetlow put the face powder industry on the road to fabu- lous wealth by perfecting a formula which had oxide of zinc as its base in place of bismuth. Powder no longer *“downy look” began to use this manu- factured article in preference to the old-established home substitutes like chalk and meal. Rouge was still be- yond the pale of polite practice, but it, too, could be bought from the druggist, who put up his own product, using carmine powder or red chalk. Cold cream, of course, the acknowl- edged ancestor of all the modern cosmetic clan, was purchasable. Its formula is credited to the great Phy- sician Galen (130-201 AD. whose ten books on local remedies, based in turn on the works of Crito, virtually cover the entire field of modern cos- metics. Hair bleaching, dyeing, tint- ing and greasing, wrinkle removal, skin purification, freckle and double- chin removers, and deodorants, were all proposed by Crito who was Galen's source of information. * ok ¥ ¥ ITH cosmetic interest always growing, although on the quiet, as the Victorian age continued, it is not surprising to find Harper's Bazaar | devoting prominent space, in its No- vember 23, 1867 issue, to a mysteri- ous French import known as “Etui de Flore.” These “Flora’s Caskets” con- tained sharpened crayons,—“black, as of old, for the eyebrows, red for the cheeks and blue for the veins—“for painting of ladies’ fancy portraits by- themselves,” the informant adds. Such innuendo was the accepted speech in an age which went a long way round rather than call a spade a spade. Ordinary conversation was In 1770—an ominious | skin), iron stays, hoops, high-heeled | in 1650, this bill never passed into law, | in these | by | Published in 1711, its lotions, salves, creams and pomades are reminiscent of formulas as overlarded with useless language as the women were over-dressed and furniture over-stuffed. Convention— | itself & word for sham—was the order of the day. So the writer in Harper's reluctantly compelled to acknowledge the popularity of Flora's Caskets, takes refuge in sarcasm: “Our dames have no occasion, of course,” he continues, “with their natural stock of charms to avail themselves of these resources of art . .. (yet) it is puzzling to con- jecture what these French boxes of pigment are used' for in the United States where there is said to be a large sale for them.” Some seven years later, in 1875, Harper's published a series of Hints for the Toilet, under the intriguing title, “The Ugly Girl Papers.” As one of the initial attempts to divorce public opinion from the axiom of the age that ability did not coincide with beauty in a woman, these papers | have a prime social value. As the ede itor points out, “The motto ‘No excel~ lence without great labor’ is as true about personal improvement as any- thing else. Celebrated beauties have all used these arts which must be the earliest of all, since we have no rec- ord of their first teaching, the arts of the toilette.” Having got this confession off its chest, the volume carefully warns that “both from, principle and preference (it) discountenances paint and pow- der, but if (a woman) must resort to artificial beauty let her be artistic about it and not lay on paint as one would furniture polish.” No one can cavil at this advice. Ovid had said the self-same thing, “Hide the tricks of your beautifying arts.” Telling how the famous beauties of history had guarded their heritage | by the use of softening creams and preservative lotions, the papers also mention that “Her Majesty the Queen of England uses nothing but distilled water for her toilet.” * ok ok % PSYCHOLOGY. then unknown as a sclence, was nevertheless begin- | ning to leaven the hard lump of so- cial thinking. “To remain charming,” says the scribe in Harper's, “keep hold on love and faith in romance. Emo- tion has a livelier power than the sun has over the blood. Sunshine, music, work and sleep are great medicines for women. The body at best is the perfect expression of the soul.” Even in stern Scottish Edinburgh | Henry Southgate, in 1877, published | an important volume entitled “Things | & Lady Would Like to Know.” It is not so much the time-worn recipes | for hand lotions, perfumes, powders, | cream and salves that attract the ate | tention of today’s thinkers, as the Like a strong undercurrent in the | steady stream of social life, cosmetic | progress went on all through the rigid | turned dark after a few hours’ use, | d women lured by promises of the | |in Life.” “Among the minor virtues | which tend to cement the bond of | conjugal affection,” he says, “the | Christian female must not overlook | that of personal neatness and self | respect. . . . There is a greater con- | nection between mental and outward | purity than some are aware of.” The | idea goes back to Plato, but a self~ satisfied century was just beginning to ponder its truth. That women were willing to suffer in this new search for beauty is startingly proved by a Mrs. Sarah | Jane Pierce, who published “Homely | Girls” in 1890. “Flipping soapsuds | into the eyes, will give them a bright- ness for a time,” she explains, “but it is rather painful.”—“Well, I'll say so!" exclaims the indignant modern. “Spanish ladies,” continues the in- formative Mrs. Pierce, “often squeeze the juice of the ripened sweet orange into the eyes to make them sparkle. It is not so painful as lemon juice."— Another chorus from today’s smart beauties: “I should hope not!” (Ed. Note: Thig is the seventh in a series of articles on the his- tory of cosmetics. The nert will appear shortly on this page.) IP ONLY you could say to Cousin Mehitable, when she calls after Christmas, “It was sweet of you, old dear, to think of us, but we really can't use the lamp. Wouldn't you like to have it back?"” But that wouldn't be nice. Yet the horrible fact remains that there are neckties and scarves and lampshades which come your way at Christmas time which you wish you had never seen. And for these, dear readers, you must say “thank you" whether you | like it or not. Sometimes you can arrange things 80 that for the first call from each rel- ative after Christmas you can have his or her gift out on display. This takes scheming and sometimes a bit of duplicity. But if you like to make people feel good, it's quite worth the effort. If that is impossible, the next best thing is to catch the givers before they catch you. Call them up, or write them right off the bat. Theyll be swept off their feet by your promptis tude and that should carry you through until next Christmas. JEAN.