Evening Star Newspaper, June 4, 1898, Page 18

ee THE EVENING STAR, SATURDAY, JUNE 4, 1898-24 PAGES. MEETING CUS AGATHA, } (Copyright 1898, Th sr another good-bye her impressively She put up her fragile finger and caught You w ake a mess of it, dear boy? You'll keep your wh on cousin Agatha? Keep Agatha— ‘ a’ over and t you're going to 1 Agatha—” w! O, Pom, shivers—if I aes little like like me i the big man *t wear glasses most every- : »w—and has light hair 1 I should know , say your lesson arb mixed, may thins: you certain through?” I didn’t, little womar He so! seast it! Why did I hav t when it ca om Tose it? O. di Pettir street with usin Ag not drag ortic mind on m-m-m—and y-five in the shi side upj—m-m-1n himself, never seen ! He didn't . why by woman tack on wrote! in his ex- man besi with pity eat pain, sir?” he inquired softly I vain? I'm in the last extremities. out of sh he prof- oft with me. He nim. is so cu baby with bring pwn it sir? crooned gain ded » bri sir. 1 bad Agatha’s it if vhs panic ome. He And he usin a in Heartsease ny baby the world. But ve imagined it—well, it now but to accept baby. € to three to—go! just steaming into of disap- of Crowd: the bmen we shouting with hoarse persistence and bag Kage was lly maltreated. Pre of the lad! near the entran r Cousin Agatha «: have to go a in posite one—they « not escape him! He feit a wild im to accost all the women as they a with Are you Cousin Agatha? or Fortune favered him, for in stream « ined Hl the stea: weary women f door past him there s. an © of those was in ebony. The oth of Course in Agatha’s bab: muttered Prof. Fe setting his teeth a less women with a stifled Xt fortifying himself with the of little Hear ite I a& oft tally—“didn r did Cous “smiled.” To be . tired smile that, t enough, was entirely for the a smi a smile, and 1 to identify Cousin Agatha Woman sank down on a seat r the door, and proceeded to rearrange the baby, whose sviled little clothes were in a tum The waiting to reinforce his courage, her croo to it in the fas rs have—“There, there, it again, yes it ! Mother will drive away all the ugly kles—so."” baby red appreciatively. The pink, creased face swayed, and wrig- Gled into its bennet. “Let the baby,” the professor said, plurgirg in without foolish waste of ceremony. the 4 o'clock The weary little mother looked up at the towering bulk of the big, strange man, With a gasp of meek astonishment. He ng at the baby—he had him in Land of mercy! But his eyes honest znd kind. Tem?” she stammered, eager- the resolute, martyr-like Ss of resemblance to of “Cordelia’s husband.” “She d meet us at the depot. certainly,” assented the big There's just time to catch ar up.” face her eaid b “Cer! man thinking Cousin Agatha a iittle familiar with pet names. No one but Hieartseare called him Pom—he did not “notice the charged consonant. But what fiid it matter? It was the baby that mat- fered. and the baby was adjusting himself 20 the bread shoulder and crowing like a young bantam. His grimy little fists were ommeling the professor's cheekbones with Smpartial thumps. The baby was quiet at heme! “Here she goes! Your bag, ma‘am— i ean take it in my other then, we'll have to step a bit i were presently crossing the great room and making excellent head- Way toward the 4 o'clock car up. Prof. Pomeroy Pettingill Lee was conscious of MeClure Co.) mI | feeling a modest degree of pride handiness, with the crumpled, squirming littie budget on is arm—it ‘as easy enough, if you shut your eyes and plung- ed in. How proud Heartsease would be! jin his mind's eye he saw her pale little | tace Hehting approvingly, and in his | mind's ear Heartsease was saying, “Splen- | did, Pom! You're doing it like a hero!’ Poor little Heartsease, in his mind’s eye the w nine in her face yt in always at the sight of little ren—and in the “dear boy's” arms | in Agatha’s baby plunged wildly | aught with a neat trick that ifresented itself for the emergency out of j the mists of old base ball days. The dang- | Ss over for that time. Julius Caesar, H babie hav the St. Vitus dance, was it a afttict monopolized by Cousin Agatha’s baby? How often did the fits com on? Would there be time to get to the car before the next one? A group of the professor's students look- ed up in undisguised a m: s th little pree wept by them, and one of them collapsed weakly into the arms of the others. Ho ! Save me!” he gasped. “The | old chap’s picked up somebody's kid in an | absent-minded fit and is making off with | down the long station the ry her made a discovery that fill. ed her with dismay. ‘Land of mercy, I've i | | | | HE STRUGGLED ACROSS AND DROPPED THE you can't lift it. I'll carry it in. I've got to face it out, and the Lord help me!” “Pomeroy Pettingill Lee, you stand stock still where you are. Don't move. Now tell me everything—whisper i She hovered weakly between him and the door. The shrill Httle voice within kept on inststently and helped them out. The professor deposited the drowsy baby carefully on the floor and laid his watch on top of it with propitiatory intent. Then he faced the little woman boldly. didn’t mean to run away with it. T thougat she was there, too—hoper-may-die if I didn’t think so, little woman! But the little chap is safe enough. I took care of him. Now, let me present arms and get it over with. I'd rather face the cannon’s mouth.” “But Pom—O, Pomeroy Pettingill Lee— but she’s got it now, this minute. Of course, she’s got it!” i ot what?” thundered the professor, re- of caution. baby. Cousin Agatha’s got the Oh, where did you get this one? What have you done?” She was down on the floor beside the soiled, tumbled baby, peering into its little puckered face and fingering the tiny moist hands. It was a baby, anyhow, however it got there. Cousin Agatha’s got the baby?—this isn’t cousin Agatha’s baby?” mumbled the pro- fessor stupidly. ‘Then,”” reviving sudden- ly, “hers was the black one. There wasn’t any other white baby but this. I guess I can count two! She had this one when I spoke to her— “Oh, Pom, wait—do wait! You've got it all mixed up. You didn’t speak to her— you spoke to somebody else. Cousin Agatha waited and waited for you and then she took the hack up. Now, wait, let me think Heartsease rocked herself back and forth in a wild attempt to unwind the tangle. Suddenly she stepped and gazed up at the looming figure sterniy. . “Which way did me, Pom—the train? it come from ¢! est?” came from the e: stammered the professor, getting a mental view of the puffing train into fecus. His hair rose in anguish—he hadn't thought of that before. “And cousin Agatha’s train came from voice of Heartsease was ars, like the voice of fate. left my little handbag, cried, but in |the din the professor did not hear. “I must have left it right where I was sit- Ung—I'li hurry back—it's got the baby’s best t in it. I won't be gone more'n | And the ¢ wallowed up corner, out- car was starting Cousin Agatha’s sttle fi nre », the or and fled it wildly. mr shouted ngers twitchi stood asi Gl hi ‘Hurry the conductor, Z on the rope for Cousin followed the the crossly ‘The Agatha stout fessor to enter, a aisle, un- thing wn perous € tled hin baby an air eHied oddly ». He got nd jackknife for playthings knife absently and extending t, with a slight. rd the small grasping 1 iropped to the floor baby’s lif. saved. the and motion again. Pomero: hat it was rking into before real and erse a little with . certainly—what The baby had > immediate danger of asleep ani ; he might look away another fit w j safely for a mom: it's very 1 tured cheerful “It's raining.” snapped the stout lady be- him, tilting her i all that was ‘ Agatha! Where w sin He searched the car with eager eye he even looked ott on the platform body was Cousin Agatha. And Cousin nt weather,” he ven- in N The Little Man Was Moved With Pity. his arm! He had left Cousin Agatha’ baby’s mother behind—shades of mighty | Caesar! A wild desire to raise the window and drop the baby out seized him—another viid idea of rushing back to the station surged with kindred impulses through his brain. A cold perspiration broke out all over him. Wait—he must reflect. He must be cool. What would Heartsease advise, the poor little woman? Would she ever trust him again? “Well, I'm in for it,” groaned his thoughts. “I've got to see it through—the baby, anyhow.” The little flushed, sleep- ing face appealed to him, and not in vain. “Ill get him landed and’ then I'll set the town crier on Cousin Agatha. We'll find her between and betwixt us. When she’s landed I'll sail for Europe! T'll get ‘em to send me on a scientific expedition to Africa —the north pole—anywhere.”” A little later he “landed” Cousin Aga- tha’s baby. Striding through the hail to- ward Heartsease’s room, he heard voices— the little woman's, low and sweet, and brisk, clear-cut, unknown tones—and a lit- tle gurgling voice keyed to high notes. “Hush, baby, hush,” the clear-cut voice said chidingly Heartsease had company!—was there no let-up to a man's misery anywhere? But the door opened and the little woman came slowly, painfully toward him. “Oh, Pom!" and her woice had reproach- ful echoes in it. Wait till she knew the worst! In the dusk of the little hall the baby escaped instant notice. “Oh, Pom, she’s come—she took a car- riage and just got here a minute or two ago.”” “Who's come? Not Cousin Agatha? Tell me quick!” “Yes, of course—Cousin Agatha. Did you forget she was coming to see us?” The gentle, reproachful voice tried hard to be stern and cutting, but he did not heed it in the least. He was pushing by her, holding out a limp bundle at arm's length. “The saints be thanked!” he was ejacu- lating heartily. “Let me pass, little wo- man. I've got her baby—it’s all safe.” ‘ou've got what?” “Cousin Agatha’s baby—here it is. No, jolted on block after block, mak- | BABY INTO HER LAP. faces in horrified silence. Then they laugh Cousin’s Agatha’s baby, on the other side of the parti laughed too. he professor came to himself first, and picked up the disregarded baby stolidly, arranging the little clothes with a certain proprietary concern. “TM carry this one back,” he said, sclemnly. “Ill find Cousin Agath — his mother, or something will break!” “I should think so!’ cried Heartsease. “His mother’s heart will break.” He tramped down the hal with a resolute tread that inspired poor little Heartscase with a minimum of courage jood-bye, Pom,” she quavercd. after tim, “and don’t give him to the wrong mother again!” “Hoper-may-die,"" came back faintly to hee from the front door as it closed upon Prof. Pomeroy Pettingill Lee and the wrong baby. Outside in the cool air the baby woke up wailed in distinct rebellion to existing umstances. “There—the-r crooned the tossing the little bundle of clothe up and dewn till the baby in very aston- ishment stopped crying and eyed him out of round blue eyes. Instinetively he professor to appreciate the professor's distres mind, and gurgled sympathetic little re- marks intended for comfort. He did not again at all. To iake a car and go back to the s the professor's first thought. I a dim idea that the baby’s proper owner might be there waiting for him to bring it back. Anyway, he would go there—it Was something to do. He hailed a car and established himself and the astonished baby in it. Ina ner opposite sat a Httle woman in evident distress of mind. She was agi- tated and uneasy, and seemed to be search- ing for something, fumbling about her anxiously. ‘The professor's gaze lighted upon her, and his heart gave an exultant leap. It was Cousin Agatha looking for the baby. The baby’s mother was still “Cousin Agatha” to the professor's dazed, uncertain mind. “She's little and anxious, and she's look- ing for something—by all that’s mighty I've run against her the first thing!” he thought in inexpressible relief. He staggered across to the little woman's corner and dropped the baby into her lap. “Here it is, ma’am,” he said, eagerly. “I_was just going to find—" : The little woman recoiled in amazement and displeasure. “Land! she cried. “Take it away, quick!” holding out the wondering baby to him. : “I—ah—that is, I thought you had lost something,” murmured the diminished pro- fessor, tucking the wriggling infant meek- ly under his arm again. “Well, I have, but ‘tain't a baby—land!” cried the little woman sharply. “I’ve lost my best pocket handkerchief—it was the one Ann Sophy gave me Christmas.” The other passengers were smiling broad- ly among themselves. The little woman edged further Into her corner and regarded the poor professor distrustfully. She seemed to be expecting another attack at any mo- ment, and only breathed freely when he and his unwelcome little charge got off the car. “The plot thickens,” muttered Prof. Pom- eroy Pettingill Lee, despairingly. “I reckon we're in for it, little chap. He hovered weakly about the waiting room for a while, and then went to the ticket agent. “Isn't there a place here where you leave —ah—things that have been lost, until—’ he began. “Certainly, certainly, sir! room where any lost articles called for by the owner. it to me—" The professor applied the rumpled baby to the small square opening. “I guess it'll squeeze through—it’s limp,” he said, cheerfully. “Mighty Caesar, man, it's a baby! We don't keep that kind ‘of property! Er— take it back at once, sir. I—it’s golng to ery—sharp or you'll drop it! Drop it? Oh, no, there was no danger. There wasn’t any place on the top of the earth to drop it into. He shouldered it again with a muffled groan, and turned away. The tiny head nestled against his cheek in drowsy content. A little thrill of wakening tenderness set the professor's heart strings to vibrating gently. “Poor little chap!” he found himself thinking. plan was to parade the streets, evident ‘We have a are kept until If you will pass The next in the desperate hope of running upon the right mother among all the mothers. “She ought to come toward it like a needle to a magnet,”” reasoned Prof. Pomeroy Pettin- sill Lee, wisely. “By all that’s mighty, I'll give her a fair chance! But the mothers who met them and passed them and jostled them were all the wrong mothers. Once he spied a little wo- man in earnest conversation with a taller one. They were in evident consultation. “What would you do? I'm at my wit's end. I've tried everything,” the small wo- man was saying, rather excitedly. Her clear-cut, distinct tones reached the pro- fessor'’s ear intact. “I'd advertise,” the tall woman sald, Promptly. “That's the way I found mine.’ By all that was might—the professor hur- ried up to them eagerly. In his one glimpse of the little woman's face he was sure it was Cousin Agatha. Besides, wasn't she just on the eve of advertising for the baby? “There is no need of it, ma'am,” he stut- tered, hastily. ‘I've got it right here. I've been looking for you ever since I—ah—ran away with it aceidentally. I assure you, ores { He was pressing the baby upon her, re- Gardless of the fact that the small red face was in inverse ratio to mother nature's plans for it. The bewildered little woman stared hopelessly down at the back of the bal head. Why!” she gasped. i “Of all things!” cried the taller lady. Tken they both laughed. The professor's <restfallen, Gespairing face was too much for them. Give it back, he said with a groan, “T've hit on the wrong one again. I've been hunting all over everywhere to find its mother. I'm not certain now it ever had one. There tsn’t anything certain!” “I'm sorry,” the litte woman cried heart- ily. Her sweet, pleasant voice cheered him vneonsciously. “But, you see, it isn’t my baby. Mine's at home in its cradle. I dcn’t see what made you think-—" “You spoke of advertising, ma'am. “O, yes—was that it? I was going to ad vertise for a coo! - “But really,” interposed the other iady curiously, “I wish you'd tell us how you came by the baby. i “I ran away with it,” the professor said gloomily, “and with your p2rmission T'll do so again now And once more he was continuing his hopeless hunt, shifting the sleeping baby from one tired arm to the other, and peer- ing anxiously into all the little women’ faces. “If I found her I shouldn’t dar> to hand the little chap over to her,” he mused. “It’s mighty risky busmess.”* But help was at hand. It came from the quarter least exp, The professor met two of bis coll-ge Boys and in the frenzy of despair stopped them. Boys,” he said, “if you had somebody else's baby and didn’t want it, what would you Go with it?” “Drop it,” said one of the boys promptly. The other one’s face was suddenly enlight- ened. “O, Tsay, profes you come along with m>. TI know where she is,” he cried, and nis voice was music in Prof. Pomeroy Pet- tinzill Lee's ears. “L was down at the station, you know. I saw her when she got back and you weren't there. Hi! didn’t she rave, though! Then somebcdy came along that sne called “Tom.” I heard ‘em say they were going to the station to set the police on you. The boy laughed. He was hurrying the professor aleng. - “Here, lt me take the little kid. Y Nl find her all right, Here's the sta- Here's look all used up. V professer—den’t you worry. tion—and, here you are, professor! the kid's’ mother herself!” This time the baby and the right mother me together with perfec atisfactory results. Prof. Pomeroy Pettingill Lee never re- membered what explanations he made or bew he got home, His memory lea gap there and began again at the Goor where pale, anxious httle Hearts met him. “O, Pom?” flection asked pwered her: “Yes, Heartsea he laughed aloud with relief. hen come right in, dear boy, and see Cousin Agatha’s baby.” Her voice and the upw everything. His voici He stopped at the threshold. “Never!” he cried grimly. “I’ve se2n all of Cousin Agatha’s baby I want to. CHRISTIAN ENDEAVOR NOTES Yhristian Endeavor topic is st’s Mission on Earth,” and many of the District sogieties have planned to have missionary meetings. The Scripture lesson is John 40, 7-18, and on this the Rev. Teunis S. Hamlin,/ D.D., pastor of the Church of the Covenant, this city, and one of the trustees of the United Society cf Christian Endeavor, says: “Our Lord here distinctly defines His mission; He came that we might have overflowing life; and whoever of us lives meagerly, pinched and half starved as to grace, dues so only be- cause he falls to accept what Christ came to bring to every believer.”” The Y.P.S.C.B. of the First Presbyterian Church has unanimously chosen Miss Flor- ence Mullican as its delegate to the inter- national convention at Nashville in July. The North Presby rian Church Y. P. . recently gave an exceedingly pleasant atriotic social at the home of Mr. and Mrs, William Henry, 1117 S street northwest. There were tableaux and patriotic song: and the whole evening was most thorough: ly enjoyed by the hundred or more persons present, : The Intermediate Christian Ende: ety pleasant or So- Calvary Baptist Chureh held a very hook in the sociable Sunday s house last evening. An interesting pro- am had been provided, which consi: of piano, violin and vocal solos and re me of those who took part w adie Harnest, Gussie Thill, Car ing, Leora Goddard and Dottie Hee- This was followed by games and re hments, and all were made to feel more acquainted with each other and better fitted to work togethe The societies composing the District C. Union are engaging in the work of fur- ing to the volunteers at Camp Alger ure, comfort bags and other accept able and useful articles. The following di- ons have been issued by the union's officers te the various societies, and are pub- lished here for the purpose of assisting the werk of helping the country’s defenders: Literature, such as Magazines, both cur- rent and back numbers, periodicals, books, denominational and weekly papers of all inds, is greatly needed. Send all that you can obtain, that is, good reading matter, to your own church at your earlizst conven- dence.” The June meeting of the executive coim- mittee of the District Union will be held in the vestry of Calvary Baptist Church next Monday evening. At this meeting new officers of tne union will be elected, who will take charge of the union work on Sap- tember 1. Important announcements rela- tive to the Nashville convention trip of local Endeavorers will be made by the ’98 transportation committee. An address will b2 made by Rev. Mr. Dunn, the assistant pastor of the First Congregational Church, this city, on “Good Literature.” Previous to this meeting of the executive committec a meeting of the union correspondence com- tation: Miss rie Bi ter. mitte will be held in the parlor adjoining -the vestry of the church. This latter meet- ing will be held at 7:15 o'clock, and to it have been invited, in addition to the mem- bers of the correspondence commitize, the chairmen of the good literature committees of the various societies in the union. ——_—. School Savings Banks. From the Pittsburg Tin-es, The Pittsburg Bank for Savings has is- sued a little leaflet on the subject of sav- ings banks in schools, and the matter pre- sented is worthy of reading. One great fault with the American people is the want {| of economy. Money. received on pay day | is parted with unsystematically, but com- pletely, before the next sum is due, and in a large number of American homes where thrift should reign and a tidy sum should always be on hand there is a continual and needless struggie to'pay the bills that are regularly coming due. The chief idea of a school savings bank is not the accumula- tion of money by the childish patron, but to acquire the habits of economy that are thus taught. z i In matters of money the average man and woman are children. They have a dol- lar, and they see something that it will buy. The dollar goes. The prudent way of getting value for that dollar would be to weigh the advantages of the many things that dollar would buy and to select the most valuable one. Money is worth what it will bring. next week it will bring something of more value than what it will bring today thefe fs 4 profit in waiting un- til next week before parting with it. If the school savings bank can impress this upon the mind of the child a benefit greater than imagined will be conferred. The child who learns the use of money and to keep his money until he gets value for it is the most useful: citizen, other things being equal. He is always a reserve force, and when panic comes it is he who supplies the power that tides over. Were all people thrifty there would be no serious panics and ao great amount of destitution. What we could save against an emergency and do not save is the difference between comparative com- fort and the intermittent poverty of hard times. $e Hicks—“I notice that Charley's wife hasn’t touched the Piano since she was married.” ‘Wicks—“No; the fact is she thinks the world of bim."—Boston Transcript, OUT OF THE SERVICE Schemes by Which Sailors and Sol- diers Get Their Discharges. REQUIRE INGENUITY AND PATIENCE But None of Them Succeed in Time of War. PUNISHMENT FOR DESERTION a Written for The Evening Star. ONE OF THE REG- ular schemes worked by enlisted men to get out of the army and navy before the expiration of th enlistments is pra ticable now tha state of war ex Therefore, this bit of a sketch of how e listed tin beth Services obtain their discharge in times ot without either paying for them or waiting for their terms of enlistment to run out, cannot be put down telling of tal out of school that is liable to work harm to the sePVices. The soldier er sailor in th ie vice of the United States could do, wit cemparative impunity, a lot of things last year, or even up to April 22 of this ye that he cannet do now without jeopard ing his neck. The declaration of war makes all the Gifference. Both the army and navy books ations teem with prescriptions of “death, in time of war: in time of peace, such punishment a general court-martial” may dish out, for serious military offenses. In time of peace, the soldier gets, say, six months in the guard house, and a restoration to dut for offenses that are now, when war ists, punishable by nothing short of death. Three months ago a soldier or sailor, vcaried of his service, could have “jumped his outst,” and, upon capture, his sen- tence would have emounted to from six months’ to two years’ imprisonment in a military penitentiary. Just now, the sol a men peace, as a of reg! dier who deserts is liable to get, as his last view of humankind, the sight of a firing party of haif dozen of his comrades— ene of whom may or may not have a blank in his gun, which, however, makes no dif- ference in the inevitable result—before the ndkerchief is bound over his eyes. More- cver, sailors in the United States service ire careful, those of them who get shore liberty—and shore liberty is rare enough in Uncle Samuel's line of fighting packets st now—not to overstay their leaves. It is merely a custom, nota law, that holds a liberty-breaking bluciacket to be no di ter until he has overstayed his shore leave for the period of ten days. Command- 5 officers may, at their discretion, in time ef war, declare a man forward a deserter if he remains ashore an hour after he is due back aboard his Ship. Skippers in our service are not prone to be so hard upon the blue Kets as their discretion in this matter permits them to be, but, all the m the bluejackets are not taking any chances, and, until the treaty of peace is igned between “the United States, party of the fir and what remains of Spain, they will be back on board. their ships on time te the moment when their shore liberty is up. Discharge by Purchane. Up ta the declaration of war, the soldier ailor here and there in our two ser- who found he had made a mistake in getting into a government uniform, and who wanted to get out of the service by any hook or crook short of de: various ready-made and often-worked smes from’ which to choos yw, al enlisted man, when no war is in progress, ut of either of this gov- Widing erting, had dl appli- cation for a discharge by rchase has been good. But very few tout of elther the two services by purch: In the fi t place, few men, badly as they wish to resume the ple: S of Civil lite, care to pay for that priv whi a costly one, difficult of accomplishment except by men who have well-tixed re . The shorter the time a man has becn in his service, the greater the amount of money it requires for him to secure his discharge by purcha e discharge-purchase rates decreese in proportion to the time the man who wants to get out serves in his branch. Jt dwindles to almost nothing when the man’s term of enlistment is practically con- cluded. In the ond place, very few the men who want to get out could mal the discha pureh, plan “stick,” even if the; ten times the amount of money required, for the reason that, when they become inwardly the dust of the service off of their heels, nine out of ten of them have committed serious infractions of discipline, and done their bits of time for the which puts them out of the class “enlisted m who, upon unvarying good conduct, are given the privilege of purcha: their dis charges from the servic Leaving by Order. Before the discharge-by-purchase regula- tion was made young men who found, after they entered one or other of our military services, that they had no “vocation therefor, and who could muster the as- sistance of influential men, contrived to doff their uniforms through the scheme known as “by order’’—by order, that is, of the Secretary of War or the Secretary of the Navy. The Secretaries of the two mili- tary bureaus were never exceedingly pro- fuse in the dishing out of these favors, and the enlisted man’s people had to make a pretty hefty fight to get the order is- ued—a peremptory affair, requiring that ‘Jchn Smith of Z Company of the 0th In- fantry shall be discharged the _ service, without honor, upon the receipt of this o: der by the commanding officer of the post. Nevertheless, the enlisted men who had “people” behind them always tried this sckeme first of all, and deferred attempt- ing the other plans for getting out of the service until they ascertained if the “ order” plan “went” or not. Even now, when the discharge-by-purchase regulation is in operation, discharges by order are eccastonally—only very _ occasionally—is- sued in cases where enlisted men have heavy influence at their backs. Fewer men have secured their discharges in this way since Secretary Alger became chief of the war establishment than since the institu- tion of the discharge-by-purchase law. At the outset of his secretaryship Mr. Alger declared against the practice with empha- sis, stating that all of the enlisted men in the army should have a fair deal, but no favor. Working for a Bobtail. The ordinary, every-day soldier, a “no- body” in the sense of having no powerful backing to help him along in case he want- ed to “get shut” of the army, had to make his point by the tedious, difficult and heart-breaking ordeal known among the enlisted men as ‘‘working for a bobtail. A bobtail is a dishonorable discharge. The man who went deliberately to work to get a bobtail discharge had his pace cut out for him, and he had to play it fine. The skillful worker for a bobtail was the man who eventually gained his bad discharge with the shortest incarcerations in the guardhouse, There was never any exact law on the subject, but the unwritten law of the United States army, when peace prevails, is that the soldier who gets seven summary courts-martial for minor offenses 1s eligible, upon his eighth infrac- tion of regulations, for general court-mar- tial and a dishonorable discharge from the service, with or without imprisonment. The soldiers understand this, and when a man wants to get out of his uniform very badly he is willing to begin the whirl. From a fairly good or even an excellent soldier he becomes an utterly worthless, reckless, no-account soldier. Take, for example, 4 man who concludes, afier he has served six months in the army, that he has had enough of it, but who doesn’t want to de- sert, out of fear of capture, or because he doesn’t care to shoulder the disgrace of deserting. He goes on a pay-day spree and overstays his leave. For this he gets, probably, a summary court-martial and ten mill,” he goes | y see to ft that soldiers call “a his second release from the cf upon another spree, thi his sentence is what the month and a month”—that is, thirty days | in the guard house and the loss of a! month's pay. This makes three “sum- | maries.” as the soldiers call summary | courts-martial. The bob-tall worker gets in these three terms within the space of some- thing under three months. A Tedious Process. | Upon his release the third time, he watts a week or so, and then does something around quarters—fails to sweep under his slouches his work as reom orderly or Goesn’t appear at guard mount with a! clean gun—that gets him another summary court-martial, and, say, ten days more in the guard house. ‘Then, upon beng turned loose, he goes on another jamb This makes five summaries. The bob- il work- er has by this time got himself pretiy well pushed forward for a “general” and a bad discharge, and he achieves his seventh sum- mary court-martial in the ace of me- thing a bit. under or above six mont Then, upon his final break-out, he is a general court-martial, no maiter minor the nacure of his offense, and tailed.” It does not ~dge of American military life to p that this is a somewhat arduous anc ne require much knowl- 1 pain ful process, especially when consideration is given to the fact that during each an all of his various incarcerations In t cuard house the bob-iail worker Is ¢ lied, 2 point of a sentry’s bayonet to work fatigue call at gray dawt ef mort n the afiernoor like a dray theless, there was aiways at in every two or t whose general line of conduct made it 4 > his bunktes that he was work for a Dob-tail, It ts not to be hat the officers did bot apprehend this*fact themselves. Ofter », they the bob-tail. wor th as possible by giv ly heavy seatenc summary courts-mart worker always had to the possibilicy sentence alc charge by = gets another ten-day, or perhaps a f mont at the Brooklyn navy yard and was day, term in the nk.” By this time | assigned to the Chicago as a landsman. his officers are beginning to consider him a |The Chicago was then fitting out at the anther off-color soldier, so that when, upon | navy yard. The scapegrace @idn't. like landsmanizing, and he appealed to his p ple to have him turned | They clined to listen to his appeals and se the customary re lying in it. So the sei e fixed up @ scheme. Most of the s: oung women f New York society te visit the Chicago for the sake of seeing “Jackie” ia Dluegacket toes. Phey came in dr ¥ day. The officers of the ing the young women as hieh-cia visitors, avored to e but the young womer y wanted to see * jacket for'ar ey began te ay youth was duly an of weeks in this wise t to the skipper for the The scapegrace beached > EUROPEAN FIRE FIGHTERS, h the Flames in How They Ex ormany Hol From Household Words. The alarm created by the nm erent fire ta London will probably lead to steps ng taken for rendering the metropolitan brik more effici ‘ > coping with large contiagr In con- nection with this it Is int come pare Londen r is with t Seon the contir for the extingy f tir In Amsierdam the firemen are a - The street alarms calling th : that no is more thar ¥ 5 e 0 There r t eer pee te them with pe. 7 By the Plug § person thus < the she ruits in the army whose ideal of | without bringing bearers to jierirg was painted, before their taxing | cn, in colors altogether too rosy, and who | In Germany. call boxes are very mumene found the genuine article of soldicring | Of the tre ie nleniel Treinen aptly, very different from what they conceived | patched acc the tire as it to be before donning their first sv Jit is siena 1 reat government straights, had a way of Most German firemen curious % rg out of the army by what is know note, are telegraph clerks. A great feature the outfit as the “piug route.” They would | of German tire brigade work the pre- pretend to be utter dol! They could | vention unnecessary damage by wate learn nothing. The simplest movement in | As eve ay known, the water weed: for drill could not be crummed into their ap- | extinguishing a fire does almost as much parentiy thick skulls. They could do noth- | damage to the contents of a building ing right, were forever on the lag, per-| the flames themselves. The Gert enka petually in the way, slouchy, shambling, | men pay particular attention to this incapable, imbecile. This is a harder game | and do not flood the b with than it may appear. Plenty of aciiatiy | but use it eniy where it is necessary . bright men have tried it, and failed dis- | firemen’s clothes can be fnflated with mally, for the simple reason thai they | Water if occasion requires it. The blouse Positively could not ferce themselves to | @nd trousers are made of a double layer act like no-accounts. The enlisted man | 0f canvas and by means of a tap attached who carries the plug manner abopt with | to the hose for this purpose eman can him is regarded suspiciously by the officers, | fill the waterpr ace between the tw who are familiar with recruits’ endea jlayers with r immediatey. if to slip out of uniform via the plug route, | much water is poured in, the surplus es- and if a man forgets himself for a moment | Capes through a valve and pours down and exhibits uncorscious aptness in drill | Over the wearer like a fountain, thus dou- or at eny one of his tasks under th yes bly protecting him from. the Sam eee. of one of these susp officers, his | Smoke helmet ts also aby Germans, as chances of working his scheme are not a a eee eee only exploded, but he stands a heavy shi w ves a8 an mit Chamber, which ts sled of getting himself court-martialed for in by aa alr pump, with which Ave ctioccagges different soldiering The man who docs | Provided. By this means the lungs are the job skillfully, however, and really suc- | Supplied with air and the head kept cor ‘ds in making it plain that he will never | While the escaping air clears away th amount to a row of beans as a sc smoke and er at = the Grem: ace srkek- let out “without honor” after he has t he ng “Tees sie Rreean Bs Gale es oughly exhibited his pluggisiness. There | enter a burning roc < are not many men who get out this way, rhe ¢ however. Like the malingerer, the assum- 5 ahh yc ed plug is almost bound to make a slip in | the first floor window the acting of his part. If a man really | onto the window sill, pu knows anything about soldiering h Yas | hoc ks it en the win the st difficulty in covering his | Teaches the roof. He the a yar api trom! wie pent alae éraws up a hose pipe and sets te work shr officers er non-commissioned Of all the continental shesize yr cers. probably the most perfectly equipped He Knew Too Much. outbreaks of fire. There are numerous The writer has cbeerved some funny in- | ey accra tng ote ant ingenious stances of th example ago a man enlisted for the cne of the receiving ships. a few yeacs navy on board He had been honcrably discharged trom the ar) re he entered the + ni therefore Gid not, of cour naval recruitit r that he had ever seidiered. ©) y_after this man donned his biuejacket form he was sent from the receiving | ship to the navy yard with a battalion raw landsmen to be instructed in infa | crill by an old marine sergeant, j master of the receiving ship. he dishonorably discharged soldier in the bluejacket uniform—who knew bis danger of beimg hauled up for fraudulent enlist- ry the drill- ment in the navy if he ave himself away” in drili—tried desperately to be the thickest-headed man in his battalion in the way he handied himself and hi it wouldn't do. ‘The old marine drili-master got his eye on him. He gave an imyp ble order, which all of the other men in the battalion, except the ex-soldier, tried clumsily to obey. The ex-soldier absent- mindedly decimed to attempt to execute the impossible order—such orders being often given in dil in the army to “try out” skilled men—and the old marine drill-mas- ter nailed him. He aidn't say anything gun. aloud about it, not caring to get the ex- dier in trouble, but he slipped up behind im and said, “My lad, you've been with the dough-boys.” ‘The Soldier, seeing that s little game was up, then jumped in and did a bit of drifling with his raw battalion that opened the men’s eyes, but the drill+ master did rot give him away. Working Moribund Relatives. Bluejackets in the United States navy have also always had various well-con- trived and frequently sucessful schemes to work themselves “over the side” without being put to the necessity of jumping ship or purchasing their discharges. Malinger- ing, of many different sorts, is of course commonly employed, but naval surgeons of these latter y are too shrewd for any but the most scientific bluejackets in the malingering business, and more un- usual methods have to be worked up. The bluejacket on a home station who wants terribly to get ashore for good and all makes the dying relative plan go through once in a while, especially if he does not amount to much aboard ship. He springs a plaintive tale of a slowly passing relative of whom he is the single and solitary sup- port and comfort, and backs up the nar- rative with numerous appealing letters and telegrams, dates and places all correct, and with no sign on them of having been carefully gotten up by a pal at the other end of the line. The skipper looks over this mass of corroborative data, and gives the man his discharge or doesn't, accord- ing as his lights inform him that the biue- jacket at the mast is a truthfui tar or a liar of the most ingenious character. The skipper has a way of informing himself on these matters that bluejackets occa- sionally figure on with little prescience. Moreover, the commanding officer once in a while catches the bluejacket working the dying relative scheme by asking the tar if a furlough wouldn't do him as well. The tar, anxious to get out of the service for geod and all, shows his anxiety too openly by saying that the furlough wouldn't do at all, and when asked why, he traps himself in his efforts to explain why. Getting Beached. The naval bluejacket doesn’t call it “working for a bobtail.” He calls his ef- forts to get out of the service an attempt to get himself “beached.” A dishonorably- discharged man is called in the navy a “beached’ man, and sailors as well as sol- diers try on the worthless dodge to get quit of their service. They never go ashore that they do-not return rum-incapable; never figure at quarters that they do not appear out of uniform or slovenly; never mix in a general drill that they do not fall over themselves; smoke on deck out of hours, shirk duty, growl constantly, the monotone of their complaints being pitch- ed to reach the ears of the oificer of the deck; make nuisances of themselves in gen- eral, and finally get themselves beached. A man cannot, of course, be beached un- less he is tried and sentenced to dishonor: ble discharge, and no man can be beached under any circumstances whatsoever in a foreign country. It goes without saying, of course, that no man with a particle of self-respect would convert himself into a no-account and a ruffian for the sake of being eventually permitted to sneak over the side of his ship with his hammock and ditty bag and a dishonorable discharge in his pocket, and the same rule applies to the bobtail worker in the army. Still Another Scheme. A swell young New York man, the scape- days in the guard house. He no sooner is | 8Tace of his family, got into the navy and released SSeS than he has | out again within a month a few years ago. @ scrap with some comrade in quarters and He skipped aboard the receiving ship Ver- { which ts equally at the drunk- €n or rewdy person or the real discoverer jof a fire—which must be smashed befor the alarm can be given, there is a key Numbered keys for the cll boxes are fre ly supplied to all respectable citiz wt are responsible their use. On discove ing a fire the unlocks the and the alarm; when this h n do: the key can t be withdrawn until anot has been unlocked, the key for which only firemen 7 s. From the numbered n the lock the name of the person giv ing the alarm can be found, as a reg ster is kept citizens to whom keys have . with the number of each key. TheVienna fire brigade turns out more quickly than any other European brigade. In driving to the scene of fire one of the brigade sits by the and blows a trumpet, distance which can be away, and is a to pull aside until the gine has passed. A water cart follows the engine, and so an immediate supply of water is at hand while the fire plug ing found. Thus many small fires would soon extend are nipped in th A great peint is also made of the rij plicution of water, which is used with gr economy. It stands to sense that a pint ef water at the right spot is better the gallon in the wrong = oe THE MOSQUITO SONG. ‘aused by Action of Wings and the Insect Breathing. From the Strand Magazine. You can best observe the mosquito in ac- tion by letting one settle undisturbed the back of your hand, and waiting whi! she fills herself with your blood; you cana easily watch her doing so with a pock+t lens. Like the old lady in “Pickwick.” she ts soon “swelling wisibly.” n She gorges herself with blood, indeed, which she straightway di assimilates and con- verts into But if, while she ts sucking, you gently and uaobtrusiveiy tighten the skin of your hand by clench- ing your fist hard you wiil find that she cannot any longer her mandi- bles; they are caught fast in your flesh by their own harpoon-like teeth, and the she must stop accordingly il you choose to release her. If you then kill her in the usual manner by a smart siap oi the Land, you will sce that she is literally full of biood, having sucked a good drop of it. The humming sound itsel! by which the mosquito announces her approaching visit is produced by two distinct manners. The deeper notes which go to make up her droning song are due to the rapid vibra- tion of the female insect’s wings as she flies; and these vibrations are found by means of a siren (an instrament which measures the frequency of the waves in notes) to amount to about 3,009 in a min- ute. The mosquito’s wings mu: there- fore, move with this extraordinary rapid- ity, which sufticiently accounts for the dif- ficulty we have in catching one. But the higher and shriller notes of the complex melody ase due to special stridu- lating organs situated like little drums on the openings of the air tubes; for the adult mosquito breathes no longer by one or two air entrances on the tail or back, like the larva, but by a number of spiracles, as they are called, afranged in rows along the sides of the body and communicating with the network of internal air chambers. The curious mosquito music thus gener- ated by the little drums serves almost be- yond a doubt as a means of attracting inale mosquitoes, for it is known that the long hairs on the antennae of the males vibrate sympathetically in union with the notes of a tuning fork, within the range of the sounds emitted ‘by the female. in other words, hair and drums just answer to one another. We may, therefore, rea- sorably conclude that the female sings in order to please and attract her wandering mate, and that the antennae of the mate are organs of hearing which eatch and respond to the buzzing music she pours forth for her lover's ears. A whole swarm of gnats can be brought down, indeed, by Uttering the appropriate note of the race; you can call them somewhat as you can call male glow worms by showing a light which they mistake for the female. —— Unique Blotters. From the Memphis Scimitar, A Philadelphia man owns a most unique assortment of pieces of blotting paper, col- lected by his father, who was long an offi- cial of the White House, each of which bears, reversed, the signature of a Prosi- dent, from General Harison, who died a fad. 0} aes the moe ehy ined mn one it Bi of the lot, the last official lettor signed by President Linecln was blotted before he Was assassinated by Booth,