Evening Star Newspaper, January 14, 1898, Page 13

i THE EVENING STAR, FRIDAY, JANUARY 14, 1898—16 PAGES. JOOSS 20860 A610 NAN tL VE responsible for the good . 1,575 WINT 1,250 ELEGANT OVERCOATS, AT ne MUAIRISTEID) JPIRIUGIES FOR SPOT CASH ONLY. There isn’t a coat or a suit in the lot that isn’t right up to TODAY in cut—color—fabric—and style. You can hold us You may take any Suit or Overcoat home and examine it carefully. If it isn't BETTER—in every way than anything you ever bought before at the price—you needn't take the trouble of bringing it back—we'll SEND for it—and you can get your money on demand. $15.00 Suits and Overcoats Now $7.50 $20.00 Suits and Overcoats Now $10.00 behavior of every garment. ER SUITS, $25.00 Suits and Overcoats Now $12.50 $30.00 Suits and Overcoats Now $15.00 Boys’ and Children’s Clothing at an Equal Sacrifice! There’s a crowd coming—you haven’t a MINUTE to spare—if you want first choice. Open Saturday Night till 11 o'clock. M. DYRIENFORTHH é CQ. Twentieth Century Clothiers, 923 Pennsylvania Avenue Northwest. Br, By GSSSSSS80 © || @ BSOSS SSE GO0OLOSOl7SSSSODST OTT CORES 3S SESS 93 S999 SO990808S0 SSSlSSSOSS 6HO0595SS9809290008 NOW FOR A RUS We announce the closing out of our surplus stock of Winter Suits and Overcoats at exactly ONE-HALF actual #orfh— exactly one-half the price that’s marked on every price tag. The weather so far this winter has been unusually mild—and while we have done our share of business—we cannot take chances on carrying this immense surplus stock — a _ DAY, LONGER! We prefer to face a LOSS—and clear this store—than have Spring find us loaded down with winter ganrfients, OSO08080600000060 GOSSESOSOGHS HOE OOS 890505006 ot Chocolate, Cs i Tait mn, ean Tomato Bouillon, op in while you're down town during the dey—and after the theater. We serve ICE CREAM SODA all the year round—have all the favorite flavors—the best im the city. STEVENS’ Pharmacy, Cor. 9th and Pa. Ave. H :Throughout the Stock E are getting ready to move six doors above in our new building. Prior to moving we're offering our stock of Artists’. Architects’ and Engineers’ St pplies at a dixcount of from 10 to 30 per cent. Rich bargain picking here now! : Fred A. Schmidt, 504 9th. no13-3m,24 am ‘sor mmm Clean, Dry — Rooms for Storage, §3 7" + That's just abeut ONE-HALF L * son'll have to other J an extra large jd te—are and renched by both freight a ?. Phone 659. foot. troubles. We rem ‘ns, bunions and callositi Permanently and painlessly. Our patent pads give infinite elif. J. J. GEORGES & SON, 1115 Pa. ave. ‘podiats. Hours: 8 to 6; Sundays, 9 to 1. i] SACRIFICE da of Furniture and short lengths a SONG! And On Parlor Lamps and Shade Rockers—Parlor Cabinets — C Chairs, Rockers, &c. Make up your mind TON vantage of these discount price: terest. All Carpets made, laid for waste in matching figures. CROCAN'S Between H ® e P4 a @ ) ® @ 2 © © @ ® 3 @ © 8 8 @ 4 S @ © © e 6 2 @ ® MAMMOTH CREDIT HOUSE, 26 © ©9G909009000959000 What Woman Is Missing This? These are precious days for the housekeeper. They are ys in every line of our stock. Odd pieces in fine Carpets are going for We are clearing the way for new goods—and right now is your chance to buy at a great saving. 25% Discount Credit! s—Mahogany Bed Room Suites—Three-piece Parlor Suites — Parlor Tables and silt Chairs and Children’s IGHT that you will take ad- Never mind about the MONEY—we are ready—willing and GLAD to arrange every payment to suit your convenience—no notes—no in- and lined FREE—no charge 817-819-821-823 Seventh St.N. W. and I sts, §a13-754 OSOSS HS HOSHID OO GOSHOSHSESHSTOCOEO METEOR’S FLIG aT CAUGHT. After Years of Failure the Camera Has Recorded the Phenomenon, From the Boston Transeript Prof. E. C. Pickering of Harvard, in writ- ing of recent astronomical work, says: “What has been considered an almost im- possible feat in astronomical circles up to the present time has at last been accom- | plished. For several years the Harvard observatory has been engaged in photo- graphing, in Cambridge and Peru, the spectra of all stars above the eighth magni- tude. I had hoped when this work was un- dertaken that a mejsor would some time cross the field of ong°of fhe photographic prisms while taking} the fpectra, but this aid not occur until recently. ‘The observa- tory now possesseg\am lexcellent phota- graph of a meteoric spectrpim, the first that is known to have been obtained. “Yhe photograph is of considerable im- portance, for, although the composition of the méteorites that have fallen to’ the earth is well known, this spectrum will de- termine the condition of shooting stats and meteorites before the great heat engender- ecd:in passing through the-atmosphere has time to consume the more fusible compo- nents. In other words, peaple can now tell What goes to make up, to some extent, the jfhesting star, which) passes so.quickly that it can only he hed by having a camera gaping open watting for it to cross the sky, photograph was taken on June 18, in Arequipa, Peru, the South Ameri- can station of the observatory. It was a sheer plece of good luck. Thousands of | plates hayebeen exposed to the sky with the pristh‘over the mouth of the camera ready to take a spectrum of anything that traversed the heavens. The lucky plate that caught the meteor has running across it obliquely a light band of six lines, the trail of the shooting star. The spectrum of the meteor taken Arequipa shows four hydrogen lines at dif- ferent colors in the spectrum, and two other lines that are unknown quantities at Many variable stars, those whose off from time The muddy Potomac water is not fit to wash your clothes. We use arte- sian well water—and even filter that, which accounts for our pure white clean clothes. Send along a postal or ‘phone 592 for one of our wagons | to call after your wash. | Frazee’s Laundry, 512 Sth st. 1322 14th st. G05 13th st. 3109 M st. Jjal3-20d eecerdonieateeteetensentonsoatbetee stor Great Reduction In Hair. Switches, £ 50, formerly _ $5.00. Switches, $6.00, formerly $10.50. Gray Switches, $3.00, formerly Gray Switches, $4.50, formerly Hs First-class attendants in Hairdressing, Shampooing, ete. Imperial Hair Regenerator for restoring gray hair. Never fails S. HELLER’S, 720 7th Street N. W. to time, ha ‘a photograph- ed. The four hydrogen:lines of the meteor correspond to four ordinarily found in the variable star spectra. One of the unknown lines caught in the meteor spectrum appears in those of certain Nobody knows what element is repr ed by this line, as it does not cor: to any found on this earth. So far all that is known of the meteor is that it contains hydrogen, and, of course, something a little more substantial. The results show an im- portant resemblance in the chemical com- positions of meteors and certain stars, and vaguely promise that some day the up of a meteor may be as easy to discover as that of ordinary salt.” a a a as as is ta st te ee ee ee eee aaa ee The News of Our Semi-Annual Suit Sale Is spreading from house to house, carrying the wonderful, extra= sete in the long run. back. individual measure. Mertz and Mertz, “New Era” Tailors, 906 F Street N. W. After all, ordirary values and money-saving inducements to men folks who are always quick to take advantage of the grand offerings that this Clearing Event of ours unfurls. grasp the present opportunities that invariably come out ahead You practice this policy in business= not put the same principle into effect concerning the cost of your Clothing expenses? We remind you again that without reserva- tion we are offering Suits made from every piece of Fancy Cheviot Cioth in our house that sold up to $19.97 it’s the Men who then, why $ -70 ae 12 Made-to-Order. And we are also selling Suits made from e Cheviot that sold up to $12.97 at $@ 37 very piece of Fancy Made-to-Order. As customary, every Suit we make is cut and tailored to your These Suits will be modeled in accordance with the best taste--not a stylish wrinkle omitted anywhere-- actually permeated with fashion, beauty and shape. have the Coat cut Double-breasted or Single-breasted -- and if they do not fit, we stand ready at any time to You can give your money — THEY ARE HER BOYS. Old Chiengo Woman Sews Buttons for Street Waifs. From the Philadelphia Prese.. A dear old Chicago lady, who prefers to remain unnamed, being left alone in her declining years, has adopted all the street urchins as her family. There are too many of them to take to her home and she is too feeble to care for so large a family in that way. She therefore seeks them out and gives them mittens and pulse warmers of her own make. She also sews buttons on their clothes and does light mending for them. The pulse-warmers are of peculiar construction, cut from a pattern of her own devising. The upper side {s made longer than the under and projects over the back of the hand, leaving the fingers free to make change or wield the blacking brush. Sometimes this kindly woman spends the entire night working for “her boys,” ply- ing the needle to replenish her stock, which is largely made from fulled cloth. Friends give her old clothes, and she uses the less- worn parts in making her mittens and pulse warmers. Once in a while she fills her roomy old bag with an assortment of buttons, needles and thread, and she sallies forth to seek the alleys, where her pro- teges congregate. There “she will devote herself to replacing buttons and sewing up rents in garments. = i kines | he dfyor do n A Whisky of the proj e a rity. “Six Veals Bia Pure. is the Governments Gu ee OD €' bottle of settee ac i shat goes wih eee: Gi ALL DEALERS SELL IT pineal vey 13 TRADE OF THE EAST Real Meaning of Russian Oocupation of Port Arthur. A VALUABLE ALLY TO CHINA Immense Importance of the Trans- Siberian Railroad. AIM OF THE NATIONS (Copyrighted, 1898, by Ewing Cockrell.) “The Partition of China.” Never has there been a more fruitful theme for the newspapers of the world than this. The occupation of Kiao Chau by the Germans, followed by the Russians sailing into Port Arthur, have been heralded by European correspondents as the beginning of the di- vision of the great eastern empire. Official sanction has apparently beer given to this view by the report that the Emperor Wil- helm remarked the other day, “China is like an artichoke; it has to be eaten bit by bit.” Yet there is probably not one chance in a hundred that any of us will ever live to see a partition of China, or even the beginning of it. And it is only necessary to look critically at the situation for a moment to see why such a division will probably never occur. Three German warships entered the bay at Kiao Chau and forcibly took possession of the forts there—the Chinese general “yielding to superior force.” On the other hand, a Russian fleet has occupied Port Arthur, “with the entire acquiescence of the Chinese government.” Is there no difference between the two cases? Most decidedly there is. There is a distinction that is most vital, and yet no one seems to have noticed it. Germany forcibly seizes Kiao Chau as China’s enemy. Russia peaceably anchors at Port Arthur, as China’s ally. And no opinion of the state of affairs in China today is worth the paper it is written on if it does not take full account of the fact that Rus- sia is really China's ally, and a faithfyl ally at that. This alliance is not composed of high- sounding protestations of mutual affection and admiration. Its basis is far firmer than that. It is a matter of self-interest with each power. And China’s interests in this friendship are many. China’s Tea Trade. First of all is her tea trade. In this China is in a very peculiar position. Tea is Chi- na’s chief export. Furthermore, it bears an export duty, that is one of the most im- portant revenues of the imperial govern- ment. Most of this trade is in the hands of d, but of late England has become largely a grower of tea elf. The product of British Indi padily increased, and is now ve iderable. And by means of the man India there are abundant facilities for the export of the tea. Consequently the tea trade of China suffers more and more every year. Its export steadily decr with this decrez ernment are steadily diminishing. And what is worse for China, the control of her trade in tea is chiefly in the hands of her rival in the production of t But if China had the internal means of communication that India has, if her in- terior provinces could be brought as close- ly within reach of western Europe as is the interior of India, she need no longer fear Anglo-Indian competition or lack of reve- nue. Now, this is exactly what Russia pro- poses to do for China. The trans-Siberian railroad is rapidly nearing completion. When finished, a branch line will probably be built into China, thus uniting most inti- mately the two great empires, and at the same time conferring upon China one of the greatest benefits she could receive. In an elaborate work on the Siberian railway and the trade between China and Russia, pub- lished by the department of trade and manufactures, under the direction of the Russian ministry of finance, may be found the following words: “In all probability, the continued decline of the tea trade will be a very serious ques- tion for China nd in this respect the Si- berian railw; may serve as a great sup- port for the Chinese tea trade.” ‘There- 1y ia, but China is most anxious that Russia should e an active part in the carriage and sale of tea in Eu- rope.” “The Siberian railway approaches so near the Chinese frontier that it would be quite possible by means of a branch line running into the borders of China to start direct commercial interchange with the thickly populated provinces of the interior of China. The conclusive force of these statements, official as they are, is plainly evident. Russin a Grent Tea Drinker. On one side, China is a great producer of tea, while on the other hand, Russia is a great ccnsumer of this product. In fact, the whole Slav naticn is a great nation of tea drinkers. The peasants al- most live on it and black bread, while in the houses of the higher classes the samovar and the tea pot stand in the din- ing room the whole day. Two thirds of the tea consumed in the great Slav empire comes in overland from China. It crosses the great Gobi desert by camel caravans to Kiakhta, thence goes by lake, river and dirt road to the river Ob, and then by river and a short rail- way to Nizhny Novgorod. In this way, tea to the value of nearly fifteen million dcllars is brought in annually. At Nizhny Novgorod, and even in Tomsk in Stfberia, are to be seen huge blocks of houses filled with nothing but tea. But this long, rough road is necessarily expensive and hazard- ous. Whereas with the new railroad and the branch into China, the expense will be greatly reduced, to the immense ad- vantage of Russia and her people. Other Interests in Common. ‘There are many other interest besides tea which Russia and China have in com- mon. For instance, there is timber. In many of the interior provinces,of China weod is so extremel? precious that it is sold by weight, having been brought there by camels from places nearly a thousand miles distant. While directly north of China, Siberia has forests of immense ex- tent, which so far have never been touched for commercial purposes. As it is now, we in the United States control China, but with the proximity of Siberia’s forests, this cannot continue, and in a little while there will be another important tie between China and Russia. Then there is a constant interchange of manufactured goods and raw products between the two countries, which will steadily increase. Thus it is that Russia and China are substantially allies, and that the alliance is not in name, but in fact. Therefore, it can be depended upon that if Russia al- lows other nations to partition China or even its sea coast, it will be either be- cause she desires such partition or else be- cause she cannot help herself. _ But why should Russia desire a parti- tion? Such partition means that an in- creased portion of Chinese trade will go to other nations, and that Russia’s share in this trade will be comparatively dimin- ished. It will be asked why would not Russia’s trade increase also, if she were to seize a part of China. The answer is that it would increase, but only to a slight extent, for it is a fact, though not gen- erally known, that Russia has now prac- tically everything she wants in China and in a year or two will be in an extremely enviable position. She does not need to have the sea ports and coast command in China that other powers need. These other powers must carry on their Chinese trade in ships, and must have sea ports. But Russia’s great trade with China is overland. And she wants it that way. Thus she has such a low duty on her Si- berian frontier on goods imported from China, that it pays to import’ them into European Russia through Siberia instead of by sea, though the cost of sea trans- portation is now far cheaper than by land. (Tea _can be brought from China by sea into European Russia for 15 cents a pound less than overland). Russia’s Interests Against Partition. Thus a partition of China would mean that other powers would carry from China into Europe ‘and from Eusepe into China, ilroads in commodities that would otherwise £0 through Siberia. Is it reasonable to sup- pose that Russia and Germany are acting in concert to do something that would de- feat all of Russia’s great objects in the far east? All Russia really needs on the Pacific coast of Asia is a good winter harbor, and outlet for her railroad. Viadivostock, the present railway terminus, is all right ex- cept for a small part of the winter, when the harbor there is frozen. Port Arthur, which is very near Viadivostock and can easily be connected with it by rail, is free from ice the whole year. And its occupa- tion by Russia will tend as much to the interests of China as Russia. In summer time, Russia has not only her railway, but also her great Siberian rivers, which are of inestimable commercial im- portance, and which are constantly in- creasing in value. For instance, the Amoor, which flows between China and Russia, Is as long as the Mississippi and is navigable for 2,000 miles. Yet steamer service on this great highway is still in its infancy, though developing rapidly. .And from Nikolaevsk at the mouth of the Amoor to Viadivostock and its surrounding bay, and from Vladivostock to Shanghai in gg there is now a regular steamer serv- ce. From this, it will be apparent that Rus- sia needs nothing more, so far as regards the trade situation in the far east. And n.cre than this, she ts equally favored in the political situation. Few aware of how great is Russia’s influence in China. The postal service from Pekin to the north is wholly in the hands of Rus- sia. In Mongolia, the currency in use (which, by the way, is bricks of tea and silk), is expressed in Russian money and not Chinese. The Russian consul is far mcre important there than the Chinese general. He is considered even on state matters by the Chinese as well as by the Mongols. For a traveler, a Cossack cap is his best p-otection. In Corea of late it is Russian influence which has become para- nount in the collection of revenue and in the management of the country’s finances. And even now in Pekin, it is Russia and erly Russia that China is cor sulting in re- gard to the present state of affairs. All this power of Russia in China, be it noted, has been gained by peaceful means, by agreements redounding as much to the berefit of China as Russia. Is it likely that Russia will now turn around and attack her friend snd ally—a friend from whom she can get all she wants by peaceful means? Power of R ia and China. But grant that Russia is against the par- tit‘on of China, still it will be asked, “Can she prevent it?” For such a question it needs but little thought to find an answer. It will be admitted that for any nation to attack Russia or invade it at any point of importance would be folly. And very slight consideration will show that to at- tack China with Russia defending her would be equal folly. v le Germany or Eng! d would slowly be bringing men and munitions in traus- through the ez canal and around Russia would be ding them by through Siberia by rail and short 4 ance where the 1 unavailable. When it t for the naval si Russia could at any time af pring supply her flee: directly from Vladi- ock, while the other pow would operate practically with far wes!- rope as their base. And even if Japan should join the cther powers, Rus- s would still be able to pour far mor » border into Chi could And the inestimabi. advantage of defending instead of attack- ing. To many of us this alliance of the Slav and the Mongol may appear a very sur- prising one. But, looking at it seriou: without any preconceived notions of th situation, is such an alliance noi perfectly natural?’ Is it not expedient to both par- ties? If an English fleet were to seize a port of Mexico, and some of our ships were to anchor in a port near by, with the entire acquiescence of Mexico and really for Mex- ico’s’ protection, would any sane person think that we were preparing to seize Mex- ican territory, and to seize it, too, in con- junction with England? With our amicable trade and political relations with Mexic; would it not be more reasonable to supp that we were going to defend her instead attack her? Well, Russia’s relations with China are exactly like ours with Mexico in many ways, except that they are in many ways even more intimate. It is hard to conceive of a diagnosis being more thoroughly illogical and unr on- able than that which has been made of the political situation in the east. And later cable reports are now confirm- the views I have tried to pre a we are told that the announceme ther: to be a “partition of Cni: little “‘premature that China h: been accustomed to grant Russia quartet for her fleet and similar favo and eyen that German. uate Kiao Chav when China h i the wrong she After Trade, Not Territory. But the events now transpiring on the i t are far from being utterly ning. Their meaning is that the powers are eager for the possession not of China's territory, but of her trade. 'T) international trade of China is new about $400,000,000 annually, and, with the intern velopment of the empire, will. increase Russians realize this fully from the Russian merchants y Novgorod, a few years ago, tne ‘The strenuous efforts made by Ger- many to gain possession of the markets of the Pacific. and the efforts which have been made to complete the Panama canal, visibly show that the economic struggle already commenced will end on the Pacitic ocean.” Here lies the real significance of what has occurred in China. It is for the priv- ilege of selling to and buying from this greet empire of 400,000,000 souls that the powers are struggling. We see this in Germany’s present demands on China, which contemplate the complete evacuation of all Chinese territory, provided China in return gives Germany merely some trade concession. Our Commercial Interests. In this economic struggle we in the United States, have interests that are of the greatest importance. The vast, rich, fertile lands of Siberia are being settled more and more every day. And more and more every day is the market for our products is Siberia growing. China and Japan are constantly importing from Eu- rope commodities which we could easily furnish. As it is now, 30 per cent of the imports into Vladivostock are from Gi many, 13 per cent from England and only 5 per cent from the United States. And in China and Japan it is the same way. In the contest now going on between the European powers in the east our inter- ests and sympathies should necessarily be with Russia, for by the seizure of Chi- nese ports and territory by other powers of Europe we have much to lose and nothing to gain. And while Russia's in- creasing strength in the east will give her a great advantage over us in supply- ing the orient with food stuffs and raw products, yet it will also open to us new markets for all of our manufactures and many of our raw products. Furthermore, Russia has always so far acted with China as her friend. Her relations with her sis- ter empire have been fair and honorable— much fairer in all probability than our re- lations with our sister country, Mexico, from whom not fifty years ago we seized a territory of immense extent. But Rus- sia has in no way encroached upon a weaker power, and her present masterful position in the east has been gained at no one else’s expense. It is well to remember a few of these facts when we discuss “Russia's latest grab.” ————__r-——__—_ Railroad Across Newfoundland. From the London Sketch. The railway line across Newfoundland has been completed, and was formally opened the other day. It is anticipated that it will be of use in shortening the sea pas- sage from England to Canada and vice versa, but this seems doubtful, as it is scarcely worth while to cross Newfound- land and take ship agath, now that steam- ers travel almost as fast as railway trains. The new railway traverses the island from Port-aux-Basques, on the west, to St. John’s, on the east coast, a distance of 550 miles. It will undoubtedly open up a good deal of the interior of the country, and en- able the immense mineral wealth to be utilized. Powerful steamers are being built to continue the service between Newfound- land and Canada; Indeed, one has already arrived from Glasgow, and is sald to be able to travel twenty knots an hour. WOMAN'S TROUBLES. SYNOPSIS OF A MOST IMPORTANT LECTURE, The Great Advance That is Being Made by Invention and Discovery for Easing the Burdens of Life and Making Women Better and Hap (New York Correspondence.) Mrs. Morgan J. Willard of New York recently rend a paper before the Woman's League, of which she is an officer, on the subject of “Woman's Greates: Troubles.” After enumerating theta in der, and intelligently treating the subjects «f Unrequited Affect ‘Lack of Appreciat “Loss of Friends,” pwerty,”” ete., she ued ut, unfortunately, the greatest tronble which ever comes into any woman's life ts loss of he Cther troubles me. Time metiows the grief which is so overwhelming at thi we close the eyes of our dying relatives or fi Poverty may be banished and the loat home a soctal standing regained, Even unrequited. tion may be Mved but brok®n health blicnt the life, undermines the spirit, destroys beauty embitters the ature, reins the Ife and, t be over makes death a boon, A sickly woman ts saddest wreck upon the shoals of life. She ix not ly miserable herself pften brings greater misery to those abot wing friends whose Ives are bound np in hers. Woman's greatest trouble is ill health!” After describing many of the diseases to watch women are tinned: “But thank Heaven tunately there is a_ relief lowest physical efndittcn. modern discovery have, worked for yours problem h is, in the of life, how to. produce specially subject the lecturer eva it Is a caus seful. There been discovered whi physical troubles, ¥ which certain}; meatiy T have seen them taken from a cou 2 of sickn and know » teday be: bey. 1 s by which they w highest abroad in the medical rica writies, in An warmest terms by sneh emt- Dr. Rankin and Bishop Wilson, "women as Mre. Annie and used It, and cann nume of this di h has dow for womanhood is Warner's Safe Cure, ed by any woman whe feels t friend upon whom she can depeml.” Jusion, Mrs, Willerd said nan is able to endu than man, but there ts no reason why she she be compelled to do so, She may be al dure pain, but she was not created for th pose. Her mission in Mfe is to diffuse jv gladness. Her face becomes a revelation heaven when wreatbed in happiness, tut gly a gtimpse of all that is miserable when depressad Ae But, far too often, her t Thoughtles careless. n responsitie f . but fortunate y e and availing herself of the best discoveries of science, there Is no reason why she should remain in a condition of unhappiness When there is certain relief near at hand.” rd it too bighly an nud of os, exercising ‘The lecture made a deep impression upon the ladies of the League who beard it, and there was much discussion upon it after the session closed It seemed to be the general sentin that w of the present day are beginning to see how ne less were the troubles which women formerly «n- dured, and how easily they can be avoided at the present time by exercising intelligent care. The Price of His Hei From the Atlanta Constitution. A Georgia farmer so pleased a patent medicine firm with a certificate he had given as to the merits of the particular restrum that they offered to have his pic- ture painted; with the certificate, on the town hall. Tre farmer was tickled with the idea, and vegularly sat to the artist until the latter had transferred his rugged linea- ments to the weather boarding of the me prominent building in the town. The pic- ture was full length. Shortly afterward a cyclone strolled by end scattered the tewn hall to the four corners of the country. People in different localities picked up s Uons of the fermer’s portrait, which h: been blown their way, and one man, know- ing how the farmer deplored the disaster, wrcte him as follows: “I'm sorry the cy- clone blowed yer pictur’ so far, but I've got good news fer you: Bill Jinkins found yer left leg, Mart Wilkins is got a hunk o° yer back, Dan Jones found yer right arm, an’ I undefstan’ that Sister Molly Brown is got tother arm, likewise yer right leg. All the pieces I seen fit tergether good What I wants ter know row is, how much will you give fer yer head? ——— Half Peas. From the St. Joseph Herald. At the gathering of the retail grocers last Tuesday night reminiscences were ex: changed and many were the tales whi the grocers told on each other. One grocer, who now enjoys the distinction of being the leading grocer in his section of the city, tells a tale on himself which bears re- peating. It happened when he was new tn the busi- ness. One day a spice salesman, repre- senting an eastern firm, called on him. The grocer said he didn’t need anything in his line. That was the natural thing to say, however, and it didn’t worry the sales- man a bit. He talked on in the hope -of getting an order. Said he: “Where do buy your now “Tpuy of & ae Cor ee NOT “Oh, I wouldn't. buy their pepper; it's balf peas.” - “<4, you are mistaken there; they do not adulterate anything. That's the way with you n; you are always running down your competitors.” ~ “I don’t care what you say, I'm willing ti wager that S. & Co.'s pepper is half peas.” “Very well, 'll bet you a dollar it isn't.” The money was put up, whereupon the traveling man proceeded to prove the cor- rectness 0} assertion. was easily done. Taking a pencil ke wrote p-e-p-p-e-r “Halt p's,” he 2