Evening Star Newspaper, November 21, 1896, Page 14

ou i _ THE “EVENINGS STAR, SATURDAY, NOVEMBER, 21, 1896-24. PAGES. “The al retice that winter Is due,” said the svj dent of one of the gov- ernment depa ‘arrived a trifle ear- | ly this year, and immediately the wooden storm steps were hauled out from the bi nd qnents. for ire new being put in readine: With the notice came a the private tip we may have a snow storm by Tha iving day. This tip is not official, heweve though it was given out by the authority of one of the weather prognosticators of the weather bureau. If we take the r of the past thirte: years av a gui’ i safe thing to say that there will be some real winter weather by the e:d of November, though it may not be for wore than three or four days Later on the weather will moderate, and what is cailed bad weather will not set in this year, it is said, until the week be- fore Christmas, during the shopping sea- son, probably.”* Ce ee ee “The man with the arithmetical puzzle got in our department a few mornings ago,” remarked a clerk whose ideas run toward problems, “and in less than two days there were a number engaged in try- ing to unravel it. Though it may not be @ new one it was new to many of us and a rather difficult one. The proposition is to place og 1, 2, 3, 4,5, 6, 7, 8 and 9 by ha way to make them add up iv. The figures can be taken in any way, though eacl can be used but once. For ¢xam the 3 and 4 can be joined, stetting one with 34. The puzz’ is to make combinations with the other figures t the sum total will be an even 10 jed it hundreds of é fee yt sueceeded in having them a: g the 1 and 3 asa as another fraction, t to 2-3, I got t is uses each fig- ure but ¢ s I understand the puz- zle, fraci it is not s the puzzle may seem i : own satis- hundreds have proved to th are still proving “The old-fashiored molasses is rapidly disappearing as an article of commerce,” said a prominent grocer, “and in its place have come a number of strups, which are more costly and by no means as satisfac- tory, especially to the little ones, who de- light, as we did when we were young, in having ‘‘lasses on their bread.” Most of the molasses goes into the distilleries, where it is made into rum, for which, not- withstanding the efforts of our temperance | the demand is constantly on the se, especially in the New England worke iner states and for the export trade. The reg- | ular drinker cf rum will take no other liquor in its place if he can help it. It seems to reach the spot more directly than any other dram. The darker brown su- gars hav appeared, and they are never I urn, owing to the meth- ods of boiling and the manufacture. Gran- ulated s ar is of the ‘ition as far echarine qv prned, as loaf, cut loaf, ¢ and crushed, and fers from them only in that its crystals do not cohere. This is heca' it is constantly stirred ¢ g the process of crystalliza- tion. The lighter brown sugars taste | sweeter than the white, for the reason that there is ft in them. ifficulty these days sugars, which are e in putting up es and similar uses. As they rown sugar any more, it may be wei! for them to remem- ber that they can simulate brown sugar by adding a tablespoonfl of molasses to each quarter of a pound of the white granulated sugars. This combination does as well in all household receipts that call for brown sugar as the article itself, and, besides, it saves them a great deal of hunting for brown sugar, which, as said before, has disappeared from the market.” eR oe “T had rather a novel experience in the matter of gathering tables showing the rise and setting of the sun, the changes of the moon, high and low tides, &c.," said a publisher, “last year, but I am fixed for this year. In my experience as publisher I had printed about almost everything that I thought could be printed. Finally, an ad- vertising concern wanted me to get out an alma copy for the almanac, itself_that is, 3 always preferred sweet pickl except the almanac the tables. I supposed I would have no difficulty in getting them, but I soon found out that I was mistaken. My desire was to get the tables correct, and to have them prepared in an authori- interviewing some of Washington di tative the that way. After experts in they were all any Jw work. Hy one of them corsented to do it, 1 he did, charg- ing m2 $00 for the calculations—$25 for each month. work done this year, and came here for I found lined to take F that purpose, but I learned that all the cal- | culations for the various patent medicine | and many other almanacs are made by a blind man in Pittsburg, Pa., an amateur mathematician and astronomer of consid- erable local reputation. I sent for tables, ind have received them. He charged me exactly 36, or 50 cents for each month. I understand t the actual work is done by children, who write from his dicta- tion. He tells me that he has supplied the same tables for about one hundred differ- ent almanacs for 1807.” x oe Oe eK “The sudden warm spell of a couple of weeks since played sid havoc with the stcek of sweet cider held in this city,” id a dealer. “As is generally known, nine-tentrs of the sweet cider sold in this city comes from New York state and Con- necticut. One of the big cider concerns had about 1,000 barrels stored here to sup- ply the local demand. The trade opencd up very lively, and for a couple of weeks sweet cider signs appeared in every one of the grocery and many other stores. The sudden warm spll followed, and in less than a week the sweet cider was sweet no more and had become hard. In other words, it worked. There is a demand for herd cider, of course, but it is very small in comparison to that of sweet cider, for the drinker of hard cider can, on a pinch, get along with plain beer or whisky. The drinker of sweet cider, on the other band, wants not Of course, the stock is not en lost, for in six or eight months, it will be marketable as vinegar. The result therefore, there is but little r on sale, though the sup- > sufficient.” bs - * KOR K * "There are about seven and a_ half chances out of ten that the weather in Washington on the 4th ef March next will be unpleasant, remarked a gentleman who has given considerable attention to the subject of changing Inauguration day from March 4 to April 30, or some other day later in the spring. “Though the change has been regularly pressed on Coagress, but little or no encouragement has been received that there ts any likelihood of a change being made. This is unjust to the People of Washington and to every one | else who comes here to assist in the inau- guration. The coming inauguration will, I think, draw very large crowds here, and I am sorry that the chances for good weather are not good. Maj. McKinley has always played in good luck, and he may pull through in this case, but the chances nac for tnem. They furnished all the | I am about having a similar | the ; at vs W are all against fair weather. Recently I | looked over the back numbers of The Star since it was first printed. and the papers printed here for twenty-five years before ‘The Star, to see the exact weather furnish- ed for the 4th of March. Incidentally, I | looked up the weather for the two days | prior and one or two after the 4th of March. In all my investigations ran over seventy-one years. I then calculated the | chances for the coming inauguration, and, while they are not as solidly in favor of | bad weather, they lean that way in the | proportion of 7% to 10. What are known as gamblers’ chances, therefore, are all in favor of bad weather. Our older citizens remember the most delightful weather dur- ing the first week of March, Buchanan's, ene of Lincoln's, and one of President nd's inaugurations, but they also re- | ™ember Grant's and Garfield's, which gave every one such a shiver.” xX Kk A pretty, gay young Washirgton widow tes more or less comments by the | fulness of her disposition, which is so | marked that some of her friends have oc- | casionally taken her to task for forgetting him so soon, a suggestion she indignantly den however. But it remained for a bright woman, who had known her for years,-to cap the climax of rebuke, which | She did rot long since, thusly: “My dear, there are two classes of widows—the be- reaved and the relieved, and, I declare, I almost think you belong to the latter.” ‘The widow thought the mot so good that she couldn't. get angry, and she told it herself. { iC * km Ok Ok ‘Congress will be called upon during the coming session,” remarked a member of the House committee on military affairs, “to consider the question of supplying bi- cycles to certain arms of the military serv- ice of the army. The report of General Miles, in very strong language, urges the adoption of the bicycle for infantry organi- zations. Of course, he does not desire that all the infantry shall ride bicycles, but he does favor that ‘there shall be bicycle squads. A number of the infantry organi- | zations in the far west have been practic- j Ing on the wheel for several months, some | of the practice rides having covered long | distances. The innovation has been found to work well, and great expectations are indulged in as to the future. So far the iers have ridden wheels purchased by rown funds. It is intended that there all be a bicycle squad at each fort or garrison, to consist of at least ten men. ‘There is a second proposition that the gov- | ernment shall manufacture its own bicycles | at the armories where the arms are made, | though it may be that the experiment will | not be carried out to that extent, at least | for the present.” | x Ok KOK OK The dairy lurch places in the nelghbor- | hood of the various departments of the government present an interesting and live- ly scene during the lunch hour, or, to speak more properly, half hour, each day, for | the department clerk is allowed but half an | hour for lunch. It is at these places that | the clerks meet to exchange gossip and to talk over things of mutual interest. The average department clerk is very much exercised just now over the rumors and opinions as to the composition of the next capinet. There is hardly a day at these lunch places when cabinet slates are not arranged and disarranged in all sort of ways. Should the President-elect hear all the good points, as well as bad points, discussed, as public men are from time to time mentioned as probable cabinet officers, he would prob- ably have more difficulty in deciding on | the personnel of his cabinet than he al- ready jas, or at least is supposed to have. As far ‘as department clerks are con- erned, the general drift of their opinion | i+ that new men for the heads of the de- | partments are more satisfactory, as a rule, than those who have previously held cab- inet places, or who have well-set opinions in consequence of long congzessional ex- perience. The idea prevails among the clerks that a cabinet officer who comes into a department loaded to the guards with | theories, reforms or “improvements,” as they are apt to call them, is a nuisance, {and an annoyance to clerks as well as an | injury to the business of the department. | ‘They would prefer that the new heads | should come from the business or profes- | sional classes rather than from the political | or congressional, for there is a well-ground- | ed opinion that an ex-Congressman, be he ' Senator or Representative, causes much |tnore trouble than a selection from any | other class. * KOK KOK ‘The new woman may or may not be re- sponsible for the fact that her girlhood is no longer considered at an end when she reaches the age of one score, but I heard one of her species claiming this honor in a very excited discussion the other day. “Every one knows,” she asserted, “that in times gone by, if a woman was not mar- | rled and settled by the time she was twen- ty, she was no longer on the list of eligi- bles for the gayeties of the younger set, but was relegated to the row of married dames or passe maidens. The books of the day married off their heroines at a tender age, Bulwer especially giving butterfly brides of sixteen into the arms of misanthropic heroes, and girls came out of school with minds and bodies half fledged and under- took the burdens of Hfe with so little un- derstanding of their obligations that of necessity the hysterical, silly type of femi- ninity prevailed. | “But we have changed all that,” she went on, triumphantly. “Nowadays, the, girls don’t come out till between eighteen and twenty, after a beautiful girlhood filled with healthy sports and instruction of the highest grades. She has assimilated with her lessons other things besides the neces- sity of sentimental and romantic early marriages, and when she makes her debut it is with the intention of being gay and of exercising the capabilities for natural hap- piness with which she has been endowed. As a consequence, girls are girls in the modern dictum as long as they choose to be so, and the dread term ‘old maid’ is never applied under thirty, and not then unless the victim wills it. Is not that a cause for thankfulness far above the suf- frage privilege?” * eK KOK “apples, apples, apples,” is the cry of the season. Apples for indigestion, apples for the complexion, apples for insomnia, and ever more apples for everything. One man compiains that after paying a big doctor's fee for advice concerning sleeplessness, his physician as a finality said, “There is no better remedy for your complaint than eat- ing a good juicy apple just before retiring. It is light, easily digested, and creates just the amount of heat in your stomach nec- essary to bring the blood from the brain and so promote restfulness in that busy organ.” girl complexion has been a source ef worry for months has the same experience to relate. “Use this lotion and these pills," says Esculapius, “but by no means omit eating a large apple three times a day, the malic acid contained in them is the best remedy for your trouble, and na- {ture presents it in a most agreeable pill form.” At Boston dinrer tables the apple is one of the accepted forms of decoration, and several small cut glass dishes of ‘rosy- cheeked health producers are used to offset the mound of flowers in the center, and with it form the only spectacular adjuncts to the feast. Very pretty, too, they look, carrying back the fancy of the satlated diner-out to the time when an apple, fra- grant, juicy, probably purloined from a for- bidden orchard, formed the summum | bonum of his existence. Stirring his stumps.—Harper’s Bazar. A WESTERN RAILROAD WASH- a . OUT... On St. Patrick’s day, 1904, five-through trains, bound both to the eastward and westward of the Oregon Short Line of the Union Pacific, were tied up at Glenn’s Fer- ry, Idaho. They had heen caught between two serious washouts, one at Pocatello and tthe other at Indian Creek. three days be- fore, and had to wait at Glenn’s Ferry for track repairs along the line before they could proceed. Glenn’s Ferry is a bleak little railroad and sheepherders’ town of three or four hundred inhabitants, situate on a sagebrush bluff overlooking the un- speakably dark and dreary Snake river. The five stalled trains carried about sit hundred passengers of as miscellaneous a character as could be gotten together at a carefully selected congress of types, There were emigrants and millionaires; soldiers on the move; dainty women in palace cars and women bound for Creede and Cripple Creek in day coaches; miners who Killed time during the wait in shooting magpies circling over the Snake river; Shoshone Indians traveling to the limits of their reservation; well-behaved and quiet people, noisy and tumultuous people. But all were stuck alike, and they made the best of it. Lines of social demarcation were for the time erased. All hands mingled easily on the little station platform and in the little station waiting room. The supply of food on the dining cars gave out the first day of the hitch, and everybody was fed, and well fed, too, in the station eating room. ‘They sat down at the tables in relays, and patiently awaited their turns. The bank president and the itinerant Chinese laun- dryman breakfasted side by side; the army Paymaster and the shaggy earth-delver dined together in peace and amity; the Creede-bound ladies enjoyed their suppers at the same tables with San Francisco gentlewomen, Lound for the Riviera. The railroad employes and their wives were to give ¢ dance at the little town hall on St. Patrick’s night. There was an inexpressibly bjd piano in the hall, upon which a railroail fireman’s wife knew how to drum out darice music, but there was no fiddle or fiddler, and this worried the or- ganizers of the dance. The switchman who had been customarily employed to fiddle for them had been swittched to another di- vision. In a quandary, the dance commit- tee toured the trains and station, to ascer- tain if any of the stalled passengers hap- pened to be carrying a violin and was capable of producing music on it. In ene of the sleeping cars they came across an artistic looking man, with very long hair, a seraphic, oleaginous counte- nance, and exceedingly baggy clothes, ‘They were looking for a fiddler, they suid. Did he know of any on the train? Well, he didn’t know (in outrageously bad English); he ployed a Mitle himself once in a while, and had rather a fair fiddle with him. The long-haired man accented the “fiddle” rather curiously. But the railroad men were overjoyed. Would he play for them to dance with their wives and sweethearts? Certainly! Did he know dance music? Well, some. All of the stalled passengers were in- vited to the dance, and they all went. A good many of them could not get in. It Was an odd kind of affair, made pictur- esque not only by the presence of the mixed congregation of travelers, but by the leavening of bad-looking sheep herders, who were in reality first-rate fellows if they did find it unnecessary to unstrap their guns while Gancing with the nice- looking railroad girls. The baggily-clothed fiddler turned up in good time. The pianiste was waiting for him. So was the railroad dance commit- tee, one of the members of which slipped $8 in one-dollar bills Into the fiddler’s hand as payment in advance for the evening's work. It was smilingly accepted. The dance began. The fireman’s wife who played the piano produced an old be- thumbed violin and piano tune book, and turned to the lancers. She told the fiddler. at the end of the first dance, that he did pretty well, only he went too fast. Then there was a waltz. The fiddler was in- formed by his accompanist that he was getting along finely, and everybody tn the room began to prick up his ears at the sweetness of the violin music, although the dances were common and tawdry enough. Another waltz—the “Beautiful Blue Dan- ube.” All of the dancers on the floor stopped dead at the first bar, and the travel- ers with cultivated musical ears moved close to the plano. The planiste ceased. She wished to listen. The violin music was miraculous. The player swayed from side to side as he phrased. He appeared to be oblivious of his surroundings. He Impro- vised variations of inspiring tenderness. He out-Straussed Strauss. His violin sang, throbbed with passion. When the last note died away, the pecple in the hall seemed to be in a dream. All but one. “Monsieur Ysaye,” said “Charley” Fair, the son of the late United States Senator Fair, stepping from the throng, ‘won't you play that lively, rattley thing you gave us at the Bohemian Club in San Fran- cisco the other night? It’s been running in my_head ever since.” M. Ysaye played Berlioz’s “Pizzicatto” as he perhaps never played it before. eS OPEN TO SUSPICION. An Incident That Has Recurred With Significant Frequence. said,the publisher, “we'd like a ‘Thanksgiving story. But it’! have to be on somewhat different lines this year.” “T've got the very thing you need,” re- plie€ the man with manuscript in the side pocket of his coat. I thought you'd be pleased when I started for your office this morning: and now I know It.” g “You've struck out regardless of the con- ventional lines, have you?” “That's it exactly. Here's the scheme. The family is all assembled at dinner on Thanksgiving day.” ‘M'yes. And there is a vacant chair at the tabl “How did you guess it?” “And the old gentleman sighs as he thinks of the son who is not there to share the holiday repast.” “Exactly!” “And the childrer krow what he is think- ing about, and his wife would like to speak a word of comfort; but they have all been fcrbidden to mention the absent son’s name.” “You are a mind reader!”” “Suddenly the door bursts open, and a man with whiskers cries ‘Father,’ and the old gentleman embraces him and says ‘My son,’ and that’s the end of the story. “There isn’t much use of your reading it. There may be a few differences in detail, but the main incidents are as you have re- lated them.” “I'm afraid I'd better not publish the story. I don’t mean to say a word against its artistic merit. But you have to cun- sider the prejudices of the reader.” “But there isn’t anything in it that isn’t calculated to please.” “I don’t know about that. Year after year that son has been turning up in the same opportune manner. This is a cold and suspicious age, ard if we let him do it any more I'm afraid the public will begin to think that he simply comes home when he knows the family is going to have tur- key for dinner.” ee A COLOSSAL TRIBUTE. The Original Idea of a Husband Who Wished to Behave Handsomely. He had not been in Washington very long, but he lived in a way that soon com- manded the interest which a lavish display of wealth is sure to win; and a circle of friends speedily gathered about them, who learned to forgive their shortcomings in etiquette because of the generous sincerity of their natures. “There ain't any good of us givin’ teas and things,” he said, bluntly, to one of his more intimate associates. Wwe don’t en- joy ’em. Susan’s tried ’em, “and they’re all right in thelr way, but they don’t amount to anything after you get ‘em over with.” “Still, it’s only natural that your wife should like to attract some attention in the world. That's only a normal feminine characteristic.” “I know it. And I mean that she shall attract attention. But it’s business that we're good in, and not society. She likes business just as much as I do. She showed that when she married me. I didn’t have a dollar. I was prospecting for a mine, and I hadn’t struck anything that looked like metal, but I knew it was there. I met her at a huskin’ bee. It was one of these light and frolicsome occasions where a fel- ler was privileged to kiss a girl every time he found a red ear. It was a new game out there. When I proposed to her she sald she knew I was poor; but she guessed a man that had enterprise enough to bring his own red ears of corn with him in his overcoat pocket, s6’s not to take any charges had enterprise’ and gumption enough to cash in a few chips when it came _tg settlin’ up most any kind of a game. And when the mine began to pay out oie so pure that it could be made Into" feaspdons as it-came out of the ground, she was a heap more interested !n findin'|{avestments for the money than she was in buyin’ Paris bonnets; although no- body could ever say that she slighted a friend when it was the genuine article. She's -worthy of a better monument than a cenfer-piece on a dinner table, and of more fame than a paragraph in the so- ciety column. And I’m the chap that’s goin’ to see that she gets 'em.” d nome, lo you propose to do—found a , ‘Founding a Mbrary’s only a little of it. I've Sesithe ground, and I’ve got the plans, and I’m going to found a town. It’s got the location and I’ve got the capital and energy. You know this place up in the northwest called Minneapolis?” EOF course.” ‘Well, I always thought that when that town was named somebody had paid a compliment worth while. I’ve no doubt that Minnie is a nice girl, and I haven't the least thing against her personally; but I’m going to have a town named Susanap- olis that'll make her turn pale with envy.” ——— AN ILL-CHOSEN ADAGE. An Avowal Not Calculated to Smooth the Troubled Waters, It really was not Mr, Meekton’s fault that there was not peace in the family. He had done his best. After finding that silence on his part had a tendency to irri- tate his wife, who believed that her re- marks were not receiving their due meas- ure of attenticn, he agreed with every sug- gestion that she offered. He was bound to please if there was any way of accomplish- Ing it. But he was a bad actor, and he Overdid it, “So,” she exclaimed, “you've been sitting there all this time saying ‘yes’ to every- thing I. suggested, simply because you wanted to keep me good-natured?” “I'm sure, Henrietta, that’s an entir ly laudable ambition on my part, is it not tigdt,shows an inanély innocuous dispost- Mr. Meekton edged over toward the dic- tlonary and said nothing. ‘I do wish you'd exhibit some spirit!” she exclaimed in a tone of mingled fierce- ness and hopelessness. “I'd be very glad to, the gentlest of voices, you in the slightest. The only difficulty is that I'd be sure to select some occasion when you were not in a mood for spirit. And you know it would be disappointing to go to the trouble of showing spirit and discover that, after all, the effort was wasted and IJ had failed to please. “There's a bold, uncompromising nature for you,” she exclaimed, looking straight through him into space.’ There's ihe un- flinching fortitude that makes a hero com bined with the Intellectual resource chat constitutees the born statesman.” “I—I presume,” said Mr. Meekton, “That you are joking row.” “I certainly was rot in earnest.” “I thought you were joking. Ha, ha!” She glared at him for a moment and re- marked: “There fs one thing that always has been and always will be a mystery to me.” “What is it?” “How you ever got up the courage to Propose to me.” “I suppose, Henrietta,” he answered, af- ter some reflection, “that it was just the old story.” “What old story?” “Fools-rush in where angels fear to rea was the reply, in “if is would oblige ——_—__. jon's Views About Hawall. Capt. Nathan Appleton of Boston, form- erly United States minister to Santo Do- mingo, thinks that while it may be safe to let the Hawaiian republic (which he has just visited) go on for a while, eventually the United States must annex it and give it sdme such status as the District of Co- lumbia hds. The prime needs of the islands are the completion of the Panama cartal and a cable to the United States. “Mean- while, and awaiting some future develop- ments,. this is certainly a weil-governed and seewingly happy and prosperous re- publie*fh miniature. Speak'ng of it and President Dole, I have heard*that the late Miss Kate Fiel] called tim “He [2al pr dent’ of amAdeal renutilic.’ Bnd so, of a truth, {t4s:4n ideal repablic, and might go ‘om- indefinitely if it were situated in seme out-of-the-way’ art of tne world. But it is right ih the path af commorce between some of the great nations, ani-we know what ‘the greed and rapacity of nations care for when it seems for their own ‘in- terest to stretch out a hani and say, ‘We want more room, and it fs our destiny.’ It is the duty of this country not to let Ha- wali pass from its control.” —— Long Life for House Palms. From the New York Times. As the winter hopsekeeping is beginning to be set up the chatelaine looks to her greenery. The florist will tell you that the average life of the house palm, even the robust Lantanta, is about seven years, but there are many women who proudly dis- play splendid growths they have owned ten and a dozen years. “All a palm needs,” says one of these women, “is intelligent care. To begin with, they should never he suddenly chilled. Many palm owners per- mit the maids to open the window directly on the plants every day all winter and wonder long before spring why they have drooped and rusted, if not died outright. They need sn even, warm temperature, with plenty of sunlight and clear water given regularly. They should stand near a sunny window, but not where draughts will strike them. Twice a week I fill the jar, from the earth to the brim, with water, and this inch of water is sufficient moisture for the roots. Once a week, with equal regularity, I spray the leaves. Unless at- tacked by some insect, palms thus looked after are sure to do well. If worms come, a florist’s aid must be sought. The Dude and Acrobat as Riva’ From Fllegende Blatter. eEQtELAIZ Iv. DEVISED BY WOMAN'S wit Mr. Corntossel had developed an unfortu- nate liking for urban allurements, as rep- resented by the hotel in the village. His | wife noticed it, and with a great deal of regret, and one morning she said: “Josiar, I've been a-readin’ in the weekly Paper about how women don’t do ez much ez they'd orter ter make home happy.” “Ye've been readin’ su’thin’ thet’s clus ter bein’ the truth,” he replied, rather shortly; for it is a solemn fact that the more jovial a man,is along about 12 or 1 o'clock In the morning, the more morose he is likely to be in the bosom of his family. “I’ve made up my mind ter do more ter make the place comfortable.” “Ye ain’t goin’ ter start in and foller out no more o' them receipts, are ye?” “No. I ain't got the confidence in ‘em thet I useter have. I've tried tidies, an’ Vve tried makin’ armchairs out o’ flour bar'ls, an‘ they didn’t seem ter work. Men’s ideas of comfort ain't the same ez wo- men’s. Jes’ you wait tell ye git home ter- night. That her words had inspired him with curiosity was evident from the fact that he came back from his work a great deal earlier than usual. As he entered the din- ing room he jumped in astonishment, and exclaimed “Whut under the canopy is a-goin’ on?” ‘Tain’t exackly my idea of elegance an’ comfort,” she remarked, “but I ain't set- Un’. up my opinions agin yours. It's whut you seem ter fancy, an’ I don’t see no use o” yer walkin’ ter town fur sech luxuries ez these.” Ske had strewed the floor with sawdust and had arranged some boards across two barrels at one side of the room. Back of the boards was a large louking glass, which she kad brought down from the spare bed room, and on top was a keg of hard cider with the spigot ready to respond to any demand that might occur A number of bottles and cigar boxes were ranged against the wall and some shallow boxes with sawdust in them occupied conspicu- ous places on the floor. “Don’t ye think it’s fine?” she inquired ingenuously. “Ef ye want somethin’ ter eat, here’s crackers an’ cheese on the counter. I knowed it wouldn’t be com- plete wethout some free lunch. Termor- row I expect ter hev some smoked sausage. I had ter go slow: at fust; but I'll keep addin’ bere an’ there.” “Mandy,” he said hoarse! uble myself, ef I wus you.” “I don’t wanter leav it half done,” she persisted. “I tuk the trouble ter go ter the hotel an’ peek through the window, so's ter study your tastes. An’ I'm a-goin’ ter gratify ’em ef it’s in my power. I'll even go so fur ez ter learn ter drop a swear- word here an’ there, ef it'll make things scem more companionable.” ly. ye don’t need ter carry it no Ye've done wonders. All I ask is thet ye'll lend a hand an’ help me clear out this mess, an’ ef ye'll agree ter say no more about the past I'll undertake not ter give ve no occasion fur remarks in the ‘uture.” t “I wouldn't —__ COLLIDED AT THE FINISH. A Bookmaker’s Odds on a Man's Not Catching a Train. The races were over and the crowd was making its wey toward the train. ‘There was a group of bookmakers in the push; men who like Jack Smiley, would bet on anything. They were quietly discussing the sport of the day and explaining how it was Declare showed such a rev2rsal in form in his last race with Marshall. Two hundred yards away, the Baltimore spe- cial was pushing out. Suddenly from the rear a yourg man came running. “He's after that train,” remarked one of the bcokles. “It's 100 to 1 he don’t catch it,” replied the handler of the long green. The train slowed down a trifle, and the first bookie said: “No, the odds are less than that; I'll bet 25 to 1 he don’t make it.” “I'll go you for a V,” put in a@ little fat fellow. “It’s a Le The train continued to slow up, and the runner gained rapidly. “The odds are now about 5 to 1 he don’t connect,” said one of the crowd. “What are you talking about,” said a big good-natured fellow, whom all betters know. “It’s an even money bet. “Look, look,” cried the first bookie. “Hes an odds-on favorite now. to swing on.” Sure enough the runner had caugat up with the train, and was about to swing on the piatform, when something occurred that threw the bookies into convulsio.s. Just as the runner was in the act of getting on the train a man emerged from the rear door and jumped off. He col- lided with the runner and the two mixed it up in the sand between the tracks while the train sped on. The bookies were not near enough to hear the conversation that passed between the two, but all sorts of wagers were of- fered as to the talk they had. ee ee OPTICAL ILLUSION. See, he is about AN The Spectacle That Made a Doser Rub His Eyes. Perhaps it was only the warm alr that made him go to sleep in the billard room of one of Washington's prominent hotels. It was not a profound slumber; merely a doze. Now and then he opened his eyes and gazed admirirgly at a round-the-table play and exclaimed: “Splendid! splendid! Seems like people can train things to do just what they want nowadays.” As his head sank on his chest, the big chrysanthemum he wore on his coat tick- led his rose. He brushed at it with his half-open hand and it fell to the floor. Gazing at it with a placid expression, he murmured: ‘ou just stay there and I'li come and get you in a little while.” But a bell boy with an eye for beauty picked up the chrysan flower while its owner slept. A man with a skye terrier came into the place and the dog sat down near where the flower had been. Its own- er got into conversation and the dog curl- €d itself up and patiently waited his mas- ter’s pleasure. The sleepy man awakened just as the dog’s owner whistled for him. ‘As the skye terrier responded, the drowsy man in the chair jumped to his feet and rubbed his eyes. “Well, I'm everlastingly jingoed:” he ex- claimed. “I know that we're living in an age of marvels and that things can be made to do just about what you want them to if you know how. But I'm blest if I wouldn't like to know more about the man that hypnctized my chrysanthemum.” sage IT WAS UNEXPECTED. Result of a Simple Little Question at 2 Politienl Gathering. One of the newly elected Congressmen Was in Washington the other day, and in the course of his remarks he told a story cn himself which he permitted to be printed on condition that his identity be concealed. | At least, until he could come to Washing- ton in person as a full-fledged member and take care of his reputation. “The corvention that nominated me,” he sald, “had about all it could do to do it, not So much because I wasn't good enough, but because all of my competitors were such superior timber that it was a diticult matter to decide which to take, and it was’} 3 o'clock in the morning when I got votes enough to settle the business and give me qthe prize. Shortly after that a spell- binder friend of mine was making an orien- tal splendor speech for me off up in the farming section, that might have been pasted on a barn as a circus bill. ‘My friends,’ he said, in his most persuasive way, ‘our opponents are reportilig that the noble candidate under whose magnificent banner we are enlisted in the cause of right and for the perpetuity of the palladium of our Iberties was pulling wires in the con- vention looking to the nomination of him- self. Wellow citizens, I want to brand that statement as an infamous iie and hurl the foul slander down the polluted throat of the traducer of innocence and virtue. Why, gentlemen, I was present at that convention, and I know our candidate was not there. No, friends and fellow citizens, he was not seekir, the honor thrust upon him, but.at the very moment it came to him he was in a cornfield” “That was where he missed it,” laughed the member-elect. “Some chap in the crowd remembered that the nomination was at 3 o'clock in the morning. and just wh my man was not expecting anything of the sort this fellow sang out, “Whose corn- field was it? and it spoiled the speech, turned the laugh on my spellbinder and lost me the vote of the entire precinct.” “Where were you really at the inquired a listener. “Sound asleep, I suppose. That's where I usually am at 3 o'clock in the morung.” “Whoop la, wait till you've been in the national capital awhile,” shouted all the group at once, and the new member as- sumed the air of a saint and mariyr. > A READY EXPLANATION. ime?” It Took Quick Thinking, but It Ar- rived en Demand. A Washington man ts accustomed to using what he considers a very choice pro- duct of the distiller’s art. His preference for the liquor in question has been ap- proved by a number of connoisseurs in such matters, and he began to suspect that a colored man in his employ had added his indorsement in a manner tacit, but sincere. The compliment was a high one; for the colored man has lorg been employed in the culinary department, and he had a sense of smell and a keenness of taste which many a gourmet might envy. The demi- john which contained the liquor emptied with such surprising rapidity that its pro- prietor concluded to adopt radical meas- ures. In the absence of direct. proof, he decided to try strategy. He allowed the demijohn to become empty, and, instead of filling it again, put the liquor in bottles i his cupboard, and labeled them “poison. The word was printed in heavy ters, and a skull and er added, of a size calcul pression on the most stolid. eye on the cu and on he came home from the theater, he caught the colored servant in the act. Seizing the bottle in mock terror, the employer €x- claimed “Great heavens! Do you know what you are doing? Don’t you see that what that bottle contains is marked poison? The colored man held it off and looked at it. Then he smelled it, and, with a look of melancholy, replied: “"Tain’ poison, suh. I's done been fooled “How you knew it was poison or not?’ “Bors, it wus dis-a-way. F'um de way yoh acted "bout dat demijohn in de cellar, I done thought yoh had yoh s’pisions ob me, an’ it made me melancholy, foh sho’. I's been tryin’ foh mos’ two weeks now ter commit suicide out’n dat bottle!” > E APR RANCE. r Novel Reader Wan Not So Unsophisticated as She Looked. Ther> was a young woman with a musical ear sitting in a corner of the cable car. Several times she looked up with curious surprise as the conductor rang the bell to register fares. The bell did not always sound the same. Sometimes it had a dull, clanking tone, and every now and then it cume out sharp and clear, several noves higher in the scale. She was a demure lit- tle crexture with blonde frizzes, and she became so interested in the variations play- ed on the bell that she quite negiected the paper-covered novel which lay in her lap— a novel whicn she was evidently not read- ing for the first time, for she had opeued it at random and when she had dropped it to listen to the bell she never troubled herself to find the place. But in Ue course of time she reached a more interesting portion of the work. There were thirgs that she apparently desired to remember, for she took a lead pencil t a small bag and began io mark passag! here and there. The old gentleman with white side whis kers who sat opposite her hoped that it was. a proper book for a young Woman to read, and the angular woman, who was sume- what fiurried owing to an unsuccessful ef- fort to pass an out-of-date soda waier tick- et for car fare, was sure that it wasn't. She rode almost to the end of the line. Just before the car finally stopped she took vut a note book. The conductor happened to come to the front of the car and he glanced at what she wrote. It was the number of his car. As she walked toward the railway office he opened the coor that looked out on the front platform, and said to the motorman: “It's all up, Jim.” told you somebody would notice the difference in the sound of these two bells. Somebody was bound to wonder about it and discover that you weren't ringing up all the fares in the right place. The conductor’s face was very pale and his meuth was drawn at the corners. It was one of the every-day tragedies of life: : temptation, discovery and regret that came too late. ‘The girl with blonde frizzes was a Pink- erton detective. ee HER AMERICAN SPIRIT. A Washington Girl Who Has a Great Head on Her Pretty Shoulders. She's a Washington girl, and she's pretty. But it was a work of supererdgation to add that last remark. If anybody ever saw a homely Washing- ton girl, he discreetly maintained such silerce on the subject that to all intents and purposes n» such girl ever existed! Now, this charming young woman, unlike some of our charming young Washington women, is thoroughly American, which her mother isn’t, and the result is that there is scmewhat of an emotional clash now and then. That is to say, the daughter receives at- tention from some men whom the mother doesn’t approve of. One particularly. He is from the west, and he has a whole barrelful of money, and getting several move fast. But he is “in trade.” Oh, horrors! “Of course, dear,” said the pretty girl's mother, only last week; “of cours Blank is a very excellent young mai he has money, but you know he is in trade, and if you marry him you cannot go into society. Now, why don’t you throw him over and accept the diplomat who is your slave? He is so charming, of such a great family, and he is a favorite in our very best society.” “That's all right, mamma,” replied the young woman, “but I like the other man. As for the trade part, you needn't worry about that. George is in politics on the side, and it won't be ten years until he gces abroad as ambassador to some of those effete old monarchies, and with his pull and his purse we can have a string of ordinary diplomats at our heels like a tail to a Kite.” Since which announcement the maternal ancestor hasn't had as much to say, though she may still be thinking. What's in a Nam From Harper's Mistress (to iy jaged laundress)— “And now what shall we call you?” Laundress—Well, mum, me name i Bertha, but me friends all calls me Birdie. ‘ed you tamper with it, whether | You may have what thou- de Ne sands visit Europe for yearly, that is the natural Sprudel Salt of Carlsbad. It is obtained by evapora- 2% tion at the Springs, and is £2 fdentical with the waters Sie in ifs action and results, which are the same to-day M ZS as when Emperor Charles IV. was cured four kun- dred years ago, and later George Ill., Peter the Great,and Maria Theresa benefited by their use. Thev aid digestion, cure constipation, and purify she blood. Be sure to obtain the genuine im- foried article, with the signature of “i:vsner & Mendelson Co. Sole Agents, New York,”’ om the bottie, ER OH: A 0 . 3! Rais SHOOTING A RUNAWAY, He Stopped the Horse, Sxpensive. As The Star reporter was walking along With street with a the other evening a runaway horse dashed up street and disappeared around the circie of Thomas “I never see a thing like that,” comment- ed the man, “that I don’t think of my own but It Was experience and at once thank the Lord that I live in a land of street s. Let me tell you about it. I haven't owned a horse for fifteen years and I'll never another That many years thought a horse was an absolute to my happiness and It had to be a one. I lived at that titae in Cincir and the only pi: for driving was on the roads through the killtop suburbs. Well, 1 1 bought a fin which had cost me he from Kentucky ans to get the earth d the re- § porte: ~. I wouldn't be surpris: laughed the man. “In any event that’s what I had in- vested in the one I bought and he was an amateur as far as the city was con-. rned at least six months driving streets before he was th anything as far as his safety went. ¢ first Sunday I had him I went out on hills to show him off, for he was a uty and I wouldn't have sold him for » what I gave for him as he red proudly through the subtrhan aver the observed of all observers. But he was the a to drive and I had to k om a con- p start strain t with me.” “But this wasn't turn of a road prevent his enough, leading along a > at Te utiful bit st a hundred feet Ohio 1 he jum in his and off iid he w no goed, f th sawed and pulled, but it when we struck the straight road te rds that meant su 1 stop; before tr re he at pui forth all my en- vor. § was I in trying to him that we were nearly to th before I noticed and then I couldn't jump out as I bad f tied the line: 1 first start put of date yet agin d, the me kind ©: chances , man appenred at the to yell at him to shoot th ed to me it took him a half he on to what I wanted, but it long as *h: and bang went the and bang again and the third time bang. all so quick as scarcely to be counted, and my horse went down In a heap not fifty feet from the edge of the cliff and headed directly for it. Two jumps more and beautiful landscape sleeping so peacefu below would have i streaked with my mortal remains, and $70) wasn’t too high a price to pay. Ince anyhow orce anyhow; preferred to take my then a police™ ventured the reporter. but I didn’t want to try it again, end,” corcluded the nar- rator, “I gave the buggy and stuff and the dead horse to the policeman me and took the street car Which the same is good enough riding for me. 6 The True Tale of a Keen Young Man f Capitol Bi s of this country, outside of politics, do not live in New York. One of the greatest of them, nameless here forever more, lives in more or less regal splendor on Capitol Hill. That is to say> he lives In regal splendor when he is asleep and the rest of the time it is pretty much boarding house, except when the mother’ of his best girl takes more pity on him than she ever will after he is married, and asks him to take dinner at her house. About a weck ago this financial Machia- velli sat in a poker game with a young man whose reputation for not paying any kind of a bill is wider than the District of umbia at its widest part, and he won $75 from him, for which he gave his check, Our Machiavelli from Capitol Hill didn't want to take the check, because he had heard how previous checks had not been available, as there wasn’t quite enough money in bank to meet them, and there was usually a squabble which didn't de- clare any dividends worth mentioning, But he had to take the check, or nothing, and when he had taken t him down to. , think, When morning came he had thought, and as soon bank was open he was ney to meet i said the paying teller, with the invariable suavity of a paying teller. ’ supposed not,” smiled and bowed the holder of the check, “and I was instru to make up the difference, so if you wil kind enough to tell me what ft is ll fix it.” He was informed that the balance was and the Machiavelli at once deposited to the credit of his friend and then pre- #1 sented the check, which was, of course, honored, and he came out of ak just $62 ahead and no bother to anybody 7 < part of it was that when the maker of the check met him and he told im that a friend of his had deposited enough money to his credit to make his check good, he never asked who the friend wa Inde . he never a od ny questions at all; he slumped and kept his mouth shut. THE ROYAL ROAD. "7 GOOD FOOD IS THE ONLY WAY. It's a man's bad habits that hurt him mm overwork. ‘The little habits of coffee ai hurt worse than some of the big om ire coatinued more steadily than the ¥ A man is simply polsoned to d lolds of coffee and tot and never will be » what Is hurting him. Let him quit and use Postam Cereal, th coffee, and vers soon great rest tw icine Is ne simply qu those things which polson and wiste the energy, and let nature bmild into boty and bratu from good food. Dostum is ma tirely of grains by the Postum Cereal Co., lin Battle Creek, Mi arishing and fa ing. Use plain, common food and the food drink (it looks like coffee, but is mot). Health will come and be of much more solid character than when patched up with drags, Dr. H. P Merriman, 2239 Mi cago, says: have pleased with it iB ave., Chi tried the Postum and am “Just as good” as Postum Cereal are words used te defraud the public. .