Evening Star Newspaper, August 15, 1896, Page 14

THE EVENING STAR, SATURDAY, AUGUST 15, 1896--TWENTY-FOUR PAGES, There are some mountain sections where political discussions are seldom heard, and voters can be found who do not know the names of the presidential candidates. One of these went to vote at the election of 1892, according to a story told to a Star reporter. It was in the Chilbowee moun- tains, and the voter had to walk twenty miles to Sevierville in order to cast his ballot. When he reached the voting place, demo- | erats and republicans offered him tickets. “I don’t want none—I hain't voted all I've got yit.” He handed his ticket in, and it was placed in the box. As he left, an acquaint- ance asked bin how he voted. “Jess as I allus do,” was the reply. “Fust time I ever voted for ole Jackson. feller giv me lot 0” tickets, an’ I've voted one every “lection sence. I reckon ther's plenty ter las’ me rest of my days. J'm gittin’ ole, and won't git ter vote Many more.” e*£ ee “TI was riding along a mountain road in Leslie county, Ky." said a timber buyer to @ Star reporter, “and at nightfall sought shelter at a double log cabin. I had some | acquaintance with the occupant of the | house, and he introduced me to three men | who seemed to be boarding with him. We | sat up that night and play d cards until | late, after which I retired, occupying a bed with one of the boarders, who had been in- troduced to me a3 Sam Taylor. During the night it grew so hot I could not sleep, and I went to the window to get some air. My host was below, and leveling a rifle at me he said back thar, Sam, an’ drop yo’ hness.”” { hastily called ont, “Don’t shoot, It’s me, and hurried to bed.” The next morning my host apolog:zed. “I'm glad I didn’ shoot befo" I spoke,” he said. see, these gentlemen yo’ met | las’ night is all ‘cused of murder, sah, an’ the one yo" slep’ with has done ben con- victed an’ waitin’ ter go ter Frankfort soon’s I kin sit time ter take ‘Im, so I watch’ ‘Im purty clost fear he gits restless. I'm jailer, an’ thar ain’ no jail, so they Jess lives with me, and I take ‘em huntin’ an’ fishin’, an’ try to be squar with ‘em, so ¥ me no trouble. But thet fel- ler Taylor's Jess sort o' cranky. Killed ten men, an’ +f he takes a notion agin er feller he jess shoots ‘im, so I didn’ want ‘im to git outer that window. He's gittin® oneasy, an’ I reckon I'll hev ter start ter Frankfort with ‘im termorrer. xe ee x “For two days last week," remarked a lady clerk in the treasury, “the thermom eter at a drux store near my home regis. tered 20% in the shade.”* “Nonsense,” replied her companion; “the thermometer was out of order.” No such thin.” persisted the lady. “I looked at {t myself, and I know what I am talking of. Quite a number of people no- ticed it, and the druggist will bear me out in my s' “Kats! W i go up to the drug store, and I'll bet you all the ice cream soda you can drink during August you can't prove any such thing.” A few minutes later they walked into the drug store, and the lady accosted the drug- gist “Can you tell me what the thermometer in the doorway registered last Wednesday afternoon about 4 “Just 1," replied the druggist, consult- randum tacked up on the wall t at ths same hour on Thur: day afternoon?” she asked. } mer,” replied the man of | “It was w drugs, again looking at the card. “It reg- istered just 1 “Ther: she chippered. “Add 100 and 103 and you will nd that the result will convince you I am entitled to an unlimited Graft on the soda fountain. I'll take va- nilla and ice cream,” she continued, as the cierk placed some glasses on the counter. * * 4+ & In Kentucky it fs necessary for a voter to pay « poll tax of $2 in order to be allowed | to vote. ‘This necessitates a campaign fund | im both parties—in-erder to enfranchise | such ers as cannot pay the tax. | At Mount Sterling an old man came in and the manager of the republican cam- | | paign asked nim ff he had voted. | “No; hain't got my poil tax paid yit,” | was the reply. He was given $2 and start-| ed for the collector's office. On the way he met the democratic candidate. “Voted yet?” inquired the politician. “No; hain’t got the poll tax.” The candidate produced $2 and the old man went, paid his poll tax, returned and | voted. “Well, you voted right, did you?” inquired | the republican. “Yaas. I allus votes as my conscience @ictates. I never ‘lows no consideration but | duty ter influence me. I voted as I allus does, th’ straight prohibition ticket, ter do | away with rum, an’ drive ther corrupt ole | parties out of the Kentry.” ** K€ * “There is one satisfaction in this warm weather,” remarked an observing farmer, “gnd that is, wlile we are having a re- markably hot summer, all the indications point to a very severe winter. All the signs point that way. The chestnut tree is a very good prophesier of the kind of a win- ter we are to have. When the burrs are very hard 2nd large it is a never-failing sign. They are very hard and large just new. The ants are also very busy laying plans for a severe winter, and constructing their winter hovses very deep down into the ground. I take a great deal of stock In this sign, for after a careful observation of forty years, they have never failed to indicate the winter. Other signs may fail, but the chestnut tree and the ants are seldom, if ever, wrong, and they are unan- imous for a severe winter.” * * ek * “Gold. when refined from all impurities,” said a well-known jeweler, “and alloys of inferior metals ts denominated pure. This means gold of twenty-four carats, and this ‘s the standard recognized by the mint master and dealers in gold. As a matter of fact, however, there is no gold so pure. Gold of twenty-two carats is about as pure as it can be got. It has two parts of sil- ver, or one part of silver and one part of copper. The copper Gancens | the color of gold, while silver lUght- ens it in color. Twenty-three-carat gold is occasionally seen, which means a half carat of silver and of copper. Or- dinarily, eighteen-carat gold 1s the best 1d that be had. Certainly it ts the Sect for jewelry, for pure gold, as it ia called, is too soft and will wear away much faster than the owners of it desire.” * * KKK “Lookirg up some political Hterature re- cently in the preparation of a campaign Gocument,”” said a political writer, “I was iruch interested in the origin of the term whigs. The original whigs were organized in Whiggammore, a home of freebooters om the borders of Scotland. The Highland- ers and Irish gave the name of whigs to the people of Whiggammore. They were gaid to be a race of thieves. The name was coined in 1648, and whigs was the term uted for the people who did not walk im the straight and narrow paths. As far as the term whig is applied to our politics, I have an {dea that its origin came from the first letters in their motto, which they weed liberally on their flags and er ‘We hope in God.” The term, I think, cleat- ly came frcm tha Initial letters. There is no positive authority for the coining of the ee eee “Hot weather talk has been very indulged in of late,” remarked a naval ob- servatory professor, “and I find thet near- | who has iJ | Shore despise a man who | ef he'd cotched ‘im he'd hung "im, ly every one makes the ccmmon error in regard to th: influence of the sun on the weather. Thus the remark is very fre- qvently heard that the sun 4s very hot to- day, or the sun is very near us today, the impression being that the nearer we are to the sun, or the nearer the sun fs to us, the warmer weather we have. Now, the facts in the case are all the other way, for the nearer the sun tho greater the cold. All lofty mountains are capped with snow, even under the equator. This effectually disproves the impression that the nearer the sun the greater the heat. Aeronauts all tell us that as they get nearer to the sun the cooler it is. They would freeze in the warmest day in the summer if they at- tained any very great height if they were not protected with the warmest clothing. ek KK “The preserving season ts now at hand, and the talk of danger from the copper preserving kettle is again heard throughout the land,” observed an experienced house- keeper. “Like many others, I prefer a cop- per kettle, though I admit that the en- ameled iron kettles are the easiest cleansed and kept clean. Copper kettles seem to make better preserves or jams. I do not know the reason for it, but my experience has always been that way. There is one thing, however, I would like to impress upon all who use copper kettles, and that is never to allow any preserves to cool in them. Better pour them out when the preserves are boiling hot. In this way there Is no danger from verdigris. The best preserves are ruined sometimes by al- lowing them to cool in a copper kettle. I don’t think I have ever seen a brass kett= that I would feel safe in using. Ordinarily, however, the enameled iron kettles are generally used, though old-fashioned folks like myself prefer copper.” x ek ee OK “I do not know whether {t is superstition or fun, but there is at least one in every six of the men who walk on the slab pave- ment on the north side of the treasury,” sald the policeman on duty at the corner of 15th street and Pennsylvania avenue, “who religiously refuse to step on a crack be- tween the slabs. Sometimes, to clear a crack, they have to take a hop, skip and jump motion, which 1s very amusing to ob- | serve. Some men have told me that they have never knowingly stepped on a crack. ‘They cannot explain why they do not, but they do not just the same. Now, with ladies it is entirely different. They never seem to pick out their steps, and every- thing, crack or slab, goes with them. I know some men who aré’sd tdrefull to save themselves from stepping on a crack, when they pass up or down in front of the treas- ury, that they always turn out on the drive- way. Some men carry it so far that they are equally careful at night time and pick out their steps.” eK OK KK There is a mother over on Capitol Hill a bright little three-year-old, whose only fault is that he is just a trifle spoiled. Once in a great while he sets his mind on some vital question—and then his will and mamma’s authority are bound to clash. When bed time arrived the other night Master Walter wasn’t ready to re- tire—in fact, steaGfastly refused to budge | from the front porch. Mamma “reasoned” with him,-but of no ih. “Me don’t wish to doe to bed, mami he tearfully explained. “Me not sleep: “The good Lord doesn’t love Ittle boys who disobey their mammas,” she replied. “The stars up-in heaven watch the raughty ttle boys, and tell God every- thing they do.” This information had the desired effect, and he at once consented to be put to bed. As he was being undressed he told his mamma, confidentially, “I dess I won't be naughty any more at night, mamma. I'll be naughty in de day time, and den Dod won't know nuffin’ ‘bout it ‘Then he fell asleep. ee WANTED TO PESTER. But Could Not Find Any Way to Get at It. ‘There had been a feud between Asa Jones and Rube Tully near Bakersville, N. C., for a good while, and mutual shots had been | fired. ‘ I had heard aH about the trouble from Jones = yeas before, and being eats in: the neighborhood, asked Jones how it was com- | ing out. “The derned cuss air ahead, an’ I reckon he'll stay so now,” was the reply, and 3 looked very lugubrious. “So you don’t think you can get even?” “I reckon not. I don’. s felier in the night when he kain’t holp his- self.” “How did he do it?” “Waal, yo’ see, th’ sheriff war arter ‘Im fer killin’ a fellar down at Asheville, an’ n’ hisself in my spring, makin’ me tote water a mile. Reckon he thought it Wer smart ter git even.” Then, after a 3 ‘Kin yo" tell any way ter pes I “Mus’ be some way. ‘Tain’t right that feller kin drown hisself in my spring an’ me not hev no chance ter pester ‘is ha’ant.”” eS gees Out of the Frying Pan. From Flfegende Blatter. ART AND ARTISTS In a few days Me. Spencer Nichols will go to Paxson, Va., for a ‘second visit, and whl remain there for @ couple/of weeks. Among the good studies made up in that region on his first trip 1s an effect of early ‘morning light in the woods. It is just be- ‘fore dawn, when the light is beginning to steal between the leaves. The-faint haze in the air has not yet been dispelled by the rising sun, and gives the scene a very subtle effect, which is not easily grasped ‘and requires careful treatment. In the color scheme cool grays and delicate greens predominate, and there are no @trong contrasts, but so numerous are the almost imperceptible variations on the pre- vailing colors that one would scarcely find two shades exactly alike in the entire study. Mr, Nichols is now at work on another canvas of a different character, but with the same interesting color scheme. While he was at Paxson he made quite @ number of sketches of the open fields, ; with the Blue Ridge mountains rising like @ wall in the background, with their ever- changing elusive effects of Hight and shade. One of these studies taken on a gray dey is especially true to nature. Mr. Nichols intends to take up with him a large figure study, which he has commenced, and to work upon it there. He expects to send this picture to the exhibition at the Cos- mos Club. * * Miss Mary Berri Chapman is in Bristol, R. 1, giving herself an almost complete rest, under which she {s experiencing a dectded tmprovement in health. She ex- Pects, if she continues to gain in strength, to return to the city when the cool weath- er sets in, and, taking a studio down town, resume once more ective work in pen and ink and water color. = om * * Mr. Jules A. Dieudonne has spent con- siderable time out at his home in Bladens- burg during the warm weather, and has had sufficient energy to do quite a little sketching In the neighborhood of Wash- ington. He has also commenced work on his designs for the interior decoration of the New Columbia Theater, that part of the work having been placed in his hands. In the theater proper the decoration will consist mainly in ornamental designs paint- ed_on the wall so as to have the effect of relief work, though there may be two or three figure panels. In the vestibule, how- ever, Mr. Dieudonne 1s to make an ex- tensive figure decoration, painting the com- position in his studio on strips of canvas, which will afterward be attached to the wall. The two figures which now occupy places on either side of the proscenium in Metzerott Hall, and which are the work of Mr. H. J. Ellicott, the sculptor of the Hancock state, as well as the panel by Mr. U. 8, J. Dunbar, now over the stage, will be utilized in the decoration of the new building. * x 4 Miss Antoinette Connoly has just returh- ed from Cape May, where she has been quite busy with a number of marine vie: She is very successful in outdoor work, though most of her painting has Ween: in: the line of study heads and portraits. * * Mr. H. B. Bradford keeps himself quite busy with illustrating in pen and ink and water color, and in sketching everything that might some day be adapted to his use. He always carries a_ note-. beok and pencil with him, and wherever he gces jots down some of the !nteresting things that he sees. He gains in facility by this method, and as he never likes to make any part of iis illustrations without @ model to work from, he is often able to draw on the material in his sketch books for bits of detail. A glanc nate, kcok reveals sketches of danc rs and bath- ers at a summer resort, animals at the Zoo, quaint bits caught on the street, and drawings of all sorts of subjects jostiing exch other on its pages. Mr. Bradford may take a trip up to Harper's Ferry before long and make a short stay there. * * * Mr. W. W. Christmas has been working at Ocean City, and has been busying him- self with a number of the marine scenes for which the place affords such’ excellent ofportunities. * * * In about a week Mr. George Gibbs will also go to Ocean City to sketch and, to complete his series of illustrations of sea life, “The Old Navy and the New.” Among these drawings is one entitled “Victory,” not the glorious triumph that people are wont to associate with the word, but a vio- tory so dearly bought by the loss of men as to seem little better than defeat. The deck of the conquering vessel is strewed., with the bodies of the dead and wounded, and over its shattered rail is seen the oth ship going down in the distance. Another battle scene by Mr. Gibbs is the fight be- tween the Serapis and the Bonhomme Rich- ard, an engagement which lasted all night, ard well into the morning. The ships, lashed together at the bows, are pouring @. murderous fire into each other, and so bright is the light which their fire casts upon the water that the moonlight which is reflected beside it seems quite pale by comparison. In order to get the values more accurately, this drawing was executed partly in color. A more peaceful scene in the series shows the toast “Sweethearts ‘and Wives Ashore,” being drunk on hoard @ man-of-war, Mr. Gibbs is also at work on a couple of drawings giving two phases of the office seeker’s life. The first one shows him newly arrived with bigh hopes of getting a sinecure under Uncle Sam, but the second gives us a picture of the same man ragged and discouragad and without the heart to go back to his native town even if he had the money. Mr. Gibbs will not come back from Ocean City without bringing with him several water-color sketches for the exhibition of the Water Color Club in the fall. * * % The 1st of September will probably find Mr. E. H. Miller and his family enjoying the delightful climate of Shandaken, N. Y, in the Catskill mountains. Mr. Miller has been there before, and says the country there is practically inexhaustible so far 28 material for sketching goes, and he will undoubtedly bring back many interesting landscapes. * x * Mr. Rudolph Cronau, perhaps better known as an author than as an artist, has also a foridness for mountain Scenery, end is quite successful. in delineating the vary- ee sspects fot mountain peaks: He is at esent staying in vi N. Y., the Adirondacks. oe ooree —_____ SHE GOT BAOK. A Raft Proved to Be a Poor Convey- ance for the Elopers. “I rode up to a cabin in Knox county, Ky.,” said John Willtams, a traveling man, to a Star reporter, “and as I apr proached the man of the house inquired: “ ‘Stranger, did yo’ see a red-headed gal with ue yaller sunbonnet comin’ from town? “No! “I reckon she'll be hyar termorrer.’ “ ‘Expecting company? “No; Jess my darter. She's ben down ter Frankfort. She tuk in her head ter git marricd.an run off with a no-‘count fel- ler, Tim Hadley. They stole a raft of mine oe floated down the Kaintuck ter Frank- ~ “No; mi or ‘ankfort Ne a raft, #0 I writ ter Jim eld denn ‘akefiel thar ter buy th’ logs, put Tim. ing _ G " u all toy faved af See hee of Ae MTs Seep core “Waal, Sal, yo’ got back oe in jail?” ‘ a . “Yaas, dad.’ pune dack th’ money fer th’ loge? “Yeas, dad.” “ "Waal, in an’ cook en’ time yo’ raft. ’ and the girl went to the kitohen ts thou she had never left it.” DAN, {2 BARKEEPER He Goes Over to”New York to Attend the Bryn Meeting. ae He Finds °G Crowd of Tammany Men at His Otd,,Friend Dooney’s to: tot a and ‘Tali Gold to Them. 40 — T HE REGULARS AT the Oft and Early approached their l- bations with an un- usually quiet de- meanor yesterday morning, and even the drop-ins, who are sometimes in- clined to be unduly jovial, felt a strange atmosphere of gloom and sadness pervad- ing the place as they leaned on the bar rail and called for their concoctions. The appearance of Dan was explicable of these new conditions, A white linen bandage caressed a large lump in the place wh2re his genial blue eye was wont pleasantly to gleam. There was an angry redness about his hose, and when he sighed his Parted lips developed a void two deep in his erstwhile even set of teeth. There was bitterness in the touch with which he wiped the glasses, and when he drew a stein of beer his motions with the spigot were those of a strangler eagerly grasping the neck of an enemy. "d hate t’ give Dan de finger dis mawn- in’,” said McGuigan, the tailor, to Raf- ferty, the contractor. “Hev he bin in er t'rashin’ masheen?” He Talked Gold. inquired Rafferty. They had quaffed their beer and were now outside. “Naw," responded McGuigan, scorntully. “He's bin in er mix-up summers, bud I Wudn't ax "Im ‘bout it fur er-kalg o dl- Monts... i 2 Just then Sim Foley came along. | ; Nell otrall in behint. Sim,” whispered Rafferty. “Dan'll rise ter Sim like er feésh ter a wum.” Dan’s Sarcastic Description. “Whut's de matter wid me face?” re- Peated Dan fo Sim with a gleam of dendly anger in hit: only observable eye. “W’'y, it’s er silvet banner, dat’s whut’s’ de* maz ter wid {t:"athin else in de worl’. It's er “Willum Jay; Bryan chromio; er Sen'tor Willum Btooart cote uv arms; er Silver Dick Blan’ fronterspiete, an’ it's right fresh frum de fact'ry ware dey makes ‘em in de elty uv N's Yawk, M’n’att’n Ilan’. Any yuther p'oblems dat yer wanter solve?” “Oh, come. off de perch, Mr. High an’ Mighty,” returned Foley, with careless su- perlerity:":"€ome down ter de eart’ an’ in the Middle. tell us how yer got yer wisage all mussed up, We've had it wuss'n dat ér whole ‘lot é¢ttines:” Now ware'd ye git it. Take. er slug an’, open de deal.” Thus urged, Dan allowed a mournful smile to.crease his counfenance, and after putting in the shot he proceeded to en- lighten Kis expectant friends. The Mystery Unrnveled. “Yer see, de boss an’ me fixt t’ings up sose I kin take Wensd’y an’ T’ursd’y off, an’ him git t'day an’ t'morrer an’ go ter ‘Tlantic City till Mundy. So, off I goes ter N' Yawk ftir de Bryan ratfercashun meet- in’, I hit D'brossis street Wensdy evenin’ an’ tuk de el’vatec vp ter Dooney’s, ware I useter wuk. Say, de wedder wuz hot—bud de people! Well, dey wuz wile! I never see de town so tore up. Even In de cars Dan Explains, fellers wuz scrappin’ bout Bryan an’ de munny {ssher, an’ dere wuz mo’ yahoos fum Jersey an’ Stattin Ilan’ an’ Scoharie, an’ ‘ell knows ware, dan ever got tergedder in de ole town befo’. Well, er mug I uster know, er broker, git jammed up ergin me in de car an’. gimme gole tawk till I'd er dabbed er in ge nose whut even want- ed ter len’ me er fen-doilar silver stificate befo’ we gotter Fa’teent’ street. I got off at T’irty-secan’ am; steered fur Dooney’s. T hed me tigkit tem de Gard’n, cause Tom Coakley hedxfxt dat fur me. Dan Téiks Gold in Dooney’s. . “Dooney wyz Jafg full of dubs yellin’ fur contin- boose an’ silwcr at de same time,’ ued Dan, with a ‘tinge of sadness in his tone, “au’ w'én I'd got de cinders outen me t'roat I jined,jn an’,give ‘em gole.” Hers Dan»:paused with painful embar- rassment. °% al “I dunno who hit'me fust,” he remarked, sadly, “‘an’ nelder Guz Dooney; bud all dem Gubs tuk a han’ ezsoon ez it started. "Twus de quickest t'ing I ever see, on’y I did’n’ see it, cause a bi#@ mug wid er fut like ham had ‘ls heel if dis eye. W’en I come to, Dooney wuz moppin’ me wid er ice towel, and he sez ter me, ‘Dan,’ sez he, ‘sence ye've bin down in Wash'ton,’ sez he, ‘yere turned dam fool. Phat a’ ‘ell dye mane by tawkin’ gole t’ er crowd av Tam’ny hathens on sech er day ez dthis. Whol, man, Tam’ny’s andorshed dther tick (Eee ternite’s dth’ ratficashun. Did yex iow dthat? sez he. ‘I did,’ sez I. ‘I cum over ter attend it’ ‘Ter attind it? sez Dooney. ‘Yes,’ sez I. ‘An’ tawkin’ gole er dam broker,’ sex Dooney. ‘He wuz thér last man I heard tawk,’ sez I. Dooney’s Diagnosis. “Then Dooney stopped moppin’ me an’ tuk er luk at mo quare. ‘Mike,’ sex he ter th’ barkeep, ‘sind fur Docther Walsh. Dthim dam. terriers hev bin batin’ up er soonsthroock man,’ seg he, ‘er I’m dthe Pope av Rome.’ “Wid dat, boys, Dooney an’ Mike hustled me upstairs an’ trun me inter bed an’ tn | doctor come. He sez ter putt beefstake on me eye an’ ice ter me hed an’ ter gimme no stimmerlant under any succumstance. An’, boys, Dooney did dat ting stiddy till yistiddy in de middle ov de day. Say, w’en I gotter ‘way fum Dooney’s dere wuz er bale er cotton in me t’roat, an’ I made er guy in de nex’ block t'ink I'm crasy dead sure by callin’ fur er punch on de tce in er cel'ry glass.” “Well, wuz de meetin’ er success?” quo- ried Sim Foley. Dan's face clouded. “Say,” he ejaculated, “I gives it out straight. De dub whut sez meetin’ ter me @its 1. in de neck.” Then, after a portentous pause, he added: oo de same t'ing goes crbout silver an fole. eS THE HONEST RUSTIC. A Piano Drummer Tells How a Cu: tomer Took in Several Things. “Talk all you want to about the bunco steerer and other sharpers of the metropo- \s,"" remarked a drummer the other even- ing at a down-town hotel to a Star report- er, “but some of the sharpest of the sharps are to be found fn the country. Out among the fields and lambs and sheep and other innocent thirgs, don’t you know.” “That's because you don’t expect to find such sharpness among the rurals,” ex- plained the reporter, who was born and raised in the country, and didn’t like to see his fellow-countrymen Iibeled. “Expecting it or not,” insisted the drum- mer, “the sharpness is there, just the same, and it js just a8 sharp. For instance,” and the drummer fixed himself for a longer heat, “some years ago, when I was a drum- mer in pianos, I'll tell you what an expe- rience I had. Our house was one-of the big ones, with an advertisement in every newspaper in the country, and the way we sold pianos was a caution to snakes.” “Also a tip to alleged business men who don’t advertise,” interrupted the reporter. ‘Your ‘also’ is sustained,” said the drum- mer, and proceeded. “As I was saying, we sold pianos right and left, and, as might be expected, we picked up a bad customer at frequent intervals. One of these had got @ three-hundred-dollar piano on a small spot cash payment, balance monthly, on the strength of a farm we thought was his, also on his general reputation, which up to this time had been as good as anybody's in that community.” “Like Eve's in the garden?” ventured the reporter. “Exactly,” smiled the drummer. “If the devil had not tempted that hitherto ex- emplary female she would have come through in good shape, and just so with our customer. A three-hundred-dollar piano was more than he could stand, and he went down before it. After his’ first payment he failed to respond, and we waited as long as was our practice, and then sent word to him to return the piano, as per contract. In due time the piano box, in as good trim as when we sent it, came back, and we put it in stock. A month later it was shipped to another customer, and we heard from it soon to the effect that there wasn’t any plano there, but that the box was filled with pieces of wood and iron of about the piano’s weight, and wedged solidly into the box. Ordinarily we would not have been so careless, but we were rushing things, and had to neglect details. Now we had to make up for that neglect, and I went after our bunco friend in the country. He lived two hundred miles away. and at a short distance from the small town to which we had shipped the plano, which was on the railroad. Well, I got there one morning about 11 o'clock, and, tackling the first driver I saw, I asked him if he could take me to Jim Pe- ters’ place. He was a nice, honest-ap- pearing sort of a chap, and he told me Jim had moved to another place, about twenty miles away, and that I could only get there by driving over five miles to another road and go ahead on that to Jim’s station. I paid him a dollar to drive me over, and he told me, as I had never seen Mr. Peters, to ask anybody, and he wouid be pointed out, as everybody knew him. The station where we caught the train was only a crossing, and my driver flagged the a commodation, the conductor nodding f: miliariy to him as I got aboard. As the train moved off, my driver drove briskly away, and when the conductor came around, ten minutes later, I asked him if he knew Jim Peters, and he almost toppled over on me in his surprise. ‘Why,—why,’ he stammered, ‘that was Jim Peters drivin’ you.’ Then it occurred to me that the plano card on my satchel had given me away, and Mr. Peters had done the rest. We tried to get the piano again,” con- cluded the drummer, “but we lost all trace of it, and finally gave it up, and Mr. Peters, I presume, went with it.” NOT LEGAL TENDER. An Obsolete Statute Got This Into Very Serious Trouble. “I was making political speeches through ‘Tennessee two years ago,” said a promin- ent stump orator to a Star reporter. “After the speaking was over one day a rcugh-looking mountaineer approached me and said: “I reckon yo’ be a lawyer?” T admitted that I was. “Waal, I want yo’ to settle a p'int.” “What is it?” “Ain't that thar good law?” and he show- ed me a paper on which was printed a copy of an early Tennessee statute, making coon skins legal tender. “No. That used to be the law, but it has been repealed.” “Shure?” “Yes.” “An’ a man ain’ boun’ ter take coon “What's a’ ear wuth, jedge?” “An ear?” “Yaas, a lef ear. Yo" see, when th’ store- ‘keeper thar in Snake Holler wouldn’ take cocn skins, we had a fout, an’ I cut off his let’ ear. Then ruther than go to co’t we done made up that w leave it to yo’, and ef this warn’t law I'd pay 'im somethin’ for the ear.” “Well, an ear ought to be worth $1,000.” “A thousan’ dollars? Jedge, ef thet’s sp, I reckon I'll jes hev ter giv ‘im one o’ mine, an’ git a doctor ter put it on fer ‘im—a thou- san’ dollars. Wisht I could fin’ thet feller thet writ thet piece "bout people hevin’ ter take coon skins.”” - —_—— KNEW THE PLATFORM. The Man Who Built the Democratic Platform Tells About It. McDowell county, West Virginia, has a citizen who has never been known to admit ignorance on any subject, and very few things ever happen that he did not have some part in. Here is the latest story about him, as told to a Star reporter. A group was gathered in a country store, discussing politics. George Whalen, the man of wonderful knowledge and achieve ments, although a stanch democrat, so de- parted from the declaration of principles that one of the men said: “You don’t know a thing about the democratic platform.” “Don't_I? Know the democratic plat- form? Why, I built it myself. There wasn’t a stick of anything but solid poplar. A thousand people were on that platform, and it never settled the hundredth part of an inch. Talk to me about not knowing anything about a platform! If you'll come down to the cove where they held their barbecue, I'll show you the platform stand- ing yet.” es What the Girl Does. From the Indianapolis Journal, She—“He whistled as he went for want of thought. Of course it was a boy. You wouldn’t find a girl whistling for want of thought.” He—“No; she wouldn’t whistle; she'd talk.” ——_-+e+ Extract From a Vacation Letter. From Life. “NEWPORT, August 10, 1896. “Dear Father: I am doing a bit of hack work at present, which pays very well and throws me with pleasant people.” / IN HOTEL CORRIDORS “I have always prided myself on my ability as a cook,” said C. T. Whitemore of Atlanta et the Metropolitan, “but I found one thing that I could not cook. When I am at home I frequently prepare the fancy dishes for dinner, although we have a colored woman In the kitchen, who is as good a cook as one generally finds. She nevers interferes with me when I take @ notion to trespass upon her territory. One of my specialties is cooking fish. I had some friends stopping with me, who went fishing. Among other things they brought home an eel. I had never tried to cook an eel and did not care to acknowl- edge the fact, so went at it as though I cooked them every day. One necessary step I did not take, I did not skin it. I baked thc eel for two hours and was very Proud of my success. It certainly did look appetizing when placed on the table. But 8 soon as the guests were all seated that eel started out of the dish and across the table. The ladies fled and I threw him out of the window. I now believe all the stor- ies I hear about an ee!'s tenacity of life.” “It would seem that some people were born to meet with accidents,” said D. P. Simonton of Chicago at the Cochran. “I have sold goods on the road for twenty years, during which time I have been on trains dally, except for one month in each year. I have never seen any one injured on @ railroad train nor been delayed by any serious accident. Two years ago a younger brother of mine. started to selling goods. The first trip out he had his arm broken in a collision. Since then he has been in three collisions, and two accidents caused by broken rails, being somewhat injured in each one. I heard from him here, and the letter states that he was hurt in the At- lantic City collision, in which so many were killed, but that he has recovered sufficiently to attend to business. I do not think he could possibly travel a year without get- ting into a railroad wreck.” “There was a lawyer in my town who had @ lesson in practicing what he preached,” said A. C. Thornton of Decatur, Ill, at the Normandie. “The constant theme upon which his speeches rest is the equality of man, and he 1s very popular with the farm- ers and working people on account of the eloquent way in which he discourses upon each man’s equality with other men. Some time ago he Fired a farmer to plow a tract of land and plant it in corn. It took five days, and the lawyer paid the farmer a dollar a day. Some months later the farmer came into town and told the at- torney he had ‘a Job of lawyerin’’ for him. He took him ten miles into the country, where the attorney tried a case before a justice of the peace that lasted all day. At the close, the farmer handed him a dollar. "This: won’t do,’ said the lawyer, ‘my lowest fee is ten dollars.” ‘No, you said all men are ekal, an’ you paid me a dollar a day for plowin’, an’ I pay you a dollar a day for lawyerin’,’ replied the farmer, and no amount of talk could se- cure more morey.” “Every one has scme hot weather recol- lections, days like these,” said E. L. Far- son of Omaha, at Page's. “I am not good at remembering dates, but when I was a boy, about forty-five years ago, there was @ summer that started in very late, there was a killing frost during the latter part of June. It became hot the first of July and for three months there was not a day that the thermometers did not register as high as lv degrees some time during the day. I* did not rain for three months. July, August and September passed with- out any relief whatever. Streams and springs dried up, and in the part of Ohio lived in, Harrison county, there was a water famine. Animals died in great num- bers from effects of the heat. This sun mer is hot enough, but when I contrast 1t with that one, about 1850 or 1851, I find 00d reason for being thankful that it is no worse.” “Sunstrokes are confined almost entirely to towns, and principally to cities,” said Dr. A. C. Fowler of Atoka, Ind. at the Howard. “Cases of sunstroke are very rare in the country and seldom fatal. Men work in the broiling sun, when thermom- eters register over a hundred degrees in the shade, and very seldom have to even seek shade. Harvesting is done in the hottest seasons of the year, and yet the hands are not. injuriously affected. To some extent this is explained by the use of iced drinks and intoxicating liquors in the towns and cities, and it is partly due to the sun being reflected from sidewalks and houses in a city, while its rays absorbed by the earth in the country; but these matters would not seem to explain all of the dif- ference, and it appears remarkable to me that there are no sunstrokes in the coun- “I notice a few inferior geodes in the National Museum,” said A. T. Kreibel of Warsaw, I, at the La Fetra. “They were 80 common at Warsaw a few years ago that they became known as Warsaw diamonds. Most of them have been picked up, and those remaining are small and in- ferior, but many much finer specimens could be found in Warsaw now than any of those In the museums. Some of these geodes were several feet in diameter, and when broken open the crystals looked like 2 thousand diamonds. A few of them were filled with water, and these were exception- ally brilliant. Walks were bordered with them, and piles of them placed in yards for ornaments. There is a glen about five miles from Warsaw where they are sti! to be found by wagon loads.” “There certainly is such a thing as luck,” said W. L. Hartley of Glasgow, Mo., at Cnamberlin’s. “I was talking to a fisher- man who has operated on the Missouri river for many years, and he told me an in- stance that is remarkable, and it is not a fish story, elther. I was talking to him about his business, and asked him if he did not find many peculiar things in his constant rowing about the river. He said that he did, the most singular thing being the body of a man who had been drowned. He suid: ‘I had a partner in the fishing business once. He borrowed $10 from me, and that was the last I ever saw or heard of him. About five years afterward I was out attending to my lines, when I saw something floating. I took a grappling hook and pulled it to my boat. It was a man, and when I got him into the boat I found that it was my partner. But the funny thing about it was that when I looked through his pockets I discovered a $10 bill, just the amount he owed me. That —_ the most remarkable experience I ever ad.” “The trip of Bryan to New York re- minds me of oki times,” said A. L. Orton of Cincinnati, at the National. ‘In 1872 I lived in the same city I do now. There was seemingly a very widespread dissntis- faction in the republican party over Gen- eral Grant’s renomination, and the demo- crats and bolting republicans nominated Horace Greeley, while the straightout dem- gcrats nominated Chas. O'Connor. Gree- ley’s election was very confidently pre- dicted and a tidal wave in his favor re- ported from all sections of the country. He made a grand triumphal tour through the west after his nomination. No man ever received such magnificent ovations all along the line. The streets of in- cinnatt were blocked with People anxious to honor the great editor. Although he was overwhelmingly defeated the reception accorded him was such that a king could have been proud of it.” « —>__. SQUARING UP WITH JUSTICE. A Man Who Was Willing to Suffer That Justice Be Done. The Texas judge was giving The Star re- porter a few wild steers, 80 to speak, on fhe manners and customs of the people of his greatest and second to none state in the glorious galaxy of the Union, or words to that effect. And the reporter was ob- | Serving at the same time how unlike the judge was in this respect to any and all Texans he had met. “Speaking of tenderfeet,” said the judge with proper judicial dignity, “Hiram Hoo- ten, who came to my county when I was a@ young man, was the rarest specimen I ever met up with. Hiram had a twang to his speech, a good deal like an Indiana Yankee, when he first came to the county, but the Texas climate softened that of its angularities, so that at the last we did not care where he came from, scme reason never told us. The things that Hiram did in the way of honesty were too numerous to meption, and his simplicity of character was really painful, especially when one of our citizens sold him a farm for $00 that nobody in the county would have at any price. Hiram, however, never complained and he managed somehow to make a living on his farm, which some of cur people could not do on better ones. He had also managed somehow to have a little money in bank, and, notwithstanding his Bullelessness, it was not considered safe toward the last to monkey with Hiram in @ horse trade. Still every now and then he would do a fool thing, and the next round some of our best men would be after Hiram for a chance to catch him napping in some kind of a trade, and Hiram would be found wide awake. One day Hiram was in the sheriff's office paying his taxes, and he in- sisted that it wasn’t justice to the tax- payers of the county that he should pay taxes on his farm, which was assessed at only $250, He sald it ought to be twenty- five hundred, at least, and the sheriff began to think Hiram had another one of his fits, and the next thing he knew he would have to have a trustee appointed to look out for lim. However, Hiram prevailed upon him to use his good offices in having the proper figures put on the farm, and Hiram was greatly comforted when he was Informed that next year his taxes would be on the increased valuation. Then Hiram went off about his business, smiling, and the sheriff met him next day, and in a small horse and cattle trade Hiram came out a pair of mules abead, and the sheriff didn’t know what hurt him. But he thought he would get in on Hiram before he had recovered from his fit in the cause of justice. For five or six months Hiram went along about as usual, and the neighbors didn’t notice anything peculiar until he began to white- wash his barns and fences, and he must have wasted as much as $4 improving the lcoks of things. Then one day a tidy sort of a man came to the sheriff's office with Hiram, and they looked over the books, and the stranger seemed to be satisfied with what he saw and hadn't a word to say to anybody. A week later he came around again, and this time Hiram came to me to draw up the deeds and transfer the prop- erty to the stranger, the price being $3,000 for the farm as it stood, in cash. It was enly $00 above the assessed valuation, and the stranger thought he was getting a snap. I never said a word, for Hiram had given me a $0 fee, and it wasn’t my place te talk. A day after the new man took possession, Hiram left the county, and the stranger told the sheriff in confidence that he had known Hiram back In Indiana, and he was always considered just a little slack- i, and the sheriff grinned and called the attention of the stranger to the fact that Hiram Hooten had increased the tax- able valuation of that farm from $2) to $2,500 for nothing on earth but simple justice.” —— AN ACCOMMODATING EDITOR. He Tried to Fill a L Felt Want by Accommodating Everybody. The hotel clerk had introduced The Star reporter to a guest with the pleasant hint that the visitor might have something to impart in the nature of information, but the clerk was mistaken. At all events the reporter got nothing and he fell back upon the clerk. “Who is he?” he inquired. “An editor,” replied the clerk “Truly a great distinction, but is he great as an editor as well as @ mere ma’ “They think so In his state. “What state?” “Ohio or Indiana. ter. “What is his act? What does he do that entitles him to credit?” “Nothing now, but some time ago, about when you were a kid,” and the clerk be- aime patronizing, “he had a daily news- paper in a@ thrifty ttle city out there somewhere, and he had so many subserib- ers who knew better how to run a news- paper than he did— “Just as they always the reporter. “That he concluded he would give them all a whack at it,” continued the cierk. “So he announced that he 1 be pleased to receive suggestions in person or by let- ter, and on the following Wednesday week he would issue the paper according to the changes recommended. The first sugees. tion was from a woman, who said she didn’t want any politics in her paper, and Look on the regis- do,” interrupted he knocked that department out. Then somebody else objected to the sporting news and that went. Then a sporting man didn’t want any church or religious news, and that was knocked out. Then a man kicked because he wasn't getting : th of reading because there were too many advertisements, and #0 on and so on, of all objections, and when the paper was the editor making due notice made up on the appointed Wednesday there wasn’t a lne of matter in it. I deed, there ‘t any printing at all im the forms except the heading of the paper, and the editur was feeling pretty goo! on that score anyhow. Et was approuch- ing the hour of going to press when his wife came tripping into the office. A dainty, sweet, helpful woman she was, but just a woman all the same, and she Was curious to know about what the pa- per would be like, for the editor was ke: ing that part of it a secret. She came into his sanctum and picking up a paper of the day before she was glancing through it casually as people do when they have nothing else to do and are walt- ing for a train to start or the man ahead to get out of the barber's chair, when she unconsclously sighed: “Well, T think this paper has the ugliest head I ever saw. I wonder why Henry keeps it.” Then it occurred to her that Henry wes after just such suggestions from his eub scribera and she wouldn't for the world have let him know what she thoneht So she choked the sigh down suddenly and looked around the office to see if Henry Was anywhere rear. She only hear? a door slam in the hack part of the bulld!: and with a breath of relief she settled back in her chair again to wait for the paper of the day before and a request for Streets and on the counter and th Wasn't a line of print anywhere about it. Never a line, and when the edfior came up and found his wife waiting he smiled The next day he had an editorial on the paper of the day before and a request for the names of { who had no further suggestions to and behold, on the following day hix wife’s name led the list, and she vowed he never sent it in to him. Just the same it was a fine lesson in practical newsp: making for all his people, and after that they attended to their own business while he atiended to theirs and his too, and now he ts rich and respectable and as who is still on earth. > FREE TRADER. py as a man can be HUNG THE And None Have Since Been Heard of in That County. A well-known Washingon politician made @ trip recently through southwestern West Virginia in order*to ascertain the senti- ment of that section. in Logan county, on Panther creek, he found an old man whom he interviewud as follow: “Are the men here taking much interest in the campaign this year?” “Right smart. “How are they going to vote?” "Ag'in’ the fed'ral co’t.” h the money question?” bout It. What they want is ter keep thar lan’ in the King case, Thet feller King is arter all th’ lan’ hvar. Ain't never no money here, an’ we don’ keer much "bout no questions as to 1t.” ut the tariff?” “The what?” “Are there any free traders in your dis- trict?” “No, I reckon not. Thar was one las’ but ched ‘im. He'd been all ‘round hyar. Sol’ one o’ mine to a feller down th’ crick. 1 foun’ it an’ we hung the free trader right over yander on thet big poplar. Hajn't heerd 0’ none sence.” He Knew Them. From the Chicago Times-Heraid. An old gentleman, meeting his grandson, said to him in an impressive tone of voice! “My dear boy, I hear some very discour- aging reports about you. They say that you go behind the scenes and are very much gone on Miss Topsie Liftoe. Is that so?” “Yes, grandpa, to some extent.” “Drop them, my boy. I know them, my son. They ere a bad lot.” ‘But, grandpa, the actresses of the pres- ent day are different from what they were when you were a young man, fifty yeart “Not much, my boy. They are mostly the same identical actresses. Why, I was en- gaged once to Miss Topsie Liftoe myself.”