Evening Star Newspaper, April 18, 1896, Page 14

THE pai EVENING ‘STAR, SATURDAY, ‘APRIL 18 1896-TWENTY-FOUR PAGES. Mbp oii eA A clerk in the redemption division of the Treasury Depertment says that the “clean- est" paper money in circulation is that which circulates in Washington, while the dirtiest is that which comes in from Chi- cago for redemption. St. Louis is a close seccnd to Chicago, and Cincinnati next. ~ New York is next to Waskington In the record fer clean money, Philadelphia next, while timore ranks rext to Cincinnati | for having dirty money. The money that comes in from Chicago, besides being dirty is always much mutilated, so much so, he Said. “that there is twice ss much time consumed in patching it up prior to can- cellation as there fs in counting it.” * eK “I de not know how to explain It," ob- tved a regular rider on the 14th street cable road, “but I have never yet heard a conductor pronounce the full name of Rhode Island avenue. They call out Diland avenue Invariably, putting the emphasis on the Di every. time. As I am a Rhode Island man, I do not like to hear the name contracted into Diland. Up our way we are always particular to pronounce the Rhode.” xe eK KK OK “While in Geneva some months 2go,” said Col. J. R: Reynolds, “I visited the princi- pal watch works there and as a matter of curiosity asked the manager what was the hest price watch that was made in Gen- eva. He said that the most expensive watch turned out in Switzerland was worth $700. This watch kad a split second hand struck the hcurs if needed. It also a tiny musical box, which played stinct tunes. This watch, he said, finest that could be made, but that ents, diamonds, ete., could be worked into the ca. ‘ch would run the price up into as many thousands as the pur- chaser desired. He 1 there had been one blishment the c: 3 eh had been studded with diamonds hich cost $17.00), but as far as the elf was concerned it was a $700 | and of w watch.” *e eK * “In early days," remarked an old citizen, e finest snipe shooting about Washing- along @ stream that ran through the square bounded by M, K, 16th and 17th *. The sand banks were numerous, ‘med to prefer to feed to going out to the ‘slashes,’ which was the term used for the entire northern part of the city from 15th street west to Re fetown. Black birds ed to prefer, forty Years ago, and even in more recent years, to congregate on the hills whica is now ite of the Louise Home, on Massachu- 5 avenue and 15th street. I have shot many a bag full of reed birds in the local- where are now standing fine residences street between 16th and Sth ton +. ke * - “There may be a reason for it that Ido E said Representative John- sut Washington is peculiar in regard signs of for rent or for sale on un- Occupied ho I have not been in need of a house, and have not suffered In con- Sequence, but I have thought about it con- however. For rent signs are in some sections of the city, nee have I been able to the price asked for the if I took the trouble to owners, ¥ could find would be a conve- ng houses if the d was added to ils in many other ot understand why the estate agent, who is ng, does not adopt it. quently advertise the, ing or selling price in the yut never on the houses them- ee * KOK frequently trolling their beats,” go to sleep was the in- n volunteered by a well-known member of the police force, “especially during t couple of hours that precede daylight. have no idea of hoodling, either. Only a short time ago I knew of an officer whose beat did not extend south of Pennsylvania avenue on while lith street, asleep, walked all the way t street to the Long bridge. »ke he was within ten feet of »tive coming across the bridge, and who, do When h a locc Was so frightened that he did not find his Way back for nearly an hour. I know of another and heard the story from the off self, who wandered all the et from 5th street north- He got all mixed tually had to ask was before he could ‘ back to his b Of course, 5 occasionally who settle et snooze, but the cases I > who actually and with- tion or desire go asleep while % about. xe * we y clerks once fndulged in a mild kind of gambling,”’ was the contribution of an old Treasury Department clerk toward the entertainment of a few friends, ‘ton the internal revenue receipts, and many a dol- lar has been-won and lost by those who tried to guess nearest what the receipts would be. But this is all changed now, the fad for the fellows who are not content unless they are risking something on their judgment is placing small bets on t bic the number of bicycles the express wagons will contain as they pass up and down 15th i Nine out of every ten express ns have bicycles on them these days, all the way from one to five, though often they carry a full load. An outsid-. cannot tmagine the amount of fun the clerks get from this kind of betting. A few days a clerk who has been remarka"ly suc- ful ir his betting, was caught cheat- » had a man stationed on top x an building, who saw the e of looking glass » eXact number to the man in the treas- build The scheme, however, could Tre! ; | got up and the two vacant places gave her orked in the afternoon, after the sun © ed the meridian. In the morning hours he had to depend on luck, but in the atternodn he had what the boys call a cir on the gz J” a simple incident in its way, but esting,” remarked a well-known ‘and attracted the attention of hundrcds of people during the day. What I fer to was the suicide or accidental ng of a sparrow on Sunday last, in h of string that still hangs from ce of ¢ house on 3d street north- st above B street. My atten- tion was attracted by the unusual amount of chattering of a number of sparrows who d_to be much excited by the occur- re birds held a kind of a council on the matier, and then divided themselves e parties and went to work in earnest in their unsuccessful efforts ew off the strands of the string that the unfortunate bird tightly around ck. At times during the day there is many fifty persons gathered ing the effo: of the birds. All kinds athy was expressed, but no relief be extended. Shortly after noon it arent that the sparrow was dead, i the efforts of the birds were kept I nearly sundown.” * * * Ok * Going up Pennsylvania avenue the other day was a densely packed herdic. She was yeung and pretty, but weighed something hike 200. A lanky young man arose and of- fered her his seat. She looked at the nar- Tew space and blushed. Then another man rcom. “That reminds me,” said .a, man sitting near where a Star reporter was standing, “of a story Bill Nye used to tell. I have forgotten whether he ever wrote It, but anyhow it is good. Nye said that when he was traveling in England the avoirdupois of the English housewife was one thing that attracted his attention: -When she went to get in public conveyances of any kind she was puffing “and biowing -before she sat down, owing to the little exertion caused by climbing into the conveyance. He said that it is not the habit of English- men to offer seats to women standing, but that his Americanism always asserted it- self, and he would invariably offer his seat. Several times, instead of receiving thanks, he got only scowls. One day he was in a crowded vehicle when an unusually stout woman climbed in. She looked as if on the point of collapsing, and as if unable to stand up. Then Nye’s humor came to the front. ‘Gentlemen,’ he-said to the mule passengers, ‘I will be one of three to give this lady a seat.’ There-was a suppressed ckuckle from all sides of the vehicle, but the lady scowled at- Nye in her. fiercest Tanner and answered, ‘I wouldn't have it, sir. I don't need three seats.’ "” = © & * Judge Culberson and Judge Abbott of Texas are inseparable cronies. Wherever one is to be seen in the House or in the lobbies or restaurant there the other will be found. They sit near each other in the House. They go everywhere together, and consult with each other on almost every- thing. They leave the House together in the afternoon and, arm in arm, stroll slow- ly along, talking in low, soft tones. It is a matter of general comment among old at- taches cf the House that they have never seen two men more attached to each other. Both were for years on the Texas bench. a Ee EARLY SPRING SNAKE STORY. The Remarkable Achievements of a Farm Hand in Getting Bit. When the editor of the crank department of The Star looked up from his desk to recognize his visitor he failed at first in recognition, but after a minute it came to him all right. “How are you?” he said, heartily. “What's the geod wocd in Loudoun, and what the mischief have you done with your whiskers?” “Mowed ‘em,”” smiled the visitor."‘Spring’s about got here and I didn’t need ‘em. But I haven't got any time to vaste. I come in on my way to the train to tell you of a queer snake story up our way.” ‘ “Isn't it u little early for snake stories?” suggested the editor. ' “Yes, for this year’s crop, but this one Is a last year’s ons, that I just found out about yesterday.” “Then tt must be true. Go ahead with it. Take a chair, won't you?" 7 “No, I'll stand, so’s to be reedy to start when I've finished. You see last year I bad a hired hand on the farm that I never seen till the day he asked for work. I needed a hand purty bad, and I took him right in without a word except to tell him that if he got drunk I'd turn him off. He said he wasn’t a drinking man and he went right to work in the hay field. He wasn't the best worker I ever hired, but he was steady and we got along all right till the fourth day he was with me. That day I was in the barn, and I heard a yell, and I run to the dour znd seen my hired man flying around the field as If the old serpent rimself was after him. When he seen me he headed my way, and as he went past me I could see a short, stumpy, mottled snake hanging to his leg at the ankle. He dew around the barn, yelling at every jump, and I took after him and caught him in a clump of woods about two hundred yards from the barn, where he had drop- ped, plumb tuckered Sut. When I got to him the snake was gone, but the marks of testh were on his leg, and I hustled to the house and got a quart bottle of liquor TF keep for snake bites, and other household purposes, and soon had him loaded down to the guards). He was sober by next morning and ail right, and the day after he went to work again. He stayed with me a month after that and left wher I had ro work fo> him, and I tell u that in the four or five weeks I had him’ that st.ake caught him that same way six times, and to save our necks we could never find the snake. Some- times {t would nab him. by the hand when he was workin’ in the weeds, and some- times it would catch him in one place and sometimes in another, but it would always bang on and he. would‘run and yeli and me after him. “Now for the queer part,” said the vis- itor, taking a final spurt. “The other day 1 was grubbin’ out that clump of bushes and, by hok I seen a snake, and before it could move I stuck my grubbin’ hoe through it and dragged it out, and durn my buttons, come to look at it, it wasn't noth- in’ but a rag snake, painted. I carried it up to the house and as scon as my boy seen it he whooped, and said {t was the same snake that had becn feedin’ on my hired man all last harvest, and I reckon the boy was righ. The editor gave the visitor a gentle haw haw. “That's all right,” sat the visitor, mov- ing away, “but just let that chap try to git work with me this year; if he don’t wish that that was a genuine copperhead, eee I ain't no judge of what I'll do to ‘im."” ee Mark Twain on Prohibition. From the Westminster Gazette. Mark Twain has just concluded a lectur- ing tour in New Zealand. He sald good- bye to the New Zealanders at Christ- church, and in the course of his speech made reference to prohibition, which he said he approved, but which would put them into most difficult straits. He then told the following story: In our country several years ago there Was a man who came into a prohibited town, and, unlike you savages here, they said to him, “You can’t get a drink any- where except at the apothecary’s.” So he went to the apothecary, wno said, “You can't get a drink kere without a prescrip- tion from the physician,” but the man said, “I am perishing. I haven't time to get a prescription.” The apothecary re- plied, “Well, L haven't power to give you a drink, except for snake bite.” The man said, ‘Where's the snake?” So the apoth- ecary gave him the snake's address, and he went off. Soon after, however, he came back and said, “For goodness sake, give me a drink. That snake is engaged for six months ahead.’ ————_-e-—_______ Family Jar. From the Chicago Tribune. ‘The old hen flew from her nest and cack- led loud and long. “When eggs are nine cents a dozen,” sald the old rooster, eyeing the performance with languid disapproval, “it is a ridiculous exhibition of vanity to make all that fuss over one egg. ——+$—_+e-+-—____ Easter Maneuvers. From the Sketeh, Perplexed Umpire (who has lost his men)— “Have you gentlemen happened to sée such @ thing as an army about?” /ALKALI IKE AND HIS TOWN “Concerted action will accomplish much which is beyond the ability of individuals, | cperating independently, to effect,” re- marked the high-browed tourist, apropos of some now unimportant observation of a member of the little group of prominent Hawvillains with whom he was fraterniz- ing. “Shore thing!” acquiesed Colonel Handy Polk, a trifle grandiloquently. “Ad astra per infinitum, you know. Them words is Latin, gentlemen, an’ means ‘United we.| stand, divided we fall.’ * “That sorter reminds me,” said Alkali Ike, who was in a reminiscent mood, “of the time it rained, up in Tcnganoxile, some years ago. In some ways the story kinder jibes with Mr, Eastman’s observation, an’, in other ways it don’t. Tell you how it was:” Nobody could offer any val!d objections, and so he began: “Thar is a drouth, the time I'm livin’ up thar in Tongzroxie, which has continnered so long that everybody tut the prohibi- tionists Is a heap worried. The crops is parched in the fields, cattle {s sufferin’ an’, bellerin’ hoarsely for water, an’ everything is arid a plenty. Things is looking mighty, despondent, an’ so, when it has got so far along that a man has to carry a bottle of water to prime himself with before he can spit to do any good an’ the catfish is kick- in’ up sech a dust in the bed of the creek that you can’t see across it, the board of de takes the matter in hand. “The Tonganoxie board of trade is plumb up to the times, in them days—strictly fong de swizzle, as they say in the east—an’ a mighty sage an’ businesslike band, any way you look at ‘em. This yere organiza- tion is the ‘board of trade on Fridays an’ the Jim-a-long Club all the rest of the week, an’ no gtass growin’ up betwixt its toes, any of ‘he time. “Its occupation is lookin’ after the-wel- fare an’ advancement of the town, encour- agin’ immigration, givin’ social dances; git- tin’ up celebrations, officiatin’ at lyncnins’, carin’ for the poor, runain’ out superfluous persons, regulatin’ giddy folks an’ bein’ a regular old Dutch uncle to the community in general. I'm a memb>r of it, myself, and some of the stiffest little games of poker an’ prettiest gun plays that I ever had the pleasure of minglin’ in occurs durin’ some of the sessions of the board. “Thar has been prayers for rain goin’ on for some time; some of the business men {s in favor of sendin’-off for the rain makers, an’ others take no stock In a mechanical Provider.ce, so to speak; some folks want one thing, an’ some another; the oldest in- habitant is pokin’ around that nothin’ is no. good an’ prognosticatin’ about the ter- rible drouth of eighteen-hundred-an-suthin’; the calamity howlers ts yawpin’ an’ pecky. eckyin’ on general principles; the farmers an’ claimholders is threatenin’ to go back to their wives’ folks in Injianny; the in- fidels is swearin’ shameful; an’ so on. Some advocates this, an’ some that, an’ all of ‘em mekes a great hvobly-boobly, which accomplishes nothin’, “As I'm sayin’, the board of trade is a heap businesslike body, an’ we holds a powwow an’ offers a bonus of $300 for a good big soakin’ rain, makin’ no restric- tions or specifications as to who fetches it or how it shall be done. It 1s simply bring on your rain an’ come up to the captain's olfice and git your money. We circulates handbills to this effect, an’ directly the good work begins. ‘wo different sets of rain makers put in appearance, set up rival shops, an’ begin for to shoot anvils or suthin’, send up bal- loons, burn stinkin’ chemicals an’ make a great hooraw generally, accordin’ to their methods an’ preferences. The church peo- ple an’ the Salvation Army start to holdin’ rival prayer meetin’s an’ is shore active aa’ oe a plenty in their appeals for rain, “An old bull Injun comes in from the wil- derness, rigs him a wickyup on the hill an’ commences for to make rain medicine by the wholesale’ with sech implements as a tom-tom, a gourd rattle, a diseased imag- ination an’ long howls. Wun Ting Lung, formerly of Hong Kong, burns joss Sticks | an’ so forth, down in his washee-washee, | an’ twists the tall of his prayer machine without ceasin’. 4 “The lodges, the alliance an’ the Sabbath, school holds picnics: every day, hopin’ to fetch rain that-a-way on the homypathic principle. An’ all the little boys in the com- munity whirls in an’ goes to killin’ snakes and tufnin’ of *em upside down, confident that sech action would shortly fetch rain. “Wal, bime-bye, the united efforts of all these yere various persons an’ things pro- duced results, an’ it rained. It not only rained, but it more than rained; it rainei cats an’ dogs an’ pitchforks with the tines down—an’ then some. It poured down in tawrents an’ cattyracts an’ floods an’ cloud- bursts. It durn n drowned everything out an’ so continnered for de Tt hailed at intervals an’ pounded the veggytation flat, raised knots as big as goose exes on prominent citizens’ heads, broke rabbits’ backs an’ brained a few babies, or a little suthin’ that-a-way. As often as once in every twenty-four hours it thunderec an’ lightened like fury, an’ struck in more than forty places altogether. An’ along towards the last, a cyclone tore loose an’ blowed about half of the town away. An all the time, whether it was hailin’ or thunderin’ or blowin’ or not, it went right on rainin’ like a man pourin’ in buckwheat. “Directly, everything was flooded. The wells were filled till the water stuck clear up out of the top. Thar ‘peared to be no doubt about it—we had got rain, an’ the board of trade patted itself on the back a heap congratulatory. “Then, the question nacherally arose,who deserved the credit an’ the thre hundred dollars? Everybody who had had any- thing to de with tryin’ to fetch rain hopped right up an’ claimed the reward. Yere they come, the two gangs of professional rain makers, the fclks who had prayed, the old bull Injun, Wun Ting Lung, the alll- ance, the lodges, the Sabbath school, an’ every other Tom, Dick an’ Harry who had been in any way mixed up in the competi- tion, splattin’ an’ paddlin’ over through the weter, an’ every cussed bugger of ‘em de- mandin’ the premium right now an’ de- nouncin’ everybody else who claimed it. “The bocrd of trade holds a powwow an’ makes a heap 97 smcke, an’ then the High Duke gocs cut an’ makes cration to the eager people standin’ thar in the mud an’ Water with the rain pourin’ down their backs. He tells "em that the board is ready anj willin’ to pay the reward to who- ever has earned it, an’ they all sets up a great yell of ‘Me! i “Yere, now! says the High Duke. ‘If all of you folks made this rain the prize will be divided amongst you; {f only one of you ts responsible the money belongs to him. Thrash it out amongst yourselves an’ send the lucky man around for his money.’ “Upon that, them thar candidates for the prize fell upon each other like wolves. Their friends tcok sides, an’ it was ‘Hoo- raw, boys. hooraw!’ loud enough to wake the dead. An’ it kept on rainin’. “Next dash out of the box, yere comes a Passel of farmers sloppin’ in an’ hoarsely demandin’ to know what about their crops that ts washed away an’ their hogs that Is drowred, an’ their calves that has sucked in thunder an’ is now hopeless idiots, simi- lar to dudes? It looks like to them that if people got pay for makin’ it rain the same people ort to be libel to pay for the dam- age that was done by the said rain. If not, the board of trade was responsible, havin’ instigated the outrage. At any rate, they all agreed that they'd be gol-dummed! An’ it continnered to rain. “Directly, yere bobs up a critical cuss an’ wants to know, if it is a fair question, who's goin’ to stop the rzin, an’ if {t hain’t about time for the guilty party to be a- doin’ of it, an’ so on. It gces right on rainin’. “By this time the board of trade has got a bad case of the jerks. It tears its hair an’ begins for to wall its eyes an’ pick at the bed clothes. Everything 1s drowned cut, everybody is wranglin’ an’ fightin’, the farmers is mutterin’ about suin’ for dam- ages, an’ the dickens 1s to pay generally. Besides which, it is still rainin’, “The beerd of trade got drunk an’ left the town to its fate an’ the question to set- tle itself. It got thunderin’ drunk. It packed in an ample supply of licker, locked the door, drove a nail in the keyhole an’ flung the hammer out of the winder. It stayed drunk for two days an’ a night, or two nights an’ a day—I never knowed which—an’ was dead to the world an’ the carkin’ ceres tharof. Durin’ the interval the contestants for the prize advanced from words to blows, an’ from blows to shootin,’ but the board of trade didn’t know nuthin’ about it till later. The cyclone, which I mentioned a spell ago, tore half of the town up by the rocts, but the board wasn't aware of it. “Wall, when the time had passed an’ the |" lcker was gone an’ the board had got back to earth an’ Its cares again, an’ had broke Gown the docr an’ come forth, thay were a mighty hectic an’ feverish lot, similar to boils. Everything was float, the town half wrecked, the rain still fallin’, an’ every now an’ then a puff of smoke would poot out of the windewibf the parsonage or some other bufidin’, betokenin’ that some gent who thought had made the rain was poppin’ away-al! some other gent who be- lieved himselB deservin’ ef the credit. Wun Tin Igimg was poundin’ his gong in helpless fury,dqwn in his washee-washee, an’ up on the hill the old bull Injun had svrrounded a'ghlicn or go of firewater an’ ‘was enjoyin* +a! mighty lurid: ghost dance all by himself, 1An’, as Isaid before, it was sul] rainin’... + “We seen that it was plumb high fime to wind up the Whole blamed business right whur it was 4%. Accordin’, we purseeded in this wise: We gave the professional rain- makers fifteen gminutes. to pack up their dunnage an’ tear out for pastures new an shot at 'em ‘times as they went. We quieted tha Pasfor down by bendin’ a gun ever his head, an’ rode the captain of the Salvation A: ut of town on the top side of a saw-edged’ rail. We shot up the old bull Injun g plenty, an’ flung Wun Tin poi | shanty ijito the creek with him in- side of it. 4 “We lynched’ a few folks-—I don’t ricky- lect Who, now—busted up the lodges an’ disrupted the alllarce. We announced that ary little boy that was ketched killin’ a snake an’ turnin’ {t wrong side up would be forced to eat it. An’ then we made loud proclamation for anybody that claimed the credit for the rain to come forrard an’ take treatment. We gave it out red-hot that we had lynchin’s to fit anybody who didn’t like our by gosh way of doin’. Then peace an’ harmony reigned, an’ by the time we were ready to rest from our labors it stopped rainin’. “An’ that was the last an’ ultimate time that anybody in Tonganoxle ever tried to make rain.”* E — ne 2 PROTECTING HIS WIFE. A Husband Who Settled Things in a Lasting Fashion, A Star reporter was walking along New Jersey avenye--last Sunday with an ac- quaintance of his, a man of fifty or upward, when their attention was attracted by a woman trying to coerce her son, a lad of fourteen or fifteen, into ‘obedience. She wanted the youngster to go in the house, ard he refused, whereupon she took hold of shim and ke bé@gan to fight her. In a minute the reporter's companion was alongside and he had the boy by the collar shaking him. The mother, instead of taking up the fight on behalf of the boy, as some mothers would have done, thanked the man, and the boy Icllowed her into the huuse. “Phat was a risky thing you did,” said the reporter, when his companion rejoined him. “It's a wonder you didn’t have to fight the woman. “I know how those things are," he laugh- ed, “but I can’t help helping the woman, 1 don’t care what the results may be.” “Most men, I ‘think, feel that way, but most men are wise enough to keep their hands off of 4 family row.” “Let me tell you how I learned not to,’ said the man; “or, perhaps, rather learned to respect a mother. I was an only son, an only child, in fact, and naturally I was spoiled. My father dled when I was about fifteen, leaving a very nice property to my mother. She was foolish about me and let me have my own way and as much money as she could spare. Sometimes more than that, but it was all the same to me—I biew in all I could get and wanted more. I was polite enough to other women, but like a good many spoiled bo it did not occur io me that my mother ould be treated by j me as I treated other women. v‘It wasn't that I was lacking in the sense of gallantry, for I was not; it only seemed to me that.she waS my mother and I had a boy's right.to be impolite and rude to her. When I was about twenty-four or tive, I had improved, yery little, and my mother still treated mé,as a boy, and I was ruder than ever, for I needed more money and she couldn’f give it to me. Well, about this time she married again; one of the nicest men that ever lived ne was, too, and rich. At first he was. quite liberal with me, but yhen he foundjout what kind of a chap I was, and how I treated my mother, he let up on that, and began to lecture me on my conduct. ‘didn't pay any attencon to his advice, and one day, after he had been my step-father about a year, he cal.ed me into his office for angther tall. I muy say here Le was abgut sixty, very gentl?, at least fifteen. pounds lighter than I-was and three inches less.in helght. A “ ‘Now, John,’-he said, when he had shut the door and lucked it, ‘I want to settle this business with you fgp gcod and all. I've talked to you about your conduct to,your mother, what a boy owed to his mother and all that, aul you paid no, attention; then I tried to talk you inte a chivalrous feeling for her as a man showhl have for a woman, and you paid no attention.. This morning you acted toward her worse than ever. Now, I want you to understand this in a Gifferent light. You are a man and I am. That lady is my wife, aad’¥ allow no man to treat my wife as you have treated her, and I propose to thrash you for it just as I would any other man under the same cumstances, Throw your cont.’ “But why dwell on the painful scene that fellowed?”” laughed the reporter's compan- jon. “I never in my Nfe got such a ter- rific licking, and from that day forward the respect, deference and gallantry I show- ed to the old gentleman's wife was really beautiful. That's the way it began, but it wasn't long till I felt toward her as a man should feel toward his mother, notwith- standing how much she spoiled him, and till the day of her death T never lacked in courtesy to. her; and as for her husband, well, I was ready to back him against all comers,” . - + a The Tragedy of a Dejected Patriot. From the Buffalo Express. @ “Madam,” said the tattered wretch, as the woman of the house came to the door, “you see before you a victim of the worst goveriumental tyranny on the face of the Blobe.”* “You look it,” answered the woman. My looks do not deceive you. ¥ mad- am, I can assure you tha: it humbles me greatly to be compiled to ask alms of you. Two short months ago, madam, I was rich enougn to have bought all the houses on this street.” “Indeed,’ said the woman. growing in- terested. _ “Yes,” pursued the wanderer. “I had a great plantation, acres of sugar cane and tobacco, hundreds of negroes to do my bid- ding. I spent my time in luxury. I aever had a want that I could not yralify by a waye of my hand.” “Where was all this?” “In Cuba, madam. I am a Cuban refugee. My plantation was burned by the cruel Spaniards, because I had given aid to the patriots. My wife and children were mur- dered, my dependents all scattered, and Sain “If you're a Cuban,” interrupted the wo- man, “prove It by talking Spanish.” “Madam,” said the tramp, with a pained expression, “in the part of Cuba where I lived the people were such patriots that they never used Spanish. They talked only English.” : “Oh,” said the woman, “‘there’s one other way in which you can prove wnat you say.” “It is humiliating to me to have my word doubted. My. Cuban pride revolts again it, but my hunger for the mince pie w: I can smell from your kitchen forces me to pocket imy pride. Name your other iest and it shall be fulfilled.” i “You might walk Spanish,” sald the wo- man, with:a smile, as she shut the docr. +—__—+e0 ‘| Am Experience, _ From Life. * a Lieut. Peri—I am afraid you couldn’t stand the,rigar of an arctic expedition. You_ never have been on one before, have ou?" » ° *Travolesd'Nos. but I have spent a winter in an English hotel. o+____ Dispatch prom the Next War. From Truth,; It During the charge Captain Dean had three bicycles shot under him, ART AND ARTISTS There will be on exLibition at Veerhoff’s gallery next week a collection recently shown in New York,which comprises study heads in crayon and pastel by A. M. Tur- ner, Frederick Marshall and the late W. R. Allen, but is of most interest on account of the old Dutch pairtirgs cn wood which it includes. The history of these is an inter- esting one. A year or so ago, when the.old Park Schicss, near Brussels, was being torn down, a curio hunter, judging it ‘a rare opportunity to obtain some valuable art treasures, found his way to the spot, and secured among other things ~these Dutch pictures. There were a score or more of them, painted on oak panels, set into the walls of the banqueting hall, and though they bear no mark or signature, but as the castle was built at the time when Teniers and Meyndert Hobbema, re- sided in the neighborhood, there is reason for belleving that they were the work of these macters. The pictures themselves seem to bear out this theory, as they are scenes of simple every-day life, such az those men were most fond of painting, and, rich in color and_ strong in_ composition, would be no discredit to the artists. To follow this exhibition there wiil probably be one from Philadelphia, containing draw- ings in pen and water color of noted gen- erals, and also several landscapes in water color. * * In her portraits of children, J. Mindeleff is especially successful, as is shown by a recently finlshed portrait of Mrs. Cam- eron’s little child, with its sweet, pensive face. Her likeness of Miss Maud Davidge has been much admired, and among other good portraits in water color is one of Mr. Worthingten Ford. Though her portrait work employs most of her time, Mrs. Min- deleff paints attractive flower pieces,and in- tends to spend some of her summer leisure in that line of work, and also in painting figure studies. * x * Four new members were elected to the eclety of Washington Artists at the meet- ing on Tuesday evening—Chas. H. Poor, Sig. G. Trentanove, Wm. H. Coffin and Anna M. Stank Miss Stanley is the fourth woman admitted to membership un- der the new dispensation, Bertha E. Perrie, Jane Bridgham Curtis and Katherine Critcher having been admitted to the so- ciety at the last meeting. These women will certainly be a credit to the organiza- tion, and the members will have no cause to regret their recent decision in favor of eiving them. Among other business transacted, the executive committee pre- ted a favorable report concerning the xth annual exhibition, which it deemed, wconsidering the hard times, to be as suc- cessful as could be expec penses having been more than covered by » of catalogues. A permanent li- mittee was appointed to super- d the expenditure of a smail appro- tion in art periodicals and literature of that character, It was voted also that the sketch class be discontinued. * * * Mr. W. H. Chandlee has of late been turning much attention to the study of mil- itary subjects, and has made copies of sev- eral of the paintings by De Neuville and Detaille, probably the two greatest moc painters of army life. He plans to considerable time at Fort Myer in making studies of the garriscn life there. * * * In a view of the negro market at Lynch- burg, Mr. F. J. Fisher treats quite well the rather difficult problems of grouping a large number of figures and of giving an effect of light and sunshine to the scene. Mrs. Fisher has been working on an inter- esting still life subject, containing a blue Vase and eral gorgeous peacock feath- dhe an Jones, the daughter ator J a begun work on pic- tures of “Spring,” for which a model is posing in the studio. * * ‘Though but few of cur local artists are represented "at the big exhibition now in rrogress in New York, their share is quite creditable. At the Society of American Artists,Miss Elizabeth Curtis exhivits three pictures, all executed in her strongly im- rrersionistic manner. They ate, however, Doth true in effect and pleasing to the eye, 2g merits which even the enemies of impressionism are compelled to acknowl- edge. Mer “Autumn” and “Late After- noou” are especially admired. George W jioughby Maynard, who, born in this city and spending his early life here, may be in some sense considered a Washington artist, shows a splendid color study, entitled “Bac- chante.” The mass of grape leaves which falls around the bare shoulders of the wo- man and serves as a background for the head, harmonizes admirably with the deli- cate flesh tints, and the picture has been attracting a great deal of attention. The late Thomas Hovenden, whose tragic death is still fresh in the minds of many, ts rep- resented at the society by a small canvas called “A Cosy Corner,” showing a little boy curled up on the hearth with the ruddy glow from the fire lighting up his face. At the National Academy of Design, Mr. Ho- venden's large painting, “The Founders of a State,” is exhibited. A party of emi- grants have halted their train of canva covered ons at the long-sought-for spot, and from the nearest of the “prairie schooners” a sturdy couple have alighted, and are surveying their new surroundings. Though unfinished, there is in it the germ of a great picture, one of those distinctively American pictures that have endeared the artist's work to the public. Mr. Hovenden did not spend his time in painting Norman peasants and scenes on the coast of Brit- tany, as so many American artists have dene, but painted the life with which he was most in sympathy, that of his native country, creating an art that will live. Mr. Robert Hinckley exhibits at the academy a good full length portrait of Major General Baird, his decorations and the brass buttons of his uniform lending a certain pictur- esqueness to the figure which is often wanting in portraits of ‘civilians. Max Weyl's landscape, “Potomac Marshes,” was hung on the line, and the same merits that have been admired here were seen and appreciated in New York. There is also at the exhibition of the academy a picture by Mr. J. A. Oertel, who has for some time been identified with the art of this city. It is entitled “The Sands o' Des,” and shows a woman hurrying along the sea shore, upon which a heavy surf is beating. Taken all in all, Washington may be said to be well represented at the exhibitions. ** Mrs. M. B. Gibbens has just completed a portrait of Mrs. Townes, the wife of Ed- ward Owens. Townes, who is the author of several well-known plays now on the boards, and she expects before long to start one of the playwright himself. An appro- priate screen, covered with little nautica! scenes and bits of floating seaweed, is des- tined to adorn her seaside home. x * By the decision of the Society of the Friends of Arts on Wednesdzy, Miss Anna Hunt was awarded the prize of $200 for her portrait of herself. There is solid serious work shown in it rather than any great brilliancy. Miss Pearl received the next largest number of votes on a portrait which was considered one of the most strik- ing there, from the easy original pose and the good technique. Miss Katherine Critcher’s portrait, which was third in popularity, was really only an excellent start, but if carried farther in the same vein, would probably have taken the prize. The drawing was very good, attention hay- ing been paid to the blocking of the planes, and the scheme of color pleasing, though a trifle monotonous. Wm. H. Coffin submit- ted a good portrait, and George Gibbs’ por- trait of himself in costume was admirable. Jane Bridgham Curtis and Juliet Thompson, either of whom would have done a masterly portrait in pzxstel, sent but indifferently well-painted canvases. Miss Gwynne C. Price of Chicago sent a very delicately drawn face with a sweet expression. Some violently impressionistic heads were sent in, some portraits with only leanings in that direction. Among the latter was one in greenish hues, by Mary W. Bonsall of Philadelphia, carrying with it a conviction that it is a good likeness. The shimmer of the green silk dress was very cleverly brought out in it. The exhibition was con- tinued on Thursday, and attracted a large number of people, on account of the odd- ity of the competition. The collection fs an amusing dhe én account of the mixture of the god, the mediocre and the very bad portraits there, but has probabiy as high B Standard of merit as could be expected under the--ciroumstances, ry ** ; Miss Daisy Brown has teen making quite @ protracted ‘stay in New York, but will re- turn, to this city as soon as she has com- pleted a full-length portrait which a well- known New Yorker has asked her to paint. * a * ok Max Weyl’s exhibition closes this week at Fischer's, and though not as many pic- tures have been sold as had been hoped, it has been artistically a success. The ef- fect of the pictures was greatly enhanced by the appropriate and handsome framing, and no pains have been spared in getting up. the exhibition. The color and atmos- phere always found in Mr. Weyl’s work are sircnger than ever, and he has improved in his treatment of skies. Next week Felix Bernardelli, the Brazilian, will show his collection of South American scenes, * * * Mr. U. 8. J. Dunbar is now at work on a large allegorical figure of “War.” The strong, sinewy figure of the young man is thoroughly an American type, and the sculptor is holding to that idea throughout the entire conception. Mr, Dunbar has about finished a good likeness of Robert Stockwell Hatcher, one of the reading clerks in the House. * * The recently organized Water Color Club has made arrangements to hold an early winter exhibition in the hall of the Cosmos ‘Club. It will be held in the week commenc- iug the 7th of December, and water -olors, tels and drawings in black and white be exhibited. The blanks are now in preparation, and those desiring them can -obtain them in a few days from Miss Lilian Cook,-the secretary of the club. * * Miss von Neselrode, a German artist of ecnsiderable note, who has been painting in this city for some time past, has recently erecuted a portrait of Mr. Charles Augustus Williams of 1301 13th street, that has elec- ited much favorable comment. It {s under- stood to be intended for the city hall in New London, of which city Mr. Williams is a native, and was for a time mayor. By his friends it is considered a striking like- ness, and is painted in a free and broad manner, w lient effects, tho’ perhaps the flesh tiats are less natural and trans- parent than could be desired. x * Mr. Hubert Vos, the eminent Dutch paint- er, who officially represented Holland at the Chicago exposition, has found this coun- try an appreciative and fruitful field ever since. It would be hard to tell how many portraits of Americans has been painted, but the number must run into the scores, and not a few have been of Washingtou- ians. At present he is ergaged on portraits of both Secretary and Mrs. Olney, and, it is understood, that he has other commis- sions here. FADS WHEELS, Silver is Being Employed in Orna- menting Bikes. In anticipation of the coming season some feshionables are now ordering wheels with silver adornments, handsome silver lamps and other accessories, The foundation of ihese wheels must al- Ways be stcel tubing, since the finer metals are too soft for the purpose; yet they may be made very beautiful, with silver tracery over the entire frame, the pedals, handle bars, saddle and tool bag fairly encrusted with silver ornamentation. The ends of the handle bar are sometimes made of ivo- while the skirt guard is laced with white silk cord. For these ornate wheels silver lamps are being prepared which will range in prices from $35 to $100, the latter style being im- Ledded with pearls. The cyclometers are made of nickei, with silver mountings, and on the handie bar is fastened a dainty sil- ver bracket, from which hangs a silver watch; price, $10. Toe clips will not be used with these machines. The entire out- fit wi it JAH), Still more handsomely decoi those just mentioned was a machine purchased for $550 by the wife of an English "hobleman. Notwithstanding the newspaper reports no gold whatever is being put upon wheels, As an experiment one wheel was entirel plated with gold, but with very unsatisfac- tory results, Our fashionables will trust themselves only on machines of solid metal. Each rider, -however, will have her mono- gram or crest on the silver name plate which is fastened to the frame. These plates can be secured at a very reasonable figure, and-are within the reach of every wheelwoman, There are other things, too, within the reach of the more humble cyclist; and while they are not quite so dainty as the luxuri- cus fittings just described, they are things which the sportswoman loves. Very ser- viceable lamps are now being gotten up in aluminum and bronze. They cost from $5.50 to $5, but are guaranteed not to jar out—a temper-saving improvement. There are toe clips, also, for the girl who races. Two kinds are novel: one is the clamp clip, in which the foot fastens as in a skate; the other consists of a double strand of wire, twisted and turned to the shape of the foot. A new cyclometer is shown which has two indicators, one for the total number of miles ridden, and another on which single trips may be registered. This instrument is very useful in ascertaining the distance between certain points, and in keeping Gount of the number of miles covered each ay. ———.__ SOME RANDOM REFLECTIONS, Consolation. Young man, go find a benison In twisting words from Tennysont "Tis better to have loved and lost” Than to be married and be bossed. About Pro and Con. “Mamma, what does ‘pro and con’ mean?” wo things opposed to each other, my a.” ‘Oh, that’s where the words ‘progress’ and ‘Congress’ come from, isn’t it “Pap, I see something in this paper about the eccentric engineers. What are they?” “Why, Bobby, they are men who under- stand how to run all sorts of machinery.” “Why, pap, I always thought their busi- ness was to manage people who have wheels in their heads.” ——.__. Appreciated. From the Sumy Hour. “I owe more comfort,” said Mr. Johnson, “to my shoemaker than I do to any other man.” “Why, how ts that,” said Mr. Billings, “when you are always complaining about tight shoes?” “Well, every evening when I take off my shoes and put on my slippers, the comfort I feel is simply intense. e+ Making His Name Familiar. From Brooklyn Life. Short—“There’s another bill from the tailor. I wonder why he keeps sending bills to people who he knows can’t pay.” Mrs. Short—‘Perhaps, my dear, he does it as an advertisement.” Wanted a Soft Thing. From the New York Advertiser, Judge--You're privileged to challenge any member of the jury now being impaneled.” Defendant—“Well, thin, yer honor, Ofll foight that shmall mon in the corner wid one eye.” IN HOTEL CORRIDORS “Alligators are suppose® to be very fona of the colored race as food," exid C. P. Beufort of Trinity, La., at the Normandie “but there is a strange case In Catah ia parish, where I live. .A negro boy about ‘twelve years old ts an alligator charmer. There are not many“of the saurians left in Louisiana, what there are being found al- most altogether in the Boueff, Little, Black and Ouachita rivers, that form a junction at the town of Trinity. On Boueff river es- pecially there are a number of alligators, although not nearly so many as there were & few weeks ago. It ts here that the negro, Jeff Phillips, has his cabin. He feeds the “gators, announcing his coming by playing on a mouth organ. He claims to charm them with his music, but as I have never known them to be affected by music, I dcn’t place much reliance in that theory, But for several years Jeff has gone recu- larly to the river bank and fed the alliga- tors. In hot summer weather he will lay stretched cut on a log, playing his mouth ergan, while around him will be half a dozen alligators, two or three of them large ones, sunning themselves upon the same log, and paying no attention to Jeff. “The alligator tamer is looked upon with superstitious awe by those of his race, and is usually avoided, some of the people claiming that he is ssed of a devil in the form of an alligator.” “There are misfortunes so Intensely fun- ny that one cannot help laughing even though they may be serious,” said J. D. Lynch at the Metropolitan. “I went bes hunting in western North Carolina last sea- sen. The tree had been located, and it was but a short distance from the cabin of the man who found it. We went to the tree, which was a very large one, and hollow to the base. It was so large that the discov- erer thought he knew a better way to get the honey than to cut down the tres. Ke- turning to his cabin, he secured a hatch =t, seme thick strips and large nails. He nail- ed the strips on the inside of the tres, forming a ladder, then climbing up one Sep and nailing another, he succeeded in getting up to where the bees had stored their honey. We were to stand below and gather the comb as he dropped it. One large piece came down, then there was a loud cry of pain, and our friend came tumbling to the bottom, with his head lit- erally covered with bees. We succeeded in rescuing him and killing off the bees by throwing sacks over his head, but when the fight was over the bee hunter presented an appearance that makes me laugh when- ever I think of it.” “The Pennsylvania Dutch, as they are called, are noted for their phlegmatic na- tvres and their honesty,” said P. DD. Goodman of Lancaster, Pa., at the Howarg. “I saw an instance demonstrating both phases a few days ago in Cincinnati. I was walking along Vine street with an ac- quaintance of mine from Lancaster, when he suddenly said: ‘Dat vas mine brudder.’ “I had known the man for twenty years, and never heard of his having a brother. At that moment my friend spoke to a man who was a few feet ahead of us. “Wie gehts, Peter, vas das you? ““Das vas me, und you vas Hans, dond it?” was the placid reply. “The two shook hands, companion, said: “It I never heard of you.” of you,’ replied Peter. “Then 1 was introduced and we went in- to a place to celebrate the event, when Peter said to Hans: ‘I vas owe you five tollar, und das interest. I borrowed ft until ven I should see you some more. Das inter- est was 6 per cent, nine tollars. Himmel, 1 vish I hadt seen you sooner as dis.” He paid the fourteen dollars, Hans ac t asa matter of course, and they pledged their brotherhood in beer.” and Hans, my as thirty years as ‘Same since I heard “Dog stories are usual: chestnuts,” said A. P. dianapolis at the Riggs. ‘It would seem that at some time or another dogs have been known to perform almost every act their masters have. But I never heard the counterpart of a story I know to be true. A fine St. Berrard dog was injured by street car on North Illinois street in In apolls, and his owner took him to a veter- inary surgeon, who @ressed the wounds and gave instructions to bring the ar lowing morning. Before breakfe dog went to the office of the surgeon and waited on the door step until he arrived Every morning the dog appeared before h master arose. and one day bandage around one of the animal's forelegs si and the dog, realizing that something was wicng, went to the office in the middle of the day to have it It took about two weeks for the injuries to heal, at the end of which time the dog ceased his visits, but has always since greeted the veterinarian ectionately whenever he 's him.” “It seems strange that squirrels should be so plentiful as to be a pest in any « tled country,” said E. B. Breed of Spokane, Washington, at the National, “but such is the case in the northeastern part of the state of Washington. They ruin veg tion, and the farmers can find no way to get rid of them. A favorite plan is for the owner of a ranch to have a squirrel shooting match. Sportsmen's clubs from Spokane, Tacoma, Seattle and elsewhore are invited to a squirrel hunt. The ranch- man entertains them roy and prizes are given for the ost squirrels, while the club having the smallest number pays all of the expenses of the trip. Rivalry runs high, and the clubs send iheir very best men to compete for the prizes. It Is not at all uncommon for the leaders to have sev- eral hundred to thelr credit at the erd of a six days’ match, and a thousand a day, where several clubs compete, is. by no means a big record. Yet, notwithstan.d ing this wholesale slaughter, there 8 not seem to be any perceptible dimiaution in their numbers.” T. C. Zachritz of Tucson, Arizona, is at the Cochran. Speaking of his territory, he said: “It is the most wonderful country on earth. It has the only petrified forcst, the only petrifying spring, where anything in. the vegetable line can be turned to stone; is the habitat of the Gila monster, the best cattle country and richest in archaeological and anthropological curios!- ties. The latest has just been unear-hed at Montezuma Wells, consisting of ‘th remains of people of a pigmy race, wholl unlike anything ever yet discover They average but three feet tall, were well form- ed and understood the art of embalming as well as the Egyptians did. A creat many of them are still most excellently presery- ed, and the mummies are better prepared than those of Egypt. There are a preat many relics of the Aztecs in Arizona, but this race evidently occupied the country prior to the time of the Aztecs.” C. R. Rittenhouse of Chicago, formerly a detective, but now a traveling salesman, ‘a at the Raleigh. He delights in reminis- cences of his work as a sleuth, and among his best stories 1. that of a pickpocket ar- rested by Rittenhouse in Chicago and sent to the penitertiary at Joliet, Il. “I never believed much in kleptomank: he said, “until I took up that cese. The fellow was respectable, although not rich, and yet sev- eral cases of pocket picking were proved against him. He was sentenced to ten years in the penitentiary. Soon after he had been searched and dressed in convict garb one of the officials who assisted that work missed a gold watch and a di mond pin. They were found the next ¢ in a sink. The man was assigned to th shoe shop, and the very first day he was there one of the contractors lost a watch which was never found. A few @ late: a visitor missed a diamond scarf p careful search revealed it hidden tn a sho: A day or two later the foreman who repr sented the contractors was out a pocket book. This was found in Hall's posses: and he was put in solitary confinement, the man who took him to the dungeon be- ing robbed of his pocket book on the way. A search of Hall's cell revealed several a:- ticles that had not been missed by the owners. He was punished in every way the fules would allow, but to no avail, Whenever any one passed within reach of his hands, something was sure to be stol- en. Finally a commission adjudged him insane, and he ts now confined in an a: lum. I don’t believe that man was sponsible.” ree the best. Try « 3 cigarettes are Sweet Moment: Sold by all dealers, package.