Evening Star Newspaper, November 30, 1895, Page 22

EVENING STAR, SATURDAY, NOVEMBER 30, 1895-TWENTY-FOUR PAGES. ‘A New York firm has adopted a scheme for advertising their business which appeals to the heart of an autograph collector who detailed the facts to me a short while ago. The firm offers a lathe valued at $1,500 to the technical or mechanical school of any universityreceiving the greatest number of votes for the article in question. Each uni- versity that enters the race, of course, for- wards the cards containing this fact and a request for the full name of the voter to the various éminent men who have it as an alma mater, These cards are in turn sent to the lathe manufacturers, and they will have on hand a most valuable collection of the autographs of althost® every “living American celebrity, statesmen, scholars and wealthy citizens. Our own Columbian Un versity is-a contestant.for the prize, and has sent out cards to its scattered children. * eK KO In former years some Washington women were in the habit of taking a trip over to Baltimore spring and fall to-do their shop- ping, but there is, one wise woman who says she has done her last In this direct‘on, lured by the prospect of unlim‘ted saving: In telling her experience of the compar: tive cheapness and value 6f the articles in the two citfes-she says Baltimore simply “isn’t in it’ with Washington. me years ago,” she said, “there “might have been some cause for the opinion that one could do better in this neighboring city, but dur- ing the past ten years Washington has steadily improved In the matter of shops and merchandise, while Baltimore _hé either stood still or retrograded. Just to mention one article to show the difference in prices, I priced.a wire hat frame over there and was charged 40 cents for the same article that can be purchased here for 25. In fact, I found almost as great a com: parison in nearly every article I wished to buy, and so from now on I shall patron'ze home industry and save money. kk OK KOK During the lovely hazy Ind‘an summer weather that has characterized this autumn a little child gave as sweet and poetic a description of the atmosphere as any poct could. Looking out the window one after- moon she remarked the peculiar condition of the air, and turning toward her mother said: “Mamma, it looks drowsy out of doors today, don't it?” ee ROK The United States has all sorts of crazes at varying intervals, but just now it is wrestling with a brand new one, and that is the Dutch fad. Everything is Dutch, from women’s bonnets to the table linen, and not a household is complete without a collection of Delft china, which has entirely superseded all other sorts in the popular esteem. Indeed, some people think it is all the work of the so-called Dutch bonnet, for that was found to be so universally becom- ing that the promoters of public taste hied them to Dutchland for further inspiration, and now we are in danger of being flooded with the ideas from this sturdy little king- dom. Tourists abroad this summer seemed to find Holland quite the most interesting spot in Europe, and scarcely a trunk passed through the custom house that @‘d not con- tain a portrait of Queen Wilhelmina, the girlish ruler of the land of dyk In ad@ition to the generai interest there dmiration for Duten ‘k's plays and Maa has arisen. a critical writers, and Maeterl ten’s novels are being devoured and as- similatel] by American bookworms to a most surprising extent. Even the gentle art of embroidering has been affected by the fad, and windmills wave their ari where flowers used to bloom, and all Zorts of quaint devices are wrought in silks } tens, who gravely tell you unsuspicious m: wien you marvel at “they are Dutch” their oddity. x ee OK OK A bride and groom passing through Washington last week got even with some of their tormentors, who had played in- numerable wedding pranks upon them, in f@ very clever manner. It happenel that one of the bride’s attendants was a Wash- ington girl, and came as far us this city with the happy pair, accompanied also by a very ardent admirer. The newly wed- ded pair occupied part of their journey by carefully collecting all the rice with which they had been showered just before their departure from home, and when the train stopped at ‘the depot here, just as the un- suspecting young woman was being ten- derly helped to alight by her escort, the returned the rice, and shifted the burde of lately acquired matrimony on the other pair of shoulders. Of course, the Washing- ton girl could not get mad, for she had been one of the chief instigators in carry ing out the Japanese rite. + <8 4 & ‘There are some things the new woman cannot do as well as men; this none but the most hopeful of her sex denies. [ut an apartment house in this city, while not denying to its occupanis the privilese of smoking, has made it obligatory that the wemen smoke elsewhere. This eil grew out of an unforeseen accident that occurred last week. It seems thut one of the guests of the gentler sex was in the habit of tak- ing her post-prandial ecigaretie in the pri- vacy of her apartment, unsuspected by the other residents, until a few nichts ago dropped some of the ashes fr her weed upon the lace draperies at the win E set them afire. Her placid dreams of woman's equality were disturbed by the recessity of doing something, and doing it quickly, so she hauled down the burning for the next room to ater. In the doorw curtain and started throw it into some \v hung portieres, to which the mes con: municated themsely2s, an-l hy the time great hole was burnt in them and the e a bad spread itself to the rug she deciaed she had better call for help, even if she had to make confession before all the other women in the house. Now one of the rules of the establish- ment is: “Ladies will kindly smoke out- side,” and the cause of woman nas had another setback. Ke te * Not to be too hard on the women, I waft to give them a plece of advice I rece from the elevator man at one of tt stores down town. “Just you noti said, “how ladies crowd into the el all trying to get in first, and even then th won't sit down and make room for Inter comers. No, they stand up, and frota the back of the car ‘Let me out at the second floor. if they know are going to get out so soon, why they get in last instead of first, in are the first to get out, weuldn’t have to push and shov do. “Women are funny creatures, he went on. “I'd bet all my s not a woman goes np in this e ing the whole day who does not on comin: in ahd going out try to get a look at her self In the glass, and sometimes they keep any way,’ the other passengers waiting while they put their bonnets straight or pat fr front hair, and, in short, make a fr¢ start with themselves,” xe ee “I'm agin’ all labor-saying machiner said a former chief of division of the Trea: ury Department, talking with some friends on F street a few days ago. “I learned the painting trade in my younger days, and when I was relieved from duty here I drifted to Chicago, getting th while the world’s fair buildings pushed forward to completion. I ma:de for painting the big palaces, figuring that by putting several hundred men on the he ng bi job I could get the work done in the time specified. “But the labor-saving business busted me! Just as I thought I had got everything my own way, along came a fellow with a lequirteun contrivance and captured hai contract. By his arrangement he coul squirt a yard-wide thin sheet of paint am the floor to the ceiling, and one machine eculd do the work of many men. : “That disgusted me and I went further west, landing in a city where the republi- cans had just elected their full city ticket = The democrats had used ‘economy’ as thet motto, while their opponents had promised to expend large amounts in street improve- ments. That caught the laboring element, and the democrats were snowed under. “[ got there just in time to put in a bid with a friend of ming on a fat contract for grading and wideni a number of streets, and things began to look exceedingly“rosy for me, but the labor-saving fiend got in his work again, and quite a number of us were left out in the cold. “This time it was a steam combination plow, shovel, rake and roller on wheels, and each machine, with two attendants, did the werk of about fifty men, but it took the en- tire police force of the city to guard the machines during the night after the first day's work. Then the city compromised by swearing in every unemployed laborer as a special policeman, so the surplus funds were all expended in street improvements, after all” ce ee es You may get a girl to help you with the refreshments tonight,” said a K street lady to her colored servant last Tuesday afternoon. Little Harry, a 7th street clerk, had told her that her daughter would be given a masquerade surprise party that night, and had arranged to come early and admit the young people at the basement door, “Wish you would find out how Minnie is going to dress, so I will know her when she comes,” he said to his sister. His best girl teased him by refusing to tell what char- acter she intended ,to represent at the party. ‘The sister found out that Minnie was going as a colored girl—would Blacken her face with burnt cork and wear black gloves. “Aha!” thought Harry, as he posted him- self in the area Tuesday evening. “I think I'll give her a litde surprise not down in the program.” The young masqueraders commenced gathering promptly at 7, and a few min utes later Harry saw a slim, girlish figuri with ebony face, coming through the gat He pounced upon her as she came down the steps. 2 “Thought you, smarty his arms and ki wouldn't know you, didn’t said Harry, gathering her in irg her, "Don't be in a hurry,” he said, as the girl struggled to get away from him. “They haven't all got here yet,’ and he gave her another smack. Sut just then a couple came through the gate, and he released her. With a “tee-hee,” she darted through the door, anc shortly after Harry came in with the last of the party. Then th all marched up into the parlor, Harry glancing at the mirrer in the hat-rack to see if there | were any telltale signs of burnt cork on his face. “Wonder where Minnie has hidden her- self!’ thought Harry, as he entered the parlor. He saw her brother in a corner, and went over to him. “Where's Minnie?" he whispered. “Oh, I forgot to tell you. Min. has a bad sore throat, and mother thought she better not come out tonight!" * OK * “Taik about mysteries,” said Uncle John, an old colored man, who lives on the Virgin- ia side of the river, “the r.cs’ mysterio st thing in the world happered to me ter. "Member dat blizzard we had The Star man was out in it, and remem- kered it distinctly. “Well, I walked over on the ice that day to get some groceries an’ borrow a two-inch augur. Goin’ back I happened to ‘member I hadn't any meat in the cabin, so I bored a hole in the ice with the augur, an’ dropped in my fishline. I caught a heap of shad, an’ ‘em weighed about ten pounds MiUnele Joh id The kim a severe leok; “ten pot a two-inch augur hole!” “Yes, boss; an’ dar’s jes where de mystery comes in ‘tar man, giving ds, and the hole a ee * F As I was passing along F street, a horse attached to a street car stumbled and fell. A crowd gathered around, and there were many uncomplimentary remarks about the driver’s incapacity for handling horses. I spoke to him about it, and learned some- thing about street cars that I never knew befcre. “You hear them say I must be new at the business,” he said. “I have been driving street car horses for fifteen years, and be- fore that I worked on a farm. A street cur driver is never without the fear, in damp or | cold weather, that a horse will fall. The car is not heavy to pull after it gets started and the principal thing the horses have to do is keep out of its way. When going down grade, the momentum sends the car faste than the horses can go, unless the brak hold well. The slightest misstep brings a horse down. He don’t stumble and thus give but falls as though he had been shot. s ight and momentum be long before the It won't will all be gone, and drivers will xchange the lines for the levers of gladly motors. be prominent as a stump speaker in Kan- sas tells of an experience he had at Top during the rigid enforcement of -the prohi- bition law. He was at the Windsor Hotel with Gov. Click, and both were to deliver speeches that day. A merchant in ghe din- ing room was a if he intended fo go to the meeting, when he broke forth into d tirade of abuse against the politicians f taking the part the saloons, and di nounced the opposition to the prohibition law most bitterly. The man’s store was not far from the hotel, and passed it a wagon load of containing crackers, was being empt One of these fell, and, breaking open, ai: closed the fact that it was full of bottles of liquor. * ad One of the happiest little boys I ever saw is a cripple and will never walk. His lower limbs are paralyzed, and the little fellow is wheeled around.in a chair made for his especial use. When I first saw him I thought how awful it must be for boy not to be able to run a children, and ¥ "t it lovely run ani es," said the it, but I'm happ: I'd get hurt. Litt Then 1 felt rebuked, and the little bo whistling and singing in his chair, playin with whatever is given to him, the minutes ich the days are told, like lighting and gladdening fe's v; neen a lesson to me ever since saw him, here. jump ttle fellow, “I might like where I am, and perhaps Don't you wish you eK wn hotel when a guest to the office and began to object to the hou The the service bad le, After he had gone, a gues to the proprietor: “I should think you Would throw a man like out of the door.” “Oh, 10,” a hotel a valui thing t ally is wrong. If you find som thin 1 hotel that you don't like will y aWay from it, and advise your friends to si away. This hurts the hous very seriou: he kas to while in the hotel and rare’ fails to r ntoit. Th aié any thin; he brings to a landlord's attention that could d and rectified in any other A little later in the day ally that the hotel man was right, as I hap- re i to hear the guest who kad done the I found accident- complaining praising the house to several of his friends. SMALL, SWEET COURTESIES ‘The other morning I ran down 18th street just in time to jump aboard the open car of an avenue cable train, which was nearly filled with office-going passengers. The erly bench with a vacant space in it was near the rear end, and at its end sat a gentleman who supported a pair of crutches at his side. I climbed in by him, and es I did so a rich voice said: “I should have moved up for you, sir, but I alight at the next corner.” The sky was leaden and a dull haze hung over everything, but all seemed suddenly lighted up for me by that exquisite gleam of natural ccurtesy so remarkable in such a@ connection and so good and gracious. Instantly, of course, 1 turned to express my appreciation and am apology for possi- bly disturbing him, when I recognized Fred. Calvert, whose hurt at the Ford's Theater disaster made him a permanent cripple. This little episode has served to make me have many pleasant thoughts and to ru- minate on those “small, sweet courtesies of life’ that make it full sometimes of rare de- light, while the lack of them so often mars the tune of a day. Mr. Calvert's remark reminded me of another incident that also happened in a street car. With all the seats full and the horses steaming and laboring to make schedule time and save the driver a dock in wages, an F street car was rolling ajong, when an old and grizzled negro woman with a kerchief peeping from beneath a faded hat hatled it and climbed on. She bore a heavy bundle in her arms and could free neither hand to grasp a strap. I was standing in front of a splendid-look- ing girl with the mellow light of the south in her hatr and eyes and a superb figure of health clad in fashionable garb. There were half a dozen men seated, but the girl arose. “Here, mammy,” she said in a rich voice, half entreating and half commanding, that bespoke the south even more than her ap- pearance, “you're ilahed; sit down here. “Gor bress yuh, honey,” said the old we man fervently, as with a look of smiling thankfulness she wearily dropped into the seat, “I dun wawk fo’ miles, ur I'd nebber tuk it fum yuh.” Every seated man wes upright in a min- ute, and supple backs bended invitations to the girl, but a fine scorn curled her lip and a shapely, well-gloved hand caught a strap. Two sleepish-lookirg fellows couldn't stand it, and got off, and the girl seated herself like a queen. The day was a good deal brighter for a good many people. Still, that girl's action was the result of decades of refined superiority, and she would deem it singular if any one had ex- pressed surprise at it. * * * ¥ * When we come to think of it, how easy it is to be polite and gracious. Look over the list of your acquaintances and pick cut those whom you most like to meet, and I venture to y every face will wear a smile to your mind's eye and every pair of lips be breaking in words of genial greeting. There is nothing smooths the path of ex- istence so much as those same “small, sweet courtesies,” and it's a pity they are not more frequent and in more general yse. Open cars and carelessness about the com- fort of the old and decrepit, regardless of sex or color, that is so sadly predomi. instances such as I have related are re- freshing. So I chronicle them, and follow the train of thought they lead to. + x Why, oh, why is it that the average man ses to treat his wife with that gallant courtesy that characterized his courting days long before the first baby is bor There is not a married man who will read that question without having an indignant denial of the accusation that the query suggests ready to spring forth, and there's rot one in three score who will not realize that it is a proper interrogation, when he thinks about it. I have in my mind’s eye an excellent example of the genus in this regard. A le over a year ago his Phyllis listened coyly to his lute of love, and never swain more devoted. Were they in company he was first to seek the easiest ef cushioned chairs for her to rest in. At church he held her hymn book, and after service tenderly placed her cape about her shoulders. Not a step was she allowed to take by his side without the support of his ready arm. When he met her on the street tis face was aureoled in delightful bright- ness and his hat deseribed a circle through the air nearby. Her friends envied her such a charming catch, and his friends ap- proved him cordially. The wedding bells Tang out, and every one said it was a splendid match. Thrice this past four weeks I have seen them. If they recognize themselves let it be a little lessor for the future. The first time was in a small company at a private house. She was telling a story of a summer experience they bad. Four times he contra- dicted her a3 to details that were unimpor- tant at best, and once he did so petulantly. The dear little thirg thanked him each time for setting her right, and then proceeded with her narrative. Again I saw them at the theater—the Brownies were holding the stage and the ridiculous German band was convulsing the house. She was laughing immcderately, when I heard him: “Good gracious, pet, anybody would think you rever saw anything funny before.” I no- tieed when the curtain fell that she put on her own cloak and that he was four persons in front of her coming cut the aisle. Three or fovr days later I saw them meet on F street. There was not so much as a grin on his face. He barely touched his hat as he joined her, and his hands went deep in his overcoat pockets as they walked along together. 1 met her dearest friend a few moments afterward, and spoke of meeting them. “Oh,"’ gurgled the charming creature, “they are just the happiest palr of people in the world! She fairly raves over him, and : dotes on her; but he is one of those peculiar fellows who do not like to make @ show of their feelings.” And that's what eve Somehow or other I ca Phyllis, with all her raving, must some- times miss the old-time courtly chivalry and find a something rise in her throat when she thinks about it all. ek KK It is possible that many persons will ex- vbody else says. t help feeling that crvse this after-marriage forgetfulness, to use a mild term, on the ground that the familiarity of compantonship wears off the smooth and pleasant veneering of manners, but if this is so I'm sorry for it. It didn’t do it with our grand- fathers and our great grandfathers, at any raté, and there is no good reason on earth why it shouli do it with our generation. ‘There is plenty of place yet for courtliness in the world despite the crowding and the confusion and the bustle and the rush, and it will be sad indeed if all the manners and graces are to be left at last to shopkeepers and their help as a valuable portion of their stock in trade. And, by the way, there’s another splendid opportunity for improvement in the man- rers of those who have grown careless about ch things. I mean in the shops. Many an excellent lesson may be gained there by the 1ough and the uncouth, if they will merely try to pattern their bearing after that of the people behind the counters. Don’t for heav- en's sake imagine that I mean those silly, rvi creatures who lisp out in affe is only twenty-tive cent This will suit the gentle- man's complexion.” Not in a million years. The class I allude to is numerous in W ington establishments of the better cla and needs no close description. I mean the men and women—especially women—who earn their daily bread in the marts of retail commerce; respectful without forfeiting their seif-respect by being servile; polite, attentive and patient. Don’t you know there i t amount of courtesy in patience sometimes, indeed, I think it the brightest jewel in the cluster. Go into a big store some day and spend half an how studying the customers and the clerks. See the arrogance of sudden wealth and the stupidity of natural ignorance as it haugh- tily gives its commands in imperious wa: Regard the persons who receive the order: Then weigh them both in the scale of cour- tesy and see which side bears down. Mind you, I am merely speaking generally. In a homily of this character one can only pho- tograph the impressions that one receives, and it the cedattivences of bls mental plate is tou delicate er otherwise he must alone be blamed. I love the “small, sweet cour- tesies.’ They are ke fragrant blossoms along the humdrum path of existence and are all the sweeter and of more lasting per- fume when they spring up most unexpect- edly. Their seed is in every breast and their tendrils are curled in every heart, and they need but a gentle touch to burst into bloom. as! In these days of the end seat hogs on | JOE WAS PESTER ED He Didn't Know Héw ‘He Got Out of the Workhouse. He Was in a Fight and Did His Share With the ‘Inevitable #23) Result. Joe was a stableman, who supported a family and thrived on ‘a salary of five dol- lars a week. Besidés being a good man in his profession, he was of immense import- ance in the eyes of the small boys of the neighborhood. In the summer evenings, when work was finished, he would sit under the stunted peach tree an@ play on the ac- cordion and sing. His ghost stories were marvels of fiction, and it was a constant source of wonder to the boys how he could whistie the “Fatal Marriage” in his pecu- liar way. He was black, but they were his friends. The gentleman who employed Joe sold his horses, and the stableman was conse- quently deprived of an occupation. He had received warning of the contemplated change, and had endeavored to secure an- other place, but without success. When Saturday evening came Joe was handed five dollars, and he started toward his home near the dump to give the money to the “ole woman,” as was his custom. But he did not reach home that night. He was inteccepted by a drunken crowd, and in the fight which ersued several policemen ap- peared and arrested half a dozen of the participants. Joe was among the number. I did not see him for several days, and when I chanced to meet him inquired as to the outcome of the arrest. There Was a Fight. “Did yo’ know I was run in? Well, dat’s kerrec’, I suttenly was run in. Well, ‘twas like dis. I got my five dollars on dat Sat’day night, an’ was a-gwine home, an when I got down by Casey’s grocery, dat gang down dere, Red Leary’s gang, dey jumped on me, an’ dey was a fight. I suttenly did fight. Dere ain't no mistake about dat, but dey begun it. It stan’s to reason dat I ain’t a-gwine to begin a fight agin six men at oncet. While we was a- fightin’ de police come down on us and cotch nearly ev'y one, an’ I was one of ‘em. Den dey loaded us into de hurry-up wazon and took us to de station house an’ locked us up. I tol’ ‘em dat it wasn’t right fer me to be locked up, but dey kep’ me all night, an’ in de mornin’ all of us was took down town in de van. F “We was took into de police co’t, an’ one of de policemen tol’ de jedge all about it, an’ said T was a-fightin’. Den de jedge asked me if IL was a-fightin’ an’ I said yes, but dat dey began it. Den de jedge—he' dat one what had de ‘Wil’ Bill’ whiskers— he said it was de fus’ time dat I had been down dere an’ dat he would make it only fiv dollars or fifteen days, He asked me I five doliars, an’ I said I did. He said dat was all right, to pay it an’ I could go. “But T said, ‘No suh, I wants to go to de He seemed to think that was range, but he said if I changed T could pay de five dollars an’ git y time I wanted to. Yo" see what I it was like this. I had been lookin’ for two weeks an’ couldn't git * dey wasn’t any money at home; 0." so T thought f might jus’ as well send dat five dollars to my ole woman, kase !f I got out I might not find any work, an’ she wouldn't have no money. A Touch of) Human Nature. “Well, I went down to de workhouse an’ got into my striped clo’es, an’ dey put de chain on my laig, I stayed dere half a day, an’ den somebody come an’ said ‘Git outen here’ an’ took de chain off. Den dey give me back my street clothes an’ I went away. I was mighty glad to git out, but I was considerable pestered how I done it. “When I went home my wife was dere, an’ had dinner ready for me. I asked her if she got de money all right, an’ she said yes, she did. Den I tol’ her how I was sent to de workhouse an’ how I got out, an’ how I was pestered kase I didn’t know how I got ovt. , “Den she langhed an’ said: ‘Well, yo's de biadk nigger dat I ever see. What I was a-gwine to do wid dat five yo’ s'y dollars? > 'S EIRST CASE. Cc J BERSOD Lots of Glory, but No Fee in a Crimi- al Cause. Congressman Culberson of Texas, known as one of the best lawyers in the House enjoys telling of his first case as a lawyer. The full recital takes about an hour, and !s more cntertaining than a first- plass minstrel show. The outlines of the story are interesting in themselves. Judge Culberson began practice in the little town of Cuthbert, Ala, The judge, the prosecuting attorney and the bailiff in those days ali traveled a_ circuit to- gether. Young Culberson sat in the court room without any clients, wondering when he would get a case. The bailiff touched trim upen the shoulder and taking him to a private room, sai Dave, they've got the old man indicted for playing papers. His trial will come up in two days and I want you to defend him. The judge says that he has never since worked so hard as he did upon that case. Upon the day of trial the state proved every allegation in the indictment and broke down every witness for the defense. The young man said that his only hope lay in the jury and he made the greatest speech of whicn he was capable. In a few minutes the jury brought in a verdict of “not guilty. Every cne congratulated the young law- yer, who celebrated the occasion with his friends in good style. He couldn't afford it, but, then, the fee would cover all of that. No one, however, said anything about poyment, and “Yinally Culberson, blushing like a school girl, suggested to the bailiff hat his fee had not been forthcoming. “Fee? fee? Wi you little heathen, you owe me $10 for giving you a chance to show yourself off. You wasn’t doing any- thing and we wanted you to have a chance. He afterward learned that the indictment was a sham and that the jury was private- ly Instructed to bring ina verdict of ac- Guittal. But the record the young lawyer ought nim cnough clients to keep y after that. DOG PURSE SNATCHER Valuable Canine for a Dishonest Master—How He Works. Pointer dogs can always be trained to steal. Many of them are natural thieves without training, and any of the species can be taught. There is a dog of this kind in Northwest Washington. He will pick up anything he can find around a yard or outside of a store, but his specialty is ladies’ pocket books and hand bags. When he sees one of these he grabs it and runs. always succeeding, in getting out of sight jefore he can be captured or followed. No owner has ever been seen, hence no com- plaints have been made at police head- quarters, but there is but little doubt, if it were possible to fdllow' the antmal, that it would be found that hé has been carefully trained as a purse snatcher, and that he takes his booty hgme to his master. He seems to be aware that he is doing wrong, jumping fences and dodging around houses when running away... 7 Reason fn All Things. From Harper's Bazak. ' “T want to know why, Mrs. McCorkle, you give me hash for breakfast this morning, when you know that yesterday at breakfast I did not touch it.” “That's just why. When you hav that, I shall provide something else. 2 eaten ALCOHOLISM AND INSANITY. Important Statistics Showing Their Relation in France and America. In the course of a report recently submit- ted to the State Department by Mr. C. W. Chancellcr, United States consul at Havre, France, he gives some important statistics in reference to the relation of alcoholism and insanity. He says: “In Frarce it has been found that insanity has increased pari passu with the increase of drunkenness. It is computed that, in 1884, the number of insane persons in France had increased to 133 per 100,000 Inhabitants; in 1885 the number had increased to 136, and it is fair to assume that the increase has pro- gressed with an equal step since then, so that the number of insane in France at this time may be reckoned at 166 per 100,000 of Population, the increase being, it is sald, in a direct ratio to the increased production and consumption of alcoholic drinks. “Comparing statistics, we are led to infer, if like causes produce like effects, that alco- holism is on the increase in other countries besides France. In 1883 Italy contained sixty-seven and Germany eighty-two insane rersons, respectively, for every 100,000 of Pcpulation—a noticeable increase over pre- vious years. The United States in 1850, with a@ population of 23,000,000 inhabitants, had 15,610 insane; in 1860, with 31,000,000 inhabit- ants, there were 24,042 insane; in 1870, with 28,500,000 inhabitants, there were 37,432 in- sane; in 1880, with a population of 50,000,000, there were 91,997 insane. Thus it will be seen that while the population of the United States from 1850 to 1880 had only a little more than doubled, the number of insane had sextupled, and in the following ten years—from 1880 to 1890—for an increase of thirty per cent of inhabitants there has been an augmentation of 155 per cent of insane. Insanity in the United States. “But it Is illogica! to attribute this alarm- ing increase of insanity imthe United States solely to the increased consumption of al- coholic drinks. There are in the United States contributing causes which do not operate to the same extent in other coun- tries, and one which has no existence in any other country. We have, in common with other countries, morphinism, cocainism, chloralism, chloroformism, the ever-grow- ing conflicts between labor and capital, and the excessive thirst for wealth which exists in the United States, and which tends to en- feeble the mind and dethrone the reason. The effe-ts of our great war have also added materially to the insanity percentage. The theory of the French moralists that alco- holic liquors are alone responsible for the in- crease of insanity in France cannot, there- fore, properly be wholly applied to the Unit- ed States, where there are other potential conditions at work to produce similar re- sults. “Undoubtedly it would be a great desidera- tum to effect a modification of the use of al- coholic drinks in the United States, and to substitute for them cheap wines, as it is proposed shall be done in France, both as to brandy and absinth; but the question is, how can it be accomplished?” nd A MODERN Job. Stood Every Misfortune Except the Loss of His Fiddle. -Jchn Stratton has just returned from Wise county, Va., wrere he went to survey some coal lands. “While down there I saw a modern Job,” he said to a Star writer. “I was about twenty miles from Glade- ville, the county seat,when a storm threat- ened. Not wanting to be out in the moun- tains during a storm, I hastened to a log cabin. Under a tree in front sat a ragged uncouth-looking man playing a fiddle. In the tree was a half-grown boy. “ ‘Come right in, mister,’ was his answer to my request for shelter. ‘I don't reckon itll rain much, no how. Kin’ o’ quit rainin’ hyar. Didn’ rain all summer, an’ all the craps I got war one leetle bunch o’ 'baccer.’ bg etty hard luck,’ I seid. ‘Yaas; middlin’. But I didn’ keer so much as when the ole 'ooman tried ter git water outen the well. It war mos’ dry, an’ it kin’ 0’ tock a knuck ter git it. So she leaned over too fur an’ fell in. She's thar yit. I hain’t got no way to git her out, an’ he didn’ never know what hurt her, I reckon I'll jest fill up the well an’ put a board up ter mark her grave.’ ““Well, you seem to haye had a great deal of trcuble,’ I remarked. “*Yaas; it sartain looks like a heap. But the wust was when my mewl, the only one I hed, got stuck in the quicksan’ down yon- der, ’ we hed to shoot ‘im. I war broke up over that, but I've still got my boy up thar in the tree an’ my fiddle.” ~ “At that moment there was a clap of thunder. The old man laid his fiddle ten- derly upon the chair he had occupied and started for the house, carrying the chair and its precious burden. The boy in try- ing to get down from the tree slipped and fell, striking the fidéle and splitting it into several pieces. The old man lifted up the fragments, and, with tears in his eyes, said: ‘I reckon I'm ruint now.’ ——_—— —_ ASSUMED NAME. How a Respectable Citizen Put Him- self Under the Ban. A respectable citizen of a small West Virginia town is under suspicion and his domestic relations are badly strained. It all comes from a visit he made to Washing- ton a few days ago. He had read about conifdence men and was determined that he should not fall into their clutches. Hence, when he got off the train at the Baltimore and Ohio station the countryman was not greatly surprised when a man accosted him with “Good morning, Mr. Smith.”” “My name hain't Smith. It’s Perkins.” “Then the old man chuckled to himself. “Now, there'll be another fellow along and call me Perkins. They won't find out my name is Hadley.” At the Capitol another man _ accosted him. ‘Good morning, Mr. Hadley." The countryman was amazed, but said, “Mw name hain’t Hadley: it's Perkins. Then to himself he murmured, ‘Wonder how them fellers found out my true name, but I won't have no truck with ‘em.” But the individual at the Capitol was not a confidence man, but a former neigh- bor whom Hadley failel to recognize, and he went back to the little West Virginia town and told that the respected citizen was skylarking around Washington under an assumed name. When he returned he was informed by his wife that the story of bis misdeeds had preceded him and that she wanted to know who the woman was he came to Washington to see. His busi- ness partner suggested that when ke was ashamed of his name and wanted to sail under a non de plume he had better go farther away from home, and so far Mr. Hadley has failed to find any one who be- lieves his story about the affair, although it Is strictly true. ———— TALKED HIS THOUGHTS. ~ Amusing Episede at a Reception Brought About by a Habit. Two department clerks are room mates. Jckn is noted for his carelessness in dress, The chief characteristic of Dave is a habit when preoccupied of talking to himself in audible tones of what he is thinking about. They received invitations to a reception last week and Dave borrowed a dress suit for John that he might appear in proper raiment. When they went to the refresh- ment room Dave saw that his friend was paying much more attention to the young lady he was escorting than to his clothes and became worried. The guests were therefore greatly surprised and amused to hear him say “There it goes Now the next spoonful will go right on his lap. I ought to have had more sense than to borrow that suit of clothes for John. He Isn't paying any attention to anything but that girl. Watch him now—just the price of one suit of clothes out of my pocket. If I ever get him back to the room again I'll keep him there.” John could stand no more, and, making hurried excuses, left the house. —_— —— The Irish of It. From Pearson's Weekly. Bridget (applying for a situation)—“‘Oh, yis, mum. Oi lived in my last place t’ree weeks, mum.” Mrs. Van Nobbs—‘‘And why did you leave?” Bridget—“Oi couldn't get along with her, she was so old and craaxy,” Mrs. Van Nobbs—“But I may be old and cranky, too. Bridget. 'ranky ye may be, mum, for faces are sometimes deceiving; but owld, niver!"" And Bridget got the place. Cheapest and best—Dr. Bull's Cough Syrup. A NEW LAMP. A Consular Report From Berlin De- scribes a Valuable Invention. The State Department has received from Consul General De Kay, at Berlin, an inter- esting report of a new invention which is making a stir in the press of Berlin, ard which as been personally examined by the emperor. It consists of a burner like that of the incandescent lamp before reported, in so far as the cotton “hood,” or “‘stockin: im- pregnated with chemicals is concerned, which gives the light its color and steadi- ness. The former lamp, however, is used for ordinary illuminating gas, and the burn- er is adjusted to the ordinary gas jet. In the new invention, the gas consists of the fumes from dealcoholized spirit, an article which is very cheap In Germany. The recent sud- deh rise in the price of petroleum has given this invention peculiar prominence in the newspapers, and the emperor is said to have remarked on the possibilities it offers of opening a new and large field for the con- sumption of potato spirit, which, in a literal sense, is just now a drug on the market. In order to induce the fumes to rise from the spirit into the incandescent “hood,” a hollow metal rod with two elbows like an inverted U is arrarged over the bowl of the lamp so that the two arms descend to the fluid; a wick is passed through this arm, and underneath the arm is placed a simple straight tube with wick, which also de- scends to the spirit. As soon as this wick is ignited, the long arm begins to yet warm above it and the fumes of the spirit begin to assemble in the arm and pass up through a small hole on the upper side into the hood, where it can be ignited. To quench the light, it is only necessary to blow 9ut the little wick below the arm, whereupon the latter gets cold, gas ceases to form, and the incan- descent hood above ceases to operate. “At present, the cost of this lamp is teo great to warrant a wide use of it,” says Mr. De Kay. “A complete lamp costs about $3 and the apparatus to be adjusted to a pe- troleum lamp costs about $3. But these prices are sure to fall rapidly if the public takes to the invention. Another drawhack is the danger of explosions. Although the makers of the lamp claim that there is none, it is not clear how explosions can be svoided in cases where the user lacks experienze or intelligence. “The fluid used is what is called denaturi- ert, or chemically changed spirit, which vol- atilizes at a low temperature and does not have to pay the high tax with which crdi- nary spirit is burdened. In 1885 Germany exported spirit to the amount of 89,000 tons, valued at 28,000,000 marks. Since ‘then the export has fallen, year after year, till in 1890 it was 38,000 tons, valued at 14,000,000 marxs, and in 1893 only 16,000 tons, valued at 4,000,000 marks. On the other side cf the question, petroleum has been imported with a constant increase. In 1885 there were 482,000 tens, valued at 69,000,000 marks; in 1800 there were 664,000 tons, valued at 73,- 000,000 marks, and in 1893 there were 765,000 tons, valued, to be sure, at a lower price, namely, 47,000,000 marks. In the last ten years the increase of imports of petroleum is figured at over 160 per cent, while the dée- erease of exports of spirits is calculated to amount to 21 per cent.” . Se WHAT BECOMES OF OLD WHEELS. Once True and Stanch Friends Now Gone to Pieces Have you ever wondered what has be- come of the thousands of old solid tire wheels that were in such universal use be- fore pneumatics revolutionized things? A Star reporter put the question to a dealer the other day. “A few were converted into pneumatics and cushions and are still on the streets,” he said, “and some were taken by the dealers as part payment on new ma- chines, and are still stowed iway in their shops, there being no sale for solid tires. The second-hand dealers and repairers bought a great many of them up, dissected them, so to speak, and are now utilizing the parts in repair work. The bails, hubs, spokes, cones, axles, bolts and nuts are all useful, and at the last the old frames and rims can be broken up and sold as scrap iron. Some have gone to the country, and Josh Hayseed may be seen complacently pedaling down to the mill for a bag of corn. Machinists use them for making models, occasionally a push-cart will be se2n mount- ed on two rusty old wheels, and even the boys on the street take the small wheels for the making of express wagons. And the balance, I suppose, you'll find stowed away in the cellars and woodsheds of their pos- sessors. Once true and stanch friends, they are now of no use in the world. Aban- doned to cobwebs and ashes, with no com- pany but rats and mice, they dream away their few remaining days. Once asain they stand in full suit of glittering nickel, ad- mired, caressed and praised by all behold- ers; again they are on the road, bearing their masters in safety down long ro: through sand and mud. Once again they see the smooth, hard track, respond to the efforts of the riders as they threw every ounce of effort into the last spriat, cud hear the shouts of the excited crowds as they whiz across the tape. Abandoned and alone, eating out their hearts with rust, they grad- ually drop to pieces, too proud of their \an- ished prestige to give one thought of envy to the modern pneumatic.” a SUCCESSFUL AUTHORSHIP. Valuable Information From One Who Makes $10,000 2 Year. There is a struggling young author in Washkingten who had the misfortune to have a book published, and the additional misfortune of never being able to sell the second one to any publisher. A friend of his told him that what he needed was advice from those who made money out of their work, and a friend of his in New York received salaries amount- ing to $10,000'a year from his writings. The two were brought together at the house of a mutual friend, and the follow- ing conversation was overhear “I am very glad to meet you,” said the young man. “Advice from so successful an author would be invaluable to me. “I will be glad to help you with any sug- gesticrs I can make,” was the gracious repl. “What class of books do you find pay the best?” “Books, books?’ was the response, in a tone of great disgust. “Who told you I wrote books? Any man can write books. You don’t suppose I cculd make $10,000 a year that way, do you? I write advert ments, sir, for some of the largest houses in the country. Do I iooK like a scribbier of books, sir?” and the indignant author left the roc m. oe MONKEY WAS DEAD. An Organ Grinder That Did Very Profitable Mourning. On 7th street yesterday a pathetic scene might have been witnessed. An organ grinder held g dead monkey in his arms and sobbed over the inanimate body as if tis heart would break. The man and the mcnkey had been constant companions ever since they came from Italy, five years ago, und the animal was the man’s only friend. A sympathizing crowd took up a collection to partly assuage the organ grinder’s grief and buy him another mon- key. A few. hours later he appeared on Pennsylvania avenue near 20th street northwest and another collection was taken up. His grief seemed so real and his love for the monkey so genuine that few de- clined to add to the collections. Last night the organ grinder, with the monkey, took a train for Baltimore, and then for the first time it was discovered that the monkey had been dead for some time. In fact, it had been stuffed. eee ees A BICYCLE AND A DOG, A Boy Rides the Wheel and the Ani- mal Rides the Boy. Going up the avenue on a cable car last right I heard two or three exclamations of wonder and surprise on the rear platform and went out to see what it was all about. “You can train ‘em to do anything, can't you, sonny?” inquired the conductor of a boy who was riding a bicycle at the side of the track. “Yes, indeedy, “See, I can't even shake him off.” he violently shook his body. I looked closer and saw that a black dog was clinging to the boy’s back, with his bind paws holding precariously en to about an inch of the projecting rear of the bicycle seat, while his fore legs were over his young master’s shoulders. The car stopped to let a passenger off at 19th street and the con- ductor, when the youngster and his pet went skimming off in the darkness, told me the lad was a telegraph or District messenger, and “could do anything with a dawg but make him tawk.” was the cheery response. Here TRAGEDY OF A CAVE. Did Not Fear the Law, but Ran Away From the Rope. “It happened this way,” said a western man at one of the uptown hotels to a Star writer, who had asked him for particulars of a story he had casvally referred to. “Old man Jepps was about the meanest man who had ever lived on the banks of the Colorado, but as far as his neighbors knew he had kept within the bounds of the law. He whipped his wife, abrsed and beat his childrer, was cruel to his horses, cattle and dogs, and Was so clese with his money that everybody mistrusted that he would steal If he had half a~chanee. He had three children, two girls and a boy, the boy about eighteen years old and quite a de- cent sort oi a lad, considering his raising. This boy seemed to be a special object of meee ae bis reer and. many a time he e him out into the nij doors against him. sie ca ie “The boy wanted to run away, but his nother and sisters begged him to stay, and on their account he did so. About a’ milo from the Jepps house was a big ledge and cliff, and in this were several caves, some of them of unknown extent, and to these the boy often went at night and slept when the old_man would not let him stay at home. One night the old man was particu- larly ugly, and turned all of his wrath loose on the boy and drove him owt. The next morning he did not appear at break- fast, and after the meal the old man, still full of rage, went tg look for him. - “Just what happened nobody knows, but at noon the old man came home to dinner and reported that he could not find boy, and it was a good thing for him that he couldn't. The mother and sisters made no reply, but their thought affirmed what the old man said, for they knew what he would do to the boy when the opportunity offered. Next day ond the next the boy did not ap- pear, and the old men reported that it was I'kely he had run off for good; but the wo- men had their do.bts. Things went on this way for a month, and still no boy. “Then the women could stand it no longer and reported to the neighbors, keeping their actions concealed from the old man. They told about the cave and the old man going to lovk for young Jepps, and the peo- ple rose in a bedy and sent out searching parties for the young fellow. Finally they fourd ameng the caves cne with its mouth walled up and blocked full of heavy stones and dabbed over with mud from the stream below. Very rapidly the willing searchers tore away the obstruction, and with lights they entered the cave. A few ragged pieces of quilts and blankets were found; there was an old coffee pot, a skillet and ashes, and all about the inside of the wall were evidences of a struggle to remove the stones. “Some of them were rolled aside, but the heavier ones and the mud stuffed in the cracks and grown hard was untéuched. But there wus no sign of the missing boy. The cave was searched as far as possible, but many passages could not be reached, and the searchers gave it up at last and came out empty handed. In the meantime the father hai been arrested and was in jail, but there was no evidence on which to hold him, as he denied all knowledge of the young mar. after he left the house on the last night. Everybody-was sure he had walled the boy up in the cave and left hin: there to starve. but the body could not be found and nobcdy could swear he was dead, and there the law and the people stood powerless to do anything except let the father go. . “And that's what was done, and the old man went to his home a free man. It was about dark when he got there, and @t mii- night, when the lynching party arrived, to do what the law couldn't, Jepps had dis- appeared, and he never came back. He left considerable property, which Mrs. Jepps and the daughters held, and for several years now they have been making persist- ent searcn of the cave for the body or skel- eton of the young man, but at last ac- ccunts it had not been found, and I sup- pose never will be, for in all probability the poor boy went crazy and dashed himself into some deep pit in the darkness, and SS trumpet only will bring hin orth.” HE GOT EVEN. Congressman Culberson Plays a Prace tical Joke Upon Tom Williams. The story of the Alabama law suit, in- volving a jack, in which Congressman Tom Williams of Alahama and Judge Cul- Lerson of Texas appeared upon opposite sides, and ihe use the fermer madc of it in @ campaign has been published, but the sequel never was. Congressman Wiliam# and Robert G. Ingersoll resemble each other very closel the only point of very noticeable dissimi- larity being a slight sear upon Col. Inger- soll’s face. When Congressman Williams told the law suit. story, Judge Culberson concluded to get even. Procuring two dozen lithographs of Ingersoll. used by tim in bis lecture tours, the judge cut off the name and signed them in imiiation of Williams’ writing, “Very Truly Yours. Tom L. Williams.” Thes* he sent to men in different parts of the Alabama district, being careful to leave out the most influen- tial friends of Williams. In a short time the scheme began to work. Williams re- ceived leiters asking for one of his big pictures. These he answered graciously, saying that he had none. Jhen would come back replies in the most indignant style, telling him that they had seen them, and if he wanted to lie about it he could do without their support. These letters Mr. Williams referred to his friend, Judge Culberson, who advised him to go home and straighten it out. This the pcrplexed member did, obtaining a ten days’ leave of absence. When he returned he said to the judge: “I found them there, framed and hung up. They looked like me, and there was my signature. Finally, I noticed the scar on the face, and that saved me. I got it fixed up, but I had to go to every county in the district.” Finally, it leaked out who had played the joke, and a compact was made that Williams should never again mention the law suit and Judge Culberson should play no m jokes. Resa HARD TO EXPLAIN. A Horse That Gave His Master's Habits Away. A Washington professional man has an intelligent horse. The gentleman named is in the habit of going on occasional sprees, and when he does, the horse knows at once that his driver does not want ‘o go home and takes him to a country house about seven miles from the city. The professional man, when about to spend an evening among the beys, sends word to his wife that he has been called out of town and in this way has beef able to keep the fact that he drinks a secret from every one except the companions with whom he goes.on sprees. A few evenings ago the wife and a lady visitor started for a drive. The Lorse no- ticed that something was wrong with the way the lines were grasped and started for the country place, supposing that the owner was intoxicated again. No amount of pull- ing or whipping could be made to change his course, and about dark he halted in front of the resort. “Here, Tom,” called the proprietor, ’s drunk again. Come help carry him in, Ard Dan, put up the Now the lady ts visiting her mother in Vir- ginia and it will take a strong pledge upon the husband's part to induce her to return, eer Fras A Conundrum, , sonny, where's yer money ?* “Oh, I—I'll give it up!”