Evening Star Newspaper, January 27, 1894, Page 17

CAPITOL KITCHENS A Visit to the Basement of the Sen- ate. WHAT OUR SENATORS EAT Ovens Which Will Roast Oxen and Gridirons Big Enough for Sheep. STATESMEN AT THE TABLE ‘Written for The Evening Star. ONGRESS WANTS new kitchens. A committee of the House has been ap- pointed to investigate the matter, and the members are by no means satisfied with the dark rooms and old-fashioned cooking utensils with which the basement of that part of the Capitol fs furnished. The res- taurants of Congress do as big a business as any high-toned eat- ing houses in the United States. Nearly a thousand people are fed daily at the tables of the House restaurant, and fully five hundred have their stomachs tickled by the appetizing viands dished up in the restau- rant of the Senate. The Senate of the United States recently put in new kitchens, and there is no club house fn the world that has a@ better culinary apparatus. Our greatest statesmen are more particular as to their bills of fare than they are as to the bills before Congress. They want all the latest frills in the fashion of their dishes, and they use everything that modern invention can supply to help them in their cooking. I have spent some time this week in sampling the good things of the restaurants and have made a study of the Senate kitchen. The latter cannot but be interesting to the wo- men of the United States. They are away down under the ground. You go through winding stairways into the subbasement of the Capitol. You take a Sabbath day's jour- ney through gloomy corridors, and you final- ly find yourself in a suite of bright rooms lighted entirely from the top, and floored, walled and ceiled with the cleanest of white tiles. These rooms are vaulted. They are the kitchens, storerooms and bakeries of the Senate and they form one of the ‘busiest parts of the Capitol building. It takes about thirty employes to run them. You see white- aproned, white-capped men everywhere, and there are cooks and dish washers, oyster shuckers and bakers, making up a corps large enough to run a big summer hotel. The main room of the kitchen proper is 15 feet wide by 100 feet long. It contains two rang®s, each big enough to roast an ox, and it has patent steamers and baking ma- chines here and. there about it. In one cor- ner is the biggest soup pot in Washington. It will hold about two bushels of liquid and ft ts the size of the largest apple butter ket- tle. It is made of the brightest of red cop- per and it is used for keeping the stock for the making of the soup. Nickel-plated steam pipes run through it and the liquid is always hot. A little further over there is a copper pot of about half this size, heated in the same way, in which the cranberry sauce and apple sauce which is eaten by these Senators is cooked, and near this is a patent turkey roaster. It would make your mouth water to know just how good the turkers cooked by this process are. They are roast- ed by steam, and the roaster is a double iron box about as big as the average dry goods box, within the walls of which steam is conducted by nickel-plated pipes, thor- oughly roasting the mallard ducks and the twenty-pound turkeys which are laid away within it. Another feature of this kitchen is the grill. It is a gridiron so large that you ceuld lay the largest sheep upon it and broil it. This rests over a bed of red-hot reoal, and the fire is such that the steak or chop can be well done in tive minutes. This grill is kept going about six hours a day, and the juicy meat which from it has made most of the gray which you will find im the alleged brains of the Congressional Record. ‘The chief cook presides over the ranges. He gets $100 a month as wages, and his cook- ing stoves are large enough for a Long Eranch hotel. The main range is six feet wide and twelve feet long. and a curious thing about it to me is the holes in the top and the stove lids. These last are made of rings of metal, one inside of the other, that you can make the opening over as big around as a sau large as a dishpan. ¢ awning, above which is a ventilator, so that the smell of the cook- ing is drawn off into the open air, and in this vast kitchen where there are dozens of turkeys and ali sorts of vegetables over fire there is not as much smell as you the fi will find in the rooms of a young married couple who are doing light housekeeping. Right under the range there are hot cav- erns for re ting, and one range is devoted entirely to the roasting of turkey and game. The bakery of the establishment is @ great iron safe, as large as the vault of n ordinary bank. This is presided over 7 and every roll and loaf eaten n taurant is baked in this In the center of the room there are bles of zine kept hot by steam, and upon these lie great dishes of roasts ‘and stews ready to be cut up or dished out and sent to the eating rooms. Another room, almost as large as this kitchen, is devoted to keep- ing things hot, ana there are more steam tables in this filled with hot tin boxes, in Which are all sorts of viands. A Mammoth Store Room. I took a look at the refrigerators. One was filled with turkeys and game. ‘The halves of beeves and sheep. hung upon the walls, and the room was so large that I went inside of it and found it lighted with electricity and as cold 2s an ice house. In another room I was shown where the 2) of the establi nt are kept. This vw square, and it was ized gro- eanned Bags of . Barrels of There were by the crate In case of a could be fel for a month of this store house, and man an possibiy or< f thi there is the meat i cery si goods and eat: Potatoes . té Part 3. Che Fy TITY Star. Pages 17=20. WASHINGTON, D. C., SATURDAY, JANUARY 27, 1894-TWENTY PAGES. @F- To ADVERTISERS. | ‘Advertisers are urgently re “‘Quested to hand in advertisements ‘the day prior to publication, in order that insertion may be as- sured. Want advertisements will be received up to noon of the day ‘©f publication, precedence being given to those first received. cut up, and another vault is devoted to oyster shucking and fresh oysters, and here the terrapins are kept. One great copper box in the kitchen is devoted to the steaming of oysters, and there are special dishes for the getting up of ter- rapin stews. The dishes used would stock a big queensware store, and it keeps one or two men continually washing at the dishes. The plates which are used for sending up food are kept warm in a patent dish warmer, which is heaied by steam, and the ceilings of these rooms are filled with great hooks like those of a smoke house, on which the brightest of copper and tin pans and kettles are hung. A dumb waiter runs from the kitchen to the restaurants of the Senate, and about the only cold things served to the statesmen are the ice water and champagne. Senators Peffer and Wolcott. The dining rooms of these Senators are worth looking at. Their walls and ceilings are frescced. They sit around the finest of damask cloths on chairs of oak, cushioned with green leather. Their dishes are china and their forks are of silver. The most of them prefer steel knives, and silver is only used for the cutting of fruit. The common dining room is apart from that used by the Senators, and there is a pie and oyster counter presided over by waiters. At these the statesmen now and then take a snack, but the most of them are good livers, and they take a full meal at noon every day of the year. It is funny to watch them eat and to see “Upon what meat these our Caesars feed that they m: Srow so great.” Take Don Cameron. He looks like a dyspeptic, and as he sits in the Senate he chews his red mus- tache as if he were hungry. He is as lean as a rail, and you would never suppose that he was one of the biggest eaters of the Capitol. He likes rich food, and he washes his lunch down every day with a pint of champagne. One of his favorite dishes i calves liver and bacon, and he smacks lips three times a week over a chafing dish stew. Senator Stewart of Nevada is an other man who is fond of a chafing dish stew, and there is a baker's dozen of Sen- ators who think that oysters served in this way form a dish for the gods. Senator Stewart cooks his oysters himself. He calls for a dozen of the finest selects and these are brought to him at the table and a chaf- ing dish is set before him. There is no water used. The oysters are stewed in their own liquor in a large glass of the best sher- ry wine, and in addition he puts in a big lump of butter and the yolks of two eggs, and then salts and peppers to taste. It is one of the richest dishes known to public men and is very productive of gout. Sen- ator Stewart drinks no wine with his meals, but he how and then has a bottle of beer. He is not very particular about his sur- roundings, but he likes to do his own cook- ing. Stewart's Chafling Dish. Senator Hawley knows what is good, but he usually takes a light lunch. His favorite dish is chicken soup, and after this he has a piece of apple pie and a glass of milk. If he has a friend with him he spreads himself out over the whole bill of fare, but when alone his lunch is a light one. Senator Sherman is another pie eater. His favorites are apple and custard, and he always takes a glass of milk with his lunch. Senator Frye lunches on apple pie and a cup of tea. Peffer of Kansas contines himself to a bowl of bread and milk or an oyster stew. Peffer never pays more than cents for a meal, and he doesn’t waste his change on waiters. Joe Blackburn and Arthur P. Gorman are both fond of good living. Blackburn likes a toddy made of old Pepper whisky to take with his meals, and Gorman eats his meats cold. He is fond of cold ham and turkey, and one of his side dishes is usually hashed brown potatoes served up with a poached egg upon them. Senator Hoar of Massachusetts has the reputation of being a light feeder. He is, however, one of the richest gourmands of the Senate, and he is fond of filling his round stomach with a chaiing dish stew, and he dotes on sweetbreads served up in butter. There is nothing too good for Senator Wolcott. He wants his food highly seasoned and he is very fond of pheasants and other game. He iikes a nice porter- house steak served so rare that the blood runs down its sides. He eats a big meal every noon and the day is cold indeed when you find any wrinkles in his stomach. All of these western men live well. Hans- brough and Dubois want the best that the cooks can provide. Senator Perkins of Cal- ifornia is a great feeder, and his colleacue, Senator White, picks out half a dozen dish- es and eats them all. These men seldom dine alone and the average statesman likes company at his meals. Henry Cabot Lodge usually brings a party in with him, and Tom Reed, Julius Caesar Burrows and Dol- iver of Iowa come to the Senate and eat their lunches together. Reed usually takes a course dinner at noon. He begins with blue points and likes to wash his meals down with champagne. Senator Vest and the Oyster. , Senator Cush Davis is one of the big fish eaters of the Capitol. He likes anything that comes from the water, and he feeds his brain on black bass five times a week. He is fond of Mallard duck, and he washes his lunches down with a pot of hot coffee. He drinks a great deal of hot milk and takes a bow! of milk as a nightcap before going to sleep. The New YSrk Senators usually 2ome to lunch together, and they are ooth good feeders, though Hill merely nibbles at the dishes he orders, while Mur- phy eats all of the best and lots of it. Mitchell of Oregon makes his lunch off an oyster stew and a glass of sherry. Platt | of Connecticut is fond of a bowl of custard or a chafing dish stew, and Senator Petti- grew likes lamb chops and cold rou: beef. Power of Montana is a dyspeptic. He has no stomach to speak of, and he looks at his victuals with such a vinegar | aspect that his milk has to be boiled be- | fore it is bi t to him for fear it will| r lunch is a bowl of boiled of brown bread well toas He breaks the toast into the milk and | dishes it up with a spo Senator Squire of Washington is a good liver. He wants everything that is nice he wants it served hot. He is fond 14 eat these set before h with a small cup of cotf 1p his junch- | and a pony of brandy. He is a rich man and always has friends with him. He is very particular to have his account just right to the cent, and he would, I doubt not, fight with the waiter for the overcharge of a penny, and after he had gotten the matter settled his way would like as not give the negro a fee of a dollar. He is a queer man as regards money matters, and he believes in running everything, from his politics to his pan- cakes, on a business basis. Another rich man is Senator Stockbridge of Michigan. He wants the best he can get, but he never drinks anything but water or milk. Tur- pie of Indiana lunches on oysters and wants fruit every day. Vance of North Carolina is satisfied with a sandwich, and Dan Voor- hees eats enough country sausage and cakes to give any other statesman the gout. Wilson of Iowa, the great prohibitionist, usually dines off a glass of milk and a piece of apple pie, and Roger Q. Mills can fill up his bread basket with chicken salad and feel like a king. One of the biggest feeders we have had in the Senate for years was Senator Stanford. He ate the richest of food and he would take dishes like calf’s liver and bacon and chafing dish stews day after day for a week in succession. He generally drank brandy and soda or ginger ale with his meals, and he kept his system pretty well loaded with fats. He gave lunches sometimes to his brother Senators, and he seldom ate by him- self. Don Cameron often gives his friends dinners at the Capitol, and one of the great lunchers of the past was George H. Pendle- ton. He used to feed statesmen by the dozens, and he had stand-up lunches in his committee rooms while he was in the Senate. The biggest lunch of recent times was given by Senator McPherson. This Was about three years ago, and seventy-five gentlemen and ladies sat down at the table. Senator Gorman gave a lunch to Nat Good- win in the Capitol this winter, and the menu The New York Senators. was something like this: First, there were blue points on the half shell. Then quail, stewed terrapin and chicken salad in the order given. Champagne was brought in with the terrapin, and the dessert was Char- lotte russe and coffee. An ordinary citizen would call this a course dinner, but with Gorman it was only a lunch. I have always looked upon southern men as big eaters, but Senators from the south eat the least. George of Mississippi seldom takes more than broiled oysters and a glass of milk. Walthall is satisfied with milk and pie, and Vest, fat as he is, often lunches on the raw bivalves. He stands up, and he eats his saddle rock oysters standing. Old Joe Brown used to say that there was noth- ing so good on earth as puddle ducks and sweet potatoes, and Isham G. Harris seldom gets more than a glass of milk at the Cap- itol. Faulkner likes «aw oysters. Higgins of Delaware fattens up on baked apples, and Chandler of New Hampshire, -lean as he is, often takes a chafing dish stew. Ran- som seldom eats more than a cracker and a glass of milk. Cockrell is satisfied with ary bread, and Senators Aldrich of Rhode Island and Morrill of Vermont are both milk drinkers. Nearly all of these Senators are oyster lovers, most of them are fond of terrapin, and on the whole they are fairly good livers. The Luscious Dinmond Back. Speaking of terrapin, these are more in demand every year here at Washington. No big dinner is now complete without them, and I am told that the terrapin crop now amounts to the enormous aggregate of $2,000,000 every year. They sell for all sorts of fancy prices, and $30 a dozen is a low average. I venture to say that there will be in the neighborhood of a million terrapin eaten this year, and there are now a number of terrapin farms along the Chesapeake bay which are said t® pay, while there is one on the Patuxent river which contains thousands of terrapin, and in which they are hatched, raised and fed for the market. Another farm is run by New York parties, and the probability is that these farms will be increased in num- ber and size with the present demand. The Chesapeake terrapin are twice as good as those which eome from Delaware and other parts of tne country and they will bring twice as much in the market. There are people who make a business of catching terrapin, and all the oyster boats catch them when they can. The terrapin often run in shoals and they are sometimes caught with seines. As many as a hundred have been taken at one haul. They are often caught in the fall and packed away in barrels. Provided they are kept in the dark, it is said that they can be held for weeks without injury, and those which come to Washington are brought here in barrels. FRANK G. CARPENTER. WHAT DREAMS ARE MADE OF, Evidence That the Mind Reasons to the Cause Rather Than From It. From the Pittsburg Dispaten “Did it ever occur to you that when we dream our minds operate backward?" said a scientific man yesterday. I mean by this that the cause which gives the impression to the sleeper’s mind that makes him begin to dream is always the climax of the vision. We can find many examples that will sus- tain this theory. Take, for instance, a man who falls out of bed. He dreams, per- haps, that he has fallen from a precipice. The cause of this dream is the shock he receives by coming in contact with the floor. Between the time he receives the fall and the moment he awakes—in this short period, almost infinitesimal--his mind follows out the impression received by the fall, reasoning to it as a climax. Thus, when he comes to his senses he remembers having uad the vision and wonders why he should have fallen out of bed just at the moment he should have reached the bot- tom of the abyss. It would be folly to think that he had been dreaming of fall- ing, and then suited his actions to the dream by doing so at exactly that moment. I have had dreams in which explosions occurred, and they were caused by the noise of a door being slammed. The noise sound gave my mind the impression of an explosion, and so I reasoned to it. The de- tails have been so perfect and the series of incidents leading up to the explosion have seemed to take up such a great length of time that I have often wondered at ,the rapidity of thought while in sleep. In a moment Incidents can be reviewed which it would take hours to act out. I know of a friend who fell asieep while looking at a clock one afternoon and began a trip to New York in a dream. He remembered vividly the ride from his house to the de- pot; how he was stopped by a friend, who questioned him about important business; how he got on the train after having an altercation with the baggageman in regard to charges for overweight, all of which compelled him to run to catch the train; how he sat in the parlor car and enjoyed the scenery, remembering all the stations until he arrived at Greensburg, when a friend asked him to join a game of poker; how he played each hand, the pleasant recollection of several times holding four aces being plainly in his mind; how he continued playing without interruption ex- cept for dinner until he arrived at Phila- delphia, when he counted over some $400 in winnings. Then he remembered having met a friend while eating in Broad street station who talked upor a leading topic in politics; then he got on the train and be- gan reading a magazine which he had pur- chased at the news stand, finally arriving at Jersey City. He had just got on the ferry boat when his wife came in and woke him. He rubbed his eyes, and think- ing he had been asleep for some time he looked up at the clock, when he found that but three minutes had elapsed since he fell asleep. In these three minutes he had made a Journey to New York, seeing every- thing as vividly as if real. I tell this just | to show the wonderful activity of the brain of a sleeping person and in support of my theory that in A dreem the mind reasons to the cause rather than from it.” SEEKERS FOR OFFICE A Newspaper Congressman -on One of the Trials of Legislators, A WEARY, THANKLESS TASK, The Places at the Disposal of Cab- inet Officers. CUTTING OFF HEADS Written for The Evening Star. 1TH LOWEHING skies and murky fogs, the rush for of- fice continues. Men, women and children are involved. The hard times increase the rush. What adas to the pathetic char- acter of the hunt 1s the fact that those who are in office make most desperate efforts to retain their positions. Wid- ows who work to support their families have lost their situations. Old soldiers have been discharged, and among them men who have received the medal of honor. Those in need seemed to have received no more favor than those not in need. The civil service law is the only protection for them, but there are many places not’ classified and not subject to civil service regulations, In former administrations politics has been an {important factor in the distribu- tion of these places. It is a factor to-a far less degree in the present administration. The wishes.of the Representatives and of the Senators are more frequently disré- garded. Some are never consulted as to federal appointments in their district or state. Others secure appointments with very little trouble. Those nearest the heads of departments seem to have more influence than officials immediately interested. Congressmen Without Influence. All cabinet oificers have more or less ap- poin@nents. The Secretary of State is creditéd with the power of distributing for- eign missions and consulships. These ap- pointments, however,” are made by the President. It is said that Mr. Gresham really has very little to do with them. They have been distributed thus far, with few exceptions, after consultations with the Nearest assistant secretary of state. Spe- cial congressional favors may have secured a moiety of them, but the recommenda- tions of not one Congressman in twenty have been favorably considered. Outside influences swirl in and bear away the prize. While this may be annoying to a Con- gressman, it is exasperating to a Senator. The Constitution -provides that the Presi- dent may make these appointments “‘by and with the advice and consent of the Senate.” When they are made without regard to a Senator’s wishes, they are apt to provoke a comtroversy in executive session. They may lie In the hands of a Senate committee for weeks and months before they are even con- sidered. The Office Seeker from the South. If the office is an important one and the government is suffering because it is not filled, the President has it in his power to withdraw the nomination and make another one. When Justice Blatchford of the Su- preme court died, the President nominated Judge Hornblower for the vacancy. The Senate took no action. Meantime a special session of Congress ended and the regular session began. Some Senators doubtless anticipated that if the Senate failed to con- firm the nomination at the special session, the President might take the hint and nom- inate a new man at the regular session. This, however, was not done. The Presi- dent renominated Judge Hornblower and the decisive action of the Senate followed. Mr. Van Alen, when nominated for minis- ter to Italy, relieved both the President and the Senate of their embarrassment in de- clining the office. There seems to have been little doubt of his confirmation if he had not declined. Nominations for postmasters, collectors, marshals, district attorneys and other fed- eral officers, including vacancies in army and navy grades, frequently drag in the Senate. Each Senator fancies that under the Constitution he is entitled to some say before the nomination is made. If he does not get it, he is frequently able to delay action indefinitely, if not to defeat it. Minor Offices. So much for the higher offices in the gift of the government. The Secretary of the Navy appoints all the officers and men em- Ployed in the navy yards. They are not subject to revision at the White House. Before Secretary Tracy retired he placed all the navy yards under civil service regu- lations. His action has been confirmed by the new of the Navy, who has, undoubtedly, followed the wishes of the President in the matter.” Mechanics and skilled laborers employed in the yards are thus protected, while the vast army outside seeking their places are ited. = we The Office Seeker from the West. There are, however, a few clerkships and messengers not under the classified service. The strugzle for these places is terrific. It is safe to say that there are at least a hundred men for each place. The Secre- tary has been overburdened with applica- tions. The good of the service requires that these changes should not be made expedi- tiously. Politics does not always throw the right man in the right place. Indeed, in some cases where changes have been made, three or four men have been tried before a competent clerk has been secured. Under the Treasury Department. Great pressure has also been brought to bear upon the Secretary of the Treasury. His official duties have been so arduous that for months he has been unable to give even a hearing to office seekers. The few that have been appointed have been selected by subordinate officials. Collectors, surveyors, marshals, special agents, subtreasurers, chiefs of divisions, auditors and others are appointed by the President, usually upon the Secretary’s recommendation. The. su- bordinate officers in these bureaus are ap- pointed by the Secretary mairly at the re- qvest of the chiefs of divisions. For in- stance: A man is seeking an appointment as boiler inspector, He writes out his ap- plication, indorsed by different Congressmen and democratic leaders. It is placed on file at the ‘Treasury Department, and, in mosc cases, referred to the officer having charge of such mattefs. His recommendation goes a long way in securing the ofiice. Without it, the applicant is almost sure to go to the wall. There are today in the Treasury Department enough applications for office | to fill a freight train, and they still pour in upoft the department. To give taese appli- cations careful consideration would re- quire years of steady work. Nevertheless, changes are constantly being made, but the prizes are as few and as far between as those in a Havana lottery. = The Depariment of the interior. The same strain ts felt in the Interior De- partment, This department covers the pen- sion, land, census and patent offices, em- ploying thousands of men and women. The most of the employes are protected by the civil service rules. There are hundreds, however, who are not. are seeking these few places. When a vacancy occurs nearly every Congressman in the House is importuned to go to the front on behalf of some applicant. Those who make a business of seeking offices in- stead of attending to their congressional duties, with rare exceptions, appear to be as unsuccessful as others. There are Repre- sentatives who tramp the departments so cantinuously that it is hard™ to find them when their vote is required to make a quorum. As for the registers of land offices, surveyors, Indian agents and other places in distant states, they are appointed by_ the President. The War Department, in comparison with others, has very little patronage to dis- tribute. For that little, however, there is a constant fight. Secretary Lamont is emi- nently practical and distributes whatever he hag promptly and graciously. The Department of Justice has also very little patrOnage. attorneys are appointed by the President usually, but not necessarily, on the recom- mendation of the Attorney General. These district attorneys select their own subor- dinates. * The P. 0. D. Headsmaa. The Post Office Department fairly swarms with applications for office. It employs hun- dreds of clerks in Washington alone. rules. The main patronage is in fourth- class post offices. These directiy interest all democratic Congressmen. Robert A. Mat- well, the fourth assistant postmaster gen- eral, has charge of these offices. They were formerly within the gift of the first assist- ant postmaster general. It was in their dis- tribution that Adlai E. Stevenson and James S. Clarkson made their reputation as heads- | men. Some Congressmen make bitter complaints against Mr. Maxwell, but the record shows that he wields the ax as skillfully as did | even Stevenson or Clarkstn. The latter did business by spurts. Days would drag by without a removal and anon hundreds of heads would fall into the basket within twelve hours.s Maxwell works the guillotine steadily. The aggregate shows that he has made more removals since he has been in office than Clarkson made in the same time. The pressure, however, is so great that dis- satisfaction still exists. It threatened to show itself in the democratic caucus on the night of January A democratic Repre- sentative had a resolution prepared assert- ing that it was the sense of the caucus that every fourth-class post office in the country should be filled by a democrat before March. The friends of the administration, it is sald. got wind of his purpose, and the caucus ad- — before he could present his resolu- tion. An Exceptio! Case. Congressman Wilson of Washington, whose cry of “cuckoo” in the House has won him the sobriquet of “the Cuckoo Congress- man,” tells a singular story of an inter- view with Postmaster General Bissell. En- tering his office last week, Mr. Wilson said, “General, I am here in behalf of a post- master in my district. It is a vital matter. He is in great distress, and it is in the power of your department to relieve him.” “What can I do?” Mr. Bissell replied. “You can accept his resignation,’” Mr. Wilson said. “He resigned last August and the office has not yet been filled. He lost one opportunity to go into business because his resignation was not accepted. He has another chance to make a living, and he not only urges, but demands that his resigna- tion be accepted.” “Well,” replied Mr. Bissell, “this appears to be an exceptional case. I will put him down on the ‘Emergency Lists.’ ” Wilson says he got a glance at the | “Emergency List” when the name was put down. “I give you my word, sir,” he said, “there were over a thousand uames on it.” Last of all is the Department of Agricul- ture. Secretary Morton went at it with a pruning knife soon after his installation. Hundreds of female clerks have been dis- missed, but a horde of applications remain. Very few, if any, obtain places. The bu- reau of animal industry ts a part of this | department. It extends throughout the Unit- | giving employment to several | ed States, hundred persons. Aside from this and little bureaus in Washington, the patronage is very limited and the appointments ure less, Such is the field upon which the army of office seekers operate in Washington. It is | an army without supplies. Its sustenance seems to be drawn from hope alone. Con- | gressional influence, nine cases ont of ten, is a basis for this hope, but it almost in- variably proves a mirage. The applicant, in the end, finds himself without food or drink, and drifts homeward sadder, if uot wiser, AMOS J, CUMMINGS. An army of women | The United States district | most of them are under the civil service THE OSAGE INDIAN Some of the Characteristics of This Tribe of Red Men. INCIDENTS OCCURRING ON PAY MEN? DAY They Can't Punish a Cripple Even if He Embezzles. AN AGENT’S DISCIPLINE. BOUT A YEAR AGO last summer,” said A. H. Lewis, “I spent a day with the Osages. It was payment day at their capital, Pau- huska. I suppose some twenty build- ings, stores arid agen- cy structures, made up the capital. Out in a shallow valley, about half a mile from the agency, aj were camped the In- The valley is wide, but it does not have a deep effect. It looked gray and dusty in the summer sun, while now and | then some clot of evergreen showed where | some thicket of pine grew on a distant hill. There are some sixteen hundred Osages. About four hundred of these are half-bloods, or whites, admitted into the tribe. These wear store clothes of an inferior sort and attempt to distinguish themselves by civil- ized airs. The eight hundred others wear blankets, don feathers, decorate their faces with paint and are proud of it. These are the full-bloods. The Osages are a very wealthy outfit. They have some 1,500,000 acres of as good land as ever slipped from the palms of the Infinite. If any one were to buy it at anything like a value, it would | be worth fully $10 an acre as an average. Aside from this, the Osages have some $9,000,000 in the treasury in Washington, $8,000,000 of which is supposed to bear 5 per cent interest per annum. I don’t know | that the interest is ever paid, but, whether as interest or a donation, each Qsage re- ceives from his great white father in Wash- ington $140 a year in four payments. The | head of a family draws this money. If there are ten in a family, he has $1,400 a year, and spends it like a copper-colorea lord. Seven Traders in the Nation. “There are seven traders in the Osage na- tion. To the extent of the money due them, every Indian has ‘tick’ with these traders. Each family is provided with a card, with the names of the seven trad¢rs. When your Osage craves a saddle, or ten pounds of sugar, or a quarter of beef, or anything else | of aborigina! interest, he goes to the store | with his card. The hawk-eyed trader over- looks it. He finds set down opposite every trader’s name exactly what this particular child of nature owes. The aggregate, of course, makés up his entire financial embar- rassment. As every trader knows just how many squaws and papooses look to this particular buck as the head of the family, | he is therefore able to determine just how |much money the great father pays him | every three months; and it does not take | long with a pen and a piece of paper to di cover whether he has any prospective sets, and, therefore, whether he is to trusted. If there is enough money coming to him at the next payment day, he gets what he came after. If not, the trader pats him on the shoulder, smiles upon him and exhorts him to tle a string to his ambitions until after he next payment day. Then he can have his saddle, or his sugar, or his quarter of beef, or anything else he pleases. Divided Into Five Bands, “The politics of the Osage government divide the Osages into five bands. They correspond to the states of a nation, or the | counties of a state. The Osages have their head chief—a sort of president—their chief | justice, their treasurer, their attorney gen- eral and tHeir congress. This last is called the national council. It is made up of three delegates from each band. None of the offi- cers of the Osages get over a hundred dol- | lars @ year salary. The honor, and the op- portunity it affords for ‘skinning’ some- body, is regarded as sufficient without pil- ing up any great monetary bait by way of stipend. The national! council has fifteen members, three from each band. The bands have names as follows: “Salt Creek band, Blatk Dog band, Cla- rou bend, Paubuska band and Strike Axe baha. “When I was there the names of these law makers, as written out by the inter- | preter for me, were: | .“Nekawashetonga, | or ‘The-Ambitious- pokawatainka, or The-Saucy-Paola. ashashawatainka,or The-Saucy-Osage. ‘Olahawala, or The-Man-Who-Follows- Fl ames or The-Man-Who-Steps- he ‘Tehscamoie, or The-Yellowstone. ‘hawatainka, or The-Saucy-Willow. ewahehe, or The-Man-Who-Scares-Up- The-Town. “Opontongah, or The-Big-Elk. ““Moushonashou, or The-Man-Who-Walks Tke-Land. “Kathetawtainka, or The-Saucy-Chief. “Cyprian Tyrian. “Saucy Calf. Frank Ravelette. “Tsanopahshe, or The-Man-Who-Is-Not- Afraid-To-Die. | “All these officers were elected. And an Indian election ts a great scheme. The bal- lot box is inside of a sort of rope corral. This rope fence, made of picket ropes and lariats tied to trees, prevents anybody from getting within forty feet of the voting table; that is, any outside buck not employed in | the actnal business of the election. Inside | are the judges and a few select friends of the candidates, with the interpreter and the clerk of elections. When an Indian votes, the ballot is opened and read so that all the world may hear—read in English and in the Osage language, so that none may complain that it was not honest and un- derstood. As a result, fraud would seem impossibie. Zenlous Politic! =. “These Indians are very zealous poli- ticians. The schemes they will put up, the |plots they will lay, and the political pit- falls and snares they will ‘rig, would do | credit to Tammany. They will rake a can- |didate's past with a fine-tooth comb, and every story they can tell on him, whether jtrue or false, is told and retold, talked over and commented upon around every compfire in Osagedom. They have a very | Bod code of laws, I am told. Some of the faults of their criminal laws are obvious. One was indicated to me as I stood look- jing on the day I was there. A little ary, dark, -humpbacked Osage was standing near. He wore the clothes of a white man, jand I took heed of him as the only crip- pled Indian I ever saw. What Indians do with their cripples is never explairt™@, but there are never any about at any Tate. This particular distortion, who had a shrewd, keen, weasel face, was named to me as a former treasurer of the tribe. |“ ‘He ‘loped off with $30,000 of our mone; My informant was a full-blooded Indian, with the commonplace name of Bill Con- nor, and was much feared and respected in the tribe for intelligence, as well as for traditions touching his bloody ferocity. ‘How was that?’ I inquired. “Why, he was treasurer,’ continued Connor, ‘and the cattle companies had just paid their rents for our pasture land. Of course this man got it, and the next we knew he was away off in Flori ing the money like a drunken sailor. We didn’t, in fact, know of his whereabouts for about a year and a half. When we did locate him the money was gone. “ “Did you punish him when he returned? was asked. “Yes,” replied Connor, ‘he was tried for what would be embezzlement under your laws, and found guilty, but we couldn't de anything with him.” “Why not? ‘We have only two Connor, ‘whipping and death, but the law excuses a cripple. If a man is crippled, the idea is, I suppose, that he has been punished in advance by the Great Spirit for anything and everythifig he can pos- sibly do. So, no matter what crimes he may commit, the nation, under its laws, punishes him no further. All we could do with this gentleman was to stop his an- ruity. Payment day does not mean any- thing to him, for he does not get a splinter.” A Man of Importance. “This Connor, as I said, was a full-blood- ed Indian, and while not a chief, or hold- ing any office, was a man of considerable importance. He had been well educated at the Catholic school, and was withal @ very earnest member of that church. So eartest in truth that he was on rather bad terms with the agent, against whom Con- nor spent most of his time formulating gunpowder plots with the gunpowder left out. Connor had seen a great deal of the white men, and had been to Washing- ton several times. He spoke as good Eng- lish as anybody, Among white men he, as well as some other Osages, had a bad reputation. “The Osages, as a nation, never made a fight against the whites, yet they are known as @ very warlike outfit, as prone to steal horses and cattle, as prompt to take scalps, as the sparks to fly upward. -They always hed the sense, however, never to invoive themselves in trouble as a tribe. Their long suit was encouraging such cop- per-colored idiots as the Kiowas, Cheyennes and Arapahoes into some fool theory that they could whip the earth, and then all the Osage bucks who wanted to be in the game would, as it were, enlist under the ban- ners of their neighbors and fight and steal, assassinate and burn houses to their hearts’ content. After Uncle Sam's soldiery had Wiped out the war, these Osages would re- turn with their plunder to their own tribe and leave their guileless allies to settle. ishments,’ sald Connor, it is said, was, distinguished in this way. An Agent's Discipline. “Speaking of his troubles with the agent, I was tcld that when the then agent, Miles—a gentleman with a very thorough knowledge of the Indian character—came to the Osages, he found the redoubtable Connor going about in blanket and breech- clout, with feathers in his hair like the rest. The full-blood Osage in bis primitive meth- ods of thought refuses to wear a white man’s garb, or speak a white man’s lan- guage, because, as he says, ‘he will die if he dces as a white man.’ The agent, how- ever, knew Connor had no such excuse. He called in the gentleman and remonstrated against his aboriginal make-up, and told him he knew toc mucn to wear a blanket, and that he wanted him to put on a white man’s outit, for a moral effect on the oth- ers, and teach them that death didn’t lurk in the deep recesses of a cutaway coat, and that the breeches of modern construction didn’t lead to everlasting life. Connor scornfully declined. He claimed it as his -merican right to wear anything he pleased; be would wear a blanket and a feather until he saw fit to lay them down of his own accord. “The agent was a man of few words, but Vigorous policy. He seized on Connor, lav- ished a set of legiocks on him, placed him in a sitting posture up against the rocky face of a big cliff, puta hammer in his hand and told him that he would keep him there creaking rocks until he had reduced his mind to the acceptance of coat, shirt and reeches. “Connor was stubborn. For four @ays he languidly broke rocks. Other Osages came and contemplated Connor at his labors. They encouraged him even as a man who suffered for the public good. But at the end of four days Connor's resolu- ticn gave out. He exchanged his blanket for the garb of a pale face, and when F met him he had so far lapsed and fallen, end was so utterly broken in spirit, that he even wore a necktie.” : Se Sir Andrew Clark on Work and Idle= mess. From the London Daily News. It is well known that the late Sir Clark had a contempt for the vow tan hard work hurts a man. From the latest of the series of articles reproducing in “The Lancet” instructions given by him in clinical medicine at the London Hospital we make the followirtg interesting quota- tion, reviving, in his own words, a bit of autobiography, with the substance of which our readers are already familiar: “Labor is the life of life. And especially is it the life of life to the delicate. And when any or- gan is sick it is then truer than in health that even in sickness and delicacy it is better for the organ to do what work of its own it can, provided it can do it without injury. And I can say to you from @ con- siderable experience of tuberculous pul- monary disease, I can say with perfect confidence, that those who have done the best have usually been those who have occupied themselves the most. I never knew my own parents. They both died of phthisis. At the age of twenty-one I my- self went to Madeira to die of phthisis, But I did not die, and on coming back I had the good luck to get into this great hospital, and in those days they were not very pleased to have the Scotchmen coming to London to eccupy such appointments. The members of the staff had heard that I had tubercle and they wagered 100 to 1 that I would only have the appointment six months at most. The reason given for that was that I did not eat and worked too hard. 1 got the appointment. Thirty-eight or thirty-nine years have gone since that time and it is all the other doctors that are gone. Only I am left here on the staff—an old gentleman—not dead yet.” There was one little mistake here, as the editor of “The Lancet” points out. ‘Sir An- drew Clark had for the moment forgotten that Dr. W. J. Little was still alive. Labor is life, said Sir Andrew Clark, but he continued in the lecture above quoted, “worry is killing. It is bad management, that kills people. Nature will let no man overwork himself unless he plays her false —takes stimulants at irregular times, smokes too much or takes opium. If he ts regular and obeys the laws of health and walks in the way of physiological right- eousness, nature will never allow him or er person to work too much. I r yet seen a case of breaki down from mere overwork alone; but admit that it is necessary above all things to cultivate tranquility of mind. Try te help your patients to exercise their wills in, regard to this—for will counts for some- thing in securing tranquility—to accept things as they are, and not to bother about yesterday, which is gone forever; not to bother about tomorrow, which is not theirs, but to take the present day and make the best of it. Those affectionate women who will continually peer into what Hes beyond never have any present tite at 4 are always erizzling over the past or pry- ing into the future, and this blessed today, which is i that we are sure of, never have.” —_——__ ++ —__—_ The Door Bell, From the Somerville Journal. Just who tt is that st Making the door bell 5 ite frequently yon Woulda't go, When the door bell rings. flow of langu the door bell rings. oe ce las be end, When ways at your busiest time, door bell never put in rhyme joor bell rings, Bat to the door you Ww x You see, you're curious to know Just who is on the portico, ‘And so outsiders get a show, ‘When the door