The Daily Worker Newspaper, October 4, 1924, Page 11

=== RUSSIAN NOTES (Continued form page 1) green beans and horseradish—for a ruble and a half (75 cents). The nepman had consumed much beer and one of them called the waiter, using the Russian word for servant instead of “citizen” or “com- rade.” The waiter very politely, in- formed him that there had been a revolution in Russia and that there were Do more servants. “ff tavarisch sticks in your throat,” he said, “the least you could do would be to call me citizen.” The nepman flew into a towering rage and following the Rus- sian custom everyone in the little garden where we were eating took part in the argument. He asailed the Soviet government in vitriolic terms and when someone said “Here is one they: forgot to send away,” referring to the Commission for the Suppression of Counter-Revohition, now abolished -—the nepman said, “Those days are gone!” “They were not such bad days,” said the waiter, “and maybe they went too soon.” A man wearing a golden beard that reached half-way to his waist advised the nepman, “You had better get out of here before you say something you will be sorry for,’*6hly to have the nepman, who seemed on the verge of apoplexy, turn on him with, “A beard is supposed to be a mark of wisdom but you are the same as these other fools!” Everybody laughed at the bearded one and the népman, appar- ently feeling that he had scored a point, threw a coin on the table and said to the waiter, “Here is your tip.” He turned to leave but the waiter pocked up the money and announced: “You have attempted to bribe a public servant before these witnesses and I should call a military policeman and have you arrested but it is better that you go. Take your bribe with you.” The nepman turned, hurled a curse at the bearded man, and left the res- taurant while everyone leaned back in their chairs and laughed till the nepman’s companions paid their bill and hurried away after carefully call- ing the waiter “tavarisch.” es. ¢ # There are few drunks in Moscow but about two o’clock one morning I met one who was singing loudly a Red Army song as he zigzagged down the street. He was met by a policeman who asked what he had been drinking. Interspersed with bursts of song, the happy lad replied that he had had some vodka. Vodka is forbidden so the policeman told him to come along. The drunk sat down in a convenient doorway and after telling the police- man that he intended to stay there till morning, policeman or no police- man, resumed his singing. The policeman looked worried; he too sat down. Another policeman came along and after some consulta- tion each took an arm and lifted the singing drunk to his feet. He let his feet drag, changed suddenly to the “Song of the Volga Boatmen,” the po- licemen joined in and off went the three to the jail. If one has heard the “Song of the Volga Boatmen” it is easily under- stood that it can come in very handy for the kind of heavy labor that the policemen were engaged in. *- * # The All-Russian Municipal Workers’ Union held its national convention while I was in Moscow and I was privileged to attend as a guest of the organization. For something like four hours there were presentations banners from other organizations of workers and peasants and then came a pageant representing the history of labor from earliest time down to the present. The various spectacles of which the pageant was composed were staged to the accompaniment of a 60-piece or- chestra and a sort of poem or chant that was recited by all the members of the cast. The spectacles were beau- tiful and deeply impressive as well as perfectly acted. There was not a slip in the whole three hours, There was plastic dancing as perfect in exe- cution as anything L-have ever seen. Every person in the orchestra and all the actors and dancers were members in good standing of the All-Russian Municipal Workers’ Union. “These facts are important but it was not until after the curtain had hidden the last act of the pageant that I was able to explain to myself a puzzling something about the whole affair. It was the amazing fact that there were more or just as many people in the pageant as there were in the au- dience. Were such a spectacle to be staged in the United States, it would require months of preparation and would have to,be presented to a crowd of 5,000 people if the bare ex- penses were met. The All-Russian Municipal Workers’ Union has staged this spectacle simply for the enter- tainment of its delegates and with the exception of a few privileged persons like myself that is all that were pres- ent. > * Bookstores. People reading. Work. crs reading as they eat their lunch on the job. Workers reading in the street cars and the cafes. Workers reading in the parks. Clerks reading in the co-operative stores when customers are scarce. ‘ Bookstores on every corner. Three or four in each block in the business district. Open-air bookstands every- where, Pedlers: with racks of books and pamphlets swung from their restaurants. “The Whistle’—the official daily paper of the All-Russian Union of Rail- way Workers has a circulation of over 300,000. “Isvestia” has a circulation of 500,000 with over a million appli- cants for subscriptions on file that cannot be filled for lack of sufficient technical equipment. Every union with its daily paper and numberless magazines. Special publications for and by every kind of workers’ organi- zation—educational, technical, cul- tural. The Soviet government is the biggest publisher in the whole world, says the report of the United States department of commerce, More than 300 volumes on Lenin and various phases of his life and ac- tivity have been published since his death. eee “The Life of Henry Ford” exceeds in sales any book published in Russia. Lest any good comrade be scandalized by this seeming heresy let me hasten to say that this has nothing to do with politics, It simply means that all ma- jor political questions having been solved in Russia, the Russian workers seek in the life of Henry Ford the secret of his industrial methods. *- ¢ The Russian masses are a humorous and jovial lot. This may run counter to all that Gorki, Dostoevsky, Andreyev, Tolstoi and Chekov have written and there fore be literary blasphemy but I speak of impressions, Then Among the Civilized— 4 The party cleaning during which thousands of lukewarm Communist elements were expelled from the or- ganization was almost the sole topic of conversation in Russia for months. Of the thousands of humorous anec- dotes that were retailed in party meet- ings, union halls, in the cafes and.all other centers of discussion during this period, I submit the following to prove my contention: A comrade was called before the Control Commission for examination. He was asked: “What is your social origin?” He replied: “The same as Lenin’s.” “What is your view of the Red Army as an instrument for the conquest of power?” “The same as Trotsky’s.” “What is your style of living?” “The same as Kamenev’s.”’ “What are your views on drinking ” “The same as Ryckov’s.” “What are your views of the marriage relation ” “The same as Kollontai’s.” “What are your views on the role of the peas- ants in the revolution?” “The same as Kalinin’s.” The Control Commission consulted for a moment and then said: “Ex- pelled from the party.” “What?” said the aggrieved com- rade, “with so many illustrious exam- ples to my credit?” “Yes,” said the chairman of the Contrel Commission,” the cumulative effect is too much.” There is certainly a large and hu- shoulders on the street and in the{man quality-about this story. This same quality is carried into the humorous publications of Soviet Rus- sia. “Red Pepper” and “Hot Water” are two typical examples of this kind of journal. They are, in a way, like “Life” and “Judge” with the difference that the quips are very pointed, the names of the participants are gener- ally given and most of the squibs are furnished by workers and peasants. A few samples: “The military policeman -in blank village (the name of the village is given and also the name of the police- man) has an assistant.” “Is that so? What does he need an assistant for in such a small and peaceful village?” “To carry letters to his sweetheart.” (the name of the sweetheart is also given). ; eee “T have been here two weeks trying to see the manager of the blank fac- tory” (the name of the factory is given.) “Well, if you really want to see him you had better move your family here; it may take you all summer be cause he hates nothing so much as being disturbed.” “ee “What is all that noise in the blank hospital?” (The name of the hospital is given), “Oh, that’s the matron. The patients have just asked her for fresh bed- linen.” **e @ “The miners in blank village (the name of the village is given) have houses that are well-ventilated. The manager is a fresh-air fiend.” “Does he insist that they keep their windows open?” “No, he let’s the roofs stay open.” Now this is real humor, dealing with the sweeping everday facts of the life of the workers and peasants. Inci- deentally can you picture the effect of these pointed jests in keeping care- less comrades to the straight and nar- row path of Communist rectitude? * - * A million workers marched in Mos- cow in the demonstrations held on the day set aside by the Third Interna- tional for agitation against imperial- ist war. They marched in solid streams from all parts of the city to the Red Square carrying the tattered banners of the revolution and new ones inscribed with revolutionary slo- gans. I saw perhaps a third of these marchers as they surged past the Comintern building, the Lux Hotel and the Lenin mausoleum. McManus and I shouted greetings until we were hoarse. It was a sight that one can never forget but again it is not the most important thing that happened that day. The Russians express supreme ap- proval by seizing the person whom they desire to honor and tossing him up in the air until he begs for merey. Ryckov, who had been shouting greet- ings to the marchers from the top of CONTRASTS OF JUSTICE Among the Barbarians the Lenin mausoleum for about two hours, tried to slip into the Kremlin thru the crowd as it spread out over the Red Square. Someone recognized him and about the same time Kal- inin, president of the Soviet Republics, and Zinoviev, were also recognized. Grinning faces and hands outstretched toseizeus met McManus and I as we stepped down from the mausoleum but we threw dignity to the winds and fled. I looked back over my shoulder and saw the three men whose names are symbolic of world revolution and the dictatorship of the proletariat, the personification of the power of the workers and peasants of Russia, toss- ed in the air again and again while the happy roar of the assembled thousands made the ground. tremble beneath my feet. Cam anyone conceive of Calvin Coolidge in a similar situation? JAY STETLER’S RESTAURANT Established 1901 1053 W. Madison St. Tel. Monroe 2241 MITCHALL'S INTERNATIONAL ORCHESTRA Union Music Furnished For All Occassions | Chicago Write for appointments to M. MITCHALL, (Teacher of Saxophone) 1640 W. Congress St. Chicago, IM.