Chicago Daily Tribune Newspaper, February 11, 1877, Page 3

| l | o 1 - the most orizinalit; . THE CHICAGO TRIBUNE: SUNDAY., FEBRUARY 11, 1877—SIXTEEN PAGES BLUE GLASS. ucker on the Pptential Poss e sibilities of Light. toheock Takes His Stand Among- M G the Unbelievers. ' Tract Delusi and His Tractors, or a Delusion pakes of the Last Century. Bird's Voice Restored by the 8 0t 2 et Bay. rROM DR. J I. TUCKER. !‘mE,I: m‘;‘;:guor aof The Tribune. 50 DOTGLAS Prace, CHICAGO, Feb. 10.—It is in that there is 80 extraordinary interest felt i cted publicly and privately in_the e of Blue Glass. The writer is daily in of letters from all parts of the country advice concerning its value and use. He {560 by the remarkably liberal, compre- e ‘and expectant view which Is taken by qichurive agents of this class as ap- :’o;:" applcments at least to the {to-day. This view, as he judges Ed:‘i::l:us, is taken by botl physicians and 1aity. and he hopes that future researches in o o will widen the medical horizon and heis doubtless justified in ““';iz: o the complimentary request. of ;mwmspflndmz to the last Monday's issue, }r wiitiog amother _letter, in which it is ok DeCesEATy 10 dwell exclusively upon the e jtself, but try to open up lines of hought and jovestication in the direction of ‘ummpmfirely new matter of bringing the of patmre in many various potential escopic combinations into the arenaz of pegiene. Bloe glass, or the effect of the actinic }10( the sun, is one of these azents, and has B ko far as this part of the world s eptered upon its career of experi- wting “::::i’- Epough 15 koown already z e us in going on with “every 4 of an exuberant outcome. How many are who have been lansmishing for nts as these! How many there are home tor the thermal and medici- . for Flonda, Nasssu, Cuba, and Jecuone, who would. gladiy have availed them- selves of tropics! influences within the limits of homes. There are many reasons to here. sach a5e! ‘whohave left their OFD 2 \lievéthat we have been permitting ourselves torelapse into the ‘mental and moral condition ¢s man with the muck-rake, and while n\if:{:\s unwilling eutirely to ignore what- ever of valge there may be concenered in the +ravs, the emall Eticks, ‘and cust of the fioor, he Fonld not Ike to_ lose signt of ffihed(;elc%lfl which s just above our heads. This O aps 0 In the fufantile age of med- al science, but ot Now, when the nervous sys- Jem hes become guch an important branch of i study,—the most difficult and profound of the spedalties into which the medical profes- gion fe divided. It Dias one of its ablest repre- geaietives In Chicazo in the editor of the Journal of Mental and Nervous Diseases, and we Jare becn made conversant Wwith many of the important _facts of neurological science, throceh the pflb\iihed lectures of Prof. Brown- Seuard delivered recently before the Lowell Justitute in Boston: The 1ormer views of medi~ due have been very discouraging. It was a imitive medicine, which began and ended in Eglrflm of the liver. There was a certain anaity in blue pill before it was proven to ‘Bave no specific sction upon the liver, as had beenheld for 3 long_ time. There was much reazon 1o all into the despondent tate of mind of him who sang: And so from hour to hour we ripe and ripe, “ind then from hour to hour we rot and rot. nd thersby hanzs a tale. 3 Hitherto the hizher medical themes have been $01 preat extent monopolized by German trans- ceadrntalists; but the time bas come for the American to give them a practical application. These themes have, hiowezer, Dot altogether es- aped the potice of thinkers on the Western Continezt. E‘_‘rllm the ;thulmi‘ jcufi:fléfl prfilw)m. lostrations of this fact. For instance, Dr. Coan, in the Galazy of & few years back, wrote 3 mieresting article on the science of temoer- ments. The writers th’sie c{scrvntions(shg;v in the Uscussion of this mbject are Caldwell, Buchanan, Thomas, Rich- - srud, Cabanis, Powell, and espedially Prof. Husloy. These writers came to the con- Son that there was an intimate relationship between tempersment and color. Ramsey holds that black or carbon man is. ttl:‘eb mfiu&. of the arboniferous era. and probably e same tanses which have. blluc'uefi the Caucasian have made his race intellectusl and dominant, and in l.l]l ra:e:dtbemls a qui\ie constant relmog' of wlorend character—white men corresponding fi 8 comginafiuu h;\O{‘ the wervous, snngtfine. lions, snd | tic temperameats, vellow muwlhelymygix‘:mc. brown_tu the sancuine, sod black to the bilious.” * Each of these four great dlasses of men bas taken the very form * md quality of its tissues from the influence of dlimate and goil, tne bath of actinic and thermal gflnbn&-:s in whé‘q:, for cuuti’lt!css c)[:cm{:?t.(;ns, x; o stoc] " The above classification of umbcnmentpfim:]udus both the pbysical and mental oreanizations, and they are related thus: saneuine and thoracie, bilious and basic, Ivm- platic and abdomine], nervous and cerebral. #u‘;mflsmfion; of the first rémy bgmmcnflfu:;d L. m, Petrach, and Gen. tt; of the eecond, Dante, Mobammed, Cortes, Charle- grln:e- M&h{x}lj{ XIL;, -.mddLnny L{m}(inrfitgu; of il eridge; and of the fourth, pre- eninently the Auolsz‘.\e Paul. But this so-called science of temperament, having some foundatiop in fact. is, nev- entheless, like jurisprudence,—and ex-Secretary Bautwell would add, political economy,—a sort of extrescence, 2 human invention, intended to meet & temporary emergency. Real science is less speculstive, and more exact. A iseasy to weigh the plancts, determine g:}r‘u-mq:m(ion ud caleulate lhcix"“;lést;m:c’; stanre of Sirius, for instance, cauti {ul stor pear the c;n:’mltn:ion of Orion, whici is i:‘l‘xgr‘ hre:mrm from us o%lxsat its “zh‘;};;fl amlxl(mr,g b more than 4 eof miles 4 second of time, l;ce«?‘s nb%nlg;:gmteun years ::"m?ns; therefore we are 208 sg.;lin%.z this asit appeared in the year 1860. The con- ‘mmunput snth‘gt:x;cfidnns facts affords an eadlring gatisfartion, because they are capable ol muthematical demonstration. + What fnterests us more than all else just at 1his time is light and anything which eéxplains B S e o s any cffect, ] t may c: Iataral etate or artificially modified upon the bomsn organism in health and discase, and ¥hether not only the light which we daily be- Bold, but s different sczments as it fs dissect- € by the sclentist by mesns of his spectroscope |- d other modern sppliances may not be com- Daled at will to do service in the hands of the wslclan. Life itsclf fs but the expression of integritv of our animal organisms sustained J&ery moment by constant interchanges with £wrrounding media, oue of these media being ‘&"1 a0d light, as we all kmow, being but the &2 of the vibrations or undnlations of the subtle gther filling the space between us and the Yominary bodies, daily plaving tunes, so to ',:u&flvon our eves, just ns soand plays dif- tocut tunes 1o our ears. It is quite necussary 821 3 clear conception of these fundamental mindples. T hopethere will be a_geeral in- awakened in the study of scicnce, and Y just now in the svience of light and ®md. Nothing will be found that can com- e in interest and profit, whether we are seek- 3o et from suffering or food for thuught. al interesting by far arc Goethe and Tyn- 98 Sound and Light and the * Great Archi- 182t " of Mungo Ponton than the most thrilling ance of Charles Reade or Wilkie Collius, By study we shall find that this light which is 2t down to us from the sun is by Do mesns ble as it scems, for mreen trees snd pre- Mflflmsmd al the objects we bebold with fufinite variety of tints arc really black 2t o 't and do not. present their characteristic 'kf; 10! white ligfl: shines upon them, and light combines every possible color, a5 we o all kmow, and as Nesston demonstrated by Pl kfl:nerxupergmeng which every cu}ld lthn m ugh a zular piece of glass mwmedmml"m ; £ blue glassis with the subject of blue glass m'»“’"”dlI‘dume PR attenilon belore namely: color-blindness. 0 0L X fi‘,.'u"’ that willfal ‘biladness of those who have fastosee and will mot see, but of those wno d;uq"' togee and cannot see.- The former 853 18 larely represented in the present geu- Inalst iere ave pessimists everywhere who on taking -the most unfavoradle view of . ‘&m l.hough the contrary is as clear and bpe-t the das. To them”eversthing s hum- o Church, State, and Society,—in erldne, - Law, and Theology. To ‘them f157 sdvanced thinker in thealugy is 3 heretic, ahoitcs 2 revolutionist, fn science acharlatan, 2418 medicine o quack; no modification or im- it in the existing state. of things isad- Vhditle—all “changes are changes for. the *thaes all novelties, drrors, arzuments against theary opinicns s:skisu-y; £1ste . which thelr b ies do nut explain trivial, We aresoon to shipwrecked lie Eneas against the rocks of barbarism. Of course ol rankest mo: delusions. Hthee uslghtin e eother classis rarer,but to be met with ever: Dow and then, We have all met with beraon’s nhho could not distinguish our national air from the Oratorio of Messiall, 60 there are other per- s0ns who bave no idea of color. This is fre- ?ficnuy the cause of railroad accidents and of £ se testimony in court. The sence of vision r;:a passed throngh tne aeons of evolution like other senses. ‘There was a time when color Z’l?fli; nth;fnry'; d‘;flercn:_ h‘:xpressinn upon the 1t ‘does at’the present moment. The old Indian book of rcv(gntion, the Veda, and the Pessian theological. scripturcs of Zoroaster, the Zenda Vesta, * make mo mention of the bine color of the sky, but call the heavens black. The words translated blue in the Old Testament and the Koran of Mohammed are sald to signify an entirely different color. It was rather startling to hear a member of our Philosophical Society say the other d?{ that the human eye was atter all a very imperfect orean in - view of what it would become in course of tine; but the writer culled to mind the saying of a German philoso- pher to the effect that if the human eve were sent to him as a specimen of a perfect optical instrument he would send it back with censure. There is a steady uninterrupted move:nent for- ward in eversthing which God has created, and everything which falters by the way is in a short, tim¢ weeded out and destroyed. Now, as the whole is the sum of all its parts, it follows that what is true of all Goa's creation is true of the science of medicine, which con- cerns most solemmly the very image of .the Deity—man. Whatever contribute 1o his hap- Rgness is no mean thing. Whatever can relieve is suflering should not be passed by with a heartless sncer. It may be light, hent, or elec- tricity, cinchona, bromine, or the poppy. We have already ledrned much: conrerning their power to cheerand to heal. The truth of one age may become the laushing-stock of the next. Let us, howerer, press forward! In the words of Mandsley, “*Let it be our prayer that when that day comes, and this geeration come u for critical judgment as an histoijcal study be- fore the tribunal of posterity, it may be justly said of it that it has done as much for the prog- ress of mankind as some of the generations upon whick the wisest of us look back, per-’ haps, with indulTent compassion, and the un- wise among us with foolish scorn.” The pros- ‘pect is, it will bave done much more. . Jaxes 1. TOCRER. o A CHEMIST'S VIEWS. v the Editor of The Tribune. Carcaco, Feb. 9.—For some time back much has been written in your columns relating to thie use of blue glass for the cure of disease. The exact object to be attained by the originators of this scheme by advertising throuzh the papers in this manner is not evident on the face, unless it _be notoriety. But with this matter I have nothing to do, onl® premising that [ velicve therc is some object to be attaioed beyond the mere benefiting of the public. The question of primary importance is this: TIs there any advantage in the use of blue glass or any other colored glass in curing disease? Tt is a fact, without doubt. that these articles re- ferred to will induce many of our inteilizent citizens to put blue glass in their houses, taking it for granted that by so doing they will make them more healthy, aud secure to themselves immunity from disease. But is.it not strange that so many will act upon this matter witbout asking the why and the how about it? Now, be- canse I believe. thala great many will be in- duced to spend time aud money on this thing, 1 shall depart from my usual custom and draw the attention of the public to the scientific as- pect of the matter through your columns. I say contrary to my usual jcustum, because it bas ‘been my experience that when a sclentific man attempts to critcise any of the numerous exceedingly unscentific preductions dealt out 50 lavishly by our newspapers. day after day, he is almost certain to be reviled and insulted by some conceited correspondent who knows azbso- Iutely nothing about tue subject. This T doubt not i3 one great reason why men of good solid information make so few attempts to correct erroneous statements in the papers. But now to the cubject in hand: Iam per- fectly willing to admi: that in certain cases blue or other colored ligats might be emnployed to advantage in the treatment of discase. L'ad- mit this not because I have seen any cvidence on this subject to the cfect that Qisease has been successfully_treated in this manner, but simply from a_priori considerations. The ouly justification I oifer for this admission is the fact that colored lights certainly do affect the nerves of people and avimals. As a single instance of this, I call to_mind the well-known use of the red cloth toincite the rage of thewild bullin the Spanish arena. While some colors are exciting in their action upon the nerves, otlhers mav be found quicting. or soothing. Tt is therefore not unreasonable to_suppose that colored lights wmight be found of usein the treatment of insaue persons or in certain nerv- ous diseases. 1t seems to me that I have some- where read an article which goes {nto this mat- ter Lo sume extent, but I am unable to recall it now. But as regards the cure of such diseases a3 some of your corrcspondents mention in this connection, such, e. g.,as phthisis, lung com- plaints generally, dropsy, dyspepsia, rhcuma- tism, by the use of blueglass, 1do not besitate for o moment to say that it is all humbu. Thisis a very arbitrary manner of disposing of such testimony as has been brought forward in support of the blue glass, to be sure. Bat look at the justification. In the first place, as to the value of this testimony from a scientific stand- point. It is worthless, and for this reason: Not one of these experimenters has given us aoy ac- count of the ccmparative value of direct sun- Jleht through cle r white glass. and thirouzh blue. glass. Therefore 1 submit to any fair- minded man that absolutely no cvidence has been offercd indicating that the blue glass bas in any way improved the valuc of sunlight in the treatment of thesediseases. This also shows us that these zentlemen, houest, and keen, aud reliable as they are in business, are not to be trusted to make sclentitic observations, because they lack the necessary training which sucn an observer must nave before Le can igtinguish between the real and sppareut cause of an effcct. 3 There is nothing derogatory in this, for they have simply overlooked certdin sources of error, Decause they are not._trained fn scientific obser- vation, which a scientific man could not possibly overlook. Thus, as before stated, all this evi- dence is worthless from our present standpoaint, and we may justly say, also, that we cannot ad- mit that the alleged cures are sufiicicutly well- anthentizated to hel accepted a8 ehndenne of the ue of the blue-zlass treatment. fil(jolng pow one step furtner, let us look at the character of this bluc light as compared with Commou sunlight. Saulight is made up of heat rays, luminous rays, and chemical rays. ‘When tis light Is passed through a prism it s decom- posed and the different rays arc scparated from each otlier. forming 8 spectram, in which the heat rays are most iutense at one end, and from this end we pass through the colors red, orange, Sellow, green, bluc, indigo, violet, then through the durk chemical rays. Now, if we take a icce of bluc glass and cxamine this spectram thronght it we find that we can see only a single portion of it, viz. :the blue. Thatis, the lueglass Phuts out entirely the red, and the grecn, and the yelloyw, and violet, sO that, we caunot see them while the blue passcs throuzh. Now, what do we learn from this? Two Hhings. First, the blue glass s incapable of add- ing any blue lizht to the amount always present inthe sunlizht; otiwrwise it would allow us to sec some portion of the spectrum other than the blue which would appesr blue also Lhmufih the glass. Second, that the valueof the blue glassin treating the diseases last mentioned, as com- pared withthe sunlight, lies not in the blug rays trausmitted, but in the absence of the red, and yellow, and green; and violet: I submit, then, to uny sclentific man, or to any man who is capa- ble of understanding these " facts. that it is not the blue ray that cures disease, but the n!dh(‘)r yellow, or grees, or violet, that aggravates 1e Jiscase. Such being the case, as it undoubtedly must be, it docs no more Zood to expose a foot, or a hand, or_ & head, orany other part of the body to tne direct bue light to cffect the cure. All'tnat fs necessary s to shut out these injurious rays irom the room, since the blue ray urative action. h‘g:tolclmvc'l:ken up much space already, and 1 must stop here for fear of being tedious. 1 have only to add that Iam astrong ndvomtc‘n sun-paths, not ouly for invalids, bub to(\i zué strongest constitutions. The wor d would nof De balf so_uuhappy i€ there were -more smi; shine in onr houses, and tender beefsteak wit plenty of vegetables on our tables. Pror. Roxyx HITCACOCE. e et The Trivune Eattor. 3 Cmc.mg:’ E“’::‘b. 10.—I wish to remind our blue- glass friends that they ought to b:_se their opin- jons on observation and menencc.d le’zJely Yonght to be cantious, and be governed by the pas’t. In 1796, Ehsha Perkins, a success- ful phyiclan in Conuccticnt, invented the metallic tractors. They consisted of two instruments, one of brass and the otber of steel. He pretended that they were of a puc%}‘hr x‘:voem; postion, nd bad FoR LU (e ends three inches long, 1 o be particalarly usefal in pains in the uead,lfifi.e, E::)nr;i.s s:;l:a ug:‘ de:c"fl:‘e‘ ;!Dlie;ga&ségg fnfim:ncnts were. apolied affected part, and then drawn over downvward direction for twenty minutes, more or less. For a few years this way of curing a certain class of patients, mostly women, but always persons of a nervous temperament, was very Yopular. not only in this country but in Europe. n Copenhaeen twelve physivians and surgeons, most of them leadivg men in their professions and teachers In the Royal Medical School, begun a course of cxperiments, .the results of which were published in 2 large octavo volume. They gave their influence in favor of this new system, which they named Perkinism. In the ~ United . States the faculties of those medical schools recommend it. In London a Perkinian instltution was established for the | benefit of the poor. The cases of cures werc very numerous.. Over 5,000 cases were publisbed and were certitied to as actual and real by eight medical professors, by forty physivians and sur- geons, and by thirtv clergymen. Some one took the trouble of collecting the names of the persons cured by this process, and also 2 list of - the _ diseases of which they _were cured. This list of persons contained the names of thousznds upon thousands in all ranks and conditions of life. The ministers, whu, as a dags, have ever been, credulous. luoked upun Pegkinism as a new form of mir- acies, and the physiclans, who, 23 a class, have ever beeu diseatistied with the old process of curing, and been searching for something new, soon suw the tractors full into neglect. Both in‘el clergy and the physicians found it to be olly. 1ought to state, as a matter of fact, that this same Dr. Perkins invented, also, an antiseptic medicine. Anxious to test its power against yellow fever, Le repaired to New York in 1799, when this disease prevailed there, contracted it, and aied. Al BLUE GLASS IN LOSS OF VOICE. To the Editor of The- Tribune. CHicAGO, Feb. 10.—An interestiug case has just come to my knowledze which ilustrates the inflnence of the violet ray over the vocal organs. The paticut is n canary bird belonging to a lady on Michigan avenue. This bird, once a splendid singer, lost its voice ahout two years 8o, pmmm[y from a cold. In this respeet cana- ries resemble prima donnas, who are often the vietims of aphonia if they, are attacked by a severe cold hiter using the voice. This bird’s cage was placed inawindow where the blue-glass had been placed. In a few days it seemed more lively than usual, and in a week began to sing vigorously. This loss of voice ‘was probably paralytic, and the rapid recovery was something almost marvelous. It is my be- lief, bused on some considerable study of the composition and cffects of the vivlet ray, that it aets on the nutrition vt the nerves, and, that its true sphere of therapeutic action will be found to include affections of the cercbro-spinal ner- vous system, which, it is well known, supplythe nerves of motion, sensation, and nutrition. . E. M. Harz, THE TELEPHONE. Horror of an Evanston Ope rator-- Waltzing by Telegraph. Prof. Elisha Gray and Mis Wopderful Invention-.. How It Works. A telegraph operator at Evanston the other night was frihtened almost out of his wits by .hcnring his “cut-out board ™ play * Ninety and Nine.” When capable of thinking—for aston- ishment non-plussed liitm for a moment or two —he concluded that Sankey was sitting on the top of a pole somewhere along the line sending 2 mesgage to the stray sheep to come into the fold. Another person, seated fn his Lome st Highwood, heard the music at the same time, but he was not at all alarmed; gratification ex- presses his state of mind, This was 3Mn C. H. Summers, electrician of the Western Union Company. Before him, on a table, was a small box, nearly square, with a magnet and wire atiached. Seventy miles away, in Milwaukee, the Opera-House was crowded with ?‘uo&\c gssombled to listen to the lecture of C. . Haskins on clectricity. They also heard ihe hymn, and saw the box, and the magnet, and the wire, and were beside themselves with de- light at this trinmph of science. "The one directly responsible for the fright of the operator, the gratification of Mr. Sum- mers, aud the setting of Milwaukee by the carsis MR. ELISHA GRAT, the inventor of the tclephone, and the gentle- man who was manipulating the istrument was Mr. W. M. Goodridge, who was _at the office of the Western Union Telegraph Company in this city. Mr. Grar, In connection with Mr. Goodridge, bas been hard at work since 1373 developing the telephone, and he has made such procwess as to insure the accomplishment of his object,—the sending of cight messages over one wire at the same time. The musical feature, not as vet developed to its full extent, is sinply & novelty, —evideénce of what can be done. What may come out of it, Mr. Gray does not kuow, since the instrument Is capable of eiaboration. Already, though the teleplionc, a8 at. present constricted, is not specially adapted for it, Liar- mony cau be sent as well as melods. Tlie invention may be said to consist of THREE PARTS. One is transmission of simple melody, which is received upon 2 marnet; anotner ist he transmission of cither chords or discords,— composite tones,—which can 2ll be received on a siugle instrament; and the third is receiving on instruments that analyze the tones and pick out the one to which each instrument is attuned. This is the valuable feature,—the ability to traus- mit composite toues stmuliancously, each tone passing over the wire at a certain vibration and preserving its individuality at the receiving end, and thus enabliug the operator to | the tone which his ¢ box” 15 desizned to receiv THE SENDER. The sending instrument, if the term is per- missible, is virtunlly an cléetrical organ. 3t con- sists of reeds made of stecl, tuned in the ordi- nary way to the musical sunic, and these reeds are kept in vibration by means of galvanic bat- teries. Wien the operstor begins to play on the keys, the whole serics of recds are started and bezin vibrating, and the noise made is deafening when the doors of the organ are open. A green baize covering on the inside deadens the sound when they are shut, and nothinz can then be heard. The keys close the main cir- cuit through thetr corresponding reeds, and sound the notes, which vibrate the line. " The instrument now in use bas sixteen notes, and any tune can be played that comes. wiznin that compass. It Is unlike any musical instrument, except as to the attuning of the reeds. THE RECEIVER. The receiver is o wouden box, alarge one for alow note anda small one for a high note, varying in size from eight inches long by four wide to two fect by one and a quarter. On the top, fasteued securcly, is a magnet, towhich are’ attached the *iu aud out’ wires. The armatoure mounted on the magnet is fixed rizid- 1y at one cud, and is made to vibrate in front of thie other pole. The magnet will give off any tone, and the box whicl: is attuned to the particular sender will takeup the note and resound it. THE PRINCIPLE, in Mr. Gray’s words, is this: 11 T send a sound along a line which vibrates 125 times a second, and at the other end put a Lox which is adjusted. to that rate, so that if excited mechanfeally it will produce that note, it will pick up the note as it comes over the | wire and respond to_it, and to no other rate of vivbration. If two messages are to be sent an- other transmitter can be put i, tuned to the rate of 200 vibrations, and at the other end a re- ceiver corresponding to it. Thus you can mul- tiply transmitters and receivers almost indefi- nitély. A tome will always go to A box, and B tonc to B box, ete ‘heoretically, we are Himited only by the number of distin:t notes that can _be received. Practically, we do not kuow “what the limit will be. Slxteen tones bave been sent—more than will orobably ever be necessary on any one line. The_ fine adjust- ment of the instrument required will be apt to limit the number. Eight messages for a long line will perhaps be the maximum seut and re- ceived at one time. We are now experimenting with a view of cquipping a line between here and Buffalo,” Augy electrical magnet will receive a tone. In the box receivers the loudness of the tones depends upon the streugth of the bat- tery used, snd the method of mount- ing, so _as to get the best acoustic ef- fects. Thursday afternoon an experiment was made with tie largest box yet constructed, and * How can I leave you?™ and other melo- dies sounded.as-if played on a vivloncello, The notes were not characterized by the delicacy and sweetness Eeuull:u to that instrument, being coarseund barsh, yet the the tunes were readily recognized. . . . Mr. Gray is now at work on an instrument designed to make every tone print a letter. If * A" jgsent, “A" will be printed at the re- ceiving end. Analysis of sound {s the govern- ing principle.. Whén completed, these priaters will superscde the commercial instruments now in use, since they will' be much more rapid and available for long lnes. The telegraphers of Chicazo arce to give a ball ‘to-morrow evening at dMartine’s Hall on Ada street, and they” will dauce the Telephone -Waltz, cumposed by Fred Root, which is to be. played m Miwankee. . HILDRETH. of the Alderman and The Record . Gauger. - What the Files of the United States Court Say of Him, He Proposes to Run for the Council This Spring, but Is Ineligible. . The Oharter Provision and His Own Oon- fessions Disqualify Him, Everybody knows Hildreth, ex-Ald. Hildreth, and those who don’t know him have most as- suredly heard of the great Demosthenes, who in the height of bis prosperity and popularity was wont to murder the Queen’s English and run wind-mills in the Cogncil Chamber on Mon- day nights. When 2 combination of circum- stances, chiefly engincered by officers of the United States Government, compelled Hildreth to suddenly leave the bosom of his”admiring constituents, asg it were, and fly to the pro- tection of the Union Jack, the same which it was hoisted in Windsor, Canada, about one mile east of American territory, the tax-payers rejoiced, and many of them were not slow to pray that his life might be iong in the exile be had chosen. But Hildreth wounld not stay away. Thesleepy denizens of Windsor were infected with that old-fashioned sort of honesty which regarded fugitives as belng sus- picious characters, and did not enter into his scheme for supplying the city with gas. In sol- itude he pined, and, unlike Zimmerman, he found no pleasure in it. Lost fall he returned to Chicago, the only city in which a combination like unto him could hope for existence. And now, as the wheel of local politics begis in its revolu- tion to emeree from tne obscurity in which it haslain for the past*four or five months, the unabashed Hildreth begins to loom up. He is the Monsieur Tonson of the ward inwhich he resides. . The casual visitor to the city may ask WIIO 1S HILDRETH; none of its inhabitants ever do. Years ago he was an employe at one of the clevators, o_sort of check-clerk. On the organization of the Board of Trade Battery early in the recent un- pleasantness he became a member, and par- ticipated in its brilliant career iu the South and Southwest. On being mustered out of service he returned to the «city and resumed his - clevator counections. He drifted into ward politics. made himself sohd at ward meetings, and awoke one morning to find himself famous. He bad been elected Alderman the day before. This was in 1883, For two years he held this office. At the elec- tion in 1571, a local fight was made against him, and he failed to secure a re-clection. Inthe fall of 1873 he espoused the canse of the hybrid alliance known as the People’s party, and for the second time was carried into an Aldermanic chair, very much as a ship finds a lodgiog place, after having navicated for an louror twoa muddy gutter, which bas been swollen by an Aprid shower. . On the accession of Colvin to the Chief Magistracy Hildreth became his active supoorter, and in a short time became the leaser of ihe friends of the administration. was Hildreth, who engincered things so as to deprive the people of their rigiit to clect 2 Mayor at the mnnh:lsml election last spring; it was Hildreth who helped maioly to put up the job whereby the present chartér was forced upon the clty; it was Hildreth who supported Colvin in his acts of usurpation, after the people had emphatically passed a vote of want of confidence, when they clected Mr, Hoyne to the hichest municipal office in their giit; and fivally it was Hildreth, who, while an Alderman, was guailty of defraud- ing the National Government out of thousands of dollars. 4 Some time in the fall of 1878 or in the spring of 1874 Hildreth received a commigsion asan INTEENAL REVENGE GAUGER. This, it 1s stated, but not absolutely vouched for, was procured for him through the kindly offices of Jake Rehm, to whom he was useful in working things for railroad, gas, and other cor- porations ' through the Council. The reading public is aware that “lehtniug struck the whisky interests in May, 1875. There was a general seizure of distilleries, and an almost unirersal decapitation of revenue officials at that time. Frauds -involving millions of dol- lars had been discovered, and among those who had angthing directly or indirectly with the whisky trade it "was "easier' to determine the ewlty than the innocent. Hildreth was among those whose offieial heads were taken off. He protested his innocence at all times; .he was the pink of propricty, and nothing could induce him to sully the Aldermanic toga with which the too-confiding citizens of his ward had invested him. Feb. 11, 137, was a black’letter day in- the career of James 1L Hildreth. On that day a Grand Jury, composed of honest country gon- tlemen, wio believed in calling stealing iby its right name, came into the District Court,” and prescated a huge roll of paper to the Coust. This manuseript was an INDICTMENT AGAINST JAMES H. HILDRETIL, and embraced only twenty counts, of which the followIng is a synopsis: The first count sets forth the fact that Hildreth was, July 7, 1874, a Gauger at the Chicago Alco- ol Works, and that in such capacity he unlawfully and designedly permitted Hermann J. Pahiman and David G. Rush to remove 10,000 proof gallons of distilled spirits without payment of the tax, The second count s like uuto the frst, and charges fHildreth, Aung. 5. 1874, with anlawfally permitting the ¢ame parties to remove 10,000 proof gallons of distilled spirits withont payment of the tax. The third count shows up Demosthenes in the light of 8 Gauger at the distillery of the Tilinois Distilling Company, Dec. 1, 187+, and recites that he nnlawfolly and negligently permitted some un- known parties (o remove 10, 600 proof gallons with- ont puyinent of the tax. . The fourth count continues to deal with Hitdreth nsa Gauger atthe Ilinois” Distilling Company's place, and states that on the 1st of January. 1875, c unlawfully and desiznedly permitted certain unknown persons to remove 10,000 proof gallons of distilled spirits without payment of the tax. The fifth count ehows llildreth in the role of Gauger at Dickinson, Abel & Co.’s distillery, April 20, 1875, and charges that be unlawfully and neg- ligently permitted certain unknown perions to rt move 10,000 proof gulions of distilled spirits with- ont payment of tax. The sixth count recites that on the 10th of April, 1875, Hildreth was at the #ame distiilers, and that he committed the same offense, the amount of spirits being the same, 10,000 proof gallons. In the seventh count Hiidreth turns up asa Gauger at the Lake-Shore Distillery, May 5. 1874, and s charged with unlawfally and negligently permitting certain unknown persons toremove 10, - 000 frflnl’ zallons of distilled spirits without pay- ment of the tax. 3 The cighth count differs in no respect from the i%\lsnth, exceptas to the date, which ia April 7, 74. - The ninth count portraye Hildreth in the role of Gauger March 3, 1874, for Gholson G. Rcseell,and sets.forth that be allowed certain unknown persons to spirit*away 10,000 proof gallonsof distilled spirits withont payment of the tax. The tenth count reciles the same facts nt the :slx:\!rna distillery, but under a different date, Feb. 3, 74, In the eleventh connt Ganger Hildreth appenrs a6 a conspirator, May 5, 1874, with George Miller, Henry C. Fredericks, ‘and others, who™ are un- known, to defraud the United States of the ta% on 10,000 proof gailons of distilled spirits. The twelfti_count recites that. July 10, 1874, Tildreth conspired and colluded with Hermann J. Pahiman and_ David G. Rysh, and others who are unknown, to defrand the Umfcd States of the tax on 10,000 proof gallonsof distilled spirita, The thirteenth count charges Gauger iildreth with conspiring and colluding. Dec. 10, 1874, with James M. Lallentine, John Robinson, and others Who are unknown, to defraud the United States of the tax on 10,000 proof gallons of distilled epirits. “Tne fourieénth count citries Gauger IHlidreth, April 10, 1875, with conspiring with 0. B. Dickin- 2on. Jonathan' Abel, and George F. Bnrroughs, and others who are tnknown, to defraud the United States of the tax on 10,000 proof gallons of dis- tilled spirits. A The ifteenth count charges the ex-Gauger, Jan. 1, 1874, with conspiring with Gholson G. Russell. 2hd others who are tnknosn, to defraud the Unitod States of the tax on 10,000'proof gallons of dis- tilled sprrite. The sixteenth count alleges that Hildreth, Jan. 6, 1874, in the capacity of Gauger, conspired with Ttussell, and others who are unsnown, to defrand the Tnited States of the tax on 10,000 proof zal- Tons of distiiled epirite. The seventeenth count charges Hildreth, asa Gauger, with having conspireds May 1. 1574, with George Miller and Henry C. Fredericks, and others unknown. to unlawfally remore 10,000 proof zal- Jons of distilled spirits from the Lake Shore Distil- lery withont the puyment of the tax, The eizhtcenth connt charzes Hildreth, July-1, 1874, with copspiring with Hermann J.' Pablman 2and Dasid G, Rush, and others unknown, to re- imove 10,000 proof gallons of distilied spirits from the Chicogo Alcohol Works withoat payment of the tax. % The nineteenth count charges Hildreth, Dec. 1, 1874, with_conspiring with James . Bailentine and Jobn Robinson, and others unknows, to re- Tmove 10,000 proof gallona of distilled epirits from the Tllinols Distulling Company's place without payment of the tax. -~ ‘The twentleta count chi 1575, with consplring with O B. Dickinson, Jon- athah Abel, and George F. Burroughs to remove 1 20,000 prai ganions of dlisilied upisita trom the es Tildreth. April 1, | dietillery of Dickinson, Abel & Co., - et P ibe A o, Co., without pay: - TIIE VARIOUS COURT PROCEEDINGS consequent upon the oregoing voluminons charires are Dest told by giving a copy of the record, which is as follows: On Wndneaday,* Feb. 23, the following was spread on the Court records: The United Statesvs. James H. Hildreth. In- dictment. Now cowmes the District Attorney, and the defendant also comes and by counsel, and thercupon the motion to quash the indictmenticom- ing on to be beard; after argnment the Conrt, he- ing fully advired, overrnles said motion, and said defendant belng arraigned upon_ the indictment in this behalf !m;glen thereto says he is not gullty as therein charged. B . e On Tuesday June 6, the following entry ap- pears: " The United States of America ve. James II. Tildreth. Indictment. Now comes the DNistrict- Attorney, and now comes also the defendant by his counsel, and now comes on to be heard the motion of the defendant upon aflidavit to continue this case, .and, after hearinyg the defendant and arzu- ments of counsel, the Court overruled suck motion. And, on motion’ of the District-Attorney. it is ordered that a bench-warrant jssue a<ainst the de- fendant, returnable forthwith. And now comies the defendant in person, and by leave of the Court withdraws his plea of not guilty to the tirst and eleventh” counts in the indictment hercin, and pleuds guilty to said first and eleventh connts. Mere the mention of A LITTLE EPISODE not spread on the records of the court becomes nevessary. On- the-afternoon of Sunday, June 18, Hildretl' fled to Canada. He had become aiarmea at the severity of some of the sentences imposed a day or two before on a few of his crooked brethren, and determined to seek cor- poral_safety in flight. He boarded the Michi- gan Central train at the Trwenty-sccond strect station, and on Monday mbrning was safely under the protection of the British Lion. Let us resume the record, On Monday, June 19, the following appears: * The United States of America versus James H. Hildreth. Indictment. Now comes the District Attorney, and now comes also the defendant, by hix counsel, und, on motion of the District Attor- ney_ for sentence and judgment against the de- fendant, upon his plea” of lgumy to the fl“r’@ and eleventh counts of eaid indictment heretoforé en- tered berein, and after hearing the statements of. the defendant’s counsel in mitigation of sentence, and the statements of the District Attorney, the Court takes the same under advisement. Saturday, June 24, the whisky-men who had ‘pleaded gaily, or, after trial, had been adjudged 80, were called up for sentence. The following is the record fu the cuse of the Western De- mosthenes: . The United States of America versus James IT. Hildreth, ingictment. Now comes the District Attoriiey, and on his motion the said James H. Hildreth is three times solemnly called in open court and required to appear and answer the in- dictment on lile against him inaccordance with the tenor and effect of said recognizance, and comes not, but makes default, and thereunon the Francis W. Warren, phe sarety mentioned in gaid Trecogmizance, fs also three times solemnly called and rgnnimd to produce the body of tho said James H. Hildreth, in discharge of his said recognizance, comes not, but makes defaunls, and falls to roduce the body of the sald James H. Tildreth. It fs therefore considered that the defuults of the said James B. Hildreth and Fraocis W. Warren be entered, and that judgment of for- feitare be decrced againat them in the sum of $§5,000 each, the amount of sald recogmizance. Anc 1t is further ordered by the Court that a writ of scire facias may issue to them to show cause, 1f any they can, why this judgment of forfeiturs shonld ‘not be made absoiute, and that the eame be made returnable to the next term of this Court. A few weeks after the departure of this self- convicted fraud, kis friends here began NEGOTIATIONS FOR HIS RETURN. Stories were in circulation that unless things were fixed 50 he could come back and escape the penalty of imprisonment, be would turn squealer and divulge all the schemes and tricks he had ever been engaged in during his Alder- manic career. Whether or not he ever had any serfous intention of doing 20 is not known with my deree of certainty, but csrtain it is that the ramor of his intention to do so was productive of good fruit. His brother visited Washington, Promineht politicians, either through fear or sympathy, contributed their valuable aid, and an_arrangement was finally entered into by which he was accorded permission to return and roam at will, on condition of the payment of a fine of $3,00) and the costs of prosecution. It was further agreed that sentence of imprison- ment should be entered up against him, bat never carried Into effect, as a_Presldential par- don had been'arranged for. The full senteuce bas never been formally pronounced, nor has any of it, -except accidentally, been spread upon the ' records of the Court. 1n accordance with this arrangement Hildreth emigrated from Canada, and arrived here on Sept. 16, after an absence of. almost three months, He was the recipient of an almost kingly ovation at the hands of his political cronies; and the *bummers,” whose moral sense of right and wrong has become so blunted that illegitimate mafos, the result of fraud and perjury, are to them synonomous with shrewdness, were not slow to extending the right hand of fellowship, and set ’em up with & frequency which baffles the multiplica- tion-table to deeipher. A week later, Hilareth, with the air of -a man engaged in an ordinary business enterprise, visited the Government building, and fulfilled bis portion of the agree- ment. e paid the §3,000 fine and the costs of prosecation, The record of this portion of the judgment of the Court bears date Nov. 9, and 1s a5 follows: The United States vs. James H. Hildreth. TIn- dictment for violation of Internsl Revenne law. It appearing to the Court from the report of the Clerk tnat there s in the Sub-Treasury the sum of $3,- 018.17, the amouant of the fine and costs adjudged agal the defendant and paid Into coart in tois case, it Is therefore ordered by the Court, on mo- tion of the District Attorney, that the amonnt of the fine, to wit: 00, be paid over to the use of the United States, and that the said sum of $18.17 e transferred to the United States to the' order of the Judiciary Fund, and that checks be _drawn on the Sub-Treasury therefor, Lo wit: to J.D. Harvey, Collector of Intérual Revenne for the First D trict, for esid fine .of $3.000, and to GeorgeS. Bangs, Eeq., Assistant Treasarer, Chicago, for sald $18.17. i There yet remains to be soread on' the Court records the sentence of imprisonment which it isundérstood will be done at an early date. Thus far has been traced o portion of the crooked record of Jumes H. Hildreth, ex-Alder- man of the Seventh Ward: There is yet ANOTHER CHAPTER OF A DAMNING CHARACTER- It is comprised in the single ward perjury, un-- blushing perjury, committed at rcgular inter- vals during the time he was invested with the functions.of Gavger. When he filed bis official boud he solemnly subseribed to the following outh of office, which is printed on the back thereof: 1, James H. Hildreth, having been appointed to the oftice of Internal kevenue Gauger, do solemnly swear (or afirm) that I have never voluntarily borne arme against the United States since 1 hava been & citizen thereof; that I have voluntarily given no aid, countenance, counsel, or encourage- ment to petsons encaged in armed hostility thereto; that have neither somght mnor accepted, nor attcmpted to exercise, the fonctions of any ofiice whatever under any authority or pretended anthority in hostility to the United States; that 1 have not yielded a voluntary support to any pretended Government, authority, ower, or Constitution, within the United States, nnsli]e or inimical thereto, farther prear (ot afiirm) that to the best of my knowledge and ability I will suppost and defend the Constitu- tion of ihe United States against sll enemies, foreign and domestic; that Twill bear true faith and allegiance to the same; that I take this obliga- tion freely, without any mental reservation or purpose of evasion; and that 7 will well and faith- Fully dlachargs the dutses of the office on which I am atout to enter. So help me God. Once & month the Gaugers were by law re- quired to furnish a statcment of the work done by them, and to this statement was appended an affidavit, reciting that it was a true and faithfol aceount of the work performed, and that * neither he nor any metwmber of his Iamily has received, either personally or by the inter- vention of another party, any money or com- pensation of any description whatever, nor ns)' promises for the same, either directly or indl rectly, for services rendered or to be rendercd or acts performed or to be performed in connec- tion with the Internal Revenue.” In Hildreth, who at the time he was 2 Ganger represented the Seventh Ward in the City Coun- cil, is witnessed the spectacle of a man who, as an Alderman, swears to support the Constitu- tion of the United States, and of necessity the laws of Congress: who, as Gauger, swears that De will perform the dnties of his office well and faithfully; who, as Gauger, swears that each monthly statement presented Dby him to the Collector of Internal Revenue, contains o true and faithful sccount of his steward- chip—in this maen Hildreth is prescated the disgracelul spectacle of a sclf-convicted fraud and conspirator: And yet this is not all Fildreth has the insufferable impudence to an nounce to his cronies that he is again AN ALDEEMANIC ASPIRANT. The city charter has a prowision which meets r. Hildzetl's ease exactly. - Ou page 2150l the Revised Statutes, in Sez. 83, is ghe followiog, under the title, * Qualifications of Aldermen’: t-nor shall he be eligible, if he shall have been convicted of malfeasance, bribery, or other cor- rupt practices. or crimes. Has Hildreth been gailty of malfeasance? ** He pleaded gulty to baving, 88 8 Gauger, unlaw(ully and designedly permitted Pahlman & Rush to remove 10,000 wallons of distilled spirlts without. payment of tax. - He confess to having engazed fn a conspiracy- to defraud the United States of the tax oun 10,000 gallons. of whisky produced at the La%e Shore” distillers. He was charwed with similar offenses- at other laces in eighteen additional courts.. Has Hil- S.n:th been guilty of bribery? Is, it reasonabie to suppose that_be entered Into the whisky trands for the tun of. the thingi The crooked Gaugers received asthoir share of the-spoils trom sl petticont; er pretty fect and $2t2 34 per barrel, as:was developed in the Rush, M:nn, and other trials, Was Hildreth convicted of corrupt practicesi He owned up to having tecn engaged in dufrauding the Gov- ernment. Out of his own mouthhe condemned mself. Was Hildreth convicted of crimes? He comitted perjury when he violated his cath of ofiicc, aud there is in the eve ot the law .nmo more helnous crime than perjury. -Prominent- criminal and civil lawyers pronounce the . shorter provis- ion above quoted msndatory In its nuture, and it caunot e cvaded.. A Presidvutial pardon caunot interpose. ‘The languave is plain and dedisive. Conviction of malfessance is a bar to the men’s holding the office of Alderman, and uoder no circumstances can the clause be modified to let Mr. Hldreth iu. The voters of the Seventh Ward, it is_to be hoped, are not £o destitute of moral sensibfl- ity, of respect for the law, are not so weak- fill‘:‘l%fig ‘?;'"‘ thfy cmmbeirmjoled into seuding to ie City Councit as their representative a v with such 2 reputation and rcgord. e GOSSIP FOR THE LADIES. THE WALTZ. The night-air is flled with the perfume of roses, ‘The perfume of ruses, and women, and wino; My darling her dreamy eyes languidly closes, And softly her littic hand steals into mine. All sweetly her pretty head -dropp'd on my shonlder, Her head with the treasures of Orient crown'd; And ber blushes came fast at the tale that Itold her, . Of rapture and madness, while whirling aronnd. Tes, waltzing I told her my love and my yearning, ‘Nor dreamimg the futare nad focrow In store; And wultzing [ learned that, my passion returning, *'The gurl in my arms was 10y own evermore, S0 in lofty cathedrals the organ may thunder 1ts cchocs repeated from fresco-crowned vaults, And'the multitude kneeling in rapture way won- der, But give me the music that sounds for the waltz! The Angels of Heaven, in glory advancing, ‘Are singing hosannas of praise to the 3 Unless they have women, and music, and dancing, Forever unheeded by me may they sing. Oh! take not the sunshine that knows no to-mor- row, The rivers of honey and fountains of bliss, Where the souls of the righteous may rest from their sorrow, — & They have not.a joy that is equal to this. When the dead from their graves stand in awe and desponding, And 'the trumpet calls loud on that terrible day, T our names on the roll there will be no respond- ing— . To misicot Love we'll have floated away. And our sonls shall be full of the perfume of Toses, The roses of love and their perfume divine; And her head on my shoniuer forever reposes, And her hittle white hand rests forever in mine. —Newark Advertiser. AT ODDS WITH BEAUTY. New York_World A genre pleture by Rossi an artist of the Forimay sehool, is Mr. Hasletine’s latest hobby. Its suvject is Jike the opening of a fast Feydesn novel, or a “risky ** high-colored description by Gautier. The scene is a vast library that looks like the hall of the maps at the Vatican. A handsome young Professor in black velvet and satin, powdered hair and lace rufiles, 15 attempt~ ing to lecture on anatomy to two imcroyable oung women. He stands behind a great brary table; the forefinger of his right hand rests tremblingly on a skull; he looks breath- less, and in a 6tate of ecstatic angnish as if his thoughts were more on humsn icmale charms than science or memento mori. The two in- croyables are in wonderful costutnes and most audacfous positions. One i3 on a chaise-lounge, holf. buried in a green satin cushion, and dis- plays provokingly her pretty celestial silk stock- ings and gluk slippers; her graceiul bedy is hardly hidden by a gauzy, filmy gown, and ebe leaus her fascinatiog little head, that is pow- dered and has a mob-cap with scarlet ribbons, on a delicious arm and hznd. Tke other damsel is seated in a great chair, hold- ing 8 huge open book; ehe bas on a large Dblack Rubens hatand white feather over ber full bionde hair, a black mantle lined with scarlet, white fichu, yeilow over-gown, and Pompadour are stretched out on a Persian foot-stool, with blue silk stockings, black slippers, and great strass buckles. Bothlookdrowsyand demoralized. The finish of the pictuce is exquisite, you can look into it as on 3 miniature. The accessorles are finely placed and well painted; columns and draperies, a Cordova leather screen, a rich Turk- ish table cover, great books, and the map orr the wall of Italia Antica. You front the picture as from a great open doorway which leads out into the open air. On the outside brond marble steps are leaves and all the frugrant litter of out- stretching tree branches. You can easily im- agine that it is 2 summer tnorning with buzzing fifes out in the hot air,and in this library arc the drowsy, fretty, audaclons mrls, the poor young victim of a Professor, whose words arc of a3 much value in their cars as the drone of the honey-bee on the outside -flower-beds; and_he, poor man, is like a gray moth, which they may catch and fasten for amusewnent witha pinona scarlet-satin bow ! A YOUNG HUSBAND'S MISERY. To the Editor of the Graphtc. . Iam in great trouble. Itis a secret trouble. . This is the first time I-ever mentioned it to any one. I waot relief. I am a young married man. I mean I am young in marriage. I am fre- .quently sent by my wife to get tnings, I mean women’s things,—thread, pins, needles, cali- coes, muslins, cambrics, delaines to match, rib- bons of a certain shade to match something clse of a certain shade, and go on. I never do these things right. 1've tried my best and I can’t. I shudder now whenever Elmira sags, * My dear, won’t you run out and lget. me three spools of black button twist?”? I'don’t like to refuse, I g0,—20 to one of those infernal: women’s far- nishing-stores where thore are never any other customers but womew, and where a man feels as much oizt_of place as he would in any other Woman’s dressing-room. Of course,when I ask for that twist the next question is, *“What colori? Color! Of course I don’t know, and when I bring it back the twist s too coarse, or too fine, or oo something, and it fs so with ribbons, it is £o with fringe, with rufls, with feathers, with whalebone, with buttons, with the’hundred other contrivances which a woman must put on, sew on, tie on, fling on, before she calls herself dressed. DI'd‘rather undertake a trip to find the North Polathan to exccute any woman’s dress commissfon properly. They don’t know what they want themselves, and because they don’t know they visit the consequence of their own iguorance on somebody clse. Some one else has to suffer for it. -1’ve suflered for it; suffered errievously during the three years of my married fife. It has been about the only cause of trouble between me and one of the "best wives frghe world. It's the only point she’s not ra- tiohal upon—if £ may say it, sir, not sane. BROWN. THE SAFE WAY. - Detrolt Free Press. 4 The wife of a man living near Topeka, Kan., reached Detroit on her way home from the ‘East yesterday, finding herself shiort of fands, ‘having lost $35 at Niagara Falls. She weht toa hotel and telegraphed her husband to forward her $30 at once. He isn’t the kind of a man to rush headlong into auy financial enterprise, and he stopped to find out the cast of telezraning money. When he had ascertained, he waited till night and sent a hail-rate message saying be woula forward the money by mml. This wasn't entirely satisfactory 1o a wite paying $3 per day for board, but she had to wait. Inabout three days the looked-for letter arrived, and the wife was so mad that she came pear swallowing her false teeth. The husband had Incloged the one-hal? portion of three diferent $10 biils, and ExPln!n in his letter: “If these reach you safely I will forward the other halves upon recelpt of a telegram.” The way that little woman dusted over to the telegraph office and sent - him, bowie-knives, and daggers, and bullets, made the ‘stoical operator wonder if she was not some escaped lupatie. Over balf the_money will be nsed up for board by the time she gets it, and how she i3 to reach home on the balance is what puzzles ber. SPONTANEITY. Andrewe fazar. His objection to her was that, although in other respects a good wife,she lacked spoutanel- ty. One day when he was on a step-ladder ar- ranging some curtalns over the parlor windows, she spontaneously unbitched the connecting rod of the ladder and let him down all in s heap uite suddenly, a3 it were. He bas been able E‘Lm bed anit move around for the last few days.and would Jook like Eis old self if he cotld only gét tl:fu c¢ of his ear back again 2nd raise the bridge of his nose. NEZDXN'T HAVE MENTIONED IT. 2 Poston Dulletin, © He was a gentleman from the country, and had ensconced his “girl” and himseli in-the coraer of & Highland car. As the vehicle sped up Shawmut_avenue his arms. began to steal aroand his companion’s walst, and his head in-* clined lovingly towards her, unconscious of ob-- servation by the few remaining passengers., Just as the car approached Sawyer street, the conductor thrust his head inside the carand yelled * Sawryer,” in close proximity to Hay- secd’s head. “The latter, hastily drawiog him- gelf “into form,” indignantly remarked, ** You needn’t er howled it through the car, if you dia. We're enzazed,” and the rest of the iréieht set their faces toward the driver and grinned. A-VASSAR AUCTION. Yale Courant, : They have. a unique custom at Vassar, and ‘withal a very zood one for these times, when It is so much harder to get cash than to spend it. Itis acustom, too, which should be brought to the notice of the student in political econo~ my, for it creates a money value in what has heretofore not had a dollar and cent value. It is stated thus: If a “fair Vassarite” has a Young geutlemm visitor on “Phil” day or Tounder's day, it seems to be generally known beforehand. ~ As he walks up to or about the college he is at once made the cynosure of many eyes, The lady who has the good fortune to be || visited disposes of the innocent subject, aud she meets the yirls, and the unfortunate youth is sold by auction; yes, put up, struck off, sold by.the hour, to ihe highest bidder! If heis good-looking, stylish, distingue, the bids run high, the excltement. 1s intense, and the profits enormous. ' In this way he Is disposed of for the evening, and the iair one realizes a hand- Some suw, cnough to supply her with creams and pin-money for a fortnizht at least.” It ha does not possess these charming attrivutes the bidding is languid, and not miuch is reatized. Such is the custom as 'related by one of the tratlickers, E A YOUTHFUL BRIDE. Alton () Telearaph. The office of th: County Clerk was {nvaded on Sqtnrdsy by & wedding party in search of a marriage license. The affable Clerk proceeded to till out the necessary document and inquired the ages of the candidates for matrimony. The eroom’s was given 28 that of 84, while that of tbe bride was stated to be only 14. This state- ment caused a stay of proceedings, and the Clerk {nformed the finflles that it wns against the law toissue a license to & woman under 18, withouc the consent of her parents. There- upon the father of the bride, who was one of the g:‘ty, stepped forward and said the bride had his full and free consent; that she had already been married once and had buried her first husband. The astonished Clerk, rightly thinking that a would-be bride of such ripe ex- perience didn’t need any legal protection, heal- tated no longer, but made out the necessary docament, and the bridal . party went on their vay rejoiiog. Maid, wife, widow, aad married again, all within fourteen brief years, scems to be crowding thingsa little. t & history that woman will have by the time she i3 50! A CHANCE MEETING. 8t. Louls Republican. Not long ago two ladies stood st the shawl cotnter of one of the two leading dry-goods stores in St. Louls. They were unknown to each other, but were each intent inthe examina~ tion of shawls. One of the ladles was finally handed something that struck ber fancy. She turned the article over and over, with admirio; eyes upon it, and asked its pricé. She was tol what it was, and with a sich laid it down sgain. 4T Iike it,” said she; * it suits mejperfectly, but I cannot afford it. My husband tells me” that we must retrench a8 much as sible.” The pathetic saleswoman was sbout replacing the shawl] upon its shell when the other lady gpoke: . * You do not intend to take the shawl, : then, 3adamec?’ ‘No,” was the response. “Then I think I'll take it. It suits me, too, and I was only waiting for yourdetermination.' Then, turning to the saleswomsn, the last sPuLzr tald her to do up the purchase, adding, +Charge it to Mr. —."" The effect the name had apon the lady who was unable to buy the shawl was electric. ** That's my hnsband (" she shrieked, and there was a scenc upon which the curtain did not fall at once by any means. A LITTLE ROMANCE OF LOVE. Zoulssiile Commercial. There was ¢ wedding at Grace Church the other night, and the bride and groom were warmly congratulated, while many were the wishes of friends for a bright and hapoy future. Such an annomncement would not create any. surprise were it not for a bit of romance con- nected with this unitine of young hands and hearts. It is sald that the bride, a beantiful young lady of this city, had two_ardent lovers, both of whom were e?unlly confident that they had won the prize of her heart. One of the lovers lives in St. Louis, and, as the story roes, was to have been married to the young lady this evening, every arraugement having been made for the wedding; but the otber lover came for- ward, on the prestize of old love, ardentl{ plead- ed his suit, and carried off the prize, at the very" time the lover over in St. Louis was preparine . to start for Louisville to claim his bride. Heis expected to arrive this morning, with his hotes bright and soaring, ouly to learn that he has been “counted out.” CREATURES OF HABIT. Burlington Hawkeye. A culprit who was brought before a Burlings ton magistrate the other day ona charge of beating his wife, pleaded for inaulgonce aad promised reform, sayinz he did not mean suy cruelty to his wife, but it was only a bad habit he b tinto. The magistrate 8aid he would cheerfully excuse him, for he knew himself how strong were the chains of habit, and ledrrl.w- oner must not mind it, for he really didn’c . mean anythine by it, but "he was greatly addict- ‘ed to the habity of fining such cases $30 and costs, and sending them up for ten daya. are all creatures of habit,” quoted the Court, and the committee rose, and shortly afterward the house adjourned. A LOVE OF A BRACELET. . Purls_ Paver. A pretty young sctress, who is devouring the, Conrte de X., has teased him for weeks to pur chase her a love of a bracelet .on which she has Jong set her eyes and beart. Finally he sur- renders at_indiscretion—no, im the condi~ tion that if he buys it tor her she {5 never to weéar it on the stage. “Not wearit on the stage—why?"” #Q, my wife mizht see it, don’t you seel”” . ehl!""hd then there’d be trouble In the family, ©Q, no; no fearof that; but she'd make me buy her one like it.” - NOT SATISFIED.! Tirginta (Net.) Enterprise. A citlzen of Eurcka, having occasion to go home rather unexpectedly & night or two since, canght a gentleman acquaintance in the sct of kissing his wife. On relating the circumstance to a friend he- was asked if be punished the Enmv couple, and replied: “No, not exactly, " ut they must have eeen from the way I slam- - med the door that I'was not satistied.” EPITHALAMIUMS. X Detroft Free Presx. A contemporary says: *‘It is all right fo» church choirs to serenade newly-married peo- plfilbnt these are more_appropriate hymna for such occasions than * What Shall the Harvest Be? ¢Ninety-and-Nine’ wouldn't be just the thing either. It 1s tov many.”? TWOMAN’S SELFISITNESS. Castle Rock (ot -What this country needs, ladies. is a religion which will make a man feel * .that it is just a3 cold for his wife to get up aud build a fire as it is for himself. - FEMININE NOTES. * Time works wonders,” as the woman said when she got married after a thirtecn years' courtship. A hotel i3 advertised as ** kept by the widow of Mr. Brown, who died last summer ou a new and improved plaa.* 2 Andrews' Bazaar: Ayon% lmlg never scems. so sweet and artlessas when she Is tyrinx to rake the fcicles out of her swectheart's mus- tacle with her teeth. - If ‘it were not for experiments in science, nothing would ever be lvarned; at least, tnis was the oplnfon of the Newurk man who asked his wife to put ber tongue to a cold lamp-post. Yonkers Gazette: i You kissed me at the gate last night, . And mother heard the smack; She saya Its naughty to U0 80, So please to take 1t back! Rowe Sentinel : When a man Is treating a dash- ing widow to ive-cream, and sces his' wife com- ing into the restanrant, about all he can do Ista button his cont, haog to -his chair, and trust - Providence. g A Freuch fnvitstion to a wedding: **Madame._ K—— has the honor of asking you to be present at the marriage of her only dauzhter, Celine K—, with 3. de Saiut V—" etc. And ug- derneath: * Pray for her.” H ¥ If 2 Returning Boand could be established in Europe to expose the fraudulent “Counts” who bambo:zle Americangi?ls abroad; and *‘retarn *’ them safely home, the institation would be worth something.—Boston Bulltin. -