The Bismarck Tribune Newspaper, April 22, 1931, Page 10

THE GUMPS—O, HAPPY DAYS: ON EVERY ANNIVERSARY WHY. LIGHT OF My. LiFE= UY You'D BRING FLOWRRS OR SUNSHINE OF MY SO0UL- . A LITTLE GIFT OF SOME KIND=| How DO YOU EXPECT ME To KNOW YOU USED ‘To BE SO GENEROUS/ FT's YOUR BIRTHDAY “WHEN BLT NOW = YOU DON'T JHERE'S NOTHING ‘TO SHOW ~ EVEN REMEMBER WHAT THAT YOU'RE A DAY OLDER — ¥ THIS 18=_DO YOU ANB TOU, HOOK TEM YEA Liter kets! ACRVER OID 18 BIRTHDAY ? SNIFF < SNIEP SNIFF ue Wweer Loving. HUSSAND Tula ‘Zou BD To BE— bea WERE S0 KIND ANB STHOUGHTFUL WHEN WE WERE FIRST MARRIED = "ALLEY—MISERERE ie == a HE LOOKS H SO SAD TOO, HEAR HIM CRN LUKE ONCLE WALT. THAT BUT THAT'S ALU HATE TO DO tT OL TOR BUT AFTER THE MAN TRIED TO STEAL YOu MESTERDAN ALL WE CAN DO'IS TO KEEP You SKEEZIX. WE'VE JUST GOT TS GET WHERE we CAN'T HEAR HIM. “If you ever finish that treatise on Ameyican social life, I'd like to have some people in for bridge.” | NOW YOU TELL 0 oooP: OLD TIMER REMEMBERS When a man could get elected to JSR RHREERBERE SBGL KH SHGURSHH BEE. George, Jr., returned from schoo! Gisgruntled. “Dad,” he complained, “I got in trouble at school today an’ it was all your fault.” “How's that?” inquired his father. “Member I asked you last night how much a million dollars was?” “Yes, I remember,” replied George) Congress without being investigated by Mr. Nye. When “this cock-eyed world” was | just a slang expression. ‘When the good old days were 30, 60 and 90. When a woman was her husband's |helpmate instead of his check-mate. When girls promised to marry a man instead of threatening to do so. When this country was so orderly that all the natives had to fear was an attack by Indians. Sr. “Well, ‘a helluva lot’ s’ th’ wrong answer,” said George Jr. gloomily.— Kennebee Journal. I DON'T KNOW WHAT IN “THE WORLD EVER HAPPENED ‘To OETECTIVE STEELE... HE DIDN'T GET OFF THAT TRAIN, TN SURE OF THAT—ANn’ I S'POGE I'LL HANE To THERE ARE SO MANY TRACKS WERE INTHE YARDS THAT IT'S HARD To KNOW WHICH ONE OF “THEM LEADS To SHADYSIDE... WELL, ALL I CAN Do IS ASK SOMEONE AND. THEN RIKE ALONG OF THAT CAR! Gee... NEgBE IT'S A RAILROAD DETECTIVE AND HE NIGHT THINK TM TRYIN’ To BUN A RIDE, AN’ ARREST ME J! “Nevada plans to grant divorces after forty-two days’ of residence.” Doubtless the next step will be a slot} Waiter — Haven't they given you a machine which delivers a divorce| menu yet, sir? ‘when a penny is inserted. | Diner (wearily)—Yes, but I finished | that an hour ago. Peggy—I'm divorcing Charlie. You} don’t know what I've gone through, living with him. Anne—Well, everybody says it was) all he had. FRECKLES AND HIS FRIENDS Tomtit — After all, fools make life | ‘ AX Hy fl } amusing. When all the fools sre dead! I don‘t want to be alive. Dodo—Never fear, you won't. SRI RASA AWYVESVRE RY Recognized! Paint —We are gradually evolving into diet faddists. Selection of our presidents proves that. Wife—Robert. Hypnotist—Yes, dear. Brush—What do you mean? Wife—I wish you would come here Paint — Well, first we had Calory | And tell baby he's asleep. 1 R Rey | Colidge and now we have Herb Hoo- i viet 1 une ity ) ver. Mrs, Huff—Did you see she Jchnson 5 hy twins? Huff—yes. Mrs. Huff—Don’t you think the boy TM TELLING Sou RIGHT NOW THAT 1 DO NOT INTEND To MAKE GOOD ON ANYTHING “THAT WEVE BEEN “TRICKED INTo — SO NWNHAT ARE YA GONG TO DO ABOUT Mrs. Chlupp—Tommy distresses me 50. He leaves things half done. Mrs. Quiggle—How terrible. Sup-,/is the picture of his father? pose he grows up to be a transatlantic! Huff—I sure do—and the girl is the flyer. | talkie“of her mother. SENERAL THINGS! FIRST TM GOING” STRNGUT To MR AFFEL. HE DOESN’ WANT SOUR KIND IN HIS EMPLOY. First Senator—Is the new Senator When a man’s unhappy, the reason Whozis regular? is usually this: He sees only the Second Senator—Is he regular! Say faults in things he has and only the he agrees with nobody! virtues in things he lacks, WELL ZTAKE MY ADNICE AND Go EASY. YOU'LL BE MORE APT T'GET OUT OF “TROUBLE PLAYING HIM TM HONING THAT) ALONG "THAN BY DEFYING HM — seit AFTER ALL, THE SIGNATURE (5 ON, ul YOU CAN'T SIGH LEASES AND “THEN WALK OUT ON ME! 4E You HADN'T TIED ME UP ITH THAT LEASE, Goofus—I would like to see a dog- | \ COULD WANE RENTED “To ‘wood cane. Clerk—Yes, sir—one with the bark on it? Here's hoping the national bed-time story will soon be changed. We're all sick of listening to “The Great Big Bear and the Teeny-Weeny Bull.” Daily Cross-word Puzzle ACROSS Solution of Yesterday's Puzzle 1. Manufactured &. Plant of the lily family | 9. Englisb author 14. Count over {16. Come in (17. High, pointed las. See baititear IF | . Base [Bb drsrca = (RU [PTE wright ja. children's game 22. Billiard stick 128. Concerning 24. Abate 13. Gaelic 15. International underatand- fA[CTEMMMIETTIEMMSITIO[P) oie or ine ISTETA} {1} \ MOSER UWRF LAY HbHbnes MEY D . Dauber . Obstruction Rained tebe! in 7 3. Limb ima . Adam's con- 4 atm! BUT SAMS OUT SICK, | KITTYS GoT @ COLD AND REDS OUG UP ANOTHER GRAND— MOTHER Te BURY! | THOUGHT ‘You Were Too BUSY FER BALL 126. Government charge for carrying mail 29. Source of light and heat {80. Male offspring (31 Slips sideways 83. Lik 0 . Military assis- . Halts . Convened ae Guz2cem! BALL GAME ALL Tose Her: 2 . Nevertheless : Broke @ bole BE Hee tinge 5% Measuring ine DOWN 2 ° trument : like fabric’ g1. correct» + Pusible opaque eta tree 88. Celtic mascu- 62, Melody seins line name 63. Public convey- 2 Positive pole 29. Watering place ‘ance 3. Compulsion 41. Rather than 64. Exclamation 4. Type. measure 42. Eggs 65. Part of a gar- 5. Pertaining to 44: Greek letter | ment an early - StIMly proper ere the sun theologian 47. Controt rises nde . 6. Resounded 50. For example: . ‘abbr. 161. Lateral boun- (83. Fish eggs ‘4. Color 66. Irritated . “The language of emotion’ 9. German river . Varieties . Mountain tp reece . Foundation . Finis! . Inhabitant of: 70. Meaning & sumix ‘71. Opposing fi . Fish 73. Appended 10. Ds . Egyptian deity 14. Fish sauce il, 2. Sign of the 75. Native metals 12. infinitive . One who man- ages: abbr. RSPAS eS PSR aE WELL, WSS MN Lact Rocker MesBE | OUGHTTA SANE WT BUY SNL--SHWIPS ARE ON TH LOOKOUT WOW ,NARE MORE APY TSEE IT--- WHILE), FL WAIT NOPE lors NOW OR NEVER BOOTS AND HER BUDDIES a | le lt | SOSiIt