The Bismarck Tribune Newspaper, January 23, 1931, Page 12

THE BISMARCK TRIBUNE, FRIDAY, JANUARY 23, 1981 “What's keeping you, girls? The boys are already here.” | NOW YOU TELL ONE —_—— ANOTHER SCOTCH ONE | A Scotchman crossing the ocean proved to be a bad sailor and went to see the captain of the ship to see if he could do anything for seasick- ness. “Have you got a dime?” asked the captain. “Yes,” replied the Scot “Well, hold it between your. teeth during the trip,” the captain advised. trish Times. | BLESSING IN DISGUISE TRAPPED | Chet Johnson in Juage: The cor-| ener had seen many cases like this vas a for- mality. y to set all! ; the evidence in rd. | 5 ae “The note en by the victim! Whipp: I'm going to get a divorce. will be attached to the other data ‘and |My wife hasn't spoken to me for six marked Exhibit A,” said the coroner. |months. d “and I recommend that the jury in| Lasch: Better be careful. You'll ‘never get another wife like that— this case bring a report of death from ne — | Pathfinder. natural causes. “9:31 p. m.—Two hours now. T am! —— thinking of you, dearie. 1 will not! SUCH JUDGMENT! give up hope. | “what became of that clerk you "4:45 p. m—Air getting bad. Oh,/had here?” for a drink of water. | «1 had to fire him. A man came “6:32 p, m.—Have lost all track of | with his bride to buy a book for read- what day it is. Can hardly breathe. ing on his honeymoon and the stupid I am holding on with my left. hand tant offered him “Travels With Think it is paralyzed. Hear tapping|a Donkey.’”—Das Kleine Witzblatt on the door. | Leipzig. "8:34 p. m.—Have called and crlled, | but no one seems to hear. It’s hell toj QUALIFIED fo out like this. Sometimes I seem! Prospective Employer: What we to hear voices. Guess it is just de-|want is a night watchman who will lirium, | watch, alert and ready, for the slight- “11:34 p. m.—My watch has stop-jest noise .of indication of burglars. ped. The air is terrible. Guess Somebody who can sleep with one eye end is near. all. Don't{and both ears open and is not afraid blame anybody. My cligence jto tackle anything. 4s responsible, I knew all about tele-| Applicant: I see sir. phone booths when I came into this | wife around.—Tit-Bits. one.” I'll send my — A Westinghouse scientist says one If you don't despise a cripple who|noise can be used to silence another. can't jump as far as you can, why|'The little bell on the cash register. despise # crippled intellect that isn't |for instance, stops the sound of as lively ours. jmoaning. Daily Cross-word Puzzle | ACROSS Solution of Yesterday's Puzzle 11. Monkey 1. Enliven 12. Denial & piety vA Properties centory dances c 18. Keducea In moaiere rank 16, Fatt, 7 |. Female sand> iper an fairy Departed Seu pymph aga’ v Symbol for tel- tortum 41. Parcel ot ground 43. Sait of nitrile acid 25, Aeriform tata 26. Minute particle fs. Reyuire: 29. Heclesiasticas court . Wearles Seoteh river or cliffs esters 56. Shooting stars 4%. Selence of Vessel for beauty king ® bev. 4% Vil: suttx 60. Detest 61. Femiuine name 63. Like 64. River tn New Ke 46. Uneunny 4%. Metric land PAGE OF COMIC STRIPS AND In Conferenc: By Cowan sale MOU CAN HARDLY KEEP YOUR meusores 40, Delizhtfas re- gone 51. Old 6 European ned Jersey 4s. 7. Prepared tor t-colored piiibole pablication 2. Veranda Bound 8. Procession 4, Large unite Mormars 9% Mine ap- 65. Exadation now proaches from an infee- 1. Flatter ser- 10. Devise for rotheniom tion vilely gripping 47. At home FEATURES) =: shia hls cea i HAW! HAW! HAW!’ UAND WHEN You GET REASY ‘To MAKE THAT REQUEST= TO SAVE US BOTH FROM A LoT OF EMBARRASMENT - | ADVISE YOU Yo MAKE Ir OVER TNE TELEPHONE} AND NANG THE RECEIVER UP BEFORE You THE GUMPS—RIGHT IS RIGHT NOW LISTEN TO ME ANDY @ I'VE MAD VERY NITTYLE MONEY FOR CLOTHES FOR A LONG TIME = BUT SOME DAY $OON- I'M GOING To GET MY COURAGE UP= AND I'M GOING TO MAKE A LITTLE REQUESY OF You THAT WILL RAISE YOUR’ HAT RIGNT OFF YOUR HEAD— 1 SHOULD MIHINK YOU'D GET SICK OF EVEN THINKING ABOUT CLOTHES = LOOK AT THESE WONDERFUL BARGAINS = VE NEVER SEEN THINGS SO CHEAP IN ALL MY LIFE = } COULD GO DOWN AND SPEND A WHOLE WEEK IN EACH STORE — QUST LOOKING AROUND = THE EVENING WHEN THEN DROPPED IN, ON US. ANDO WE OUGHT TO RETURN THEIR CALL. I WANGNT SEEN FRECKLES FOR A COUPLE DAYS....\NONDER. WHAT HE'S DOINe F HIS MOTHER TOLD ME WE AN' TAG WERE OUT IN THE BARN... Yessir, Linoy!! youre : Sn). > S S f y ! OY GOING To LIKE HIS... BESIDES, “A SS eel ereapeonr v Berrie A ovice etal {DS WANNA KILL YouRSELvES: FoR YourseLe,Youre * Ler ME HAE A Ripe, GOING To GIVE US eo... HEY! KIDS A LOT OF : FON. MES, We FEEL V/AND WE THAT BOTH OF THEM ARE TAKING THIS 7 MES, T AGREE. CTHER CLANS// T THINK IT'S & FOR GLAOWS,] BIG MISTAKE FOR A GIRL, AS cty |] & THING- Like THe WAS HERE AND We Were Ue VERY Lave-We DION’ T Go To BED UNTIL, NING 2 Ofctock! MLL BET YOU WERE AT ) NoPE! | GEN’ALLY Go TOBED WITH “WH CHICKENS — BUT LAST NIGHT WAS AN ExX— CEPTION | GOSH , AR. KAWNHUSK A LOOK ' MEH SAM | EEEL LIKE Like You'd GEEN OUT ALL NIGHT!) { LOOK ALL TUCKERED eres SUS SU SUK! || PONE NIGHT GUNS Ie e& wee! - . : PEEPERS OPEN — Vv WON'T HURT Sa ONCE IN im: