The evening world. Newspaper, July 6, 1922, Page 28

pS ca Vacation time is here And father wants to go To some swell beach where 1 ens swim But mother tells him no She doesn’t like the beach idea Because of flirty Pa And she’s suggesting that they tr The woods of Canada Right there appears another snag Pa says the woods won't do “Th we'll never take, says he And father means it too. He's read about those Injun guides Who through the forests roam A deadlock's on and so | g They'll stay right here at home Observations. If you want something to think about try pondering over that oft printed line, “The taken to Bellevue fondling wa A Kansas City woman swallowed @ package of thirty needles yester day, At last reports her life wa hanging by a thread. When Mrs. Polly Osterholtz of Wellsville found a safe cracker in her usband’s bakery she called the police. Evidently Polly didn't want a cracker. ’ THELMA THE VAMP. It was the opening night of\the play and Thelma was the star. “To-night, my beauty,” said Benjamin Hur, the great actor, will find fame body will be at your feet.” Thelma did not think that very rt. The name of the play und every ou Good Evening! By BIDE DUDLEY | FUMIO MUA aS little home in Kitchikik, There | is a mother old and gray; a girl at the dinner table, It 1s Thelma “Yes, mother. I am home to stay awhile, Ple give me inother pork chop. A man steps in. He is Benja- min Hur “T love you,” he says to the s “The Seven Chiropodis' &he gave Hur one look. “Oh, grunt!” she snapped. ‘The curtain went up at last. Thelma sat in the office of the seven cairopodists. One of her toes needed fixing, but the author had forgotten to designate which toe. It brought an awkward pause. The author was A. Chittelsey Hopp and he was in the wings. Seeing the cause of the stage wait, he whispered: “Left great toe!” Unfortunately Thelma iad re- moved the right shoe, so she used dramatic license and put in a line, “Tis not the toe you see, dear chiropodist,” she said. “ 'Tis the one in the shoe.” , With that she left the stage and summoned Hopp. “You have ruined tais play,” she said. “Whaddye care?” retorted Hopp. “Let's go out and get an ice cream soda.” * ‘A year passes. We now see a RD from Fortune Gallo, who is at present in Rome, Infi- cates that an Italian theatre may, be established in New York. Mr. Gallo hints that the institution will be generously subsidized and supported, to a great extent, by the italian Government. Tho Carlo Opera impressario has convinced fh authorities in Rome that, with more than a million Italians living in Now York and its suburbs, a theatre de- voted to Italian dramas and comedies would be indeed welcome, CHEVALIER HERE. Maurice Chevalier, the French mu sical comedy star who has just fin- ished a run of two years in Paris in “Dede,” a production which Charles Dillingham has arranged to bring to America, is spending a brief tion in New York. He will go bacs to France in a few weeks and begin vaca another run in ‘Dede.’ When that piece opens here M. Chevalier will be in the cast HOT AIRITES TO MEET. The Hot Air Club, composed of el gentlemen who m once In a and swap stories and flasks, twenty-second annual N. J., on is Presi- etary, its at Pleasure Bay, Peter J. Carey James Shesgreen, Albert J. Simmons, the committee in charge vangemeats for the blowout is made up of D. W. Haynes, Fred Meek and D. Frank Dodge. One of the courses will be sandwiches smeared with ible ant butt by edge, who has an ant farm up in Westchester County. GOSSIP. Marjorie Rambeau has declined an offer to play in South America, Carol Flower, a New Orleans s0- ciety girl, bas been given a dancing role in “Good Morning, Dearie.” “@huffle Along” will close on July On July 31 it will begin a run at the Selwyn Theatre, Boston F. Ziegfeld jr. is now in Paris, At a musical show there he saw in the audience Mae Murray, Justine Jobn- etom, Ruby de Remgr and Martha 22. About Plays little girl from Kitcaikik He takes her in his arms, pid has triumphed over Art (The End.) Cu- BY WAY OF DIVERSION, When mother frowns and says “Because!” no matter how dad hems and haws, or paces up and down the floor, it does no good to argue more. The truth may be the other way but there is nothing else to say. Dad just resorts to sneers and grins, for mother's through and mother He'll hunt up sister Sue and state his case most He may be right, but we say: “Pop, you'd better let the matter drop.” So Dad goes out and slams the door, whjch always means he's pretty sore. Then to himself he jaws and jaws, when mother merely says: “Because!” Dad can't oppose her argu- ment. His stand is never worth accent. While mother keeps quite calm and bool he'll call her silly and a fool. She doesn't seem to care a rap how hard may be Dad's verbal slap. No, condem- nation never awes my mother when she says, “Because.” | guess all women are the same. When their ideas prove weak or lame they say, “Because!” and then they're through. least, Dad says Says he, wins. or me forcefully. At hat's what they do. “It's one of women's laws that when one merely says ‘Because,’ your argument is on the shelf. You might as well go kick yourself.” What's Up, D’ye S’pose? Every morning about 5 o'clock there floats into the bedroom of the writer of this column a peculiar smell. It is hard to describe, but it makes us think of sour mash, what- ever that may be. It comes up from the court, stays only a few minutes and then leaves. We're inclined to believe that Mr. Volstead, away back, is the cause of the Wsit of this odor and yet none of our neighbors has in- vited us to liquor up. Can any read- er explain this smell? We're puz- zled. The Glad Hand. Flner_ He and is de Pantagraph, nd has a new automobile hted with it.—Kismet (0.) AND NOW PERMIT US To suggest that nobody in this part of the country can call this a hard world—after all the rain we've had. and Players Mansfield, all formerly of his stage forces. The Threshold Players will go to Sing Sing Sunday and present three one-act plays for the entertainment new musical revue, will begin an engage- ment at Winter Garden to-night. It has a large cast of well known people, T. Daniel Frawley is recruiting a theatrical company to go to the Orient and play. Adele Blood has signed up for the trip. The troupe will open in Honolulu In August. Jean Havez has made so much money writing film stories that he has decided to retire and go to France to live. It was Jean, you know, who wrote the song, “Everybody Works but Father Musty Miller and his wife, Elsa Ryan, will sail for Europe on July 12. In makin ut his application for a Passport Musty said he was not old at all, when we have tt from one of lis close friends he yoted for Tilden, John E. Hogarty has a stock com- pany in Bethlehem, Pa, and has a card at a b there where Charles Schwab dines, Ever y day or so John bows to Charley A THOUGHT FOR TO-DAY. Jim Martineau of Sullivan County, was packing apples the other day when a goat knocked over ten barrels with its head, Jim immediately called the goat an apple butter, FOOLISHME? A girl who was terribly skinny. The man she addressed Then kissed her with zest. ginny, PUT IT IN THE ACT. “Is your duugt pianist making threa but the h B.D. prmeergeo po DO YOU MEAN “To STAND “THERE AND! TeLt ME You LeY “THAT MAN GET AWAY WITH THE CAR WITHOUT PAYING FoR ITP HAVEN'T You Gor “The SENSE YOU WERE» BORN WITH? Tl Never Kick ABOUT TH WIFES CooKINn’ AFTER ait WEY UNCLE EZRA Wike YO “ELD OS FIX OvuR OTTY MOBILE KATINKA KEEP Him FR'm STOP! PAYMENT ON “TH CHECK ? DAT AM WICHICKEN Zoop San! maemo The Evening World Comics WELL, How Coud T {= ARE YOU GOING “To DO ANYTHING ABouT IT ? You Roam AROUND Like. A CHICKEN WITH IT'S HEAD ore! “Hese SUMMER RESORT HOTELS “THINK “He CAN HAND A GUY ANYTHIN' AN’ GET AWAY WITH (T — WHERES “H’ MANAGER #! ALL OVER Dier AND GREASE 1992 (N. ¥. Eve. Werld) You won't MARRY Me TL 1 GET A JOB, So Tuc) DECIDED To BE A CHAUFFEUR. I BORROWED THIS CAR AND GOT A Book OF INSTRUCTIONS ON "HOW To DRIVE” COME ALONG AND READ IT OFF AFTER YoU GET HER IN FIRST SPEED - RELEASE YOUR CLUTCH AND PUT HER INTo “SECOND” THEN AFTER ROLLING A Cy) Few YARDS THRow HER fe { INTO THIRD Dy |i), V5 WHAT'CL T DO ROUNDING A SHARP TuRN ? AW, Quit RAZZING ME - (mM Teyin' —WHY I DONT EVEN KNow WeT= a WHETHER (T WAS CHICKEN SOUP"oR “CLAM CHOWDER ! FEED HER LESS GAS PUT YoUR FOOT ON THe BRAKE THEN ADVANCE THE SPARK, STEP ON THE GAS /TiLe YOU REACH A SPEED OF 40 MILES AN HOUR CouLDNT You TELL BY THe A A Gleam of Sunshine! my LAWYER waste ? ttt “THEN. WHAT DIFFERENCE ° Does (T MaKe § FIXIN’ YOUR OTTY MOBILE Now 1 SEE THe ERROR — 1 TURNED Two PAGES: AT ONCE BY MISTAKE ! PEoPLe ARE So nUMB. THey THINK CuT GLAss cones In PIECES Gus heavy, has had a run of tough luck. At least, he says it's tough, Ran into Gus yesterday (but that’s not the hard luck) and he was be- moaning the fact that he had been offered a moaned. shade I get a chanco to go to the tropics. Along about the first of Janu- ary I'll be ordered to the North Pole and I suppose, ended in this country, I'll Lave to go to Montreal." “Hey, gimme a kiss," satd Miss Mine But, to tell you the truth, he was 4 finished neighbors are ceived a S Seneca creenings By DON ALLE Yes, HARD LUCK! Seyfferyitz, motion picture Dick E covered doesn't have that picture job to go to the tropics and appear in many red-hot] yesterday, wiley tried his treatment. “That's always the way," he struments “Here, when its 110 in the when Prohibition is BEAUTY MAKES GOop, ‘She made good and yesterday re- nice contract from Vignola for another big picture. sometimes it that way—even in real life. YOUTH RESTORER. rthelmess says he has dis- man who can knock a quar- ter century off a man’s life and he to use The man is a wonder,” said Dick “I know because I have he used were a pair of shears and a razor. the part of a father in the first part of the picture and then had to jump right In and play my own son. my barber did the youth restoration in less time than it takes to tell it.” Robert DOES happen tional says it is. When any glands—at ence Dane, arm. And the only in- You see, I playeg | ment” So in disguise. Production is once again in full blast among big producers.” All sounds mighty nice and we for one hope it is as rosy as First Na- CONSTANCE HAS PLAY. Constance marching home from Europe late next month it is believed she will have the manuscript of a new play by Clem- author of Divorcement,” all tucked under her Binney Mrs. Dane, having seen Miss Binney, in the star role of “A Bill of Divorce- which 1s London, at once came to the conclu- sion that she would write a play for the photoplay star and later turn the speaky Into a movie. And so, when September is with us, we may read in the electric lights somewhere in the Snoring Forties: being comes “A Bill taken first, second and third prize at a kennel club show. The ribbons were red, white and blue—which accounts for the patriotic tinge to the yarn. CRIME WAVE. On the topic of crime the latest issue of Aesop's Film Fables has this to say: “Pickpockets’ times picked by pickpockets pockets are some- f . “Many a hick can lick a slick, “mis better to ramble than gamble. “He who tries to feed the kitty will in|!ose his dough in a big city. “A little trickery now and then Is practised by the best o’ men. “Ie you purloin a little dime you're flirting with a greater crime. of a feather hock to- there you are! FIRST NATIONAL DOPB. “Constance Binney in Clemence ev It isn't very often it happens,| Things are looking up in the mov-|Dane's Latest Play"—— RIGHT ISN'T LEFT. but in the case of Mac les, according to Associated First] But, shucks! They didn’t even tell] epjmely Topics Films’ latest release In other words the National, which, in an announcement |U® the name of itt hurls this one at you: Beauty Contest has broadcast yesterday, states: Team Manager (to raw recrult)— good in the movies—and in record he motion picture industry has CHARLIE, HE'S PROUD. Go out and play right field! time, too. begun to disvipline itself and is at| “Alias Julius Caesar,” who in real{ R. R.—I never played on these Here's how it happened. Miss} the beginning of a new era of doing|life is none other than Charlie Ray,|srounds; which 1S right field? Terry won a beauty contest in De-] things by the business yardstick. is right proud these days. And jt eet troit and right away the movie bug Business prospects tor the fall{isn’t because his praise agent tells STATIC. ulpped her good and hard and winter, for exhibitor, producer |him he has made “the great American] In a huge sign in Times Square And so she came to New York and, [and distributer, are brighter than they |Picture,” either, which advertises “In the Name of the contrary to the proverbial plot of such | were before the depression It's because Whiskers, Charlie's] Law,” a police film, there is a sen- stories, secured a job with Marion] “The long continued lull in produc-| wire-haired fox terrier, proved his|tence which says something about Davies almost at once? how over, bas proved @ blessing patriotism recently by wianing a! pips and Pickpockets.”” Seems funny me that any one who has a big police yearn doesn't know that dips and pickpockets mean the same! Vera Gordon announced yesterday that she would positively return to the speakies in the fall, Grace Darmond is the featured player in Warner Brothers’ “A Dan- gerous Adventure.” Wallace Worsley, “Brass, who will direct * is conferring with the au- thor of the novel in regard to the filmization. Mary Alden, at present reen mothering” Dick Barthelmess, says she had been a mother to so many Screen stars that she feels like the matron of an orphan asylum. Viola Dana is the champion knitter of Hollywood, Ben Turpin is the runner-up. Laurette Taylor has started actual screening of “Peg 0! Hear Edward Connelly, character man, has been in every picture Rex Ingram has made for that concern and has never been late yet. Time was when Harold Lloyd was turning out one comedy a w Now it takes six months to complete one. The only difference is that now they the My the Metro star are comedies. For the first time in his career, Tony, the famous Tom Mix horse, will be ridden by some one else in picture. This event will take place in “Just Tony.” William Farnum is hiding behind a barrage of chin chinchilla for his nex! picture. He is in the Adirondacks and the Farnum foli@ze blends perfectly with the mountain herbage, Vincent Coleman, man, {3 learning to play the saxo- Phone. We don't care, either—but think of his poor neighbors! Loulse Backus Seger, widely known character woman of both the and the talkies, is in the cas Bondboy,” the film that has nothing whatsoever to do with tle hold-up of a Wall Street messenger. Richard Walton Tully, on “Omar, the Tentmake most of the joy out of life by tellin, us that Persian harems were not what we thought they were at all. Conway Tearle has signed for tw. pictures for Selznick, Mabel Normand is scheduled to re. turn from Europe by Aug. 15 to star a new picture for,Mack Sennett, ‘The shooting of ‘Day Dreams" ta: popular leading been somewhat of a nightmare t Buster Keaton A Yale professor has just writte Joe Schenck praising Smilin’ Through.” ‘That makes it unanimous. Mary O'Hara is preparing the scree! version of ‘Peg o' My Heart" fo Metro, Playgoers Pictures yesterday nounced two releases for July, 'T will be “The Woman Who GC Rack” and “Her Majesty.” we didn't even hnow thay were in Jail, es