The evening world. Newspaper, March 29, 1921, Page 21

D. H. Lawrence, Modernist, Asks‘and Is Answered WHY’ ARE THERE OLD MAIDS? Novelist Who Specializes in Emotional Problems Analyzes Heartaches of Unmarried Woman of 26—Miss Dean Answers His Question by x “There Are No Old Maids.” of the younger generation of tional problems, ¥s you may guess “Women in Love,” “Sons and Lovers” and, latest of then, “The Lost Girl.” It ts In thie ook that Mr. Lawrence discovers old maids—or, as he pic- turesquely terms them, “Dead Sea fruit of odd women, unmarried, un- marriageable women.” . “Why is it,” he demands, “that every tradesman, every schoolmaster, every bank manager and every clergyman produces one, two, three or more old makis? Do these citi- zens give birth to more girls than boys? Or do the men assiduously climb up or down, in marriage, thus leaving their true partners stranded? Or are the women very squeamish in their choice of husbands?" One of these Dead Sea fruits, named Alvina, is Mr. Lawrence's heroine. It is at the advanced age of twenty-six that Alvina first feels that the curse has come upon her. “For the fear of being an old maid,” ehivers Mr. Lawrence, “was really gaining on Alyina. There was a terrible sombre futility—nothing- ness, She was twenty-six years old. Her life was utterly barren. She was shabby and penniless, a mere house- hold drudge. She was looking taded and worn. Panic, the terrible and deadly panic which overcomes 80 many unmarried women at about the re of thirty, was beginning to over- edme her. A few y later, when her fat died, and stil Alvina had not n ried, she was “poor Alvina” to her littie town. “Pity some nice young man doesn’t turn up and marry her,” everybody said. “I don’t know, doesn't seem to hook 01 does she? ® * © She'd snup at anybody now o.8 a tidy though. She's not much chance of oft. How old do you reckon s Must be well over thirty. * * * Well, she looks ft. § maid. 1 wonder i It’s funny. Oh, she was too high and y before, and now It's too late. y wants her.” en Atyira married eventually. But shades of the prison house! That there should exist to-day—ev tween the cayers of a book—any woman who would let herself be hyp- notized by this sort of chattert The answer to Mr. Lawrence's ques- tion, “Why are there old _maids?"—is simple. Old maids are NOT—they do not exist—at least, in an enlightened Ameri community You remember the old humorous distinction between an “old maid” and a “spinster”? “An old maid is a lady who has never had the chance to change her condition; a spinster liad the chance and refused it." cording to that definition, every un- married woman, nowadays, is a spin- ster, even though the term itself b almost as obsolete as “bachélor girl The point is simply this!’ A genera- tion ago it was the general, more or less jocular assumption that if a woman did not marry, the reason must be because no man wanted her. To-day, the unniarried woman is just 9 generally assumed to be so he- jause she has found no man whom she wanted—and the joke is on the men of her circle! “Did you,” I asked an unmarried friend, a charming woman in the ear- ly thirties, “look faded and worn at twenty-six? Was the fear of being an old maid gaining on you? And two years ago, on your thirtieth birth- day, were you overcome with terrible and deadly panic “Nothing doing!" she Jaughed. “At twenty-five I was earning so much money that I dreased better and looked bester than ever before in my life. By Marguerite Dean, Copyright, 1921, by the Press Publishing Co (The New York Rventng World.) be ins, HY are there old maids? pAY/ A man puts the question, D. H. Lawrence, one of the cleverest British novelists, a specialist in emo- even from the titles of his books— HEROINE IN ROMANCE OF AN ODD DIVORCE THAT “DIDN'T TAKE” YEAR AND A HALF ago Mrs. Harriet A. Vance, finding life unbearable in Guam, left her husband, Lieut. Dean H, Vance, U. §. N., and their two children and returned to San Francisco. Believing she had lost her love for him, Lieut. Vance secretly obtained a divorce, but continued to send her $100 a month and did not tell her of the decree. Three months ago he left Guam and started for San Francisco. Hearing nothing from her husband for a long time, Mrs. Vance filed suit for divorce this week. Two hours after she filed the papers he arrived; they met; they kissed—and they remarried “to make sure.” My chief fear was that the mot! would get into my fur coat. Sine at thirty, | was trying to decide be- tween marrying a man who sells ploughs and a man who selis bonds— I finally refused both and have been going to the vheatre with them, alter- nate weeks, ever since—I couldn't be called panic-stricken over the pros- pect of my unmated state, Perhaps they do these things differently in England, with its millions of surplus n that the woman ra wedding ring willow—would be voted t wou iaive!" In America, the old maid went out when the feminine pay-envelope came in. In “The Li Girl"—which is published in this country by Thomas Seltzer—she heroine, alas, has not learned this economic fact. She seems to be even more scared of a job than of “withering toward old- maiddom: “Work!—a job! She rebelled with all her backbone against the word job. Even the substitutes, employ- ment or work, were detestable, un- bearable. Emphatically, she did not want to work for a wage. It was too humiliating! Any woman who honestly cherishes such silly, snobbish ideas should ‘be sentenced to the hamiliatmg fate of the one-time old maid—the eating of her brother's bread, the wearing of her sister-in-law's old clothes, the enduring of all the mean tasks, snubs and jokes thrust upon her from thirty to seventy. In New York there are no old maids, in the sense of despised emo- tional left-overs, scraps relegated by the male to Nature's rag-bag. There is the unmarried woman with her own work, her own money, her own home, her own pleasures, her own friends, She has given no hostages to fortune. She is the woman—I al- most said the ONLY woman—who is the master of her fate, the captain of her soul. Woodward Children, Aged 8 and 10, In Tests Show ‘nation to West Point and was the ‘youngest cadet ever admitted. On }5oth sides of the family the two 4 od sane we SORRAES con EDC, OSU WARD Oe eawene aie Cremeanene BS, genius sometimes does run in ¥Y families. For instance, here's eight-year-old Nancy and ten- year-old Edwin Woodward, who ‘both just passed “intelligence” tests that would have left many an aduit help- Jessly floundering. They are the chil- @ren of Gen, and Mrs. Woodward ot Fhushing, L. 1L, and Gep. Wood- ward when he was a mere stripling of gixteen passed the entrance examl- “Adult Intelligence.” Woodward youngsters count .among uncles and other relatives many an example of brilliant achievement, Wight-year-old Nancy recently made the phenomenal record of 188 inteili- gence quotient on the Stanford 1e- vision of the Binet intelligence tests, which perhaps not one child in 100,000 will reach, She has a vocabulary of over 10,000 words, nearly that of the average adult, and passed several of the “superior adult” tests, Ten-year-old Edwin showed to have mental age of seventeen years and but in New York Mr, Law-, to that of THE EVIL Can You Beat It! ‘s ‘ 1 WANT A QULET HOUSE WITH ALL No. GHICKENS OF THE CITY ON A MAIN ROAD WHERE AUTOS ARE PROHIBITED | HATE NOISE AND DUST COUNTRY THE CONFORTS NEARBY TO WAKE NE AT DAYLIGHT FOR THE MAt FAR (N THE COUNTRY BUT NEAR AN EXPRESS STATION. NEAR A NOWE HOUSE D lhG WORLD, TUZSDAY, MARCH jew York Evenings Wortd,) PLENTY OF SHADE But NO TREES | HATE THE CHATTER OF BIRDS AT BAY BREAK No BARKING BOGS AROUND TO GET ON MY NERVES. No DEW | HATE DAN PNESS No FLIES, No NOSQUITOES CHEAP RENT OF COURSE a, 1921. Gea te By Maurice Ket HAVE WE A HOUSE IN HEAVEN To RENT ? IS Our English Degenerating? - | ““NO,”’ Author of ‘‘American English” Insists—and Proves It | “‘We Have No Dialects— Great Britain Has Sev- eral,” Gilbert M. Tucker Points Out in Assailing Dictum of London Sat- urday Review. Quotes Diction of English Workingman and Chal- lenges Critical Cousins to Find Anything Like It in America. By Roger Batchelder. Copyright, 1921, ty the Prom Publishing Oo, (The New York Preuing World) §S our English degenerating? ‘The traveller from the land where the “King’s English” is a tradition might wel reply affrma- tively and with righteous horror on reading that in Cook County, Ulnois (slang for Chicago), “it 1s me” is grammatically acceptable, or on hear- ing, between 14th Street and the Grand Central, the now classic Har- lemism, “Dearie, was yer ever to Coney?” But is it really? “No!” cries Gilbert M. ‘Tucker, author of “American — Enylist (Knoop), probably one of th stanchest literary cudgels ever ralaed against the dictum of the London Saturday Review, that accepted ar- biter of what is proper or not proper in the King’s or any other variety of English. We have no dialects, either geo- graphical or social,” declares Mr. Tucker in bringing foxth his case, “whereas there are any number ot them in Great Britain, Our pro- nunciation, while sometimes regret- tably harsh, ls much clearer and more systematic than that of our transatlantic cousins; our spelling, in every case where there is well- established difference, is to be pre- ferred to that of Bugland on any pos- sible basis of comparison, and the mother tongue euffers far less in this country than abroad in freakish changes of fashion, whether in gard to vocabulary itself or the nificance attached to words.” In drawing comparison, asserts Mr, Tucker, it should be between the speech of the same class in the two countries, or else between fair aver- ages. “If the talk of street loafers in American cities and the verbal ‘pe- cullarities that one may find in the outlying regions of Texas are to be counted as characteristic of Ameri- can speech, we must ralso take just as careful account in striking ‘the balance of the lingo of the slums of London, Edinburgh and Cork, and of the jargon of the most unpro- greasive counties of the three king- doms. To compare the conversation of a London drawing-room with the talk that you might hear in a road- house in Arkansas is manifestly un- profitable.” Mr, Tucker now proceeds to show that our critical cousins might well pluck the mote from their own eye, so to speak, by quoting from both popular and presumably classic Eng- lish literature of the day. “These sort of people,” ‘T have laid awake upon it,” “He eat his toast”—such errors, if an American lexicographer were caught using them, would fur- nish “what a text for a dissertation on the process of depraving our mother tongue which is advancing with such alarming rapidity in th: United States.” Speaking of diction, he quotes an English workingman ‘on a steamer: “Ah know thut ah bahy ah varre bahd ahxunt,” and challenges, “Find anything lke that in the United States if you can.” Moreover, he can see no reason why @ sick person should not be “nick,” why he must always be “ill” unle: he is nauseated, This “American ism,” can be found in the St. James Bible, where persons are “sick” sixty times, also in Shakespeare, where the “Americanism” occurs 188 times, In reviewing ten treatises on the English language which point out our flagrant derelictions in speech, Mr. Tucker quotes over 1,100 ‘tAmerican- Isms” which can be found on close examination to be of foreign origin. Many of them were in use !n England before America was even heard of, “Rack out” is found {n Scott, while even the term “baseball” was used in 1828. “Beau.” in the sense of a lover, appears in Goldsmith; “billy,” a club, oceurred in the London Times in 1865; Horace Walpole spoke of a “bruiser” in 1744, and even the “cala- hoose” is a relic of 1792. Rut the Messrs, Fowler's “The Queen's Eng lish” exhorts the reader to “make a very firm stand” against throe Amer fean verbs that illustrate the “bar- baric taste’ that prevaila in the United States, “These dreadful American Inven- tions,” stys Mr, Tucker, “are Dictionary, 1742, and transpire, for which Murray gi string of © tions in date from 597 to 1908. it really does appear, as some writer has expressed it, that when an Eng- lishman dislikes a word he is very likely to call it an Americanism and uhink that settles it.” In conclusion, Mr, ‘Tucker gives a Hist of true Americanisms, the origin and meaning of which are misunder- stood by overzealous English critics. On page 325 he actually smiles when he quotes the English definition of “Comstockism” as “opposition to the nude in art;” he derides the stat ment that & “dime museum" is “common show from New York, whi bas a passion for monstrosity dis- plays called ‘Dime Museums,’ the dime being the eighth of a dollar and at the announcement, “On Ice, Dead; from placing body on icc to aid in faking it,” Mr. Tucker merely asks What sort of process is faking a body?" ‘There's another angle to it, Friend Englishman, Straight goods, there is, it we do tell the world, Eh, wot, ole topper? COOKING HELPS whites and ¢ream are necessarily stale they do not whip stift. an egg is too fresh J& will not beat very stiff and cream re- fuses to whip well unless it is, at least, thirty-six hours old. Both eggs and be very cold to whip properly. ‘Phe addition of a slight pinch cream should process of stiffening. If milk happens to be scarce when making creamed oysters liquor from It will be @ change and you may like the flavor better than when milk is used. sliced, with hot baking powder The family will pro- combination deli- Add a pinch of soda to the berry pie before putting on the upper crust and with chopped onion and served bed of lettuce makes an appetizing dish AXIMS or M * BY MARGUERITE MOOERS MARSHALL ¢ ODERN MAID Copyright, 1981, by the Press Publishing Co. (The New York Brening World), HE life of a beautiful woman is a perpetual whispering galtery; her lovers whisper to her and her friends whisper about her. The modern girl's middle name may be Jezebel, but at least she doesn't linger on purpose in the shadowy vestibule when he says good night—and then moan, heartbroken- ly, “Oh, Algernon, how could you!” Before marriage it is man who brags about his love affairs; after marriage it is woman who fondly recalls how many men used to be “Just crazy” about her. One advantage of life in the “great, friendless city” of New York is that it is SO big that one can lose one's friends whenever one is so in- clined. , Tt is only a man Whose omniscience knows just how long his eggs bolled, even though during the operation he was shaving in the bathroom, while his wife stood over the gas range and timed them with her wrist watch, In the spring a young man’s fancy Mghtly turns to thoughts of love— and takes a right-about turn after he has read the detafls of the spring divorce suits. It 1s so much easier to Itve with a selfish person than with one who is celf-sactificing—and knows ft. The husband whose wife goe# through bis pockets thoroughly understands the principle of an in come tax collected at the source, A marriage for love may be a leap in the dark, but a marriage of con- venience is a deliberate choice of the broad path that leadeth to de- struction. TAR JARPR FAMILY Copyright, 1021, by the Prem Publishing Co. (The New York Evening Worl@). ' ness,” said Mrs. Jarr, “but I saw you coming up the street with that man Billops. If you'll take my advice—but never mind.” “What have you got against old Bill Billops? He's a nice, decent chap, don't you think?” Mr. Jarr in- quired, “Oh, if you are #0 satisfied with him I'm sure I will be,” sald Mrs, Jarr, “put you are always taking up with that sort of people and get so enthusi- astic over them, only to find out they are simply using you.” “Well, I wouldn't go 90 far as to say 66 s F course it's none of my busi- that old Bill Biflops ts working me,” replied Mr. Jarr, “why, on the con- trary”— “Oh, make excuses for people of that sort!” Mrs Jarr interrupted, “but you never will take my advice until it 1s too late and what is the consequence?" “Well, what is the consequence? asked Mr Jart “You will find out when 1! Is all too late," replied Mrs. Jarr vaguely. “But [ should not dare even then venture to say ‘1 warned you, and told you over and over again to have no busi- ness dealings with that man Bill- ops!’ “T'm not going to have any business dealings with Billops,” Mr, Jarr be- gan, when Mrs, Jarr broke in again. “[ hope you are not going td have social relations with him!” she said. “I suppose he wants you to have me take up that impossible wife of his and get her in my clubs and take her to all the affairs I go to and intro- duce her to Mrs, Stryver and Clara Mudridge-Smith”— “When Billops makes up his mind to break into society he will do it as & burglar,” interjected Mr. Jarr, “so don’t Worry.” “Well, please don’t lend him money, if that's what he's after,” said Mrs. Jarr. "You'll lend money to any- body who comes along who tells you a hatd luck story, That's why I'am always worried if you have any money.” “Don't worry, then,” remarked Mr. Jarr wearily. “I promise you I won't lend Billops a cent.” “Ho's up to something, I know that,"" Mrs. Jarr persisted, “I could see him talking to you as I looked out of the window and he was two sweet to be wholesome, too kind to be genuine; he was slapping you on the back.” “Yes, I was talking to him about a WILL MOTHER GET'EM ON STRAIGHT? * INTRODUCING BATTLING TARZAN, ‘THE ONE WITH cN@Y THE BLACK AND i Bie €v By Will B, Johnstone. Coprrigtt, 1921, by the Prem Publishing Co, (The Now York Fvecing Wortd) ‘cc H, my dear, they are wearing artificial! eyelashes this sea- son.” Sounds ailly, but it's a fact, Nestle, the inventor of the Permanent Wave, has perfected a Permanent Eyelash. It your eyelids resemble a Mexican which was used in England tn 1678; hairless dog you can buy a set of antagonize, which ts defined in Bafley’s Nestolashes as a beauty ald tor A a KON : “Oh, BileAte My Eusloihes on Straight?” FATHER GETS SOME TAKE OFF THOSE HAI_AT FALSE Eve casnes! PISCovent? EYES wilt BE MORE DANGEROUS THAN EVER nis hirsute adornment is described .8 “not only useful for the man or woman on the stage, but actually a of huirwork s0 fine as to,be the woman in In other words, the de- ception is so perfect a girl can per- inspect the that “flashes beneath dreamy and never bat an artificial eyelashes cam be pur- THEY Wie BE USEO ON THE STAGE chased in any color—red ones for vamps, green ones for St, Patrick's Day, red, white and blue for Fourth of July But remember, when you go to the counter for a yard of fringe to match your eyes, be sure that the saleslady isn't color blind. And if you happen to find a bushy looking caterptilar in your soup, it will only mean that the maid hasn't learned the art of keep- ing her new eyelashes on in a hot kitchen. Among the brilliant Ameriean women who make $60,000 a year or more is Katharine Hilliker, who is probably the leader of her profession —"film doctors.” She takes 50,000 to 100,000 feet of film and picks out the 6,000 feet of story from the mass. For merely titling one reel of film she gets $150. little scheme I had to make a tidy bit of money # I could only finance " Mr, Jarr explained. “Then he asked me how much I needed, and when I told him he slapped me on the back and said he'd be glad to lend the amount to me and I could pay him when I made a profit out of the proposition I had in mind.” “But can you trust the man?" asked Mrs., Jarr suspiciously, “Cam you trust him?" “Trust him how? Mr. Jarr in- quired. ‘He's trusting me.” “Yes, I know, but there is some- thing suspicious about those friendly people who trust others too much. Mr. Stryver says they always make him suspicious—they never have half the money, Mr. Stryver says, that people think they have.” “I'll keep it in mind the wn next time Billops ts overkindly in helping me out,” remarked Mr, Jarr gravely. “Well, Tam glad you look at it sen- sibly. Be careful of strangers. One never knows what they will do,” eaid Mrs. Jarr, Someeeeloeallpeeorneelit BEAUTY HEALT BY DR CHARLOTT£ C.wesT x wal, by P P Courtine New Yor Mraieg Wartl® Avoid the Mature Figure. NSS a wontan has a beauti- J fully rounded figure she is very apt to lose her youthful con- tour before she reaches her thirty- fifth year, A settled figure is old, even ina gin A light, buoyant step should be cyltivated from earliest childhood and~ plenty of daily exer- cise, out of doors always when pos- sible, indoors when not, to keep the figure trim and trig. Nowhere else is that homely adage, “An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure,” so markedly ex He fied. A little daily exercise, a lute daily thought, will keep the figure young, whereas neglect puts on flesh, stiffens the joints, rounds the shoul- ders, broadéns the waist and back and causes the spinal column to sink, so producing that squatty appearance frequently seen in men and women of middle age. An enlarged abdomen is an unmistakable eign of encroaching years and should be discouraged in every possible way. The well-known exercise frequently alluded to in these papers of bending forward from the waist and touching the floor with the finger tips one hundred times is one of the surest meana of reducing the objectionable size. An abdominal support that can be adjusted to the figure as it diminishes is an exceHent thing for both men and women to wear. In many instances the feet, willing slaves as they are, age long before the remainder of the body., To obviate this and keep them young, supple and sprightly they should be rubbed every day with olive oil or any ether good lubricant. Careful dafly grooming, the utmost cleanliness of footwear and occasional medicinal foot baths are also essential to this end. Hare is an excellem bath for sensitive, deli- cate feet: Dried mint, 1 ounce; dried sage, 1 ounce; dried angelica, 3 ounces; juuiper berries, 1-2 pound; rosemary leaves, 1 pound. Bot} thirty ‘minutes in five quarts of water, use at moderate heat and immerse the feet in the bath for fifteen mimutes for several successive nights, vi Shaders alti tee NEW INVENTIONS. LIQUID which quickly dries and forms an airtight coating on their shatis to keep eggs fresh indefinitely has bees invented by a Michigan, man, ‘ An inventor has patented a bracelet with an extension sur- rounding @ thumb to prevent a child placing his thumb in his mouth, ae