The evening world. Newspaper, February 1, 1921, Page 21

TUESDAY, FEBRUARY 1, Fifth Ave. Buses Made Safe For: Spooning. OFFICIAL INVITATION TO LOVERS OUT. Realizing the Shortage of Parlors, Park Benches, &c., the Company Turns Down Mrs. Grundy’s Protests and Says ‘‘Come Ahead!” reformers are careful to inform Company has announced that its pol- icy 1s “Open engagements openly ar- rived at.” Cupid is the god }chind the motor bus. In its neat ttle publication, “Anewered in Full,” the bosses of the buses even take gently to task “Mrs. M. G. T.” of No. 561 West 141st Street, who addeg a drop to the wave of moral reform now inundating this land, in the ¢orm of a request that the aforesaid bosses put a stop to epooning alow and aloft on Fifth Avenue'd trundling green coaches. “One might as well attempt to stop the tides from ‘tiding’ as to stop the g@pooners from spooning,” “Mrs. M. G. T.” (1 wonder i¢ the “G.” stands for Grundy?) is assured. “Please tell us how it is you find spooning by some of our junior patrons eo disgist- ing and revolting? “To be sure, atop a Fifth Avenue bus may be am unconventional place for participation in this, the greatest of all pastimes. But where in this great city of ours are Bob and Betty to go, safe from the slander of idle tongues, to carry on their love mak- ing? “You say, ‘if a policeman mees a couple spooning in the park he can @rrest them.’ That's the trouble. It's @ mistaken policy. If we were doing % al) the parks, property and ade- quately supervised, would be thrown e@pen to the youmg lovers of this Great, big, glorious city of ours. “Where else ts there for them to ©? You will probably say there are many places—the theatre, the church wocial, the public Nbrary. Very good —but these places, after a day in the @ffice or workshop, soon become com- mopplace and monotonous uniess youth be permitted to indulge oc- casionally in that whi is normal and netural—love-making: ‘The Fifth Avenue first-aiders to Cupid touch upon what is one of the real problems of “life in a great city.” ‘This problem may be stated in’ terms ef a qhestion, vi “How can any girl have # beau |! she can't have @ beau parlor in which to put him? Ome of the saddest aspects of tho housing probiem in New York, just now, is the practical elinmination of the parlor from the average house or apartment. The boarding house land- lady, the leaseholder of a flat, are renting “that surplus room”—the par- lor where Cupid made his home—to ! By Marguerite Dean. Coprright, 1921, by the Prem Publishing Co,’ T° FIFTII Avenue buses have been made safe for spooning. (The New York Brening World) ‘Those are truly weloome tidings in a country where, as our best us frequently, there ie and should be fo such thing as personal liberty. To all true lovers, the Fifth Avenue Coach “SNEEZING CLOSET” CURES COLDS OF WELLESLEY GIRLS BRE it is—the “sneezing closet,” that has been installed at Wellesley College. When the gins feel a sneeze impending as the first signal that they have caught cold, they simply enter the closet, shut the door, and in its zine-lined, air-tight tastness inhale the fumes of formaldehyde and eucalyptus oil, with which the place is permeated. Its real name is “coryza closet,” but the “sneezing” title has caught the col- lege girls’ fancy. The above photo- graph shows Miss‘ Bxther Pareons nipping one in the bud, so to speak. help pay the exorbitant rents, Cupid is His piace is not in the home—not any more. As for his other favorite haunts, he Jost them long ago in Manhattan. “In the city,” as the pveriords of the buses rernind us, “there is the absence of the eld front porch with its old-fashioned hammock and clinging vines to ahut eut the peeping rays of the light on the street corner; the old gray horse from the nearby livery, which is ‘in the know,’ and with rein around whip stock stands without hitchin’; the old Jover's lane on the edge of the town, where tthe stars are the only critical ontookers; the moonlight excursions ttom’ creek to nearby pic- grounds. So when John Brown, filing clerk, fallsin love with Betty Smith, stenog- rapher, what are the poor things to Go? He can't “say it with flowers”—or ‘theatre tickets—or chocolates, These articles are in the luxury class, now- adays, even for ardent lovers, Ho ean't say it in the partor; there isn't any parlor. He can't afford to take her to a decent restaurant, and buy there a sufficient number of lemon- aries to give the two the privilege of pending the evening at a corner table. Most of Mrs, Grundy’s criticisms the behavior of young men and wom- en in a large city—of the epooning in the parks, op the beaches, on the Co- ney Island boats, in the darkened mo- vie houses—are based on the “vulgar Publicity” of sucn performances, But why does Mrs. Grundy offer no con- structive suggestion for correcting ‘his state of affairs? From the view- point of strict convention, of course, lovers ought not to make love in pub- Mo—but, equally of course, they ought not to HAVE to @mke love tn public. How many among the rank and file ot New York's boys and girfs can pay for that genuine luxury, privacy? If we are to choose between the two evils—the elimination of all love-mak- ing or spooning !n public: with an Interest in tion must choose th were no spooning 4 not only lovers of this generation, but the chil- dren of the next, would be “deletea by the censor”—and then whom would the Mex Grundys of that day have orttdcine? oe t “Realizing all the handicaps of the oity-bred youth,” the sympathetic ™atohmakers of the bus company wom up: “Who can find the heart to @eny or criticise an occasional indul- fence in innocent lovemaking—the greatest of all life’s mysteries—wheth- er it be atop a Fifth Avenue bus, in the park, or any other old place? We @on't believe we care to have our con- @uotors run the risk of interfering in @ach matters. Many times, we fear, more wrong than nt.” "B when Mre, Grundy takes a bus ged eees what whe will see, let her @ontent herself with pretending that he te @ chaperos, MAXIMS Or A MODERN MAID GUERITE MOOERS MARS/ALL ‘Con: 1Oal, by the Publiahing Co, Prews Now York Drenine World.) FRIEND is a person ‘who is perfeotly willing to play with you while travelting in the same direction, but who forgets you 4s promptly as you forget him efter Parting at the crossroads of destiny. When a man finds more than two ideas in a woman's head he is al- most as surprised as when he finds More than two oysters in a restau- rant stew. Thackeray said only half of it— any women without a positive hump can marry any man she wants; PROVIDED some other woman doesn't want him worse and work for him more cleverly. The cyniec's definition of home: a forcing house where the mean pre- Judices and passions of the normal man or woman attain abnormal de- velopment fn record time. Perhaps it is because they are ‘both blind that Love and Cruelty are po often playfellows. There isn’t much to this season's evening gown—except talk It is perfectly sate for a woman to marry a man with a past; provided she can feel perfectly certain that his future wil! remain her affair. One reason for the strange disap- pearance of the sweet, unselfish girl of simple tastes, who didnt want a young man to spend much money on her, ts that she so often discovered she wes helping him to save money to spend on some other girl. Marriage once was life's ultima- tum to a woman; now it may be merely the first of a series of notes. A heart worn on the sleeve is as out of place as a diamond necklace worn in the subway i Can You Beat It! _ Tie We York Wreatng W He’D DIE OF FRIGHT IF | LEFT HIM HONE HE CAN'T BARK HE [S DEAFAND _/ COME HERE ! | WON’T HURT YOu te, ) \AM GOING To TAKE DOGGIE ‘ SCARES HIM | | EI} COCKROACH To DEATH a © LEAVE HIM HOME! HE’LLBEA NUISANCE Translation of Young Sharkey Now Winning Success,Un- der His Own Name— Giuseppe Inzerillo—In Important Grand Opera Tenor Role. Coomera Rin ork Drain Walks ROM mitt skirmisher in a roped arena to one who Mits of the speech of angeis behind the operatic footlights is some transition but shat ls what has happened to Gluseppe inzerillo, now a member of the San Carlo Opera Company. Un der the name of Young Sharkey he listered to the plaudits of fight fans whose cries of Knock him out!” were music to his ears, but now the shouts from the diamond horseshoe of “Bravo! Bravo!" are eweeter. When New Yorkers enjoyed fistd- cuff matohes during the Frawley law days they enjoyed the efforts of & heavyweight youth who met all comers and pummelled them all tuitber and yon about the squared crete, It was this same “Young Sharkey." In the natural course of events this lad drifted away from the Big City. About this time Tom Simrkey, the real glove manipulmor of that mame, heard of “Young Shar- key" and belleved he would be a proper contender for Jack Dempeey's crown of thampion. Tom hied him- aelf to the land of sunshine and Gowers tn quest of his namesake. But—— “Young Sharkey” was no more—in name. The lure of cadenms and Brace notes was too strong for the former fighter, and he gracefully bowed to the call of grand opera. With mitts safely packed in campnor, he essayed the role of tenor robusto. What ho! After looking over the anticipated champion, Tom Sharkey went rue- fully back to his bungalow and said poftly to himself: “And I thought he wes geing to Te amount to something. And here he ig nothing but an opera singer. Oh, " Giuseppe Inzeritio sings Sameon in maon aad Delilah” and shikes the piliara of the musical ditorlum with the same degree tromor that he ropes surrounding the gladiato: box. By all who have listened to of formerly rocked the “reformed” prize fighter he lw said to." bave a powerful voice with @ wonder- ful range. But how did Inzerillo first get the inspiration to be a mitt Pusher? you ask. Listen: During bis early boyhood, Inzerilio picked up his hit-and-miss living by delivering telegrams in this city, One day an old gentleman with a fur- lined overcoat and a trick silk hat flashed a diamond ring before the youth's eyes and sai@ “What, a great big husky ike wasting your time delivering t gramé. Bah! Why don't you go out and ma@ke your living as a prize fighter?” ‘Giuseppe began to mix with bruisers. He talked thelr vernaculur, He gloated in the accounts on the sport pages of the papers. He was given a try out. Ho went over with o bang. Before ZERIM leng he tad earned the title of “Young Sharkey,” contender for heavyweight championship. Wt bouts began to wane fo thusiasm from the public got a Job as conductor 0 ie” language Move up tor ur step.” His a@hati pa and fa nd found that stand other. When “Sharkey” discovered monize with bis pal he forthwith told hie father. And forthwith his futher maid: “How come! You want to he a winger? Have you eaten too much vandy?" Perseverance on “Sharkey's" part convinced ¢duddy that his son could sing, and Carne, a famoue fifteen years ago, listened yee, a good a) one,” 3 And thi leap from f wus mc singing KR oppoatte®to Caruso,” sald Inzeritlo, “but I held my own. Oh, well, Lam thirty-two ond he le atty- Three, I am otill young. COURTSHIP ~—aAINITD - MADDIAGE BETTY VINCENT o! 1941. by the Pree Publishing Co, The New Tork Krenioe World) “cs EAR MISS VINCENT: | am a young =oman twenty-two years of age and | know a young lady three years my junior. er very dearly and she says loves me, We were keeping com- pany steadily for three months until | told her parents my na-~ tionality. Since then | have only seen her once, for won't go to her hor Please advise me what is the b thing to do? SAM C. D’ Do not try to meet the young Indy without her parents’ knowledge, The only thing for you to do is to go right straight to them, tell them you love the girl and she loves you and then Covriatat ask them If, despite these facts, they still object’ to your friendship. If they do I am afraid you had better sion and @eak @ natic abide by their d girl of the same “Dear Miss Vincent: constant reader of your helpful column and would like you to help know a young man of im nineteen) and enjoyed every company. But, Miss young man has been TUES Y, FEBRUARY 1, 1921 AALF..22=:.LOAF” Hait a Loaf Beats Being a Loafer, but Working Hall — Time Has Its Disadvantages When You Bring a Two-Fisted Appetite Into a One-Arm Lunch and Business Is Duller Than a Wooden Indian's Tomahawk. Copyright, 1021, by phe Proms Publishing Co, (The New York Bruning World.) t H*" a loaf is better than no pay at all, At a time when usiness is duller than a wooden Indian's tomahawk, when Ford jokes are the enly part of the car still seing assembled, it is no time for the laborer to get chesty. ments by Washington's Birthday. Ford will try to get the buyers out of the retretme— That'll help some, but meantime i> tired workingman is hungry. And working half time has its disadvan~ tages when you bring a two-fisted appetite Into a one-arm lunch, A laboring guy will listen to reason now, Almost any one would be willing to work eleven hoars in the vineyard now, without kicking at the pay. aren't s0 cocky. And im other lines of sweating endeavor, the stalwarts ‘The electricians “are killing less time per kilowatt hour and the plumbers remember to bring all their tools. The typographical uniog ip charging less for typographical errors, and bank clerks are now williag to work the first six months without knowing the combination, Con ductors pull the rope on every four fares out of five. The literary guys are taking five cents a word, with discounts om stuttering heroes. rhymes, with time and a The poets are accepting a dollar for every line thag THE HEAD WAITER WILL SMILE AT THE CUSTOMERS WITH : OUT A GUARANTEE. half for limericks. The only writers that haven't reduced their rates are the guys that are writing prescriptions. Charity solicitors vo reduced their percentage from 80 to 60 per cent. Chiropodists are offering special rates, They will treat three bi or a florist to help scrub the floor. the fall garbage pail. The dogs havq quit striking for This is the first season the snow shovelers haven't been up to their eck in work, showing that (imes ve hard, even if the winter isn't, Vaude- ville actors no longer insist on three days off in six, and the cab starter at the automat js satisfied with conditions, The only branch of skilled lahpr that can work a full day and 4s atill striking are the cuckoos in the cuckeo clocks. Everybody's retrenching but the cigar smokers. Give them enough rope and they'll choke themselves trying to inhale the smoke. The gar- ment trade has patched up an agreement to sew union buttons for non- union buttonholes. The headwaiters will smile at the customers without a guarantee. The train criers are willing to call local trains for the same rates as expresses. Except they grab 20 per cent. extra for Erte routes. You see redactions everywhere. ‘Taxi drivers will accept what the meter says without adding in the lcense plate, The second-stery workers are now willing to break into bungalows. The skirt makers are doing more hemming while the male sightseers do more hawing. Junk dealers are now taking more paper and giving less weight, and the customer is getting a better deal with the fortane tellers, They now tell your fortune with dences wild. Yep, business is in second speed. except the mortality rate among instalment collectors, every day. And everything's heen reduced That's increasing Copyright, 1901, by the Prem Publishing Co. E promed to atop in at Mr. ° BY row 7 “6 and Mr. Rangles, you re- member?” remarked Mr. Jarr, who todd fussing around all Gressed up with somewhere to go, “we've got plenty of time,” replied Mrs, Jarr, looking at the clock. “It's only 7, and Mra. Rangle won't be dressed and ready yet for halt an hour, | know. Why were you s0 an- xious to have those people go to the theatre with us?” When they arrived at the Rangte domicile, hewever, they found Mrs. Rangle bad a severe headache and she and Mr. Rangle had decided not to go. Gaoait headach® take any more powders,” Mra, Jarr advised, "Come in your room and let me rub your head. Iam very magnetic. Mr, Jarr always has me rub his head when he has a headache.” This was news to Mr, Jarr, but the two ladies withdrew to the privacy of Mrs, Rangle’s boudotr. “Lay you ten to one they start to abuse their mutual friends and that 9 three times and disap- ‘Mrs. Jurr isn’t out of that room in pointed the lady each time. I know half an how said Mr. Jarr gloomily he thinks a lot of me, but I really You're a fine sport, wanting tc don’t see enough of him to make 2¢t on a sure thing!" sneered John him care. How can | ask him to W. Han . call and not seem too anxious? After twenty minutes’ wait M “VERY MUCH IN LOVE.” Jarr looked at his watch and cal to his good lady that they were al- if I were you I would not ask this ready late, or would be lute, for the young man to call, Since he hus theatre. been engaged so many times be as- “I'll be there ina minute! Give me sured he knows enough to call if he time to say a word to poor Mrs. cares to do so. Make HIM do the Rangle." Mrs. Jarr called back. “1 asking. It may just be that the other girls to whom he was engaged were oat all without Mrs. Jarr add~ friend. “It really don't care to you and Mr. Rangle, ed to her indiaposed entirely too anxious. Why not try the “keep-him-guessing” game? seems heartless to’ wo to the theatre and leave you here with a headache “Dear Miss Vincent: A girl Besides, if it is a play where every- friend is giving a sweet sixteen body is successful and has turned a party, | would like to take her Jay town into a moetropolls in one @ present but do not know what year by the dreamy and neglected to aclect. Please do net sungest Vill genius having his patents candy E. J. F.” financed by the young 1 who comes from the clty to Mid Cor How ut Gowers? Writing paper ners, a failures Mr, Jarr will get mad alwi an appropriate gift to a He doesn't like those playa, eae young lady, Also a book, a paper- cially where they end with all the utter, u fan or any little simple rubes of the village in full dress and present which attracts the eye the women in Paris gowns.” Never give a young girl Jewelry wn- less you are engaged to ber, “t think they are grand!” emid Mrs. Rangle. “But, really, you ~> “> RE: LMG CA Lt + (The New York Brening World) ter go'now, dear; I'm feeling better t “I know we'll be late,” said Mrs. Jarr to her husband when they got outside, “That woman just held me there so we'd be.” “It's all right now, honey,” led ‘be, Mr. Jarr. “I knew how |t wou! and before you started to dress a home I put the clock ahead an hour.” s “That wasn't fair’ said Jarr, “and you know | dislike du- plicity. Why do you «poll every- thing? I had put the clock beck myself!” that = About Bond Bread,