The evening world. Newspaper, September 3, 1919, Page 20

F About Plays EBRCY HAMMOND, Critic of the Chicago Tribune, artived on Broadway yester- Mr. Hammond comes to New “ork once a year about this to get some first d informa- on the theatrical "s pros- This year he knew the actors’ was on, but he came down to see just what the theat- and Prohibition had to the town. In the office of Hi Page, press representative of Producing Managers’ Association, Tan across lorria Gest. “Hello, Morris!” said Percy. “Have rer succeeded in getting a play of Ring Lardner?” * jo,” replied Mr. Gest, “but I ex- to." “And thereby bangs a tale. 2 \ ‘March a little party in a cafe Chicago was made up of Messrs. id, Gest, Lardner and Page. ‘ME Page leaned over dnd whispered Gest: Morris, this guy Lardner is @ dright writer. Why don't you Pereuade him to write you a play?” +, @urning to Mr. Lardner, the theat- Manager said: “Have you ever fa play, Mr, Lardner?” cri * replied Ring. “I have prom- 4 several managers to write tor ‘them, but they have never come D wes a winner,” said 00d gamble, any- STRIKE NOTES, And only & couple of weeks ago it Blogteld jr: yowterdny ‘paid. sal me Sarees os strike. q $14,000 was taken in mea on Monday, according to Co! ayiee GS Wood entitl ying Prinee? wilt be one o! produced by the: Rauity ab the . Avenue tre, Cort the Lester" scenery from to ‘by motor trucks, strike is hitting the SX hard. No. after-the-thea' nowadays. ‘ SINCE MARY WENT AWAY. Ite quiet ‘round this little form, An’ ev'rything seems wrong; The wovin' corn has lost its charm, Aa has the bluebdird’s song. The sunshine raye aren't half so bright om the flelds they play— fact, there's nothin’ acems just » right : ince Mary went away. n't think she'd marry him, Though he's aM right, I guess, cup is filled clear to the brim A DOUBTFUL INVITATION. Sara and Mrs. Connor ‘were very warm friends, but littie Gerald and Jack were al- ‘fighting.’ ter an unusually hot dattlc be- the boys, Jack's mother urged to make friends with Gerald, and inducement offered to give him i y if he would invite Gerald to it. parly was @ great success, but} did not appear, Mra, Connor ‘Where was Gerald Connolly?” did not know. "’Now, Jack.” asked the mother, ‘guapiciously, “you did invite him?” Yes, Lid! Yes, ma’am, I invited “him, and 1 dared him to come,"— Judge. eS one of the most important ‘ features of the modern trial,” femarked a ‘well known Judge, how difficult i intelligent and un- ner at one time, I a whole week was a ELBCTING a jury bas become oe Fgeall once whe spent in selecting a jury to try killing, Finally one old fellow seemed @ fll'the bill and would complete the quota, He had no prejudices, wax fret opposed to capital punishment 68 was cons'dered a valuable find. So ie prosecuting dy, ‘Juror, look dpon the prisoner; Prironer, look upon the juror.’ The old man adjusted his spec- facies and peered at the prisoner for fa full half minute, Then, turning tc court, he said: ‘Judge, durned ii he’s guilty.’ "San ut + 17 WAS ALL RIGHT, an address to'his troops an off cer_ot @ Midland yeomanry regi army veterans in the ranks, By BIDE DUDLEY @ramatic; A weddin’ day for us might come— | | donkey 7” “When he stands on his banks and brags.” torney sald solemn- | ment mado 4 stirring allusion to medals which were worn by sev- a and’ Players That dream has come to naught, I guess I shouldn't spoke to her, It might 'a’ come out fine, Jest thinkin’ of it brings a blur Into these cyes of mine. I didn't, so 1 ‘spose it’s right That I should have to pay— The sunshine rays ain't half #0 bright Since Mary went away. HE TOOK IT SERIOUSLY. While the Hippodrome was closed last week the sign in front of tho ‘building reading “‘Happy Days’ Twice Daily at the Hippodrome” was made to read “Nothing Doing Twice a Day at the Hippodrome” The humor of the new announcement was commented on widely and got into the newspapers. Yesterday a letter was received at the big playhouse from a man in Waterbury, Conn. reading: “Please reserve two seats for me for Saturday evening’s performance of ‘Nothing Doing.’” Go! 3 Dorothy Preyer is to leave the movies and return to the spoken drama. June Korie, soprano, is now singing at Churchill's. The cabaret now is given continuously from 7.15 P. M. to the closing hour. Glarenee Bach, now making Johnny Dooley Film Comedies, may decide to do some producing for the regular stago in the near future OYR BABY DEPARTMENT. Doria, aged 2, found her Aunt Cath- erine seated at the piano hammering away, “What su doin’?” asked the baby. “I'm playing a Beethoven Sonata” replied her aunt. ; “Don't do sat,” said Doris with a frown. “Play ze pinanna.” LOOK AT THIS, BRONX! That Brooklyn-Bronx feud between the poets is about to break out again, we fear. Sam Schindler, of Brook- lyn, has sent us the following orige inal rhyme; The poets of the Bronz Write awful bummy, Tm inclined to think Bach one a rummy. “Yet I don't blame them At all; nay, nay? Because I'm eure the Brona Gote them that way, — A THOUGHT FOR To-Day. Hep A maf, Pickens of ing to e8- tablish @ crematory -there wes told the town was not interested in dairy projects. The farmer yelled: “AN out, my men, And let us plough the corn, We'll work from 5 A. M, wntit We hear the dinner horn.” The men were very much surprised, No corn was on the place,~ And now you have the story of Old Farmer William ‘Moos, FROM THE CHESTNUT TREE. “When is a Scotchman like a “I give it up.” very thoughtful frame of mind, and next drill day came on parade with three silver medals pinned on his manly chest, Seeing them glittering in the sunshine, the officer approached the man. “I did not know you had been in the ware,” he said. “No, I ain't,” was the reply. “Well, how about the medals? They can't be yours.” The yeoman eyed his superior offi- cer contemptuously and then replied: “Can't they? Aye, but they be! ™ old cow won ‘em all at cattle shows! London Tit-Bits, GRA! D EVERYTHING. HEN Lioyd George was about fourteen, his guardian uncle, Richard Lioyd, was puzzled what to make of him. To help bim in choosing a cureer for the lad he put him in a room with a Bible, an apple and a shilling. If the boy chose the Bible he was to be a parson, if the apple he was to go into horticulture, and if the shilling he wag to be a jaw- yer When the uncle went Into the room | some time later he found young David seated on the Bible, cating the apple, |having painted the shilling to look |like a sovereign.—Buffalo Commercial, —_—_o RESUSCITATED, MAN from Nebraska went into iA a saloon in Kansas City and wrote on a plece of paper, “A glass of whiskey, please,” The bartender did as he was bid and gave the man a drink, and after he was finished with this one he wrote for another and still another, ‘Then he wrote, “How much do I owe ‘The bartender said that was all right because he didn't charge deat and dumb men. G 2 On-Ho~ Tin Pick OUT ANOTHER ~ THis ONE. WoNT SHOOT Sik = WRAP IT UP_ That s The Kind Yo ES “uN”! DAWGONIT=: TINA’ SAYS, LAST Buck UP“ KURLY” : P cua, oer AN' I DID'NT DENY HER STATEMENT . QUICK ENOUGH “TO eurT Her! Wot me f “S'ALL OFF ‘TWEEN MY * “TINA” AN’ M-ME-€~ Narter wet WaT Love -SicK BEAUTIFUL ENOUGH ee me wire”! MY WEART \S ON FIRE THIS WILL BE wy, Love FOR YoU * _ VERY eet (8 AFU q aW LAST TIME meee Thu See Wr “ , stu "Ww “WILY! et tt kn “NoBopx" HE GETS A SATISFACTORY. ADJUST-« MENT ON A BUI TIRE | Send x Nebody' te Grindstone George * Yes =a HE WAS AFRAID WE EVEW WA THE COURAGE 70 FIRE THE Coor ANO TALK BACK TOS WieEet CYPHER, WAS A BRAVE GUY. He WAS A MAM WHE KNEW NO FEAR! W0CLe CHEST WAS OVER BURDEMED WITH MEDALS HE RECEIVEP FOR BRAVERY! MIAY Come ANO ™ HEROES May &8, GUT THERE NEVER: WAS ? BRAVER AAW ‘Sunk is THAW ON CLE +we mouse. 7 Me set 2 pyar Cleveland One The customer spoke up: “H—, Tm not deaf and dumb; I am from Nebraska and was so dry I couldn't -wewan. of the yoomen went home in @ talk,"—Nebraska A) Copyright, 1919, by The Bel! Syndicate, IN eS MCMANUS,