The evening world. Newspaper, July 13, 1917, Page 12

, Los out there and, gosh, how he hates it! About Plays | and Players By BIDE DUDLEY RTHUR HAMMERSTEIN |s an- nouncing his plans for the coming season. His first pro- @uction to reach New York will be “De Luxe Annie,” described as & play of mystery, It is by Edward Clark, The Broadway opening will take place during the Gret week in September, Willette Kershaw heads the cast. Others are incent Serrano, Albert Bruning, Thurlow Bergen and Mary Hall. “Furs and Frills,” a musical comedy grith book and lyrics by Mr. Ciark and music by Btlvio Hein, will open at the Astor Theatre Oct. 29, “Prosti- tution,” a drama by the weil known Hammers' personal playWright,! Eéward Clark, will open out of town Sept, 3. The annual Hammerstein musical play, with music by Hugo Felix, is scheduled to open in New York New Year's Day. The Hammer- etein annual summer musical com- edy, series of 1918, with book and rics ‘@ young man named Edward ark music by Silvio Hein, is to, fntdé the Casino on April 1, 1918. in addition to all these three com- panies presenting “You're In Love’ ‘and one offering “Katinka” will go on tour in the United State 6 will be @ “High Jinks” troupe in Can- ada, MOORE'S ROUTE. Eugene Moore, who used to be @ stage band at the Rialto Theatre, joined the field artillery tho other day, Then, arrayed in his uniform, he dropped in at the Rialto to visit. “Howdy, Gene!” said Joe La Kove, “Want your old Job back?” J “Not me!” replied Moore. “I'm all booked up for next season. Open in Paris and close in Berlin! JOHNSON HERE AT LAST. ‘Late Johnson, Denver's jinconscious bumorist, has come to New York to do @ litte urging in connection with @ drama he has penned. If you don't Jook out, dear reader, the play may be weed in the fall, Lute is at the Longacre Hotel, where he says all are welcome to drop in, meet him ‘and have @ tittle chat about this and tet , BY WAY OF DIVERSION. Our Maggie's making up 4 dress It’s such a stylish thing! When Mag- Gie wears it sbe'll be fit to meet a queen or king. Tho skirt, however, seems too short. Those ot Ce . 1@ 9a; the sty! LJ Sea Er ee season ed so much the She Skirt comes up until it hits ber knees. But Maggie vows economy Fee cf oon. 8 if you please. All Seon wear the dress. Smvbtersnx yet but what wan neatly x sax ye what was ni filled. It's fine for her to help -to put the Germans on the bum, but if her patriotism grows, I fear for what will come = A TALE OF AN ANKLE. Norman Trevor left last night for Angeles. He is to do some acting It is Mr. Trevor's pet ambition to boulder a gun and fight in France, | 4 Dut be has an ankle that won't let him. Twice, while in England, he tried to enlist but the ankle, broken some years ago, stopped him. Com- ing to America he tried it in Canada and again the old ankle pied bis plans, Still determined to feel the ating of a bullet, he went to the Brit- dsb recruiting shop here and tried to get in the army. Same result! They discovered the ankle. So now he is en route West to be leading man for Eleanor Painter in “The Pursuit of if the stage manager does NAUGATUCK’S DARK HOUR. You may think your home town ts unlucky, dear reader, but you'll get overt when you hear what has hap- pened to Naugatuck, Conn. A citizen of that place, one Jeno, has sent us a rhyme which is really discouraging, We're going to print |t a rebuke to the authorities of Naugatuck for their laxity, Now! Z } ‘Boere, wes, rome man mained Bonny, Ar a basuel be ‘te so touch sunk, at tbe Dondk ! ‘That later at y And that got sunk, the Iie sarer's Nauny, TO SWIM IN FILMS AGAIN. Annette Kellermann, after her suc- cessful engagement at the Hippo- @rome, is to return to film acting. She fe planning to appear in another big feature picture in which her aquatic talents will be the feature. Gossip, Raymonii Hitchcock has a new war Mogan. It is, “Bump Berlin or Bust!” Bvelyn Grieg of “Oh, Boy” is a fourth cousin of Edward Grieg, the courposer. Now, what do you think of that? The Hempstead Aviation baseball team will cross bats to-morrow with the Lights nine at Freeport. Bet the Hempstead twirler goes up in the air! Rehearsals began to-day for “Bus\- ness Pefore Pleasure,” the new Pot- ash & Perlmutter comedy which A H. Woods will offer at the Bitinge | early in August. A THOUGHT FOR TO-DAY. When Asa Hodgkins of Perkle, Ky., Jearned his uncle, Hod Perkins, had left no fortune he said he was sorry the old man died. FOOLISHMENT. ‘Asked (ierien, bo (She had’ « mid colt) FROM THE CHESTNUT TRE Bridegroom—My wife is the la word in wives. Family Man—Nonsense! fen't any #vuch a thing. 161 W, 128th ot, Tel, Morningside 6000, There | Jatreet wert my SEER “PoP I'm very THORR ] WENT OuT IN THA bs AMV th 2a toa 2 e sd Aji The Day’s Good Stories | ITTLP NELLY, while at the sea- shore with her mother, was very fond of making calls upon some ladies in @ neighboring cottage, and the frequency with which she would bring home little presents of cards and pic- tures, etc., led her mother to fear that she might be in the habit of asking for these things. Bhe therefore gave the child strict orders never to do such @ thing. The next day Nelly re- turned from her visit laden down with Pretty odds and ends of various sorts, and when her mother called her and questioned her severely if she had asked for these things, she replied, with conscious virtue: “No, mother You told me I must never ask for things, go 1 just took ‘em."—Har- per’s Bazar, AS HE S8Aw IT. as average foreigner can rarely comprehend the geographical area of the United States, as was quite fully illustrated by the Englishman und his valet who had been travelling due west from Boston for five days, At the end of the fifth day master and servant were seated in the smoking car, and it was ob- served that the man was gazing steadily and thoughtully gut of the window, Finally his ¢iapknion came curious, “William,” eid he, what are you thinking? , about the “I was just thinkin discovery of Hamert replied the “Columbus didn't do such a valet, wonderful thing, after all, when he LITERAL OBEDIENCE. \ found this country, did he, now sir? after all's said an’ done, ‘ow could ‘elp \t?"—KEverybody's Magazine, M'TAVISH'S COMPROMISE. CANNY Bcot owned ® wonder- ful badger it was reported no dog could tackle. However, a friend of his had a dog he proposed = to back against the badger, and oa match was in due course made for = £100, to come off in two months’ time. As the time drew near there wero rumors that all was not right with the dog, and the Scot's friends were mak- ing sure of victory for him, Imagine their surprise and disgust when they heard that McTavish had accepted £50 as a compromise in lieu of the £100, “You've been done, Mai of them. sald one “The dog is so mangy and unfit he could not kill a rat.” “Ah, ah!" said MeTavish, “I dare say, but my badger is dead."—London Globe. BROTHER KNEW WHY. ISTDR and little brother had been to the dog show and were great- ly interested tn the hatrless can- ines from Mexico, At the dinner | Moving Picture Funnies (Copyright, National Newapaper | oot Bumstead’s Worm Syrup cnt BitiNeL HY ® surprieing result, Service, Patent Applied For.) Cut out the picture on all four sides, Then carefully fold dotted line 1 Ite entire length, Then dotted line 2, and then dotted line 3. Fold each nm underneath accurately, When completed turn ove ind you'll find table mamma told them that some friends of hers once had one of those Mexican dogs and that they had a aid mamma, “why suppose they called him But sister didn't seem to be able to figure it out. “I know, mamina,” volunteered ‘Because the mines are in ‘Indianapolis News, LOW PRICES, IARLES M. SCHWAB, apropos of the $5 advance in steel rails, said at a dinner at his house in Riverside Drive: “We may growl about high prices, but we'd growl worse about low ones. High prices are a sign of good times, but low prices always have an omi- nous significance, “It's like the story of the poulterer’s son, “Just before the holidays a teacher said to a poulterer's little son: “ ‘Now, Tommy, if your father hada turkey weighing twenty-seven pounds and sold it for six cents a pound, what would dt be worth?’ “The little son of the poulterer wrinkled up his nose in @ sneer. “It wouldn't be worth anything,’ he said.""—Washington Star. CONFEDERATE MONUMENTS, N the pleasant drive of perhaps @ dozen miles from Harper's Ferry to Charlestown, W. Va., I noticed here and there at the road- side pyramidal stones suggesting monuments, yet bearing no inacrip- tion save that each had a number. On inquiry I learned that thess were, indeed, Confederate monuments, but that to find out what they marked it was necessary to go to the county court. house at Charles. town and look up the numbers tn a book, of which there is but one copy. These mon- uments wero set out three or four years ago. They appeared suddenly, almost as though they had grown overnight, and many people won- , as I had, what they meant "one Charlestown young | lady asked another, “what's that} monument out in front of your hox with 21 on it?” voir hoes "Oh," replied Eloise, “that's where all my suitors are buried.”—Julian Street in Collier's Weekly A BRUTAL ATTACK, N actor visited a beauty doctor to see if he could have some- thing done for his nose, The beauty doctor studied the organ, and suggested @ complicated stratghten- ing and remodeling process—cost 20 guineas, “IT may go you," sald the actor thoughtfully, He stroked his nose before the mirror, regarding it from all sides, “Y T think I'll go you. But, look here, do you promise to give my nose—er—tdeal beauty?” The surgeon gave @ loud, brutal gh, ‘As to ideal beauty, I can't say,” he replied, “but, by gosh! ' help improving it a lot if I hit it with @ bammer,"’. m2 Opinion, Sida dak Wert, See Har IT Donsny +arPen AGAIN, THATS ALL Seems Yer me iF Hem ORDERS Wuz GAVE To By Clifton Meek Now y'see DEAR ~ First wits YOUR LEFT Foot GEE HERE HE COMES AGAIN | NOW MOVE “THIS JIGGER To THE RIGHT AND Ses (T BACK —THERE - Now YER IN “Low” Hey! wotTTa Y LET THAT | QLUTCH IN So QUICK FOR? | THRow it ouT !! THROW ha \T OUT 2c Y'PUSH THE CLUTCH ovT ~~ THat’s it! — KINDLY REMEMBER To WHEN YOU WISH To as Bits Sc. Zee. {m GONNA BEAT THE STUFFIN’ OUTA YOU IN Arew bars! Now SPEED UP Y'MOTOR -- Not Too FAST! ~ = TWat's RIGHT ~ - Now LET IN Y' CLUTCH wT YER LEFT Foot AN’ we'RE ORF! : \'m Not DEAE! MODIFY YOUR TONE AppREss ME ! Jt'S WIFE 1S GONNA ry DRE THE “cc ABELLE MAE!” The words floated out on the still night alr, A woman's voice floated them, “Ellabelle Mae! Miss Doolittle, the noted postess of Delhi, sprang out of the hammock down near the potato patch and 4 for the house. star “Yes, mother, dear! came her re- sponse. ‘The cool night alr fanned her brow and made the poetess kick out behing in the joy of living. “Yes, mother, dear!" gentle. “Mr, Bquibbs is here to have you write him @ po ‘And so the situation disentangled It was #0 Itself. Mr. Squibbs, the town's most prominent lunch counter proprietor, greeted the great poetess on her aide T couldn't | porch. “To-night,” he said, “I am to speak at the Walters’ Convention, I would x \ like to read them an original poem ot advice, Now I, as you know, am not talented enough to take a pen and designate a poem out of my own head Would you, Miss Doolittle, honor to me and the wait me one? Would you wonder The Delhi goetess gave Mr. Squibbs her hand. &» took it, Little bir out fo, @ night session, flew around the yard and chirped without the siigntest hesitancy. it reminded one of Lee giving his sword to Grant at-— at—well, wherever the final reel of the Civil War was filmed, She gave him her hand. “Sure!” she said, "I shall be de Mghted, ‘The only pay I shall ask, my dear Mr, Squibbs, will be a cup of coffee at your lunch counter, free from grounds and an occasional cock- roach,” “You shall have !t,” he replied. “Not |d the cock-roach—the coffee. Miss Doolittle excused herself grace- fully and beat ‘It upstairs to her bou- doir, There, with a pen gripped firm- ly in her hand and the ink In close proximity, coaxed the muse to give By Bide Dudley up and, in fifteen minutes, she had scratched down the following poem Hiram Sauibte, it to your little eity lamas and Povpy, Sinter's child, Teenay Ricketts, thor here to-night ak over the walters’ trade be lor of” poor fools Tike Tustivens fo far tm tocay ‘There was a creaking noise on the front stairs. scending. Hiram’ Squtbbs stood on the porch enthralled. He knew ho had some- thing coming to him; likewise to the waltera, Suddenly the poetess burst out and fell over Rover, the family are, ‘Get the she used @ word which often 8 as an outlet for the injured ngs of the talented) out of here: @ sald to the dog. The dog did . The Doolittle family Hned up on Misa Doolittle was de- | the porch, So did Hiram Squibbs. The poetess read the poem. When she had finished Hiram Squbbbs kissed her hand and thanked her with un- loading tear ducts, | ,Thowe on the porch stomped thetr feet and applauded with | AN were pleased Great gusto, —. eae