The evening world. Newspaper, June 3, 1916, Page 10

The E ve ni The ERAN World. STARLISHED Published Daily Except sun¢ RY J H PULITZER by the Press Publishing Company, Park Row, New York. RALPH PULITZDR, Pri J. ANGU Tre JOSEPH Tentered at the Post-office at Gubseription Rates io The World for the United Sta New York as Second-Class Matter, ening| For England and the Continent ai All Countries fn the International Postal Unton $0/ One Year... +30! One Month. IN THE NORTH SEA. HILE the first great naval battle of the war is likely to seem greater than it is because it is the first, results appear to have been, nevertheless, definite enough to promise a pow- erful reaction upon the feelings of the public in both Germany and Great Britain. As nearly as it is possible to balance fairly the respective claims and admissions of the two Admiralties, the British fleet had decidedly the worst of it. The three British battle cruisers Queen Mary, Indefatigable and Invincible, which the British Admiralty adinit were destroyed, repre- eented an aggregate tonnage, measured in displacement, of 63,000. The battleship Pommern, the largest German vessel lost, dis- placed not quite 13,000 tons. The Wiesbaden, sunk by gun fire, was only a small cruiser, and the Frauenlob, which failed to turn up at the German base, displaced but 2,715 tons. The Queen Mary, the Indefatigable and the Invincible were built at a total cost of well over & | than 2,500 officers and men, 20,010 00,000, and together carried more The Pommern, rated as a %6,000,000, vessel, carried 729 officers and men, while on the Frauenlob were only | @ third as many. | The bare facts and figures of the sea encounter near the yer thus give Germany an advantage which will be hailed as a telling| victory in Berlin. ‘ Maybe England will fare better in the end for being startled into a realization that even her formidable fleets cannot for a moment take their superiority for granted. The British lion has had to learn! tome pretty disturbing facts about himself. | + | PROSPERITY WITH DEAD ENDS. | NTERESTING and significant is the survey of the country’s! prosperity made by the Federal Reserve Board from the reports of its regional agents. Business and banking conditions have seldom been better.) ‘Money is easy, with plenty of it to loan. Collections are unusually good. | Savings banks report increased deposits. Railroad earnings are! excellent. The crop outlook is generally favorable. Good times are) unmistakably in full swing, Yet there are two serious handiceps. “Wages in general,” the Board notes, “are probably higher than ever before, yet many strikes occur over questions of wages, hours and unions, and this unrest is! noticeable even where labor is most highly compensated.” Who's going to meet these mounting overdrafts on the future? Closely associated with labor troubles is the congestion of export freight at American ports. Just at the moment when railroads and tteamship lines ought to be moving vast quantities of American goods| with a maximum of efficiency and despatch, the traffic machinery | breaks down. Strikes are partly to blame. But the railroads have been inex- eusably stupid in not foresecing the great acccleration of trade and making plans to meet it. | Prosperity is with us, handle it. | | | The shame is we don’t know how to| —2 go - INVENTED BY AN AMERICAN. ENTION of a new automatic hand gun that sprays billets upon an enemy almost like water from a hose has frequently appeared of late in letters and despatches from the west-| ern war front, This gun, first adopted by the Belgians, and since used by English and French, is the invention of a retired United States Army officer, Cal, 1. N. Lewis, It is described as only a little heavier than an ordinary rifle, big of barrel (which can be supported on a kind of} tripod rest) and fitted with a magazine that looks like a sprocket! wheel. It can fire a maximum of 600 shots a minute or ten shots| every second. The allies are said to regard this gun as one of the} greatest weapons of the war, and are supplying themselves with it as| fast as the munition factories can turn it out. Uvl. Lewis offered the gun first to the United States Govern- ment, but there was nobody wise enough to secure it for Uncle Sam. Remembering how many first class fighting machines—monitor, sub- marine, rapid-fire gun, aeroplane—originated in this country, mightn’t it he well for the nation to show a little more confidence in its own inventors? Hits From Sharp Wits One of the most tragic moments in f boy's life is when he discovers that he must go to work oe 8 Some men propose five or six times hefore they are accepted, but not ale that of being ready to laugh t ment the boss has reached the of his funny story.—Toledo Blade, ee Many a public mo well have man donates to some) ment the money he might] Bate ior the ina eee kee, used to pay his butcher,| News e same woman.—MACOn | Darer or grocer—Macon News, nA ie vaac’ If you let the fellow who knows itl acne ne gnsons Keep themselves in ail do all the talking for five min- | Aobk &S spending the money that they utes he'll jump from plausibility to . . absurdity in one bound, 7 | Another kind of preparedness is 1 . Even a man with a limited vocab lary can use many words to say noth- ing.—Albany Journal, ER ea Letters From the People The Penny ‘To the Editor of Th T noticed in account of the penny lunches that are { y ’ x to be given to the needed appetite of _, MY WHIGBARD our school children, I want to cons | Net im Some #1 gBratuiate you on the same. 1 know | To the Fditor of The Evening World of no more noble act. No child can do Justice on an empty stomach you every success in your great effort, | J. CHAMBERS President 28th Ward Taxpayers’ Pro. tective Association Ves. Ter ‘To the EAlior of The Prening World Anybody born in the United States | Whose father is not a citizen can vote when he reaches age? Kindly inform me in your “Letters | From the People” if the soldiers and tailors vote on Election Day CONSTANT READER. No, | ow cd The Evening World we pere any means by which an} I bave been a reader of The Eve: alien may become a citizen of the ning's World's Question Department United States without residing five | for many years and find many ‘n- | years in the United States or serving | teresting questions asked and an in any capacity at sea or | e@wered, So | venture to ask one. The! ited States army? | Substance of my question is whether | JAMES M'CARTIE. | ‘ , {tion so far behind | Hughes could get away with a cam- | |" Who Says BEFORE | | PEACE. Copyright, 19) ‘“ BLL." remarked the head W polisher, “they finally got a etatement from Justice Hughes.” “It might as well have been a state- Ment from the learned jurist's vic- trola,” said the laundry man, “It is a statement that doesn't say any- thing that hasn't already been said. “You will note that Justice Hughes authorized his secretary to say that no man js authorized to use his name ag a Presidential possibility, But you will also note that Justice Hughes does not say he wouldn't accept the nomination, “Frank Hitchcock, at whom the Hughes declaration was levelled, had discounted it the day before by an- nouncing that he was not the per- sonal representative of — Justice Hughes and had not consulted with ustice Hughes, But Mr, Hitchcock, With all his well known propensity for | sticking close alongside the band- | wagon, keeps right on working in the interests of Justice Hughes in Chi- cago, and the closest observation fail to reveal Justice Hughes taking steps to get out an Injunction restraining the activities of the blond ex-Post- master General, “Ot course Justice Hughes is a can- didate for the nomination and ail the G. O, P. politicians know it, and that's what makes them 80 dog-goned ex- | asperated, The New York politicians know that Mr, Hughes is following | the tactics he followed when, because | of his success in the insurance in- | vestigation, his party picked him to| run for Governor, He wouldn't ad- | mit he was a candidate, but he ran for office and was elected twice, com- | ing under the wire in the second elec- | the rest of his | | ticket that he was scarcely Visible in the dust, “If the convention nominates tlee Hughes he will, doubtless, acc This condition digs another hole for the GO, P, politicians, ‘They are afraid that he may issue a forma ceptance coupled with the announce. | ment that he considers it beneath the | dignity of a Justice of the Supreme | Court to get out and hustle and he intends to hang on to his present Job | until the Presidential issue is settled by the people, Practical politicians | do not believe that even Justice | paign of silence and ice.” Brrr { Canned Squirrel Food. 3 | ben 667M slag.” sald the head potisher, that the Poilee Commissioner | is about to proceed against this Person Bouck White who burned the | American flag.” “White,” said the laun man “can't be proceeded against for his latest insult to the flag until he gets through serving lis term in’ the Queens County Jail for a previous in sult, When he is released the next time It would be proper for the au thorities to submit his head to ea amination, | $750.000.000 MORE SPENT THIS YEAR ON ARMY AND | NAVY THAN EVER The Week’s Wash — By Martin Green — by The Preas Publishing Go. (The New York Evening World.) | Job ahead of him, We're Doing Nothing ?” ee eee en IN TIME OF, ng World Daily Magazine, Saturday, June 3. 1916 _ . + By J. H. Cassel Cops rialt, 18. by ‘The Brew Publishing Co ‘Tie New York Evening World.) wane — By Roy L. “Mr. White and the other fanatics who burned the flags of their native countries and swore allegiance to a y call International Industrialism ought to be put out of reach of the squirrels, They aren't criminals and a Jail is no place for them, for they consider a term in jail @ period of martyrdom. Where they belong is in a large bullding popu- ated by Emperor Napoleons, Queen RS, JARR was very angry M Again was Mr. Jarr late for dinner, and she said to him, “Well, this Is a nice time in the eve- ning to get home! I kept dinner wait- ing until it's all spoiled, and I've got @ headache.” It was not a nice time to come home, although Mrs. Jarr had said so, It was the very worst time, If a married man is going to be late he should be late good and plenty; then the lady of the house is so relieved to see her husband return safe and sound that her happiness and relief make her reproaches but perfunctory, Anyway, Mr. Jarr had a good excuse, and a grouch, too, “Do you think I miss my good din- ner and am flying all over this town asking favors of people and making & pest of myself, for my own sake, and much thanks I'll get?" asked he. The high prize of life, the crowning fortune of a man, is to be born to some pursuit which binds him in employment and hap- piness, whether it be to make baskets, or broadswords, or canals, or songs.—EMERSON, Dead Men’s Shoes By Sophie Irene Loeb Copyrigut, 1916, by The Prens Publishing Co. (The New York Evening World.) Sone men are born in dead men's; dency. Look at me. I was president 66 said the head polisher, ] “that President Wilson ts to lead the parade along Penn- sylvania Avenue on Flag Day,” “Peeu) ly enough,” remarked the laundry on “and may be because somebody thought of it, Flag Day ts the opening day of the Democratic convention in St, Louis,” « shoes, few achieve them while | of the Great Northern at thirty.” 4 4 eat Less be led many have them thrust upon], Bat & great lesson to be learned by rich men's sons, who know only them, This article is about one who|how to spend dollars, but who never has achieved dead men's shoes, earned one from the cradle to the He realized very early in life that grave. i It is the great American spirit of those who wait for dead men's shoes usually find they are misfits, ‘This self-reliance, independence, and man- hood that James J. Hill lett as the| is a case where the shoes do fit and|Sreatest Inheritance to bis son, and) don't pinch, Pretty soon these shoos will be lovingly laid aside in the hall tho fathers of sons. | Gone is the day when the big men| of world achievement and he will make new ones of his own, of the world will tolerate the drones | The man’s name is Louis W. Hill, in the bee-hive of life. He is a son of James J, Hill, who this They realize that nature intended each te work out his own salvation and to do his share in the world's work, week at the ripe age of seventy-elght| “and you, gentle reader, who pe died and left his work to be carried] onance pity: yourself, because you are on by this son, not advancing fast enough and earn- | ing little, reflect on the words of Louis Hill, They are fraught with encou: But doubtless his greatest useful- ness was in fitting that son for the y son's words a we ae expressed during th i Gugtit 10|ment While ever’ person can't he prove aw great incentive to every] railroad president he can bo self father who has hopes for his off-/made. He can learn to be satisfied spring, Mr, Hill says: with his small sulary until he earns | ng to be a self-made man in| the raise, spite of my father's standing, I got; He can go on despite seeming ob- $75 a month as a billing clerk five) stacles, knowing that contrary to the | rs after T left Harvard. [ didn't! cynics there are a jot of good men get much mora when [ omarried, 1) in world who seek reliable peop had to earn every raise L got Even They hiring them and n 6 two men working for! fring #8 Who get bigger 8} Ant vnge say, there are than Edo. thousands of such ) who are ready “Heing a railroad president isn't a}to say to you wh @ comes. sinecure, but it isn't a phenomenon as s J. Hill did n, "Well ther My — fat} ra.sed about done, my good and faithful servant, twenty-five railroad presidents, Iti thou hast been faithful over a few “as & poor quality man who stood by! 1)! to wil make thee ruter over James J, Hill and didn’t get @ presi. many.” The Jarr Family | because McCardell — Copyright, 1916, by The Press Publishing Co, (The New York Evening World.) “I'm sure you weren't running all over town asking favors of people and making a pest of yourself for my sake!" retorted Mrs. Jarr, Who's sake was it, then?” asked Mr. Jarr. “Didn't you ask me to get a position for Cora Hickett's brother? Didn't you say that Cora Hickett was the only person who ever did you any favors; that she was the only person who came to see the children when they were sick?" “L wouldn't have asked you to try) and get him a position if I had known you would come home and quarre! with me about it. Oswald Hickett at least is a gentleman. His nails are always nicely manicured and his clothes fit him perfectly, and he's got the nicest manners.” “Well, [didn't mean to be cross, my dear," said Mr, Jarr kindly, “But T have had a strenuous day trying to get him position, I have been out of the office all day, when my own work was pressing upon me, and have been going everywhere, asking everybody 1 know.” “We should do favors for our friends {f we expect our friends to do them for us,” said Mrs. Jarr, “L know that,” replied Mr, Jarr. “But you know as well as I do that Oswald Hickett is a cheap little dude, jas lazy as he can be and as silly and as supercilious as they make them.’ “Ah, but he's had a great lesson,” said Mrs. Jarr, “He's been out in the great world roughing it. He's been even to South America, working on a railroad, and that shows he has pluck.” “It does, does it?” remarked Mr, Jarr, “He hadn't pluck enough stay down there after he saw his work was in the commissary department, and that he was expected to put up sugar and coffee and give a hand when asked, same ship, and that friends, including myself, had got the position for him after any amount of trouble." “He'll do better this time, very ambitious,” sald Mrs, Jarr, “Well, I got him a position,” replied Mr, Jarr, “I spent the entire day getting it. He can go to work as a stock clerk with Rangle's fem, But I had to sweat my life away to his boss, telling him what a bright and industrious young man he is, The He's ‘place had been practically promised and he'll have | to another young man. to be on the job at § o'clock sharp, the firm discharged r stock clerk two days ago and they are badly in need of @ good man,” “That's so sweet of you!” said Mra, Jarr, kissing him, “Oswald will be , Grateful to you al the day: of Bia to} He came back on the| after all his| The Woman of It. By Helen Rowland. Copsright, 1916, by The Press Publishing Co. (The New York Evening World.) She Says ‘‘A Little Widow Is a Gullible Thing.” “ H, dear!) Why ore widows so gullible'” exclaimed the Wigew, | flinging down her newspaper with a gesture of impatienea an settling back among the cusiions of her porch chair. a Vision / | of fleecy pink and white ruffles, in a cool, green setting. | “Merey!" exclaimed the Bachelor, arching his eyebrows In “I thought they were the willest, most sophisticated creatures under admitted the Widow. “everybody thinks that! Every man looks | upon a widow as the original fox—and upon himself as the original coveted | grapes; whereas, as a matter of fact, widows are the original EASY MARKS | for any little fortune hunter who sets out to dupe them. Did ) of @ normal, intelligent spinster being swindled out of her moncy? Oh, not It |1s always the widow's mite that goes to swell the pockets of the fascinat adventurer, Johann Hoch and his kind have always just doted on widows and, now, here ts another bright young fortune hunter about to be deport |from England whose sole business has consisted in ‘swindling eligible widows.’ ‘business,’ ” protested the Buchelor deprecatingty, |. “I shouldn't call that a “I should call it a ‘pleasure, “There is some excuse for an inexperienced spinster being taken ta,” pursued the Widow, ignoring the flippancy. “But why should a WIDOW {trust men?” |. “Heaven knows!” sighed the Bachelor humbly. | "because nobody warns her against us.” | “That's just it! exclaimed the Widow emphatically, with a tap of her small bronze slipper. “Everybody takes a morbid interest in warning a spinster against the male sex, until, after twenty-five, she fs usually a tnindle of suspicions, surrounded by icicles, hut a widow ts supposed to be lable to look out for herself! Whereas, the shoe is on the other foot, The average spinster has had to battle with the world and look after her own [interests from girlhood, and naturally she knows how; but a widow has always been taken care of and coddled and looked out for, and doesn’t know enough, asa rule, to buy her own railway ticket and check her own trunks, | Besides, if she has had a kind, honorable man for a husband; ehe thinks all | the others are like him"— nd if she has an unkind, dishonorable one," put In the Bachelor, grime ning, “she thinks all the others are ‘different.’ * Yes," agreed the Widow, sorrowfully, “there {s no such thing as killing hope in the feminine breast! And it doesn't seem to make any difference whether widows are 'g or ‘sod,’ they are equally trusting and childish— \ the sweet, simple things! | ‘That's what makes them so fascinating!" declared the Bachelor gal- jantly. “Perhaps,” he suggested, errr errr Like Old Gloves, Widows Wear Comfortably. $ » and the Widow snapped her pink finger tips ainily. “Widows: y more fascinating than other women, They are just , that’s all! ler to talk to, easier to please, easier to to get along with, easier to understand, easier to When a man marries a widow, !t ten't #0 often wheedle, easier | boss and easier to fool! | because of a mad infatuation for her as because he happened to call on her jand found her easy to entertain, easy to flirt with and easily amused—and |so just kept on calling, until she became a ‘habit’ that he couldn't break away from.” “That's why a man marries ANY woman,” remarked the Bachelor pla- loldly. “But why do widows marry THEM? That's the mystery! There are |‘confirmed bachelor girls’ and ‘confirmed old maids,’ but there's no such |thing asa ‘confirmed widow.’ I wonder why?” | “Oh—'just because,’ gooste!" explained the Widow lucidly. “If she's [been happy, she wants to repeat her expertence, and be happy again; and |{f she hasn't—she wants to try again. “Hear! Hear!" cried the Bachelor, waving his cigarette, “A husband |te like a cocktail, If you never take the first one, you'll never mise aim. But if you take one, you always want another, and another, and"—= “Yes, they ARE so cinating.” interrupted the Widow dryly, “but PVE {signed the pledge! Still," she added with a sigh, “I'm gullible, just the same, | When a man tells me he loves me, I never doubt {t; and the way in which anned, would make an ostrich shudder, And eT wos born stupid—but just because I'm a widow, and— land used to being coddled and treated like a spoiled child.” “Bless its unsuspecting little heart!" murmured the Bachelor. “DID they flatter it, and deceive it, and try to marry it against ita will?” ' | 4 | { When tne Chase Ends, Then—-Surrender! GGA TO" rejoined the Widow emphatically, “not against its will, Because, when they STOP flattering and coddling and trying co marry me, 1 all cease being a widow, pledge or no pledge!” marry, Mr. Weatherby,” announced the Widow calmly. ‘better to lie a je than to suffer much,’ as the Japane: it is better to be deceived half the time than to be lo: “But, I tel! you," began the Bachelor pleading! | deceive"—— | "Go o: A little widow “Tt ¥ I'l NEVER said the Widow sweetly, isa gullible thing!” baa 3 me anything! I'll believe tt. The greatest error of our nature is not to know where to stop, not to be satisfied with any reasonable acquirement, not to com- pound with our conditions, but to lose all we have gained by an insatiable pursuit after more.—BURKE. The Month of Ju | HE first appearance of June in the fourth, and {t retained that position until Jullus Caesar reformed ne ions and attribute the name to the “Juntoribus,” the younger and inferi- or branch of the original Legislature of Rome, just as May was derived from the Majoribus, or rior the calendar. Romulus is said to have | branch _ given June thirty days, but Numa de- It seems appropriate that Jun prived it of one day, which was re- | stored by Julius Caesar, since which time it has remained undisturbed by calendar reformers. June is popularly supposed to have should have been dedicated to the Juniors, for it has always been a month sacred to love and marriage, and since the earliest times has been most popular month for the eele- bration of weddings. The old Ro- |been named after the buxom and|™mans held that while May wae the | beautiful Roman goddess Juno. while | Worst inonth of the year for contract- jothers attribute it to Junius Brutus, |!n&® matrimonial alliances, June wan \the First Consul, dnd from “jungo" | the very best and most favored by the (to join), with reference to the union | gods, especially if the day chosen of the Romans and the Sabines, Most | Were that of the full moon or the een- investigators dismiss all these suppo- | junction of the sun and moon, Facts Not Worth Knowing By Arthur Baer Copyright, 1916, by The Press Publishing Oo. (The New York Evening World.) NABILITY to perform on the harmonica dosn't prevent an alien from becoming a citizen of the United States, * At the present extravagant rate of consumption ul! ‘he bird seed in the world will be extinct by 3742, By putting broken glass and bottles on the top of a wall it is possible |to prevent potato bugs from clattering up and down and disturbing the neighborhood. Before being overtaken by the guards a Norwalk man succeeded in testing his non-sinkable rou boat with two holes in the bottom—one for the tater to run in and one for it to run out A debate between Winkus and Sloof Universities broke up in @ riot and three debaters were injured, The question was, “Resolved, shall shad- | roe be referred to as “it” or “they? In order to enable young men to save, a reformer wants Congress te pass a vill authorizing all silver dollars to be made with handles on ‘em, | —__—_—_. || go down and look the place over to oblige vou, but I couldn't make ny engagements this week. I Just got back in time for the squash tournam: at our College Fraternt., lite." t's.a good job; spleadid chance for promotion, firm, good pay," said Nn& enthused. Vi call 1p Oswald and tell him.” Mr, Jarr got young Hickett on the phone and joyfully broke the news. “To-morrow, did you say?” replied the young fellow. “Oh, I eay, old man, you shouldn't Rave been eo pre- cipitate. ties Club “What Jarr “Oh, squash!" cried Mr, “Where's my supper?” aid he say? asked Mm