The evening world. Newspaper, August 7, 1914, Page 12

‘Sketches and Ride Home I MIGHT-A ToRe A HOLE IN MY NEW WAITH'T INTHTEAD UV MY THITIN Te6LaD } DIDNT HAVE >My" THLEEVE oown. JUST WAIT- AN OPTomIST WILL SEE SOME LUCK EVEN sy In SKINNED ELBOW-WAIT on’t Be Any Crows in Pa’s Garden! By Thornton Fisher - seen d - Y'see TH BROS WAS PLANIN’ HAVOC WITH TH GARDEN Batitaw Sut Some OF PN OLD BUDS. ACOH ve DEY and AXEL—Now, Will Flooey B AWAL , (UNtT CRA To MEET lll Mp see fiocey ! ay even “MALE UP” MY FACE TO: Look ciIKE HIS ‘ FYA WANT ANcTHER. IMPORTANT Ls «8 as arts toot ia cone on Loow AT Hie “fLt SEND PACS EYL THINK He SCREBN,So DRESS UP | Hea YER Room: (78 You FALLING OFF a “We Cire! AXEL EXACTLY LIKE You See Hm: ean ie Gaiet IN AN’ Look TALLER! Aunience Catr ‘discussion of it by non-combatants ia hereby voted $3.50 to get he perapective motorboat in commis- Clem Plunkett, of Dry Poad didn’t have no news for us to-day, He gan Mr. Jarr. ESI Sh Boas Darr feally Bb by BovienaGancelD Res New Yortxrestag’ Word )* , BVEN THE JARRS DN’T STAY “NEUTRAL.” H, dear, it's dreadful!’ whimpered = Mrs. looking up from the eve- ning papers. “All thie 4 ‘war news covering all the #1 one doesn’t know where to Sk for the society news or births, and marriages!” yes, I suppose it's too bad it the newspapers give up publish- the society doings just to print opening incidents of what Is u the greatest death stru: the nations that th ever known!” retorted Mr. Jarr tly. “I don't mean that at all; you know Zam trying to say!" Mrs. Jarr om. “I'm sure war is a dreadful and maybe it was fortunate we "t afford to go to Europe this and take the children, T have been frightened to death Just wo worried I would have been wreck !f we had been held and our touring automobile from us to find that although had travellers’ checks for thou- ef dollars we couldn't buy a with the: ‘9 your 1” asked Mr. » “We wouldn't have had any ie and all the money 4 have bad wouldn't have mad difference one way or another, Ob, I wish you wouldn't be so itter-of-fact.” Mrs, Jarr declared. nothing at least a 96 tainge they might “Phere you go!” cried Mra, Jarr. “You won't even let me have what I'd like to have even if I w 10 lowe it! If I think I might have had a] p) trip to Europe only to be worried and alarmed and suffer annoyance id _privation, and then say, ‘Well, hing happens for the best!" {t doesn't happen, you scowl at me just because I do have that Uttle happinesg being unhappy be- m unhappy that we poor that we are fortunate In not going throu we might hav 1 You get me know what I “Weill, that's the reason one can- “That 18 no excuse for a war. Any not rejoice that we did go abroad | differences could have been talked over and get caught in a war, I do hope|and adjusted in a the nations who ARE fighting will| explained Mrs, Jair re is noth- old wara at home. It|ing worth auarrelling about! I have nice state of affairs it to put up with things fram you"—— Great Scott! YOU put up with things from ME?" asked Mr. Jerr. “Why, I've just been letting you walk I'm like in this country? that got tired of being down to ey y on the farm till the| ‘‘Bul ? cried Mrs, Jarr. though I hate the farm ey! ae 40 the bullying! Dont d Uncle Henry WILL NOT put|to me fanning water inthe Kitchen, to say |1 hate And Mrs, Jarr throw nothing of a bathroom, Oh, dear,|down the paper and walked out of isn't war dreadful!” “Tt is and as for your old war, the room. “Yes, it Is .a setback to progress, an indictment of civilization,” re- jarr solemnly, don't go talking that Oop: kings and emperora had just set i talked it over. Why should fight any more than Indl- viduals?” : who don't know what they are dis- | nesses, many constant irritations,” be- | cussing!" Copyright, WAR EXTRY!!! HE war spirit ris in Hickville yeatidday as e@oon as the daily matl brought Fara Hick’s city paper, which he read the headlines of out loud to the nine populaces gathered in ILLUSTRATING WEBSTER it, 1014, by the Pres Publishing Co, (The New York Evening World.) BIEMAN , LET’S DO THAT MAXIXE WHERE YOU WHIRL THE LADY AROUND!! ~Frann 1. Staaten - ... HYSTEROGENIC PRODUCING HYSTER/A*—VWeb: sion, and is appointed commander- Hickville Doings From Our Hickville Correspondent Hazen Conklin 1014, by the Prem Publishing Co, (The New York Evening Wortd,) in-chief of the naval Preserves, consistin’ of hiaself and Willie Oates, with sealed orders to pa- trol all waters of the Tannery Pond on the lookout for a horatile Neet of invasion. HIPPOLYTE HARKNESS, Town Clerk. HOBEA TITCOMB, Beelectman, SETH SHUTES, Conatabule. NATHAN SCALEB, Juatice of the Peace. LAFE JOHNSON, Poundmaater. PELEG PEEKS, Postmaster, TOBIAS TIVVINS, Chairman of the School Board. PERSONALS AND LOCALS. EN BBLLOWS, our lusty blacksmith, {is eatin’ his meals offen the kitchon shelf, he havin’ careleasly turned his back to one of Gideon Spriggses mules to pick up a shoe offen the floor, HOW YOU the P, O. A committee composed of our official citizens met later in Bemis Bros. back room and drawed up the followin’ proclamation, to wit: “Whereas, because of and for inatante Germany havin’ declared war again’ most of the world ex- ceptin’ the U. 8. and Hickville, be it proclaimed that Hickville will maintain its atrickt neutrality at all costs, Should any of them Germs fly over Hickville in dirge- able bdalloona Constabule Seth Bhutes, having deen mobilized, ts to bring it to earth with his truaty asiz-shooter, only in the event of the Germs firat demolish- in’ him with a bomb. Bid Forsythe FELT—- Copyright, 110, Presa Pubiioning Cw (80 Bromma Wertay says as how there'll be some to-! od row, howsomedever, if anythin’ turne up betwixt now and then. Them city folks, name ot Hall, who bought the old Spooner farm to make &® summer home outen, had a crate vf eggs to come from the city ree. The only way you kin git fresh egys here is to buy them in the bity, folks hereabouts ship all the Trade ones there, Aunt Jane Taggart like to of ha@ a serious accident to happen yesth- day. Only it didn’t, #0 there ain't no use tellin’ what it waa. Mr. and Mrs. Dud Cooke and@ infast darter, Natalie Josephine, of y Ridge, 1s figurin’ on movin’ to Hiek- ville. Who saye Hickville ain't a growin’ town? Here are two sneers, encered Amps Crepe, our lokal tnester A be ‘ou can’t expect to eat mental gree apples Without aufferin’ mental orempe. I reckon they say love ts “only @ dream” because 60 many folks 0 (tou their eves shuts ne # ' ——>—_—_. Worth Knowing. HE editor of the Evening was deeply engrossed in work, when he was ud interrupted by the office boy, who wx e, “Fetch him in,” aatd ¢ A “If we can find out how ne doen run the