The evening world. Newspaper, May 5, 1914, Page 18

A Page of Comics, Sketches and Stories 4 WERE Weve BEEN IN MEXKO NO FIGHTING YET, A WEEK AND WE GOTTA TAKE SOME KIND OF MoviES oR WELL GET caclen BACK To WEW York ! wHy CANT Mou “Film” some oF Gee FeR Sox! WHAT THA Booce 1S THE POOR SIMP DOING 2 THERE'S No Swert BUILDINGS IN THis STREET HACIENDO AQUIT ESTA t] Por'LaMoR DE 1 miever ! vara tf SURE 1 CAN RUN IT IVE BEEN TAKING LESSONS! gave fam! «By Rov Mardell % 214, Brews Publishing Co, 44 Coreg Nis Peek Brealne Worl °° THE “SIGN OF DISTRESS” LIBERATES MR. JARR. “De gemman been =) SSH porte! very excited and he's done fell into inconsclous- said the Pullman ess. Mr. Jarr interlaced his fingers across his chest as the Pullman por- ter tucked the blanket tight around He also closed his eyes and “Frade himself as righ! as possible, as ¥ porter and the driver and ambu- ince surgeon from the Peekskill "a Ital lifted him out of the lower . and siid him skilfully into a Bieeses Then they bore him out i the car and to the Peekskill sta pr Sy platform nearby, where the am- Mlance waited. » Mhere was no sight or sound from / the militant huntress of human vul- (fures as the procession passed down the ais!) of the car by her curtained Werth. Evidently she rested secure | im the thought that the human vul- ture she had handcuffed could not es- cape her. But he had, Mr. Jarr was ‘put in the ambulance ind the train ‘was speeding New York, “Out of the frying pan into the fire!” murmured Mr. Jarr, "“Eacap Ing fre jail to get sto the hoepital But just then the ambulance gave a “wwerve and his bindcuffs clinked un- der the blankets. The young sawbon riding at throug of Peekskill and puffing c smoke Into the face of the sup patient did not stir at the mur italic sound. He only thought of tho instruments clinking dm bls Kit of curgeon's tools Iy¢ in the bottom of the ambult On and on the ambulance swerved and speeded, tearin with bell clanging, eral carly narrowest margin. and swore as the citizens dodged him, for he was an experienced ambulance driver of many years’ he always liked to come back to the hospital with a wagon full of injured persons. With a aroun ut missing kskill citizens by the The driver cursed standing, and the ambulance-—which date auto brick Institution, out of the pla stretcher and Mr r Mr. Jarr and turned | alco ambula a corner on two wheels and skidded into the courtyard of a great the ttle and a banging of the was an turned Jarr inside, ion ward rintendent pulled the a strong electric Hight into hin eyes, ILL BETCHA! aim | BETCHA ME KID SISTER WEIGHS MORE 'N ILL BETCH houre “Mr. Jimpson of Buffalo?" he asked. But he asked it in the tone one em- ploys when he does not expect a re- ag So Mr. Jarr made none. “Where js the male nuree that was looking after this case?" added the man in cha “Nurae, find out where this man’s orderly ie!" The nurse had no time to any inquiries, for the ambulance surgeon came in at this point. “Wasn't anybody with the case that the ambulance surgeon reported. “The Pullman porter didn't seem to know anything about it, and an the telegram only said to get the case, why, I only got the case.” “He's got handcuffs on him!” aid the house surgeon. “Why didn't they use a atraitjacket?” “He's a fine looking rum! If he starta any violence here he'll get the water cure, all right!" eneered the ambulance surgeon, The telegram sald it waa a mild case of mania portu,” remarked the bulance surgeon, with lota of dough! If tt was a poor guy they'd say ‘Jim-jams!'" “If he was a poor guy he wouldn't be nent to a private sanitarium for holies,” replied the head doctor, For alcoholica?” asked Mr, Jarr, eitting up. For goodness’ sake, get a fellow a drink! If you knew what I've been through you'd bring it running! And it file and take off these Mr. eyes, id they send you here for? You aeem nearly normal.” “It was done on a bet,” said Mr, lod ‘Wok, or Married Men’ Association,’ gives a be to-morrow night in New have bet a brother in the order I will not mias being present. He bet me I wouldn't be sober enough. 80 to pre- vent me attending he had me doped, handcuffed and sent here, thinking you wouldn't believe my story.” "Give the jatress, brother,” said the hot rgeon. Mr, Jarr gave the thirst sign ‘he Sheltering Order of Wok-Wol a pantomimic indication that hought hi surgeon. dinner in New York togethe: get a handcuff master key. find a couple on the keyboard out- side the violent ward.” May 5. 1914 TAINT THE ENGINE- THATS) GOIN’ LIKE A MACHINE GUN! “Why didn't you eay so? | LT ier" HE more money a man has the more ways his women- folks figger out for him to When a feller's poor they are always think- in’ “Can we affor. to have it?" but when he's rich they change their tune to “Can we afford not to have spend it. Mrs, Carrington Bruce called Ma up last Friday and said they was goin’ out to their summer place on Long Island Sound to start gettin’ {t ready for the summer. “Tt would be fun,” she just you folks and us to ma ‘week-end party of it. the caretaker and his helpers t now, of course, but I can send some | of the servants out ahead of us to have everything ready.” Ma said sho thought It would be| fine, and so did Clarice, said she hoped the things on her list front. to cost me, near as I Kubliaiog ve, us I'd allus thought o} a little story-and-a bedrooms. in up at Dobbinavill Soap became a good Mra, Carrington Bruc “cottage” I had somi pictured out. tage,” then an ordinary nothin’ but a dog-kennel, out in one of their autom vip, Slzed house that would be 110F | in Dobbinsville make a little | “hata a nice place," I but I guess when you Mrs. Bruce laughed. there wouldn't any war start up before we go: back, because she hadn't finished gettin’ Higgins to take with him to the Well, we went, and the trip is goin’ $300,000, which ts goin’ some, “cottage” as if frame house, with a little porch and two uptairs The kind we used to Ii ppeore Dobbins But {f their country house is a “cot- came to two big stone posts and a driveway, with big trees all around, and a little ways back was a good. only we turned In between tho posts, Some bigger'n I thought it would |pany you fil It up all right. Fun for the Home and the Ride Home Sopp tight, 1916, Wiens Publishing Co (NY Evening Word) By Vic AY TRIED To FiLm ONE OF DAS BEAUTIES - BuT HER HUSBAND BANE GOT map Wt CJ EXCUSE ME FOR’ BUTTIN' IN MISTER BUT You FORGOT TO RELEASE TH’ BRAKE . though spe | maya lookin’ at it carciess like, “that's! be| where our caretaker lives. Our cot- tage is half a mile away yet.” And so it was. We went through a regular park and came finally to the top of a@ little hill, Then Mr. Bruce had the chauffeur stop the car and there was Long Island Sound spark- lin’ in the sun. Between us and the water was a whoppin’ big house, all spread out and surrounded by smaller buildin’s, takin’ up all of an acre. guess there ain't many summer hotels much bigger or grander, “That's our place,” he says, eweep- in’ his arm. ‘Well, it made a great impression on ma, and Sunday she made the Bruces take us over to look at the next estate, which Bruce said was for n't 1-2-3 and a basket of shucks to his, but it was grand enough at that for anybody. There wasn't near so mich land and the “cottage” was ema! or, only about as big as three ora: “ry churches “f heard,” ie says, “that the place can be bowe.s. for $300,000 spot cash, ‘Ma has decided for me to buy It. The agent is comin’ to see me to- morrow, “If we're goin’ to be anythin’ in the social world,” says Ma, "we've got to have a summer estate, We can't af- ford not to." I've got my own ideas on the @ub- Ject, but they don't count, : ————.__ Kept on “Layin’.” NTHONY COMSTOCK at @ luncheon in New York sald of certain tabooed books and for Charlie can figger, plays: “The motive of these works was per- haps all right. But the expression, the form, was bad. And that spoiled the motive completely. “Expression, form, you know, is everything. Consider how the lack of it spoiled the mason’s speech. “A mason at a memorial service sald of a bricklayer who had been ac+ cidentally killed: “‘Yes, gents, | looked out once on the beauties of nature, and all wi m. Our friend, deceased here, w: layin’ a brick. I looked out once again, and still all was ca’m, but our friend, deceased, oO imore, Hey’ was layin’ Washingtoit Herald. house ain't obiles. We @ mansion says when was a corpse.’ have com- “Oh,” she ae — u wa a wey suet) —— an HELP HER ON < AFORE THA CENT bs GOES CHUB NOW, * WHATS SHE WEIGHS Jal Thin People SKS Can Increase We'ri:! HEY, YA “ Losr, va , LosT Ya, GOT Ti SuvtTEes ‘Ya Gor t pounds ave fae atiewine ple, And, ‘des ee” 8 Sargo!_ do. f ' ats | what t Droduclng