The evening world. Newspaper, April 24, 1914, Page 28

1ET ME Go, J] TétL You, If Axel Goes to Mexicn He Wants to Come Back A WHADOYA, KNOW ABOUT THIS, AXEL? THe FLICKER FILM ComPAny” ts /- GONNA SEND ME AN’ You DOWN “DO MEXICO To “TAKE MOVING PICTURES OF “THE wan! AINT THAT GREAT 2 Now GET READY - we Star mMonpay ! ol | Fine! rgets That “Absence Makes the Heart Grow Fonder”! Conyright 914 Pret Publiphine Co UN Y Brewing Weeks R-t-t-e-e-e-venge! | ‘TB going to be war to thy knife,” declared the suburban| man, who was feoding b Money Didn’t. GUEST was expected for din her, and Bobby had recelved five cents aa the price of his chickens, | sttence during the meal. He was “What now?” asked the friend. ulet as @ mouse until, discovering “Why, Blinke nent ine 4 box of axle) that his favorite dessert was bein grease and advised me to use it on| served, he could not longer curb his my lawn mower.” enthusiasm, He drew the coin from Nepel?” his pocket and, rollini table, exclaimed: ‘Here's your nick- el, mamma. I'd raiher talk.”—Pitte- burgh Chronicle-Telegraph, T sent it back and told him wi to use i fe daughter's voice,.”-- across the | s01 GET YouR EQuiPMeNT TO6ETHER, AND Come INTO THE OFFICE. “THE Boss WANTS To GWE US OUR. INSTRUCTIONS Covert Now Fork Hreisa Word A MATTER OF BERTHS: ONE LOWER, ONE UPPER. “ C This gentleman did not answer Mr. Jarr, for he waa busy at the telephone having a violent quarrel with some female per- mn at the other end, for the ticket agent was impudent, sarcastic and scathing, without being profane, over the telephone. ‘Sure, there's a lower berth, one Just como in, that was reserved,” sald the ticket agent, when he had ceased his acidulated repartee over the AN I get @ lower berth?” asked Mr. Jarr of the sleeping car ticket agent. front bars of his cage. “Anyway, I “I was kidding the part; the ticket agent. " my advice and mind your own business 1 matter af these travelling p: You've got a lower berth and got an uppe let it "I think you are very offic replied Mr. Jarr_ hotly. wasn't in a hurry to make trip to be back in time for a beef. steak dinner, [d"— “Tell your troubles to the detecta- phone," bald the ti ‘agent blithely and he pulled down a ground glass window shutting off the interior view of his cage completely. yonrs insulting the travelling publ had given the sleeping car ticket Agent every advantage of paraphrase over Mr. Jarr, and that gentleman, annoyed at being bested as a senior wrangler, so to sp k, pounded at the window in baffled rage until the his abraded knuckles be made to tauat {t upom bis re ee See et a You Must REALIZE FLOOEY, “THAT IN GOING DowN Te - MEXICO To FILM THE WaAR- You ARE SURE To MEET WITH GREAT DANGERS! Forcex tr! ME AN'AXEL AINT AFRAID OF A Few MEXICANS ! Ithere WAS a lower « the lower berth Maybe he ldn't reserve any- \ GUESS | NEVER “TOLD ‘You AXEL Used To B& A GREAT PRIZE FIGHTER , bID 1? WHY HE DON'T KNow WHAT Fearn IS Yo ue used To UAE RIGUT IN WITHOUT EVEN PROTESTING HimceELe! erth, she shall awaking to find an inquest being held hat—what is it? Is it my turn ing for her going out of the Grand | to speak?" asked Mr, Jarr, sitting up, tral when she was only getting and, of course, le," suggested the | as at Poyghkeo mniductor. will gj hand * sauied the lady ill tal he would seo that the lady, got the upper should get the! acre Io ; When the train started he consult- ed the Pullman conductor and that official consulted his diagra “Phere isn't any lady in t who has an uppei conductor, t the lady and mornii the berths now, a when we reach Poughkeepsie and”. y for than} your section, and that’s been taken Poughkeepsie, Yes, it's in a lady’ name, That must be the party you heard telephoning to ‘ “It must have been, a Mr. Jarr. “And just for the way he acted to the lady over the phone—or, rather, Just for the way he talked to her— 1 wish ous in the matte 5 1 take the upper the lady can have mine, the lowe: when the train re anony: said, sle Mr dy SAFETY FIRST SAH-H-He ANYBODY 4ISTENING? T WANT TO TAKE ger ERE, LIGHTNING, EARTH= » BURGLARY, ACCIOENT, HAI. AND LE INSURANCE’ ON Tang ANCE Fontes Gave Aan bias my he uppe wlahad Jarr. “There y to the weaker ‘ou say, sir,” said the con- “It will be miduight when Wo get to Poughkeepsie, but I'll tell} you’ thank you tn the ter i making up am not doing this simple Uttle interrupted Mr ream 1 dong It for to remain|"She says she explicitly ordered an But, aw 1 berth and Fonenkeeges es Poughkoepati When the train reached Poughkeep- arr, who had just gotten to] the fron-jawed woman. und refused her a lower berth, when! slumberland, was made aware of it by| ways to be their parasites? bumping hin head nat some brasn fixing near the roof of the car. He had just been dream- ing he was at tho beofateak dinner Yj) given in his honor and every time the toastmaster, who was none other than Gus, the cafe proprictor, introduced a speaker he struck Mr. Jarr over the head with the bung starter that he wos using aa a gavel. “Get out of my bert! How dare cried a harsh female voice, And Mr. Jarr looked over the edge of the berth through the ourtains to 4 you'll be asleep|see the porter, the conductor, and a 1, iron-Jawed lady down in tl won't take the lower rth, al explained the conductor. upper berth by telephone from ut @ can have my lower bert! began Mr. Jarr. | “How dare you, sir!” interrupted ‘Are we ‘Their fostered playthinga?. Their petted, Pampered dolls? Get out of my up-/ per berth! I always travel an upper berth, How dare you interfere |in'the affairs of a feminist?” T was nothing to de but eur- render and come down. ‘Mr. Jarr wired an apology to the ticket seller at daybreak. And he also sat up all night in the emoking compartment. Getting Even. YOUNG marriéd couple of Bal- timore recently had @ dispute concerning the biacult served for breakfast. The husband offered | certain tart observations touching his wife's culinary ability, referring, of| course, to the “kind that mother used lly moved the wife to ac- the result that the next 9 act before the complatn- me thing. "Now you've hit it!” exclaimed he after disposing of one biscuit, “These blacuits are exactly like the sort my mother used to make. How did you happen to hit upon the recipe? “Tam happy to inform you,” eald his wifo, with glittering eyes, “that I employed oleo for butter, used cold storage eggs, dropped a bit of alum in the flour and adulterated the milk. Remember, sweetheart, that mother lived before the enactment of the i Food law."—Baltimore Ameri- Fun for the Home and the Ride Home o - By C. M. Payne I Don't sft& NO SENSE IN VELL- ay BANE.) READY “To START! [e * 1 SHOULD WORRY, HELL HAVE TO GOD MEXICO iy LORE FTA TUL BET NEVER, THOUGHT OF fare His Big Mistake. HE apoplectic little man pounded the counter with his apoplectie| 4, any potatoes? Think carof Uttle fist, says the Indianapolis | now.” bit his mustache until the blood cams He consulted the list in his hand, Star. “T never dealt here before and I'll never deal here again!" he shouted. management here Is rotten. You have nothing, nothing! I'll try once more. Have you any tomatoes? “No, sir; sorry, sir,” replied the| clerk. “What? Not even in cana?” “Not even in bottles," The apoplectic little man crushed his hat down further on hia head and “Not @ potato in the place,” said the clerk apologetically uy 1 Well, I'll give you one I'd like to see the end you any sugar?” “Not @ grain, sir, Sorry, sir.” The apoplectic little man sat down on a stool and lot his list flutter to the floor. “And you call this @ grocery store?” he sald tauntingly. “No, alr,” corrected the clerk mildly. “This'is a cigar store.” The apoplectic ttle man rolled off the stool In a fit. “RED MAN DUNWOOD A New RED-MAN Collar style for Spring and Summer. 2 for 25 cts. EARL & WILSON MAKERS OF TROY’S BEST PRODUCT DUNWOoOD “I'll give you another chance! aa i ’ iy q]