The evening world. Newspaper, December 3, 1913, Page 21

this preposterous stuff and by his sense of comedy he succeeds at times in giv- ing the stepfather a humorous twist. But this is largely a manner of his Ger- man dialect, which he forgets only when he rises to the dignity that the head of the house is supposed to possess. ‘The humor of the authors {s so strained that without his dialect Mr. Mann would be lost in the evening and frock coats he wears so industriously. If he could only get away from his tailor and the “Ceule Mann ae George Raimund, ready-made playa that have become the AWW, THATS TOO BAD. You MUSTN'T Loon Bact THAT WAY Loon AT PoP. HE AND STARING AT THINGS But ° Fairy Tales for Grown-Ups ISNT ALWAYS TURNING “~~ FACE To THA FRowtune 1—The Queen and the Dragon “ong | Tee Per ie We New York Evening World, By Eleanor Schorert err sLieLecnonaanteewal Make the “How do you ti is “When I hawe indigestion I take two tadlespoontule of the jutes after meat, and occasionally tetween meals {€ J feel uncomfortable 4n average Pmeappie will yield more than Aalf @ pint of Juice, and the best way to pre Dare it 1s to pare the pine with a sharp knife, carefully remove the eyes and then shred it with a sliver fork. Put a Uttle sugar on it to draw out the juice Your Drug Store By Andre Dupont. Kitchen A e SHRED WwrtH &AFORK and then put it away for two or three hours in the refrigerator unti! all the julee has had time to collect. CapyAight, 1018, by The Prem Publishing Co, (‘The New York Bening Werld), | 2.—PINEAPPLES INSTEAD OF PILLS AND POTIONS. ; 66 HM, dear! Where on earth did [ put it?" sald the Club Women busting } O frantically through her handbag. | “Anything f can tend you?” politely inquired the Commuter's Wife, i who wee absorbed in an advertisement of u bargain sale | BY CHARLES DARNTON. “Not unless you have a dyepepsla tablet handy.” | . “Sorry, ° . We don’ ch medic HADES of Tursenev! Hin “Fathers and Children” may. have inapired “ctu: eat Rouse, Foe all simple aliments we wishe the Lltshen the ging deter nas S dren of To-Day,” but the play by Clara Lipman and Samuel Shipman, in “How do you do thi I've taken #0 many pills and potions lately that which Louls Magn tries to prove that a stepfather {s the noblest work of the they seem to have los thelr effect.” Rane cannot be cémpared with anything Russian, or, for that matter, any- “I used to feel that way too, before Qing human. my attention w lied to the effect of Can you imagine a middle-aged mother begging her children, @ snip of a «irl certain foods, I had Indigention all the and a dood of a boy, to call her mother while they persist in not only calling time, which made me perfectly miser- hee by her first namo but reducing it to slang that t» enough to turn her hair able, I believe our doctor gave me 4 > wom gray: to white? Then, too—and this is really good enough to print—she ts everything in the pharmacopela. At last scokled for having gone to see "The ene day, more to get rid ef me than } Easiest Wa‘ ind warned that she ts anything else | think, he sald ‘Go not to entertain her Nfelong suitor home and eat a pineapple’ ] without a chaperon, She has to ‘Qh, doctor!’ I exeleimed tm horror. “slope” with him to outwit these in- ‘Be will kill me! : sufferable brats, and then when thair “No, tt wii do you @ great deal of amazingly courageous stepfather sends G00d tf you take only the jules.’ them to bed without their dinner they “Aad then he expletned that the pine- leave home and mother and plan to apple contained pow |igeative run off to Paris, the girl with a Futurist agent in tte alee, axa iy ar the | Painter who deserves to be boiled In oil, aré and fibrous portions of the pulp the cub with a French lady whose life whieh made it 1 tried the fan't exactly an open book. Presertption and ' — Cheerfully, even smilingly, Mr. Mann Rave been wu @oea his dest to make something of tule with him how thankful we should de, for here without doubt ts the funniest tric comedian in this country, onewho could keep 1 house in shouts of laughter simply by turning his pecuilarly in@fvidual talent into its natural course, He looks remarkably well in the play @t the Harris Theatre, his new. curling wig giving his face an almost bovis! ‘CE upon a time there lived in Babylon a very beautiful and very unhappy queen. The king, her husband, whom she loved dearly, was the cause of all her sadness, Often would he sit with fury on his brow, saying strange and terrifying things, Indeed, so dreadfui were his ear, that the king stormed thus, To Dan Cupid, Lord of Love, went the queen and earnestly begged assistance. Jnbolt those doors of fear with which you seek to guard against this menace—Jeslousy,” Cupid advised. “Fling wide the portals of your home “Yea; I'm sure it will Relp you. And if you would only use certain @imple foods t I] minor tlle instead of ao much medicine I think you would be blessed with the effect. But £ haven't told you all the pineapple is @ood for. The julee fa an excellent remedy for s eore throat, etther usea as a gargie or ewalowed appearance. And he does succeed in putting a great deal of good nature into his role, though it is not until the last act, when he sits on a trunk with the French siren and resists temptation by attending strictly to the business of his checkbook, that he has a scene which gives him any real opportunity, In spite of tho play and @ company that {s most distinguished for its ability he scores a bersonal success. To put It gently, “Children of To-Day" should be spanked, for, fudged even ‘as farce—the authors probably consider it satire—it is quite impossible, Betty Vincent's Advice to Lovers his ravings that the terrified queen feared much for his sanity. One day she found the real reason for the king’s sad state. In a dark cave hard by dwelt an uncouth and green-eyed monster who had the magic power, to make himself invisible if he chose and was able to enter the most securely fortified castle at will. It was at such times as this demon invaded her home, making himself invisible to her while he crawled up behind the king's chair and whispered unheard of injustices concerning the queen into Where There’s a Will (Copyright, 1912, by Bobbs-Merrill Co.) but the lump in my throat seemed to Best Age to Marry. Tt fs hard to HAT is the best age for marriage? #0 much on locality, bringing-up and other indt- vidual factors, But I think {t 1s generally admitted that neither young men nor young women should marry be- fore the age of twenty-one. In New York, at any rate, they are legal children until they have attained their twenty-first birthday, On the other hand, If two persons are sure that the: care for each other, | see no reason why they should wait until the first fine years of maturity are spent. ‘The sooner they marry, assuming that both are of an fe to undertake the responsibilities of married life, the more years of happiness they will have together. Reasons of finance or of fami are rarely; of sufficient !mportance to warrant years of separation lege to Mx the date of her wedding, and can only try to persuade her to meet your views, ve known @ about a year and am edout to pay’ my first call, Would it be appropriate for me to bring a box of candy with me Batirely appropriate, though not neces- oary. am in love with a is friendly to me 1 [never seem to get the chance to talk with her for any length of time. How can I win her favor and spend more time in her company?” ‘ Why don't you write and ask her if you can call? After a Quarrel. “H, E." writes; ‘I recently quar relied with a young man, but I care for him and I know he loves me, We are barely on speaking terms at pr What would you advise me to do’ You were probably partly to blame for the quarrel, and I don’t see why you shouldn't apologize for your share in it ©." writes: “I am seventeen years old and @ young man has asked me to scoompany him to a dance. He is pay- ing attention to my sister, so would it be cight for me to go out with him slower” Don't go if you think your sister's fealings would be hurt. BL.” writes: “Which Is whem @ young man and a youn, are walking on the main street the taay take the arm of the gentleman correct pet ogplnrned He will doubtiess meet you ha!f way. @Bither practice is rather unsophistl- — cated, * 8. writes: "LD recently met a girl ey jand we feil in love at ‘lyst sight OL." writes: “fam very much In|invited me to call on her. What lowe with a young lady and ashe has to marry ine, but she is always! putting off the date, What ehall 7 do, as I deed that I cannot live without her” Be fe always a be a suitable pre to take her?’ Don't take anything more than cand. vr flowers, necessary to accompany oung woman's priviel with any gift, porate and {t ts not the first call @ELF-SUSTAINED HUMOR A CIRCUMSTANTIAL EVIDENCE Mow 4d Horium get b's reputation ag You know your lessons to-day,” said @ @oonteur? His stores ure not amus-/ the head of the team acousingly end he doesn't tel) them very wel Yoa, captain.” ja, But he can tough at them in al "Well, let it pass thie time, but it that makes hin wound Like @ crow.” |looke ae if you were neglecting your jaablagion sian, footbadl"—Washingten Hera, have gone to any chest, The doctor helped me along, for the snow was drift- ing, and when he saw I was past the crying stage he went back to what wo SYNOPSIS OF PRECEDING CHAPTERS, ‘ Yd Doctor,” owner of @ mineral spring sanatorium, dies, leaving the establishment to bis Scanegrace en Disk ‘on condition that Dick take charge of tie place ‘within one. week therrane oot one Eatin, were hoth thinking about. gat Emo) mint aU cannot Ne found, “Old Pierce is right," he sald. “Re- nie, the red haire! girl in-charge uf the spring : i ot! house (who tell the story), te ginch worred er Member, Miss Minnie, I hosing is absence, ' worried over the ap: you or your mineral spring; in riage of P nacbing batty Gennings, one of the I'm strong for you both, But Feary eye! 8, rte aale lsarse while I'm out of the ring now for goo’, ‘week ‘ol ‘end that Dic iy ry ey on a ein with ‘a’ pretty wick I don't mind saying to you what 1 sald Mian Pierce comes to the sanatorium through a olay nd indice fim to #ay for @ senate Dick, taking lishment unfil the to Plerce—that the only thing that gets into training here, as far as 1 can see, is a fellow's pocketbook.” ‘e went back to thi atralghtencd the news sta King having taken a violent toot As A rewult of the excitement. The Je ningses wero packing to go, and Miss Summers had got a bottle of peroxide time and imper- charge of the whole estab- oir arrival, He installs au as house doctor, inthe nae theese nl Dick and his. bride. t 9 eloped with Patty Jennings's school’ anie feduces them to hide in a de. h.“They arrange to stay there for the an actreas, who is suing mers, bak promine, “comes io the mms; and shut ‘herself in her room. At & Von frince, under the “inwaentte! © o'clock ‘Tillle beckoned to me from the feral quarrel between Pleroe @oor of the officers’ dining roon aud The latter leave the sanatoriam said whe'd pul the basket In the snow by tho grape arbor, I got ready, with a heavy heart, to take it out, I had for- gotten all about thelr dinner, for one thing, and I had to carry bad news CHAPTER XXII. (Continued,) But Mr. Pierce had been there before Home to Roost. me. T saw tracks in the fresh snow, ELL, we went out and 1 touk fT praise heaven! it had snowed all that week and our prints were filled up the path | knew best, whte A GUE Brin were AVSE. YR as out toward almost as in sight, The place lu wild state of excitement. Mra, D lonely, with the trees hung With her cheeks Mushed, had gath vith snow and arching over the board all her things on the cot and was roll- walk, At the Httle bridge over the Sng them up in sheets and newspapers reek Dr, Barnes stopped and, leaning But Mr. Dick was sitting on the box in nver the rail, took a good look at me. front of the fire with his curly hatr “When you self-contained women go standing every way. He had to p he said, “you pretty near roasting potatoes, and as T opened the do to he picked one up and poked at it eo it smash, don't you? You look as if you'd @ death tn your family,” was done. This was my family,” I half sniv- “D-—n'" he sald, and Aropped tt elled. Mra, Dick ast on the cot rolling up a “Hut. he said, “you'll be getting mar- pink ribbon and looked at him. red and having a home of your own “If you want to know exactly my rea and forgetting all about this.” son for insisting on moving to-night, I'll He looked at me with lis sharp eyes, tell you," she said, paying no attention ‘There's ably some nice chap 1M to me. “It 4s your disposition.” He didn't say anything, but he put his foot on the potato and smashed it. “If Thad to be shut in here with you one more day," she went on, “I'd hate you. he asked, I shook my head, I had Just caught sight of the broken pieces of the Moody water pitcher on the ice below. “No nice young man! he remarked, “Not the telegraph operator, oF the fel- low who runs the livery stable—I've for- gotten his nam: "Look here," T Why the one more day?" without looking up But she didn't answer him &he was In the worst kind of a teinper, whe threw turned on him, ‘if | you're talking all til# nonsense to keep the rinbon down, and, coming ov fed my mind off things, you needn't.” the lid of my basket and looked im. ‘tm not,” he said. "I'm asking for “Iam again!’ she excla ungra | the sake of my own mind, but we'll not full, anks 8 Mh reme i hother about that now, We'd better start bering ua, Minnie, I our din it was still snowing, although asd, The als bad gone me some good, ner to-day slipped your inind “I wonder if it strikes you, Minnie,” ‘Mr. (Dick anid, moticing me Cor the frat The Funniest Story of America’s Greatest Woman Humorist _| and take your station upon the threshold. aura of light about you, and each tiny beam will be a death dart to Jeal- ousy.’ Your virtues will make an The queen @id as she was bidden and, Lo! even as was prophested, the dreadful whisperings of Jealousy were never more heard by the kin; And he and the queen invited Dan Cupid to live forevermore in their hearts and homes, time, “that 1f you and Sam hadn't been 80 confounded meddling that fellow Pierce would be washing buggies in the Village livery stable where he belong! and I'd be in one piace of property that 4s good as gone this minute “Egg salud and cheese!” ck. “I'm sick of cheese, suid Mra. If that's D the kind of supper you've been serv- ing""— But I was in a bad humor anyhow, and I'd had enough [stood Just inside or and I told them I'd done the ‘ould, not for them, but because hited the old doctor, and if Pd histukes I'd answer for them to nif Lever met hien in the next world. And in the mean time 1 washed my hands of the whole thing and they might make out best they could, I was going, Mrs, Dick heard me through, ‘Then sho came over and put her hand on mine wh it lay on the table. “You're perfectiy right,” ehe said, “T know how you have tried, and that the fault Is all that wretched Pierce's, You mustn't mind Mr. Carter, Minnie, He'e been In that #ort of humor all day.” He looked at her with the most mis. erable face { ever saw, but he didn't say anything. She sighed, the little wretch, “We've all made mistakes,” she #atd, “and not the least was my thinking that Twell, ne nt 1 dare say we will manage somehow He got up th nigery, his face twisted with Sa “You hate me; you ich your hand—oh, I'm not but T saw that edy for that Is very simple,” ed coolly, "You needn't touch Tananned “Just atop before You say sor nz you'll be # for or hat me, why 7 wave want to ' Ket away tl they're Ho nick Of ea n't Ret over It the of their The only sensible mneymoon T ever heard of was when one of the chambermalda here marrint lives a farmer in the net bonhond. It was harvest and he couldn't leave, ao she went atone to mee her folks and ah: eaid it deat having him low." | hot. ne Bhe was setting out the mipper, put ting things down with a bang He didn’t move, although he must have been starving. Another thing I'd advise.” 1 “Rat firet ul ti You'l! things different after you've got some thing tn your st “1 wisb you wouldu’t meddie, Minni By Mary Roberts Rinehart —-——Author o' eVal whe anapped, and having put down her own plate and knife and fork, not iay- ing 4 place for him, she went over aad tried to get one of the potatoes from tho fire. Weill, she burned her finger, or pi tended to, and I guess her solution 4H Kood am mine, for she began to cry, and when | left he was tying It up with @ bit of hia handkerchief; If ahe shivered when he kissed ft I didn't no- tice it. They were to come up to the house ‘ter her father left in the morn- ing, and I was to dismisa all the old help and get new ones ao he could take charge and let Mr. Pierce o. J plodded back with 1 mpty basket I had only one clear thought—that 1 wouldn't have any more teamping across the golf links in the anow, T wan too tired really to care that with the revular winter boarders gone and elght Weeks atill until Lent we'd hardly be able lo keep going another fortnight. T wanted to get back to my room and ko to bed and forge Mut as {came near the house I ew Mr. Pierce come out on the front piazza, and switch on the light, He stood there looking out into the snow, and the next minute I saw why. Coming up the hill and acrowm the lawn wae @ shadowy line of people, Diack againat the wh ‘They were not speaking, and they moved without noise over the snow. 1 thourht for a minute that my brain had gone wrong, then the fret fignr me Into the light, and tt was the bishop. bie rtood at the front of sand looked up at Mr. Plerca. y."" he said, trying to look that thie ts gooner than you aus!" Fierce looked down at the crowd. he smiled, a growing amilo that ended in a eel ‘On the eontrary,” he said, “lve been pe ting you for an hour or more" process.on began to move «loomlly Ip Cie stepe® All Of them carried hand ixgaxe, wd thay looked tired and sheep sh Miss Coby stopped in front of Mr Plerce "Do you mean to way,” furiously, “that you knew she demanded the railroad was blocked with snow and yet you let us Ko? ‘On the contrary Miss Cobb." he aid poll ‘T remember distinctly regretting that you {naisted on go!ni Besides, there wast S!erman House.” Senator Briggs stepped front of him “Probably vou also knew that that wan full, stables, with > tre ed furlously Two by two they went in and through the ball, stamping the enow eff, and aD f trains," hi @owly.”” ——$—<$<_— 5-Minute Fights With “Fate’”’ The Way I Live. DON'T know why it m that everrwe else seems to get #0 much more out of life than I Men biow in from the Weat . *parkin, the Joy of living. Men, allegedly from the South, tell with enthuslaem of their sports, their fennte, thelr social em tivities. Even the men who live on @s, same block with me wale out in the' morning and disappear down the sub- Way steps as though the day held some- thing vital for them, something of a triumnph to be won, a victory to come, And I go along in my dull, dub way and watoh the other fellow. My lifes @ monotone, Kvery morning, when first 1 open my eyen, I earch my memory for som thing that may be going to make the day unique 1 try to force myself to Temember something I have forgotten —something that holds out great posal- bilities of excitement, Joy or even con- filet. But, with the clearing up of eleep by ‘The Frew Puttidhing Co. (The New York Bresing World). uninteresting plays, when I'm dresses Up in agonising clothes, and thea in Coming home to kick about the meney wasted. Sometimes I wonder if perhape men look at me ang think I'm ‘one delirious round of pleasere Ufe, Maybe they do. Some of anyway, because didn't Jim me on the back and tell me the day that the reason I wore eo well because I wi fo blamed hegex-ge luoky? Well, if 1 do loom like that om the out, tombstone fer & Wide when I've got a eart on the inside, £ guess there others % the world Go get away ey the same emf, Maybe they aren't as Joyous ag they wok. Or magte easier to BE ft when you ta? on @ Geld front and pretend to the other tellew that you ARE it Once I saw & piay in which one @ the women characters kept saying thet “if you have happin within yours@tt you can make all aboht you happy, |pert was that of an early Victorian Peace fanatic, and every time she got o@ that line we all guffawed, as at some slapstick comedy, But that strikes the nail head, all right. Happiness within yourself’ Don't absorb all the radiamee ry i t at m, comes the realisation that to-|And give off wil the gloom, Shed some golng to be just like yesterday, |Drightness yourself. [ guess that's the |fumt an @ wilderness of to-morrows answer, Shed some brightnem ‘will be. Just for experiment I'm golng to I rise against my will (T never get {begin my days differently. tm going enough sleep), The water's never hot jto see whether I can change their topeg enough for shaving and the razor's |raphy by putting something of MYSMLP always dull There are more collars|in them. Instead of waiting for things ‘with battered edges than intact ones in |tho drawer. The dining room is clone, sodden with steamy heat and un'nep'ring. My amusements consist !n going to to happen to relieve the monotony I! MAKE them happen, I'm going to fight the Fate hookworm and turn {t into @ live wire! to thelr olf rooms again, leaving Slo- cum, clerk, ataring at them as 'f he couldn't believe hia eyes. Mr. Plerce and | watched from the plazza, through the gla We saw Dr, Barnes atop and look, and then go and hang over the news: @tand and laugh hinee!f almost purple, and woe saw Mr. Thoburn bringing up the tail of the procession and trying look unconcerned, Tam not @ reveni fu! woman, but that was of applest moments of my life Barnes turned suddenly and, ching me by the anm, whirled me Around and around, singing wildly some- about the animals t In two by phant ant hongaroo, He stopped as suddenly as he began atin on 0s Sa te oes wes “put I'm thinking this forty daye @now is neariy over, Minnie, T don't think much of tie dove and the oltve branch, but we've got to keep them" Is against law,” | quavered, “Nonsense! We've got to ma A want to sta We gave them 4 good supper and B@, Plorce claret served without @m- charge y k they were in better humor, and when ¢eg'd din the dobby Miss Summepe gave an imitation of Marie Dressler @ ing the Salome dance. Every now amd then somebody would look out and aay it was still snowing, and with the ory of the drifts and the cold steve the railroad station behind them 4 gather closer around the @re it that they would go as seem ae a ee =>