The evening world. Newspaper, June 26, 1913, Page 16

26, 1913 JOHN, I'VE FOUND AN IDEAL’ TRIP For OUR SUMMER VACATION . JUST THE TRIP You NEED Copyright, 1918, by ‘The Prem Publishing Co, (The New York Bening Wertd), HERE is no such thing as “an honest man” when it comes, stealing time, an umbrella, @ heart, a book, an after-dinner or a kiss, | . «NO, 18,937 THE MAYOR AT HIS BEST. UR polymorphous Mayor rarely appears to better advantage than when trying to save boys from being treated like hard- ened’ criminals. He plainly means to bring to trial the patrolman who arrested two sixteen-year-old Brooklyn boys for play- img with a light rubber ball in Prospect Park, and also the lieutenant whe locked them up in a filthy cell with twelve other prisoners. Although the police knew where the boys lived they neither notified ’ ‘That old fallacy, that a woman’s “no” means “yes,” probably nated in the masculine conviction that no girl could actually, honestly MEAN to refuse him, even though she THOUGHT she did, A 96 per cent, solution of sweet indifference is the best brand @ alcohol in which to preserve a man’s love. Men no denger seem to need wives; probably because they find motor car just as alluringly uncertain, expensive and hard to their parents nor made any attempt to treat thom as other than ECOND DAY. LEAVE WARM RO DAY. LEAVE MUDHOLE common scamps. 4 SPRINGS AT 7:00 A 1 ARRIVE AT 8:30. ARRIVE AT DRYLARE Why can a husband never be made to understand that the di Pe a re tot AT SI Ueyie AT NOON . LEAVE Hoon . LEAVE AT | 00 PM By between @ “dress” and a “frock” is about ten dollars; between a The Mayor is right when he says that this is the way to turn a G 2 Ly ae AT FOUNTAIN ‘T -ARRIWE MOSQUITOE Town and @ “gown” about forty dollars, and between « “gown” and a “reg: boys into criminals. A certain type of policeman looks upon himself Veneer 7 ed re COR Age EAUTIFUL tion” about two hundred dollars—and up? es 8 machine for making arrests. The more people he lands in a cell the better he thinks ho is. Humanity and common sense are for other men’s jobe—not for his. Such policemen are responsible for a pérverted attitude toward law and authority in the ininds of thousands eof children who will later be citizens. His Honor sees little save what he wants to see when his eye is em the police. But he is not blind to what should be expected of them in the handling of boy culprits who mean no harm. Imaginary troubles make a man a pessimist; it takes a few éoum® right real ones to drive him to optimism for comfort and rel: The only kind of incense that the moderna youth bere: a “lovely woman” is that which rises from the cigarette which he pul® in her face. If a woman believes all her husband t ir, she’s regarded as fool, and if she doesn’t she’s regarded as a dragon. So what can poor wife do? ‘There are only three sure oures for love: Prussic acid, time an@! marriage, yaad Paving done everything he can think of for horses, dogs and wen, Park Commissioner Stover now finds an outlet for his inex- teaustible energies in planning fountains for the birdies. eo THE PRIDE OF THIS BAILIWICK. = | Feoaqroyateme ——— abs Fe Lak Be ONT WORRY. The city is saved and we know who did it. Midas AM FoR BLUFPHILL ar. $09 AH nave You Wh D Had it not been for somo rash youth in South Carolina who STUCK «1M -THE-MUD peave a 428 ce When Others Are Promoted ? offered to come here as special deputy to tucklo the gunmen E By : See OAV. fe Aan td A. A EE we might never have had this priceless confession from the pen of oar own true Julius. . “My Dear Young Man,” wrote the only Sheriff New York ever needed, “There are no bad men or gunmen in New York.” It ap- pears a few got in once. “They talked of pulling down our glorious red, white and blue fing, but I stopped them, and T never had to Copyright, 1918, by ‘The Prem Publishing Co, (The Now Test, Svening World), RB you dissatisfied with your job? cess, but the mere plodding through: Ie gomedody else always put | allotted task, even though it be dese. aheed of you? Do you get “Gown |Sctently, will not lend @o the tm the dumps” ana | *4vancement.” fire a shot. We are as clean morally asa placid country village.” : fhe 3a And hark ye: “New York is the great imperial city of the great- ' i pap eodeelonye 4 Lebieed ot est, noblest, richest country on the globe; a city that every man, ) : for the ONE oe zee whether he lives in the Ritz-Carlton or in Hester street, loves like tow in com: [etere, dlrk iy ri & hunter loves his faithful spaniel. As for myself, when the time ry eo in an comes for me to pass away to the Great Unknown, I want to die with feasons of your the American flag in my hand and my face toward the statue of TOR; Taberty.” : Proaident Piatey of | Zuth We guess we know devotion when we sec it. Governments may the Gouthern Rail- Ge tetter, Mayors may falter, police may err, but if Julius is around apn ida tive Jest to strike tela SAAAASAAAAAAASAABABAAAAAAIDS ABB] “A man may perform his allotted task nothing elee matters. May he live to save us many times before that bel weer’ most eMfcientiy and yet may always be| ox copia plodding and to great finsl scene. i) promoti made, Mrs. Jarr Adds to Her Husband’s Beets fart Ge reason, thet. be knows [NEST © nothing outside of his immediate duties Stupendous Fund of Ignorance |i i town ince of init i [orm ; SIAABABAAABIAIAIABASIIABABSBIARABAS |TarEenclen calling for Independent) nothing count of @ dancer, and it serves him Commissioner? “Why, if you had paid any attention] “The man to whom success and ad- pelits to th right. I saw her, and I didn't think her] “And Gertrude has broken every one | you would have heard say it was! wancement come is the one who com- oad ictal But Gertrude knows all sf thove cups with the green and gold | the Princess Patricia, for I think the|oines with industry and ohhctency tn the ut Ht." thought ft was an open set,| newspapers could be thrown in the | atechi immediat “L gather from your remarks that a|Dut it ian't, I'can get something like | Tower for being traitors If they. called ecceseinace estate ot iat re Crate cmeant Fiala oniy royal marriage is about to take place. * her ‘the Princess Pat’ in England, lations of hig work to that of but rather in the age of Mr. Micawbél ae ay ‘ ee re ee at Mt least I had the satisfaction | employees in his own depertm: of Dickens fame mho spent hie years of 11 bl t as a wh “tern nce T must confess pussies me,” was saucer except wh wile weeat sabitin et ee = EM ap htisal geet information as ig gr When you read In the headlines that some respected citizen or other has flown, don't be shocked. It was probably only @ hydro- plane and “all” ig not yet “discovered.” oe SEEING CREATION. G rent “MOVIES” will soon be with us. A young in- ventor of a submarine chamber has already taken successful fi eR ; ir, Jarr’s comment. it for the cat In the kitchen and ¢ snapehois of fish nibbling at a bait twenty feet under water. z wave the waiter at the Hotel Rits a|posstble about the details of work tm alll opportunity 1a rather echoed by me Hi ralurnihe Hes : ' "| Onerright, i818, by The Voss Renting Co. r, Wwe then steps on it anéibresks it; but Yeu dollar for a menu card that the King of | departments. Walter Malone, who sald: ie ie chamber is o simple affair at the bottom of a big flexible tube. ow veulug 5 : pean eee eee Elmer, who | can’t blaine the poor girl for being for- | Engiand looked a. when he dined there.| “He “They do me wrong whe say I come me ‘Three or four men can live comfortably in it for hours. A film i | WONDER i it's a love match?! afr, Jerr leas dea has ere toe Riser | na toa ern wien her ero el ae ear. iolt ne tet Sie! Gor When T knock and fall to find : eas metimes they are, you KNOW." lwas assista: nding ¢ Prince who is te marry the Prin- | perior and 2 en an to you lm . machine and 8 bunch of clectric lights are all that are needed to remarked Mre, Jart, looking 8D] Guest rrnice ee te thsag by le Meuenk wep put | (ot? Patricia—ehe was in New York at|charge them so that when his time fer |For every day I stand beside your, “400 record the home life of sharks and cels for the amusement of millions | from the morning paper. “Of Course |knew and knew Mrs. Jarr knew), ‘“‘comes| somewhat incoherent love!" said the Hudson-Fulton celebration, if yeu tion comes he will be ready for it | And bid you wake, and rise to Sight of people in comfortable theatres. . | they have to live happy ever etter, u8t| from that part of Europe. Claude, the | Jarr. ‘Will you tell me who is going| member, and eald she thought Ameri-| “Industry is essential to business suc- end win.” ; +. 4s the story books may, on account Of] young fireman, her other beau, has been | to be married? King of Portu-| om, "ee lovely, but they th too democratic, in Canada" transferred to another fire compan;, “What about th, ie German grince? and I do wish you could get him trans- ferred back. Do you know the Fire gal—for I helleve the kings of Spain and Italy are married—or Elmer. or) Claude the fireman’ Nature has no privacy left. At the present moment New York- royal etiquette-not permitting divorces, ere may see any evening a wild panther stroll from its leafy South Where doe, ac Sea jungle into the blazing tropical sunlight and bound with quick ¢ least idea what his good lady Elmer, not Oar Mrs Btryvert™ lashings of its tail almost into the lens of the camera. The same oe sche Mir. f , “Why, evening they may find themselves amid the eternal polar snows . "¥et ehe could have slaining . you, ‘The young man, watching a tiny penguin, in the very act of breaking from its shell,|jix» the King's looks, einegg aaa Sybase to an amusement unroll its fluffy self and emerge into the chill, bare world. & splendid horseman and very brave, Copvra SHEE, She Peew, Piaten nce Se Som Sine Ml, | Geoean Baber with Hd veal Ml, Never was such publicity. Man hns determined that, sooner or | tree icp voted bests Pt gt dtl M2" of youre ago the earth |!t. There are great bogs of it in Ire- | Couple's Picture in it, and he told Ger- A anne 7 A land. The harder subetanc: |, | trude he came from the same part of later, willingly or unwillingly, all creation shall pose to gratify his| view of troops on the fiime taken some- wae covered with = lumuriant | Tory times, if Tia cane pote Germany the Prince did. growth of trees, bushes and prying gaze. CARE SE Ae OIRO VO st arson telaht i |be able to see the impression of the} ‘So, although Gertrude prefers Claude Noacow; I forget. 1s of wondrous height and strength. | veing of w leat or m on the sur-} the fireman, I told her she was a fook | a 4 tut, anyway, there wae the At last that growth died and its dead | © of a piece of coal. It is the most |{sh girl not to find out everything she eae King on horseback, and the film leaves and branches were gradually | practical fuel known and it ts getting /Could about the Prince, as I wanted | would have suited we—but that irte Sit Higher Next Fall.—Newspaper headline. Was just after a Socialist had thi buried under the earth. In centuries of m expensive year by yi to tell Mra, Stryv she'll think] trouble, We couldn't fad him: bomb at hing But, come to think of It, Spare us! Sufficient unto the season are the styles thereof? time this buried, dead follage began to; When the Romans we in England | we met the Prince abroad. Things i!ke| opinion he ain't to be found,’ it bai! he wine of a fa me bag change. It changed first into a fibrous, | they ured coal. But some of the Eng- | that help one's social position!" panion, | a Wrenner: =~ revewwmnnnne | Wis it the King of Italy or was it/etringy substance; then it slowly be-| lish kings, who came after, forbade| “Ours or Gertrude’s or Elmer's?’ beret Sng PTY H Le tters From the P 1 King Manuel of Portugal? came almost as hard a» atone, the use of it because the gentry “ob- | asked Mr. Jarr. 7 Champion Optimist. | Some Clerical Jokes. & eopie “No; that young man ix fat and is} The spongy stuff was peat, It is |Jected to the unpleasant smoke!” Wood| But Mrs. Jarr only remarked that E award the championship diamond belt} A VOLUME aight be written, same o nnn vanantinnaccana--- {always shown in the pictures in white| used for fuel in great quantities both | was the fashionable fuel. Even Queen! there were other things in life and for optimism to a resident of ove of; to the Strand, u National rd requires your attend-| trousers and amiding, with a Panama|in Scotland and Irela Peat ts ti Elizabeth thought that the burning ef |newspapers than baseball, thank good- the rural districts of Scotland, , ‘As the story goes, an okt man was sitting on ‘To te Editor of The Evening World: a ft at all times, T.F, | hat. But he fost his kingdom on where di growth Hes just on the coal was unhealthtul. ne ‘Meow that schools are clowing, a huge cons - - = amy of children are thrown into the thie won't @o st all, It gugar.”” He extenuded Brats Se me costae oc week \ x Beany and the Gang FR #4 ( aryl eo Recithtul amusement, This is a grav» ‘was & careless slip. aff ie the home must divide 5 j y OW - YOu! to "B, X. rd TRC MEAN (T- AN A a Feearding the i) NEVER: NEVER FORGE HOWARD, sa of 3 < . , the late, ward, I am * former militia- | A 00 IT AGAIN ON Hows, pony | F * York City, All that | { "'"- , Con ae ie (es, 1 regarding drills, camp- . ry holidays {s true, ¢ D power for optimiam i American the | Ei » “ fine place, The and attractions the “Guard” | are_many, sitch aa entertain: | ments, ci sports of all kind. And fae also receive pay from the Gov- ‘and State at camp. There is ibs He eat igi u 5 if