The evening world. Newspaper, August 17, 1912, Page 8

SERRE TE Che ESTABLISHED BY JOSEPH PULITZER, Park Row, New York RALPH PULITZER, President, 62 Park Row. BAERS BITKW. iTrenmucer, 62 Park Row. JOSHPH PULITZER, Jr, Secretary, 63 Park Row, Pntered at the Post-OMce at Now York ae Fecond-Class Matter, Potmcription Rates to The Bvening| Mor Eneiand and the Continent and L ited States All Countries in the International taal ‘Sol Coen Postal Union. + $3.50] One oar... + 801 One Month... oo SRE ee ALDERMEN’S HONOR. T’: MAYOR is shocked at what the Aldermen and the wardmon seeeeees NO, 18,623 and the district leaders have been squeezing out of the 7,500 newsstands in the public streets and passageways of the city: At the rate of $200 a license, and I verily believe that ts the overage aum they get for them, you could ratse a million and a half of dollers of graft out of.these licenses! There are 7,600 licenses throughout the city, and to do it is @ shame, because most of those who take out these licenses are people etrug- gling for a living. 1 wrote to them (the Aldermen) again and called their attention to this case, but they patd no attention to it and it was not remedied, 1 thought FOR THE SAKE OF THEIR OWN HONOR that the men in thet board who are respectable men and have reputations in their communities would take tt wp and put a stop to it. BUT NOTHING WHATEVER WAS DONE. The Mayor should revise his notions of Aldermen, their duties and their honor. We used to think they were meant to right wrongs, pass ordinances, keep a city fair and orderly and serviceable for its citizens. Aldermen may do these things in some cities. Ours are too busy norsing graft and privilege. When New York City Aldermen sit they sit softly for fear of dis- turbing somebody's rake-off. Not long ago they pretended to examine the scandalous extortion practised by the taxicab companies upon the people of this city. ‘They held a few hearings. It became clear from these hearings that the big hotels are eelling for thousands of dollars each year etreet privileges that belong to tho citizens of New York. The taxicab companies grab this money etraight out of the pockets of the people whom they force to pay tho present preposterous taxi rates, It became glaringly plain that exist- ing taxicab fares and regulations are a shame and a disgrace. It bo- came plain that TAXICAB EXTORTION SPELLS TAXICAB GRAFT! Then what did the Aldermen do? They hushed up the hearings and quit. “NOTHING WHATEVER WAS DONE!” Pwlisned Daily Except Sunday by the Press Publishing Company, Now, 63 to 63 ee ee PETTITT SORE = There are Aldermen and Aldermen. Ours are a special brand. (HEY OUGHT TO BE STUDIED. rd A VOLCANO OF DRAMA. OW COME the harvest days for playwrights, More theatres, N more plays this season than ever before. Demand ineatiable, supply inexhaustible! Yet never was the reward of master play builder greater or more alluring. In spite of encouragement and prizes, however, the successful playwright of to-day probably turns out fewer plays than did his predecessors in the great and spacious days of the drama. Few first rate dramatists since Shakespeare, Moliere and Schiller rival them in shelf space. The famous Spanish poet and playwright, Lope de Vega, still holds the record. In 1603, when forty-one years old, he found that helhad written 341 plays. In 1609 the number had risen to 483. By 1618 he had to his credit nearly 900 pieces, and when he died, in 1635, his toial output of plays reached 1,800! _ It is asserted that every one of the 1,800 was acted during the author’s lifetime! Five hundred have been printed and survive in Spanish literature. His biographers record that once at Toledo he wrote five dramas in a fortnight; and that half a morning wee often enough for him to polish off an entire act. The greater number are | three-act pieces in verse. He is said to have dictated poetry when H¥e years old, before he could write. His printed plays alone fill twenty-six quarto volumes, and there were thrice as many more beside! » Take note, ye modern playwrights, and despair! ° a. FEMINISMS. & WOMAN who flew into a rage and killed her husband pleads “furore transitoria.” Sounds more operatic than “a passing mad.” Ohio women have started a society to stamp out the habit of idle gossip among their sex. Still bent upon her own undoing! With the help of side whiskers, black stocks and trouser straps under their boots, Englishmen are bravely trying to recall the blessed era of Pre-Suffragettism. Mrs. Gertrude Atherton says the Bull Moose candidate is a “self- sufficient, one hundred per cent. male,” just the kind women go crazy »op of Harlem youngsters followed him with silent awe. “Don't remember me, eh, old top?” asked the young man who had given Coors, We YET Rerk Wea yf thi YOUNG man, attired in one of the) 7) 9 ahagsy blue suits that are all the ‘among the more tasty dress- The ere of the Jeunesse doree, came swak- a gering up the street. Sod ‘As he walked he pressed down, with Clerk. the palm of his hand on is crooked handle, a thin yellow bamboo cane with Knobby ridges all its length that gave It the aspect of a snake's backbone paint- e4_yellow. ‘6 HAT are you reading?” 1 We “Baseball,” When he did this, and deftly re- Lavvad you inter- moved his hand, the bent cane would ested? of didn't straighten out like @ living thing and know you were.” bound up into the air above the youns “Oh, yes. Bince man’ . 1 got over that ‘As it came down he caught it and Marathon mush twirled it up in the air, and while it) was spinning in the alr the young man rtormed an amazing bit of jusslery wich tt, and with his flat-brimmed het and a cigarette, which feat he end ed by cacthing the cigarette in his mouth, the cane horizontally across the toe of hie uplifted patent leather show and the edge of his uplifted straw hat on 4) the bridge of his nose, with the fan I met on the Sixth ave- noo L I'm Inter- ested again, Any+ how, the head waiter in the tea room the only eport around here), me ® pair of purple buck- ins to match my new fall sult agains: Then, with a graceful stooping mo- ‘\ box” of Odoretta cigare that the ton, he Kicked the cane up into hi® Gignig would lose the Pennant. An’, hand again and let bis hat drop from yoo, by to-day's news It certainly does standing on edge on his nose back onto joo; jIke ttle Connie wuz goin’ to about. Then she shouts, “Vote for Wilson!” Not like other girls! ——++. An educated people is easily governed, FREDERICK THE GREAT, Died Aug. 17, 1786. The Day’s Good Stories Deduction. MEY, late Wil! McConnell was baggage room of @ eailad pany with Mel Stoltz, They were to gl thelr — checked, Presently Gage handler pas Pushing @ sample trunk, ‘which, according to Mtolts, was about nine feet le. * efaculeted Mtolts, ner of that trunk dov't know,” ead McConnell, ‘but fram ba! shave of that peckage I'd say bowling alleys," City Times, ———>_— How She Managed It. for the soul. you know." heard wo. Well, you eee, 1 make yuk oney aside from my regu. femion t9. good “Yea, 1 Same Thing. HE orchestra playgl No, 6, @ ealection thet ereinel to the daobelar very beautiful, Teaved toward his companion and whispered “Tow lovely that fo! What is tt, do you know?’ Ade au. x4 Gemumly and relied ino low, thriUing voice "It to the “Malden's a ‘And at the same time she handed him ber pro: week! was elwaye prying iuto other people, the pretty girl et the ribbon He his head. shell it fe thi ores | AL AY bo iwanioed bat oa aSeeten fine ty Caen eR The Synonym. eking, to match your new fall sult, that they'll win the Pennant. Then you're covered on both sides. Does it go?” “Say, you're a sport!” she declared enthualastically, hake! do T cough up if T lose?” “The confession of another conquest. il right. We'll make {t Simp, the soda singer. He wuz next on the list, 1 think, “Now, Connte,"" I reproved, ‘Just be- cause it's the fashion in the papers just now to have desoriptive monakers is no reason why you should fasten o shower of words like that on that poor defunct conquest!" “You sound Itke an ad. for a college course,” she said, “but I got yuh, Steve! The «uy's name wuz Simpson an’ he was called Stmp for short.” “You're forgiven," I murmured as ehe paused for my approval, “Well, I come in the store one night fer a cake uv soap, an’ right a) I fell fer the grand way he made a | -wnatt | "lL bet you @ pair of purple buck- | But what (chawklet flavoring), gmmme, pointing ¢o No. @ wind ber fing He wad end stared, for the real name of the was Mendola’ asuming © mysterious alr, “if you will not to tell anybody 1 will let jou inio » “Wedding March." wchelor bovghs the sing mest day,—-Cla- cinpatl Enquirer, , correct English phrase for mark!" The Conquests ' Of Constance _—<—$<—$— $$$ ———— (SWITCHBOARD OPERATOR AT 1HE HOTEL RICH) —————— By Alma Woodward Copyright 1912, by The Press Publishing Co, (The New York World). j the alr with it! she retorted] ' yesterday. | wavy ine with a quart of malted milk had went I sailed up nice an’ quiet an’ | whon he Mippet I says: “1 hate slang, but | know of m0! pack again. Now, many a time I seen ‘easy | feller who wus expert do a long dis- to hand yer, tance throw with that drink, but never! er's flop. “Why not ‘ultimate consumer?'" before did I see anyone draw things 'y Good night!’ " 7 The Evening World Daily Magazine, Saturday, August 17, [A Fixed Post % + aicistas| BA By M. de Zayas Jarr Receives and Turns Down Eis One Best Chance to Get Rich BISSISSSTISSITISS FHGITFIIITFIIFISITS SIFIISIIFIIOIISIO this astounding free street performance. | produced a card which read: Mr. Jarr surmised he was the old top| .. in quesilon, He shook his head in the negative. Whereupon the young man Iam Sidney Slavin. ‘Who : the (and here was imprinted in : vivid scarlet a conventional por- : trait of his Satanic Majesty) : Are You?" : 3 taking the card back and replacine it in his pock “My professional address, ‘Care of the Billboard,’ 1s on the back.” “Yes, I remember you, now,” sald Mr. Jerr, “you are Mr. Slavinsky'’s oldest boy?" “Yep. You and the old gink are great age} Lhe Beg ker an'| “Your father and I are friends and, If it from the hig ee Mie OK ee 88 | roy Wika @ have sare aniaiee ot the desk an’ unchained @ nickel! AG’ T) “son, ait right, all slant! take it “Gimme one of them.’ | back!" aid the young man hurredly “ant i »| “Well, I'm glad to hear you talk that ‘An’ he says back: ‘I6 cents, pienso!) "We oar “an then I looked Uke I wuz crushed Wey.” Said Mr. Jarr. “You're Just back an’ I surprised myself an’ worked a {fom the West. How's theaericalst” blush, an’ he says low down: |” Sve Gane epee ang: “But, of course, to GOOD customers! Mr. Jarr regarded hie slim, white we make It 10. piano playing hands suspiciously. “Then I knew T had him, an’, ‘For the movies," explained the younr what he didn't put in that drink wusn't msn. jas doing press work and nobody's business—it had chop sucy Mllyhooing and had the dip privilege auinned a cite |with Comanche Charlie's Wild West, “Didn't tt make you ack? {and T learned to ride @ mustang. When Naw! Nothin’ makes you sick when J found the open air producing compa- you're in love, The doctors ain't on to| nies were paying ten bucks @ day for | the reel cure “for indigestion, an’ any-| Movie’ actors that could ride and rope, ‘now, if they wus they'd get pinched fer |I Joined out with ‘em in Oklahoma, recommendin’ {t, ‘specially to married | “Well, I hope the exercise in the open folks! It's just to sit opposite some one | Sir did you good,” said Mr. Jerr, “Will | you're doxgone sweet on when you feed. |¥OU keep on a8 @ moving ploture cow- Why, if yuh got @ flerce attack of | boy?” mushitis yuh cin eat rubber heels; “No, T got a bank roll now,” said hashed tn carbolto an’ It won't hurt yuh, |Young Mr. Slavinsky. “I've got @ fol- 80 long’s as he's tellin’ yuh all the lowing too as a sure hit singer in the time that he'd sell hie grandmother fer jean See, ee Riser Worm, the a kiss from you!” | Priel nybody!’ That's “Well, I was stuck on him long |on all my printing. But I'm going tn nongh to sample every syrup that wus the show business for myself. I'm ver brewed, After a while I got a thinking of taking a “Buried Alive’ con- hankerin’ fer a good plece of steak an’ cession out for the street carnivals and baked potato, but I wus true to him | Sie. Pesaa pcg lies aw 8 goes aac an’ kep’ right on chewin’ maple nut! Who was loudini, who can do a mundaes an’ banana sp! An’ then| store window eeven day sleep and you one night I went into the store an’ he|can drive needles into him without him didn't see me, an’ I nid behind a bunch | buds any hour of the dey or night. o' hair tonte an’ watched him, An’ say!!But it'e a better drag for the rudes to “He had all the skirts of that nelgh-! bury him alive, I'm looking for @ part- horhood flockin’ ‘round like # lot of|ner with a little cash te put to mine, | bunzin’ bees, An' ae each one come in) and I may take out @ Chamber of Hor- he sayn: Tors too, See this outht for sale?” \ 4 food evening, Mies So-and-so—| And he handed Mr, Jarr @ clipping what's it to be thie evening? A rasp-| which read, berry smother or @ pineapple pinch? | jAn' then he'd do @ triple somersault)| with his eyes an’ suretle: i #9 weets to the sweet, “Tt wasn't only one or two—tt was the | whole goldarned female population, of ce 9 that precinct! An’ when most of ‘em AN les, Cal eee “Want to take @ Mier in the show busl- ness? We can't lose. A Chamber of a new drink I'm goin’ Horrors te @ mint on the Alfalfa Cir- “"KId, there’ It's called the undertak- cuit.” Yer a dead one with m But Mr. Jarr enld he thought he'd stick to commercia) ines. Pr $912 Copyrigtt, 1912, by The Press Publishing On, (The New York World). “ HAT do you hate worse than @ summer resort, Mr. Cutting?” im quired the Rib, as she let herself and the Mere Man into her tiny apartment and sank into a Morris chair with a sigh of exhaustion, “Another summer resort,” replied the Mere Man promptly. “Oh, how good it 1s to be home!” murmured the Rib, “And how nice you look—after four weeks of nothing bu. tmmer tnen™ “Thanks,” said the Mere Man. “This unsolicited testimont “T'm all frazsied out!" continued the Rib, unwinding her veil and sticking her hatpins into the divan; “I was frayed to the edges and worn thin before T went away, just from the exertion of trying to fin@some truly ideal place— within commuting distance. You know there ere reasons why I always like to be within commuting distance.” m I one of them?” inquired the Mere Man anxiously. “You are,” the Rib assured him sweetly. “But there are—er—one or two others, I wanted to find some resort where I wouldn't have to resort to cyanide or carbolic acid for reef’ — “Or to babes and octogenartans for attention?” put in the Mere Man. “Or to Elinor Glynn and Robert Chambers for amu agreed the Rik “Thore are thousands and thousands of placos; but whenever you find a really charming one, where you might get comfort and repose, and gain strength, you realize that {t would take all the strength gained during the week to pay your bill at the end of it. Next year Y'm not going away at all. I’m going to build &@ @ummer resort of my own.” “How original!” murmured “It ts," declared the Rib. and beautiful Imagination to do t “What are you planning?” inquired the Mere Man gently. an artificial lake and build a forest on the roof?” ‘Not on the roof—but in the ROOM, Mr, Cutting.” replied the Rib, waving her hand triumphantly around the cozy lttle apartment. “Just look at the view of the water from that window! Isn't that a good foundation to start with? Ie there any summer hotel from which you can see anything mere entrancing?” “None in the world!" declared the Mere Man, without taking his eyes off the Rib. “Now,” she went on, “I'm going to buy dozens and dosens of flowering plants and bank them around the windows and on the ledges and tn all the sunny spots; then I’m going to invest in two or three canaries to niako swent sylvan musio*—— “And a fow Angora cats to represent the piazza rocking-chale tabb! sted the Mere Man. ‘And I'll put middy jackets, and”. “But you can’t BATHE in your view of the water,” objected the Mere Man. “No, but I can bathe in the moonlight in the evenings, And I've @is- covered a new brand of bath-salt that smells ke roses and geranium a Milfes and violets; and I'm going to fill my tub with cold water and salt every morning and splash around fn it until I get the real impression that I'm having an ocean bath.” “You'll miss the banana peels and ¢in cans and dead clane,” warned the Mere Man sadly. 0 Mere Man, lighting a cigarette, ‘But it takes some one with a really vieleat “To construct p red and white awnin, \" went on the RM “and wear “Yes, and the morquitoes and gossip and bugs and worms and things,” she acknowledged ruefully. “And you'll have to paint yourself @ rich, red brown and peel your nose al feeling.” sighed the Rib. “But don't be so discouraging. Ané, tm she went on, “I'll get some nice man”—— “One of your ‘reasons’? inquired the Mere Man bitterly. “To take me to a roof garden, where I can listen to good music and sip cola things and—a' “Yen? Go onl" urged the Mere Man. sweet things?” “You ARE so cynical!” protested the Rib reproachfully. my ‘home-made summer resort’ a good idea?” “Bully!” said the Mere Man. “Only when you get long letters frem your friends !n the Maine woods or the Adirondacks you'll believe every werd they say, and be envious and discontente: “I won't read them, Mr. Cutting!” the Rib declared. “I know what you mean, I used to write that way mysclf. But here's the truth: A person who fe having all the glorious, mad, joyous dissipation they describe tn these sum- mer letters hasn't the TIME to write thi “Then what makes them always do {t?” inquired the Mere Man plaintively. “Just the inspiration?” “Just desperation!” returned the Rib, with a malicious little laugh. “And listen to nonsense and say “Don't you think Copyright. 1912, by The Press Publishing Oo, (The New York World), ‘ HAT Astor baby 1s certainly off twenty years—unknown of course to to @ good running start,” re-| the subjects of the experiment. A com- marked the head polisher, “with | parison and prospeote of those alive at & ready - made! the end of the period would be not only three million dol-/ interesting but instructive.” lar bankroll.” “Poor i:ittle [Fae Gutters wave} stranger!” said j The Gabfest Habit. the laundry man. 1 y he's off masb meeting at Cooper Unien “D* you born your way into tre Wednesday night?” asked the to a pretty bum start. He comes into the world with his future all framed up, but | the only father he| “There are times when mans meetngs will ever are justified, but the propensity of busy wE) be represented by a dollar sign. |Darties to shoot themselves into tne “His outlook te for a placid sort of anj4melight by calling o mass meeting existence up to the time he comes of | @Very coul of minutes has put con- age. He'll be tied to his mother’e apron | @derable of @ orimp inte that form ef ‘trings for many weary years —al-|Drotest against abuses, though his mother doesn’t wear an|_ “However, I will eay that the Cooper apron, In his youth he'll be known, | Unton mass meeting was pervaded by « not as plain ‘Jack Astor,’ but as ‘Jack Astor the Millionaire.’ Unless he ‘e singularly gifted by Nature, he billed to travel a drab road. “Hie chief disadvantage will He in his associates. A boy with much money in hie own right ta @ shining mark for sycophants, It takes a wise man to get away from kidding himself, What chance has ® millionaire boy with everybody around him ewelling his head? “Thousands of doye were born on| with th AD yeung Astor's birthday. Few of them|bdott to tena got a line in the papers. Many of ba i them came into the world as burdens to ee already harassed parents. We'll call! Dreekere to one of these Wille Jones, He starts| Ver? people aa In Iife possessed of Just enough clothes | meetin by to cover him. about thetr “The phystoa! resemblance between! *7es ot ‘Wille Jones and John Jacob Astor !e Ag ¢ Po. 01 ortey eo aub- striking, Hach of them bas a very| {007 Jo that maich m the oe vice in New York—a whole let of it, It: te ecattered all over town. There \mn't! @ istrict that doesn’t bear the smiron,’ Then why not drag vice out of the’ featdential districts and the tenement. Clstricts and put ft ine where @ can be branded? The te that targe head, two lows, two arms, fea-| thet platform would be overwhelwed tures and continuous hunger and thiret, | polls by the hypocrites, who count One feces ease and comfort, the ether|® Working balance of power.” Gisappointment and strife. ‘Willie Jones must fi ts way to fhe front. If he has the goods in bim he'll get te the fromt. Young Aetor starts at the front. And unless he has tronger goods in him than Willle Jones N gravitate to the rear. “If T had the money I'd pick out ten poverty baby boys born on the same day as John Jacob Astor @th and ar- Fange to have them aM watehed fer eithen” : be called called “Y “Woody” as Roosevelt t ‘Teddy.’ sald the laundry man, “end will never be called musay* ee