The evening world. Newspaper, December 29, 1910, Page 18

Shoulders in the doorway of his pawnshop, asking ironically, + Published Dafty Zxcept sr 4 rd Prees Publishing Company, Noa. 68 to 69 Par! ow, New You J. ANQh4 ed Pres. and Treas, JOSEPH PULITZER Junior, Beo'y. 63 ‘ik Ro 63 Pi * rk How. Entered at t! ‘ost-Office at New York as Second-Cinas Matter. Babepeipticn Rates to The Evening | For England and the Continent and ‘orld for the United States All Countries in the International | 9075 and Canada, Postal Union. 88 Te jont 18,027, WHAT ‘‘UNCLE” SAYS. AYING old things in new ways, | to express different combinations and developments of what we | have long been familiar with, pre- vents life from becoming monot | HOW onous. Wor instance, the theory | COZY that the dogs of war are held IT LOOKS IN THERE, CHARUE in leash by the banking and com: | mercial interests of the nations is | not original with Dr. David Starr | Jordan, the president of Leland Stanford University, California, But in lecturing Christmas night | to a patriotic assemblage at | Abraham Lincoln Centre, Ill., on | the subject of “The Old Peace | With Velvet-Sandalled Feet,” Dr. Jordan certainly had the air of | expressing some novel views in American language of quite recent | coinage, “All Europe is in hock to its ‘uncle,’” he says. By thts appropriate pawnshop figure of speech it {s to be under- | stood that the financiers who make the war loans own or control the | modern civilized nations—“for it seems there is a difference between owning and controlling a thing, such as a railroad, though some of us cannot quite grasp the distinction.” The Eskimos and the Hottentots may be free from the yoke, but | the world powers all have to grin and bear it. King, kaiser, czar or mikado may hold down the throne, but he can’t do anything with- | out seeing his rich “uncle.” He may not declare war even to right wrongs or defend honor, much less to gratify vanity or humor a whim, | without having first secured the permission of the philanthropic | relative who does business under the sign of the three golden balls. There is no danger of war for many years to come, while the - \ Wil big loans are outstanding, Dr. Jordan goes on to assure us. But! - the war debt is always there, growing bigger every year. Europe's | war debt now is estimated at twenty-six billions of dollars, or about one-third of all the money in the world. Such is the price of mili- tarism and armed peace, The Rothschilds and other money-lenders who “have the price” naturally control the situation. It is not nowadays the hand that rocks the cradle, but the hand that holds the cash, that rules the world. This borrowing of enormous sums for armament, and saddling ~ =. — The Evening World Daily Magazine. | Moving In. . By Maurice Ketten. Thursday, December 29, 1910. the debt upon future generations, to be taken in taxes from the peo- ple, is a tyrannous proceeding that might in itself make war cer- tain but for the grimly humorous device of raising a foreign war seare to divert attention fighting grievances at home. And all the while old Uncle stands smiling and shrugging his _. LS oe" Pre] aeetergee HE emancipated woman may dress like a gentle- man, but it will take three generations before she will be able to lie like one, from Most men spend their youth in enjoying the world, their middle age in catering to the flesh and their de- clining years in cheating the devil. distance lends enchantment—to any woman who happens to ROwLAN What are you going to do about it?” - Great cities, as well as great nations, have their uncles. The avuncular relative of New York is the Interborough traction company. +———__—__——— THE EVERGLADES, 11E Florida Everglades, where City Chamberlain Charles H. Hyde is supposed to be ramificatimg, have long been regarded A wife’ be near. After marriage a man puts his sentiment in cold storage; prodably so that it will keep fresh and sweet until it is needed again. Strange how the average man will pull like grim death at the matri- has been broken, dody else. always manage to addle his brain. any ,man. monial yoke, and then feel utterly astounded and chagrined to find that Reflections of a Bachelor Girl By Helen Rowland The funniest thing about a cynical epigram is that when you read it to the man who inspired it he ulways regards it as a huge joke on some- A fluffy little doodlewit may not disturd a man's heart, but she can No matter how many times hope may desert a man or love may deceive a woman we always welcome them back with joy and forgiveness. (An ounce of intuition is worth a pound of logic in the management of as a geographical mystery. It.is a region that lies almost on a level with the sea, interspersed with streams, abounding in svampe'| and strange islands where the scanty remains of the once great tribe | of Seminole Indians make their homes, Rather different from the gay corridor of the Waldorf and the | swell cafe of the Knickerbocker! | Complete separation from worldly cares and public duty is Mr. | Good Stories wees How I! Was Real. | an up-country church, not very far from here, A the minister received one Sunday @ notice to ye real from the pulpit, ‘The notice read in private. , inet i A person having gone to sea, Ide wife de- Hyde's only compensation in this queer exile, except, perhaps, the | *te the prayers of the congrexation." The minister ehureh, t look at the And Hy of paper eves weren't very good, $1,000 a month paid by the City of New York for services which he |" does not perform. ' How long will our Spartan Mayor stand this scandal? unanswered letter, wife, destren | the “prayer Philadelphia | Times, X Early t Tom'ses [Letters From the People Batic es Ra pore nner ener C OP COCO OCCCCCCLCO IC OOOCCOL OOO OCC I, wide reli ties teat A friend is one who, when he sees swim out. me," Mr. And when you are in the down-and nobody The Day's | What Is a Friend? -out The Hedgeville Editor By John L. Hobble ys that he would rather loan David Craum $5 than to have By Sophie Irene Loeb. ‘e Copyright, 1910, by The Press Publishing Co, (Tho New York World), FRIEND {s one who stands up for you in public and sits down on you He it is who helps you take your bitter piil by sugar-coating ft for you, A friend 1s one who withholds judgment no matter how long you have his He refuses to sign your note because he wants to remain your friend. A fHend is one who gives you the bouquet before you die. He 1s your enemy when you need one. A friend {s one who handles you with boxing gloves when you afe strong, and with silk mitts when you are weak, He it 1s who waits until the morning after to disagree with you you “in the soup,” shows you how to b @ friend is one who will give ws haw inany letters he's eu > write : Three Days to Fetacot worked out, as a man's earning ca-| ‘ner ns ym onl vou the: Acat aviation. queb! To the Editor of The Evening World pacity 4% usually getting smaller aa he | Hut what T can't just make ann Can any raflroad expert inform me] crows older. He finds it harder from | ° 0 ty all the ou vere whether jt is possible or not to #0 by | ye Know none of his fortears ever amounted to much * ‘ ae year {o year to xet along. A big fam-|in'e Mrary vas special service (by rel, method, that! tly ts no drawback in the country, for | "What sou talkin’ aboutt" Mr. Davis demanded ls having engines at intervals ready to tho family all help, which te the game | "wrnls know's well's TF do that his father couple on to one of two cars with very | as earning their own living, But there malcwesar quieber'n any other slight delay, cars bullt specially to stand | is one thing that a man must do and | the highest speed as to wheels, etc.) | that ie stick to his work 5 | ths stick to hie work, cut out all ; from Buffalo to San Franclaco, Cal., in| waste of money and be willing to worn | overnor’s Quick Wit. e 2 less than three days, or in three days? | and give up saloons, etc. Dhe wite MILB talking to a former Goremor of | PARED HANKS J. W., Elizabeth, N. J. | must be w “ ack | f° him always speaking when they meet ng to put up with a little Inconvenlence until you aye a start There are vacant homesteads and land | *e? i, 4 é “attended & §s cheap enough in the Nortiwost. Men | of the Stale. special » English tourist vor of a sight he Can't Sleep. ‘To the Edtitor of The Evening World Will some experienced reader kindly tell me some simple way to oure in-| get $2.50 to $3 per day in the logwing | tit af the 208 yw wom This shou inter can pe and saw mile. bat sass KE REYNOLDS sa others who can't sleep. 4B. wore, | | eee opinion of anything One Man's Experience, Timber Valley, Wash. | ingly, “I em ‘To the Editor of The Evening World Not Order” But then," he O8E HENNIS says she would rather I came to Wash: n State in 1902 | To the Kéitor ing Wor! | mot of ee tee R hum tell her the truth, and took up a homestead, I had only| Harry Hoffman gives the correct an- enough money to pay for “filing,” xo I/swer to discount problem (What {s the His Excuse. — RS. LE IS hopes that some day had to go to work to earn more money het price of a gun listed at 1%, with a 4 bad en e ighs 0 0 pound fifty-two years old. I worked out half |{9 wrong in stating that “discounts must apacity for unpunet of the time and the other half of the | be taken In proper order," as the series tally gos upon the old A LITTLE SCHEME. time I cleared iund. Now I have alot discounts taken in any onder will | ae ‘cover of his watch ta Chuily waiket | ."T @'POse I'M have to Invite the face nice home, fruit trees, two acres in|bring same answer, viz.: %3-25-10 per | in about balf-imat ten ative time of day | Uity to dinner," said. the dean, Strawberries, twelve acros in grain, | cent, or 10-25-38 per cent, or 2-10-88 per | to ket down to buainens, Mere {ty bait-past ten | | “A thowe professors!” exclaimed foven acres in grass and alfalta and alcent., or same discounts in any order | °'¢)*™ fd daly, | DIS Wife. “Think of the expense.” big garion with a large bed of as-|you wish to figure them, #0 long as you | on iis macnn aie vat te oR anmuidly, | "Om, I'l get ‘am to talking about car- Parigus, This I could not have had|take all the discounts off. Let those in- | the man, and not the man the office, and I've] bohydrates and they won't eat much.” if 1 haé stayed in New York City and! terested try in DISCOUNT, —Chicago Journal bean salting for th Kamel, SDE SS turn up ‘ 7 | PRANK CROUT says he can't decide w! of the United States or move his family to Indiana, hether to raise his yon up to be President that eggs are so high that a man can't express his love and respect her husband than have she Will be @ real Suffragette, but at TWO GRIEVANCES, | “What 4s Bliggine's grievance against | the rasinoad company?" | Courage! Frances Whitman Roberts. AKE courage! No battle was e'er T won without it; Your cause will be lost while you stand there and doubt it. If cruel Fate buffets don't take it supinely; Once cringe ‘neath her blows and she'll punish you finely. Don't submit to your lot, Fate's galling fetter; If you don’t Nke your lot pick out one you like better, Strike out for yourself, for submission's ignoble, bound by Don't sit down and fret over possible trouble, |Get out of the rut, climb out of the slough; Don't wait for a more suitable time— do ft now! For your watchword, “Endeavor!” Success for your goal; You'll win if you try with your whole heart and soul. And ere failure—black scourge!—settles down like a blight, Take courage, high courage! man's right, ee Memorials for Horses. JAPANBSE correspondent writes A in “Tis every the current Issue of Our Dumb Animals that despite the | fact that cruelty to animals exists in his country, “due more to ignorance than to malice,” there 18 a growing sentiment toward betterment in that direction, In the course of his letter, Masujiro Honda says: “Memoria! services were held for the horses killed and wounded in both the Chinese and the Russian war, and ‘q Buddhist priest 1s travelling all over Japan to raise funds for erecting o monument to the memory of the war- “He has two grievances; one is that | horses lost In our recent national strug- | 90me of the trains don't stop at his sta- tion, and the other that after he gets on | place a statue of a board the train loses time by stopping at other stations,”"—Weshington Star, Ay NAN OE Sip aHseee BPE eh gle, His {dea is to set up in suitable horse with the Buddha of Mercy, Kwannon, on its back." ne ert hn *h | bd | The Jarr Family _- Mr, Jare Acqutres One of the Finest 8 = Grouch Collections You Ever Saw. | Copyright, 1910, by The Press Publishing Us. (The New York Word). Co By Roy L. McCardell, | ¢ver”*av. Gee, just because @ man * erled Mr. Jarr ptays out @ little late during the holl+ CEJ OOK who's here | I Jocosely, as he entered Gu | days and after he's spent all his money buying everything his family wants, be cafe on the corner to find his|gcts panned, Before Christmas a man friend and neigh-|can do anything and a word won't be wor, Mr, Rangle, | said to him, but after they've got every draped over the| thing out of you"— altar of Bacchus.| Mr. Jarr now realized that It wae do And he slapped|mestic trouble that preyed upon his him heartily| frien on the back. ‘Now, look here, Rangle.” “Don't get gay,| “you're wrong, old man, You'll only you!” growled Mr. | make matters worse. Why don't you be Rangle. good?” “Why don't you| “Why don’t you mind your own bual- hang out a sign,|ness?” replied Mr. Rangle. ‘Familiarity Not| “You leave him atone.” said Gus, as Appreciated,’ | he leaned his weight on the table on his asked Mr. Jarr. taken somewhat aback, | third journey and rested his poor, tired “If you felt as 1 felt. appreciate anything,” | pow £. ME CARDELL you wouldn't | feet. “A man's got to have some en- erumbied Mr. | Joyment. If he ain't allowed to do what he wants to home, he can do it in my ‘You must have had a happy holiday, | place.” Didn't Santa Claus bring you any-| “I wish T was a fireman or a sailor or | thing?” ventured Mr, Jarr. seeing his} drummer.” sald Mr, Rangle, “and friend was glowering and sullen. | then people would be glad to sce me “Til lead a vigilance committee or a mob to rush through the mreets and lynch every street corner Santa Claus | C in eight, next year!” snarled Mr. Ran- gle. “That's how I feel.” “You're a cheerful person to meet out.” said Mr. Jarr. “Why don't you | go home “Huh?” asked Mr. Rangle. “Why don't you go home; this fsn't any place w come with a groush and when I came home." “Your people will be glad to ree you, e on home,” said Mr. Jarr. take him home,” sald Gus. “When my Lena knows you fellers are here she thinks I'm in bad company. Anyhow, I'll bet I'm going to get swung for these drinks, What's the use to get in bad, except for cash customers? And my feet is so sore It ain't no pleasure for me to go out when my Lena says es, spoll everybody's pleasure," said Mr.| why don't 1. I would, too, only I ain't Jarr. jtaking in enough from such customers “You let him bet!" said Gus, who had t hangs me up to hire a taxteab, come forward at this colloquy. “I know ‘ome on, I'll take you home and what he's up agains re it," said Mr. Jarre, ‘I'm in the “He's up against your bar,” sald Mr. voks at my house, but I'm @ good jJarr. “What he needs is to go to some | squarer for other people.” place where ihe can get a drink and ou'd wbetter keep out of this. You cheer himself up." aren't any too popular around my “That's a good idea,” safd Gus, sol-; house.” muttered Mr. Rangie. emnly, “Let's go out somewhere and} At this juncture Elmer. the bartendet™ have a good time. When Elmer comes . from his supper I can get away, too.” ‘I tell you what we do," he said. “1 don't want to go any place," | “Rafferty, the builder, is just got them growled Mr. Rangle. ,“I want to be let |new big flats done on tie next street. He Jives in them, Let's go call on him,” So the three went around to the new apartments. Mr. Rafferty lived on the top floor, It was on the eighth story, | and when they got to tne top they were informed that Mr. and Mrs, Rafferty were out Then they walked down again, only t@ note there Was an elevator, They 1 this because Mr. and Mrs. Rafferty w getting into it. He motioned them 1 wait for him, and en the return td came In and Gus took off his apron. nd sit at a table and | jhave a drink,” suggested Mr. Jar, | “Ain't it good enough. standing where | you a asked Gus. “I got sore feet | What you want to be making me walk out from behind the bar and walt you for?" A gleam of | Rangle's eye. | "Come on,” he sald, and he led way to the furthest table In the bac’ the room. “I hope his feet ache {that he'll have to go and get ' | putated.” | | “What's he done to you?" asked Mr. | Jarr, when they had seated themselves | and had compelled limping Gus to make two painful journeys. Je hasn't done anything to me.” 14 the dolorous Rangte. “But I hate interest shone In Mr. r goodness sake, keep away my place. My wife's sore at all of She thinks I was out with you night Then all four bid each other good night coldly and went gheir separate ys, ‘That is, they went home and separately surrendered. from Oue ast Dumbwaiter Dialogues By Alma Woodward | Copyright, 1910, by The Press Publishing Co, (The York World). Job’s Up-to-Date Comforters. Beene: Halloway Court Cifractese: Ars, Jerome, Mra, Lawson, Mrs, Grant and spring water man, AN rings Mrs, Jerome's bell M Mrs. J. (appearing)—Who is it, please? Man—Spring water to-day Mrs. J.—Yes, I'll take a case (Man rings Lawson's bell.) Mrs. L.—What Is It? Man-—Spring water? Mrs, L.-4No, not to-day. I have three bottles left, but I'll want some Friday. All right; I'll be around Friday. G.—Is that you, Canary Spring Water? —Yes; want some water? G.—Yes, I do; and I want to register a complaint, too. One bottle out of the last case I got looked very muddy—not a bit better than Croton, In fact, [ think some one must have filled that bottle with Croton, and I'm not paying fifty cents a case for Croton, you know! Man (patlently)—It couldn't be, ma'am, because every one of them bottles 1s led in the spring house. You'll notice they've all got pasted paper wrappers. Mrs. G.—Huh! It's easy enough to put other wrappers on them. Man—I guess maybe the glass in the bottle was Imperfect, and that made the water look dark. Mrs. G.—Weill, I want to examine each bottle before you go, that's all, I'll take a case, Mrs, J.—I've never had any trouble with the water at all, Mrs. Grant. I think It's splendid water! Mrs, L. (chiming in)—I've always found {t as clear as crystal, too! Mrs. G. (on the defensive)—Well, I've never had occaslon to complain before, but, I am sure that was Croton in that bottle, no matter what he says. And [ have to be so careful since my operation, too, you know! ‘The doctor says I'm In such a run-down condition that I'm lable to get pneumonta or typhold or any- thing! Mrs, L.—Indeed, you have to be careful, I guess I ought to know, Why, I've never been t me since my operation, and that’s a good year and a half ago. Mrs, J. (not to be left out of the game)—For six months after my operation I used to faint on an average of twice a day. Just without a word of warning I'd topple over In the street, or in the car, or any place! ‘Mrs, G. (nervously)—Graclous! How uncomfortable! I haven't gone out on the street alone yet, and I'm out of the hospital two weeks to-morrow. I'm so weak I'm afraid. Mrs. L. (darkly)—Maybe the operation wasn’t successful, deca: should have gotten back your strength by now, dear! Mrs, J. (soothingly)—Many @ person $s operated on without a blessed thing being done to them, ‘Dhe doctors have {t all thelr own way. What do we know? Mrs. G. (growing paler)—Oh, I think my operation was successful. They told my husband so, and they wouldn't dare tell him tf it were not true. Mrs, L.—Huh! Wouldn't they, though? You don't know them as well as I do! Mrs, J.—It seenvs to me every one 18 being operated on these days. Once upon a time It was quite a novelty—rather distingue, you know—but now—why, my wash woman was operated on for appendicitis last week! Man—Here's the water, Mrs, Jerome. Mrs, J. (intensely interested)—1 wish you could have seen me when I got off my sickbed, Just skin drawn over bone! Of course, I tire very easily even now, and I can't stand on my feet for any length of tim Man—Here's the water, Mrs. Jerome! Mrs. G. (consclence-stricken)—Oh, that reminds me. The doctor forbade me to stand at all, and here I've been standing all this time at the waiter. I'll get a ohatr. Man (insistently)-4Water, Mrs. Jerome! Mrs. J. (waking up)—Oh, are you there? Well, send tt up. Mrs, G. (returning with chair)—There! Now I can be comfortable. What a relief {t Is to sit down, Just shows how weak I am! Man—I'm sending up water to you, too, Mrs. Grant. Mrs, G.—Oh, dear; I forgot all about it. I wouldn't dare lift that case off the walter, The doctor distinctly forbade me to lift a thing since my operation! (Pause.) Well, 1 guess you'll have to pull it down again and come to-morrow, because the girl 18 out, and I wouldn't dare lift tt, because the doctor #akl— Man—Aw, I'll come up an’ lift tt for yet (Mrs. G, closes dumbwaiter door.) Mrs, J.—I suppose she thought I was golng down there and lift it off for T guess not! I had no business to lift my own case, Mrs, L.—Huh! To hear her talk you'd think she ever been operated on. Mrs. J. (with scorn)—Yes, and all she had done was to hay. her appendix removed. Mrs, L.—What a fuss about nothing! a . ; surely you My! the only one who had so Aiea mae _aseptopenenen ET " ao