The evening world. Newspaper, March 9, 1909, Page 14

Magazine, T uesday, March 9, 1909. Am ° s = s | | Nos, 63 to 68 | Published Dally Except Sunday by the Press Publishing Company Park Row, New York. JOSBPH PULITZER, Pres., 63 Park Row, J. ANGUS SHAW, Sec.-Treas., 63 Park Row, — — boiled Entered at the Post-Omice at New York Second-C Mail Matter, : ‘ption Rates to The Fyentng ) For England and t an Lea itor the United States All Countries in the Tnternational and Canada. Postal Union, oe $3.50 a Contl One Year, One Month, One Year. One Mont! ANOTHER CITY CHARTER. NEW CHARTER is something which New York ey is squandered, labelled panaceas on the shelves guaranteed to! cure all civic dis- cases, The new char- proposes is good so far as it concentrates responsibility, which is the most that any eharter can do, No charter can make anybody honest. No charter has such in-| hereit virtue that it can stop police graft, or prevent civil service frauds, or put a stop to political real estate speculation, or induce the Mayor and the Comptroller to allow more subways to be built. No charter can make men better or intelligent. The best it can do is to keep from making them worse by dividing responsibility and facilitating graft. | The political standards of any community are just as high or just as low as that community makes them, Usually they are no high- er or lower than business and professional standards. A grocer who) keeps short weights for his customers would, if elected Alderman or} Mayor or appointed commissioner or policeman, pursue his habits of| swindling and theft on whatever scale his powers and his office per | | mitted. A lawyer whose legal skill has enabled his corporation success-| fully to overcharge the public would naturally as a public official con- The Evening World Daily The New Charter Clothes By Maurice Ketten. DESIGNED By Wan om. IVIND MUNICIPAL TAILOR City gets every! few years, When) the city govern-| ment is bad and} the tax rate rises to intolerable, heights and mon-| estimable citizens! go to Albany as it| the Capitol were| a patent medicine} drug store with} ter which the} Ivins commission | LIKE A ‘SAFE SUIT tinue to overcharge the public. Merely electing a man to office rarely if ever makes him better, and frequently makes him worse by reason of the larger opportunities Whether Mayor or Alderman, judge or policeman, a man’s honor and conduct are what he himself is, not what the title to his office | might imply. | For the same conclusive reason that water will not flow higher than its source, so the virtue of public officials is no higher than the civie virtue of the community which elects them. The reason there are bosses is be- cause £0 many business men of high and low de- gree profit by do- ing business with a boss. The reason there is graft is because so many + people find it more profitable to pa} graft than to obey the law or to stand up and fight for their legal rights. With every wish for the im- DEON rifying of the gc ernment of New York City, The Evening Worl! would respectful aubmit that no pu- rifieai‘on can be it his individual bi ment and pit nanent and effective without every citizen mak ed civi to see tiat the dictates of a puri ene are enforer ! pal action high and 1 Letters From he People | 4 ene st] The Unluek © Conductor, iUantePertips: tlatitanwivathey nave \ A ‘1 euret ited F ine t. What nad \ i 5 a H.s see i ae A Name to Remember, ertain : t GC t eat the Peat ‘i Tuesday, MIfred Anstin. ‘ Hes Ne “ cial s. land 7 Smoking or Chewing? v Mitor o g Wor hot § : positions t ' x the Job. Is h that : ase te and yet + tha is the ay two or t g ss ¢ natant © 32 1 foreman « tlm pot & drinking terest many, J. K, Mr. Jarr Finds Himself Between a Stony-Eyed Wife And a Weepy Grass Widow. What Cana Poor Man Do? By Roy L. McCardell. ‘oe . Jarr, sharply. & most exasperating one to men of Mr.! ing after her now, your Jarre saw Mrs. Kittingly. Up eyes were red with weeping. ‘She won't let Gertrude c No, she's {n a santtartu administer oxygen yesterday Jarr, tn a most and more Mr. J \le game he knew that way, and me yearned for the But, then, It doesn't do to be! He| too genial and sudden with pretty grass | widows—when your wife's around. hought Mr, Jarr,| “and Bepler's ways overbids his lo "whispered Mrs, Kitt je specialists say that gave lier but an operation not bring myself to give consent was Ment!" exclaimed Mrs. ye ' Mrs. Jarr has been so good to ma dur-\!n the game ¢ to himself, “It Looks |!n& my trouble—such a comfort!” . Mrs. Jarr gave her husband a signif. cant look, which meant "You sit down | tet! And, ladies, that’s a| tight there where I can have an eye on his chance to make g money and en Would vu her tempera- we do seems to Just moans fit to break “Well, I was te! [ture Is 1%, a Mr, Jarr sat down, but oh, for a good) help bh S| ugh | excuse to escape! “Go on, dear, to Mrs, Kittingly thought Mr, Jarr, ‘if they've got a four-handed game of pi I haven't been for a long time.” Just then a knock came to the tloor {n the hall, and Mrs, Jarr, 60 ushered in, with man. pleased surprise, Mrs. Kt and oh, thank yi said Mrs. Jarr, turning wrong with her? had come down the Jarr flat in ight march ouse gown of clinging ness on the kimono order, but she dr: puff from her sleeve, remark- ye didn't mind Mr. Ja je husband of Tye had four spe exclamations of | UC CLT Ingly, the lit- who llved up- said Mrs. Kitt siders expense at ‘said Mr. Jarr, looking in the! world, and, ass: You've got company. think I'll run out and get a little fresh alr for a few minutes.” i “You won't do anything of the kind!"'| endeavored to com- | "You drag @) do next. The vote w 1] pose herself, she powdered her pre| epfest over that fat old ed Mrs, Kit-|me tnto a evself, and. fice t “T-am-a-friend-of-y de that pretty grass widows take !s ode out to Gus's, slippers, nd all ndignation {sa good get-away. eyes is just breaking 1 A Flight of Fancy By Ferd G. Long SS TR =< $POODODDDODODGHDOHOCOOOOOQDHODODQHOGOIFODODOHODSGODIOSOOOOD. Wh-t Every Man Does Not Know By Edith Ses OOVLOOOLO: sions Tu ® NO. L | When you are assuring some $9 }ecquaintance that you thoroughly u There are a fe’ things, dear| derstand women, having made a wud of all their moods and tenses, ant brother, you do not know about 2! uplifts soulful eyes and say | Women. “Yes, see that," you don! know that at that instant she {s sayin OU think, dear brother, tha eeu Hoeeuatly Tatas ay to herself, "Oh, piffie! This ts the wore Womankind, eh, wh ease of fat head I have seen for som You flatter yourself that) !e the soft, purring Ilttle irr pussy cat of a woman, $ Asto Your Wife, the weird, uncanny, vampire type, th rt) meek dove and the !mpasstve, sphinx- t your generosity Uke creature are of fonioteve i jon’t know that she of your understand that you are the gota dollar out of they one © en you brag a Yes, well, that's know would fill a book, Some famous nehman that a woman has ty-seven wo t saying “No.” Her “yes” ts usually given with mental reservation. Did you know that? When she promises at the alt to obey you, she always says to herse | eyes, I will," with tne scorn. you ask her to da away quick, she to herself she adds, band ready 1 you look y that she this is a » my Easter When’ So, arn your socks, rig’ 6) , there are know about you should unst thelr ess It te mind to ves, dear, {About Your Sweetheart. é 5 about a hundred Do 1 know that when your s rt is Istening to yo King, she is Je aoaamad.- our salary 1s and just how she is ge § A Woman's Weapons. } to find out? ot Oh, you didn't know that? © an admission. f you look flerce and yell ¥ you will earry your pol to work weapons, \f nent, aly have th place tthe’ She knows which blade to weld at th vin {where you, with have a 3 " eas ¢ brute force, dgeon, she employs only steel, You would crack 3 to parry and feint. Caresses, tears, flatte Jewel among women. that sho {9 at that moment leave you alone for two shift for yours: He she goes to the ¢ th tor. seashore or ¢ ntalns for a great) s e dust 'gh bi ume. ¢ Mrs. Solomon Being the Confessions of the Seven Hundredth Wife. Translated By Helen Rowland, for the heart of a man is like unto a Broadway ar, in which there is always room for ONE MURE Behold 1n matters of love a woman is a specialist, but a man is a GENERAL PRACTITIONER. Yea, a tcoman loveth but one type—eren one man—but a man loveth ANYTHING which happeneth to be handy. Lo, he that weddeth a brunet? E ARKEN, my daughter, and observe my counsel, HELEN ROWLAND shall chase peroxide blondes and burnt sienna roans for the rest of his and he that marryeth a pink and yellow doll shall acquire a sudden interest in INTELLECT and brunettes. For these are a VARIETY, which is the spice of love. Moreover, a woman ts an epicure in love, but a man is @ gourmand. In the love-feast a woman enjoyeth but one course ata time, but a man desireth them ALL served AT ONCE, like unto a farm-house dinner, Yea, he mireth his flirtations, even as he mizeth his drinks and wow dereth sadly why he always awakeneth with a headache. Verily, verily, even thy Father, Solomon, himself had not more than ‘and ENOUGH wives and Brigham Young MAY have practised self-restraint, For, ingcan EVERY man requireth at least TWO soul-mates, One for Sundays—and one for week days. One to amuse him—and one to wait tpon him. If they say that iy all that will save One to save his soul—and one to save his pennies. her, I would,” replied Mrs, Jarr. bands acted Ike they I had in the world to “Well, One for company, one for comfort, one for inspiration and one for @ 1, you don't pastime—and many others fora CHANGE. Selah! and en One to help him make a fortune and one to help him spend it. One for his lighter side—and one for his darker side. 1d pei words of encouragement and con- | Cos C ob Nature N otes. ; ee hat affected him- OMEWHAT to their own surprise our citizens decided on Saturday to “Her @| stay in a Hole instead of promoting themselves {nto a Burrow. Whereat there is much rejotcing, interspersed with doubts as to what they will wo to one. The leading citizens who uncovered e dereliction of our rulers and then went {nto a deal with them to pas a price for thelr proposed Burrow are depressed in spirit and keep ng themselves what is the use of doing things for the people. Perhaps when cool off they will percelve the Results that follow from being In Bad Come Meanwhile the selection of a new Town Counsel by the Saved Selectmen might bo a starter fér the Higher and Better. The ground hog seemed to. know something about the weather after all, Massachusetts, where they have a Public Consclence, has ordered Mr. Mele jen’s railroAd to sell its trolleys, Public Conscience {n Connecticut 1s a Petrified Piece of Punk, Here “gentlemen connected with the consolidated” build a lot of trolleys on highways carefully regraded, largely at common expense, and then unload them on the stockholders of the New Haven Ratlroad after getting a bill through at Hartford that prevents anybody else from building any, Mr, Mellen takes us to and fro in all directions, lights our houses so we can read, takes us out steamboating, gives us places to sun ourselves at the beaches, and, in short, je a tender caretaker of everything we have, Including the State Legislature, Une like Mass., we ara grateful As Orpheus sang Polyphemus to sleep so the silver tongue of Judge R. Jay Walsh has soothed the soul of the editor of the Horsen News. His flerce spirit 1s calm, his mind is ecstatic, he thinks tn rhapsodles, he never heard such ain of inspiration is unloosed, Even his mortgage becomes vith the music of the eloquent pleader. Life is on grand The audience «the editor) ts yed. Another triumph ts night! The triumph siipped a cog somewhere and got lost. The memory of the J Judge's eloquence remains—ani nothing else. Some are saying why not Incorporate Percy D. Adams and put him {nto @ Burrow? i A tall column of smoke shot up over In Oyster Bay, opposite our depot, sf j morning, recalling the fact that a certain ex-alted personage had returned to his Lair on Sagamore Hill, He has, but the smoke turned out to be only one ot Ralph Peterses locomotives blowing off steam. | +++. ( # The Day’s Good Stories ” OL S| Matrimonial Repartee. Me—Yes, Glad I'm not a Mormon. Er | —um—looks a fe Squally over to the S* (in stern and rockbound accents) | northeast, doesn't it, Miranda?—Phila- —You married me for better or | detphia Ledger. worse, didn’t you, Edgar? He—Er—um—yoa, I suppose so, my > | lors ; He Knew How. She--Then what are you complaining | about? I’m no worse than the average AMMA—Gracious, Willie, I don't | married women, I can assore you! M see how you can get so dirty. He (meakly)—Well, if that ts the case, Willie—Oh, It's easy. Come out | all I've got to aay fs I'm mighty giad— In the back yard and I'll show youm | Ghe (brealsing in)—Giad? Philadelphia Bulletin.