The evening world. Newspaper, February 2, 1909, Page 12

The Evening World Daily Magazine, Tuosday, February 2, 1909. MANY eee |, Up In the Air. VDCGIOOOIDOOODOODOOOO: OOOH > + Mark Twain ef | She wee Tard, Published Daily oa sent a New re Iishing Company, Nos. ‘ ne 8 y Maurice Ketre i : + 7 On he Seen of Nene oR, Pres, 8 Park Row x R es: a eee : Le gs é ft Bobecrnin Mats fo Te. ine contest aa s & Especially at Watermelon Time. Ic TOCOOCOCOOOIDGEDDOGHDOODOHPDHGQODOODOOHOGHOOHDOGODHOHAL and ( One Years... One Month... Va Cais eet ni area By Mark Twain. and you would drop that melen the same 4 wouws Ea (The astronomers of Har- as If you had never had any but juste { i VOLUME 49.. tard have observed “pertur- | casual Interest in it I know abeut i ica ied ie vation in the orbital move these things, because this le mot tad } ment of Neptune,” such as tlon I am writing, but history. alt i might be caused by the pres- F te) ITH the application for delay in ace. ofi new planet in the f Seasonal Perturbe, H f ‘ Ale ei é ‘ the ity-cent gas case denied id } hy the Supreme Court of the Rare Hala uae Now then notes ae at Lalas f hein \ } and Adama and Mary Som-| Of August, 166, a change ore } ] States, the Consolidate: : erville. discovered |4N4 I resolved to lead a better tite, we I } have alter No ake through | reformed; but It was just ae well any- } EO eee latintace, Way, because they hed got to having | native except to pay up. The for- and discomfort i¢/8Un® and dogs both. Akhough I was } 1 ; United Ste “48 causing Uran-| reformed, the perturbations did not etop! ia mal order m the United States mia causing Urea Does that atrike you? They dé not | Supreme Court is expected ina tons,” they call | Sto they went right on and on and on | that kind of dis-| for three weeks, clear up to the 24 of few days. Once it is entered the i ft of dls-| september; then Neptune was dlacov- urbance. hai | paying will begin. ta neh WH ath and the whole mystery stood ex- {BP Nobody need lose the twenty perturbations my-| Plalned. Hyg : self for more than f cents difference between th: ico metic th NIN Y | eighty cents and one dollar rate because he has mislaid his gas re site treualy S \ ceipts. The Consolidated Gas Company's books will show. So wil On: rte Ss «{ i their statements to the Federal court. Every man who has paid one dol- : Eee Lap dogs In some NS ; patches In thone « lar for gas sinee May, 1906, is entitled to get back every cent of excess notice that these recent perturba- There was another big decision that the Supreme Court of the considered roma Hale Pen te United States announced yesterday, ‘That is that a trust is an ille ys OU combination in restraint of trade, and that it cannot recover from a as mee custoiner for the value of goods sold him. © perturbating, That is, a combination in restraint of trade is an outlaw, Tt is 3 te the water formed in violation of the law. It exists in detiance of the law. It has $ A Dog's Perturbations. § ing to do with put itself outside the pale of the law. Therefore the law will have eee has leat as so tal none of it. ore any Nepty BaD) MIRE coal and hereditary, These two are great decisions, \ and | and that {s what L think myself. are great decision t from hearsa a, then, | got to perturbating again, ict two hundied |akls summer—atl summer through: alb ight-years” the other [through w and wheres ¢ ne’s orbit, Prof. Pickering 1 think? eon my farm & discover it ina minute If it could ctiout. Lent that significant? Un- te equal toa dog estionably {t is, for you couldn't raise with a ders j n Observa- doubt as {t a t | I # Whatever minor judges may do or say, the Supreme Court of the | n United States is dispensing an A No, 1 quality of justice. a : Ty ra eee aa ey . DOO GOO OOO ODO DUOMO OO OOnOOUOOOOOT CO’ This cighty-eent gas case The Evening World always felt was i eafe in the hands of the United States Supreme Court. That trust | was not misplaced. Kfls— Sayings of Mrs. Solomon —~—. Being the Confess.ons of the Seven Hurdredth Wife Translated By Helen Rowland. The other case was where the Continental Paper Company tried to collect a bill for $56,762. In this case the Supreme Court holds | that a corporation cannot sue to recover on an illegal agreement, and 3 that every trust agreement is an illegal agreement if it restrains trade, | diminishes competition and affects prices, Saloonman Gus Goes In for the Gospel ot Kindness; 14 His Methods Don’t Make Much ot a Hit With Mr. Jarr | Sacrrienme Suppose that every prosecuting officer enforced the law as the Boa Supreme Court of the United States has laid it down, Suppose that the princip! les of these two great | What comes tn here, too,” sald Gus. “I)!ng proudiy after his nephew. By Roy L. McCardell. “Hetyet do !t so I don't get imposed upor Dor QUES i . hurdles and the traibof the ELIGIBLE thing ar, niy Daughter, and observe my wisdom, ; ; ral breath the HUSPAND-HUNT leadeth over many ZS Wy MAD WAYS) don’t play no favor-ites In this liquor | knows his prayers, and how to swear A splendid plan, somewhat e decisions were applied to every WG ZS ‘ OU ain't got but once to live.” store. I'm like Tony, the bootblack. He in German and English, and that's the worked o1 murmurred Mr. J t F : : M J} @) AN) A A Y sald Gus, the saloon-keener,, saya he would sooner shine the aloes way I would ralse him—by kindness should say, however, that Elmer hasn't ahoundeth in pitfatts, Yea, the woods are full of men, & public service corporation and to An h) “and so should {t be that you! of a dozen colored fellers than one and giving him a smack tn the face.” h mustache i hue men are full of strange suspicions; and in the art hI every trust i 40 should treat every-. Irishman,”” “Well, that’s one method,” said Mr. | s oer t A, . Cats rit A kind- Why > asked Mr. Jarr. Sarr, of DOOGING the for ts simple beside then 4 The benefits to the common Geant | Te twelvauscimesmuthe Mitac =stal ate munnpentitio {ites ‘ | T cherge thee, seek not ta be a fashion-plate, for a human “shriek® people of the United States iter Gu, CUE MER R EIN | vou because you 18 good to iif Co yagre eae wa | yiveth werning and affrighteth the game. Verily a BECOMING frock which } noua le is afraid of you because you lick him. |: P Set to et Ne de more to be de. i ‘re, creation which mak 1 would count up to the hundreds Aa he said the last a stolid litte boy sf Sffald of you because you CK NM | Mr. Jarr ! jis home-made is more to be desired than a French creation which maketh oeasattltion fd y M 5 out from the room be i ae Na ASEAS GaRaL you get buey and don't talk tol thee to look lke a bad dream? es) ms of dollars, More re - . +, the glasses i r era’ Schialz nes } of) ? i. tons Gis ayes That's my brother-in-law’s brother's 14.6 to give him work because he !s a ns ef male ie j | Costly thy emile as thy dentist shall make il: for a peart in the mouth j ing men would be employed if g's morning. Fie pease Fan Wy Teva ese red Relat OMIM EUR CRcor|U4ipay niin racH) | Crass aeeareatisl tun caummanon wutDRU te rea at aaveat Nara p ERMAN ATT Tsinet ent OL Cata ON RT Set BTA t ¥ trusts did not maintain artificial ( re “At the same ‘ because he ts kin to me, work or you get fired. Here is a} Cheap thy gloves, if need be, but expensive thy sachet; for a man ‘ prices, because high prices check ——e time," said Gus, “It the uttle boy came forward sheep-| Elmer catching his name looked up | netteth thy perfume confuscd with thy personality and he Knoweth not { N80 E x = shouldn't be that! ighiy, at this point. "insulting rumselier, mind | t from sentiment f consumption, The consumers you should show it! ay aaa 9 “Schurzenschliggel! Hler kommen!" | business, and th e ne oe eu Me ; A MeAaIER j Pa, nai ¥ vi = t your face so dirty fo ; s That . ‘ew thy rings, but many thy bangles, for a musical jingle fascinateth \ ’ would all he better off hecause trus Achar ERT Ley that you are a finn maine bawled Gus, "That means ‘Apron y a lie oi recause trust made prices impoverish them. ‘ign That yea eae nitty ig, fauem. "POE cater, come here!’ sald Gus aside to him even as (he jingle o) a rattle faseinateth a baby. Yea, manicured nails | the Pople wa is r - t + " UME R Abe kk Sa ml ah pave he 1 } h g 7 . . sor py ) ‘at the people want is not charity but justice, Of course not," child a resounding smack on the side Mt Jar, er, the half-grown bar nd PERFECTLY clean cuits are more to ve desired in the world of business || 5 —— See ‘ Wado _| sais Mr. Jar. “Famillarity breeds con- ee i ; ej. tender, came forward, “Don't you get t snowtedge of stenagraphy ; (ation MERA Hates Roeaanbe me ot ip head, and h i 5 itn a aa LT MIEN cy ORT hen) Ghia ceecdl Not Born, han a know tedg of stenography. (a i ‘ jjtoxte began) to HG CNEL) UE . ae ora ; Modest thy hats, yet chte withal; but @ CHEAP COIFFURE is an ay er ° the same time, one of euch dignity and! vand here is a nickel what you should grinned and nodded, Well, (2) Little Swede boy presented tim- | - ‘i ‘ aG BY 6 cop e reserve that there will be no advantage! taye and bay them ecande cucken nee | a ealiaurh iniyout |e | elt before his new achoolma'am, | (Uomination, Verily she that buyeth her pompadour and her puffs at a de taken of an otherwise lentent and deW-! alt da say in Cherman and Eng- | face, Schnurb: sald Gus, “you “What is your name?" asked | partment store courteth ridicule, but a MADE-TO-ORDER switch is “a { ocratic disposition.” lish ank you, mine Heber Uncle good, but n going to give the mistress. | womens crown of glory.” Careless Horse Owners. ithelplanole nlavearandten aeeren 1 ain't talking no politics now,’ sald (i dollar a week." "Yonny Olsen," he replied | nae ‘ 7 7 ne “ Pat \aNea ee Tater eyes and I don't understand what you| The Ittle boy's face changed from ducked hia head and poured) “slow old are your” pursued the| Look nol upon the rouge-pot then it ts TOO red, but delicate thy | | horses should guard, Recently trend had reason “te Spevking. I don't care {f you are aja contortion of pain to one oy, and, f gratitude {n German. teacl | hlushes and thy complesion put on with a fine brush and self-restraint, | ity during s!ip-|to belle raat iay q party.” seizing the kel, he repeated the for- him a mustache twister,”| “Ay not know how old Ay bane.” Plain thy coat, but frilly thy petticoat and of all silk, for a feminine 6 e'ip it that other mice Inhabited the 1 ter,’ y : 7 vy PI ths do not often| h Proc ahelacuiGin a democratic party or t) mula exacted in the two lan ‘ @ don't get too proud| “Well, when were you born?” con-| sisi is cs poetry to the masculine ear i © to | position, bt er w be hanging over this bar hob-| and rushed out g more money. He|tinued the teacher. . ’ horses. Ow en 1 not the horses long er minutes to nosed" the trap away from "Sue a smart Ittle boy, Then, 1 say unto thee, waste membere 6) "Ay not born at all; Ay got stepmoth- —London Answers, and he re- hing!” satd Gus, gaz-lyou how tt to show| nobbing wit sald Mr. Jarr, | » be Kindhearted and | er, ut T wanted "And there ts plenty of Republicans 3 knoweth not last year's left-over not thy si from this ubstance upon STYLE, for a maa ear's fad, nor twenty-cent duck |This dog has ehriledi part | = soit aaa - = = = — —<—<$— rom twenty dollar duchesse, Mut he knoweth a “GOOD LOOKER" when he \ ened. It ta é food {o the h Ouihacn (hav manse é B F L sveth her. ; | alee apenas MATPHEW ea mh ay : Hee in ‘i il A Fl | gh t of Fa n Cc Vy W Ww y i G. ong Verily, a wise virgin hideth her light under a bushel of simplicity, but Nor Jangian Smith; ainnllarhetorien (anit eta ee 0 00 ST | foolish damset aovth forth looking like a HUMAN SNARE. She painteth iro the Bi tae oi YW. KALBFLEISCH her cheek us with house paint and gildeth her hair with much gold. She Is Universally Observed. adorneth herselt with feathers and weareth dangling ear-rings. Yet at is ah ang To, orth sight of her men ery “Help! help!" and fly on wings of fear unto cover. ' M. | Hov xe ! The “Number” Again, | Selah! . As regards r r I x pAAAAARAAAAAARAAAAAARAA AAAS \ Would say tha er Bs ie World ; ’ % 2 teacher nor last § M oat L teacher nor ta raat aa 0 ito gatas uy ' “® The Day’s Good Stories # | six t six i ed forty ands ena | 8 ANSTOUS The Test of True Love. | Good for Him, Anyhow! of thourandths.’ DOUGLAS Lit Quickly, Danger. 66 A UICIAS cried the ardent lover, | ggg HAVE spanked Thomas until Pather and Son A burning with the flame of aj ] can spank him no more! ex-' To the (re (2 | yapturous passion, ewi | claimed Miss Hardcastle, the geo- yn diag : me? Por your dear sake| graphical mistress, to Miss Manners, the and his so; a e the perils of both fire and | mathematical mistress, “Really, my : . ger of the elements! Say|arm quite aches from the dally chastise- : jment of that naughty boy!" Mi EF connot, Arthur!” replied the mald. When you want him spanked again ‘ i giving not so, fajrert one! Over hot! send him to me, then,” sald Miss Man- e jougosiares would I walk for you,'nera, And, sure enough, at 11 o'olock « and longe down precipitous chasms Into the next morning Thomas appeared at the L ; a s er aws of death! Be mine!” door of the mathematical mistress's doug rn Arthur, 1 cannot!" ii class-room, He promised ach m lar 3 Ah, cruel maid! Cast me beneath the “Where have you come from? asked tert 4 es, throw me to the wild) Miss Manners. It didn't ta t taste for foodall these things will I! «Miss Hardcastle,” contessed Thomas, now I think it's f ly for your sake!” “I thought so!" exclaimed the teacher, That 1 have the exp e To Superintendent of Aendemy still I cannot, Arthur!" and, dropping her book, she adroltly in- | ne GI But, really, Altcla,” erled the young | verted the youngster with « twist, and Here's a Nature Story for Yout han—“now, really! Look h Vii sell punished him till the room rang with HI To the Biltor of The Evenine \ " \ iy dog, and buy you a Sunday hat. if shrteks and whack’ The following story wi 1 1 wh) walk out with me~THERE!” “Now, Thomas,” sald Miss Manners, amuse your r 8: A friend living in lations a Artnur,” replied the maiden, kissing} when she had concluded her duty, the Bronx has a tittle dng» : | Im affectionately on the brow, and |""Biest0tnlsa”Stlubbered the feeling become friendly with a rouse This ; inking hee arm in his, “let us go out! scholar, ‘Miss’ Hardoastia, wants tha, Mouse will emerge from 4 hole wi the m \ laud sell the dog!” — ssiswozs)*