The evening world. Newspaper, March 12, 1907, Page 12

7 ere sore emencat| comer rsa “We Will Not Oppose Any Bill Which Will Accomplish More HARMONIOUS RELATIONS Between the Public and the Public Service Corpora- tions.’’—President ane of the Interborough- PAROLES _By Maurice Ketten. at the ‘Port-Oflice At Now York es Becond-Clana "Mall ‘VOLUME 47. NO, 16,689. MAYOR BY CONTRACT. | SUCCE: SFUL Dakota storekesper has” offered” to "govern the town where hie lives, to save the taxpayers money and give them‘a more eflicient administration. The name of the town is Armour, a: small place with a population of a few thousand. At present a Board of Aldermen look after its affairs. They have increased its debt, raised the taxes and spent so much Ka AN you let me have two dollar, dearT’ asked Mo ex Jarr after breakfast, "haven't it to 1 pecting somethings o.-o, 4. : “What are you expecting?’ asked Mr, Jar, Well. we had to have a now wash boller for Monday, and a new tea kettle and some enainel wear and, glasses, and a etew pan and some sad Irone,”’ said Mrs, Jar, . “We can get along without them for a tow days Jonger,* said Mr, Jarr, ruefully: ‘That sort of stuff can't be classed aireng the ‘heoessities of Ife." : 1, they ore not necessities, you thinkT sala Mra Jarr. "Well, you try to run a house without them. I dé YES, | BELIEVE IN- HARMONIOUS) RELATIONS “nid Mrv. Jair, “Tm es 4 “STEP LIVELY TALWAYS MARCH". DID, TOO money:that the 2 will fire departinent, ot-the-protits-hesvill pay-off the-town’s-debt. and siill have a good surplus profit on the About his ability to do this contract he has no doubt. lf the Bat tration ws th eetiicien yi increased. watchmen, Half- proud he paid + oan pupils a’sound “mide over; but it sea city Were and the substitution of business s “caurts, the police department, the departments of charilies and correc- “tions, ‘the jatts, penitentiaries, almshouses andthe like are_conducted-at public expense because there are criminals and Because insane and sick people. tenths—of-the-population-are-now paying for the support of. the foundlings—the-idiots; the paupers and the criminals. A business “Sina eelle would banish them all. Where they went or what be- of them would no more concern the manager came than the future of his discharged employees. odied-idlers vould” be~ put-in- chain—gangs onthe f streets, 4 The- government of every, conducted on sound Beale ss principles, but it needs a store or a railro: ad damental reasons why no government should under. | to carry on any business enterprise unless it is take shodactalternati Jf municipal government avere a busizess und ng “conducted on business lines, erations-to-taiirqads,_gas-amd-the utilities. —-Mresland, a McDonald or some other » | The Dakota proposition Is. 89 ayes, ars irom city’s 5 Und ter the new phn the storekeeper offers to fuir- “nish surety bonds that for ales § SEU Tun solely as a busines: change would go much further; than reform of departme: stem for political wasie. Qne-tenth of any. community” furnishes the ctiminals and <the “Paupers, those {wo classes whose existence and treatment create about In that case every. city should have for its mayor an experi corporation-manager—a-Sehwab, a: Shonts, a Paul Morton, a Ryan, 2 orthy of s warrants are soldat a discount, cond the Schools and the other Rn of any city or town were con- stischa: ta ant erssin-ordinary m. frills and aad upon irtnient would be now dane by ice courts and ihe higher criminal there are poor, Able- The X HARMONY SE TREATAENT, “AUGIE mY MARIUCCTA >= AtKE A SUBWay_ — c- “4 STRAD STRAS Jagr mhed a tear. ,| minds me, you should have a new black sult. nervous that It makes people talk. + xotng-to-tet-meharetro-dottars 2 WE WONT GET H Tite - MORNIN “community should be That is one of the sal tan against-extortion-4r-other it would be simple to extend-it detailed’conducting of otherpabiiz captain-of-industrs “ Tous tho: ght. Its logi the People. t the well of, should stu imp his tall gyoup of features ringing outburst of short mares of the sand should rolacellu with a loud, ponly found e secretary bors on this used for soun-stock? i Notlif the prive insurance, he woulla’t thie onc, of on Tay uld have been put Up In, cans ¢ secretary waa short Not if he desired to keep on b lie that Mr, leading lecturers, or ; 2 and tines, red toe while on the upon’ the esteemed but | este which xerve him f words, and after. re: ke Bie to sensation, “The fri to Gis friends, yeatch fe used by | the Broadway bottlevardiers. fried exgs ‘The walter went away, cate was Juat oUt of exis, dent present Morgan were’ an rit, ‘then I'l take It festated that the ever enlly thal sommntimes— but presently re‘urned with the jnform ng with absorbed interest the same three sof Thaw trial stuff in the morning peper that we read in the evening paper y afternoon, we turn to the other news pake of thé edition and find some- ) who ts appearingwith-such—cemapteuoas success: tir Purple Wampus,’ on Wedncadaye and Saturdays), has a gift of repartee that Js a canstant source 3 He ts also exceedingly fond of fried eggs, an orlental h he acquired while travelling {a the Far East soon aftor-he made his at the-Garltc Theatre (matinees htful bonmot Ia being dotalled among Ti seefiin' that Mr. Swines dropped Into his favorite cafe the other day for-a tate breakfast nnd) with te race and elagance that [are parts of his character, he beckoned tolhim a walter and gave an order for Non that the and butter-cal overcome ‘with uncon?rollable Iaugster by F And it ta said. that this kind of, hot “slaw an sally helps tha bax: omc receipts. ara inostly ose on thet Ik does little goog’ to. kick & Ws. 0f tone we thd branches. gbout #9 sma the solution of the protiem, ia winter, you 2-\e roam to rok eer i), ty th ona of the oandithen the cause for, being | Tate will be, can't Rot an engine, good-fo: Twi get as} x TIAL Bice Jx,a_monguito onthe E COMMUTER. ail attention tothe thievery pdactised tn some. butter ctores, Awhero they welsh the butter 1a a heavy! Wooden scoop, Thies: OOps-are charged to‘you with your butter at Prevailing | Prices. Imagine bow consumers are} ob’ed Wwhen'each pound of butter pays _Wibuse to tie proprietbr, while in re- tur the consumers nie out considerable ‘money for wood! = oO. 7, 8. Hughen and Needed Reforms, “Ke the Sion We that Yughes plans to shea the exer i S xan prices and the tran. of oe Of-Preaident-will-be-toy moigre a re! The mao such hereu ow ore the plac Dictator of the Earth! ‘Yor he will have done more than evory executive, om Prenident to Mayor. who eve AIWES. And it he can also-reduce our Fents to some fair price, let's put his atte up on every street. corner.- Ser!- old Arn, Aad maybe; yore as toy Hy, ¥ wish him all Buccean. NEW YORK SHEEP. \shien walking Upia Agar. of thine ‘Jaeveral officors and With a lady, when te stilrs are narrow for the ge¥tleman to go; 2-Bame_wa} coming dawn. does the gontleman go firat or SMITH, the Inay pre- the man gor: In ascending the stal eedes. In descenaing, first. t © RE VEenty-1W ee, tue File € THE By ening World “The my age sixty years ago_!s present age—how! old am lowa: Let X = my age 60 Than Xt 2-(X— 40nd or |. +100 and 3 X= 140. Add: to both sides of the equation, |X? 2X 4.1 121, -Exivacting the root = i or 2 my age sixty years ago wan twelve, My praent—ege | evonty-two sqvare of 12 | 14, which Isctwice J. ALE Ao square of double” my runtied Bachelor. tor of Ine World: Nai editortal ran y Are Bache- lors?" ¢ good, valid reasons, But I think the pringipal reason ts the unjust and inequitable sot of lawa in reference to the rights of n married man and the quickness with which a magistrate or Judge will hand the “lemon” to the hur- band on his wife's mere atatement. In thin clty all a wife has to do In to make ® complaint against her husband and Maually up he goes. The coming gonera- tlon when they see and hear of what ts in-store for them are c sidestep tt, A Clean City, To the Faltor of The Evening World: ins Tegan) tosthe disptite as to the cleanest city In the whole world: I. as a man who, Aas travelled a iereat deal, | think that Christiania City, of Norway. 's about tho dimanest. A whole army, | of mon Im every night cleaning the| streets, so that every street Je left in| perfect order for the day. In Septem. ber, 194, when an Amertean squadro:, were on a visit to Christiania I heard sallors say- that |- they had noyer been to a cleaner place, WILLIAM FINNZ, Elizabeth, xe Move ino an ELEVATOR APARTMENT= THE SWELLCLOTHE! RAVE MOVED INTO ONE! (You CAN HAVE ‘A DANDY, LARGE, LIGHT: RoamiNETCASH, =ENRVATOR, as YOU_KN : By. E B, Flinn, WE FTER TH BALANCE OF THE RENT- LET ME // 2H, MR. NET=ASH, CAN OU CORN ME $5 TILL HARRY COMES HOME THIS N EVENING? ee 5 MANETASH WILL YOU 6TOP: iN euR WAY [DOWNTOWN AND GET-US [TWO 8) FOR THE. OPERA HO! ais FUP LAY WITH You JusT covERS WHAT WE OWE” YOu, MR.HEYCASH! declare the way girls bang nnd break and weir out thing these days It costa ax much to furnish the kitchen as if Gora the parlor!” let the girl break and bang the old things a litte whit don't Ike to borrow any money mt che pfice, aatd Mr, Jarr. “i can't do it\Y sald Mra. Jarr. “The «iriis: complaining that the “Kitcher things are all worn out and the irons are #0 rusty she simply can't tron wit them, What did you do with all the monay you hadi this week hal to pay my ineurance.’ I lot ‘em wait a month and it was the las said Mr. Jarr, think you mre extravagant In your tnaurance,” mid Mrs, Jarr, “you'll ovp d here I am economizing and eaving my money, and when I'm in mJ Krave the second Mrs. Jarr will Jaugh at me But I te}l you, Mz. Jarr, Ido care if ashe doss spend ofl your money and isn't economical Mike I am, 3 abusas my children! come back -from the grave and haunt her!" Here Mra “Well, “Great Scott!’ sata Mr. Jarr, iq you thi ne I'd inarry again? Hem, after having the best wife in the world? \, th SUT OMe TaKE Sést-tn the nick of time “Oh, you mgn all say that, but you'd marry before the year wan out* anid Mrs, Jarr.: "I-don't bellove you'd go into mourning for me, either, And that re« How could you go to a funeral when you haven't a black suit?’ : “I don't want to goto funerals,” sald Mr. Tarr, , “You don't want to go anywhere with mo, even to funerals, and you act mt I don't belleve you'd go to my flineral um leas’ you were made to! declared Mra. ‘Jarr “Oh, cut olit your fdea of a Jolly time! "sata Mr. darr, shortly, “Ain't you MT told you T had to get some things," sald Mra. Jarr. “Well, I gaye you twenty dollars yesterday. That kitchen stuff Won't thkt that much, will 12" asked Mr, Jarr. “That's the way you always do,’ sald Mra, Jarr, “you give me a little money for my Yery own and_then you take !t all away from me!" “TIL pay you back, honest,” sald Mr, Jarr. ‘Two out of twenty won't hurt for a day or #0. I've Just got Ear fare” : “I naver saw it different,” said Mra, Jarr, minute and then take ft all back the next! What's the use for me to save and try to put a little in the bank?" “You can kerp It out of the bank another day,” sald Mr. Jarr. me have it. If youscan’t glve me two dollars ['li make out with one. have-# ehave-ani-a halr-cut-and_get_my luncheon to-day, you_know."* “T havent any money left," sald Mrs, Jarr, “I bought a little dress patters for myself, a cheap little thing, and I had to get some trimming for my spring hat and some groceries, .and before I could turn around the money was all gone." “Well, you have the money for that kitchen ware, haven't you?” asked Ma Jarr, “No, I haven't,” sald Mrs, Jarr, Ing and Tlet them go back, | Iam. I'm different from whether, I need ‘them or nol. “Why didn't you tefl me so, then?’ sald Mr, Jarr, me waiting, and all for nothing "Ta that all you care for me, that you want to get away {f I don't supply. your extravagant demands out of my own money I'm trying to savet" asked — Mra. J No!" shouted Mr, Jarr, running out, bere are you going without your over ‘To-the Salvation Army's Bulcide Burea you give me a little money ont ry and “Go on and ket T have te “the driver was here with them this morn ery cent I have on things “here you've been keeping att’ asked Mrs. Jarr. yelled Mr. Jarr from the. steps. —“Pdward-ts-the most aggravating-man I ever saw," sald Mra. Jarr_to her self, “There he's run away without taking a quarter I was going to give bin If he could have changed this two dollar bill and only asked me nicely!” ae Chills” and Yorkshire Puddings BY Nixola Greeley-Smith. PE Engen Nation has recentty-pabttshed-a-tong-and I wordy article denying the “superiority” of the Amer- in defense of the fcan woman and apparently American man, 1 ‘The American man needs no defense. The American never been brainless enough to superiority over him. The article seems rather the effort of one Englishman to refute the false conclusions of oth Englishmen who have visited In our midst and then. ritten -omore-or-teas-foottshty- aboutus. ~ Her contribution toward serious Mterature, art and act+ ence ix small, almost negligible, Almost all the best. brain work In America, even ‘n fields where women ate mi d men, saya the English weiter. Mow Peau i tana otctinrs care adie Peellietoelth exert on nipinies where some. mian—of intellect atta judg frent wOrTi listening to fa kept In aifence by tha chatter of igo and daughter, who deem it ther role to entertain tha ee eect a vord, te the “show In successful America, gomewhat overs Fee Nein inn e'te. the eyes of: European audience, But clover and very creditable to the management. Morcorer,-}t-we areto-belleve our latest critic. the American woman has an ___ inner chill, and the sentimental relations of American men and American womea show a lack of emotion, possibly due to climate. The }ast of these extrnordinary statements amazing. I can only accountfor tt by a theory which I have held for soma time, that the Anjerican. woman ts pevyr seen an sho really Is except by. American, I have not met manf Englishmen, but those I have encountered suggested ‘tual resemblance to the delicacy served with the national roast beef— Z, Yorkshire pudding. And numbers of American -women-haye confided: to me the discovery of similar “doughey” qualities in our English visitors. It Ja not surprising therefore that they should diacqver in us.an “inner chill,” nor that they!should conclude erroneously that the emotion the American man Inspirs “and incidentally supply atm with laugh : 5 : ‘Phe reflectionn on the American woman's Itersry: achlevements are scarcely to be taken more crriounly. It 1s the opinion of no inconsiderable number of crittes-that the’ best literature belng produced {n this country ts the crystalline Aira, Wharton's novels betray perhaps something of Engi life, out-Uhey-are-neverthelosa sufficient refutation. of hia criticism. Gertrude. Atherton-and- the Jate- Mrs, -Cralgie,-who- as’ “Jonn- Olver Hobbes" made her fame. in-Rngiand.are other American .women- whose work -may. be-compared favorably with that of any masculine author in America. : Women are, not scientists. But asctentists are not ‘‘Ittterateurs,”” ‘The beat Mterature Je produced 1a the realms of fiction, and in this the American wi The American woman haa never been’ called superior tothe American man except by the foreign Visitor whom the American man had neither the lelsure nor the desire, to bother with. The ‘American woman does not take the extraya- gant praise of one foreign critte any more serously than she does the extraya= Ie longer. 1 need ‘them.— That's the way riter_surmises_ extends {9 our emotional... at Her position, which women all over the world have reason to envy, is fixed by the American man, And both are satisiicd vith tt, ‘ —— The Lay of the Slush. By Walter A. Sinclair. Beer the Alps lies Italy and on the Alps lies snow. Where some long-buriled ven left it centuries ago, \But why go to the snowy Alps to look and loudly gusn— When little old Maunhattan’s just,a pile of slush, slush, slush? The snow contractor figures: up his little wad of dough, The wagons do not cart It off and, hence, “undriven snow.” Then {t's mush-mush-mush through the slush, slush, alush, + Which we pay fo hare."way our good cush, cush, cush, For, the contractor—"plush.”” He ts. not in a rush, He says, “Tush!” as we murmur, “Oh, slush" The muffled up New Yorker tramps Across the frozen drifts, No lecture offers great him when within his door hoe sifta. The deeds of Nansen, Peary, of Finia and the rest Are naught compared to what We do each night to reach our. nest. On skis we hasten to our home and warbleas we go, One slip and we will land beneath the pure white-brown-black snow. Not a blush, dluah, blush as he takes our cush, - Our dough twill go, but not the alush, Bo fust grab a brueh, clean your clothes of mush, He says, “Hushl" when you yell, “Oh, auch” yr Ho