The evening world. Newspaper, February 22, 1906, Page 11

‘MRS. NAGG AND MR. A _, By Roy L, McCardell. ‘0-DAY is Washington’s Birthday Mr. Nage— Waahington’s Birthday! Oh, wet, it has no sig- nificance for me, except that It is a holiday for ‘you and means more work, worry and trouble for me. I expected to go to see “George Washington, Jr,” at to-day’s matinee, although, as I understand it, George Washington was the father of his country, but had no children of his own. “But what I do say is that if he couldn't tell a He I know plenty of men who can do so without undergoing any great amount of strain, ue cs “Whom do I mean, Mr. Nagg? Whom do I mean? Never mind whom I mean! Let the cap fit those who wear it, or let those wear it it fits. You get me so excited and flustered with the way you try to pick a quarrel with me, and about George Washington, too, that I don’t Know what I am saying. I only know thie, that I never get to go anywhere Of fite anything, and a holiday for you only means more work for me, ve- ean86 you always stick in the house and expect a hot dinner just when I hhaye set my mind on getting away from my cares and worries just for an hour’or so and go to a matinee . cargo, you say? Oh, how kind you are, Mr. Nagg! Yes, I suppose h GO, and never hear the last of it for the rest of my natural life. Talk at women finding fault! Well, if they were half ap bed as the men are 66 st would end marriage as an institution. If the least /thing goes wrong, if! his breakfast doesn’t sult him, and he is probebly sick, and has no appetite | from his “dissipation of the night before, a man will growl and bang the \ table, and ‘how! and howl that the coffee is weak as dishwater, and that the ham is too salty, till his poor wife is ready to burst into tears end ask herself 1s life worth the living! f “Oh, I know, Mr, Nogg! T haven't lived with you all these years, and I want to tell you that I am tired of your raging and rowing and swearing {n this house. 1 “Here is a holiday, and what do you do? Why, you come home and sit ‘round and quarrel with me about George Wasshington, who has been | dend a hundred years. Don't talk to me about George Washington. I'll |bet his poor wife had many e sorrowful night waiting for him to come Tome when he was in Alexandria attending his Masonic lodge, or pretend- ing he was. 4 "Ob, you men have a good time, and George Washington was no better than the rest of you, He got a home in the country at Mt. Vernon, where his poor wife was stuck all the time, never seeing a soul except when they had company, and company only means extra work for a woman, while the men sit around smoking thelr pipes and getting everything all cluttered up. “~~ “Oh, don’t talk about George Washington to me! You sre just (ike him “aot in the sense of abstaining from prevarication—but tn wariting to get moe to move to New Rochelle or some other suburban town where I wi? be stuck in the woods, while you telephone home that you are kept in town ‘rer night on important business. ~— "I know why Washington never told a le! glone wasn't invented then. Tt was because the tele- "Don't talk to me about George Washington, Mr. Naggt @are quarrel with me about George Waphington. aie ee ftreat.-me with contempt. Why don't No Rest for John. FARM hand working fela by the rosdalde ‘one when @ clergyman came Toad_and. stopped a ‘LOST ART. OF MINDING. By Nixola Greeley-Smith. © "ond a wike eight-year-old Little girt Se emer ee 8S re a Te NSE eS NS Paes <o WOMEN Ma. TR Kj i a neath a sultry southern sun Full many a year ago Good Deacon Bushrod Washington About the flelds did go, He found a@ cocktail cherry tree. “Fooka! ‘Tie a blithesome sight!” quoth he. Down orashed the tree and down crashed Pa. While earthwcard he was whizzing His lurid language wafted for And set the air to siezing. Says George: “Bien Colonel Mann won't soon Bring from the tree 20 fine @ coon. George Washington: His Birthday. Ananias.”" } a * y t Dry Thursday Evening, Febru rriner daxt's e, aa 5 3. a He shinned the tree and munched with joy. Alack! He wotted not His little George, a husky boy, Had wandered to the spot. Gedrge swung his hatchet: “Mark the way Stanch Bill Jerome shall amite some day!" And ‘neath that rain of heartfelt hacks The cherry tree grew dizzy. Though Pe. the scene of carnage viewing, Yeled “Quit! George heard not. Nothing dotngt vy. “Dé fatn perform « oudden encak While still my joints are limber; TAke modest old John D., I'd sock The high, umbrageous timber. But no! That would be cowardlec, For Pa runs twlos as fast as me! Quoth Bushrod: “Shall I tell you why Yew are uot going to ‘ontch if" TMs tree belongs to Brother Dan, Who beat me for Assemblyman!” 2 3 3% By Walter Wellman. “Add Tather be fust in dere chicking coopst” cate eee oneal DAINTY DINNER FOR WASHINGTON’S BIRTHDAY. good brandy; wet with consomme; set] chopped. This is on & good fire, boll about half an hour. Ten minutes before taking from the fire chop the eggs of the turtle, chop and use ‘hard boiled egg® instead In a stewpan; if the turtle has none, drop and use hard-holled eggs instead. When done, throw away parsley, thyme end BETTY’S BALM FOR LOVERS. ‘i caietea oo Pag iit i acy 8%. 0508 ' } It's the Audience — That Is “The !eF Mr, Winston Churchill’ wrote U “The Title Mart" for practice, a8 has been said, we wish he would | Practice on some one glee, The Anglo- Amertenn mixture at the Madlaon | Squdre Theatre 1s another dose of “s0- ; clety’’ that may Interest the few, but ; fot the many, Why can't these am- Sitious playwrights of the soil get out- wide of the society circle? Two of them have come this week with the @ame off bag of tricks. Mr. Rupert Hughes pinned a tmgedy tall on his comedy dog and feft us womlering at the breed. “The Triangle" lacked bal- ance. ‘The Tithe Mart’ lacks orig- inality, Its story and its characters are as old as the jokes that the English crack at otr expense, Mr. Churchill trots out the tmpecu- nicus English lord; the talkative aeimp in bidck-and-white checks and a9 many "B’ joves!"; the ambitious American mother, who won't be happy UN she gets it; the healthy heiress, and j Se dorky papa, Are we never to be | Hid of them? | Lord Tredbury {s the best of the It. He ts tiond and ‘huemn, thanks |lorgely to Mr. Frank Gilmore, who ‘was harvested from “As Ye Gow” for the part. He comes over marked by ‘Mrs. Blackwell for her step-deugtiter Lady Tioknor, however, sends! him word from Newport that Eaith ig raw-boned and red-haured amd hoy- Sold in © Title Mart.” | Mart," unless Ht ts the audience, |” All along, of course, Mrs. Blackwell imagines “Regsy" to be just whist she is looking for, and he fy cing overtime supplying ‘the “comedy ole « ment.” ‘The fat father and a’ cow storekeeper, whose common joy tn Lt cock-fighting, do thelr beat to me Mr, Churehiil's none too brilliant The brotherly love of authors ty trayed at one point, ‘FFONJOTT-PAGET REASSURES ARTHUR HARE, enish, T> escape ‘her, Tredbury in- duces. his apish companton, Reginald Barking, M. P., to take bis name and ith wrestle. in Japan~ she throws him by a 4 English poblenen see Mr, Churchill's A man with an eye to the future migtt learn a lesson from ‘this, ut ‘Tredbi ‘Ise only to Jove the more, Edlth guesses his identity getting him doused. She ts painfully weigh | practical in her jokes. ‘The canoe saves her from golng to dinner with “Regay,” and enables her to sit with ‘Tredway, who drinks real champagne, May M g Fangy ow to}, Call or send by mall:to SON FASHION f atk, Bend: tea opnn “I expected to find you unati confemes Tredbury when “Dolly” to be Edith. James,” ske retorts. “The Title Mart,” for much. OHARLES ———— a Man Will— Go without a deal. ‘ Get desperate and commit larceny. * Quarrel with his wife ang break up- a heme. : Take @ chance, by leaving the office’ Rick paying a fine for expec: " Stand for any amount Jostiing at (HEcStange tickets tor rood. yausgs - ; | wile portgemance to taka’ tn some cheap emo) Tes of etiquette‘ and offend the rar sex dy | ich © PASE here: Care Ae meme: an hour endeavoring. wie, "than elon who doce Monae ae erate the delights and pleasures of % Posen Jacket—Pattern No, 528/, U, Bo. Hh West