The evening world. Newspaper, February 16, 1906, Page 17

Mrs. Nagg and Mr.-- By Roy L. McCardell. BLL, awe Nagg, I only hope that Alice Roosevelt will be “happy. I hope she isn’t @pending the day before her marriage in tears, as I spent mine. Of course I got lovely presents, too, and every time the door bell rang I used to wonder if it would be another cut-glass celery dish or a silver cake basket. I got eleven cut- Blass celery dishes and nine plated cake baskets, ane then plated cake baskets went out of etyle and the silver plate people would hardly al- tow anything in exchange for them. ung bride, but little does she think f the scrrows and disappointments (hat are to be her ; -=tion when she trusts her future amd happiness to a man who does not realize the value L of a young girl’s love. ‘Of course I was crazy to get out 4 root, and Papa was drinking meérvously at the time and Mamma } ‘was threatening to lecve him, and I was the only tie that bound them; but ‘we must not speak harshly of poor ) Papa now. He has gone to his long home, and perhaps we did not under- Stand him. A’ :- wanted was to be “left alone and not hectored and badgered all the time, like Mamma | Used to hector and badger him. | ‘Phat is why I made up my mind that, | come what might, I would never say {ogne harsh word, that I would never find fault, that I would suffer in si- lence. I see now that 1 was wrong. 4 man of your disposition, Mr. Nagg, needs some one who will stand up for their rights, and I would be bet- | ter off this day and more thought of if I were like some women I know who are constantly scolding and pi fitins their husbands to task. “Of course what I say doesn’t in-| | terest you, and that is why I never | Say anything, but if you had a wife PFN LMI a TERRI Oh, life seems fair and bright to al The Evening World’s Mome Magazine, THE LOG OF NOAH’S ARK OG oWreseset (Copyright by Walt MaDougall.) * © * This Log Was Kept by Noah's Third Son, JAPHET, and Is Hers Turned Into Versified Vernacular by ALBERT PAYSON TERHUNE. * * * ——eeeen Friday, Feb. 16, 248 B. C, Friday’ Evening, By Walk McDougall. February NOAH GETS ACQUAINTED WITH THE ZOO. The Aard Varks, Tapirs and Emus, The Otters, Wart Hogs, Parots, too, And more headliners from our Zoo. Says Ma (to give the talk a handle): “I thought a Tapir was a candle. ’ The Tapirs raised an atoful fuse ] Just to work up the humor crop, | And begged: “Now, don't make Ught of us!" |b sMMike Mire, Dubb, who doesn't speak to | Mer husband for days, or like Mrs. \ Steyver, who runs off to Lakewood ‘whenever she and her husband havo elightest difference, and they say fiilrts and carries on dreadfully. then she is rich, and can afford I am lucky if I have to meet my household buy eome little cheap once in a while. 1 a@ mistake, and it would by far if I had mar- it N. Ketchem, who used to house so much trying to le didn’t actually pro- IT never gave him any and he afterward be- officer in the insurance com- made so much money that Ged ee hus to pay it back should have married some one more pride. You voted for It and you were not even in- 4 to the wedding. I could have you how it would be, but you listen to me. My poor Papa always so honest in his politics! we seen men come to the house ve him money in large sums for them, but he always voted one that paid him first, be- ie Behera Mrs. Ter- was Ing about going to igton to the wedding. She has issed a fashionable wedding she got such a cold and was BE aut payers Hid } : i iE SETH. 2ET i Pi] 38 ie if 4 8 zee? Pa wartted comp'ny and made To bring a few up from the hold. We brought them in the main saloon. ‘irst they felt shy, but ttked ét soon. We had the Ostriches and Gnu outside the church at the Goelet wed- ding that she told me she didn’t have handled so roughly when she a the heart to go to Washington, be- cause there was no telling about how ladies who wanted to stand around outside might be treated et the White House. “T suppose they will have a regi- ment of Rough Riders trampling over ladies who simply stand outside with scissors in their hands to cut a piece or two off the bride or bride- groom’s wedding clothes as a sou- venir. This country is getting worse than Russia, where I am told the Cossacks drive people away with whips who gather around the churches at royal weddings. Is it sny wonder the Russians are always eating candles and throwing bombs, for what this country is coming to I don’t know. “If Alice Roosevelt had any regard for my feelings she would ‘have been married here in New York. And so I say if she does marty a Congress- man {t serves her right, Old Mr. Bunkle, who lived near us in Brook- lyn, was a Congressman once, and always bored people to death about it. ‘What are you laughing at, Nagg; how dare you laugh at me ‘0-DAY we took account of stock To count our Zoologte flock. Says Ham He—Would you mind if I walked along with you? She—Oh, no, indeed. I'4 probably for- get you were there in five minutes. bold | The Aard Vark grunts: “You otter stop!” The Otter squeals, with accents punny: “It's real aard vark to be so funny!!" 'Twtet all these puns absurd A man can't sandwich in a word.” Love Makes the World Go Grace—George proposed beautifully. Maud—Well, he ought to by this time, He proposed to me six times before he'd give up. The Emus answered, with a screech: Don't try Ham-sandwiching youn speech.” I’a repartees: “My son, you lose! These are mere efforts to emus. ~ You must admit that in our Zoo There's lots of humor that is gnu” Ma butts in: “Shame! The beasts don't know No better; but don’t YOU talu so! I feel like weeping at the thought That (since the pigs on board we've brought) It needs must follow—'scuse a tear!— The Bridge Hog's ancestors are here!’ At that the Wart Hog ewooned away And wouldn't speak again alt day. The Tapir started to gevite How “Ourfew shall not ring to-night!” But all the rest protested so Pa drove the tchole blamed bunch below, Remarking, with a heartfelt sigh: “In future ages, bye and bye, When mildewted puns or jokes are sprung And dreary verse is spoke or sung, People can truthfully remark: ‘That chestnut started in the Ark?” I wish that Pa'd turn off the ratin— It gives me water-on-the-orain! (For further particulars see Monday’s Evening World, this page.) I'm going to be out. ‘He—May I call this evening? She—Oh, yes; I'd love to have you. "Round o wo «2 By Walter Wellman He-No. In _ business. threw him over. She—Is he disappointed in love? An hetress Have you ever heard a sissy? They talk of love, of how tt thrills their very ‘souls; of how in the stillness of the midnight hour visions of a lovely face rise wp tn their mind’s oye, But love, dear comrades, 1s but pastime for fools, and | Mey are bugs, gentlemen.—The President of the Bachelors’ Amusement Society. HERE is a time befere and after all our love affairs I when we agree with this very wise and therefore exceedingly young man. But while Love may be the Pastime of fools it is precisely those never felt its divine foolishness who alone form the brothei hood or sisterhood of “‘sissies.' i When we think about love, when we argue about it, | we are pretty apt to reach the conclusion that it fs an/ injustice to the guinea pig to be numbered among the least | GLEAIRT ane) SOME THE PASTIME OF FOOLS. | By Nixola Greeley-Smith. who have, in not being in love, but compared with it 16 shrinking and modest as the first en The telry ‘Tinker Bel @Fewture because she shows her 1 who, when told that she is an abanddned little and re ‘Woman I'm proud of it,” voices the sentiments of our entire sex. *” Phere is a certain Diana fearlessness, yet witha! a hardness about the woman Who “hae not loved, a fine, wonderful pride in her immunity. But the woman foves has a finer, more wonderful humffity that enabies her to take honor te may come to her lightly, knowing it, compared with her love, to be of such worth, to wear dishonor as @ coronet, to smile at death, Pp ® »-Mven ta the sombre tragedies of passion, those of Clytemnestra, of Francesca [Ge Rimini, of Hester Prynne, the women took probably an unalloyed pride tn thelr maidens den love, as if they had been flashing the im the oun. in ita intensest form does not even feel the whip lash of scorn, and I @lways questioned if the sinful wearer of the “Soarlet Letter” felt hai wish Hawthorne atiributes to her. oe She might always have aolaced her- PAGE <> WOMEN DOG SWEATER IS LATEST KNITTING FAD. yening stitches to within 13 stitches of the end, bind off 7 and knit the last 6 - Work one inch in this way and then lace the atitches that were bound ais Sag band (kL ’, Fi three Ae cen. Ly each tye ryt aN but- "Eolreo Feuer OMITH f BEAUTY HINTS. By Margaret Hubbard Aver | How to Get Fat. ~—HERE is the best way tof | gain welght | Absolute freedon: from care and anx fety. At least te: hours sleep out o} every twenty-four In addition to this naps during the day if possible. This] sleep must alwa: be natural. Nothii 1s wo tad for th appearance and gen eral health as sleep Induced by anodynes or narcotics in gny form, The diet should be Uberal and should consist largely of food ocon- taining starch and sugar; potatoes, fresh, sweet butter, milk, cream, fruits cooked and served with eugar, all veg- etables containing starch and sugar, such as corn, swe potatoes, beans. peas, foods of the macaroni and spa- ghetti kinds fish and oysters, tce- creams, desserts without pastry; plenty of out-door life and a moderate amount of exercise. Sleep tn a well-ventilated room. I do not believe any one can gain flesh if there is an internal disease; certainly not if there fs any tendency to dyspepsia or liver trouble. For Blackheads. S —Here is a remedy for blackheads. . Salloylic acid, 60 grams; lard or vaseline, 50 grams, The sub- stances are thoroughly blended by stir- ring or beating. Apply at night; wash off in the morning with warm water and apure soap. polit SE Sunday World Wants Work Monday Wonders HILD ‘"Gallops' doesm't quite W keep up with tta name, it goca along at an interesting wait and finishes neatly, It ts not lkely that David Gray's “horsey” play at the Garrick will ap- peal to a very large public, for the Feason that tho fellow without a red com: to his back and the woman who hasn't a hunt ball on her social horizon may find {t as hard to get into Its “at- mosphere’ as It is to get into society. “Gallops" 1s by all odds the most “elasay’' play of the season, but. Nk the hors that preferred the cellar to the Galloways’ dining room on Tues- | day night, it has tts good points. What the play needs most of all 1s the whip. The earlier scenes move too s'owly. This, however, is more the fault of the actors than of the author, GUT TARY 2 an Fee La }- CHAS, RICHMAN, AS Lidesseadahity TROUSERS : Speed is the one thing lacking in] Mr. Charles Richman's performance of the steeplechase ‘hero, Jack Hemin way, but perhaps he feels it necessary to give virtue’s own reward a chance to overtake him. Heminway risks his neck and his reputation to win the steeplechase and Nell Colfax, who loves laredeviltry on horseback. She sec in him a hero when tho worst horse in the nelghborhood throws him over a rarden wall, and she gets down on ier knees—nice lttle girl!—and sews u 1 rent in his breeches while he stands without hitching. Miss Frances Starr did this job of lain sewing last night simply and skil- ily, despite the fact tha: half the women in the aixiienco were not only iughing in their eleeves but giggling ehind thelr programmes. Nothing else worthy of mention hap- ened until the Jealous Randolph Gor- Garrich Stock Company Makes a Gocd Start in “Gallops.”” insults that it was @ relief to see him seize the fellow by the throat and hear him say “Put it back there!" To please @ capricious widow Hemin- way keeps up his amiable deception as & rough rider and goes into the steeple- chase. The race 1s described by excited spectators from the top of @ cagch, and it seems Heminway would have wor had be not pulled his horse into @ fence when Gordon went down just in “OH WHY CANT THEY HAVE STEEPLECHASES (WITHOUT FENCES; ASKSGRACE FILKINS, front of him. Turther information és to the effect that he followed up this @ublime sacrifice by Gragging Gordon out of the way of the other horses. In- stead of being grateful Gordon charges Hemioway with having fouled him, hoping tn this way to escape paying a bet he bas lost. Miss Colfax, believing the story, turns a cold and decollete shoulder on Jack, but just es that much-abused gentleman is about to leave, more in sorrow than in anger, a groom who saw the mix-up comes for- ward and transforms him into @ here. All that Jauk has to do after that te to ask the girl. Mr. Richman isn't a good lar, but he plays Steeplechase Jack in a way to make you like him. Mr. W. L. Abingdon makes no attempt to hide the villainy of Gordon, Mr. William F. Hawtrey scores a good-sized hit as the honest groom, and Mr. George Holland is mildly amusing as a bishop who doesn't know his own rector from a horse called ‘The Parson. A widow who 4a constantly being called to the telephone by a long-distance admirer is played by Miss Grace Filkins with a refreshing sense of humor. Miss Giarr has an unaffected charm that grows with the play, and Mies Grace Kim- ball is well groomed and capable as Mrs. Galloway, at whose home the hunt ball and most of the trouble occurs. brought a disagreeable raw to a 1 x by snatching from Heminway's oat a flower that Miss Colfax had put here. Hi way had taken so many rplexed young people can ob- | | jtnin expert. advice on their tangled jlove affairs by writing |tera for her should be |BETTY, Evening Wor! |box 1,364, New York. He Only Bows, | ar Betty: i fie man one night and he was awfully kind to me and took me| home. Since then he just bows to me. | i introduced him to some of my girl riends and he talks to them all the) time. I love him very much. How can 1 regain his love? CG. 0. You can't possibly love the Young The now stock company organized by | Mr, William H, Reynolds has made a good start In “Gallops."* CHARLES DARNTON, BETTY’S BALM FOR LOVERS. _ %)man on so short an acquaintance. Be nice to him when you meet, but don't run after him, He Lobes a Diborcee. Dear Hetty: AM dearly in love with a divorced Woman and she returns my love “ts huve known each other going on twe vears. My parents obtecw oo t quadntance, saying that she is old gnough to be sy mother, and they also don't believe in divorces. ALP. ‘The objection on the score of age isa . valid one, but the prejudfee against dtworce is not intelligent in this age. ‘Wait until you are old enough to judge a for yourself if you are not now, ~ May Manton's HE fancy blouse a fs one that is in constant and cer a demand, and thia one 1s among the most charming and attractive that yet has been seea. in the illustration it is made of crepe de Chine in one of the lovely peach shades and is combined with cream colored Imce and ap- plique, while the belt is of chiffon velvet in the same color as the crepe. Appropriate meteriate are, however, more nu- merous than ever this season, for there are a great many new ailk and wool fabrics of- fered with the opening ot the spring and the walst sutts each and every one. Among the prettiest is what is known as “*plee-ted"’ crepe, which is: exceed- ingly attractive. and whtoh shows embrold- ered dots in self color over the surface. The elbow eleeves will con- tinue all thelr vogue throughout the spring and summer, and al- ways are pretty when becoming, but the model includes long ones also, 80 there is @ chotce al- lowed. Again, when . lked, the fulness a: the shoulders can be ar- @ or 18-4 yards 44 inche Pattern 5279 {s cut in sizes for a 32, Bew to Obtain ‘These Patterns ways epecity size wanted, Call or send by mail to THE EVENING WORLD MAY MAN- ‘TON FASHION BUREAU, Ne. 1 West Twenty-third steect, Now L0Gk, Bend ten cents tn coin or stamps fer eack pattern ordered, IMPORTANT—Write your name and eddress plainiy, end a} Daily Fashions, Fancy Blouse Waist—Pattern No. 6279. ranged in gathers in place of plaits. ‘The quantity of material requined for the medium size ts 81-4 yards 21, 3 yaris wide, with seven-elghths of @ yard 21 inches wide for the belt, three-quarters of a yard of all-over lace and 4 yards of lace for frills, or 11-8 yards of all-over lave when long sleeves are used, 34, 84, 88 and 40-Inch bust measure. ci a ES oan a Tae La,