The evening world. Newspaper, July 31, 1905, Page 11

Yaller, the Newsie, Tells of Joys of Outing and Games He Attended. By Roy L. McCardell. HERE wuz Uh? At der Monahan annual outing at College Point. Chee! TI got so much cream soda an’ ginger ale Uh nearly bust! Me brudder bought de ticket ‘ouz he tinks) Monahan's goin’ ter git him a political job wot he won't have any wolk to do, an’ git a lot of money. “He paid five bucks fer de ticket, but he couldn't go ‘aus, he wuz wolkin' in a printin’ ink fac'ry, an’ all his shoits wuz doity, an’ he wuz afraid he'd make Monahan gore to coum on his chowder with a doity shoit. “Uh showed de ticket I'd swiped, an’ de big hick at de ang-plank hit me a kick and took it from me, De ‘Soslashum wus all marchin’ down to de dock wit' white hets and wit’ canes, “Whilé'de big hick wussen’t looking I jumps fer de boat, behind his back, an’ hides hebind a hundred casea of beer, “Den when de ‘s'colsion atolted I ducks out while de ginny band is hittin’ up "Tammany.’ “De big hick grabbed mo and sed he'd put me off, an' he wanted to trun me fm Ge woilter, but Mr, Monahan was passin’ and I tells him how me ticket was took, an’ he says ‘Let de kid come along; he’s al} right.’ “Den I sings ‘In de Shade of de Old Apple Troe’ fer em and showed 'em a few Pranklin street fancy steps, and say,.I made a hit. Surest t'ing yer know, a4 Gey made me mascot of do ‘soshuation, and I catri¢d de bats and handed Jwhen dey was playin’ baceball—de Fats aginst de Leans. No kids ts allowed zs phowders, but I wuz on dis one, and I fell down in de sack race and holt me hands—bot’ me hands. Den I sang fer ‘em some more an’ danced an’ dey trew (money at me till I had t'ree dollars. “Where 1s de cush? Aw, me brudder took it frum me when I got home; he et me have tenpence to get papes wit’. “Sure, I'm de maecot of de Monahan Assossheashim. I kin go to all de/ wders now fer nuttin’, J don’t care fer dem moonlight outin's when 90 many ls go along an’ all der time wantter dance de two step wit’ de big fellers. “Don't'me sister go on dem? And when me mudder makes her take me, don’t Phe makes me chase meself! Huh, gimme de chowders wot only men goes on, fem xoils make mo tired. “When we comes back at night we has a perade t’rew de district, and I'm SHtin' in de wagon wit’ de calcium ght and boining a stick of red fire till we fits in front of Monahan’s saloon and breaks up. “Chee! I'll holler molder if T can’t go to de nex’. “Uxtry! Uxtry! Evenin’ Wolld!"* Little Willie’s Guide to New York. | Washington Heights. HEN jorge washenton diskovered washenton hites he nev- ver dreemed that his diskuvvery was desstind to plug allong the anti raice sooiside gaime of his illustraited suxesor mister roozvelt. untill washenton hites was diskuvverd noboddy but the happy: poor and the sordid ritch cood aford to marry in nu yoark on ackownt of the high rents but when the subbway hit washenton hites a lot of howses were bilt thare and the renta were 80 cheep that young married cupples cood almost aford to liv thare if thay saved munny by walking to and fro between the flat and the offise whitch was no grate stunt if the offise wazzent ferther sowth than the battery. probbebly when thare are enuff young cupples settled thare the landlords will get bizzy with the rents and give fokes a chance to revive! the oald probblem Is marrij a falure. washenton hites is the annex to fort forge for when fammilies go away in the summer and shut up the flat and ut the cat in coal storlj a jentle band of boy berglers perkolaite the Lr ick and get bizzy and thare is a plezzant supprize awating the fammily when thay get hoame and find evverything hag bin lifted exept the morgi | bn the planno, if it, wazzent for reel estaite men and berglers and the) pubbway washenton hites wood still he repprezented on the map by a blank ped like filadelpia to indickaite Nothing Dooling. good oald washenton A. P. TERHUNE. Tobacco Politics. OBACCO ‘has a great deal to fo with the governmental affairs of the world. The French treasury Teport of the tobacco monopoly for 191 shows a clear profit of $71,000,000. The! government receipts from tobaceo tnx in Great Britain Inst year were soon” 000, In the United States the Govern ment collects $45,000,000 from tobuccu internal revenue taxes. In Italy tobae:o selling is @ government monopoly, and wil yield a net profit this year of $45,- 000,000, and Austria-Hungary expects to collect about the same amount. Through the clouds of emoke a good many ships of war can be discerned looming up. Pointed Paragraphs. A’ ‘woman can keep a secret If you give her enough chloroform. A g004 many so-called business pointers turn out to be disappointers. Recklessness of a young fool fs only purpassed by an old fool's obstinacy, ena man doesn't have to be a philoso- pher in order to discover that all rich Hirls are handsome. ‘Time may be money in some cases, ut many a man with nothing but time managed to starve to death. A woman may be afraid of a mouse, but: she isn't afraid to undertake to me @ man for life who is twice her }#E HE SSS SSS DRC ARRAS SSSSY Ss SASS me Magazin By J. Campbell Cory. oe. Monday Evening, July - O$H9HHSH9HHHHHHOHHID OOST41HSHOHDOHOHPOOHGOGS DADRA Neen aetee iru stam oes. Troubles of His Own. 93600 ‘Timkins—So that mining enterprise of yours proved a failure, el? Simkins—Yes, a total failure. ‘Timkins—But 1 thought you said there was a fortune in it? Simkins—Well, mine’s in it,—Chicago News. oe “Ths trouble with society,” said the opinionated person—- “The trouble with society,” sald the ar Some 2 2 of wa the Best # Jokes & of # the w Day. Je Je man who Int but how dia you find it \eigt om teltir | Ne—She and I were talking about Miss Prim, whom we both knew .to be -two, and she spoke of her as a “young woman."—Philadelphia Ledger. ping it.’"—Was: “You're her br “Weil, In a way aren't you?" “By marriage? Respectable Deacon—I_ wish .“'—Cleveland Leader, | young Cenon Mayberry weren't obliged ® tc preach to such a small congregati¢ Nell—Miss Giggeia {s over thirty. Frivolous Widow—So do I. Every that|I want with the shovel, Jimmy?" time he said “Dearly Beloved” this morring I felt as if I had received a proposal—Smart Set, oe ie “Shall I get you the shovel, Mr. Tight- wad?" “What tn the world do you suppose “Sister sald if you went with her you've got to get busy and dig up."— : F™ the morning ti the gloaming William ‘Travers ie Jeromestng, By Walter A. Sincla’ Dick" Canfield, whom Jerome had fined $1,000 te getting it back flourishing Saratoga gambling den.Ne ws Item) On the tender ex-bar sinister and other awful things. Of dark punishments he mutters as he gayly smokes and flutters’ From our fads to high insurance as though on a pair of wings, Pausing long enough to say some fancy phrases Nght and gaysome, With the wisdom of an oracle whene’er he opes his lips. But with one another matter ho can’t drown the constant clatter— Drown the clatter and the patter of those Saratoga chips, He may talk of fads and fanctes, violets and knee-high pantstos, And his own unending struggle to hold down the restive lid, But though William may endeavor, with keen words and hot shot clever, There remains the “common gambler who onée robbed a drunken kid,” How if he just had the chance he sre would jail that man. Just fancy), ’Tis a busy life and sometimes great big memories have slips. © ‘ Politics is one long battle and perhaps it drowns the rattle— : Drowne the rattle, rattle, tattle of those Saratoga chips, Nowadays it is a vogue, a red-hot fad {n Saratoga, To attempt to buck the tiger when you find him in his lair, And there surely is a grand fleld for a man like Mr. Canfield, Separating coin from “kids” left wealthy by some millionaire. That art lover and high liver is much further up the river Than Jerome once said he'd send him ap the county’s fresh-alr trips, And Jerome's so busy tacking he can’t hear the noisy clacking— Hear the clacking, smacking, stacking of those Saratoga chips. ee Answers to Correspondents. BY E. F. FLINN. HICAGO-It 1s costing Bluobcard Hoch one thousand dollars to five foun ( weeks, or two hundred and fifty dollars per week. And in jail at tiat, This beats the rates at the highest-priced hotels by many a doliar. MIXOLOGIST—You can procure i Sais for a Martint’cocktail ing to the clerk of the Court of Spectal Sesstons, Lifesecion YONKERS—Your query rerseathi Rusktan cheers ts timely in view of Envoy Witte's expected arvival this week, The Russian “Bangal" looks lke this im print—"Zxutrpnijigeca"—and ds repeated. three times, same es three American cheers. Go up on the roof and try it. cee WING LEE!—Your suggestion for a national laundry in Washington ts « g00d one, ‘The soiled linen of official Washington ought to keep tt busy. cer) LAKEWOUD—The discharge by John Dough Rockefeller of his Lakewood superintendent and his reduction of several laborers’ wages takes that much ‘talnted" money out of circulation, The affected employees shouldn't feel 60 Bore after all, oe 8 TAMMANY—1. Mr, Murphy should take the Japanese view of it and feel flate tered over Jerome cailing him a lobster. 2 Platt and Depew are Japanese lobe sters, having lived long, belng happy and both healthy, o 8 e BRIGHTON—"The Senate !s not the road to the White House,” says « Washington newspaper. With the Burton und Mitctell cases in mind, it does seem as If the Senate road leads to jail. But the saloon business 4s the road to political power, all wight! Vide, Murpey. oat siae Foley, Culkin, et al, ANXIOUS—The French bankers hives oleeen the dough-bags to Russia. Looks like peace for sure now. \A Family of Forty-nine. 8 a family record the following A would be hard to beat. In the town of Thurso, England, an old man, elghty-seven years old, still fol- lows his duties as superintendent of some flag-stone quarries. Among the workmen he has 7 fons, 6 sons-in-iaw, 29 grandsons, 4 grandson! wand 2 great-grandsons. orty-nine members of one family, all connected with the saine trade, employed in the same works and living In the same district, is something decidedly out of the com- Conundrums. HEN does a woman sneeze three W times? When she can't help It. ‘What notes compose the most faverite tunes, and how many do they compose? Bank notes, and they compose (four) for-tunes, What is the difference between love ana war? One breaks ‘heads, the.other hearts, Where should you feel for the poor? In your Peek et, to What kind of wie animals are al- Houston Post, lowed on the lawns of public parks? mon, Dandelions. w WOMAN’S + CORNER wow ow in Which Much Will Be Found to, Interest }tomesMakers to a paste, adding tho cream as neede Season with the paprika or geese Pepper, if preferred. . Spread the cheese over the top and brown in a hot oven. The Right Way— To prepare a fomentation fe to place a towel across @ hand basin, with the ends hanging over. Put on this a double plece of flannel and fold the towel over from tho sides. Then pour on bolling water and wring by the ends. Take the flannel out, give it @ shake, and apply Ughtly at once, Mayonnaise Dressing. UT the yolk of an egg into a bow! ‘with a saltspoon of salt and beat until light. Add one-half tea- Spoonful of dry mustard and beat again, Then add olive oil, drop by drop, until it begins to thicken, Next a few drops of vinegar and the same amount of lemon juice. Con':nu pipcent until the mixture has u: ittlé more than a gill of the’ of) Just a sprinkle of cayenne pepper. A Sunshine Puzzle. Horseradish Sauce. DD to six tablespoonfuls of grated horseradish the yolk of.one ese and half a teaspoonful of salt. Mix thoroughly; add a tablespoonful }f good vinegar and then carefully a pastes of a cupful of cream whipped @ stiff froth, If the horseradish is be in vinegar omit the tablespoon- hie of vinegar and press dry the horse- To Avoid Moths. _In the summer lay tallow candles basi furs and no moths will go near em, it is said. = anaes cua? chopped bolled ham, two tablespoons Parmesan cheese, oue-halt yup cream, paprika pepper to taste. Dut bread into slices one-quarter inch fick and with a French cutter into Mreles. Fry to a delicate brown in tmoking hot deep fat. Pound the ham Housewife’s Thumbnail Cyclopaedia. Beauty. Now Seeks f "Bive ot OCIBDY ts seeking beauty trom Vegetables. complexion froin olives of more food In an hour. Eat just what you avtuaily need. Don't cat alone, But, if it should so happen that you are obliged to take your food alone, thero are food thoughts which should go with It needs warm food ft needs iced food for the appetite. for nourishment, for the palate. The principtes upon which the health and beauty advocates work are some- thing Ike these. The leading. principle {8 that food must be taken often, Don’t | oat unless you are hut: is one motto, | Don't continue to eat after you o filled up. Don't eat just because you} s are afraid you will be hungry before skin ttled vegetarianism tor threo the next meal. Don’t overload your! sand finally gave {t up, directing stomach for fear you will feel the need | thut all work done during that time bo How Is She Going to Do It? ty girls of Chicago and New » giving the luncheons of India. ill them the health and beauty Health and Complexion in Vegetables destroyed, Gladstone tried {t three days and gave it up. Bismarck wanted to try it, but never did, King Edward thinks it good, but not for himself. All the American stateymen have had a whack at tt, but few have stuck to it. For the woman who camnot exercise much the quickly digested vegetable Met is ‘ideal, For a girl who ts low-spirited, vege- tables, ruts, olive ofl and fruits lite the splrita, For a woman who wants a peaches and cream complexion, cooked grains fro best, ‘Dhey clear the skin, For the woman with a dull cuticle the all milk and vegetable diet will act How to Put on Your Gloves. VERY woman should have among after it Js half-way on and start af; E her toliet table fittings a good (If it fis tently it the west, ane glove stretcher and a little rice| “#tens the last button and trusts to the Gradual stretching of the kid over the powder to use in caso the glove has not| wrist. All of this’ she does in the heen fitted at the store. After dusting the Inside of the glove | (he street car or elsewhere in puplie carefully with rice powder the tidy girl] ‘The tidy girl removes her glov: en draws on the fingers, leaving the thumb | Infinite cate, She siarts by loos once until they are all firmly in place, mak- | the fingers just a trifle at the tipe, t1 th ing sure that each finger is put_on ab-|she turns the wrist down and draws the solutely straight, seys the Chicago| glove wrong side out carefully, not Journal, Jerkily, If the finger tps If the glove is a trifle small and worke| properly loosened, the move, Swill not on very hard, tt 48 well to remove it{ turn all the way wrong side out, May Manton’s Daily Fashions, BLOUSE WITH SECTIONAL POINTED YOKE-—PATTERN NO. 5,087. The variety of prete ty blouses is very near- ly without Umit, but, as no woman ever yet war known to have @ eu’ ficient number, there always a demand tov each new one as tt ap- pears. Illustrated is an exceedingly alttractive model that is simple enough to be laundered with ttle difficulty while it is dressy enough to be sulted it all afternoon Im the case of the orig: inal the material is Persian lawn with sim ple lace Insertion aa trimming, but every one of the lovely cot- ton and washable ailks ‘The , yoke, which i cut in sec- tions, Is @ feature and forms the points that Mie a worubbing brush. And that ts the reason why ihe health and beauty diet Ginners are popular. It was to 4 relgning beauty of London ‘What shall I take for my com- plexion?"’ asked this beauty, in dis- trees, “Sam a sight.” “Take olive oll,” said the physician, “Ldve on dt, live in tt, live with lt, Eat it, drink it, dress your food with it, and don't do without it, Lubricate your system," Tho beauty did as she was told and Meanwailo are always attractive, ‘The quantity of mar terial required for the medium elze is 42 ) yards 21, 8% yards 2 or 2% yards 44 Inches wide. Pattern 5,057 is out =. Soin sizes for a 32. HM, 36, = 88 and #0 inch bust moasure. How to Obtain These Patterns, Call or Send by Mail to the Evening World May Manton Fashion Bureau, 21 West 23d St, New York. fiend 10 Couts in Colm or Mampe for Bach Fetters Ordered, = |” DAFORTANT—Welle vour asme sel siden dle ah, Bae sacred portals of her room and never. ‘oe y, q os 4 vA