The evening world. Newspaper, May 22, 1905, Page 10

by the Press Publishing Company, No. 63 to 63 Park Row, New York, ) Bntered at the Post-Ofice at New York as Second-Class Mail Matter, »NQ. 16,980, _ SPEED MADNESS IN THE STREETS. It is to be hoped that District-Attorney Jerome will confirm the ort that he is to appear in court to-day to conduct in person the cases | ainst owners of automobiles who have been held for overspeeding in city streets, The Judges in Special Sessions have lately imposed some rather ivy fines for offenses of this kind, and have announced that hereafter Ro clemency will be shown to men arrested for exceeding the legal speed | Fines have proved no deterrent, as was evidenced again on Fri- day, when the chauffeur of W. K. Vanderbilt, jr, arrested the second | “ time for driving a racing machine at its “minimum speed of thirty miles an hour,” as his counsel admitted, nonchalantly tossed a $100 bill onthe | ; “Glerk’s desk and “departed smiling.” i % Apparently nothing short of a term in jail will cause these speed, s to observe the law. That there is need of sterner measures fs by this table supplied to the Chicago Record-Herald of May 14 fts New York correspondent: Auto casualties in and about New York since January...a-++ +793 Victims killed Crippled for life Penalties other than fine: * Autos In the State j Increase last year .. Of the sixty-two fatal accidents fifty-three of them took place when the owner Of the automobile was in the car, 1t is an awéul list which presents these facts, ut the record is Just the bare truth. In twenty-seven of those fatal cases the Owner was at the wheel. : Are not these cases of manslaughter as well worth the attention ‘of » the District-Attorney’s office as was the killing of a race-track gambler? Two men were shot to death and many seriously hurt In the strike in Chicago yesterday. Mayor Dunne says that “should the rioting nd” there is “a probability of troops being called out to maintain or- .” A great Mayor is Dunne—for “bunk,” EQUITABLE GRAFT. fm minute and comprehensive grafting which overlooks nothing and lets no source of revenue escape the Equitable Society could instruct the Board of Aldermen, The revelations of Equitable graft must bring the Bhish of shame to the most hardened Aldermanic cheeks. ©» The barber shop, the restaurant, the cigar stand and even the boot- black stands are sources of illegitimate income to Equitable officials and their parasitical relatives, No source from which the shavings of per- | quisites can be planed is neglected. Borrowers other than officials and >> their favorites must pay to the legal relative of one official, to a broker who is the son of another official and to appraisers who are minor satellites, All this is at the expense of the policy-holder, for there !s no one else | ¢ at whose expense it could be. All the money that is received comes from | 3 he policy-holders, and necessarily all the money that 1s expended and | $: verted must also be theirs. - It is the universality of Equitable graft on which the grafters rely for | 3: freedom from punishment. It is because so many powerful and dis-| 3 guished men’ have profited from Equitable graft that the efforts to bring | ¢ a compromise and to hush the whole matter up are expected to be| > i. The policy-holder’s suit, authorized by the Attornéy-General, the dummy directors and making specific charges against them, is ly the onty obstacle to this scheme, ene 0906 O04 It Is not strange that the leaders of the “party of great moral’ ideas” ispired to suppress “The Love Letters of a Boss.” “Tom” must have 1a sad old rogue, if Miss Mae Wood reports him correctly. ‘A porpoise has been caught in the Harlem River, No doubt should be cast upon this story because a Tammiuany district leader was the captor. The porpoise was hooked while fishing, and killed by a shot from a re-| volver, It was five feet long and weighed over 200 pounds, | This is another argument against tilling in the Harlem River and run- ning the streets and avenues across on solid ground. Such a cha ge in upper New York's topography would not only put a stop to the fishing in| the Harlem, but it would prevent any additions to the stock of entertain. pr that there should be some statement in connection with it that is true. his rule is complied with by locating the story at a place which really ex- ists and where fishing is possible, If the Harlem were filled in such a tale! as the catching and shooting of a porpoise would lack even the water for the porpoise to be caught in. * “On the other hand the filling up of the Harlem would stop people from committing suicide by jumping off the bridges into the water. Very| 4 E few ofthe would-be suicides would jump if they knew they would land on 4 ~~ solid ground. Thus, many lives would be saved. A great deal of pro- fanity would be avoided, not to mention the time and money saved a the railroad drawbridges that frequently “hold up” trainloads of imy ‘passengers were rendered unneces But would New York be the same without the historic Harlem? It fs a debatable proposition, The People’s Corner. | Unmertted Unpopularity, Mo the Baltor of The Lvening World: Lam earning $18 a w Out TZ pay #4 for rent and ‘or food, for 1 | w take caro of my mother, who Keeps |! e for me in a little flat, T ‘only $7 a week for clothe spundries, We can 5 it it leaves few ‘ext where I work have the habit of ing drinks, cigar, &c, 1 cannot d such luxuries, and as I won't ace @ drink or cigar when I can't re- urn the hospitality, 1 always refuse, us, I am unpopular and voted unso- Is this falr, read- |! t the 1. ft there is, and stingy. pat 1 ke a social time ax much aa | BGR by lone and it it a bo Feat Electroented, Bere a Ea | To.the Raltor of The Hvening World: J. 8, Mo, Binh on Brooklyn streets, he Editor of The Evening World: Was Mrs, outed? Place hunged or clectro- G. CG. W., Freehold, N. J. A PORPOISE IN THE HARLEM. a stands, the Po 4EOdS When Jerome Goe ee er i Booed | Sia he Ge ee of he VC on lo be ag ed A ~ DODOD-EHHFYHHPDHHHOHHOHD OHHCH9SGHHSOSOOIDIDIHHHOPDHHID HOG HH HG HH POHOPHOHDIMOD. father Knickerbocker’s T we roublesome Incubus. her Q. Why? A ast slot machines, ¢ we d advertisemonts 8 paint on thei, Q, What remedy do you suggovt for the slow service In the Subway? ing Harlem fish stories. It is necessary to any well-constructed fish story |A. Make peesenge ‘. Q. Who actually shapple, the city did, It had to “dig a step lively. WILL HE CHASE 'EM WITH VOHN DOE SUBPOENAS Wetters from Evening World Readers ‘| ANOTHER BILL % THROUGH i What right does the Brooklyn Hallowe'en Is Correct, It ge the streets. with | To the Kuitor of The ning World Between Front and| Which 1s corre ) 2 NSE poe JAM iy d the digging of the Subway? Vitascopic-Stenographic Interview wit have A, Certainly. the up the glaring white tiling im rounded with tin frames with real gold) only IAT ts your name? A, August Belmont, | cost. Q Woat is your business? A. Well, T ean dig you Q. What ebout Jonn PB. McDonald? A, McDonald? McDonald? Tf think 1 tunnel at your expense or mine, lead a cotillon, lend we had the ne on our payrolls, 1 money on good security, or give you x Up on a hot Q. Where <s John B, MeDonald now? A, There 1s some such man ne dn the third, with the Vreciand crowd, and do you know, bah jore, he bas the impudene: @. bo you wy company shoull dig all the to want to dig more tunnels for other companies! Q, Do you think you should have control of all the subways that will be built in New York and Brooklyn? A. Certainly, Q Why? A. Because I have solved the labor problem, I will employ natural-born excavators from the W + | Q. What do you mean? A. best news Digger Indjans, River, will they not?) A. Perhaps, but tunnelling under the myer is a A. Between ourselyes,| horrid bore. @ Why are you taaking war on the bookmakers at Belmont Park? T vn" for the $30,000,000 the Subway | SA t “6 THE THE AUTOS +R F. G. How MANY CHILOREN HAVE YOU? — ne ¥: " How, MUCH ARE You WORTH? | ages 2) WILL HE ASK MAEM FOOLISH QUESTIONS? wit He DO- THE HANNAR WILL HE, GiVE . “u FUAS Aibenca? SS CANFIELD. EATMEN TS FOH9OFOEH0OOH$H009HO00600 By J. Campbell Cory.: @. John B, McDonald and the rival company will tunnel under the East | a OO oa eDOLE am not making war on the bookmak \Metropolttan Turf Asso nN. Q. Why? A. Because I hate the yery name Metropolitan, It is. the Metropolitan Ratlway crowd that is trying to undermine me in thy subway business Q. Why don't you open subway racetracks In the bowels of Manhat- tan Island? A, Because Jerome might uxe too many questions about it. | Q, Is tt trne that the Rapld ‘Tran- Mt Commissioners have received lot~ Stroet eae WELLL 22, Wivitys 7 7 ‘With Real Goid Paint on Them.” subways? district, That's all, Thank you! “The simple Hfe and frengled finance, do not go hand In hand." “Neither does a frenzied life and sim+ ple finanve,""—Cleveland Plain Dealer, fannish sort of qirl.” she, really?" She used the televhone to- day for the first timo in her life and sho didn’t giggle once,"—Philadelphia Press, Lk op Mother—Willle, you must stop th a a a "t sl ie h August Belmont. # By Roy L. McCardell The Man By Martin Green. 667 SPT." sald tho Clear-Store Man, I “Uat they are talking of passing 8 Jaw prohtoiting doctors from Wearlug whiskers.” “Such a law,” declared the Man Highs er Up, “would be a foul blow to the medical profession. ‘lo legisiata the woods off (jo maps of our sawbones might be capstitutional, but {t would be cruel, The right to sport alfalfas {s one of the perquisites of the healing game, “According to the reports the war om | M, D, follage 18 caused by belief that « set of whiskers on a doctor Js part of the microbe transportation system, But a doctor I know who has a beautiful outit of blond aeoltans ends that microbes cannot find a home in the of a medical man, ays he washes his whiskers overy washes his face, w time | ably true, since he couk it, Also he keeps his combed and siiky, Doctors who enter themselves in the whisker stakes when they graduate from the medictl school are Immensely proud of thelr face trim- mings, Como to think of St, 1 cannot romember of ever having seen moth eaten whiskers on a doctor unless it waa an old man, out of practice and ade dicted to wearing Niagara: "It they mako the doctors dispossess thelr whiskers, the next natural move will be to make them shave their heads, Certainly if halr on the face, Washed every ume the do ablutions, {9 @ microbe co: on the head, which ts rhampooed ¢ a week, and maybe not th. Mable to suspleton, like the eons," May be some day the t so long as » profess din the ‘ os.al { & great ise, partake it does the man, says a writer authors Military offigons 4 suff less from the ck of Md fever than did those whosy 4 were rote latier eems well nigh Imposs! one of the two must be done, mularla and ye the hog, and horses, « do they all carr: ooo Dental Oddities. T 1s sald that the ‘Talbetans possess I the most perfect teeth tn the world, . although there 1s not a single tooth- hrush in the whole country, and no form, of cleansing the teeth {s ever practised, ‘The British army council has decided to discontinue the experimant of pro- viding recruits with artifctal teeth. ‘Tho soldiers would not pay for their t as agiced, out of thelr pay of twe: five cents a day, and when the mili authorities tried to compel t! go they deserted, ( ers in general, I am only after the “Why Not Subway Racetracke?” fers threatening them with death {f the Lenox avenue extension isn’t opened soon? A, I have heard go, Q, Have they ever told you that they expect to die when it is opened? A. Yes, Q, What do they expect to die off A. Old age, Q. Who do you think {3 antagon- izing you in the matter of your get ting franchises for moro subways? A, Dr, Parkhiiss, Q. What makes you think Dr. Parkhurst objects to your digging more * A. 1 havo heard he complains that 1 kept the town wide open > for four years, and atter night tiyned upper Broadway into a red light > —— Ga at # The Laughoscope. oe that annoy him, I's the answers he can't give that make him mad.—Phdlae delpiia Ledger, eee He-Do you remember school friend, Sophy Bmythe? She—Yes Indeed, I do, A moat abe aurd-looking thing, 80 silly, too! What became of her? le-Oh, nothing, Only—I married y-—Punch, your off Higher Up. : :