The evening world. Newspaper, April 7, 1905, Page 18

Da at Even ing World's Said:on the Side. April 7, 1905. PITH DH H9 HODOHH Do: DO2O4-DDDO.DODDH-ODS ©49O4.94D4-H904 9O095-.HOOHOE-0 FOH4 DO-9OODS HHEGENGOHNHHEDOS ‘ANew * +! All the Comforts of Home. ‘Comic Series No Bohemian Dinner for Smiths; He Prefers His Own Table, Magazine, Friday Evenin oe: The Man Higher Up. No, 63 to 69 Park ow, Now Tork c ys ‘s Satarca Raa rest ones ae Naw York fas Sccond-Class Mati Matter. D' VELOPM Ey at _eplouroanien 4 By Gene Carr. 4 iBy Martin Green. ae a yur referred oO be Bs - w...NO. 16,985, fore In tiis column as likely to COME UP TO (™ SORRY, BUT SEE," said the Cigar Btore fOLUME 46, se seene conser eeeeee pit ~|Jeopard thelr lotr Same de- THE CAFE VAIN A 66] Man, “that President Roose velopment in progress nd, ac: FRANCIS AN HURRY HOME HAVE A BIT To al WITH $2 velt has got them going down in the alfalfa country,” “He'll get them going anywhere he goes," asserted the Man Higher Up, ‘We're a pretty primitive people yet, That's why we've got all the rest of them skinnea, We've been so busy ymaking the mazuma and spreading $ jout in the last few years that tho P lcountry gradually drifted into thy » |control of a bunch with the concrete, warm, generous disposition of a stor- age house for the preservation of furs, “Our public men were losing their ) |nerve and the people were beginning to get !mpatient. Theodore Roosevelt jumped in with his usual luck and bee gan to talk loud and wear a slouch hob- 3 always eis none, to the London serves: wadays * Ro tot non, if th the sldedoard cupboard, pp them- selves before getting to ¥ ; and they usually sup heavily on anything that the larder contains.” Latest local In- stance reported from a Lexington ave: nue shoe store, in which remnants of mince ples, along with empty clar whiskey, botties, gave evidence of midnight feast by cracksmen, eee THE OCTOPUS WRIGGLES, ‘The artful dodger Dodd, chief solicitor of the Standard Oil Company, les all allegations of illegality or dishonorable actions on the part of Rockefeller or his company. ad his is what Dodd is retained for i bahar But the encouraging thing is that the octoyus writhes under he harpoon thrusts of the man with a conscience anda moral sense. The » despread demand that Mr. Rockefellers $100,000 contribution to for- gn missions be revurned, as a gift “not brought to the altar with clean ; has obviously got “under the skin” of the hitherto silent and im- Be pervious head of the Standard Oil gang. ? This public sign of sensitiveness is alone worth all the words that have heen uttered in protest against allying the churches with the bandit ‘‘com- _merclalism” and robber monopolies of the day, bi A NEEDED PUBLIC IMPROVEMENT. cording t r—so let his plea pass for what | Books of the Gas Tryst declared by {ts counsel to be ‘so plain and clear that even a baby can understand them,” Can't say as much of Its bills. oe e And also there is the hoary Westfield, the pride of Staten Island, to confute ‘COME ON) \ SE A Good FELLOW the Osler theory of uselessness after A sixty, Beh oe Res Ant!-tip bill now a law, but there are 3 CANT DOIth 11M AFRAID I'M MY DINNER IS LATE FoR MY DINNER! & 4 r By the establishment of a series of east side markets the pure milk 3 oH fnd food problem woulg be much more easily handled, The city is pro- ) eaviding parks, new school-houses, playgrounds and in general Is seeking to ; etter east side conditions. The public markets are at least as essential as laygrounds and parks, Pure and cheap food would benefit the public bak more than anything else that the Health Department could do. At present the east side gets its retall supplies of food and milk’ from {thousands of small dealers, some with stores, some with stands and many ©qwith push-carts, who have no way of keeping their goods from spoiling and who in their purchases from the wholesalers and middlemen are je puided nore by the price than by the quality. So long as these individual "dealers are scattered over the streets and in many of the tenement-houses » efficient supervision is impracticable, Even with the large number of in- i SY spectors now at work it is not possible to inspect all the dealers constantly. yy In constructing the Delancey street and the newer bridges the city has % @cquired for piers, abutments and approaches much more iand than will be }/ Mecessary for bridge purposes after the completion of the structures. This fand, for which the city has already paid, is excellently adapted to a pub- flc market. The only additional cost would be for the construction of sanitary buildings. This cost would be amply repaid by moderate rentals, Lia Who will project the first east side public market? mt A NEW “AMAZING MARRIAGE.” "4.0 _ Society in all its strata is still buzzing over the announcement that salich Mr, Stokes is going to marry poor Miss Pastor. '\. The differences in race, religion, station, culture and environment + between these two are very unusual—but what is the true basis for mar- 2° rlage? Is it not mutual attachment or love; physical fitness and mental ‘esympathy; common interests and kindred enthusiasms? All these this young couple seem to have to an unusual degree, Let me not to the marriage of true minds Admit impediments, : ¥ ays the author of the mysterious and matchless sonnets attributed to " Shakespeare. The minds and hearts of these two “workers for humanity” ‘Y are better attuned than is often the case In the marriage of either million- sire men or very rich girls, Mr. Stokes has amended the courtly saying of chivalry, Rank has its obligations, so that to him it reads, Wealth ashas its obligations, If he has chosen for his wife the woman whom he * pegards as best fitted to help him discharge these obligations, who shall eo@ay that he has not done wisely? ‘ All honor, in this generation of idle, rich and spendthrift young “ren, to one who has the courage of his convictions, the fervor of his faith ¢n@nd the daring of his devotion! ri) rt if: WR AN EXPERT'S ADVICE, When Chauncey M. Depew talks to young men on the sclence of | Seating and drinking his advice is well worth heeding, He has lived almost Be year beyond man’s allotted time of “'three score years and ten,’ and is ‘| ..stil very much “in the ring”—a living refutation of Oslerism, He has Probably attended more banquets than any other American, and is still hale and hearty, with a clear eye, good complexion, springy step and an enviable capacity for both work and fun. To the graduating class of the New York Trade School Mr. Depew ‘eald The experts tell me that more people die from overeating than anything else. WMever eat enough and never take a drink unless you need it. © The Senator is not one of those physicians who do not take their wwn prescriptions, It used to be his habit, and probably still is, to eat a ‘pimple meal at home before going out to a public dinner, and then merely to “toy” with the mixed, rich viands of the banquet, and “cut out" the dwines. In this way he foiled the demon Dyspepsia and avoided the un- pleasant discovery that he has a liver, It takes moral courage to rise from the table hungry rather than t gatiated—to decline dishes that, no matter how tempting, do not “agree” jwith you—to avoid the clogging “luncheon habit"—never to take a drink Wunless you need it’—and generally to keep in condition by a strict and sane regimen. But a serene and healthful old age pays big dividends on such an investment. _ With the Odellized Insurance Department investigating its own delin- ‘quencies toward the Equitable Society and a Harriman-Hyde committee cay vestigating its “financial management,” what more can the public or the Sf policy-holders ask? With two women dead from heart failure in one day through climb- 5 Ing the long stairways to the elevated stations in the Bronx, is it not about ‘ytime for the Interborough to put in elevators? ‘oe While the police are quarrelling among themselves crimes increase. u The People’s oh Metters from Evening The Reduction of Mortgages, Corner, World Readers sting to know what dis- ® made of the entrances proposed lines. Are they to be the Editor of The Evening World: Hurrah for Goy, Higgins and the cau- ‘ which gustafhed him in his good work; "Aly Kiuy and obstruct the Vyin reducing the mortgage tax. May all | ftewalks or uated on private ‘ in the future be showered upon| Wah agot jn, your paper a OF ERTY-OWNBR has the grateful thanks of |siiep py of widows and orphans |” ad Lnatre, Ralest, ut the State of New York whol, 0... MF Henntes fecipients of a trust Income, she | To the Editor of ening World: tax on mortgages reduces thoxe| What are words composed of f the luxuries of| the same six letters in the following Dr | onrne: so Froposed New Sub- his — gra. trong; those who will regard it as better to risk arrest than encounter that look of disappointment. es 8 Bul nad a Ptltbourd, Hall alsn Aad a hoard dill, ‘1'he board bil! bored Bill so that Lill sold the bill- board to pay Ma toard bill. So, after Bill sold his billboard to pay Ms hoard bill the board bill no longer bored Bill.—Yale Raposttor, eo 8 8 Criticlam directed against the cen- tenarian by Barry Pain to the effect thatthe man who Hyes to be one huns dred “mistakes quantity for quality."’ “The centenarian's life is not life at all,” eaya Pain, "It is sometimes no more than a bad habit, ‘They live long- est who live least.” ‘The theory ts not exactly new, Yet the man who adyo- cates “a short life and a merry one’ In his youth seems as eager as the reat of them to prolong {t when the time arrives for him to die. o 8 8 San Francisco woman who has left her fortuno of $600,000 to a streetcar motorman may merely have Intended to reward an act of unusual courtesy, cee Report from Oxford that the American Rhodes scholars there find one thing lacking to their perfect happinese—the absence of female society. “I don't Know thow to spend my time or my mon- ey now" said one student. Co-education has charms to soothe the student breast, for the absence of which even the clas- sic halls of the world's most famous university cannot compensate. ‘The hear of the exilo parks back to the college campus where the girls are, oe Noted recently that the sllk hat was losing \ts former vogue, "Why Is it not worn more generally?" asks the Tadlor and Hatter, “A silk hat gives a tone and character that is not en evi- dence in any other headgear. It is the garb of civilization, and is an indlca- Uon, if not of opulence, at least of re- wpectability, A man ine silk hat will try to live up to it,” ° “Aren't rcs Carrying things with a high hand?" “Sometimes ti's a high, hand," answered the South Ameri- can President, “and then again sometimes it's only @ vlujf.” — Washington Star, o 8 Reformer who recommends ‘bed mak- ing, sweeping, dusting and other forms of housework” to young women as superior to other kinds of muscle cul- wire, concludes by saying: "Girls soon Ure of the apparently meaningless movements and unproductive results of the dreary and monotonous set gym- nastle exercises to which they are 50 often condemned; but, as a rule, when the many benefits of housework are explained, they take to it kindly, and it goon becomes second nature to them.” Not #0 sure of that, oe New indicattons that Settlement work {a still a direct and quickly traversed route to poctal standing. “phe days of thrift have gone b} says the secretary of the Woman's}, ‘Trades Unton ,League, 'East-side girls would rather have big hats and ball dresses than a bank book any day.’ Stil a plentiful supply of the latter, however, according to the latest savings bank renorts, . Philadelphia woman who eued for $10,- 000 for four kisses Imprinted against her will has been allowed damages ot only| $200, or $75 a kiss, In a Cleveland cuse of similar nature the Judgment was $00 fore single kiss, Question will arise aa to whether the difference of value was due to the greater chivalry of tthe Onto jury or the superior quality of the Klas, oe 8 And now the Governor of New Jersey goes on record as favoring a tax on bachelors, Movement for the curtail- ment of bachelor’s privileges, begun in the Weet, 1s assuming serious propor- tions, Though of the weather toe may bray And praise its sovthing style, 1 wouldn't put the cod wave flay In moth balls yet awnile, —Wushington Star. Los Angeles astronomer who has dis- covered a nebula In the heavens so ob- scure and remoto that it "makes only a white blur! on the photographic plate reckons that it fs “large enough to con- a thousand solar tems such as Rather staggers the human mind pve of the immensity of Jin this easy, off-hand es of tie professor, Again the girl and the burglar, with the honors of the encounter with the girl, as usual ery Delver in literature of other days finds this text im Burton's "Anatomy of Me} for applicati toples: "There factors, who, when by fr they ha extorted all th pressed whole provinces, something to plous satisfactory almshoune, bridge, at their last end, or before, pers haps, which {s no otherwise than to \ ‘Gown & rolleve tom” that there was a decided difference of who cut her estimate $025 on each kiss, whioh the ungailant defendant declared] was worth nothing at all. billty of Juries, which In cases of this kind haye been known to award dam- ages ranging from $0 cents to $10,000, Ie such that justice will not prevail in regular sohedule taking no acoount of| changed, de Bergerao called tt, it sometimes has Se Papp QURE JUST IN TIME YO HAVE SOMETHING TO) | Ear, = SMITH, WITH ALL THE , |COMRORTS OF A » |HOME, AND WHAT HAVE we! TWORDER WHAT THE Boys ARE DOING Now! POOLE OPPO DOE PORE LE Y The Worth of a Hiss. By Nixola Greeley-Smith. a LAE eA Conner) HE latest vale subtie potson of infatuation along with uation of the it kiss, accord: A Kiss ts nothing In itself. It may ng to a Philodel- be everything or less than nothing, ila jury's deci For quite as many people have been disenchanted as enchanted by a Kiss. Tk Is foolish for juries to think they can determine the value of a stolen Kies simply from looking at the lady from whom 4t was filched., The only ren! test would present difficulties in the jurors’ homes and would render them individually Hable to sult, if the plalntift chose to press her claim, A cold Kiss—the adjective refers not to temperament but to temperture—is 4s bad as a coll potato, and vhe un- fortunate owner of this too frequent Spinton between the lady and the Jurys| variety of lips. should give damages \rather than sek for them, Tt is {invossible to vel: from ivoking at the most or the least tempting pair of lips What thelr kiss will be like, and Ag this {8 the only method permitted to the consclentious juryman the legal apiece. decision was réashed afer listen- ing to the testimony | of a Philadelphia; matron, who sued) husband's part- for $400 for! nur kisses forcibly flehed from her un- willing lps, le will be seen The talll- valun of @ kiss fs and must remain for- ever indeterminable, —— od What Did She Mean? thelr decisions anent kisses until a Wy a) the chance charms of the plaintiff has been established, Juries have an {dea that a pretty woman's kiss !s worth more Intrinal- pally than that of one il favored, Why? The first may be more delightful in itself, but the second |s rarer and more exclusive, The value of a kiss, anyhow, depends altogether on the spirit in which It le given, It je the sort of thing that wo value less when given than when ex- Under properly romantic con- ditions it is Uke the quality of mercy and blesses him that gives it and her that takes {t—or vice verma, as the case may be, “Brush of a bee's wing that makes time eternal,’ as the love-lorn Cyrano Guide to | ies Were you ever in a Dime Mu- seum? @ bee's ating as well and carries tho | Heh! Miss Bentley. from statieh other people S She—I thought so, fire ferrybotes to. plide between the How It Started. fownd that thare hoald them ahd are stil asking tha but 80 far the no who were trying have dissperced ,. hoams and begun thare moske: for summer ® ny hav to te toa! since it karried Kollumbus thare, the new botes were bilt and after thay were all done sumone exclaimed in dia- may Nowthat we have the botes whare shall we put them And it was sudenly We cant turn @ poor bote out of doars on an nite lke this to starv in the bnow but what can we do and thay ing pashently for ekko Ing for lack-of a slip and the fokes ps 80 as to be reddy DINNER 15 OVER ICOULONT Wait ANY LONGER FoR you. ‘TART GANG, YOu WOULD GET HOME ON TIME AFRAID MY HUSBAND ae NE LARS, WILL BE Little Willie’s New York. STATEN ISLAND FERRY. O menny peeple tride to get away flend and so menny had a morbed cur- ryosslty to gO thare that it was dee- alded to bild @ fine new fieat of rappid- replaice that: stanch ald vessle the chatkemackson that has batery and kassejton 80 azent a ferryslip to the mannagers sald t Ikweschun and wat. to anser It Ww botes are shivver- to leev statten fend peecefuly to thare tubbing the rust off the mannagers may grourid the shacke- it towether for an~ I 3| $| YOU'D SHAKE Gene CARR ip Ka SOo1oO OOOO ; [school % |main guy of the advance bunch, Othe » |ers are Folk, of Missouri; Douglas, of > lasked the Cigar Store Man. | hat and tell the people that they were all right, He framed up to what the people figured an American citizen ought to be, and when they ran him for President against an echo from > |Hsopus the distance flag fell on the echo, “There {sa newschool of politicians 4 coming to the front and the old gum- shoe boys are paralyzed at the new- methods, Roosevelt is the Massachusetts; La Follette, of Wise ‘cousin and @ lot of minor performers who are going to be stars before long. These men have adopted the >» plan of golng after what they want by the direct route. They know that the people have the otes, They keep hammering this fact into the people and that 1s why they are mak- ing goed, “Mark Hanna was @ great politician Dut he didn't know the people of this country as well as Roosevelt does. I was present on one occasion when Senator Hanna, then Chairman of the National Committee, advised Roose- velt to shed his soft cowboy dicer and wear a silk hat and a frock coat on his speechmaking tours. Roosevelt didn’t take his advice. He stuck to the political overalls and he won » lout." “Do you think the atyle of hat a man wears has anything to do with his popularity with the people?” “To some extent,” replied the Man > Higher Up; “but what really counts is the way he wears it.” ———— THE WAS TROUBLE. His Wéfe—But I don't think, Georgy, that you ought to object to mamma, Why, just ‘think, if 1t hadn't been toe her, you would never have tad me, Her Husband—Huh! don't try to ax- cuse her by saying that, You make me hate her worse than ever.—Phiia- deiphia Bulletin, Mrs. -..- By Roy L. "Do you think young Mr, Hyde will lowe hte posi- on as stockholder in hie insurance | company? I think 3 it js real mean ir you, Mr, Negw, to join his enemtes, ike Col, , Wilkins has done, by mak: ing trouble simply because you are In- cured in his COM: Roy L, McCardell. ‘Mr. Smig and Mr, Ladyfinger both say that young Mr, Hyde {4 a charm- a | ing person, and even his hgpses wear |! violets, and he don't speak to com- mon people, and gives lovely entertain- ments, “Suppose he did change the cost of his entertainments to his insurance com- pany? I wish I could, because tt costs Mke everything to entertain. You have to ask a lot of people you don't like to your house, and they come and gobble wp everytling you have, just Uke Amanda Seadaday and Mr, Gradiey did the chicken palud the last time we had an affair, and Susan. Terwiliger just Korged herself on tea, and all Susan Terwiliger has ever done for me Is to ask me to call and maka myself per- fectly at home, “I don't want to bé one of the fam- ily, that t#, of Busan ‘Terwiliger's fam- lly, because to ibe treated ns one of anybody's family {s to be treated to the worst of everything, “I ike to be in company. where peo- nle I am visiting put on a smile and their best clothes and cook extra things, hecunse I am treated lke one of the | Nagg and Mr.—— McCardell. ... fanily in my own home, which means Tam found fault with and subbed and s ‘ed at and blamed for everything! Tt 1s all right for a man, Mr, Nags, Ho can take his hat and rush out if things don't sult him. Although this reminds ine that vou do not run out of the house Hke you used to, and, just as my dear mamma says, ‘If a man doesn't run out of vhe house when you say a few words to him it isa sign that he doesn't care what you say and don't love you any more, and so stays in the house with his book and hia pipe and never saying a word, while his poor wife's henrt ts Oreaking.’ “What do I want, Mr, Nage; what do want? I want some consideration, Want some interest taken in me. J wane to be talked to and criticised, If oritl+ clsm Js needed, although It isn't, I want to be treated ax ff I wore a human, being, that's what I want! “What can you do, you say? Why do you ask that? You know what you can do! You can be kind and not intere rupt me when I am talking, ¥t tem't often 1 say a word, and although young Mr. Hyde did not invite us to any of his affairs that may be the work of people who are jealous of us! ‘Mr, Ladyfinges knew him at college, and says thvy called him ‘Caleb’ there, 40 he must have been a nice person, “But Jue becayse 1 like him you Laie opnosite sidvs, I don't believe in life {nattrance, any way, because when poor doa* papa dicd his life insurance wean't patd on wycount of some technioallty, because poor papa had such a poor memory he hadn't paid his premiums; as if that made any difference. “Oh, don't say a word, Mr, Nags; you never agree with ma on anything!"* The ‘‘Fudge’"’ Idiotorial Who Shall Own Murphy? (Copyrot, 1905, Planet Pub. Co.) the things their politicians gawe It will probably COST THEM MONEY! Here in New York the greatest Public Utility seems to bo Charles F, Murphy. You cannot lose him, ' Somebody ought to. THINK can get Charlle before he GETS community could OWN Murphy I We.do not know curselves <@ Of [ The election results in Ghi- cago POINT THE WAY for New York, Chicago has voted for the municipal ownership of public utilities, The Chicagoese are. going to try and GET BACK away when nobody was looking! There Is NOTHING DOING without Charlie, UP some scheme whereby wo US, This fs important. If the It would own everything olse! | this can be. brought