The evening world. Newspaper, February 9, 1905, Page 12

by the Press Publishing Company, No, 53 to 63 Park Row, New York. tered at the Post-Ofice wt New York as Hecond-Class Mall Matter. av eices srssveseveesssNOy 16,878, LED al aliaed al THE ARMY OF UNEMPLOYED. | is estimated that 100,000 men in this city are without regular em- When the snow-shovelling stops the army of unemployed ing—and: crime] . In’ sending to the country hundreds of the unemployed the Bowery sion is moving in the right direction, For the past ten years the| r labor supplies of the farms have been drawn to the cities. As ult the volume of farm produce has been almost stationary, and the atly increased prices have reduced the value of wages in the cities and culture more profitable, The men who have come from rural communities and small villages Very ones who should be encouraged to return whence they came, | ly for their own good, but that through their labor the present e prices of food products may be restored to a more normal level, | ‘Meanwhile, let not Charity withhold her hand, nor Mercy forget me who are hungry, cold and perhaps desperate, EXPERT ADVICE ON MARRIAGE. Dorothy Russell, the fair daughter of the perennially beautiful Lil- is well equipped to give valuable advice to girls “about to marry"— ¢ is anything in heredity and if wisdom can be drawn from an un-| experience, Her advice to girls, given in St. Louis after leaving her husband, is) “Don't elope, and don't marry until you're sure In your heart that you love “Don't marry young. 1 believe a girl is young until she is twenty-five, She Ould not marry wnii! she’s had a chance to learn something of human nature. Nit be so eager to marry that you pick up the first man you see. I thought 1 is doing something smart when | eloped. 1 thought 1 could show mamma and ds that 1 could be a real married lady, There's nothing to that system. Tncidentally Mrs. Einstein observes that “it is better for girls to marry jody of their own religion, Religious differences cause arguments, | guments lead to quarrels,” ‘All this seems sensible—particularly the warning against marrying g and eloping, ‘ What gitl of eighteen knows her own mind and) énot to mention human nature as incarnated in that hundred-sided | man? é{ us hope that Dorothy's conclusion Is not so true: “But it’s no advise girls, Everybody advised me and I took my own advice,’’| ortant matters a young girl is her own worst adviser. NO MORE STILT ROADS, West street grab, having for its object an elevated road along River front from the Battery to Fifty-ninth street, which The has several times helped to defeat, bobbed up again before the Fund Commission yesterday, the Subway means “no more It was promptly put to sleep by street grabbers one and all may as well understand)that the suc- straddle-bug roads in New York.” om the unsightliness of the elevated structures and their injury to and to the streets, the miserable service on the Third avenue line | additional aggravation to the people. HE DELICATE HUMAN MACHINERY, bly a fraction of the study and care, In every machine shop, june and factory the boilers, engines, shafts, pulleys and machin- Arequent inspection and receive oonstant attention. Everybody without this they would fail to’run and that carelessness is and costly, all these analogies from man-made machines and with the ‘warnings from others’ experience, men and women continue to plainest rules of diet and hygiene, and they will probably con- do so as long as every human being in some mysterious, uncon- y regards himself as an exception to the general laws of nature, to avoid disease is to KEEP IN CONDITION. But to do this thought, care and moral courage. WHEN SPEECH IS GOLDEN, Y, W. C. A. proclaims its opposition to the use of expletives Real profanity is of course opposed, and such exclamations heaven!” “Fudge!” and “O Lord!” are also on the black list, le might be well extended to many forms of feminine slang. Mt is bad enough tor men to use language which they should not, ww can they be expected to purify their English when so many etive young women manirest a carelessness of speech which, though ted, iS reprehensible? cpletives weaken the force of statements and detract from the $s of description, Slang vulgarizes speech. One's mother tongue ble tool which should be kept bright and clean, ¢ Czar’s Government has blackli:ted the workmen who led the sy in. play at. psirikes, The autocrats ought to have learned that this is a game} Committee of Nine will labor in vain if it does not learn that olice cannot be reformed so long as “the system” remains, Roosevelt was elected, after $$ settles it, all! The high joint convention of Said on the Side. ETAIL trade nobe—February sace Tifice offerings show a neh Ine of Wurglars’ sundries, ranging in R —|vanlety from a $20,000 consignment ot ipaintings to w $10,000 Government bond land a wealth of rare bric-a-brac, The exhibition of the latter at Capt, Burns's police station for IWentification called out a “carriage trade’ of large propor tions, The Improvement of artiste | tas ervable Jn the burglars’ selec- tlons was the subject of’ general com. | ment. . Subway motormen still insisting on |"fitteen minutes beiween ipa.’ Any- “thing off for the little watts at Worth street? . . Brooklyn Young Men's League ures) shoppers to solve the rush hour Bronte by going home early, Observe that It Ld a “young” men’s league. eee Massachusetts mother who was a twin has given birth to triplets, Remains to be sean whether the arithmetical pro- Rression will continue to the next gen- eration, eae “So you really like work, do your" asked the farmer's wife, “Oh, yes, mum, yes,’ replied the tramp, “You sce, mum, beer ain't no good without they's plenty of work in it."—Philadelphia Press, ele Religious revival is now to be tried to stop the crime wave, Revival of Byrnes methods might help, Maith with| works {3 always more effective, see Condolences for Oklahoma, which be- comes a State with prohibition fastened on it for twenty-one years. A State on the water wagon’ by act of Congress Is a sight which the Fathers of the Re- publio were lucky in not living to see, . * . It te to be heped that Albany legisia- tors ure mindful of the fact that many dime novels now sell for a dollar, see “Lecturer on the Art of Right Think- Ing’! says she knows a lawyer whose tonguo acaiired a coat one-quarter of an inch thick because of ‘emotional poisoning” caused by anger. Have heard it called poison’ before, eee “Teach me the true poetic touch,” gushed the beautiful girl eho wished to pen metre. “AIL right,” chuckled the dard with the fringed trousers, “Loan me $10.""—OMcago News. o * @ Ella Hopkins, a girl born deaf, dumb and bind, is sald to have attained great @kitl with the typewriter, An interest- ing exhibition of the facility of the blind with the typewnter was recently made at the Royal Normal College for the Blind in England, where a class of 160 pupils took shorthami dictation at speed of eighty words a minute, and then transcribed thelr notes on @ type- writer, eee ° “Crime,” according to a British au- thority, Dr. Saleeby, “is a reversion of & reappearance of a state of things once normal,” That is, it's Deveryism in MoAdoo days which 1s the cause of all the trouble, ° horse's push counts for more than his pull, Different with the threr, oe @ Among the “notable deaths of 1905" almanac editors should not fall to chron- fole thone of “the original cake-walk man" and the ploneer maker of chew- Ing-gum, which occurred thie week, o ee @ “Nowhere in the world fe woman #0 badly ‘treated as tn this free Republic, said Mine Theresa Barkalow before th not new; Bociety for Political Study, O woman! Indeed, one would have thought it ex- In our hours of ease, Uncertain, coy, and hard to please! eo 8 6 Long—I suppose the girl you are engaged to has a lot of common sense, Short—Yea; and, that's more, she has a lot of uncomhon dollars, F oe 6 "@eaft” in the Park Department may be sald by the punater to be in its con- genial home, . : . Gas at three cents @ thousand feet in some Kansas cities, and in others “oheaper to bum it than bo turn it off,” Monopoly must. be in a rudinentary otate in Kansas, * ee There are times when the prophet really prophesies, Witness this from “Old Moore's Almismach’’ last June; "A yelling, syrging, savage crowd, fur- coated ang thickly clad, desperate through taxqtion, government and the horrors of war—try to olear the throne of a weak«minded, badly advised wwtoorat, yullets fly, blood flows, and people fli—but not yet. Later will they—like their ailies—honor a Presi- dent of thetr own choice, but education must march on first and set the work: ers thinking,” Merry-@o-roun erles, shooting shows of o1 land represent 000 and employ traveling menag- leries and other side- sland quails in Eng- Investment of $7,500,- persons, . It takes a ton of flour and twenty gal-| lons of water to make the 1,00 gallons | of paste required every week to stick up Kansas City's theatre posters, Subway posters appear to need a paste which more resembles “dough,” “Do you think Betum will ever fhe People’s Corner. jetters from Evening World Readers Concert Nulaances, Editor of The Mvening World: m wonder why it is that when oes to a concert he generally sees egotiat jabbing a tuning-fork in- ear; another straining his neck poly #haking his head when he imaginary mistake, while still a at you as if you were an i hen you follow the performance ith | goore, Buch acts as these are fh | oil and really disgusting to the who goes to a concert for ute and benefit derived from ev, let it be sald that in the of cases these paople know cept the rudiments, Perhaps some kind tion, DANIEL Solved It Hoeing Polatenh A To the Editor of The Evenin, Vorid I solved the cigar Drouin aris hoe tng potatoes, ‘The problem says: It vou should get $100 to buy 100 clears (some of them to cost $10 each, some $1 each and some 9 cents each) how many ol- gare of each kind could you go? 1 fg. ured it out by potatoes and And that 1 could get 4 cigars at $10 each, 24 cigars at $1 each and 72 cigars at 60 cents each, making 100 ctgars for $1, How's that for a. Rube? PAST QUOGUE FARMER, reader will offer an explana wipe out his debts?” “No; he's too much of a sponge.” —Philadelphia Press, During the last session of Parliament Prime Minister Balfour talked 917 col-| umns of fine type. As records go thial probably surpasses all previous achleve- ments of the human larynx, ee New sidewalk law Jn effect Tuesday provides that when ice or enow Js left on the walk “within four hours of day: Nght" after the storm closes, th | jing householder is Hable to'a ne sa jor five days in the worhhouse, Add Washington date Imo for location of this| law. ee The world's oldest thief, aged 104, and ,fald to be an Oxford graduate, has {come to grief behind prison bars in | England, He might \ ‘in New ne have had better Mary Jan FAIS OLD DOOR wo NT, OPEN: Mg WHY DONT YOU TAKE THE LOCK Pacey awe a) SAr! THERE S SOME BURGLARS UP THE ) STREET, WE WERE ONLY FOOLIN)- PLEASE College professor announces that af} F or Love or Laziness? By Nixola Greeley-Smith. a \ do 80} en marry for laziness she merely ex- m an y| presses in a modern wey the old idea Women| that they marry for a home, Suppose Is {tt for! they do, ‘There is more work Involved No, for lagi-|!n maintaining a home than In almost any other way of making a living Known to woman at ‘the present day. | So, If they marry to be lazy, they fall uiterly to pealize their ambition, Any girl who, after earning her Iiv- woman the other ing a a stenogragher or bookkeeper, ‘ay .; married any save a very rich man iii ek yeaa with the idea that It would be a “rest Brom her. ey" would Jn less than (three months ihe iden she: ade flad herself sighing for the comparative P sened ir | leisure of the office she had quitted— tbat ib ot course, if she made any at- Ieeaen a ve up to the obligations she The only way the woman who mar- This was the dlo- cum of Mrs, Eliza beth B. Grannis, felivered toa young ploded. For it has come to be a pretty well recognized fact that marriage for] sos 'to be | tbe lazy < any other motive than love ts for a|pose is by iiviig iit Gein ee woman of average sentiment and sus-| "nd then the crime carries the “punish- ceptibllity a most arduous undertak-| 2 along with it more ‘than ever, Ing. neg It ts difficult enough ordinarily to un-| Gentle Remindera, derstand the optimism of people who} on'n marry for Jove, Those who marry for | "Dy Peo SO ee NUBIA RORY any other reason are incomprehensible, | ; care wear a trailing skirt to Any man or ‘woman who marries for | t it aa 1 money,earns it, no matter how much it aeeen until 2PM, to start out may be, And the woman wedded to a| 1PM take a list of artiol man she doesn't love for a support will save it nome tn your dee een often wish she were washing dishes In| “hy. AURA te ete @ restaurant, Of course, she may soMe-| W106” hoes, stren i an as som Pane times wish that, anyway, no matter) 5.0. : RENE RDS raistyem, coal whom she is married to, Don't swing your purse recklessly, Mhe few women who marry million-| Others may care for It if you don't. alres may achleve the gratification of| Don't let your generous inclinations the Jainess which Mry, Grannis claims | do violence to your financial limitations, Uungee 0 many of ithe sex to matrimony. | Don't drag the little childron around But the great majoriiy who become the | with you on the wearisome purchasing wives of men {n moderate olroumstamces | tour. certainly never achieve what they | Don't forget to unbutton your coat marry for, if ease be their ideal, Jand release your neck fur when you Peet tear seat at It papieea ene ae big stores intending to stay y rhetth h jures | some time, ne into mateimony be rose color or| Don't get cross at the store attend. Rol, since it leaves the same dull gray |ants if they seem slightly languld, for | drearinesa when It wanes, But we ail | they have troubles as well as you, — | have naturally a partiality for rosa! Don't forget to take along a bag In color, and want at least a little streak | which to put the small parcels, then of It in our lives, |you will not be minus several at the| When Mrs, Grannis says many wom- close of the day,-—Chicago News. Cur-Tailed Utility. HA BE Nonlin vegies Orcs | My Indy has a fuzzy dor, And much does sho adore tt, The kitchon maid tho't it a mop; Now, would you blame her for it? A Domestic Row. | “They had a hot time in the kitchen last night; one of the toothpicks struck & match,” “And then the match lost his head, en?" oe Natural Query. FOR SALE~ WOODEN’ ARMS) AND — LEGS i- ( cs) wre on W, SIATREAS. Little Johnny—I wonder if dis is der place where me muddor buys her wood? Little Willie’s Guide to New York. .—THE SUNDAY PARADE sum sentchorles aggo #o runs the ied | pend tly fokes used to parraid fith avnoo after chered on Sundy noon and as soon as the rest of us freeboarn nu No. XI yoarkers herd of tt we chalsed down irom harlam end seckend aynoo and greaniteh vilij on sundy noon with aul yaths t ar fit to ware and we) rided 1th avnoo trying to look Ike | sogslety queens and Jax, and evryboddy thaut evryhoddy was one of the 4 hunderd and we felt It was Indead good | to be thare, Meentime the reel sosslety | crowd had forgot thare was evyer suten a plaice as fith avaoo and moast of them had eaven fongott that ehereh jockurs on sundy go thay stopt parraid- {ne Wih aynoo alter ehereh but the 4ynoo is el crowded on sundy by super: | eilllus throngs hoo wood malk a wild | rush for the subway or ell rodes If 1 wuz to holler Last ‘rane ‘Too- Harlim Is Just Going, We nu grand peeple nun of us ” yet we weap with luy vs id in summer tt te ae hot as ares else and our strvats ar diivty @nd ou: pollyticks ar rottin and our hoame set. robd but we Juy tho horrid Jold sitty so mutch we talk it as an Inne ault if Giovy boddy caven menshuns that gum Uthher platce has good poynts too. we wauk on fith avnog sundaso ‘In hoanes of beelng mistook for memmbery Higher Up. By Martin Green. ‘“ 6H,” sald the Cigar Store Man, “that Jerome {s going to launch a John Doe inquiry to discover the names of the State officere who travel on New York Central passes,” “If he summons them all,” assert- ed the Man Higher Up, ‘he'll have to hire Madison Square Garden to hold them, It he sends them all to Jail he'll have to build an addition to the Island, If there are any pro» fessional politicians who pay fare on the New York Central I'll bet there 1s a gallery somewhere in the Gran@ Central Station where the money is framed, i “A certain train leaving Albany for thi» city every Friday afternoon is known to the employees as the paper train. The conductor passing through has 60 many passes fisshed at him that he feels as though he wore gasing at @ panorama of New York Central official signatures, The right kind of a politician who doesn't carry a pocketful of New York Oen- tral passes for his friends is looked upon es a shine, “Ot course our Senators end Ae- semblymen collect mileage every time they make the tour from thein homes to Albany and back again But all they get is $1,500 a year, ‘They ‘have to pay their own expenses: in Albany and Albany is no quick- lunch town. The sound of the rou. lette bali jumping in the wheel ts never stilled in the hours of dark- ness, while the click of poker chips 1s next door to a continuous per- formance, Drinks and food oost just as much there as they do in New York or Buffalo and a whole lot more . than they cost in the small towns on the State, “The custom of legisla and State officials riding on passes js not confined to New York State. It ie looked upon as one of the perquisites | of office, When Theodore Roosevelt was Governor he didn't hesitate to travel on tho courtesy of the rall- roads and he hasn’t hesitated to do it since he has been Vice-President and President. But the fact is not preventing him from handing out hot wallops to the railroads just the same,” ‘It's a wonder the railroads don’t refuse to give passes to public of- ficials,” mused the Cigar Store Mhn, “No," corrected the Man Higher Up. “It’s a wonder the railroads |don’t quit offering them.” Mrs. Nagg and Mr. ...eBy Roy L. McCardell.... 6 HERE'S a) after I was married I had to stop my ai s pectal| Music lessons, although Susan Terwile sale of| iger's sister used to take vocal lessons phonograph to- 4nd paid as high as $5 @ lesson, and day, Mr, Nagg, and| #h¢ used to change her teacher every while I never ask| Week and now her voice is ruined, so for anything, and| her last teacher rays, unless she takea am perfectly con-| 4 Course from him and pays $7 @ lesson, tented with what 1/ _ ‘‘I might have been a great singers have, al though|! might have teen a great artist, be= goodness knows 1| °U8e I used to copy outline pletures have noshing in| With @ pyro-pen, and made the lovelieat this world, and you pues woodwork, and I never had @ know {t, for T have} lesson in my life, Roy L. MoCardell (614 ‘you often| ‘But I gave up an artistic career to enough, stil! I think wo ougit to have| Settle down as your wife and house- a phonograph, Mr. Ladyfinger has a) "old drudge, It made the tears come lovely one, and he alts for hours listen: | Pine eee ie Ita i ue Simpson Ing to it playing ‘Violets,’ or the 'Wed-| teading her paper on ‘How Home Lite ding of the Lily and the Rose,’ for he's] Nother mesting esterday. Me ohare just wild about flowers, You have a gon, I see by the papers, has kidnapped talking machine already, you say? | the three little Jimpson children an “Where is it? You must have it at) says they were neglected, but that Is untrue, for Mra, Jimpson dresses beau. the office, T have never seen it! | Urully and she has the sweetest volce “I think jf we had a phonograph It pe Aiea alle ret Rody, ‘My Dear a eae ut that's the way husbands act these might keep Brother Willle at home.’ gave How do 1 know what you say because you know how fond he {8 of abuut me to your cronies? You ara going to the theatre, Last night he sweet enough to my face, but one can't went to s The Lady Sports’ at some truist-men these days, tind now when ask you for a pho : theatre, named after one of our naval | PISHORTEDN Yau) Ont heroes, so It must be first class; yes, grin at me." 1 I remember now—Tho Dewey. I have , naver been there, Out It must be a nice} MUO ® Ine and Yuta, place, because all the shows are ‘Beauty Shows' and such like, because I find the play bits In his pockets, It) Isn't Hke those horrid stags vou and r club friends Po to see, The plays) Brother Willie goes to see haye the sortening influences of refined lady per- | formers, Ah, you may sneer, but al-| though T do not object to Brother Wil- lle's going lo see refined lady perform- ers, or belonging to The Jolly Pall- bearers, or attending (he select hops of FIXING THE Door! | The Gentlemen's Sons of Red Hook, yet I think he would stay at home more t if we had a phonograph, Why, his cad friend Robble the ‘Toad Imitates a| "Did you see Jiggs go flying by phoncgraph, ‘giving the “Ravings of! sew auto yesterday?” John McCullough” Just lovely, You} ‘No, but T saw him go flying out of never cared for music, and of course|it—when {t turned a somensault,"* In his The ‘‘Fudge” Idiotorial _ “Never act on first impulses,” Be Sure You Are sald Talleyrand, “for hey are Wrong Before ff ALWAYS RIGHT.” Going Ahead. This Is sound advic’, but oftsn lost sight of, WE always act on the OTHER principle, WE never go ahead untll we are SURE we are (Copyrot, 1905, Planet Pub, Co.) WRONG, Many persons WASTE THEIR TIME fn trying to be RIGHT, If they were CONTENT TO BE WRONG It would SIMPLIFY matters, We CANNOT ALL be right, but the majority of us CAN READILY BE WRONG, WE prefer to be with the MAJORITY, How often do we hear of a good man “gone wrong” and how rarely of a BAD MAN “GONE RIGHT,” NOI It fs best to stick to THE SIMPLE LIFE, to be OFTEN WRONG than RARELY RIGHT, It ls MUCH easier to SAY you know something than to take the trouble to FIND OUT, The other fellow MAY NOT KNOW THE DIFFERENCE] It Is better of a loezure clas that we klame to dee- apize good oald nu yoark! P, THRHUND, TALK LOUD! IT MAKES A BIG IMPRESSION]!