The evening world. Newspaper, January 13, 1905, Page 14

ie by the Press Publishing Company, No, 63 to 63 Park Row, New York, _ Entered at tho Post-Oftice at New York as Second-Class Mall Matter. NNR let AM EE ILS A TES UME 4B. ose. seeseseceeeseee he Man H ++». By Martin Green.... anagers Profite ith Which to Hire Artiste for Critics to BHE,” said the Cigar Store Man, “that the musical critics Jumped on the latest boy wonder with a fiddle and d his musical sJats in.” hard to satisfy the musical responded the Man Higher “The dramatic critics are handy the pan, but compared with the tal critica they aro understudies sheep. If there are any New ‘ousical critics in heaven, it te shot that they are handing Wallops to the orchestra. oomes this little Heiny kid ‘the ooean and performs on a ‘& way that {s at Jeast not of- . But the musical critics side- im becauke he 1s shy on. nu- ithe opinion of the critics hig stunt 'ke a motor, } guide sheet tells him to he drags like a Third the Bachelor Girl. By Nixola Greeley-Smith. ‘ T* B young women of Connorsville , ind., have organ- ‘zed a club for the Hi ‘mutual protection of the membors against the blend- ‘shments of young nen,” The organization took place last jweek, and no re- port haa yet im reached the Kast of its sudden dis- ‘But its end |is in sight. For, 40 one.of the bylaws, no ntem: af ah the nape jet and been approve “yh bers, Is there @ ld meet th nants #0 many other n amd still be proaiane. to dy of bis heart? There is not. tan infinite possibility for n- ‘the situation opens, Suppose for 66 that Jane and Flora, both ‘of the club, should happen to ‘with the same man and that finally cgpture him and sub. me for approval to her sister It is not concelvable that have such a realizing sense d office as to prevent her ‘4 deadly Uttle black ahd blighting the lives of two ‘That 1s, supposing that under any olroumstances fiat of the club unless it ‘her own decision and was ah a, a erlbed it he thinks he can still for flve minutes with- it moving his feet, blindfolded, ‘aby, but if the blindfolding thoroughly \t is fairly safe to ll move his feet before ire half up, If he does Will probably topple forward ld trick for one person to put vd hjs forefingers together, elbows on a level with the and then challenge any other 6 #eparate them by a falr pull. hae #, Hercules to accom- a iustration of a siml- ‘the following: Get a lady to right hand on tho top of her then ‘endeavor to remoye it of yours, Unless your strength hove the Average and hers jow you will fail entirely. oi amoke a cigar rieht through Consecutive puffs without once it out of your mouth? Probably ge cikar smoker wou!d smile WEN ean NO, 18,881 igher Up. ¥ avenue ‘L’ express, and when he gets his cue to play fast he slurs his notes, “Acconiing ¢o the critics this twelve-year-old kid has no sentiment, They seem to think that unless a three or four times, has etood trial for murder, has beon operated on for appendicitis and carried the banner he can’t put any feeling into music. “Notwithstanding the critics, the audience gave the youthful wizard of the fiddle three cheers, Whenever he paused for a minute to let the orchestra take @ hurdlo he got a hand. Passing out of the house the people who nad heard the kid play agreed that he was the goods, “Ot course, they don’t know what nuance is; they haven’t got @ line on expression or sympathy, All an au- dience 1s good for ie to buy tickets and give managers profits out of which they hire musicians for mu- sical critics to roast,” “What do you know about music?” asked the Olgar Store Man, “Nothing,” answered the Man Higher Up. “I couldn't draw pay for performing with a bass drum in a Balvation Army band. I am in the audience class.” followed up by unlimited wedding pres- ents, The club will, of course, dwell to- gether in peace and harmony until this inevitable contingency arises and the purpose for which it was organized rends it asunder, No two women ever agree as to the eligibility of one man, unless, to be sure, they are both in love with him or are Interested In the mere matter of his income, We are never more than fairly well regigned to any other marriages than ‘our own, unless we consider them from man has been married and divorced , Home. Mauheiwes On a purely mercenary standpolnt, But the secondary purpose of this noyel «ub, that of “mutual protection against the blandishments of young men," {s doserving of encouragement and imitatlon—for surely the charm of the young man grows with every year, and who, since gaudy neoktles and colored socks were added to his .| blandishmenta, can resist him, unless fortified by a phalanx of disapproving aisters behind her? Furopean hotel servants are supposed ‘to have a secret system of marking baggage by ‘which’ the patron's gener- osity in the matter of tipa te Indicated, If the seriousness of a young man's in- tentions or his attitude on the question of dinners, flowers and theatre tickets could be communicated from one young woman to another by, some similar seoret code it would be [a long step in the right direction, Clubs for this pur- pose might wall be organised, and young women everywhere would be ohly tou happy to join them. at the Idea of there being any difficulty in the task, says Stray Stories. Atany rate you are pretty safe in wagering any one, however hardened a smoker, that he cannot perform this apparently pimple feat, It has often been tried, but unsuccessfully, Tuck your hand under your arm palm outward, and then attempt to place the with long, flexible hands, may succeed, but the average person will certainly fail, Here is a good trick to try on a strong man !f you have one among your acquaintances, / Make hjm stretch his arm out straight, hand palm downward, and then, laying &n ordinary wooden match across the roots of the first and third fingers, sug- gest that he shall break it by the pres sure of the second finger, Remember, the Important polnt about this trick Is that the arm bo absolutely straight. The slightest curvature givea a great In cnease In muscular power to the fingers. flowers can be forced by heat, uch as is usually supplied to glass houses, 1s cf course an old but that the direct actiun heat can have any effect In has- Ng the blooming of plants is a fresh tion, but one that In these days i flowers are demanded In season, jon, at all times, and of every | kind and country, !s worth considera- tion, ber at Chausee-sur-Marne, France, which, while If destroyed the greater part of a populous village, ruining many of its Inhabitants, may yet have as a jresult the even greater development of an Industry that gives employment to Journal, Some of the boughs escaped all hurt, and it was with these that the ver curious phenomenon was observed whic |merits attention, | A second flowering commenced at once, and by the end of October all the trees farthest from the scene of the fire were in full bloom, as though called to renewed life by the fresh voice of May, instead of hushing ‘to slumber with the | | Whioh plants are submitced, lullaby of October, At another point the flames had swept close to a large Ilac tree, and this, aa | wall as some plum trees, bewildered by | what niust have seemed to It a sud | return of summer, put on once more jt bridal robes It must be mentioned that the ire only| lasted four hours, It will be ‘noticed, therefore, that there was no reaem- | blance between this sudden blast of heat and the ordinary gradual foreln ‘The Pants affected by the exper.ence were those whose buds were already torned for the following season, which’ is a disuinet hia’ that the blossoms uppeared out of time and as the dion on of thumb {n the palm, An artist or planist, | 3 A serious fire broke out last Septem- |" thousands of people, says Chambers's Best Jokes. NEVER HAD A CHANCE, "What ja'the greatest speech that | Congress ever developed?” "The greatest speech,” @ald the atesman with the disappointed look, “wag never dellyered, I wrote {t my- self."—Washington Star, A PROFESSIONAL ONE, Fuddy-I saw Dr, Guesswell this ly—H’m? What did he have to Fuddy—Nothing particular, He sald | ho was glad to see me well, Duddy—Only think a2 ft! Anentas | was struck dead for a Ilttler one than that,—Boston ‘Transcript, WOULD SEEM 80, " sald the pretty country tri, | 0 see me during the mes on Sunday,” | Kled the friend, thing of @ Sunday | —Chicago Nawa, LOST UPON HER, Mr. Gadabout—My husband ts 60 allp- )|shod. His buttons are forever coming off, Mr. Bhs ~, ole. tue Brae, aupplement Grimm—Perhaps they are not! + properly, ‘about—That's just tt. He 4 with his acwing. London’ DISTRICT-ATTORNEY is the public prosecute criminals, without regard criminal who picks a single pocket is not half the thief the fraudulent promoter or stock ‘‘washer’’ who steals from hundreds is. The ‘washers’ and their kind seldom He rarely escapes the law. see a court-house, The ordinary murderer does not often kill more than one man, The. law disposes of him usually, if the police The men responsible for the Slocum disaster slaugh- They may be brought to trial-.. at the most two, catch him. tered families by wholesale. some time. Women who conspire to get a rich man drunk and take his money away from him should of course be punished and the rich drunkard should be sobered up and restored to his family, al- though it is not essential that the District-Attorney should put ice on his head. The rich men who conspire to keep meat and coal out of the reach of the people of New York are only doing in a smaller way-what the two women were attempting to do to one man when Mr, Jerome interrupted them, It is laudable to punish small criminals and to fill the prisons with them if they are guilty. It is not so good to talk about doing things as it is to do them. So many people are wicked that it is impossible to punish them all, but the conviction of one big sinner would do more good than the jailing of a multitude of retail rascals. Why not try it, Mr. Jerome? leleleieleineieioleloleloieioieiniotols Woman’s First Thought Is Man ¥ ¥ # # ¥ # And When He Does His Best He Usually Gets the Worst of It ret TAH TINE HAY huh mane LPR EERE RSDP bP oP RPP PRP PrP bbb bbb bbitbpbbhlibbeieitt Ininloleleinieloloiofotetolelelolelolols; SESESEESSSSSESSESSSSSNET Brains Not Essential. MRS, HENPECK—Here's a story about a woman who lived a whole week without any brains, MR. HENPHUK—Humph! that's nofhing! than that. You've Iived much longer they aro not colors, what are they? | member of the 8, P, | ‘To the Waiter of The Lvening World: ‘Fridey Evening c’s Service The Evening World Will Print Here Every Day an Editorial on Some Important Popular Need a Why Not Convict a Big Sinner official who is paid to to their quality, The Powers of Citi es Little Power in Ours. more limited than are those of London, Paris and other foreign cities; just as the powers of these ere far more lmited than were those of the ancient ‘fovercign Cities," such as mediaeval Venice, The accompanying lb powers of American cities are diagtam shows A as the unlimited power of the old sovereign cities, where the municipality governed |tself with no out. side interference, B is the modern for- capitals of empires to which the polite © cal development of those empires had added glory, importance and power, OF they were themsclyes sovereign Stated Of tho litter dort were Vehice and the cities of the Hanseatic League: They could mould the!r institutions to mult thetr own fancy and In accordance with their own experience, 'The great foreign clttes of. today have ‘thelr power directly from ¢helt i | | DH iF | A. The eovereign city (Hanseatic, Vi eign olty whose power is limited only Letters. They Are Not Colors, To the Editor of The Evening World: A says that black and white are ool- ors, B rays they are not colors, If ANXIOUS, Black and white are not colors, Black 1s the absence of color, White is a blend of all colors, None Universally Observed, To tho Editor of The Evening World: Are thero any legal holidays in this country? L, B. The Confederates, ‘To tho Editor of The Byening World: Which side won the battles of Bull Run during the ely war? ALR. At 20th Street and Madison Avenue, To the ¥ of The Evening World: Whom can [ apply to to become a Cc, AM? L, oO Sunday, ‘To the Editor of The Evening Worlds On what day of the week did Aug, 30, 1885, occur? GW. B London, Which has the largest population, Peking o¢ London? WUGENE C, NEWCOMB, London (census of 1901), 4,590,451; Po idng's estimated population ta 3,000,000, by the will of the national government/ C 1s the American city, where municipal power Is limited both by national and state government, It may be well to take counsel trom foreign authorities on municipal affairs and to learn from the experience of forelgn ctties; yet the condition of the American city 1s # unique and its eur- roundings are #0 different from thoes of foreign cities that nothing save Amer- leah examples and American conditions will fit the eltuation, says Alfred J, Roewade, in the Chicago News, Tue famous cities of history were either Home Education. Electrical Phenomena, 4 4 ry3 ABY was playing a B a-cake this mornin professor's wife, “and after A little while, baby leaned over ami started to take hold of Teddy''— “Of vhom 1’ asked the professor. ‘The mew Initten,"’ said the professor's wite. "Oh, yes, Yeo, We have another ad- dition to the family, then?’ gald the professor, “Well,” aia the professor's wife, “Bridget found {t on the step yesterday morning, and {t was ao pretty I thought we might keep it. But let me tell you, Just as soon as baby stretched out his hand, Teddy jumped, even before he was touched, and his fur stood up, and he gave a little miow and he ran/away, Now, wasn't that queer?” “No.” said the professor, gazing at the ceiling. "It wasn't? said the professor's wife, “T think {t was, Baby has nover en- noyed Teddy and couldn't have hurt him because he scarcely tovohed him, It was unnatural.” “Not at all unnatural,” sald the pro- fessor, “If baby had been playing pat- a-cake,"’ “What has that to do with It?” asked the professor's wife, “Everything,” eald the professor, “Baby charged the cat.” “Baby did what?" asked the profes- sor's wife, “What on earth do you mean?” "I say, baby charged the oat,” ssid the professor, "It was this way: You see, after the infant had been playing pat-a-cake for some minutes, his little hands became frictionally electrified, and as soon as they came neaf the cat the electricity passed through the hairs of the fur and into its body, giving it a slight shock, Catskin {s @ great con- ductor of electricity, It was probably | Wife the first sensation of the kind the ani- mal had ever expotienced and doubt- lessly caused it considerable surprise.” “Dear me.’ said the professor’ fo, “how interesting, Tell me all about electricity, Charles, do,” “Does Bridget still continue to be rat- Isfactory as a cook and nurse and an exponont, generally, of housework?" asked the professor after a 1oment's pause, “What—Bridget? Yes, Bridget 19 si Fun in the Home, ON’T be afraid of @ little fun at home, Don't shut. your house lest the sun should fade your carpets, an@ your hearts lest a hearty laugh shake down aome of the musty old cobwebs there, If you want to ruin your sone, let them think that all mirth and ~oial enjoyment must be left on the thresh- old without ‘when they come home at night. Young people must have fun ‘and relaxation somewhere, If they do not find {t at thelr own hearthstones {t will be sought at other leas profitable places, Therefore let the fire burn brightly at night and make tho homestead d ~ht- ful with all those little ants that par- ents so perfectly understand, Don't re- press the buoyant spirits of your ohil- dren; half an hour's merrtment around the fircelde of home blots out the re- membrance of many a care and annoy- ance during the day, and the best safe- guar they can take with them Into the {il i power !s limited by the national government, limited by both the national and State governments, , ih Diagram Showing Comparative Power of City Governments, ‘enice, &c.), B, Modern forelgn city, tte C, American city, its powers national governments without any Other links in the chain, American cities have to reckon with: the governments of the States in which they are situated. It is this condition which malnly checks the aspirations of the great communities, Upon this) rock many desired reforms meet with shipwreck, The American city ts more Umited in power than is any other clive ilized community, The cure for this almost unchangeable condition must be found In the same place that New York found {ts present greatness; namely, {@ the charter movement which was cay rled out so successfully on the basis of the “Greater New York'’ Idea, a {sfactory, She's @ good girl,” sald the Professor's wife, "So?" sald tho professor. ‘Well, in case she gets delingusat in her duty and it becomes necessary to get rid of her, T'l! tell you how." “Oh, I know how," sald the professor's wife, Jnolsively, “bul—eleotrtoity, dear.'" "Yes," sald the professor, “you should follow this course, First, obtain « small table, having Its leg or legs of Glass or hard rubber—'* “We haven't auch a table in the house,” sald the professor's wife, "I sald, obtain one," sald the pros fessor; “then, upon this table place Bridget-—" “Oh, of course, 1f you're going to be funny——" sald the professor's wife. “Not in the least,’ said the profes: for, “far be it, Thereon impose Bridget and fill her with electricity,” “How?'” asked the professors wife, suardedly, “There are several ways,” answered the profeseor, “which vary propontion- ately to the willingness of Bridget, You might rub her violently and ins duce frhutfonal electricity into the women, or you might persuade her to grasp a pair of handles connected with an electrival battery, or you might touch her konckles repeatedly with the brass knob of an electrophorus, By the way, . I don't suppose you have an electro Phorus in the kitchen?’ “Not yet," sald the professors wife, “I thought not,” sald the professor, "Well, having accomplished the task of filling Bridget with electricity, you should then walk unooncernedly abous the room, not touching her, and at @? convenient moment, when she isn’t looking, get behind her and ‘suddenly push over the table with @ glass rod—= not with your own hands, mind you,” “Why not?’ asked the professors "You would find out why not, if yot aid,” sald the professor, OKs honed Bridget lands cn the floor she becomes connected with the earth and imme. diately Jo tio chatge of electricity,” ; ee the, procosaer wife, sald the professor, triu ‘she is discharged,” paar “Ch facia, sald the professor's wife, gazing at hilm steadily, “I only hope the baby won't row tip J8. ke ¢ you." Tearful Child—Daddy, Bobble called me @ pig! It's « Me, Isn't It? Careful Fathor—Well, darling, we'll evorid {6 the influence of a bright Uttle domestig sanctum, call {t an exaggeration,—London Sketch, The ‘‘Fudge The Bullfrogs of Burma. (Copyrot, 1905, Planet Pub, Co.) These frogs had probably be for a MILLION YEARS! Think of a bullfrog a million Yet these bullfrogs did not hopped out Into the open—unttl the door, The million years behind the ’* Idiotorial We notice tn the columns of an East Indian contemporary that some quarrymen !n Burma while blasting rock struck a cavity out of which JUMPED a lively bunch of bullfrogs, en Imprisoned In the solid rock years old! really begin to LIVE until they the quarrymen rudcly opened m DID NOT COUNT! During all this time the bullfrogs had NO OPPORTUNITY | Now they can become Frogs’ This alone would be worth —tf there were no more frogs, Legs at 75 cents a portion, a million years in seclusion Opportunity KNOCKS ONCE at every door, One knock In a million years seems a little slow. We try to knock a MILLION TIMES A YEAR| satin ia ain i ad aah A gai a a i hk i. i i a eal il