The evening world. Newspaper, December 10, 1903, Page 14

“# THE .# EVENING .»# WORLD'S # HOME w# MAGAZINE » eve is Ss By We Creator of “Sunny Park Row, New York. Entered at the Post-Office o ‘at New York as Second-Ciass Mall Matter. SUE-- Men (WHERE 16 SALLE BROW! LODGINGS SiR, % Jim.” # SHE ASKS A POLICEMAN.} a «seeeeNO. 15,450. THE UNIVERSAL “ RAKE-OFF.” According to the Merchants’ Association it has cost the city $2,100,000 to pay $8,440,000 for lands bought In| « ‘the Croton watershed. In some cases only 40 per cent. @f the sums contributed by the taxpayers went to the) « “owners of the land. All the rest was absorbed by the Wn Commissioners and lawyers. _ The fre insurance companies have just exposed the| > i} if . by which they have been compelled to give more QZ mr “public adjusters” of claims than they pay to the - . themselves, The Post-Office investigation has shown that for a of a few thousand dollars unfaithful officials involved the Government in needless expenditures millions. “Commissions are paid by dealers to all kinds of peo- who buy from others, from the cook who does the ing’s marketing to the purchasing agent of a great oratio “Constable.” said Sassy Sue “Have you seen Miss Sally Brown? | “Foolish House ?—Don't get so funny, ® The Shipbuilding Trust has been Killed and the Stee! To a stalwart form in blue, She’s took lodgin’s in this town. Your maw orter lick you, sonny!” crippled by “rake-offs” collected by financiers of Sreeeceosssceonssresoosem | Poy Se oe EOL ant oring respectability. These tolls have been 3 5 . en : Bed Go a soto v0 merle that it roducee the ste-| The Girl : The Important Mr, Peewee, the Great Little Man & #i The“ Sunny Jim’’ Girl ot Jesse James to an insignificance that is simply With No S 7 2 # He Discourses Magniloquently on the President's Message—but, Alas! He Hasn't Read It, fier: Tai'tho;.cass-ot! the’ Sten! Trost alone the ! 0 Sense $! ROOSEVELT TAKES THE SAME Now ABOUT THIS BARRING OUT OF THE 3 = paid by the public reaches half the amount is Of Humor Ete nor in PEASE UNDESIRABLE IMMIGRANTS. THOSE ° \A- TI ediaicity imposed’ by Germany upon conquare Y ALL MEANS, LET US RECOGNIZE INSEL ay Hon VRBO. Lace arte ENDORSE. WHY NOT | ASK. Look AT THE CHINESE FOR INSTANCE OVER- FLOODING THIS FAIR COUNTRY. THEY Rates OUR LAUNDRY —- : BUT THAT \S MERE SPBERT OG THEY ARE LLY GETTING A LINE ON OUR DE AND SOME FINE SR CES: THEY WILL SWEEP IN ON US AND rye HIS NEW REPUBLIC. 4 FOR ONE, VIGOROUSLY INTEND UPHOLDING THE PRESIDENTS POLICy. LOOK AT OUR GREAT AND GLORIOUS COUNTRY. WHAT A SHINING EXAMPLE FoR THEM to FOLLOW. Are we 2 nation of ‘‘grafters?” Why fs it that it is By Bard to work up the public to any really tuning} Nixola Greeley-Smith | ¢ | Of indignation against thieves in office? Can it] (Granddaughter of Horace Greeley). $ booause of a general feeling that the prevailing! . i 4, 4 ba Heele girl all the det-| $ out of office are not much better? The Su- ter perhaps for having no sense of| 4 Court of Missour! has just turned loose the obtet| 1. 4 mmer, And she ts dignined—oh, 4 Mi victed by Mr. Folk. A] She ts also very prudent ani never ee cones . gets herself talked about For she of Philadelphia threw on the floor an offer to| never does just for fun any of the bun- F the city $2,500,000 for a street railroad fmanchise|dred and one essentially harmless tigned an ordinance giving the same franchise to nara tempt a livelier girl to star- cronies for nothing. The people did not resent tho] ye, pa ldae eed Ay ete al catioctal’S “of their property, and the ring that committed it wise old person, keeps an eye on ‘her 1 in power. Just the wame, For she knows that a/ sense of humor at the right moment—or ‘Tm order to have real reform there must be real re-| 1. wrong oné, for that matter—has as The leading citizen who pockets ten millions} many eouls to its credit as the most|? ‘watering the stock of a trust cannot turn a withering | successful revivalist, © ‘of indignation upon the policeman who takes $5) The girl with no sense of humor) ¢ strikes you as dull, perhaps, until you! % falling to see the open side door of a saloon. Hevevadina lio online’ thas; ave Gea g Ne THE PAMPERED TEACHER. pags relied ona ehaa There is no distinction to te won by saying that i. vee ask resteqeninas the theatre, 9 i 8! es you mure 4 “@ohool teachers are underpaid. In expressing that opinion play ie='weli, you know—alos?’ “and 2 )) you are merely going with the crowd. But Mr. Robert] aster you nave racked your brain and] Roosevelt has found how to win a place that {s all his| your friends to discover some mik-and- $ pays teachers are overpaid—that $600] Water production that supplies only baby + toad eee he $600 | rood or thought, abe greets your eeleo- MISS MINNY MAUD HANFF. The author, with Miss Dorothy Ficken, of the “Sunny Jim” and other comic series. Also creator of “Sassy Sue,” the new Evening World fun feature. The Man Higher Up. Depew’s Standard of Prosperity. RELATING TO THE PROSECUTION HE TRUSTS AND CORPORATIONS. a" @ year is too much for a girl. tion rather doubtfully, and says that 2 —~ WHICH ONE SEB,” paid the C! Man, “ r i OF S HAS . 77 hi e Cigar Store Man, “that Chauncey nt Six hundred dollars a year is $50 a month. A fairly! gne would really prefer to go to sonfe-| ® BEEN PMEECeRERY Ee Be oe . Depew told John D. Rockefeller’s Sunday-school Seamstress can earn $15 a week, or $65 a month, and mine lise ry iz , THOSE SOULESS MONSTERS ¢ class at the dollar dinner that honesty is an ac- yr launch thrown in, A good plain cook can earn pati baler alba paranpaayles 3 WHY ONLY THE OTHER DAY, | HAD You MUST _ HAVE’ < quired habit.” a month without the need of paying anything for acts, ‘haa oome! (0! be regarded) an e m- TO PAY DOUBLE FARE ON BEEN READING ¢ “Chauncey always was a kidder,” responded the Man d, washing or carfare. At the end of the month she! proper for the young person to hear 2 A STREET CAR, THE THE PAPERS Farertnacuaeaunts Higher Up. “He may have convinced the young men ve considerably mofe to put in the bank than the|upon the stage. 3 CONDUCTOR CLAIMING HE j A) OF LATE N \ DONT who coughed up a bone aplece for a dinner in honor ot 1 teacher cau. When you talk to her you are never | « But then the seamstress and the cook minister to the|quite at your ease. For, even though of the grown-ups. There is nothing dependent| you are ordinarily choice in your) 3 DID'NT SEE ME GET ON. + ‘ IMORSREEWEES) HAVE TIME To the richest young man in America that you can frame up om the teacher, except the minds and the futures of the| speech, you feel that you must in her : 3 Dow WASTE READING|| $|an appetite tor honesty the same as you 4 tite N WITH THE a | We NEWSPAPERS. HAD A ®|for olives or caviar, but he'll have to ioe seep reksl LITTLE TALK wWitH got theirs in a catch-as-catch-can hold with adversity. é “A man can no more acquire the habit of honesty than he can acquire a new liver, but a man born honest >{can acquire dishonesty if he gets touted right. I have ® | heard of crooks reforming, but I never saw a real crook 3 [reformed ¢ Whenever you see a thief who has cut out > |crime you will find that he has done {t because there is more in it for him, so he is dishonest even in his alleged ® | honesty. “Whenever you find a distinguished millionaire pass- 2 |ing out valuable advice to young men you will find that the burden of his advice ts, ‘be honest’ and ‘work hand.’ You will aleo find the millionaire telling the young man that money isn’t everything. For instance, Senator Depew told the Rockefeller dollar diners that ‘a modest competency is success.’ “Supposing the amiable and gifted Senator had stopped when he had a ‘modest competency.’ Supposing he had said to himself that as long as he owned his own home and was assured of chicken on Sunday he would throw his hand into the discard and get cold feet with what he had. He wouldn't have been a millionaire and . presence put an additional brace on + your thoughts and, another bridle on|? RED LIGHTS AND MORALS. your \speem: For she takes offense very easily and It appears that we have ‘been all wrong. The red) teens seatveree ne De of always a vanting to know w! you n Tights that s0 disturbed us during the late campaign | Ti NG that—something aoteraarcle ‘Were not an effect, but a cause of vice. It 's not that|a:ways want to know yourself. > ‘vicious people hang out red lights, but that red lights; The girl with no sense of humor falls) > make viclous people, Prof. Scott, of Northwestern Uni-|!n love readily, For men never seem eo ° ® 3 ‘Yersity, says so. He cites a case in which the employees| ‘nny to her. ¢ > jp WSS > yy SS > 1d when the; ot funny th ‘ef a photographic factory {liuminated with red lights|arpmoue s0 demoralized that a different color had to to| As a swoetheart she is very exacting. | % , when order was promptly restorcd. If the lights easy S008 Bae ecm the jist "| 7 le of love and always wants to the iearoper. wections of cities were shanged, says) roa tove ty in teay. ae. g . wie ‘doubtless there would be a change in the} you do not love her unless you tell ie community.” her so every five minutes, and even that je theory is plausible. The stage has shown us In|'* not convincing Balen secomenraet “ . yy such @ succeasion o: . A and “Dante” that the wicked residents of the} \>.6s as to make you feci as mechant- world are steeped in a red glare. Readers of Mr. | cal as a department store demonstrator, G Wells know that the inhabitants of ruddy Mars| As a wife she Js equally unsuccessful. @ bad lot. The reformed Tenderloin 1s going to try| She \s Jealoua and positively too atupld Pee lamseence it attne under the new tiode oF Hlge| mar hes punt se wie a om | DY Bowwow and Polly Pugdoodle will be a fair test of the truth of the Scott| uptown to think of it. ue 3 ro , Se eee Ree ee eares aa gre Ea ca Ea 2 # Shopping Tour in Which There Were Too Many Big Bundles.$|~ tyattea stateo Sonator to-day. He aldn't take his ball GO ON PILIN’ Just THIS LITTLE out of the game when he got to be independent, and he DONT MIND ME- HAT: BOX, AND isn’t too old to take a flying tackle at a chance to ao She London Telegraph imagines that it nds in the) Some of the Best I FEEL LIKE THATS ALL cumulate more, : Ptes dent's explanations of his Panama policy “an indi- Z FEW AR WHOLE “Why do millionaires always tell young men to work ‘paustification of the British attitude toward the] Jokes of the Day. yg t SHOP LIFTER, y ] '@ |hard and be content with the small end? You can search ” " A ! me. Maybe it’s because they are jealous. Possibly it te because a self-made. millionaire believes that nobody else is as wise as he, and he wants to spare growing youths the pain of failure. “Senator Depew told his audience that out of 80,000,000 people in this country 100,000 are millionaires, and that tt is supreme folly to try to rival great-fortunes. How did these 100,000 millionaires get thelr money? Did they all play honesty North, Bast, South and West? Not on ® | your Christmas expectations. To tell young men that-{t is 2 |foolish to try to get millions and to tell them in the |next breath that they must be strictly honest 1 Ii ® | whatever else can ‘be said for it. The young man 2 | pays good money to absorb that kind of logic wears a sawdust bin under hig nat.” . “Tt was mice of Mr. Rockefeller to give his Sunday~ 1 class a dinner,” suggested the Cigar Store Man, “Sure it wes,” agreed the Man Higher Up; “and it. «+ COLOMBIANS AND BOERS. ily. % om the people of Johannesburg had seceded from the LESE MAJESTY. } and formed an independent republic, which| The two bearded monarchs met and ‘then been recognized and protected by Great Britain, | kissed each other. Ley ae 3 “Well, observed the feline a would have been a parallel to our proceedings at ath bad ead with: performance " I wou! if we had annexed Colombia, marched on Bogota, | from ® safe distance, “I belleve “trodden out every attempt of the Colombians to| "her be @ cat sat anh a Ying in an independent government in any part of| bistofle privilece of looking . country we should have exactly matched the pro-|—Ctcase Tribune. of the British in South Africa, SHORT LIVED. ‘ re Pattence—He wrote a song he though! | , in @ speech at Paris Mr. Bryan] was going to live. walls upon the importance of keeping political cam-| Patrice—And did it? u free from pereonalities. For instance, he would| Paitenco—Ni, the first merren he d with extreme disapproval a French etatesman|heard slug it muniered tt.—Yonkers defeated for the Presidency of the Republic who| Statesman. refer to another statesman, twice elected to the! ' A REMINDER, AEG: OES: “Took at that man with the bigh hat and sack coat." Oversight—The Fraser Mountain Copper|* ‘yas By the way that veminde me Capital $1,000,000 and debts $107,000, has goneinto| that I've got to get some castor oll.” of a receiver, and $7 has been found In the fell, aay, how does that remiad The promoters of this conporation were evi castpr oll?” new hands at the business. With a LUttle more] “Oh just the bad taste of {t."—Phil- im thigh finance they would not have let that|adelphia Press. DIPLOMATIC FINISH. ‘My dear." said the young husband, ye remind me of an elephant’— fou “Brute! exclaimed tho newly made Ln alana Re alge and 8) ode, who was a trifle senaitive on rege . pear es cpa the queation of avoirdupois. ip Sika bedepsibnd of the prominca| “Because an elephact te terribiy ol gidsopdllga rea Seth pi rowed of mice.” calmly concluded the es Erna ae oaI-=- £f \ )| || posneo! \| tr 2 it didn’t cost them a cent.” ‘Habituals. ———————— Joye.—A new Burlington Arcade to boguile hi from the great Pennsylvania sta- $6 $09909OG00 0909900029090 90008 \ 1 afraid le 014) pnancial head of the matrimonial trust.