The evening world. Newspaper, May 15, 1903, Page 14

sh { FRIDAY EVENING, * MAY 16, 1908, Published by the Press Publishing Company, No. 53 to 6 Park Row, New York. Entored at the Post-Omce at New York as Second-Class Mali Mutter. VOLUME 4B......ccceceeseeereeees NO. 15,242. OPEN-CAR DISCOMFORT. Happy the man whose route to the office Includes a| rip in an open car on the Third avenue “L!” He bene- fits by the best transportation afforded New Yorkers, which, if not rapid transit in the full sense of the term, is at least transit moderately fast with an abunaunce of| fresh air, an absence of dust and grime and a general freedom from physical discomfort which lands him down- town in a serene and equable frame of mind. Let us indulge in a deserved appreciation of a railroad cor- poration the other sins of which are not here excused by | this laudatory comment, ly The comfort given Third avenue “L” patrons {s large- ly due to the strict observance of the rule forbidding standing between the seats of the open cars. In many trips the writer has not seen the rule broken and the fidelity with which the guards enforce ft is in marked contrast to the custom obtaining on the Metropolitan's pen surface cars of permitting any number of passen- gers to crowd in between the seats. A journey in an $ open car thus packed is a most disagreeable experience, far more so than in a closed car where the passenger in @ seat is at least assured a certain liberty of movement. In the crowded open car this is denied him. He is cramped as in a vise. No imposition put upon the surface-car.traveller can ‘be accounted worse than to sit in sightless and crowded discomfort behind and {n unpleasantly close contact with ® standing passenger. It was not intended that the geant room in front of the seated passenger should be 60 utilized; the conditions responsible for {t were not fore- ‘YOUNG MAN TOLD ABOUT NEW YORKERS. IMEON FORD, in Boston, the other day, told his audinece that he had been there before. “When I was bere two years ago,'’ he contin- ued, “I got on a trolley car filled with SAY, MY GOOD FELLOw, | HATE To SEE A STRONG ‘a en een ye A PERSON WHO IS BUSILY EMPLOYED “FOR SATAN FINDS Some MISCHIEF STILL, FOR | (DLE HANDS To D KEEP BUSY my BOY, THATS _! Ga THAT) St =~ PE CAN HOLD TY BREATH LONG ENOUGH, Tn O-K.S — y ULTS, » HOW FOGARTY SAVED THE DAY,. “(Human Storm-Centre’’ Evolves Into a: Genius. OGARTY, the office boy of infinitely low stature and Indes, scribably high voice, had blossomed into fresh ah@y Hitherto unimagined realms of unbearabieness as they He had always been a storm-centra, | The E baseball season drew on, 29 . To submit a lady to such an| women. 1 was the only male passen- Now he became n little scourge. He negularly bet five cents: geen by the car-builders. To a 7 ger. That would not have worried a on the New Yorks each day, and hung over the telegraph inet Grdeal is as indecent as it 1s hpecate le. .,| Bostontan, but it worried me. 1 al- peice struments as If to drag out each word of the report beforet What has become of the “Strap-Hangers’ League,”| ways feel timid going about Boston SURGEON only lately a promising protective movement againet * abuses of passengers’ rights? In other cities {t has taken firm root; in Pittsburg {t has waxed strong and member- ship buttons are visible in countless lapels. Is !t waning in the city that gave the idea birth? Can it not advan- tageously follow up this phase of the crowded-car out- wage? THE SOUVENIR HABIT. | Not long ago we had a story from Chicago of an am- ‘pitious caterer who was forced Into bankruptcy by the ‘levy maje upon him by his patrons for “souvenirs.” ‘Fhe solid silver spoons and forks which were his pride las giving tone to his tables disappeared in such numbers ‘that he was ruined. Mr. David Belasco, also, it appears, has had an ex- perience of similar nature, though not with consequences go disastrous, with the theatre-going souvenir hunters. yThey have stripped the ladles’ room at his play-house f articles with which to remember his temple of the a and his star. Silver-backed brushes, combs of 1 shell, Iinen napkins costing $40 a dozen and other pee of value have been carried away as mementoes fof a pleasant evening of “Du Barry” or “The Darling of jthe Gods.” Inasmuch as an attempt wag made to re- without a chaperon. As I squeezed into @ seat my eye was attracted to a sign which read, ‘Half the people on this car are wearing Bunker Hill Pants.’ I be- lieved that statement to be false, but it was the voice of prophecy." eo ee “I've got to make a speech annual dinner of the Pawnbrokers’ As. @oclation to-night,” sald Lawyer ‘Abe’ Levy, day betore yesterday. “It's my rule ‘never to plan in adyance what to say in an after-dinner speech, But there's one sentence that wank get out of my mind concerning toenight's Speech, and I'm in mortal fegr I'll in- advertently use i. It's thie: ‘The In- terest taken by pawnbrokers in their ‘business mist be unusually large, for they are men of ever-increasing prin- cipal.’ If I say that they'll mob m If J don’t say it I'll be in misery be. cause ft'll keep trying for utterance all through my q@peech. After all, the pleasantest thing about a public dinner is a legitimate excuse for staying at home." the eo 8 Charles Steckler may not be the au: thor of this story, Dut he is said to have told it at a recent dinner. A ‘bad man" came to New York with a fot of POOLE ESSSOOGOOOS Pouna THe c™ RAT Gs risnin! tb, SLTEO9OO 005590000009 neseave DUTY ALONG THE SvBWAY THESE WARM DAYS OuGNT TO REDUCE THEM aave BS: ‘ iT AP eA ates! iT TER cass aoe It was ticked out. Ten times an afternoon would a howl} arise, “Gitteloutoherefogarty!” and the d'minutive pes would go whirling through the air, only to be back at his ol@t place before he fairly toushed ground. A nine was organized in the office to play an out-of-towme club on a certain Sunday. Feeling ran high, and men @whel weighed 200 recalled marvellous runs they had made iret years before and clamored to volunteer. The only man the office nine who could claim prosent distinction was Biante a semi-professional pitcher. On him and on Frank Bower man, of the New Yorks (who, being a friend of the Sportingt Editor, agreed to catch), hung the hopes of the office. Fogarty arose to still greater helghts of self-!mportanee, as the day for the game approached. For his was to be that honor of holding the bats, The great day arrived. Several hundred people dotted the! field, but most visibie of all was Fogarty. Utterly invisible, alas! was the great pitcher. At the last moment he had! fallen ill. The Sporting Editor, who was captain-manages, for the team, looked about in despair. His eye fell om, Fogarty, who was pitching weird curves to a fellow offee boy. “Foga: observed the Sporting Editor, after closely watching the midget’s play for a few moments, “do you know: what a forlorn hope 1s? Well, you're it. Come and pitch fom us!"? “Ahgwan-yer-kiddin-me!" trebled Fogarty. When the truth became clear to him he etepped catmig, into the pitcher's box, faced Bowerman, nodded famillarl to that great catcher, ang observed: Y “I'll show youse Joynts what pitchin’ ts to-day.” ‘The score was 16-14, In favor of the office. x > . . . * ° . ° } (place the abstracted articles with others equally good|money, and being unused to Eastern &| And tt was Fogarty who won the day. rs monetary loss bas not. been small, ways, lost his money. He had made >3 Where he had acquired such skill none knew. That hie manage! Mi many baasts of his ability to shoot, and | eighty-elsht-pound a eam ball . Is it an unfair inference that in “souventr collecting” |iequuntances were tured oot tne CARNES $ Hoke woulal navel baliayear Buty We(tceet tine cant aae gf ‘the feminine conscience 1s less sensitive to the distinc-|sought the assistance of a little, infirm Tas HELP @ | ‘unings, and calmly struck out the best batsmen on the othes a ‘tion of meum and tuum than the masculine? The men use co eerover the money, The ma-| % witht THE 6 | team. 2 __|chinery o! © law was set In motion, | a “Murder!"" id ti a“ Jere reported to have made free with the Turkish cigar-|sut i¢ moved slowly, and the “bad man" | 3 iy SARS) | never do enotusrtelroxe at mor “fre'l Sunt aie at oe ang ettes in Mr. Belasco’s smoking-room; where they were | went very often to the lawyer, until the | “ Tn ANT) wean (sissy ee! | grin foolishly at his picture.” (Which, by the way, proved @ expected to take one they grasped the opportunity to|]Jater, iis Mt of irritation, ordered him 2 fe ve.rhe g Ceirsct prophess . 5 ' filch a handful. Men at public dinners show an avidity | “igor out of here end ctay out of i Cm > vovsa_/ | Meantime Fogarty had strolled up to Bowerman, for the cigars that may come within the definition of |Get right away. re) 4H 3 vate rout re wpteken oer? nase tiwial crete me x Get ® : elf. a batter ithe souvenir habit, out adh arenes eens all | made up of me un’ you, we'd make do Pennant a continuous, But are not the Indies usually the worst offenders?) 77 (phe Gesperado looled Ree | p'form'nce fer de Joyn The testimony of hotel men would be interesting on this ‘point. There is a prevalent impression that many house- ‘holds throughout the land preserve little linen or silver “trifles” that recall a trip to New York and a week's mtay ata palatial hostelry. Possibly these abstractions ‘were provided for in the bill without itemizing. THE HOYT NECKLACE REWARD. The suit of Harriette Schade to recover the unpald and before he knew what he was doing he was backing out of the room. When he reached the street he burst into tears. The inhabitants crowded around and asked him what was the matter. “He druy me out,” he wailed. ‘“Druv me right out of the room. Sald he's tired o' lookin’ at me and won't let me come back no more.” “Why didn't you shoot him? asked the crowd. “Shoot ‘him? echoed the slayer of many lives, > SCRUBOING 1 bs STATION-HOUSE FLOOR wouLD IN THE RUSH HOURS, New Yorkers in a crowd walk at the rate of two steps per second. If the police will permit, stand at the entranoe to Brooklyn Bridgo and watch the crowd pour out in the morning or pour in at the end of the day. The column as it marches past the Pulitzer Building ts formed in elghts and tens. Fix your eye on some stationary object and count, the passers, Two groups of elght—sixteen persons—is the average for every second of the rush hours. The average is’ “Shoot him? Hi ouldn’! 3] 407 OFF A FEW 80 high because fur long periods the rate is twenty per balance of the alleged reward of $5,000 offered for the|coulin't see. Hel dest and meaaee Povnos second, or 1,20 per hour. Estimating the average step af feturn of Mrs. Hoyt's $25,000 necklace has another as- hear. He couldn't run and he couldn't | « twenty inches—and that {s nearly correct—the speed of the beside that of a broken promise to pay. This is} e legal status of a pledge or promise made on the spur ot the moment under the impulse of great emotion. | For example, when Richard offered his kingdom for a horse, if some one had provided the much-desired steed gould he be said to have acquired a valid title to the een in question? “© For our instruction we may recall the noble senti- ents of unselfishness that are finally aroused in the ‘o of ‘A Message from Mars” after that message has duly delivered and digested. Readers of The Even~ ig World will remember that a reporter for this paper, ised as a trainp, collected only a few cetts from the fight. Why, fellow-citizens, if I'd a shot ‘him {t would ‘a’ been murder,” e 8 “I guess McDonald thought to the end of his troubles lssued his. ultimatum to the strikers," sald Abe Gruber, “but he reminds me of an east side story. The rabbi after a wedding told the bridegroom, ‘Friend, thou art come to the end of thy troubles.’ A week later, the bridegroom, his face very much torn and battered. oajled on the rabbl. He sald: " you married us you said that was t end of my troubles. Now, “My friend,’ sald the rabbi, say which end of your troubles it was.’ he'd come when he ROP SKIPPING duce their weight. SRFORE RETIRING Commissioner Greene has “retired” two of the fattest men on th e force, and other obese policemen are tremblingly trying to re- Now that Greere’s set out to harry the obese constabulary There’s a wild and hectic scramble for each brand of anti-fat; So here are a few samples that may serve as good: examples Of the gentle art of changing figures r 040004 og ‘ound to figures flat. VERY 4/9NT OW *119 FRaT WHEN WIS WIRE. HANDS HIN OYT ATOUT Like THIS! e-gcing audience that had taken Mr. Hawtrey's les- ERS. B Peart dae sent nee 1oue ato. Thain bereveleas |e lee oe Some of the Best d for thelr fellow-man congealed as soon as it en- QUESTIONS, @ountered the outer air on leaving tho theatre. + So there is much for us to ieara to our profit in watch- {ng the Schade suit. If the $5,000 offered in the extremity @f grief at a loss dwindles down to $100 of hard cash when the grief is dispelled, is there basis for a sult? It ill be interesting to know LOVEMAKING IN PARKS, A prudish correspondent wrote some time ago to pro- ANSWERS. 235,006 Population, To the Edttor of The Evening World What is the population of the city of Hanoy man? A.C. It Shoald By “She Is a Good Fhot,”* To the Editor of The Evening World | Istence of the Giants’ Causeway? cause Ireland abounds in sham-rocks having met @ doctor? CONUNDRUMS, Why {s “D" like a erying child? | makes ma mad. It} Why have we reason to doubt the ex- | Be- How would you describe in one word | Met-a-phyalcian. | Jokes of the Day. HIS PERSONAL EXPERIENCE. “Don't you think that people pay too much attention to money nowadays?” “No, I don’t," answered Senator Sorg- hum. ‘Time was when a fitty-dollar bill looked as big as a farm to a mem- crowd is slightly more than two miles an hour. ON THE EVENING WORLD PEDESTAL, 4 | 74 2 ber of the Legislature. Now he won't test against public lovemaking on ferry-boats and pleas-| In speaking of a markewoman, is it Penne tu peenntocd ony We peas and] pay any sttention to it whateve: ’ Bre steamers; the exhibition of the youthful ardor of calf | Detter to say “She Is a good shotter” or {anes z Washington Post. ® ‘ove had displeased him greatly. Now comes another "She is a good shooter?” What waa the name of Pontius YES? She—Are you fond of tea? He-Yes, but I like the next letter bet- | Pilate’s great grandmother's straw-bon- | net maker? Nobody knows. | Why {s an undutiful son Ike one born | PRANK LIU A Is Rig! To the Editor of The Evening World Correspondent venting his indignation at the amorous eourtship that goes on on Central Park benches on warm 4 eais ter.—Yale Record. ; ; ; ; deaf? Because your voice 1s lost on 3 @venings. Among his denunciatory adjectives are “dis- ehh niad Paper tal Sane ie him, COUNT ONE FOR HER. 4 » Busting,” “disgracoful,” “brazen” and “unrestrained.” re Ww. J as Why is one who lives by cheating ‘The Count (old enough to be e erand- 3 :) > >» Cannot the critic turn his eyes the othor way while They Are Not Colors. iarereeiees the sharpest? Recaune he) 71.4 oraer forming = bridge of oiatohes father Cod after atias (alone ont BAe 1 i » Feloicing that love still makes the world go ‘round as 9¢| 10 the PAitor of The Evening World Take thin plank, aboutia quarterot| Why ls « watchman ike acmill harsett eae colleys: Fut a myateh con fale Pell Paulas ied she ai %y \ f yore? Has the:parlor lover rights that are to be aenied| Are lack and white colors? If not}an inch thick and eight. inches wide, | Becaase he goes rounds a asrcien: Ieirae thas te ticstae anes, es, in alien Money cnet] amen! pied Seat ‘he’ park-bench swain? Is the quality of drawing-room | Pitt explain why not R. and twenty-eight inches in length. Place| what is the difference between the A s 5) affection superior to that of the green sward? You hold er hand and she holds yours and that's a very good ‘eign that all the world is still young, lads, and all the re green and likewise a goose Is still a swan and Ee aueece and none more radiant than the park- won't It be funny to call you papa?— Léppincott’s Magazine. BURNED HIS MONEY. “You knew you were going to lose your money when you bet on that horse, didn't you?" Black {s the absence of color. White 1s a combination of all the colors, a fourth. This forms a square, No. 1 match ‘being underneath the two, and No. 4 over. You cay follow this plan until the bridge is made, and it ds then | self-supporting. MISAPPREHENSION. {thet what did’ you do tt fort” } wanted ow ‘am, by George, * that I wae a ‘hot Sport! chloags The halt bright? pee. iy. makes you ask such a i question?" NOT A HIGHBINDER. “'Cause, I heard Mr. Highball “You don’t mean to tell moe he’s a that If pa was half bight he would m never have married you, ,t said he was @ ‘light~ this plank on a table sl horizontal, anq it will be out of the) Prince of Wales, a baldheaded man, an dent that) orphan boy and @ monkey's mother? Yes, if Couple Are Residents, the least touch will na tt the|'The Prince of Wales is an heir ap-| To the Editor of The Evening. world ground, On tho plank thus dalanced parent, the baldheaded man has no Can a marriage ceremony de per-| ace ® mewsparer shoeti, then 4: YoU hair apparent, the orphan boy has nary formed in the State of New Jersey | *rike, the portion of tae glank whch) q parent and the monkey's mother 1s a without first taking out a license? | gevenaee LHe GRBAC TAU NIE ne hairy parent. TO THE LOCALLY tLLusTRIOUS @tevads Stranahas, Collector of the Port of-New-Yormy ~ See, Children, on our Pedestal Nevada Stran-a-hen! ‘When smugglers Uncle Sam would hector We made him Government protector (In guise of local Port Collector), 7 To exorcise the emuggling speqre. Beneath his legal ban. F the misinformed person who said that all d loves @ lover? On the contrary, the world ‘lovemaking in others and when sufficiently ob opiate ftin the papers, But the lovers re, and if they think about it they may reach sion that criticism is mainly envy. If they seill pay: n9 attention to rebukes, but A CLARKE G. WIGGLINS, ne plank will veriet the! Why is a schpol examination like a. “Rob! ” lutely, as 1° it had Leen umied) tin can tied to a dog's tall? It is bound Re jena.’ to the table, If you sirlxe hurd you! to occur (a cur). To the WAltor of The Evening World: will perhaps hurt your band or break! why is a woman drivi “1 a y Ing eight chick- sho ee ‘Robin Hood?” G. C.D. |the plank, but you will not raise the| ons {nto a hencoop like a woman, going loward Pyle wrote and illustrated a! f newspaper which holds it, The| South to recover her health? She Is sheet of Paps ii << “Mr. Highball is a e. book of that title, mith and De Koven | quick compression of the alr which is|{3;n& 0 recuperate. (Re-coop her| Mt Ja ew oe of he feud jevetand: Plain ‘Dealer respectively wrote and composed the/ exercised on a cousideradle eurface ts hat tive the inventors of opera * Hood." sufflelant to explain this vhenomenon, | reliroads In view? faocwmarives Bev