The evening world. Newspaper, April 29, 1903, Page 12

wa". THE w EVENING .» WORLD'S » HOME # MAGAZINE ‘ie \\ ‘Publisned by the Preas Publishing Company, No. 88 to & Park Row, New York. Entered at the Post-OMce = | at New Yo-% as Second-Class Mali Matter. haath alienate! VOLUME 48.........000s000s0544.NO, 16,226. | aaa ae ai) THE FRANCHISE-TAX DECISION. By the decision of the Court of Appeals sustaining | ‘ he cer ttutionality cf the Franchise-Tax law the city gets these immediate benefits: Revenue to the amount of $15,214,264 comprised in the three years’ back taxes assessed under the pro- visions of the law on street car and transit lines and gas and electric companies, but refused payment while the law was in the courts; and Authority to extend the debt limit to include the issue of additional bonds to the amount of fully $20,000,000; And the further gain of a sure if remote reduction of the tax rate >y the added income now assured the eity annually fru.. these new sources. The authorization of a bond issue will give substarme to Mayor Low's comprehensive plans for a great bridge |» entrance terminal and an elaborate municipal building, permitting an expenditure for contemplated public im- provements to which the objection of extravagance no longer applies. These very material advantages represent the first @dequate return the city has had from valuable fran- ehises granted in the past through favoritism or for a trifling consideration. The first just acounting ever had between the city and the street utility corporations is “about to be begun. It has been made possible in large part by The World's vigorous and persistent fight for “the principle of franchise ownership involved. The tri- umph for newspaper and for people js one of the great- @st won in recent years against the encroachments of eorporation aggression, It is unquestionably a final victory, won as || has been in a court whose interpreta- tion of the constitution has, when unanimous, been always upheld by ihe only other court of higher powers, the National Supreme Beuch. Incidentally the decision may be looked to to In- crease Mr. Roosevelt's popularity with the plain people while further diminishing the lessened esteem in which he is held in the regions of merger and monopoly, The blll now validly established as law was one of the bit- terest anti-corporation fruits of his Governorship. THE SHIP-TRUST LESSON. According to a cablegram from London, ‘‘the Atlantic shipping trade is in a bad way. Results of voyages for some time past have shown both in cargo and passenger boats a disastrous loss. There is talk now of a reduction im the sailings of the vessels to and from Liverpool as ome means of stopping a portion of the wastage.” There 1s no hint of a reduction of rates, which was the old remedy in the days of competition for a decline | chair. of business; instead a continuance of high prices, but with fewer boats. ruinous principle of trade. that the great merchant or the great manufacturer has expanded his business. Carried out to fs logical conclu- sidn, it means progressive diminution of traffic, involving the tying up and disuse of many boats and the conges- ton of cargoes and cabin lists into the few. ‘The public 1s getting in the Ship Trust its most valu- able lesson #0 far in the evil results of monopolistic over- capitalization. The Ship Trust bought {ts boats at ex- travagant prices, paying $1,000,000 each for many not worth half that sum; paying for the English liners! “three and four times their true value,” as estimated by London financiers. To cover these inflated values {t {ssued bonds and preferred and common stock to the amount of $170,000,- 000, an enormous total. How well Wall street under- stands tlie emptiness of this valuation is shown by the | quotation of the common stock last week at 11 and the referred at 30. That is to say, the $60,000,000 of pre- ferred stock has now a market value of $18,000,000 and the $60,000,000 of common is worth $6,600,000. One hundred and twenty million dollars reduced to! $24,009,000! In the whole line of “undigested securities” there is nothing comparable in collapsible qualities with | this. Yet the Ship Trust, otherwise the International ; Mercantile Marine, is a merger made by approved Mor- | gan methods and sealed, certificated and delivered to a confiding public by Mr. Morgan's banking house. It is) the master's own handiwork. | MAY MOVINGS. The “greatest of May movings is at hand.” In the increasing tendency of citizens to seek new residences &s the whim impels them {is the philosopher to discern @ grave fault of the American temperament? The lure of a porcelain bath tub of a parquet floor, | the approach of a premature warm wave jn spring, or an innate restlessness prompis a change of abode, and household goods 2nd gods are transported to another borough, perhaps across the river to another State, Whence, in al) likelihood, some future May moving will See them returning, Is it to be wondered that we marvel at the occasional | Mewepaper story of an old man dying in the house in which he was born? Is the charge not justified that we Gre an unstable and mercurial race, always aeciking sume | new thing aud perpetuelly desirous of a change? | Well, has not the desire for change been good for us? | Te it not partly for that reason that we have made the Great progress we have among nations? Is it nota mani-| festation of that versatility of mind which kecps us in| itm’ OTM Hreaies World ii, | Waen a cquple are married, whose tue van everywhere, putting our manufactures in the | in it ty start the kitchen fire tn ) most distant markets, building bridges In Africa; send-| te morning? A says It In the wifo's 426 locomotives to China and mowing machines to the | # *8%# Mt ‘# the husband's, Which is felds where Ruth gleaned; making idols in Philadelphia Pangere?” Fala ee Bay, Hy for Buddhist temples in Sinm; supplying ehoes for Eng-|— Tuesday, : iepeem feet and fezea for Turks’ heads; furnishing for for-| To tne Rattor o! The Evesing World spe Cousurmption almoet everything, indeed, except coals| On what day of the week did the 7th ae Neweastle? \@ay of January, 1982, fall? COVE, But the boundary line between good and bad is very | SFC: Not Latin, Means Brother, ht. ‘Whe palmist jooking at the fork a1 the end of | “head line" tells you it indicates versatility; fork is pronounced he gays it shows you are~a lar! sitniler token could not the critic use a somewhat word to designate the impatience and restlessnes: ved €xpredsion and outlet in @ constant shifting b least this restlessness is a boon to the storage man. It accounts for the tall, fortress-like cat all over the city and is the basis of at the euchre parties he invariably sug- gests @ Bermuda opton for the booby This 1s tho few sales and large profits idea. It is a/ prize so he can present It to the winner It is not by such methods} With the remark, “In onton there is strength.” | coffee, bet it} BUSINESS SUCCESS BOY, IS STRAIGHT \HONESTY 1S THE BEST PoLicy. OOOO It you want a badge send « two-cent stamp to Prof, Joah M, A. Lon PARALYZE THIS PEST! HE vacation season will soon be T here and the rural districts, sea- side, mountain and lakes will be devastated by that pest of the summer resorts—the hotel porch funny man. ‘The merry wag who sets tho table In a roar by whistling for the butter and faye terrible cutting things about the hash. He is the wretch that always says “A rose between two thorns, Miss Mamie,” when he sits in the middle He always leads the cake walks and From this on the Soclety for the Pre- vention of Cruelty to Humor will wage a war of extermination against thi particulae pest. Do not 0 away on your vacation without a 8. P. C. H badge. Carry it carefully concealed and at the first eign from the summer resort funny man that he is going to work any old Jokes— do your duty! Beginning to-morrow, and continuing until we close the Home for the sum- mer, we will print the portraits of prominent members of the 8. P. C. H THE KEY-NOTE TO MR, CHESTY LECTURES ON BUSINESS INTEGRITY. NEVER HAVE OCCASION TO TELL ANYTHING BUT THE TRUTH, A BUSINESS LIE IS AS BLACK ALIE AS ANY, My" DEALINGS. #DOGS ARE NOT THE ONLY PESTS THAT SHOULD BE MUZZLED.; g Oey ENENING? ESD OSSe MUZZLE 4ND~ BLINDFOLD THE WASHERS DHPIGODP 49O90G3OO DBSOOSS00OS 906 60OO PENSED wiry ® VERY nicety ff MUZELE and patrons of the Old Jokes’ Home. An Old Joke Caught Smoking. Prof. Joah M. A. Long: ‘An Irishman went on @ Broadway car, and the conductor came around for the fares. Conductor—Stop smoking! Irishman—I am not smoking. Conductor—You got the pipe’ in your mouth, Iiishman—I got my shoes on, am I walking? JAMES DE MOTT, 8. PC. H., No. 11 Broadway. Lynch’s Lynching. Prot. Jom M. A. Long Found—A silver watch by an old colored lady with an open face. Wanted—In a first class restaurant, a man with a good set of teeth to strain The people of Yorkville have not heard much of Big Bill Devery for some time, They would Ilke to know if he is transferred to The Evening World's Old Jokes’ Home PHILIP LYNCH, No, 434 Bast Seventy-féth street. LETTERS, QUESTIONS, ANSWERS, Seats 12,000, To the Editor of The Evening World What is the seuting capacity of Madi- fon Square Garden? wH, Kobin Hood, To the Biltor of The Evening World Vieuse give the full name of the noted historic outlaw whose name containsd the word or syllable "hoo: MF. A “Ihurning'? Question, ¢ Bd.ter of Kvening World What ls the meaning of the Latin word ‘ adelphos c. R Monday. | To the Egiter of The Evening World 1 on jo 28st nat day of the week was May JACOB GRUBER Chemploushiy Query. To the Ralicr of The Evening orld Pleas state how James J, Jeffries became heavyweight champlon of the world? JOB SMITH, By beating Fitas:mmons, who at that Hourishing ines of trade in a eity where goods ‘Im storage than in any Man's house ts his castle,” bly the storage ee HE ‘MOVE FORWARD” "c" GUARD! @OF F9CCHEGHEOOOHOHSH ¢ PPROLELHOOOH $406. A subwa spot marked full of flying r xplosion Puazie,” The blast went off prematurely. one straight line unobstructed by rock, Where ts It? GAME FOR RAINY DAYS, | ODD AUTOGRAPH. Here In @ litte game for rainy di Belect a very long word, the longer the better; give each of the player (me held the championship, iava, To the Etitor of The Mivening World jn what year ls the next Presidential £ ARO enact he & large piece of paper with the select- ed word written at the top and let rach write out as many words as WHO TELLS THe PLAYERS WHAT To oa. WovLlpD LIKE TO MUZZLE laborer was preparing to blast a mass of rock. He stood on the ‘The air was . The only way he could escape was to follow a straight line from the ceni¢e to some point outside the radius of fying rocks. ‘There le but BS "a it" tm aman arte ora THE With FAN” ALL ALARM CLocKks{! There need never be a puzzle as to who should wear a muzzle, If the dogs do not use up all the available supply, Let the muzzle’s silent spell guard “fan” and masher, crank and “L” guard; And on other local nuisances its gentle pressure try. os CONUNDRUME IN VERSE. I'm up and down and round about, Yet all the world can't find me out. Though hundreds have employed their Jelaure They never yet could find my measure. I'm found almost in every garden— Nay, in the compass of a farthing, ‘There's neither chariot, coach nor mill Can move an inéh unless I will. Answer—Circli Fifty is my first, nothing is my peoond, Five just makes my third, my tourth's & vowel reckoned. Now, to meke my entirety, put all my parts together; I die if I,get cold, but do not mind cold weath Anewer—L-O-V-E, Who was the first man condemned to hard labor for life? Adam, We are little airy creatures, All of different volce and features; One of us in gleen is set, One of us you'll find jn jet, ‘Tother you may find’ in tin If the fifth you should pure And the fourth @ box withi: It can never fly from you. ———-| Anawer—The vowels a-é-l-o-u. Why wae the firat DERE'S A FELLER Ns SC cONSInER) ALL PROTESTS) AFTER: OIGESTING: (rms oRse) OOOO: HERES @ CASE FORA MuZz2aret BOYDEHOO9HOHHH99GHHG-O9:909-OF WONT SOMEBODY BRING vez DPDPTDPFLLBOGH9HIOGDT2ID® $00090G9H999HHH9990HH00600OD 4000000006 OO2O9 AVZZuING. ALL (1 OT-HERS-IN-LAW Some of the Best Jokes of the Day. CIRCUMSTANG Maud—I wae so delighted to have met you again yesterday after ajl these years, but—er—really, I felt rather hurt that you didn't introduce me to the gen- tlewan who was with you, Mabel—My dear, I don't consider him the proper sort of man for you to meet. Maud—The idea! If he's the proper wort for you—— 4 help it, He's my 08. Mabol-Oh! To huedand.—Philadelphia A DOMESTIC MYSTERY. Hubby (walking the floor at 2A, M.)— I'd Just like to know why this baby per- sists in staying awake every night, nave cay rouble keoplag htm saleep 10 ve eny trouble ny the ‘dajtime.—New York" Weekly, HARMONY DESIRED, Knippe~Why did Johnson hire all such portly people for his servants? Tucqde—He says that his wife insisted upon having them like that, so they would mateh her new heavy dining-room furniture,—Syracuse Herald, EXPLAINED. the stork brought us @ baby brot Weil vou on Siew are or tie ae MERELY A BLUPPER, Wille-tay, Ba, what'e @ OH MERCY! TELL HIM IM OuT OF F GOOOTGOGODOHVTDT8HGOHGOGHELHHGHOGGHHOGOOHOOD. THE MAN FROM THE WEST. He Delivers a Sermon on Temperance and an Observation on Pretty Women. HE Governor from Salnt Lewis refused a drink. We had talked long and pleasantly, It was about time, Judging by past experience, and'I said the word. “You'll excuse me.” he said solicltousiy. ‘I'm very sorry not to oblige you, but the fact Is I have quit.” M is Startling 1s a poor word to apply to the impression: his statement made. A moment before he had been talking @gainst license laws and revenue legislation. “Why, sir," he had valid, “there never was such a thing as bad whiskey until the Government began to live off st. When there was no ‘tariff, no license, no internal revenue tax, and all you had to pay for whiskey was what it was really worth os a piece of manufactured goods, handled by @ wholesaler and sold by a retatier, whiskey was whiskey everywhere-a staple that no one thought of adulterating. And you got it ina goblet or a tin gtp out of a barrel, Ikke cider, It wasn't a Hcorice, prune juice, chemically tinted mixture that burned your throat and made you w: to fight your father. It was mainly white, warming and filled with the aroma of happiness, It was such whiskey that Rob Ingersoll and Whitcomb Riley apostropnized, It's the tax on tax and on tax again that has led to the aduitéra- tion of the beverage of the true American.” : He had grown eloquent and fierce in his eulogy and de- nunciation. J] thought I knew where the unadulterated might be obtained. u “Thank you, sir,” he said. “I know you are surprised, and an explanation is due you, sir, I have decided to quit— to quit for a time.”* There was a jong pause, and I feared something had caused a breach in our friendship. “Last “The fact is, sir’—he hesitated for a moment. night I took a drink, and, sir, I didn’t taste it. I'm a tem- perance man, I distinguish between temperance and total.ab- stinence. A man who gets drunk is a beast, sir; a beast. He's as despicable asa gutton. Ifa man can’t drink without ee ¥ ing {t he ought not to drink at all. I drinx for the pl taste, the warmth, the mild exhilaration. When I can’t — taste whiskey I'm in danger of getting drunk, and then I quit, My boy, when whiskey don’t tickle your throat let 1 alone. “Used to have a barrel of sunshine at the old Planters’ | House in Saint Lewis. Talk about your cob-webbed bottles from the deepest cellars of the monasteries of romance, exhaust your adjectives and metaphors, and then know that all you've sald ain't a beginning to the tribute that barrel deserved. Col. Grif asked me to take some one day. I knew that Hquor thoroughly. I took a mouthful, rolled it atound and then-in sheer surprise I swallowed it, Whyy alr) water ~ has a more positive taste. ‘Col, Grif,’ I says, ‘I didn’t ‘No, Col. Grit? To that.! He amiled and ordered another. says, ‘I mean it. Whiskey don’t taste any more. Here's where ! quit. For three months I didn’t taste a drop, and then one day I stroli around to tbe Planters’ and find there isn't a drop of that whiskey left to taste.” t We strolled out on Broadway. The Gov rnor forgot-his troubles at the sight of the prettlly gowned women. His chest filled, he carried himself with a lordiler alr, set bis soft hat straight upon Wis head and returned every glance his unusual appearance attracted from women with Interest, “A masher,” he sald, ‘is the reincarna:ton of an Arian- saw ragor-back, the meanest hog on earth. But prétty women were made so that the heart of man might be miade glad. I'm thankful for every one of them, and If o1 by without my seeing her I wish you'd Jog my arm. AS TO THE ETERNAL KISS. A medical newspaper has come out with a serious, tte dictment against the old-fashioned habl: of kissing, which, it 1s declared, has been slowly but surely golng out of fayor, One 4s inclined to ‘magine that, as it was in the begin- ning, 0 now, kissing is never out of seasoa, says the Lony don Express. It kissing seems less frequent in society than {t used to be it {s perhaps because everywhing is more formal and more artificial. , ‘There are bygientc objections, but these are not likely te affect the time-honored pastime of kissing. * ON THE EVENING WORLD PEDESTAL. >- Wags, Children, on our Pete tal lexr Grau 8 ease; The to whom New Yorkers owe Grand Op’