The evening world. Newspaper, April 23, 1903, Page 14

meme MNi kil) iiiha a Dk dad ik ah oS a ON NR a a a <2 THE w EVENING » WORLD'S 2 HOME .2 MAGAZINE HES GOOD ADVICE, WITH THE 2 Bs SeoHomorld. | R. CHESTY LAVIS Pubtiuhed by tho Press Publishing Company, No. 63 to 6 ¢ _ Wark Row, New York. Entered at the Post-Office 1B AHA’ MY LITTLE MAN, LET ME GivVE YOU A POINTER THATS 1T! CALL OUT WHAT 1S UPLIFTING ALWAYS CALL OUT at New York as Seoond-Ciass Mail Matter. THE NEWS THAT 15 CHEERFUL wuXTtRy ! 3 NWOLUME 48.......0cccce00000..NO. 18,220. | WUXTRY NOt THEY Wonie noe at, AND EN- is ont! 3 WusTRY BRUTAL AND BAD Gwen C] SLUGGER AN OPPORTUNITY NEGLECTED. |° A eaead ttt For stalwart and uncompromising honesty we must Yommend Senator Martin, who, scenting bribery at the ) rst sniff in the Senate Chamber, nipped it in the bud 4 ‘forthwith. He might, indeed, have performed a better @ervice to his constituents by tracking the rascally ES. Tobbyist to his lair and unearthing and exposing him | the deserved execration of his fellow-Senators; per- _ Bape Mr. Martin was a trifle premature in his celerity of _ @etion. But at least he did not stop to parley with the tempter. OER — The Senator's exhibition of conscientiousness was Mate at the time Commissioner Monroe's municipal ‘ electric lighting bill was up for consideration—a bill in > ‘which there was much to commend, but which the city o aut Bot care to have passed with any taint attaching The Senator conducted himself with it self-re- eet a he had acted on his first iuoalzetis would, THE OLD _ the says, “have kicked the contemptible creature down iy the steps of tho Capitol.” Such a deed would have JOKES ‘Perved a8 a fine example, and the Capitol steps ever etter might have been a Tarpelan rock to which a grate- ful State could point with pride. At a time when there He Saya New Yorkers Are Formal and That They Don’t Encourage Smoking. HE Governor from Saint Lewis smokes long, strong, / black cigars. When lie 1s busy, he says, the efgars y; help him to concentrate; when he is idle he smokes {8 80 much loose talk about corruption at the Capitol DIONT YE Geikiac (here iu nothing else tide. it would have been greatly to the Senator's credit to HEAR ME’ “Funny place, this New York," he sald, “Have to look have performed a public service by holding a corrupter WHISTLE } yourself in a room or walk the streets if you want a smoke. contem: ‘Pardon, sir, but smoking isn't permitted here,’ says the boy ee Brae aoe could then: Baye)enounted around the hotel. ‘No smoking, you,’ says the brakeman on at one step to the top of The Evening World's Pedestal 6 | iat f \ { ©| the ‘L.’ I've thrown away $5 worth of cigars in two days. for the Locally Illustrious. : “Got in a Third avenue train the other day, in one of those open cars that out in Saint Lewis we trim up with electrie lights, @i1 up with girls, and run out to some summer garden for a moonlight picnic. Sat way up in front. ‘Smoking only in last elght soats, says the brakeman. Think of that, now! In New York! Eight seats of one car for smokers. Why, quit the game and be good. Harry Hill was much older sir, I was po startled that I rode by two stations before I ‘sth of conscience began to turn his thoughts S thought to scramble back into one of the eight and get busy i ter things; he was near sixty, while Corey con- . = with a perfecto. é Besses to only thirty-four. ee ‘ : KJ © “Nom, out in Saint Lewis we have smoking cars on every Gewey has mail t line, and a gentleman can smoke on the big, broad bacic ry. le a great deal of money out of his in- platform of any car, and a hotel that didn't permit smoking famous dive—perhaps half a million. In his six years pretty near everywhere except in the ladies’ parlor and } of proprietorship nearly two million patrons have paid ladies’ dining-room would be deserted, and any gentleman | their entrance tee—masculine patrons; for Ed's chivalry »| can emoke in nearly any old kind of an office, Result: Men ‘amitted: women free. Ho has survived nine police Ce ne earn RE TOI OF Daper eee ee eaptains, justifying an old remark of The Byening World GOING TO BE GOOD Now.) Ba Corey, proprietor of the Haymarket, is going to aT’ US GEMS IND bacco, Miss Paula Edwardes, 8. P. C. H. lo smoking allowed,’ says the brakeman. “428? ST. > ‘No smoking aloud, 1s it?’ says the Irishman with the Ra Se “though captains come and captains go in the Ten- = T must not be thought that we are f ; S cilia the Haymarket goes on forever.” Corey has | Depts Ped hia ea aioe > ‘ é @ | pipe. ‘Well, then, give mo a see-gar-ect and I'll whlaper, ‘Deen occasionally raided, and in repentant intervals has le hands of fair femininity. Wel © Z é.\ in alas Svar measiest eal tuted with his up to Provided hls patrons with Sunday night prayer-meetings; | Publish herewith the picture of evel | ¢ a sl : % | some thousand dollars. Met him accidentally same evening / but it is his proud boast that the place was never put| badge. | Ie" of business. It was his further boast that a visitor| Miss Edwardes has been heart and Pe oC ee introduced us again. Said I guessed he'd forgotten me, Mader his roof was as safe as a soul in the movement since its inception. ~ i Morey has a fond of m Sucst at the Waldorf. |Gn visitors’ day at the Old Jokes’ Home , / : Z ! 2 been po Tong since wo met. ‘Then it kind a dawned on him, ie lemories of Tenderloin life—| she 1s always there with pig's foot Jelly | ¢ ¢ Ve GE and he said ‘Oh, yes; you're from 8’ Loo-ee.’ Right sociable | @iemorles that need not be envied. He has seen fresh| and flowere ¢or the old jokes in the in- When he Sot |ihawed. Pit there ienitié hoy, aod (Hela Young girls enter the Haymarket in the pride of physical|firmary. At the entertainments for the Leet sell Be by meme. rou sek any ce thers aan (the eis nat aly 1 Saal Al those given for the you'll get my 1 name, city and State, and ike as not statemen| made) and leave it eee ‘end the Boclety the first yolun- they'll be able to tell you when I came, whet I had for din- er drunken and broken in health, ready. for the f teer ‘s pretty Paula! ner and who's drinking with me. Now, out in Saint Lewis fhespital or the morgue. He has seen boys without num-| we have always been ready to print you're introduced to a man and he never forgets it; or, if ber take their first step in dissipation through the Hay-|the ecreeds of our detractors; those he. does, he's as embarrassed ag a Texas ranger ‘who'a ‘lost’ (market's easy and inviting door, where everything ee have been few. ‘We will now publish |, Perea fray rio aA det Maomict yd ; : have to make @ record before the boys around a hotel willl: ‘ ‘e@ptrea to expedite their start in drunkenness and de- the pista hedge at ey be able to repeat your name straight five minutes after! anil Vice was made very attractive at the Hay-| Mies Edwardes's letter: Heide een toldsrene Seorelary, Hay wouldn't impress them ' Prof. Josh OL A, Long": i $ —— “Why, sir, I saw a lightweight, hollow-eyed man who “The Hi ‘ket supplemented and continued the I send you my picture, ehowing me 3 es might be anywhere from forty to seventy years old burry- at my hotel. Safd ‘Howdy,’ and put out my hand. Looked i proudly wearing my 8. P, C. H. badge, us missionary work of Harry Hill's place in Croaby| not tor publication, put as an evidence podiabirney Serer PPirarean et leatad es es beginning the uptown movement of the dance|ot good faith. Yours for the 8. P. C. H., LIMBURGER CHEESE 1s BEING. 4 0 ° all l : {9 BE } | high hats. ‘Who's that?’ I sald toa man walking near, He hall, Though dating trom 1871, its great notoriety was Nines ee EEE USED BT HAVANA To EXTERMINATES | oke4 at me and muttered ‘Don't Know.’ He looked sus leved till the early elghtles. ‘There wore epasms| cason the Bhuberta: in “Winsome £6 Fling SHARKS. — WHY wor A, . picious and walked fast. ‘Who's that? I said to a news-. ‘reform virtue in th penne ee f RKS:— WHY fy: APT IT ONE muah noe! he kala. ad: went On mache a eee a those days also, and the dives were} winn'e,”" a musical comedy by Edward TO THE ABEVEAUSE 2 Roy. Dae ¥ RAD M Bes AMG, and mat is 2 noise. lonally closed. When Corey took the place it had| Paulton and Jacobowski, the authors of fs ell, air, 5 'm persistent. I found out idle for some time, But in its thirty-two years|“Erminie."| Bhe 1s to have the finest fully twenty-five were passed with its doors] Production and the most expensive cast ni Broadway. (All becau! ) mide open with cordial invitation to the public, She ts pretty and talented and wea eee‘ St is a commentfiry on the thoroughness with which|constantly a badge of the Old Jokes 66 Tenderloin has been “‘cletmed” that in the six years of |Home. If vou would Mkewise be pretty Corey's tenancy the Haymarket has not been suppressed, | ®™1 successful send a two-cent stamp 2 é ; ABN for a badge of _ Pilere are resorts which cre doubtless much worse; but, tobi sae a imal ding as it does at the intersection of main travelled Wire end Ambulance Both Busy. q in the Tenderloin, it Las long been one| prot, Jou M. A. Long: a @bvloe’s worst lures, I called up the blue ambulance to- day, when Central told me the wire oc Pie busy, so I send by mail. This LETTERS, WAR OW AVEO SPEEDING) who it was. Who do you think? Why, John D,' Rockes feller! One of the men I wanted to sce. But think, think {f you can, of any man, boy or policeman in Saint Lewis not knowing Dave Francia, ‘Awful suspicious people here in New York, Speak to ® man in a car, on the street or in the hotel, he gets glassy and slides away. Want to know the record of everybody in your family down to your grandmother's last aunt before they'll do business, and yot I got steered by a friend against one of those ple and cake lunch places downtown where you help yourself to anything you want, eat it, and then ‘walk up to the cashier, tell her what you owe, shove over the.change and go your way. Ghe doesn’t know whether you've eaten five cents or a dollar's worth; abe just Now chauffeurs and drivers fidget as the mandatory digit i Of the stern policeman halts them at the crossing of the ways; ‘_ While pedestrians are sizing up this Traftic-Piperizing To learn if it means smashups or will win them safer days, 4 your word as if there weren't a Mar or a thief in the work, > OPEN-AIR MARKETS. is the first since I recelved my badge: QUESTIONS, ‘Well, slr, here's to the boss of that concern, He put » eS The darkey was looking for the post- good taste in my mouth.” i - cad laa aie ee aed teNaale ‘office, to get a stamp for the letter in ANSWERS, Lee UEEEEnEIEEEEEENEEENAEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEeee ae 8r@) nis hand, and was told that no stamps FOR A FAIR. PUZZLE, CONUNDRUMS, ‘®eported as contented with their lot, and indeed pleased|were required on letters this week. 1 4a hard to think up new. fancy. arti ‘What ts the difference between o ON THE EVENING WORLD PEDESTAL, the enforced removal at which they once protested | His informant told him that "the con-|Not Jf Book Is Copyrighted Here.) oo) axe gor a fair. But here are @ blind man and @ eailor in prison? One 2 _wigoi + Other ish-cart men, wh: trade hi glomeration of the hypothenuse hag dif-|To the Editor of The Evening World: few: Did you ever make an envelope cannot see to @o and the other cannot Simi objecti - th t of neath nin 88) rerentiated the parallelogram so much| Can a person in this country drama-| roo Get six ‘qnvolopes (square oDee gD to wee (nea). less objection on the part of the Street-Clean-| 114: the consanguinity don't regulate |‘tize @ forejgn author's novel without} a. prettiest) and on the front of each ‘What ts the difference between @ sol- dig Department because of its more cleanly nature, are|the ordinary effervescence, and go the | setting the author's permission? DIC Ad Opening ror’a giphunaeadakel two dler and a bombshell? One goes to ji : to be desirous of having similar fixed and perma-| Government lets all letters go free this vee GM. C. | of them diamond-shaped, two oblong vane at other ose 9 mean accomm( week.” He thought over !t and id: af and two heart-shaped. Around the one en isa ti mene le “ate sca igh aConded\ them,” Commissioner "Well, boss, dat may be true, and | the Bitter of The Ovaing Wert in| With diamond-shaped opening paint wild ‘When he hasn't got quite enough cagb. 's sagacity in making the innovation ts fully|; qon't’ say it ain't; but Just suppose|,DId Blanche Bates ever play in} sey and put these words on with gold What is the liveliest city in the world? trated. dat de eccentricity of de agKregation | (Under Two Flags" at the Academy of | paint, "My Summer Girt.” On the next A movement along similar lines of improvement is in| transubstantiates de {gnom{niousness of sd " = lone with oblong opening, paint holly to put an end to open-air huckstering on west|4® Puppendicular and sublimates de pus- No, These Is No Premium om Them | and mistletoe with "My Winter Girl" in peculty of de consequences, don't you|To the Eéitor of The Evening World: gold, On tho third, with heart-shaped streets, where, particularly on Ninth avenue oD| qua:incate dat de Goverment would con-| Are the 1002 pennies of higher value| opening, paint hawthorne, with ‘The nights, an immense amount of refuse and offal] fsticate dat ere letter? I guess I bet-| than others, and also is the United|/ Girl That I Adore." The fourth has @ fs cast into the street from fish and vegetable and poul-|ter put some stamps om for luck,” States Treasury paying a premium for] diamond-shaped opening with violets Berlin, because it ig always on the Spree. sl When ate we all artiste? When we draw long faces. What t# bookkeeping? Forgetting to return borrowed volumes, Why 1s a dinner on board @ steamer thy carte R. U. B, & P. C. H, | the return of some? M.8,PRESANT, |and "My Prettlest Girl.” The next 1s like Easter Sunday? Because it ie a Reet 9 East Ninety-sixth street. Monday, April 16, an oblong opentng. with a single pansy movable feast, “The sight of these busy small tradesmen at work Nailed to the Door. To the Baltor of The Evening Work: and “My Wittlest Girl." ‘The last one is What is it that a day has and every- Supplying their customers 1s picturesque from some] pir sos of, A. Long: . ‘On what day of the week was April & beert-shaped opening mith forgettat- thing else in the world hes glso? An R of view; strangers, at least, find it so, But the] Please put this in the foe chest: 10, 18%? On what day of what month De Oe tan eeimean outlined end, ne ‘ and Besex strect open-air markets had this.qual-| Among the children of a certan school | did Easter fall that year? Re |e ene ee ee ae a, le a. benbive: lke 0 apes or 7 boy, whe eV: 3 cause @ bee: der). It is a merit of rather minor consequence to stand | W** * tiny Httle boy, who could not tell| Aatrologer’s View of Marr! lne each opening in gold, and fasten ‘Why is a very angry man like 60 i the number of the house in which he |17o the the Editor of The Bvening World: im the way of a change that is manifestly for the good of|ji\vea. So when told ring it in the se reply 1) the, jetter of C, G., re- cerned, buyer and seller alike, promising as it does | next day, he sald it w Wied s0 tight | questing to know whether the month of decency and order, to the door that he couldn't get It off. | eptember is lucky or not for marrying, together with white baby ribbon. «Make trangular-shaped box of water- color paper, lacing the cornera with r 127 He is almost ready 2 the letter D Vike @ wedding . GREEN, ailkateen or baby ribbon, Around the ring?’ Because you oan't wed arlthout it, Their: Last mk a pay Sk Le AN m oases of she top ‘af the Bax Rept When is a horse net @ horse? When , , ie % holly, mistletoe, forget-me-nots, or any A Ae Sip ares . 41, t turns into @ WORRY THAT KILLS. Prof, Joss M. A, Long: shat aby Aen _ ie Send ee sits other flower, and letter it in gold, What is the difference between @ girl Inclosed are a couple of old-timers “ “Phe bo: . - Rallings, the dressmaker who die@ suddenly, had} clamoring for a last hearing: i is born during September and eres to tba Bares.” bs Peas oan ridlas we & ly x zenn iy ely. c] cy tany thi - Ls nis La om taking: been 111 from e complication of diseases, and she} A chief of the tribe of the Sioux, vader good plane influences, ea than wlth “hol erry candy. ‘These a caon up, and ene 1e:giving © onl & In an inn at Kalamazioux, Beptember would prove to be : sted Demanded a drink around good month for any purpose or] #re also pretty and inexpenolve gifts plied by her physician that worry hastened her end.| yur he hadn't the chink, affair, and the same rule applies to| for Christm yomarkable patieuce,” says the doctor, "but the] So out through the doorway he fioux,|°very month, um |) Of complaints she recelved from her customers | Jeremiah Brown once had a cough An Insurance Query. THE FEMININE WAY, her, When ehe was younger this had not| Which came near to taking him ough. | 7, ing paitor of ning World “The average woman treats her hus- but in recent years it was different.” Re bie EW UY, My father was Insured for the J48t) band about the same way @ servant A hooker of rye, sixteen years. He sailed the high seas. H abr badly put in, an underseam too short, a col-| Though Mandy will threaten and|{ saw soy tather twice In two years, peas Dh Bk He ne the advanced age of seventy-five years. But it is pup (wallop up). PAPA GOT IT, @ pretty good cigar that's @ W-center you I gave yout I guess you're Rot sit properly—little defects ouly slightly Soong." Since then 1 have not heard of nor seen} wpng more he's worth the more she mistaken, tee of the dreas, and remedied, doubtless, aa | 7° New Zork came @ gent from Au- ie for Realy Anwar eare, Dose snd tries to break him.—Philadelphia Press, Fopiey oh, pe. ‘he only aime towne . jaw claim f 5 SEE i ur | ‘s ban mot years of it, and then the breakdown. | Who as doctor his sat could not ergne; and can I cullect the full amount of his aha’ ona rosy in yesterday,—Pbiladol- I ‘of Ife have their cumulative ef- | He announced he could cure ‘insurance policy? rae ie CARVED, phia Public Ledger. ‘than that of graver misfortunes. In| Kheumatism for sure, jt depends on the vonditions of the] ‘iow d'ye do?” said the barber, ‘ , fie Yenng forset them; the middle-aged,|!* You've talent your’ work does) os, oe amerton, piesa "eonlre. 9 ating params Aah f _ | Maude—Oh, Gertie, what # lovely en- mdeavor to make light of them. Au) the pooms you sent» To the the Hditor of The vening World: sod?” the other returned, “That's ; Lic berets engl How Score yout ig "di 6 importa |i Se ec pected peter ai : | ga ea Pe chats f b; : a rasor (he 4 i am weahigih siti, % b | Phligdsiphle Fate ‘ \ XG , i