The evening world. Newspaper, October 31, 1901, Page 10

seh CENE—A small room, a cozy fire, two chairs near together. In one chair a man. In the other chair A woman, thinking, says the Syracuse Post-Standard. She speaks: George, we need a new carpet for the dining-room, He—-Mh'm. ‘A pause. She—You ought to have a new frock coat. He—Yessum. << She-You don't a>, seem very enthus!- (“cooking AALS Z REALISM. A Mterary hack |MRS. ROOSEVELT'S SPICE CAKF. This recipe was contributed to the department’’ of a Karisns astlc over my sug- [newspaper by Mrs, Roosevelt lant eum- gestions. Imer: One cup butter, two cups sugar, He-I am enthusl- [one cup milk, four exes, four cups flour, astic, dear, but I try two teaspoonfuls baking powder, one not to be foolishly tablespoonful ground cinnamon, half Present pretty warm appearance in the clothes I have on. Bhe—Why, they are two years old. Ev- erybody knows you in them. He—Weil, I'm no Pat Crowe. reason to desire a disguise. A pause. He puffs a cigar with an alr of great contentment. She—George, {s that a good cigar? He—Not very. Good enough, though. ‘Three-f'r-a-quart'r.’ ,8She—How many have you smcked to- Gay? He—Three. And two pipes. no pipes and four cigars. A long silence. She (explosively, with an alr of tri- umph)—It costs you a hundred dollars a I've no Sunday, year. He (startled)—What does? She—Tobacco does. In twenty years. if you didn’t smoke, you'd have two thou- sand dollars, without counting Interest. He-My, that's so! You're an arith- metical prodigy, my dear. But old Jen- kins hasn't smoked for sixty years and he hasn't got thirty cents, She (with delicate xarcnsm)—How Ing- {cal men are, aren't they, dear? So much @cre so than women! He—Being logical outside of business hours fs a luxury I've managed to dis- pense with, She—Well, if you can't be logical, I can, and there's no logic In smoking ‘when sou don’t need to and when you need new clothes and can't afford them. He-No logic, dear, but an awful lot of comfort. Did you ever hear of By- Ton's farmus ode: Bublime tobacco, that from eart to weat, ‘Obeers the tar’s labor and the Turkman's rest? Let me tell you what happened during the Santiago campaign. Our soldiers were in the trenches on top of that hill, you know. They hadn't a bit of to- bacco among ‘em, not even a chew, and they were wet and cold and down on thelr luck. ‘They believed Spain wa: going to win, What do you think happened? On the fourth day a commissary wagon threw off a box of tobacco by mistake, thinking {t was a box of that Eagan beef. Everybody emoked up. One man was writing his will When he had smoked for half an) hour he tore up his will and wrote a let-| ter to his sweetheart. Matthewa was there and he he never saw such a change In his life. However, that's not the bnly tobacco} poetry I know, Here's another: Tobacco 1s a Mithy weed. And from the devil came the seed spoits your clothes, yey of your noe It solis your pock Ant makes a cht She—Proceed, do! He—Thank you, dear. I now come to the evil results of toba Toba contains nicotine, a violent poison Wielent that it ts sald that a drop of it om the end of a dog's tall will kilt a| you He-I'm sure { don't know, but Ts dn the paper the other day where Teague of Frenchmen formed te out the use of tobacco— She—I didn't think Frenchmen tobacco. He—They don't. They smoke cigar- ettes, Well, this league, as { was ying, performed some experiments. They inoculated three rabbita and a Fat with a mild lution of nicotine. What do you think happened? She—Go on, silly! He—Well, the mor- al character of thove enimals fell off frightfully, It was something fle rce. became irregular and thelr families were aes Jected. The paper says that anybody ‘why keeps a rabbit can verify this Batement if the rabbit smokes— Bhe—Sh-h-h!) That's the door Why, It's Mr, Matthews! Do com by the fire, Mr. Matthews, and take Morris chair. George, give Mr. thews a cigar. I do so like to see contented! bell |) NOISE OF AN IMALS. further than the sound of any other living creature Next com tl » the owl; after these the panther and the (1, Aackal. The donkey can be heard nitty tA times further than the horse, } Rare can be heard further than that of either the cat or the dog. na to iuited His Flock, Calonei—You only have to preach your congregation would onon Bunday, Uncle Micajan? complished by Arthur Grimth, rooms. | *) and both obtained the sam: HE roar of a lion can be heard} cry of a hyena and then the hoot of | Birange us \t may seem, the cry of a} teaspoonful nutmeg. THE “AMATEUR AUFFEUR! One more enthustast Covered with dust; Bee him go mpping “Get there or bust Look at the face on him; One might suppose Old Nick was chasin’ him On as he goes. Look at the gorgles he Wears as he zipps; Bee how he Joggles; he Swayn and he fips Round the sharp corners and Scorns all his scornera and Jigegtes and Jumps Knocking dogs ally And keeps on till he Runs down or else bumps. Has he a father? Han he a mother? Has hea sister? Has he a brother? If 80, why don’t they 49 Something to bring him to Bee what a donkey he Ta, what a monkey ho Looks like up there On that old rattle-trap, Splitting the air? —Chicago Record-Heratd. A STOCK PHRASE. Ile threw a leg over Ste trusty steed, YOUN CHANCE OF LIFE. €rom 749 deatha In 100,000 hetween the tenth and eleventh years, the deaths drop to the lowest figure at 2% years, when out of §9,(82 remaining only 713 die in a year, At 3) years onty 720 of the 85,441 die, with nearly thirty-etx more yeara of life In prospect. At 40 yearn old 74,108 of the original 100,000 will bo left, but the deaths will be 765 In a year, Increasing rapidly from that age until the maximum number of dcatha {na twelvemonth I reached at 73 yearn; then out of the 31,243 persons left 2.06 will die, leaving the chance of Ife for the others at 7.1 years. At % years old there will be only three of the original 100,000 living. A MATHEMATICAL MARVEL. This is the meatal feat that was ac- the In- diana mathematical prodigy, recently. Gritfith ia faster In his addition than the machines used in banks and counting- In an actual test in which the was pitted agatnat a ma- y hands ofan expert hia mind worked twice as fast as the machine, result. adda long columns of fgu of th as ynickly ax the can tak the gure Lite In a test Grim bree figures each AMERICAN BRACE wlern phyas physlegnomy tn whien morbid which the { xtrongly, and. the ex themselves the THE What ny s nothing ite nay only: -that can stu f Sargent and Alexander, It} ch we ounter o York types of Mr ly, which we In its most youths hy vical attra n, this ideally bner's. ry Amer- STE FUTURE, First’ Balloontst (noticia between two chauffeurs who hay In collision)—Seems to be some down ther Second —What mub!—Meggen BUSINESS ONLY. |! |_A mortuary chapel near Evesham, in Worcestershire, in Inserited “—— Ceme- tery,” An adjacent notice announces 0 admittance except on business It recalls the case of the provincial trouble Haltoontat | “{months,""—London Chronicle, church lately discovered with the 1 scription, “This ts the gate of Heaven, while @ placard beneath added, “This Goor will be! closed ¢uring, the winter fi VOLUME 42. Press Publishing Company, w York, Published by the No, 83 to 6} PARK ROW NO. 14,681. Entered at the Post-Ofice at New York as Second-Class Mall Matter. In urging all good citizens to vote against the Ice-Trust Mayor for Judge, and against Croker’s candidates for District-Attornoy and Comptroller—Unger and Ladd—The Evening World is not departing from its rule to abstain from party polities, whether national or local. The issues invelved are far above the level of poli They y and independence of the judiciary, to the relate to the integr honest and vigorous enforcement of the criminal law and to the safeguarding of the city treasury. 1. THE SEAT OF JUSTIC highest seat of justice in our city. teen years by Robert A. Van Wyck, who has, for reasons known to all the people, been declared by the Bar Association to be “CONSPICUOUSLY UNFIT for judicial office ¢ THE SWORD OF JUSTICE.—The District-Attorney is —The Shall it he oceupied for four- Supreine Court is the SIDE LIGHTS ON THE NEWS OF THE DAY. mirers, and speaking of Ice, that may be why Tammany has It In for him. Devery says he hasn't any fear, which may be a bid for the Christian Science vote. Touchin’ on and appertainin’ to which out in Ohfo a local campaign has been conducted on Christian Sclence Issues. The doctors published a mant- festo against the “Science” candidate, but it re- acted against them, and the object of their ire bids fair to “win out.” Religion and politics never did mix well in the land of the free, any- how. , only 2 P.M. “T know, SS “Commentators say Adam only took to wear- ing clothes after his fall “Fall clothing, I suppose.” — “What Carnegie Did" Is only equalled by what he is doing. Lucky Pittsburg! Will It ask for an afMfdavit that it ls the “best governed city in America?” of the campaign. giving any collateral." _— ed to say I was one woman tn a “You million. “You are, And the rest of the million are Just like you" oe “Jerome and his gang are driving the mer- chants from this town. They are spreading ruin wherever they go,” says Devery. So John Doe's fall collections are not so good as In former years. Perhaps this {s the “reign of terror” that frightened the London Times correspondent. > praise? nator? Incipient paresis? the hand and arm of the Law, wielding the Sword of Justice against all criminals, Shall this sword be intrusted to Jerome, the exposer and prosecutor of blackmailers, panders, swindling gam- blers and corrupt policemen, or to Unger, thsir counsel ? 3. THE KEY TO THE TREASURY.—The Comptroller holds the key to the city’s money chest. Shall this key be intrusted to Grout, who has always been conspicuous as an enemy to cor- ruption and extravagance and a fighter of bosses, or to Ladd, whose public record is that of Croker’s clerk, Whalen’s assistant, Van Wyck’s adviser? All these men are Democrats. Will honest Democrats vote for corruption’s foes or for a Boss's tools and puppets? This is the main question before the pe »ple—the Mayoralty being safe- guarded by the candidacy of two equally independent, honorable, able and upright citizens. > “What are you doing in evening dresa? ut I've got to take a Harlem girl to the theatre In Brooklyn. > Next to the mammoth Twombly palm, the Diggest thing In horticulture this fall is the growth of the Acorns. The forcing process which has transformed the handful of impecun- fous enthusiasts Into a robust political organiza- tlon with 10,000 members Is one of the wonders >- — “Why are you always borrowing trouble?’ “It's the only thing I can borrow without oo Dr. Nicholas Senn, just back from a tour of the world, “pronounces Dr. Kitasato, of Tokio, one of the greatest medical men now living. Now. what has Dr, Kitasato done to deserve this Is there any serum bearing his name, any lymph, or sex theory or microbe extermi- Has he discovered any mark of degen- eracy In the Emperor or recognized any sign of Until we have further infor- mation about Dr. Kitasato we must continue to regard him as a prosaic old-school practitioner, ——_ ae « up to him with respect. The book and play to- gether will soon have earned their fortunate author $100,000, with the distant echoes of the boom yet to be heard from. > —— “Why won't you marry me? You sald I was a man after your own heart.” “So you are; but you haven't caught up with it yet.” I's —— At King Edward's coronation there will be two long rows of barons, two rows and a half of viscounts, three rows of earls, three and a half of marquises and four of dukes—a fine aggrega- tion of “the pus! with only one American rep- resentative, Edward Fairfax. The aristocracy is a British institution which we cannot “invade” and with which we cannot compete, though we may occasionally buy a Scotch castle or a moated grange just to Indicate our possibilities in that line {f permitted. But if a little spot In the King’s throat grows larger all the magnifi- cence will be in vain. —_>+— “I belleve you married me for my money.” “It I did, I earned ft all right.” —_—.—_. A plot to murder Jerome? This Hallowe'en atmosphere Is great for “seeing things.” a anes It appears, on the authority of a Yale pro- fessor, that King Alfred was not considered “You say one of the freaks in your dime “Beo here, you advertise these weeds as ‘Up- great in his own time. Not until he bad been museum troupe refused to throw up his hands to-Date Cigars;' and not one of them will P when the traln-robbera attacked you? What smoke. Sead for! eight conturies (was) thatititle, bestowed was the hero's name?" “He'a our armless wonder.” gn Much of Capt. Goddard's success as a leader in the Twentleth Assembly District 1s due to the fact that he fs a “good mixer." Capt. Goddard meets his conetituents on equal terms, dances with their daughters and even mixes drinks for the boys on festal occasions. “He doesn't stand around Ilke a cake of Ice,” says one of his ad- I don't know what 1s.” public. land In many moons. “Well, If a smokeless cigar isn't up to date SS “Uncle Eb" Holden comes to town In his store clothes to spend some of the cash with which his wallet is well stuffed and incidentally to collect a little more in royalties from the theatre-going Uncle Eb {s the most prosperous char- acter that has come down the pike from book- Ever David Harum looks on him. A fine statue of Alfred, the best in ex- istence, stands In the public square at Wantage, where “the squire’ sees it every time he drives through the village on his way to the moated grange. It must arouse interesting reflections in him. Tim Sullivan's Assembly district con- tains nearly as many people as there were in all England in Alfred's day, and the annual revenue of the realm then would hardly have filled a “dough bag.” AY RNIN? SENS This being the party candidates in such a role, on + Horace—Guess not! won't do a thing to them Farmer Shortsight—'ll Jest hitch the critter to pippins! And old Short- one o' these saplin'’s sight can’t ketch me, while I pick a bushel or neither! two of apples. OOPDPDDES 299 2EEEDIPDTO 9D F-004 o ty A SN HALLOWE'EN IN POLITICS. By R. B. MORRISON. N s SS time of the year for peering into the future for advice and instruction, the artist represents the An astrologer learns from the stars thet Mr. Shepard is going to win by 83,000 votes, but perhaps Mr. Low is getting other information from the apple. HLS DOWNFALL, Horace—Help, help! I'm sorry I told rifi a He this morning and I wisht I hadn't punched Tommy. POPS POLIS HOVE GLP OH DOGS SI Ss 24 RPEIHTEDIELG DDD DOODRECOEMDMDDODAD DED 3 iH EL 2. 3 $ Oh, “And, oh, why did T run ‘Il never do those away from school last wicked things again, and week and tell teacher I anyhow, I'll never go applo was sick!" stealin’ on stilts!” 3 DELHI STLDL-D GEO S-00-0610900 000 0008000600075.90 THE REASON WHY. WHEN FORGIVENESS COMES, When you see a man aympathizing with the under dog in the fight the ghancesiels he has @ bet on him.—Ch! she forgets.—Chicago News, A woman seldom forgives until after | ing a woman compilments and ends by |!s often capable of purchasing an ac- paying her alim THE FINISH, A SUBSTITUTE. Sometimes a fool man begins by pay-| Money may not buy. happiness, but it jony.—-Chicago’ News, ceptable aubstitute.—Chicage News, pay a good price for it, and Tom was elated. But the dealer found that neither care of beans en route. These had become damp and had moulded and swelled, and seem, however, a dreadful pity that a darkened and made wretched on what (Copyright. 1901, by Dally Story Pub. Co.) } HY, yes, John, I have loved an-| other man.” “Do you love him yet?’ John—Oh! Isn't that a lovely le farm, down there?” ery." "I know a story about that farm.” “Tell it. “Once on a time," Jane began, emil- ingly. “That's original. Go ahead." “Well, to be more definite, about fifty years ago, a man lived there, This man managed to eke out a tolerable extst- ence for himself and wife, and a girl and a boy that had come to them in the cabin home, “The oldest of the towheads was Tom, the boy, though the girl was somewhat of a tomboy herself, “Tom learnel from his mother’s lips of the exaltation that men often reach by the ladder 0% books. “Tom learned," the girl continued, “that in New Orleans was just as good market for beans as tn Boston, and— the river ran that way. “He laid his plan before his father. The farmer gave the boy the exclusive use of an acre and In due course of time a good-sized flatboat, freighted with beans, was cut loose from down there, and, manned by Tom and a neighbor who ‘knew the river’ to Louisville, the craft floated away. “One day the boat lay alongsite the levee at New Orleans, A produce dealer came to inspect the cargo, willing to Tom nor his friend had learned to take were worthless. “Tom and his friend walked back. It) was a weary trudge of twelve hundred miles, Tom's friend went on home and | Tom trudged to Danville, the seat of Centre College. Here he called on Dr. Young, the reverend and learned presl- dent that of that Institution, and told him he wanted to go to college, but no money. He also told of the Il give you a note to a friend of the president suddenly sald. ¥. Sherburne waw a reader of even young character. Tne Interview be- tween Tom and this elderly geytleman ended with the brusque statement from the ex-Governor that thts house should ve Tom's home temporarily, at least, but that Tom must work to pay) his beard. “Tom's remarkable progress in cole lege excite! comment, and some were curfous to learn who the brilliant stranger was, “One spoke of his father's sugar plan- ‘tation on Bayou La Fourche; another . Mentioned casually the number of bales of cotton that were grown on his home place In Southern Georgia, and yet an- particularly anxious about rs re-election to the Senate from Tennessee. “When the evidence was all in Tom ther, Enos Stewart, hasa little down on the Kentucky River, support his farm where he works hard to family, and he's about the poorest man in this State who pays taxes at all. But Lcan whip any man on earth who doesn’t ike it." . “They all seemed to tke It. rate no objection was ratsed.’ “Tom—and his father's name was Stewart? Why, that makes Tom Stew- art—Bilver-Tongued Tom Stewart, the most brilliant lawyer and orator tn the State. Why, that's your father, Jane." Yes, sir, and that’s the man I loved before I did you, and, God bless his dear soul, I love him y: At any Harriet ? Hubbard Ayer. THE WOES OF LOVERS By: an Expert. A Troly Pitifal Dilemma. Dear Mra. Ayer: Tam a young man of twenty-three, | and am engaged to a young lady of twenty for the last elght months, and [| dearly love her. I find. one great objec- tlon against her since we have been en-| gaged. She ts lame; It ts hardly notice- | LETTERS FROM—+ +-—~THE PEOPLE. ‘The Mover’s Wall, To the Editor of The Evening Worldt 1 used to laugh at the saying “Three moves Dut cn moving this fall T Ia there no way thi ving from flat to flat may be accomplished without damage to furniture, amashing and loss of brie-a- brac, hideous expense and supreme discomfort? Surely in thia age of progress the moving probe lem should have been better solved before now. vior™ One Thousand Millions, ‘T the Editor of The Kvening World: Please inform me how many millions make @ biliton, we w As to College Educations. Evening World: Tam a college gradu T hed a college education In order that I might better the « 4 fe d i { able. But I am afratd that tf 1 should family fortunes My brother, @ year younger Wy marry her and if we have children they may be the same. Her mother ts lami She has three sisters who are not lame. ANXIOUS. HE probablities are that your | children would be perfectly formed. 90 If the lamences Is an Inheritance, | of course, 1t might reappear in the third | generation, I agree with you that It Is/ a very gerious question. If I were inj your place I should consult with a phy-/ siclan {n the matter, I do happen to! know of several women who are amiict- ed with hip disease, and who have borne beautiful, healthy children, but there would undoubtedly be a chance of re~ peating the sad Inheritance. It does lovely young girl should have her future at the worst Is a chance of perpetuat- Ing a physical defect. Yes “There Is Harm.” Dear Mra. Ayet My flance {s a Very steady worker and makes a very good salary. I love him. On account of his working hours he only calls on me once in a while. Two other young gentlemen come to the house and take me out. Mamma docs not like my having so muny call at the house. Kindly tell me !f there ts any harm in my going with two other young men just because I am keeping com- pany. UT yourself in the young man’s place. If the altuation wei Te- * versed, would you not be very unhappy to know that the man you loved had devoted himself to other girls because you were so occupied with your work that you could not devote your evenings to him? 1 think if you renily love this man and Intend to marry him, you should not accept the attentions of any one el; We cannot serve two masters, and no kirl can divide her attentions in the most innocent way with several mon. If the man Is not in a position where he can support you, and has no pros- pects, you should do one of two things, break your relations with him entirely, or promise to walt until he has shown not only a disposition to care for you but a capacity to maintain a wife and family, COLLEGE EQUALITY. We hope that President Eliot did not speak exactly at Harvard Union as he was reported: “Men in narrow circum- stances will here be placed on a level with all. In thelr college Hfe they can win the soclety of wealthy men.” Rich undergraduates ars not always healthy companions for ‘men in narrow circum- stances.” The richer the student the more likely he is to win at poker, And this breeds discontent. CAIN V3, LOSS, In gaining bis point. a man often loses Nowa quired, 38 and 49) will be Pulitzer Building, New York qu than I, went to work at fifteen. twenty-four, I am twenty-five, a week, I make $12, some one ‘indly tell me if I was wise or @ fool to go to co Also, If a colleg education is @ good thing for a poor ‘a A. @, SPERRY, & BR Yer To the Bittor of The Evening World: Can @ child born in the United States etome father ts not a citizen vote when he becomes of age, without any papers? ana What Shall Harvey Dot To the Editor of the Evening World: There 18 4 lady who seeme to love me, but who treats me very queerly, She promised te call me up on the ‘phone and tell me whem ut ehe failed to The next day wrote me a note saying she had been toe lazy to €o sa Now, was this nice of her? Ien't It @ sign che'e getting tired of wet I always told ber she would, and she used to rue, WII readers hall I be waouey, Bhe te very pretty. HARVEY P. RL OR HOME DRESSMAKERS. Evening World’s Daily Fashion Hint. ie ts now He makes 525 In view of this, will and cross of overlook itt The To cut this Norfolk jacket, with ap- plied plaits, in medium eize, 51-3 yarda 20 inches wide, 23-8 yards 44 inches wits or 2 yards 50 Inches wide will fe re- ‘The pattern No, 3,964 (sizes 32, 24, 36, nt for 10 cents, inahier, The World, Send money to “ f * ok