The Seattle Star Newspaper, April 1, 1924, Page 6

TH APRIL 1, 1924. A Busy April Fool Day La Follette Offers Platform Wisconsin to Urge It Upon G, QO. P. Convention The Se Poduined Dalir + Be witet. Newspaper Boterr Sees of city per F ye pes ny ost « | gar) pont you | e ® Fal oer ( APRIL _ You wanol/ \_ Foot /¢; “ RY Ye ye . . D . What Kind of Navigator Are You? ¥ Puget Sound yesterday two ships were sailing. One was inbound, the other outbound. One sailed north, the other south. They drew sed and widened ne distance between then most directly op- i oleate ce . ne wind was blowing. Lo hel saile opposite directions because skillful yen aboard each knew how to trim their s and use “isir rudders to control the force and power of the wind ithout this skill the wind would have driven both jn the same direction. Sooner or later both would jaye been wrecked on shore. e Be near, going ¥ Seattle two men sail thru life. One is en route for failure and dis e; the other, his eye notched home a star, steers course for prosperity and success. minute the distance between their stations in the torid widens as they plow thru the sea of life in opposite FABLES ON HEALTH— CONSIDERK YOUR FOOD py the recovery of the of millions stolen from easury thru frauéulent war © corrupt leas. resources; and © collect the Yet both, like the two ships, are driven by the same i wer’. hg ate proceed in opposite directions according to ir use of this power, which is Ambition. Ambition is he motive power of each of us. As we use or misuse it our course is set. ‘All of us have the ambition to be prosperous, contented d happy: Character is our rudder ¢ gol our character and the skillful sailor mntrois.his rudder and sails, If we control them prop- gly we shall reach the Port of Satisfaction. If we con jl them improperly we shall reach the tideflats of de- gir and failure. ; : + If we ignore them altogether and go thru life witl t upon the dollars owing us by ronments, the Mellon tax THERES AN Ol. SPat OW Your Cour Senator / a SAG Z yy e our sails, We cor vote of the people. Six. We favor drastic reduc- car tiller swinging, our sails flapping idly, we shall land m the rocks of destruction. R five minutes, lay down this newspaper and think of the two boats, driven in opposite directions by same wind. We think you will convince yourself that Piack plays a very small part in success, and that your failure and success in life depend largely on the way you | Fellowship of tion of the exorbitant duties on manufactures provided in the prohibiting of gamb- eculators and protiteers in agricultural prodacts; the re- construction of the federal re- asd farm loan systems, so eliminate control by specu- World’s Drink Champion EIGHT CUPS ONLY SIP FOR HIM fim your sails and set your rudder. If you feel you are failing, remember that- you have in and international finan- We favor reduction to pre- levels the present freight Praper —_ ll you the same power that is carrying your neighbor to saccess, Learn how to use that power, by observing how he trims his habit-sails and sets his character-rudder. Alcohel's only food value, according ton chemist, Is that it ix an taergy-producer, and that explains tho restless activities of the boot legpers. . F What's Congress Doing? political press has taken a look at congress and is now throwing fits. That body, says the press, has teen in session for over three months, and what has it #me? Answer: Nothing. And there you are—fits! Tt is true that our national legislators have enacted lit- important legislation and that they have often played ty above country, looking at it from one angle, but my become excited about it? Perhaps, in the long run, ey are doing a very great service. There are not a few ge students of congressional history who subscribe to itive assertion that congress is really doing its best n it is doing nothing. It may be a comforting truth. | drop of one-quarter of 1 per cent in the cost of llving Is reported a mere drop. When Opera Is Worth $10 IETIMES the best of a show is behind the scenery J of the stage. | There was that occasion when Calve took her accom- list behind the curtain, at the Mornion temple, Salt lake City, to do some high-class cussing. And the acous- properties of the temple were so wonderful that her BY DON RYAN HE champton was a modest young fellow. He didn’t try to pose at all. He submitted to being photo- graphed—but not at his own solicitation. Only 17 and a world’s champion! Roy Tankersley LARG an engaging and innocent-ap- pearing face, he stood meekly in the center of the local room while the Los Angeles interviewers pressed around him. “Excuse me a minute,” said Roy. “I want a drink.” He went over to the water cooler and drank a paper cup six times empty. “Are you really the champion water drinker of the world?” he was asked. “I reckon you'd call me that.” replied Roy, modestly, “T drink five gallons a day,” “How did you get started on this water drinking business, anyway?” “Well, it was down in New Mexico. A fellow down there give me a big shot of wood alcohol. He said if I ever wanted to be a man I'd have to drink wood alcohol. Well, I drunk it.” Roy sighed. “The durn stuff give me water diabetes. I've had it going on 20 months.. All my blood turned to water. It used to be real bad. I used to have to drink six or eight gallons a day. But I’m getting better now. The doc- tors say lll come thru all right—if I can get enough water. Excuse me a minute, I want a drink.” 2 youth witl Dally Lenten and meditation Commission on t Federal Council of the Churches of Christ in Amertea. TURSDAY Human Responsibiity Bible reading “Men are beginning to nee honesty and tr MEDITATION: In doing |do and « necessary part. | measure Incomplete. ysatisfaction {n work well done. | PERSONAL QUESTION: How can Telling It to Congress that the) | sp adlinees |must pervade all phases of human! life if chvilization ts to persist; they) |are feeling the epirit of Christ call-| ing them to follow him in the great} Christian enterprise; and a rapidly growing number of men are ready to follow him at any personal cost."’ the} world’s work each one has a purt to In the di-| vine wconomy of life each ono has| some worthy task which, unless per-| formed loyally and faithfully, ren ders the universe of God jn this God's guidance | is felt in part in our sense of duty| land this recompense in a sense of! I be pre PRAYER pray (XK LETTER A blessing to the world, be con-| beauty of thy countenance. Let us of it, and not be vainly |not seek to hoard thy treasures, but a? \let the influence of thy spirit flow wo | thru 5 AS tream, be as I erfectly * L, Fagley) FROM VRIDGE MANN April 1, 1924, Dear Folks: This morning while I lay abed, in slumber quite profound, there percolated thru my head a steady ringing sound. T heard {t quite & while, I own—my bean was working slow; and then I thought, “The telephone!” and went to say hello. A volce replied, “This is The Star. You needn't work today. The boss says tarry where you are, and have e@ bit of play. You've had & busy week or two”—{which isn't any jest}}—"so he will do your work for you, while you enjoy a rest.” I left the phone and d to bed; I made ft in a bound. But atill there rattled thru my head a steady ringing sound. I thought, “The phone again—oh, damn!” I went; a voice began, “A Western Unton telegram for Mr. Avridge Mann. “A millionaire of Timbuctoo has died a day ago. And by his will he left to you his stocks and bonds and dough. Please send attor- neys full advice by wire right away”—"By gosh!" ‘ns a nice beginning for a day!" hen it seemed the old alarm had mado a sudden jump. It to shake mo by the arm, and yell, “Get up, you chump! You're dreaming longer than you ought; my bell is nearly burst!" ©, I've fooled myself,” I thought, “but, then—it’s April I murmured, sricultural products. f - We favor abolition of the use of injunctions in labor disputes and de clare for complete protection of the rights of farmers and indus- 1 workers to organize, bar collectively, and conduct uit hindrance co-operative enterprises. LIGHT, We favor adjusted compensation for the yeterans of the late war, not as charity, but matter of right NINTH. We favor a deep wa- terway from the Great Lakes to tho sea. TEN. We favor amendments to the constitution to provide for the direct nomination and elec- tion of the president, to extend the initiative and referendum to the federal government, and to insure a popular referendum for or against war except in casey of actual! tnvaston. ELEVEN. We denounce the mercenary foreign policy under recent administrations in the in- terests of financial imperialsits, oll monopolies, and international bankers, We favor an active foreign policy to bring about a revision of tho Versailles treaty in accordance with the terms of the armistice, and to promote firm treaty agreements with all nations to outlaw wars, abolish conscription, drastically reduce land, air and nayal armaments, and guarantee public referendum | | @xcerpts ss the Congtesasiona: on peace and war. hee plainly heard every word she said. mes now Mario Chamlee, Metropolitan tenor, who jials a Los Angeles paper of his most horrible rendition of é duke in “Rigoletto,” which an audience in Philadel- opera house didn’t appreciate. It being a very warm ; Chamlee had left his suspenders at his hotel. othing to be done but to fasten on the duke gymnasium- trousers with a safety pin. Safety nothing! As the Teached for a high “Rigoletto” aria note, that pin opened and the ducal pants began slipping. say it was funny or anything.” ee, duke, didn’t get a fair hold on the high B-flat “Well, tell us about it, anyway.” ugoletto,” but he got a fair high hold on those pants | Labia Tushed behind the curtain. « ELL, it was like this,” said Roy, wiping his ere was the audience out in front wondering if the mouth on the back of his hand. “I didn’t mean busted internally, by trying to make a stomach- no harm. And as for the goldfish, I didn’t even know HE EIGHT cups he drank seemed to soothe the heated coils of Roy’s internal machinery. He even mustered a grin when the waggish reporter made some allusion to the appropriateness of his name—Tankersley. “You must run into a lot of funny experiences,” prompted another interviewer. “Oh, nothing to speak of. I can’t recall any exper iences which you might say was funny. I had a little experience oncet over in the square, but you couldn’t | “HELPING” THE FARMER | There 49 one thing which we can} |4o to help the farmers, and some of the senators who are willing to| |vote away this mozey are respon-| {aible for the condition which can| emodied. They have put a tax) upon everything that ts shipped! linto this country; they have helped |the trusts, the combinations, the| large and powerful manufacturers Jof the United States to maintain | an artificial price upon everything | | which the farmer has to buy.—Sena. | |tor Reed (D.), Mo. 2 of a i B-flat, and the duke behind the scenery yell- ety pins, furniture glue, or something. Happily discovered that other warblers of the company had pins and the duke was able to pin up and go on part. And, of course, all of the music critics home declaring that Chamlee’s voice was failing, it was only his safety pin that weakened. It was i ler instance when folks pay $5 to see a show id miss the part that’s worth $10, or more. The “Other Man” Cure “i Last there is likely to be disagreement with our es- 5 led writer, Mrs. Walter Ferguson, who concludes article on “The Other Man” with: 4 Jou are having trouble with your husband, don’t de- mi upon finding an affinity; it wastes too much time. easiest, surest and quickest way is to use the rolling- tere critic will be certain to say that this is ad- h Hever should be permitted to fall under the eyes ff husbands, generally. Barring the. instance of Mr. ts to whom, undoubtedly, neither the affinity nor ung-pin cure has been applied, there are almighty a inds with whom their wives never have trouble. altogether a bad thing, either. Perpetual agree- becom Monotonous, just as do perpetual sunshine, irae n for breakfast, perpetual mah jongg, and fe Occasional thunder and lightning, occasional hive Kfast, occasional hair cuts, occasional “seven- their delights, as rejiefs, i Considered, too, that when wife lays on with stk she is apt to hit him on the pituitary or other nable gland and thereby superinduce his reply of hoard, the bootjack or other material : edeaaae and a physical combat rarely pro- Moral reformation on the part of either husband or Indeed Sipe Such means of persuasion very often drive anny to an affinity and the wife to secking “the * for keeps, Diet te he take these observations in the nature cota iM other man.” There may, indeed, be ; ¥8. Ferguson's rolling-pin theory, and jelidiad be accepted solely as advice to wives to llin ee nag be ad of their aim and to er end, half-j heer bands bent on affinities, 9°? YP? ® there was any goldfish in the durned old fountain. It | was a swell fountain in the middle of the square. Ex- cuse me a minute. I want a drink.” | The 10 cups which Roy consumed brought the water | down to the danger level in the Puritas bottle. | “I knowed I was in for a spell of hard drinking,” Roy | resumed, “so there was nothing else to do. I just laid down on the edge of the fountain and started to drink. | After about 15 minutes there was a pretty good-sized | crowd around me, Pretty good-sized crowd. Ireckona | couple-a-hundred people. “Then this cop comes up to see what was coming off. Gee, the guy was mad. He said I was depleting the city water supply, whatever that means. And he said I'd gone and drunk up four city goldfish. They was seven goldfish, he said, in the durn fountain, and now they was only three. : “Now, I didn’t remember drinking any goldfish. Of course, I’m not saying I didn’t. Them things will hap- pen sometimes unbeknownst to the man when he’s drinking. But I don’t think the cop treated me right. He made me stop. And I wasn’t half thru. “Excuse me a minute, I want a drink.” QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS you can get an answer to any question of fact or !nforma- tion by writing to The Question Editor, Star's Washington reau, 1822 N. Y, Ave. Was ton, D. C., enclosing two o stamps for reply. Medical, and marital advice cann | prestige—the candidate of the peo- ple, see | Q. How may skina be removed from peaches intended for, canning? A. Pour hot water over thom, The jaking wilt then slip off without | difficulty and the hot water docs not harm the fruit if 4 is canned at once. ove Q. To what period does the statue of the Venus de Milo belong? A, It is anid to belong to the Hellenistic period, the last half of the second or the first century BO be iven, nor can extended research ye undertaken, Unsigned re- uests cannot be answered.— fbiror. Q. What {s the depth of Bering stralt? A. It varles in depth from £0 to 52 fathoma, eee an “the people's president” and aoe Q Can holes in cherry trees be cemented? A. No, unlike other frult trees, | holes in cherry trees cannot de} ~ | why? | ¢ y “wos A. This name (x applied to An-| 2 What swa drew Jackson, who was lected 10) 4 wanna Karenina’ otiice without @ previous political! org yy many, Tolstoy's grentest iy w consid- , ; AR, WELLINGTON Js" PH ONE =~, ‘CAPITOL 4 0004 A clean, even burn- ing, sootless and smokeless fuel. Made from high - grade Wellington coal. Approximately 80 per cent carbon content. Order aLoad Today More Heat at $9.00 Per Ten At the Bunkers Call Us Uno On (4°) FC. FERREE PR teioenT 801 FAIRVIEW AVENSO00 IGHT, dainty Snow Flakes are the buse of this rich goody. ‘Stir plump raisins into “White Mountain” icing, Drop a spoonful onto a Snow Flake. Then crisp in the oven to an enticing golden brown. Marguerites! Um-m-m! Snow Flakes are fresh from our nearby ovens—and as close as your corner grocer's. 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