The Seattle Star Newspaper, December 1, 1923, Page 8

1907 Baventh Ava Phi United Prowse Service, 0, 6 monthe $2.00, year ed Datly by The Star Publiabt 0, Newspaper Whterprine As mall, out of city, be per month, & month Hy carrier, ctty, 600 a month Ailman, Niooll & mia Rides Van, Spectat Representatives Ban Frangiece Chicago office, Tribune Bide; New York office, Vorton office, Tremont Wide, offica, Monadnock Canadian Pacific To Live Long, Become [ll HE surest way to hve to a ripe old age is to get an incurable disease and nurse it, So said the distin- guished Dr. Oliver Wendell Holmes, Joking? Not at all. He meant it. A mild malady, neglected, may develop complications dangerous and even fatal, ‘An incurable malady often can be fought and held in ‘check for years by taking proper care of the ‘general health. The body’s power of resistance is the thing to worry.. about, rather than any particular ailment that attacks the body. We have known many people, with one foot in the.. grave, who lived on and on for years tho always on the verge of dying. And simply becatlse they took such good care of themselves. Few diseases are more distressing than neurasthenia— Which is a name given by physicians to cover a multitude of ailments that they cannot definitely diagnose. A neurasthenic patient is notorious for developing one ailment after another. Now it’s the stomach, “all shot to pieces.” Tomorrow the stomach is behaving and the heart palpitates. Later the heart steadies and the liver begins acting up. And so on, Thru it all, the neuras- thenic lives on—because the most decided tendency of neurasthenics is the excellent care they take of them- selves. ‘As a result, a pronounced case of neurasthenia usually dies of old age. Winter is here and with it come epidemics of head ‘colds, tonsilitis, bronchitis and what-not. The best weap- ‘on against all of them is to keep the body’s powers of re- sistance in good shape, by sensible diet, plenty of fresh air indoors and exercise outdoors, also lots of rest. As in bat- tle, the enemy is less dangerous than the victim’s inability to fight. - The $3,000,000 verdict against that gum man is something for him to shew on, we'll say. The football season ends and all the kick drops out of education. Did Jesse James Really Live? ESSE JAMES never lived at all, B. F. Dibble claims in his new book, “Strenuous Americans.” The no- torious bandit, according to Dibble, “was a pure creation of the mind. He was born, he lived, he died, in the com- plex and far-reaching imagination of his race. He was America’s Odysseus, America’s Beowulf, America’s Robin Hood. Over a Western bank we once saw a weather-beaten sign riddled with bullet-holes which old residents claimed were from Jesse’s pistol. We have seen other historical relics of his career. We have further been led to believe that Jesse was shot April 3, 1882, while hanging a picture on the wall, and we have talked with old-time reporters who “covered” that shooting. All hokum and bunkum, according to dabbling Mr. Dibble. We'd be inclined to believe that Dibble is joshing—if he ‘weren't so historically accurate in his treatment of other characters in his book: such as P. T. Barnum, Brigham Young, Mark Hanna, Admiral Dewey and James J. Hill. Come to think of it, we never actually SAW Jesse James. Ali we know about him is hearsay, second-hand evidence. So we have to believe either Dibble or the rival faction of historians. The more we ponder this, the less certain we feel of our ground. And the more it dawns on us that 9 per cent of the things we “know”’—things we accept as un- questioned fact—are merely matters of faith on our part. ' Feith is the mightiest of all human forces. Collier’s Weekly offers $1,000 prize for best essay on prohibition—for, - against, or neutral! Reminds us of the school teacher who wrote that he could teach that the earth was round or flat, as parents preferred. Frank Lowden says he doesn’t want to be president, and-that makes it unanimous. Don’t Be an Amoeba! : HEN a highbrow wants to’ call somebody names, he f certainly can do it! There's Glenn Frank, editor of Century Magazine. Taking our isolationists to task for contending any na- tion is sufficient unto itself, he up and calis Senator Lodge “and his kind,” the “amoeba of politi . -* #8 Our bodies are made up of tiny cells which should go on renewing themselves, says Editor Frank. Unfortu- nately, however, these cells are not independent of one another. A brain cell, for example, can exist only a few minutes unless there is a heart cell somewhere pumping food into it and carrying away its excreta. So, when one group of cells is damaged, other groups are bound to be damaged. The whole body suffers and the man dies. ae ae So it is with nations, says Editor Frank. The nations of the world are as dependent, upon one another as the cells of the human body. “Only single-celled creatures can entertain the notion of isolation,” he obsery “Biology thus classifies Senator Lodge and his kind where they belong, as the amoeba of politics, strange sur- vivals from a prehistoric era of the lowest form of po- litical intelligence.” 5 + * And what’s an amoet Webster says it is just “a nucleated mass of protoplasm,” which managed to keep al by the simple expedient of taking on a dumbbell shape every now and then and breaking in two, each part being a perfect amoeba. Not entirely satisfied with that, we pulled “down our Encyclopedia Americana. Fearing the worst, we sought and read: “AMOEBA, or PROTEUS ANIMALCULE, a protozoan classified as one of the rhizopods, a mere drop of ani- mated jelly, hardly visible to the naked eye. eae We hadn't the heart to read further. Who wants to be an amoeba, anyhow? + Washington is agog because Senator Mayfield won't give up his seat. Probably, suggests our stenographer, he caught the habit while riding on street cars. With 17 regular and irregular pres the senate, the government printin season ential candidates on the floor of : office looks forward to a prosperous Might Benefit Here ICH reading: . tax ment i geience fund’ We'd like bootleggir r in ¢ Mucha; Polish bandit, ma itemizing hi properly de contribution. Remind to see Mucha’s plan ado raternity, just to see how national debt. an income His t ribed a ‘con- you of Robin Hood, ted by the Seattle ig a hole it would return robberic pay- a big one, and ‘ The Professor says it isn’t the drouth of prol yet the law-breaking, but it’s the way prohibit versat s that ayed to discuss philosophy, now (ali only home-brew and Whozhoo-in-Bootleggerdom, THE SRATT proposes to introduce his new | WAIN . reatrictive Immigration bill, | tho first day of the forth ‘This measure, which ta dealgned } coming seasion of congress, to take the place of the present Chairman Albert Johnson of the Dillingham "8 per cont quota house committee on¥mmigration law," which expires June 90, “ BAT CHWOS we JaMGRATION \ G ty What wi eats dynam once and Goats are nice in bad by not bath hear goats ki ou never Foats will eat tin cans |bride’s biscuits or what Then eat a shoo for deaner' Goats will start food are always buttnig in? ea namite, Why not 1 tho tuff to people whe A goat in Aurora, Ill, ate two sticks of dynamite and may become France has Germany's goat jthe Aurora Bore soon. feeds it on dynamite, And kicks | : about. Look out, France! | Imagine being chased about the = |yard by a goat full of dynamite Bi a et a What ee be more tryin than trying to Keep a goat full of dyna | mite in a peaceful humor? Germany's goat has gone dr France is after Er Would have it already on} says sho hasn't any goat 1's Koat gland A goat tn the woods fs worth two |in the yard. | | | Hard-headed | goats fear to tr France even wants Italy's goat. | people butt In where | But she can't get that goat, Italy's gon | And the Cars Came Railroads Make Good on Promise to Move All Business Offered A low freight rate and no cars in which to ship is as unsatisfactory as a low price for bread and no bread. Heretofore, fall harvest has brought a wide- spread car shortage. Last year it was 140,000 cars. This year there is generally a surplus of cars throughout the country and especially of box cars in the West and Northwest, notwithstanding the roads are handling the greatest volume of business in their h There’s a Reason! For 1928, all the railroads of the United States joined in co-operative effort and with a de- fined program to improve traffic conditions and to establish new standards of service, even excelling pre-war recor Infulfilling this program, 134,686 new fri and 2,968 new locomotives were put in ser n January and October, 19 a larger number than in any similar period within the past ten years. Remarkable progre of Jocomott has bee and cars awaitt of the cars be n made in reducing the number om0. n in ‘ond coal ha Jumpe {le storage and rts than tn any per car per day in 1921, the railroads made 29.2 miles in 028, the nd moved 40, y of the carrier 00 million dollars for new equipment and 400 million dollars for other improvements, Years tt t 1 builder of th rthwout, billion dollars ¢ ear for abreast of the country's grow the first year in twelve that the railroads to obtain that amount. Such expenditt 1 national pre ity, contributing to and employment of labor, increasing the ) being spent in 1923 is almost entirely new money, and not taken from earnings. ‘The expenditure iw based encourage com embarrass the ral \ orvice. It is not | | this record-breaking it is unlikely that the roads will ¢ the 5.75% on thelr the Transportation Act, but which~if they do not earn t » not get tructive st © no fre Cor ome OR aska Pre December 1, 1923. UNION PACIFIC SYSTEM GRAY Omaha, Oe LE nt ne clongn to Mussolin!. | 1024, has been changed during recens in no important particu lar, vias ‘Tho abolition of the monthly maximum quota admin aible to the country, At present a maximum of 20 When our own government gets the taxpayer'n goat she always re: turns It Just before election Bootleggera h But they d the people dy © the people's goat ed it dynamite, Sell amite inatend. man ge can't get une he Is it 4 his wife's his goat. Sometimes ho wife's goat be Biggest example of # goat that has been eating dyn: is Germany Another way to gat Font ts to laugh when crying. wife's starts your sho Nicest way to get a husband's goat i» by wanting him to have his hair cut lke some movie actor. Small brothers frequently get an older oi Then she has to buy her goat back with candy ‘8 goat —first prize: —second prize: —third prize: Nutty Stuff Rough Neck Copenhagen O’Dolly Gee Whiz per cent only of the total quota of any nation ts admiguible in any one month, The result ls a wild rush for Now York and lonser porte on the part of every transatiantio liner during this first five months of the fiscal year, intenne excitement to #60 what skippers get to port first, and the heart-broken orien of those who, for one reason or an. other, have been excluded, CONSULAR AGENTS WILL, CERTIFY IMMIGKANTS Under the new Johnson bill tt 1s proposed to have our consular agente abroad certify for admin sion the entire quota allotted to any nation, which tn to be based on-2 por cent of the number of nationals of that country living In the United Btates, according tothe census of 1890, inntead of 3 per cont according to the cen: wut of 1910, an at present, Then when the last certificate han been issued, no more can be fanued thruout the year, but the fortunate holders of certificates may fail for this country at any time during the first half year. Under this proponed change in the quota, the total legal regular European and Near East imml- gration will be reduced trom 367,403 annually, an at present, to 168,837, but there {» another provision in the law by which blood relatives’ only once re- moved, ay parents, children and husband or wife, of persona iv- ing in this country, may be ad- mitted Judging from past records and such thoro investigation as the authorities have been able to make, Chairman’ Johnson esti- mates that thin provision will al most double the number of immi- grants admissible, bringing the total up to about 340,000, or within o, few thousand of the present figure 400 BASE QUOTA SET VOR EVERY COUNTRY In addition a base quota of 400 persons ta provided for each one of the 44 countriey affected un- der the law, ‘That 1s to say, Pal entine, for example, which under the new law would be entitled to but one immigrant for the year, will be allowed 401, Albania, whoue quota would be but four, will be entitled to 404, and #0 on. Of course, the biggest change will be in the radical reduction from Mediterranean countries and comparative static position of the Nordic countries in this regard. Italy will be reduced from 42,- 057 to 3,912, and even with all possible family members could not get in more than 8,000 in the entire year. Greece will be re- duced from 3,294 to 447, Poland from 21,076 to 6,156, while Great Britain will be reduced from 77, 242 merely to 62,458, and under the ‘relative law" may very eus- fly bring in more than before. ‘This, indeed, is the purpose of the law, to go back to a time when Italy, Greece and Poland had not started to come to Amer- {ca in great numbers and base our quota on those figures. Of course, also, the law pro- vides for the rigid exclusion of all Orientals and has ‘mportant provisions relative to seamen, but all these important nections will be fought over in due course. LETTER FROM V RiDGL PiANN Dear Ayridge Mann: Lan name), in yingle vorda she Svedish doll! ‘orn long, by yee!” December 1, 1923, J Mturday yon Svedish dame (Ay tank dat Hulda ban her nay, All kinds of fallers fall for me, but Ay yust kid “By gol,’ Ay ban von classy Vell, Avridge Mann, Ay vant to say Ay tank das shicken ban too gay. Lars or 8 Bhe may she don’ n; whe vants yo vant dumbbell men, like Ole, Peter, shelk-guy yust like you, who got no work at all to do, except to yingle vords all day, and den go d hit das hay nd ax, and men yot bunch of dumbbell hicks, be pen lke you, by yin ven; Ay know de years, by dam gud all, scout. # who tanks dat lumbersacks, avings das miner picks ban yust big wo dey don’ know how to sling a who vork like hell med Hulda may be nice and sveet, but she ban crazy med das it, 1f whe ban say akiddoo to men like Ole, Peter, dey vorked med me in lumber camp for #; and It ban gospel ven Ay shout dat every von ban Lars and Vell, Ay skall not eay any more, for it might make Miss Hulda nore; but Ay yust cou yay amp by his door, sving en ax or pick hick! da, don’ say who works till back ban Jame and sore, rf vonce again dat Ole, Pet 1 yust big bunch of dumbbell hicks, or you and Ay ban t help but my a friendly vord for every so volf skall not ban yust so gude as writer ter, Lars or gon to mix—and yen Ay do, Ay bet my roll, Ay sure skall knock you for en (. &8—F big bluff, yc Hulda—Sh-heh! Ay si . Hulda, don’ be mad med me, for Ay ban great y yust vant have forme fun med you; and, SVEN SVENSSON (3. H. | | | | } Chatrman Johnson feels opti. mintio over tho pusmnge of the 5) bil as @ caretul census shown him a big majority in favor of ried restriction of immigration Other members feel less hopetul &nd point out thut a deadlock 14 not at wll imposstble, If this occurs, the old quota taw wifi merely be extended another year or two, with all {te attendant hardships and annoyances, By no ponsible chance ean the big employers of labor put over @ law enabling them to throw down the barn to Europe, ‘That day seomn gone forever. Potential Presidents Another of a Series of In- formal Sketches of Men Who'd Like White House Job NEWTON D. BAKER — Lawyer, born Martinsburg, W. Va. December 3, 1871. City solicitor of Cleveland, Ohio, 1902-12, Mayor of Cleveland, | 1912-14, 1914-16. Appointed secretary ft by Woodrow Wilson, March . 1916, Served until March 4, 1921, mimissioned colonel in reserve corps the same month. Now prac- ticing in Cleveland. Frieda’s Follies There are mopds when rece driving Appeals to me, This man was a friend No car was safe, with him at the wheel. That is why I drive with me, Our drive was uninterrupted for miles, With the exception of the post office, Where I. mailed an important invited him to | letter. | ««*for Christmas ! oJ CHOCOLATES Seal of Friendship 3-pound box of Thomsen's Seal o2 Friendship Chocolates and seven one-pound boxes of Thomsen’s Chocolates Don’t think you haven’t a chance—try! You never can tell. Mail or bring your collection of wrappers on or before December 22 to the Pacific Coast Biscuit Co.’s plant, 1205 6th Ave. South, Seattle. Be sure and write your full name and address and be sure the name on the bar wrapper is spelled “THOMSEN’S.” Dealers sell them. Ask for the following Thomsen’s Bars by name: Wireless Comet Walnut Crush Full Meal Almond Caramel He fussed about it before’ and after, The accident, Until I explained I was worrled and hard up, And the letter contained the premium on My accident policy. Free Candy BOYS & GIRLS ONLY We are giving away to the ten boys or girls sending us the greatest number of Thomsen’s Bar wrappers before December 22, 1923, the following dandy prizes: Se Seal of Friendship Seal of Friendship 10-pound box of Thomsen’s Seal of Friendship Chocolates §-pound box of Thomsen’s Seal of Friendship Chocolates Choc. Crumble Choc. Peanut Little Bobby Square Meal Chocolate Eclairs Pacific Coast Biscuit Company Makers of Thomsen’s Candies “Bakers of Snow Flakes”