The Seattle Star Newspaper, April 21, 1920, Page 6

ma se per month, $4 per year, By carri g ae “Batter Up” “Play ball!” lows it means something to those University American game, a game which will open what appears to) coined it acs, are an auspicious season in Seattle today. Mt e- abe The ball game provides a thrill that nothing else will. THE FUGITIVE BOT The fellow who stands up in the stands where all may see ell Say Bo: T ha and hear, and cries out: “Paste him in the ivory, Bucky,” isn’t crazy. Far from it. He's “talkin’ to 'em,” just like the crap shooter does when he says: “Come on, you little Joe. Baby needs new shoes.” The baseball fan is come into his innings. At heart he | ,, is the same whether he is one of thousands that throng the stands tier upon tier, or whether he is sitting cross- legged, tailor fashion, along the first or third base line in ° some country hamlet where the usual thrill is no greater than that supplied by going to the postoffice for the even- ing mail. He is the guy who wants to see Bucky paste the pill so far that it lands in the centerfield bleachers OF pyier Piouring milla There. the hits Brown's cow pasturing far away in yon meadow. Katte Feld Get of the das Gua With two out, a man on third and “two and three” on Underneath the building. You might the batter and one run needed to win, baseball provides a C™*™\ Under and see if you can find thrill beyond which it is hard to conceive one greater. ‘ ipa beady “Play ball!” If someone wil loan ue the price of a suit of overulls we'll join the club. 1 Seattle in 106 And the And all that fol-|« the great" That means something. a cith who follow adium plaq the birds who there, lease advise Henry: Sorry, Our ouija yes on to say that a hog rooting in swamp earthed the bottle, Seattle. In foe, the bh box car ending When he returned It had been filled with «rain and moved to the a running hurled the box car was gone A North Carolina college asked its students why man- Pe ee . $ . : ners grow worse as one travels from Asia west. The pe aetias on gested b+ tyes pe answer is that expediency dictates manners as it does |, ie W. M, “Me thet about the wtateoraft. t je bill ts ed the trous too.” || What has become of the old-tash: Humor toned drug store that used to sell drugs? From such an authority as Ellis Parker Butler, who| “Hoover is sweeping California,” ears ago made the nation laugh over the humorous -—* had A. delegate from that ity, “Pigs is Pigs,” one is informed that there are retin p tcoaed aay means he's 10 kinds of humor. And he goes on to tell about. it. iw lis says one can get just as big a laugh by poking the BACK SEAT FOR JOHNNY CLEM by in the ribs as he can by composing the finest line A few friendd and relatives rath the world. Says he: ; jered at the home of William G. Win “The first method of humor is a breezy exaggeration, Ree. alae te On the Issue of 4 Jmericanism There Can Be No Compromise BY Di. FRANK (Copyright, 1920, by I am it, I am the principal thing in the world. | I am the spiritual center of the universe. I am the geographical center, for as Proc- tor Knott obser _ wherever I stand the horizon is equally distant in all directions. What's all this talk about the end of the world? When I die, that’s the end of the world. It ceases to exist then, for me, just the same as if a comet had hit it. Yes, 1 heard what you said about the ‘Church, and the Nation, and the Grand | Old Party, and about the University and | |'the Club and the other Institutions. 1} stand among all Institutions as a Himalaya peak among the foot-hills. For I am a Human Being. Beside me the stars are as dust. Heaven is my throne and the earth is my footstool. For I am my Father's son. I am greater than all laws, for they | were made for me, not I for them. Before me the lion and the tiger flee into the wilderness, the ox bows his neck to my | yoke, the horse takes my bit and turns | at my gesture, steam roars in my service, the lightning flashes to obey my thought, and, as I pass, the valleys are exalted and | the mountains are laid low. ; Build your navies and drill your armies, hand, ‘They might, however,” be caused by a number of other cond tlona iene } Q. Does sleeping make people fat, | and how can fat people get thin? A. Lack of exercine is one of the causes of obesity, but usually there | are other factors. ‘The regulation of | Hood’s | Sarsaparilla Makes Food rane) but at last they shall obey Me. Your Senates may debate and your diplomats plot, the Kings of the earth may set themselves and the rulers take counsel together, but at last they must come to Me, for I have my way with them. Constitutions were made for Me, and I j unmake them. ] I] snap traditions. I bend precedents, I] formed customs, and I dissolve them. a 1 exist for God, and God also exists for 7 me. I am His servant, and He also is mine, I inform the universe. 3irds fly that I may witness their graceful curves. Flowers bloom to delight me. Sunsets glow for me,- And for me the dawn blushes. For me t / grass greens. For me the sheep and king {| are sacrificed. For me the Earth Mother eternally ples her loom, weaving life upward, and death downward, For me the mighty mysteries, wars, ti lence, tornadoes, the sea and the earthqualg each has its message. I understand baw dimly. i To me Death forever whispers its great secret. I do not comprehend yet, for I am a child. Some day I shall know. 4 I am the humblest of God’s creatures, — for I am nearest to God, and God is humbler than anything that He has made. _|{ Clever Clothes on Credit CHERRY CHAT So clever are Chew: | i ry’s new spring styles —s0 convenient the ne, Sr, of Forest place, on Wednes. day evening in honor of his 18th the Mark Twain style, which predominates with the birthday. Mr. Winne i a civil war Yankees. : “The second is founded on a person’s real or feigned e. Almost all child humor is founded upon the 's ignorance of something we fully understand, | “Third, there is the naive mode which Barrie so gener- ly employs in his Scotch stories. “Fourth, there. is the ridiculous, calling direct attention something we consider impossible with ourselves—the j veteran, having served in the army and In the navy on the U. 8. 8. Ow sippe.—-Rockville Center (N. Y) Ob server. | see | “At what age am I free to do aa T please?” a 17-yearold girl anks. Our own guess ts from one day up to about four months old and from §9 to 90 years of age to the finish. And we're not any too certain about Ue the diet is usually very important, fats, sugars and starches being en | pecially productive of fatnens, The treatment of obenity ix not a simple matter, and it i# usually wine to have it outlined and supervined by a com petent phynician Taste Cood Creates an appetite, aids diges-| tion, purifies the blood, promotes assimilation so as to secure full nutritive valne of food, and to Give strength to the whole system. Nearly 50 years’ phenomenal ra > “UNCLE SAM, M. D..” will amewer, either im thie colume or by mall, Questions of grmeral interest relating prevention of disemse, It will be complete array—not only , that is new in women's apparel, everything that is correct in latter part of our guess. eee } fat man in a silk hat on a slippery pavement, for instance. Ovnducted Under Direction of Dr. Rupert IMue, U. 8. Public Health Serve BO-PEEP IN A NEW ROLE for him to answer quee- purely perewmal nature, or for individual diseasm. sales tel] the story of the remarks- ble merit and success of Hood's wear as well—not to forget clathep for the little chaps. “Fifth, the repetition of something more or less un- like ‘Pigs is Pigs.’ “Sixth, the sudden let down from the extremely serious o extremely frivolous. “Seventh, the use of extreme analogy, mostly used by onists. | “Eighth, the more or less disguised practical joke prac- i perscpelly in stage comedies, such as the custard pie face. “Ninth, the gradual expansion of anything that has possibilities: “And lastly, untimeliness, something that has no particu- humor in itself, happening at an inopportune time. ample, things happening at a funeral, wedding or any For) A New York manicure whe hae brought a $100,000 breach of promise sult against a millionaire, says he |used to call her up by telephone a dozen times a day. Greater love hath no man than this, that he will use the telephone a doxen times a day. oe 8, ON HIS WAY, SO TO SPEAK | Mra J. O. Way and family of Valley | Junetion, Mra. J. C. Way of Hirming- home. D. R Way has left for Kansas on account of his health —Fairfield Ja) Journal eee Mrs. Ed Krum of Mt Pieasant,| ham are guests at the D, Ro Way| 4 hard business applied to health. Doesn't personal ‘The newspapers are printing pio- tures of the English woman who has |come to this country proclaiming she %& the homeliest woman in the |world. Not that we know anything about it and are looking for easy money, but we'll bet 10 to 1 the pic jtures were taken early in the morn | ing. | cee Carpentier’s manager speaks little) || English and not very good English | | at that. The difference between him | Health in Business and the American prizefight man-/ A business man walked into a doctor's office the other oe » pia the latter speak @ lot) day. He looked in the pink of condition. of Engtie “J want a thoro physical examination,” he. said. Per ; me The doctor accommodated him. Heart was sound, lungs (reer oe cxtenston.” jeceasity is the rious gathering.” Bring on any brands of humor you possess! Let's zsman Fess’ condemns the “socialism” of Wil- son. If Mr. Fess likes the caste system, he will find it in Europe. , eee | But, as the tustomer remarked to Besides utilizing sheep as a source of food and clothing, ntudies of the United States Pubilec | ¢ Health Service appear to indi their value as sanitary agents. T! | which carry Rocky mountain spotted | fever, become entangled on theb long, greasy wool and die. This povents the spread of the disease. So far an it in known this is the only diseane which is peculiar to the) United States, It is conveyed to) man by the bite of a wood tick| | which buries its head beneath the skin of ita victim and thus intro- duces the virus which causes Uck fever On the west side of the Bitter Root valley in Montana the disease is un usually severe, | The United States Public Health Service rented a band of sheep and pastured them im that part of the Bitter Root valley which hitherto | sind bad the mout cases, | It was found that they collected large numbers of ticks and these, be coming entangled in the wool, died. | The sheep were caretully dipped avery 19 days to kill the remaining ticks, and so successfully did they 4o the work that not a single case has orcurred in that area since the sheep began their sanitary campaign. ANSWERED Q. What is the cause of swotlen | glands under the léft arm? healthy, kidneys and all the other organs function-| — y- } : “You're the most splendid specimen I’ve seen in a long time,” said the doctor. _ “Thanks; I intend to remain so,” said the elient. “You will go over me like this every six months. And I propose to have every man in a responsible position in my organiza- ‘tion undergo a similar examination twice a year. “A competing firm recently put a man into an important ob who looked as well as I. He broke down, and in the # ° ‘demoralization of the firm’s business that came with his ; breaking, our firm has taken over some of their biggest and best accounts. A condition of 20 years’ standing, which he thought completely overcome, caused that man’s - breakdown. “I don’t propose that my firm shall suffer thru any such, rience.” | ' interest recommend to every man such prudence? | Many mien can you recall who have discovered a serious state of health too late to mend? - At that, a resolution declaring the war at an end will be nearer the truth than a declaration of peace. Wonder Why are men who wonder why. | ; "Twas a falling apple taught Newton the way God holds the universe together. A twisted paper windmill, spinning in the steam jet of a tea kettle, showed a way to a new power-world to the boy Watt. - James Bradley, barely 26 years old, held school for the wisest astronomers and taught them a new and better way ‘to measure star distances. That was because he saw a _ weathercock and tried to understand why it appeared to! Frames different quarters as he rowed past it on the | : ‘ou’vé heard the water grow! and cough as it flows, in| i I from your bathtub in the morning. You never} ok the trouble to look at this tiny maelstrom. Hiram laxim did and noticed that with the vent wide open in the) tom of the tub, the water flowed slowly. Within three! he had solved a problem that had puzzled since the! bullet left the muzzle of a flintlock and had invented | Maxim gun silencer. | Edison wondered why a sharp point fixed to the back " of a square of thin iron pricked his finger when he talked| ' the other surface. His wonderings gave birth to| Resources Puget Sound @ reasonably safe wager shat yo couldn’t write t nt essay on the workings he phonograph, the fall of dew or the phases of the moon today. Onen your eves and wonder why. What's Your Dollar Worth? CCORDI standards it is generally con- ceded to be worth only about fifty cents—but there can be no reasonable doubt that it’s value will increase in the future And you can cash in on it's future value by the simple plan of leaving it with this strong Savings Association where it will enjoy absolute safety and at the same time earn a substantial divi dend return NG to pre-war Now Over Four Million Dollars Javings and Loan Association. Where Pike Street Crosses Third HOURS —9amwS pm ‘Cio Largost Mutual Savings and’ Loon Aaociation in he State of Washington | | the careful would indicate in the majority of Swollen glands under the arm! Sarsaparilla. It is just the medi- cine you need this season, INFORMATION Eprron, . & Pablie Menith ery Washington, Bidg.. n infection of the arm or! Cherry's Style Shop, 207 Risiip over Pig'n Whistle. on Sad ave. between Madison and Spring. Christian Democracy f Not to reach down—Not to push down—Not to stifle any aspiration toward economic or social progress—But to spread among all men the spirit of Christ, that in the ebb and flow of civilization’s progress every advance may be wrought out in Christian Brotherhood. This is the motive behind the Christian Americanization pro of Northern Baptists. This is the motive That we may extend the spirit of friendliness, helpfulness, and brotherly .confidence to the multitudes of strangers within our gates. That we may demonstrate to them the nobler Spirit of America. That we may help them to find thetr better selves in the new land of their choice, and to become the Americans they aspire to be. That we may assist them in acquiring the language of their new neighbors. That we may protect them from the forces of vice and greed that are seeking to prey upon them. That we may introduce Jesus to them as their elder brother and friend of all. mankind. #100,000,000~Apr25-May2 For this purpose and for work akin to it at home and over seas the Northern Baptists begin a campaign on April 25th to raise $100,000,000. * Quicken | STR