The Seattle Star Newspaper, April 12, 1919, Page 6

THE SEATTLE STAR—SATURDAY, The Seattle Star AL, out of city, 60e per month; 3 months, : & months $2.78; year, $6.00, in the | | © of Washingto te, | | per month, $4.50 fi per year, Ry carrier, city, t8e The Unspoken Lie | THis ¥628 INDIGO * Huo, Sweerie | THs 15 Cofee. | LISTER, SWEETIE = I'M Gore | To HAVE Pinmee, DOWN Tow \ Tom Thumbs and Goliaths An eight-year-old girl six feet tall!—Myrtle Margold “Maybank, Tex. She has that rarest of diseases Her growth can be checked only by a delicate operation HIS EVENING. You S€ pving the pituitary gland, attached to the brain, It tiny gland that determines your height and weight. it become diseased, the body may grow a foot a me > Will future scientists discover how to manipulate the ti gland at will, so that our descendants can be tall ‘short as they please? Not a wild theory, say the doc- in view of recent sensational discoveries concerning he effect on man’s stature of hormones, chemical extrac- ions from the pituitary glands of animals. _ M. Henrion estimated that Eve was 118 feet 9 inches (Wf Adam was like us, he had to climb 10 flights of to kiss her. Other scientists disagree—claim that man has always his present size. Thank man’s pituitary gland for Century after century it remains normal. Diseases dwarf or giant is the lone exception in millions. — cities have statues of legendary giant in-; ts of the past. In Douai, one of Gayant, reputed 22 feet in his socks. Antwerp had Mr. Antigonus, ‘ tall. London has effigies in the Guildhall, of Gog Magog, 14-foot giants who once terrorized the south- coast. ll these are mythical. tallest man in history about whom we have re- was Machnow, a nine-foot-three Russian from , who exhibited in London in 1905. Machnow had wrong with his architecture. His hands two feet from wrist to tip of index finger. operation on his brain in childhood would have him normal. ‘The smallest man in authentic history was Philetas, in- valet of Ptolmy Philadelphus, Egyptian king. So Philetas, according to historians of his day, that to wear great leaden shoes to keep the wind from * ae / him away. Maybe the historians had a sense of ? See vane NOw, For. HEAVEN s SAKE, Don'T LIE To mE! Know YOURE GOING To OSCAR MctneryRre' > To PLAY POKer | Dont’ T HAMO ME THAT OLD One | ABouT A CusTomeR. FROM | DENVER BLOWING try t ( \ \F You STAY DOWN Towr: | To MIGHT You Lt BE Sorey- / THAT 5S ALL ' Binge! | (Hanes uP Receiwee ) ly 18 inches tall was Jeffery Hudson, son of a huge at Oakham, Rutlandshire, England. At a dinner to Charles I this midget was served in a pie. Adopted king, he lived down his size—became known as Jeffery,” was a captain of cavalry and fought 16 duels. Little men, walk proudly, these were men suffering from diseases of gland in the brain. mates appear to affect the gland. Scotchmen aver-) w than any other race. Above all, the Japanese) sensitive about their short stature. Medical | may correct. this in time—turn them into a race derful is the body—you realize it when’ you ponder -@ gland small as a cherry determines your height and the THE MELANCHOLY MUSK } First the sun shines and then it tains And then the wind blows and stops and blows again And the little «pring clouds dash madly ut All calculated to get me excited and everything But no; I will philosephize calmly When baby is to have his picture taken in his little P % sol Gd whole block knows all about it. The windows are|*{ns amemonuy. faces as mother and sister carry baby | One glass if it i soft and ten if it Is hard toward the photograph gallery, waving There is no use getting wrought up, c; 1 everyone and smiling happily at the cop on|isprcis!ly over (he weathers “the corner and at the rotund proprietor of the delicatessen wiessunaier at sane ta Mia nal x Sarge" it nine or ten youngsters of his own and neatly tacked to the wall of his We venture to predict that the reason the Siberian le strudels. [ope gear rong romagee sd preventing the immigra- at the Lage ry ay = ay, ee rey vortok and vicinity, is because they feared Leon by greatly annoys a flint |. age e le, who en was coming back unknown, mysterious reason, is having her face} “ d in sepia. At this the photographer becomes} wyiem rrain Nervous and rushes to the infant with all the loose |* mins'y ster father come pom Be nalia in the shop—a large brass watch, a plate) ‘eri , @ tin whistle and an alarm clock. After a few!“ wails, as baby realizes what he is up against, protests will get him nothing, he becomes quiet. EXTREME CURIOSITY 4 on bie eweetheart Friday night, tage ey sweh Pollee ¢ 1 not which hung on the hail tree, and the hat seems to be having a good time trying to insert "202.4" two pieces 1 grobeed ‘tins’ We, the eens amd the cnet parted ing a half of it and into his mouth. the female vanishes. Mother takes baby in her| and, after divesting him of his meagre clothing,| him in the tiny tin tub provided for the purpose by photographer. She then drops to her knees beside the| rests her hand on her knee with a faraway, pensive) n, and, after tickling baby to make him smile, him, and I pounced upen hi trousers, but ae A peeled 0 Dis and ty don't koow what was the matter with ee fever, 1 guess, I wouldn't have h to see who he was"—-Omaha (Neb. YOU SAID IT, JUSTICE stealing & handbag ied down the steps, 1 the boy, Just buck wanted t him, owe 18 BLIND 1 Suse i United States to Viadi- | «7 . my ‘ that she is ready. Russell Potter, of or : Waynesboro, Md., has containing one cent from » “Hold it steady,” agitatedly exclaims the photographer, | pen sentenced to verve | Gladys Roalef, a sentence of | ng around excitedly. wix to eight | three and a half years was To everyone’s surprise, mother and baby remain abso- in prison for | imposed upon Joseph Kar killing his young wife. sap, New York. And often we are inclined to the opinion that the godess is deaf and dumb, too, eee still until the process is completed. | i he picture proves to be a big success, i ' “Baby at the Bath” is cherished for years as a family irloom, causing untold anguish to “baby” as he grows manhood. | lly it is giggled over by his best girl. | " Then he tears it to shreds, despite the wailings and| tions of his family. “Baby at his Bath” will trouble “baby” no more. The Huns destroyed French coal mines, and yet statesmen are holding back peace because they are afraid the Hun’s feelings might be hurt if France took over the coal fields of the Saar valley. Four years ago Mrs. Grace Nairin Grant, of Chi 1g0, an Baster bride, enunciated the following “doc n¢ of matrimony:” “S wedding ring is a relic of barbariem and should not be worn, “A wife should accept no money from her husband except that actually needed to defray household expenses, “Money for her clothing, for amusements, and for luxuries, should be earned by the wife her- self. larriage should never be a spoony honey- moon. eS nen | The other day Mrs. Grant sued her husband in e United Si e +s . P the court at Washington, D, C., asking for separate The U States food administration grain cor-. | maintenance, charging her husband with cruelty, poration promises to do everything in its power to re- duce the price of flour, and that is our idea of zero in the way of a promise. desertion and failure to provide. see HOW NOT TO AMUSE YOUR WIFE Mrs. Ella M. Kellar, of Baltimore, Md., told on the witness stand how her husband came home one day after being out all night, took off bis shoes and began playing with his toes. Mrs, Kellar was dramatic in the recital, telling how her husband lay down on the sofa and whiled away the morning hours tickling his |pedal extremities, : A Tennessee manufacturing concern has been in- dicted for skinning Uncle Sam. The fact that a sport is popular and universal doesn’t keep it from being dangerous. It’s a whole lot better to expect the w P peg cheerful preparations to meet it than to forbid poe ager | bid lain lb be ty ae daar 7 r* na 4 the vad ; 4 o t use a hobnatled shoe,” advised Judge Miem- head in the clouds until something hits you in the neck. | ine, Kansas City, who fining David’ Thurmann ~ $50 for spanking his wife with that sort of a shoe. The judge didn't say what kind of a spanker would bo considered legal in his jurisdiction It takes some women a long time to find out that they don’t like their husbands Wilson has announced that American troops can't be used in eastern or southeastern Europe. They couldn’t be used at Archangel, but they were. Chicago has voted “wet” by a sweeping majority. : ‘ t Mrs. Carrie Colbrandt, of San Francisco, Cal., Somebody give Chicago a pinch. filed suit for divorce against Richard Colbrandt, after - being married to him 40 years. If the league at Geneva is to bea Swiss watch on se ivtad 4 the Rhine, won't the Huns tamper with the works? | OH, 386 (SRY, TRLNG YOUR WiEe Gime : | i PLD! a Politics is rutty, says Dr. Frank Crane. Also Doctor—Tell your wife not to worry about her P tt deafness, as it is merely an indication of advancing rotty. years. Mr, Meekhub—Er--would you mind telling her Whadda mean, “peace” conference? yourself? 0. B. JOYFUL. | And I kep’ amentionin’ APRIL 12, 1919. Kin OLY Omer THAT SweEne Sure! THis 15 A Fee Time >-—} “ | To Phone me ! Sox TeneTy Ano ‘cee | Din MeR HAS BEEN READY For. | MALE Art Hom. q — ( Hs 19 THE SECONO Tine | THs WEE Youve Leer ME ALL ALome ! You RE JUST REEKING Wily { CONSIDERATION FoR ME . CNER THING ALL RIGHT, HEY? THa’s TH Kin OF A wire “TO | wave! You're A LucKY STIFF. | We, LES Go! -—— - —_ | WONDER IF ARTY | ROCHE An BLL | Tonriovor wice | BF THERE brea By Webster. |/ | | | league, “however (Copyright, —$—$—_—— Leave me alone! 1 have no part nor lot with you. I do not share your labors nor your games. I sit not at your feasts. | have no concern with your politics. I am among you, but not of you. I am your judge. You may seek fame in battles or in state- craft, by living sumptuously or by bestow- ing princely gifts to charity. You shall die the dog’s death, unremembered, unless I hold out to you my royal sceptre. For I alone give lasting fame. The only tangible immortality is in books. I write them. I can exalt you for all time, or con- sign you to the limbo of oblivion. No mausoleum can immortalize you my pen. I go among you as a stranger, yet I am more intimate than your nearest com- panion. as 1 am the confidant of the multitude, and I whisper to millions, | Myriads who, have not seen me love me. la 1 am the former of souls, the bread of saints, the temptation of the weak, the I wine of youth, the consolation of the aged, the medicine to the sick. The League of Nations BY N. D. COC BY N. D. COCHRAN | touched their personal honor before, nor uncircumeision, barbarian, Soy- Much of the argument for and| Courts of law were established, in| thian, bond nor free; but Christ ie 7 against the League of Nations|®Sserts that we must be free to car-| all and in all.”” ry our superior American ctviliza-| In connection with what Bishop kn of partiaan politics, because of the public speeches are be ing made by men identified with one or the other of the two old political parties; and also, because republican United States sen » Rought to make Of it a p al inene am) most bor-nations without publics—that in, ‘nettle and develop’ True, ex-President Taft, hie broth or Hanes We Taft, former United | Pavently for her to solve the prob- Sater enaior ‘Theodore, Burton,|'4im# of ber own democratic aspire a her prominent republicans, b: Dns, to le , ieceast at 5 Porencg individual or nation + advocacy of the league, have ¢ subir ob thie attempt Wer own blunders—to deal for her self with her. intolerable y make it a partisan ineue. And Sef with her intoles Henator Reed of Missouri, by oppos- | Concessions to | foreign ng the league, has helped a little in « direction. didions determination’ There in ptr support of the rom quarters pot however, from quarters not Charles D. Williams of Michigan ts net a politician He in one of the most prominent of the forward-look ing men in the clerical field. Speak ing of the League of Nations re cently, and calling it “the supreme international problem,” Bishop Wi) ague, can corporations) “All this sounds have a Divine call AGAINST DAYLAGHY PLAN Tums asked how the chureh will #at-| pontik’ — ‘weltpolitik Editor The Star! I must say, If ever any PErPON! iney this consuming paewion in the | macht” brought out the truthful facts in th ' hearts of the war-weary peoples in they made, A. N. Moores certainly 4 every land.” and said. regarding thie daylight saving pie | “We are confronted today by a | conquest. I's the greatest injustice that ever Was PUL OF) Lome origin of opportunity. One right. We tear off he farmers to bear 1 would add to whats has already thin subject Nght saving plan farm life whatever? Do they know that the farmer and hin wife have to get up about 4 o'clock in the morning? And no man, woman, nor child can go tred th 5 they can get that hour 0 necessarily requires. We must remember that in cheated of an hour of sleep, our heart more than by any of rest which every that the bedy then starts out on the new day's work | nity to submit touches our national honor to any | phatically was and is the mind of we cannot! other arbitrament than that of our! the church's Founder and Head. His declared: that neither Greek nor Jew, circumcision line laid down by that below the normal reconstruction Nature, And it's needless to say accomplish the amount of work that we could if we] own strong arm. bad that hour of rest. The dairy industry, with ite long hours and incessant labor, becomes pretty palling at times, the way it is, without losing that hour of rest so early io the morning. ELSIE GOEBEL, Tono, Wash. BY EDMUND VANCE COOKE Gittin’ Along (Text: “I” is only one letter of the alphabet) Says he, “How de do? I'm makin’ it fine I'm a-cuttin’ some swathe, I'm aputting on shine. I'm a landin' a whopper on every line!” Says I, “How are you? I'm your real Uncle Dud I'm amiikin’ the cow while she's chewin' her oud; I'm adriving’ the big car and splashin' the mud!” “I'm a sayin',—" ways he, and says I “Lemme tell—,” So I kep’ tellin’ him what IT done; And he kep’ ashootin’ off his big gun, And we didn’t git along very well Saye I, “My children look best to me; They're the beatinest kids you ever see; And they got most other skinned A to Z.” Saye he, “Well, mine are agittin’ ahead. And the other night when they went to bed ‘Well, just lemme tell! you what Lemuel said.” “f was sayin’,” says I, and says he, “Lemme tell So-he kep’ abuzzin’ abayt his kid, hat mine did, And we didn’t get along very well. Says he, “I’m a man misunderstood; Folks have tried to guess me, but not one could; I'm @ Still Deep Stream, I'm a Great Dark Wood.” Says I, “I'm the Spirit of Sacrifice; I toil all alone and I pay The Price; I'm a Torrid Meat in a World of 1 “| was sayin’, says I, and says he, “Lemme tell And he kep’ atellin’ of his great acts, And I kep' a-mentionin’ simple facts, And we didn't get along very well Says 1, “You're the best old friend 1 got; 1 depend on you a most turrible tot; For you're true all thru, without one weak Says he, “I been lookin’ this world around And of all the fellers that I have found, I'm wbackin’ your qualities pound for pound,” And says he, “Say on!" and says 1, “Do tell! So I kep’ a-bootin’ him on, and he He turned right around and he boosted me. And then we got along very well! (Tag:—Any fool can talk, It takes a wise to listen.) (Copyright, 19 spot.” Butter was originally spread on bread thumb. Nowadays thumbs are test the temperature of soup, not always forward with the more often used to ‘The world moves, but been ,xaid on} Do the parties that brought this 449°), return to ancient and Intolerable into action know anything about| conditions [arrayed abroad the to #leep in the hot summer evening, no matter how| certain blatant But early in the morning, when {t'*| jealousy and blind partimnship. their| spiring both oppositions, at land abroad, is the spirit of narrow | were an international church, It maske | and indivisible, uneplit by divisions | glenominational, time our body! and militant nationaliam. we are overworking | itself as ‘stalwart Americani«m.’ hard physica! labor;| declares that it is beneath our dig-| would be the chief exponent of the | | path leads toward the realization of the hope of the world—the other t# familiar fd@utures of Against the league are | outwardly and been old habits of her spirit inwardly. ‘balance of power and secret di. | plomacy. voices of personal | home |an international It} national and any question that international mind. (So thought the | great questions apostle about hawk and ‘epi d h te foul, digest Tight, sour stomach, bow: atipated, pains in the back, loins, ringing in the e feel erally rotten, It le working through your syst: of the many complicat: uu need @ reliable ta PE-RU-NA it risen and in: Tl, Wagner of Bkate, Ky. “P. 2 success with ait and youn tonics.” ty fo the best of all Liquid. § Seld Everywhere. In order to introduce our new (whalebone) plate, which and strongest plate known, covers very little of the root teed 15 years, All_ work guaranteed for 15 years. morn id get teeth same day. atts eal can implies of Oo Examination a: it Most of our present le y patients, whose work im still Mt patients who have tested our work \ Bring this you are in the right piace, Open Sundays From © te 1 The Writer By DR. FRANK CRANE 1919, oy rank Crane) Public Opinion. palace and hut. millenium, I lay the stones for the Gol City. w you who laughs at death. }tion and system to backward neigh: | |drance by possible vetoes of Euro-| pean powers or South American re to be specific, means plainly that, w in the only way an and her impossible land-tenure con without giving her this ‘self for which we osten sibly fought this great war—we will | — step in and by foree exploit her tre- mendous resources for our Ameri: | kultur upon leas developed peoples. | We have a holy mission to dominate) the world’s trade and finance. “We are talking in terms of ‘real-) “We have caught by contagion the fever of militarism and the lust for For us, might becomes | ‘stalwart Americanism,’ and jo! the iam. We have conquered Germany | “What is the plain mission of the Against it at home ery | church in this supreme crisis? “If there is to be any ‘internation- | entire satisfaction when treating ecze- In-|al league), there must be behind it) ‘ ‘ porey ma, nettle rash, ringworm, itch, pimples, brain not clear and h. Thi you can bite corn off the cob; guaran | nd advice fi Werk, We ¢ Werking Pee: On the Issue of Americanism There Can Be No Compromise 1 am good and bad, light and darkness, Ormuzd and Ahriman, guardian angel and insinuating devil, Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. I teach, more than all schoolmasters. I preach, more than all the clergy. make laws, more than all lawyer rule, more than all rulers. incite, more than all agitators. get votes, more than all politicians. make and unmake reputations, am the Warwick of all kings. I am privy counsellor to His Majesty, I know no class, no bounds, for I go to I am the high priest of humanity. I am the secret of progress, I build theg I make wars and bring peace. 1 outlive cathedrals. When your cities shall have disappeared shall remain. : I shall live longer than your institutions, . customs, All flesh is grass. You shall all die. But all not die. I am the only one among Iam THE WRITER. HRAN Williams says about Mexico, it is in- teresting to note that among the | leading newspapers vigorously op- posing the League of Nations are ~ the Hearst papers and the Chicago” | Tribune, which demanded vigorously | —just before we entered the world war—that the United States send | into Mexico an art of occupation of 500,000 American soldiers to pac ify and pollee Mexico. let or hin to Mexico—which ithout waiting can learn, by [WIVES OF MEN fh ‘exec syndicates’ familiar, W to impose our| ond = ‘welt-/ Look carefully at that jar and carton of Resinol Ointment. Remember what it looks like when you ask for it at your — | druggist’s. Insist upon getting the — ‘real Resinol—not something claimed | |to be just as good. If other treatments _ | have proved a waste of time and money, — ‘Resinol seldom, if ever, fails to give “Wm the mask of | Pan-American. conquered by Ie there | dandruff, chafings, bums, and other | n° | eruptions and abrasions of the skin, it For that em.) ‘There is Atail druggists. For free trial write. Ressmal, : o-cide The Medco Company, Dayton, Ohie. REV. M.A. fe MATTHEWS fae will preach a sermon Sunday morning entitled, purifies mucous THE UNAVOIDABLE CUP In the evening he will discuss the subject, RELEASING THE PRISONER the lightest of the mouth; | Programs of SPECIAL MUSIC A Welcome for All, FIRST taken in the! ir our eure | OHIO CUT-RATE DENTISTS ogy UNIVERSITY oT, Oppeaite Vrases-Fatersen Cn