The Seattle Star Newspaper, July 23, 1912, Page 4

_ PHE SEATTLE STAR Pron Exchange Matn 9400. NONTHWHST LEAGUR OF NEWSPATINS ing fall teaged wire mews service of the Uni oar at Seat , postottios Sut of ity, #86 per mon. up to six mow) six in liy by The Siar Publishing Oe, HE DID. Tommy came out of a room where his father was tacking down a carpet. He was crying lustily. “Why, Tommy, what's the matter?” asked his mother, “Bep-p-papa hit his finger with the hammer,” sobbed ‘omm)y “Well, you needn't cry about a thing like that,” com- forted his mother. “Why didn’t you laugh?” “I did,” sobbed Tommy. The courage born of adversity, the heroism that hides itself often in a smile, the determination not to be downed by the foulest blow fate can deliver, the waking up to the fact that there is a spark of God in us that is superior to any circumstances— these are the worth while things adversity sometimes forms a ~ background for, and the man or woman who develops under these conditions is so apt to go away ahead of the easy-guing ones who haven't had to suffer that people get the idea, his. mis fortunes, and not himself, are the cause. Don't believe it, be- cause it makes the people who do believe it careless about creat- ing misfortunes for redemption of their fellows, and careless about relieving such suffering as they know about and could telieve. To all of us, sometime, must come tribulation, and when the inner man responds right to the treatment, we get glimpses of what man is meant to he. Henley wrote “Captain of My Soul” and a lot more of those simple little things, full of such spt courage and hope and purpose, from a hospital cot and depths of poverty, because evil had no dominion over him ity is evil but it is the duty of a man never to surrender evil. There's a little verse from a little poem, “How Did You ?” that expresses it perfectly: “You are mauled to the earth? Come up with a smiling face, It's nothing against you to fall down fiat, But to Me there—that's disgrace. ‘The harder you're thrown, why, the higher you bounce; Be proud of your blackened eye; At isn’t the fact that you're licked that counts, But how did you fight, and why.” COMPARING himself to the great John Marshall, Hanford “Of course Marshall handed down some mighty fine stuff, T—" Wonder that that didn’t make Marshall turn over grave. i According to the veracious satire of Dean Swift, it seems ‘that one day two cats, urged on by a malevolent and violent © apirit, ate cach other up, leaving nothing but their tails. There | @ever has been a more exhaustive treatment of any subject, - amatomical or literary. _- We may ask ourselves how it was possible. There are phy- laws Penyio After they had eaten each other's teeth jat had either left to eat with? And how could each be stowed im the other's stomach at the same time? we must concede the possibility of the event atcept the historical accuracy of the account. But why go ee rrany when anyone may witness like incidents right o women fall out and resort to slander. Each produces p the public gaze all the frailties of the other; their acquaint- 4 es complacently accept what each one says, and in the end oth characters are annihilated. Exeunt Kilkenny cats! ee Two men go to law over something. They retain counsel, : tr complaints, subpoena witnesses, empanel juries, hear ver- make appeals, multiply costs. Adjournment after adjourn- vexation after vexation, business neglected, patience ex- ted, years wasted, and on both sides the last dollar spent. cats have interlocked their claws, clashed each other's teeth, each other's jaws, and gulped down each other's all mination is more complete than that at Kilkenny it is sad but true that all around us, in a thousand divinely gifted human beings are eating one another up. not always is so much as a caudal appendage left! Yi ——— ANYHOW, Hanford heid off until the Potlatch was over. D of revealing anything sacred when it was stirred 2 Up, Hanford’s record gave off an awiul smell THAT grating sound you hear comes from the fellows who endorsed Hanford’s record “unsight and unseen.” HERE'S hoping that the man who takes Hanford’s place On the bench here will be worthy of the confidence and re of the people. - HANFORD’S apologi Of “reasons” why he quit. tions. THE Hanford advisors who fooled a lot of respectable busi- Pol men into erittersing Hanford before the evidence ght out should be impeached WAS there anything sacred in the fact that Hanford re- duced the N. P. Co.'s taxes in King county by $45,000 while he was dickering with the company for the purchase of land? spect sts have now put forth 57 varieties The public didn’t need any explana- They know the reason vi was IN the front rank of the few Seattle attorneys who dared to pond Hanford and his crowd stood Attorne John H. Perry, tle and the whole nation owes Mr. Perry a vote of thanks THE only bad thing about it is that Taft gets a chance now Oe hea rc federal judge inthis district. If Hanford could ive held out until our next president is elected a lot of people would have felt better. ai: THE fact that the impeachment go ment against the recall of judges. It required mueh fighting, considerable money and FE -N MONTHS for the impeach ment weapon to cut Hanford off. The recall would have snap- ped him off in a month or two. t Hanford is no argu- | : “Does your son realize (he respon | sibilities of great wonlth?” | The Miss—That would depend) “I fear not. He can't seem to! entirely on the make, the acees-|learn the rudiments of auction sories and your appearance in auto| bridge, and he shows no sign of apparel. iwanting to marry a chorus girl.” | The Youth-—Would you love me it I had an automobile? EAGER TO HELP He—My dear Ming Gladys, [ have been converted, but I find there! are some things I must do. The minteter has told me, for instance, that where I have done wrong | m make restitution. She ‘mpathizingly)—Sometimes that cannot always be done, for} ministers ask hard thin, He (doubtfully)—Now, Misa Gladys, the other day I stole a kiss from you, and, according to the minister, | must give it back, She (promptly)—Well, | suppose you ought to do what the min ister tells you,—Baltimore American. . Rake ke teehee wae ee * 80 THEY TRUSTED HIM * MeGinnia kept & public house and lived with his family up- ® stairs, One day his barman shouted to him “Guv'nor, shall Tt trust Jim O'Leary for a drink tT’ “Has he had the drink? called back McGinnis, “He bas.” “Thin thrust bini.”—Tit-Bits. 7 * * * * * * a * * * * * * * RRRRRARRKRRHRKRHRHHEREHHERRHRKRRKRH IMPROVEMENT A young Brooklyn woman, who the bonor of being the strong est girl at her college, said the other day of an affected type of culture Such culture is superficial, It reminds me of Cornelius Husk “Corn Husk, after his son's graduation from college, gave the lad & trip to Kurope, Afterward a friend asked the old man Well, did the tour impreve young Corny” “It certainly did, was the reply, “He says “I fancy” for “T guess” now, and “blouse” for “shirt waist. boot for “aboos,” “nut” for “dude,” “bowler” for “derby,” and patch, THAT WOULD HE! f “Say, old man?” “What fe ft?” cena?” “L wish you would get your weight) “Goodness, yes. Why, ahe's gol down, if you are going to #it on my to marry a nobleman oa the alf bat.” jmony.” “Was Helen's marriage @ sue- WHY THEY WERE HAPPY Friend—Given up housekeeping and gone to a hotel, eh? You tke hotel life? “MeTift—First rate. Never was so happy in my life. Friend--Indeed! And bow does you wife like it? MeTiff—First claes, Friend—Where are you staying? MeTiff—i'm at the St. Charles and she's at the #. James.—New York Weekly. How do ee * * HIGH FINANCE UP TO DATE Grocer—-What are you doing there? Clerk-——Mr. Jones bas ordered a bushel of potatoes, and I'm * * *® looking bim up in Bradstreet.—Boston Transcript * oeeeeeee RRMA Re RRR TIME TO CALL A HALT “Pa.” inquired Willtam, “what is a burlesque?” “A. turlesque, son,” replied the father, “is a take-off.” “Take off what?” “Henry,” interrupted the mother, who had been Metening to the conversation, “if you are going to answer that question, I will lew the room.”-qJudge’s Library. ——“Toves Test a noua” SS ee = RAKKKHKN Kh hhh RATHER PARTICULAR ‘ «| “Now, sir,” asked the lawyer, é AT THE ORPHEUM *| “can you give me the tru 8 in * tk tk te tt ek tek tek bill at the Orpheum this this case?” The witness hesitated. “Well, sir, can't you answer?’ Week starts out good and keeps Frope better to the end. Burr and Give a pretty sketch, “A Lady, & Lover, and a Lamp.” Martin John- #on's travelogue is a pictorial record of the trip he and Jack London took im the “Snai in out-of-the-way corners of the world. Charley Case about his father and had his re holding their sides when he off. The bill is opened by Great Libby with a good bicycle Kenly and Lafferty, as bell- hop and chambermald, do eccentric dancing and wind up with an aston- iaht adow trick. “IT was just wondering,” sald the witness, “whether or not a true fact argues the existence of an un- true fact; and, to carry the idea a \ttle further, what might be the precise shade of difference between | a true fact and an untrue falsehood ; or, on the other hand, if there is any real distinction between an untrue fact and a true falsehood. Sometimes, I apprehend, analogy is less convincing than disaimilitude. The introduction of a starting con- trast may enable the mind to grasp the salient points of’— “You can take the witness,’ gasped the lawyer, waving his hand feebly at the attorney for the other side.—Chicago Tribune. Now that loan sharks every- where are being driven out of busl- ness, there's nothing left for a man to do but borrow from his friends. “He certainly great credit.” “Does he love her?” “Well, he's getting it, isn't he? “Does he love her? Didn't he He hasn't pald his grocers bIM for|march with her in the suffragette #ix months.” parade,” PATIENT RESIGNATION “Did your husband get the right kind of a suffrage plank in the platform?” “Well, he did as well as I expected You know TI never could de pend on John when I sent him to town on an errand,” TIMES HAVE CHANGED “L want to speak to you as one. the plain people.” “Don't do it,” replied Farmer a Fatossel. “You want go rei that times have changed and a prosperous agriculturist looks on self ag somebody rather special.”——-Washington Star. WHY, AT RENO, OF COURSE , “In our country, where can one really find the cream of society?” asked Miss Blase, “in Reno, of course, where society goes through the separator,” replied the cynic acridly—Judge’s Librayy. DIFFERENT Daughter—Since !t is your wish, dear parents, that I should marry the rich old brewer, I consent, altho he is seventy years old, Mother—But he is only sixty. Daughter—Sixty! Tell him to ask me again in ten years.—Mbj gendorter Blaotter. ef fe deserving of Ne Won't somebody please page Mr. Joseph W, Bailey! “Won't you walk into my parlor?” | Said the spider to the fly; “For it fs the contest parlor That ever you did apy.” Which used to make us shed real tears of pity, but now moves to chortling gurgle in realization of the fact that the wicked old spider was really the original health of- floer. Hank Appleton was called as & witness to impeach the testimony of another man, Hank was asked if ho was acquainted with the repw tation of the witness for truth and veracity, Hank guessed perhaps he was, Ia it good or baat” Woll,” teetified Hank, “I don't want to do the man any injustice, but if the folks ‘round ‘bout here saw him looking as if he waa dead, we would want some corroboratin’ evidence before we buried him.” Wherever the Travilia boys so, “Winks,” the sea lion, wants to go, too, “Winks” comical cuss and acts a good 4 like a humorous dog that hasn't any tail to war. Yesterday the Travilla boys, who, are headlining at the Empress theatre thie week, left the theatre by the stage door and went south on Becond avenue for 4 stroll, And “Winks” went foppity flop after them. He stopped at oft drink joint Second av where many matinee girls and ob-dearme boys hang out, and, his acute smell tell ing him there was water within, ho ambled through the door on “Thie ts house cleanin’ week at ” for “hey.” '"—St, Paul Die | en Becieyeport Houses, an’ ali th’ beds are bein’ sprayed with bor deaux mixture.” ing for cover Winks” barked coup ot timer—“Ooft Oof!*-—and climbed a stool, An obdearme boy had left a partly-consumed Banana Spe cial on the counter. “Winks” nib. bled it, curled his Mpa in scorn, and demolished what was left of the confection with a careless flirt of his Mapp By this time the Travilla boys missed “Winks,” and when Jack whistled the sea Hon Mopped obedi ently t the door He stopped on the way BOY STIFF ‘ves “WINKS” AND ONE OF THE Business of squeals and scurry. | ms” aa and tried to climb through the cashier's window. The cashier, ac customed to the gentle advances of the oh-dearme boys, didn’t relish |being ogled by a sea lion, so she lelimbed the roll-top desk, showing ja little bit of ankle und a great deal of agitation in the ascent. Jack coaxed “Winks” away from the window with a plece of dried |fish. When you are sea lion you SE EEFSEDETDS OBE AT THE EMPRESS * * RRR ERE Ee Cheekers Von Hampton and Hazel Jonselyn are about as clever a team ever graced the boards at t Empress. They treated. their hear. ers to an exhibition of good clesn singing and dancing Joe Cook is a most satisfactory black face comedian. His stunt of a drop with all sorts of surprises on it made a decided bit The Leap Year Girls” ts a good lexample of how a joke may be | worked into a clever little skit. It furnished a fine antidote for care Lowe & Edwards wield their litte lelubs on the xylophone to great ef fect Back” | HOW WINKS, SEA LION, SCARED AN “OH-DEAR-ME” AND ATE HIS BANANA SPECIAL TRAVILLA BOYS IN THEIR TANK {do not hesitate when asked to de lelde between dried fish and fraig | | sundae. q | The Travilia boye—Jack, Forg and Gu; ‘¢ natives of the lina islands, and “Winks” from the same place. Their tank act ie distinctly novel ‘clever. All four are fine swims but the star member of the ty lis undoubtedly “Winks Preece errr AT THE PANTAGES * * SOREN RE The headliners at Pantages are the Bard Brothers in feats strength and daring. Their act good. Eldon, with the assistance | two other impersonates the mous magicians, Herman, Thi and Kell As the last he m fles his audience by suspendit a woman horizontally in the air. Morati Opera Company contributes selections from the operas, The voices are fine, especially the so prane. Julia Woleott and Percy Challenger in the “Fourth Floor and Billy Broad ty of humor for the bfll. " No, what happened to Mac? Mac died and went to Heaven. Had a good time but was kind of lonesome not seeing any of his friends, Peter says :— “What's the matter Mac? you're looking kind of dumpish.” What did Mac say? Mac said:— “Unbar that big golden door. I’m going back to get a chew of CLIMAX ‘heGrand old Chew” _ meee Oo Se