The Seattle Star Newspaper, May 31, 1911, Page 4

STAR THE SEATTLE “Hats Off to the 13th Century We « Perdhan we . lations u “ na kt useage is T ju turtes oO ’ ay bas % the © f Aw ee «Bt . ‘ and a . B like | ther “Ours matter of | n welfar w 13th . : , Max ‘ere guarar } SAB S85 fll b in mor y larg dinary »s 4 n the world has se worke AR “ All tha : ‘ po living unk r ac te er ca " n, we will keep rig and res E go ‘em on = & | ‘= 7D) S$ 3 cy at, and chan Because most other sea that the veg do you expla Bernhard Bernard Shaw Hersche! Parke ESR at emer nee lst of nonar Rejane, and F the Marie Core of Columb eler Wilcox rn ittenden of Yale i, fm the United States E a These are only a healthy and famous it be at least buman life Countess pton Si and Ser few out nd Go a p n that animal fi Score Another--Fourth Inning When Democratic Majority came to bat in the fourth Inning, New| Mexico was « rst. Recall Arizona on third, with two down. Signal} was-given by Capt. Champ Clark to work squeeze play Majority’} gent an easy one down to font Marty Littleton, who made a fum Ble; and then threw the t eman Mann's head Into the Bleachers. Recall Arizons The score now stands ee ae ee ae ee Democratic He aes 3 Republican Sena ooo0e8 Observations HIST! Somebody has dynamited a Los Angeles butcher, and the} Police suspect one of his customers! eo oe o OKLAHOMA GRAIN DEALERS’ ASSOCIATION met and cussed | feciprocity up hill and down. Now let's hear from the Cold Storage } Dealers’ association am 3 ° o ° | ; CLARENCE PATRICK, Oklahoma telegraph operator, has broken fast with an orange. me poor overworked operators have | : es a 4-day : to do it with a peanut. ee CONQUEST of meningitis is thus summarize fecovered. The disease formerly killed every Whieh it attacked; now more than half recover ee aie ROOT decries “experimenting with the constitution” in the mat ter of direct election of senators. Oh! Let's return to old Chauncey Depew! He bad more beauty and just as much brains vee a AT RENO the police, coroner and undertaker had pronounced a man dead when he sat up and asked for a glass of beer. They hadn't thought of offering him a glass of beer to discover if he was dead, 6 6 GREAT howl for more American scenes in the moving pictures. Bure! Let's have a picture of Lorimer weeping over having been born @ poor boy and having $100,000 spent for him without his knowing it! *Twould be American and moving. ot baby un er one year et aa. “DEAR EDITOR: Why will editors publish su that Mrs. Collis P. Huntington is about to sal! for Beatrice fi." Read the item through, Mesdame gee that Mrs. H. lenves after an operation for appendicitis. What Seciety in this country needs is more vermiforms, and that Mrs. H @eesn't take hers with her makes the item a jim dandy. See? i eee” NEW way of solving labor problems over on the Malay peninsula Most of the men employed in the mines are Chinese. Chinese do not Mhe to stay on the job long, so the contractors had to devise something to keep them. They knew that the Chinese like to gamble, so they @arted gambling games, bringing thousands of dollars to the govern foolish items as uro Mesdame Beatrice, and you'll ment. One-tenth of all the profits go to the house. The final result] fs that the Chinese, sooner or later, lose all their money. Then they | have to s and work. White Cross Dental Co. INTRODUCTORY OFFER FOR 30 DAYS ONLY Gold and Porcelain Crowns...............$3.50 ret, hse: shia - $3.50 BE kia cece vi seeses $5.00 to $12.00 PAINLESS EXTRACTION FREE ALL OTHER WORK AT PROPORTIONATELY LOW PRICES Painless Methods Free . Expert Examina- Cree tion iis Work Guaran- teed Cheapest Prices nder 12 years of age. a vices of our experts FREE [ between 8 and 6 p. m, Mondays Cor. Second and Yesier eee eee eee eee eee Health and Fame Without Meat | jplan is Over Guy's Drug Store Room 207, Right of Stairs Buy or MEWHAT DIFFERENT eee eee eee eee THE ADVANTAGE A MUSICAL or NATURE ® What's the eee Rustic Diplomacy th morning The Humorist—Ob owed It! And where,” demanded his wife would you be now but for me? man midnight DISCOURAGED. glanced at the clock He smiled. The Vanquished—Humph! 1 guess I'll haf to give up de Idea dat “« I'm skinny an’ redheaded an’ got fre es dat I'm another Bob Fitzsimmons’ DIFFERENT POSITIONS. “What does the man do over there at the desk who seems to be working so hard? “He checks the cash.” “And what does the ma do who is leaning back in the easy ehair smoking’ “Oh, be cashes the checks Bal timore American. OUR DAILY TABLOID CARTOON While the Saturday growing, housewife? When half-holiday why overlook the does she get a |half holiday? The Worst Nightmare. Mrs. Dillingham—Doctor, | dream every night that I'm out auto riding. Doctor—Isn't that all right? Mrs. Dillingham—Yes; but | also dream that Mrs. Munn is out in a machine that cost twice as much as mine.—Pittsburg Post. A MATTER OF YEARS. Frost—What's the difference be tween a debutante and a guffra wette? Snow—About twenty years. Woman's Home Companion Gassaway—There's one mistakes. Garland—What a fund - of in- formation you must have,—Boston | Transcript. thing —————=|about me, I always learn from my|sent her an umbrella for a birth STAR THE Sit aes Duck Cable srr ne How Reactionaries Who Were Re tired by the People Have Been Given Soft Places P r b b t t Taft ts cha ° NELSON W. ALDRICH, Well. known to fam whe an nonnc Wo years ago his Intention to © to priva’ fo, seeing the certainty t he w jated by people 1 in connect fed with public payroll as chatr man of the 1 tary nator at @ salary of $7,500 « year, with a generous allowance f secretar he to draw any mor » carry on be the propaganda ‘or of the so lealied Aldrich m y plan i SHOCKING! The Lady—Gracl earth shall I do? He comin’ an’ my garter’s b What on ‘ man 1 DETECTED, father do when you ask questions What does your ; Small boy | He generally says, lemon; ““Faent when igo out of thé WOULDN'T Do. } Visitor—An@ you always did your daring rob’ single handed? Why didn’t you have alnuri pal? Prisoner Well, sir, 1 wuz afraid |he might turn out to be dishonest Toledo Blade. FEEeeeeeeeeeeees: Ik THE TIRED STORK |*% Willle—What's bein’ an or |® phan? }* Tommy (who never knew his | parents)—I guess it's when the |® stork drops yc |* to the bh |* Boston T before he gets he's goin’ to. anscript eee EEE EES eee ee A SHORT STORY. “My new novel is a story of mar tied life,” said Scribbler “Boll it down,” admonished the | publisher. “Married life is a short story nowadays Philadelphia Record HOORAY FOR THE BIG HATS. “Mary, is there a single good thing about these great wide hats that women are wearing?” “Yes, John, there is. When two each | |women meet they can’t k |other now."—London Opinion. A SHAME TO SEPARATE THEM. she's going to give ring. Edith——What would make her do anything so foolish as that? Eleanor—Oh, just her abnormal sensitiveness and suspicion. Jack him back his |day present, and Ethel half believes that he meant it as an insinuation that she doesn't know enough to come in out of the rain, eine WEDNESDAY I'm busy now; don't bother me Do you think one of our host's! daughters would suit you as a wife? | “No, I don't think it would be fair to separate them from each other."—Fillegende Blatter THE FOOLISH GIRL. Edith—te Ethel still engaged to Jack? Bleanor—-Yes, but I'm afraid MAY 31, 1911 | | | * ® stra une to my mothe * . u pan’ ‘ w * ® the i « for « * ® fare * * w * . * * Ugh, the Old Brute. The Young One—What do you e ru t time for a man to marry? | The Old One—When he has noth ng else to worry bim.—Answers Materially Speaking. t—That as > statue in he drawing room Host—Yes, it's a fine piece of work “What's it made out of, bronze or »pper 1 made that oat of cotton.”"— Smart Set Magazine A DESCRIPTION “Pathe: said the small boy, what is a muckraker? A muckraker, my son, fe a man who 5 agar the sa politic about each other on the ans i stow to sit three Doggone a hoas dat has down an atch fleas every minutes.” T’ asked one * replied the room, he looks in the encyclopedia.” Method. Her Husband—My dear, how did you happen to employ such a pretty gir? His Wife—1 didn’t happen to do it, | did it because | wanted the children to have police protection when they are out in the park or on the street.—Silent Partner. melodrama, “The is to be revived. thriller White This is which contains that the famous line “Rags are royal raiment when worn for virtue’s sake.” The Impressionist. “Wonderful, marvelous! And what does your picture represent?” “Oh, as to that, opinions are di vided. Journal Amusant ONE OF THE RARE BOOKS. The Preacher—Where }going, Uncle Eben? fussed up! Uncle Eben are you You're all Going down to New York. Coming back with some thing that will surprise you too. The Preacher—What's that? Uncle Eben—Got « or from a fellow down there offering me a chance to buy an autograph copy of the Bible for $25.—Puck. The Treatment Helped Some. “Let me kiss those tears away,” he begged tenderly. She fell into his arms and he was busy for the next few minutes. And yet the tears flowed on, “Can nothing, stop asked, breathlessly. “No,” she murmured, “it feyer, you know, the treatment. them?” he is hay But go on with Silent Partner, EVERGREENS DONE BROWN | platform.” | JUST TO SHOW WHO’S BOSS, THIS JUDGE SENTENCES HIMSELF TO QUIT SMOKING ir 4 contributed dally a few ' “ sliver to help the tobacr truet make a livieg, and ha@ « i ee h habit for me ye of clear Havana cigars 4 4 hour onld you once ¢ hb year t about and aay } Bee here now thi smok nel habit in gotting too strong. 1 guess i) quit for about six weet And could you then quit? And could you relegate the weed so peremptorily li » temporary oblivion year In and © out Seems like a mighty tough job, |you may Wel ha ) what | Judge Jobn F. Main does. He han ja the cigar habit ke tough When ige ace od of being ] prejudiced as he was in the Wap Penstein case, it I mach easier to Itranafer the case to anothe® judge th emphatically that he fenc cing preju ui want And Judge Main does not | courage } “It T had a foe fi that I could e tt That was h y a way me © He was 1 to practice law iu 189 He ca ff cases by their pages in the law y are to be found ver legal points is a case in the yn that he tx not] xraduated from in i891, f and was super. | in Iitnots, his | w years, before he commer tudy of law r | dj aw ~~ I cr RE ah iM T ie 0\ F you are not yet a depositor in this bank, allow us to point out a few reasons why you should consider becoming one. We offer a standard of service second to that of of no other bank in the entire Pacific Northwest. You are served promptly and efficiently. We make you feel at home—treat you courteously and try to be of assistance to you, no matter what volume of business you may transact. We appreciate your business. 4% 4% INTEREST PAID ON SAVINGS ik nd onee self to abs ter As long an ot ateoen Gilet 2 he “ | bench, it wi orm ite duty with-jother day could not but be con nut regard to consequences to any | vinced of thelr sinc The court mag, not excepting elf.” | room was in a hilke silence These wo: ay Appear trite from |when they were spoken the mouths « rists. Those} Off the bench, Judge Main ts a who heard Judge Main say them the| mild, modest person. He seems FOR A TERM OF SIX WEEKS EVERY YEAR JUDGE JOHN F. MAIN. he but he n who is master he must be, for entences him m smoking for a and gentle re like a imself. And ch year he of six weeks. Hi WA ih ie HHL OHIO CUT-RATE DENTISTS 305 PIKE ST. Over Ow! Drug Company. Entrance Room 4. Fillings 38.00 $8.00 Bridgework . $10.00 Sets of Teeth $15.00 Sets of Teeth A 12-YEAR GUARANTEE stands back of the high quality and superior workmanship of all our work—better work is not to be had at any price. Painless Work a Specialty Examinations Free OHIO DENTISTS 305 PIKE ST. Washington Trust and Savings Bank AT THE OLD PIKE PLACE HERE FOODS AKE CHEAPER; FRESHER, TOO Public Seales in Market Office Delivery 10 Cent Suburbs 20 Cents. Delivery Extended to Green Lake, Fremont and University Districts. Manning’s Coffee Store 1519 PIKE PLACE, —AT THE— ANGELES CAFE Latest Moving Pictures New Every Day FREE REGULAR DINNER Served from 11 a. m. to 8 p, m., including coffee, tea, milk, beer or wine, 25c Vocal and Instrumental Music Afternoons and Evenings, Why Cook at Home? at 921 First M882, Ind. 1688 BLANK BOOKS TRICK & MURRAY Office and Factory 72 Columbia St.