The Seattle Star Newspaper, November 28, 1906, Page 4

No person is allowed to sleep in an apartment situated above that of the king of Slam. The death penalty has been inflicted for that offense, and the last time the king visited Paris there was trou dle at his hote! and some guests had to be turned out. BUquet. : on the other st “Didn't the macaront come from the grocer’s, Jane?” THE SEATTLE STAR—WEDNESDAY, NOV WANTED: A WOMAN she's a perfect Jewel. She two evenings out every Ob, The New Girt. me week A New York woman has written Picead person is allowed to oceupy a higher place than the empresa “Yea, sum, but 2 seat it back.|a book advocating trial marriages of China. When there is a royal procession the house shutters all | mvery one of them stems w Oh, slush! Haao't marriage come down and the upper floors of the houses are deserted. Etiquet. | empty.” enough triale? You can’t even kiss the hand of the sultan of Turkey any more. ™ Once an anarchist, with a large dagger, leaned to kiss the hand of the |#AAAAAAARARA RHA AR AREA RARE AEH tae Turkish ruler, and there was some stabbing that all byt resulted fa |» . . * * ‘The laws of custom seem built on a plan intended to impress | + * with the greatness of the few and the smaliness of the many, and | * » succeed, as we grow wiser, in convincing ws that royalty is often ri- | * _ » @iculous. * * * 4 = —~ ———— . z i REAR AA EEA EEE Le e ° bd By Stuart Maclean . e . : - * “4 eeereerrCT Tee iT See e ee eee eae! * What are the names of history? oo What boots of wild Th ro * Why prate of Athens and of Rome, When we've more famous towns af home? 4 Why thrill at thought of Babylon? » Why write of glories dead and gone? » John D. must take his portmantesa . . By F, Ww. Sch fer . . » And prove his case at Findlay, O. * And shell we think of Waterloo? RERRERRAE AEA REA RARA Hastings anything te you? Or can it be you feel a shock At mention now of Piymeouth Rock? ls dead Phoenecia up to date Can Londen be considered great? These are the names of long ago, Now far excelled by Findlay, O. Ob, beat the drum and ring the belt How Findlay doth the word excell! Let Jamestown’s glories fade away, Let Boston sink in sad decay Let Paris find some other aphere, Let rare Granada disap pear Since John D's got hie second blow Within the walls of Pindiay, 0.1 “Blease reach me der dish of mangles, Ongar.” | +H “You shoult begin mit der neckless clamps, Adolf, nod der rin bs) ya Pickles. Sea food fairst, you know.” “Yeas, dot iss der way mit you. You always see food fairst.” “Shut up und led as begin der commencement of eating.” 2 “I viah some bullyum mit a poached egx in id.” “Do nod be so hastiness. Vait, und eferyding vill came tn due “Oh, I see; vot you don'd order comes in due order, ha, ha, ha!” “Here some watercress.” “Took nod a probationist. Howefer, I vill haf some HAIL, THE GET-RICH-QUICK BEASON, Extra Dry. m the honest husbandman’s yarn “1 am sorrowful, bud der Dry ts extra.” ‘This ts the time of year when stocking is plethoric as a plum pudding with the scads garnered “Well, dere tse von crumb of comfortable—dias bread 168 80 | fom 4 bumper crop, and the get-rich-quick graft is good. It is the in loaf mit 14.” onder, id wass raised in der Yeast End, ha, ha, ba! to you some cabbage?” ; I don’d schmoke.” “Listen to dot! You haf no table manicures vatefer.” “Don'd forget I am still vatiing to reception a piece 3 May Af of der , blease?” “Der lizard, ef you vill be so gootness.” Bud better you taking der rubberold.” Vieh iss iat” Now voult you mind passing mo der ; I see von in der dressing.” “How carelessness! Throw id away. Oh, here comes der cake und other deserters.” “Dot reminds me. Why {ss a geeseberry ple sour?” “Becoss id ise crasty.” “Someboty tolt you. Heafens, dere iss no cheese.” “Neter mind, we vill skipper.” “Now, who vill tip der vaiter?” “] vill, Blay ‘Bundle Boy’ to yin—he will come in under & Goppel w ha, ha, ha!” “Here comes der finger bowls. are nod punch bowls.” “All rr-rigd, bud vot do you do mit dem?” “You vesh your fingers in dem.” “Oh! (a pause.) Der fool forgot der soap!” THUD! dey Blease remembrance dot FRISCO ARCHITECTS FOR A-Y-P. EXPO. grounds In company with Chair man ©. J, Smith, chairman of the committee this afternoon. No deal has as yot been closed, but it ts understood that they will be ap pointed official architects of the exposition. STYLISH CLOTE big prices. Elliott 1329 Second av. John G. Howard and J. J. Gallo way, two San Franciseo architects, arrived in the city last night and are today in consultation with the pullding and grounds committee of the Alaska-Yukon-Pactfie expovl Gon. Th took a trip to the PIANOS Steinway «:. Knabe , without the & McGregor, ‘eee FINEST LINE, HONEST METHODS. EVERYTHING MUSICAL. Sherman Clay & Co. ONE PRICE, 1406 Second Ave. Seattle, Wash. POee ee CCPC CCPC E Eee e ee) eee * * eee eeE * Home's not what {t used to be, Everything’s so different, since Mother simply smiles, and says Henrletta has less clothes Mother says to be content Even Ellen, when she had Finished with her books today, Went to mother, and remarke Calmly, and don't you think the slaughter open season for opulent Obedia! tan't appalling ‘he game had to be stalked In {ta feeding grounds In former days U some miles back from the railroad, but now it has been educated to and eat out of the hand come right up to the lair of the 520-percenters that alips it the crisp, green treasury stook worth almost what it cost to print. Time was when the grafter, in the guise of @ lightning rod rod agent or a non-explosive lamp wick vender, laboriously footed tt across country, Later he lurked ncross the street from the Grand Central station with a verdigriestained gold brick tn the skirt of his Prince Albert, waiting for the rumbling ruralite, Now he has to do ia to hang out his shingle and advertise fluently and have the money brought right to him. ‘And it always comes. He has to have, in fact, a force of abont 150 high salaried, show girl stenographers to help him write letters of thankful acknowledgment for donations from the alfalfa amateur in margins who seeks the old oaken bucket shop, or the corn-fed connoisseur in over-night mining shares. Lured on by the invitation to make prosperity a stepping stone to take a lot of it away from somebody else, the well fixed farmer sheds yellowbacks until every office building looks littered up like a poultry run in moulting time. For a brief while the mark thinks he is crowding BH. Harriman out of the security market By strict devotion to the Herculean task before him, the. wise guy can clean up in time to catch the season at Palm DRAch Wt tts height, which will be some months before the postoffice authorities usually get busy. As for the come-on, he will not go to Palm Beach. MOTHER'S STARTED- PLAYING BRIDGE ' BY STUART MACLEAN SE OPAL STEREO CEN I don’t dare to talk at meals, Bit there ike a heathen mummy; Mother's apt to frown, and say “Please remember you dummy,” aes es ees Word sounds like a sacrilege; Mother started playing bridge. are Sister Julla’s new young man Home's not what it used to be, Word sounds like sacrilege; Everything's gone crazy since Mother started playing bridge! California Winters Are ideal. Come into the sunshine and enjoy Its many attractions for the pleasure and health pecker. The Southern Pacific company is oper- ating two traine daily by the ple- Sees the parlor, and departs; “Julia, why not make it hearts?” Even, than the old Madonnas; Oftentimes with simple honors, “Partner, may 1 pls | | } } THE SEATTLE STAR BY STAR PUBLISHING CO 1307 and 1309 Seventh Ave. EVERY AFTERNOON EXCEPT SUNDAY § i AR D X } Telephones Editorial; Independent 575; Sunset Main 1050, “ sn” Busine Independent 1198; Sunset, Main 1050, @ By “JO “ome sake FIRST PRIZE FOR BEST CONTRIBUTION, $2; SFCOND PRIZE, 61. b errives, I vow - SEND IN YOUR YARNS. MAKE ‘EM BRIEF, AND ADDRESS atte xton, a8 second-class matter “JO8H WISE,” THE STAR. Abusing the Bachelors y Rockefeller Jr 4 the A Word From goon Wiem of bis onda achool ¢ they ought to be thankful Dr. Ht h, of Chicago, ts rather hard on the bachelor Ta a te th have to rege tes 2 Cont address he said statement There™ always a “The or is a coward and a moral leper | - lot o content on A »wardice charge, there may be hing tn tt, “Now t tik business-—the = aero th’ market an’ you Dut the brave ve the fate And on this prima facia showing |?4"'* kin buy ft cheap. the bachelor ts found to be greatly lacking fn the virtue of moral Sarah Bernhardt ta broke, 8a bravery rah‘s great financial mistake was in But aa to being a moral loper—that's different Neeau a }n ot be a member of t ginal bachelor refuses or neglects to be a benedict it d st follow | Mloredora sextet necessarily that he is corrupt as to morals, It would be almost as mes high, but I must get logical to conclude that because a woman does not choose to marry From the revised say oo she is a moral pervert Tom Platt An April Foot Joke Th jor haa enough to a er for. Little Willie, believing tho first sete ongsap ttn. relia odaa 2 rage , Too Much for Them of April a fine opportunity to play He ts selfish, That ts plain. He has every chance in the world Tho Australian mode of holding] a joke on his mother, came rushing to make some good woman happy and he makes the plea of avold: |the election was tried the first] into the kitchen, greatly excited ance. Ho loves himself too well. He deliberately and with matice |time in Whitwell, The result was/*Mamma! mamma! there is a| aforethought chooses his solitary way a very light vote, as the voters 41d | strange man in the cellar who haa/ n a - . not very tand the mark} Nellie (the maid) on his lap, and The suggestion that the bachelor pay added taxes because of bI9 Jing of | Sap vanek fotlinenes ter nh che timel” refusal to bear his legitimate share of society's burdens ls a good Mr. nor” for governor; @m| “You st say aol 1 must stop one, He should be heavily mulet for his delinquency other for the old “hoss,” and still] it at om With these words the But he ought not be abused simply because he is a bachelor. another mo ney one on the — lady rushed to the dove oe » are s » true » cons rig | SOme would not vote at all ney | Willie ran after her, laughing from are too many of him te quite true, Tho census tells | 47! "Not like the idea of being sent! the depth of his heart are seven million unmarried men In this country into a stall to prepare their bailots.| “fold on, mame 1 wanted to] helor must be labored with. He cannot be turned from | One man sald he had lived 56 years! send you on a fool's errand K's} the error of his ways by calling him names. You may say of him and had never seen anything like} no strange man, its only | = before and ed 0 kno ce » BLLAC . that he is neglectful of his duty and he will not resent ft, that before and wanted 0 know CROLL, BLILOT who was responsible for the change. - But you cannot drive the stubborn brute. Whitwell Correspondent, Sequa Daughter—Mother, do canaries chee (Tenn.) News oat fish? - Mothor—No dear, Why? Etiquet for the Great The Standard Ol company will] Daughter—I heard pa say he was try to get an immunity bath. In| going to get a pereh for our bird ee thia case it wants the bath #o it! today, . * KR? won't be cleaned _ Btiquet fs a sort of sont thing, after all, ivn’t it? Most of It ts hi) Mrs. Citygirl Newly wed—Dridget, founded on the idea that God molded some kinds of clay better than It ts sald that Emperor William | send that chicken back I fimd it He did the others, and that a king is not made of the same kind of | punched the retiring minister of) hasn't a tooth in its head. I may be mud as a commoner. agriculture. Poastbly emperor| new at housekeeping, but I am not Gace King Alfonso fell down astaira. Ho was 12 then. He stood |¥8* oaly giving him another deco-/ going to bo gene ne baby thon here! ou oan tell the batel a fine chance of breaking his royal neck, but a servant threw out his |"*°" Bar but oo goeney hands and caught the little fellow. Now, it is Spanish etiquet that “Did you ever get any free ad NELLIE CONNORS. the person of the king is sacred and that no servant may dare touch | vice from a lawyo ~ him. The servant was dismissed from his position “Yea, many a time, but T've no] “How do you like your new tleed he was always the lawyer] cook? TO SPEND $100,000" ys SCRANTON, Pa. Nov, 9f.—All, fatled. Mina Welch had attended a that Miss Helena Welch needa to|seminary in Philadeiphia and ts to If she wants $1 0 In to o well ated. here and get it, Ite watting for her ’ We her uncle, waa a But if she docan't show up within wealthy liquor dealer of Decatur six month ammount 1 He was a ower and childless. given tal in I r, When be died a year ago, there was . the terms of her ¢ to inherit his vast fortune ex- uncle's wi ept Helena Welch and her brother Put Misa Welch cannot be located, William, It was Gteoovered that Five years ago she left for William was dead, but no trace |with a man nh 4 Mause, very 1 be found of Helena ffort to find ef of them has| The Intter is 30 years of age. TROP PCR OPC CCE UC PPP eee Se See eee ls * * * » * . = * * * . * RTP PCCP CCCP PPP eee eee eee eee es BY STUART MACLEAN, A madcap young maiden named Mee Drank the wh of a very large wine glass; With a shriek and a rue She sat down on her cha And sprained hersctf right in the f Our dear Hite sweet Marguerite Had the biggest and funniest Baratogs trunks; And she WOULD take the trai Though ‘twas perfectly evident They'd never go under the hat boxes. A sweet child, by name of Lucinda, and it hurt her Slipped on the & To their grea She declined to get up Till her mother had come Milly sat looking disconsolately out upon the chimney tops “T never med 1 could owe #0 much mone he groaned. “T guess I owe afl there is in the world-—$1,500! Here I'm engaged to Ellen, and the old gentieman writes be will give mo $5,000 the day we are married, and | shall be dead of starvation or in fall, one or the other, long before that. And Ellen’s gone to the country, and Gh, hang it!” “Morsing, Mr Billy? cried Mra Ames, a pretty little womkn who lived in the next room, her army husband having been sent to some particularly tnhospitable country "Why, you look real comfortable and miserable.” Whereupon Billy told ber all about ft, adding that his father bad written him he w confined to home with the gout. “Bo he's sure to be in bad he mor,” he added. “Nonsense,” laughed Mra, Amos “It you had that $5,000 you could pay all your debits and have money over, couldn't you? Listent She was opening the door to go out “You are already married—married this morning. ‘Think it over,” and she was gone Did he dare? He must. It seemed reasonable. ls father could not come to the city. He would risk it “Dear Father,” he wrote. “Cir cumstances in my wife's family Made It necestary, 50 we were mar tied this morning, and leave for our honeymoon tomorrow, Please send check, Billy.” Then he sat down and thought ft over. Next morning Mra. Ames heard on awful crash in Billy's room, ane ran to see what was the matter “Here!” he gasped. “Telegram: fathre better—coming up to see wife -filien in country!” He rushed t the window. “Father here now HIS WIFE FOR FIVE MINUTES own and fixed everything Ames, Getting out of carriage! Mri you have got to be my wife! “1 couldn't!” she exclaim “You've got to!” insisted Billy, and as he spoke, bis father entered Mra. Ames badn't been kissed so thoroughly for years. The old gen tleman bubbled with joy over bis son's acquisition. “What made you marry so quick be demanded Now, father,” blurted Billy, “we haven't a minute. Rum, dear, and get ready for the train. One mo- mont—I'll go with you. Excuse me a moment, father?” and Billy leaped after Mra. Ames to Induce her to keep It up. No sooner had they gone out of the room before a gentleman en tered, In army dress, “Looking for my wife,” he said, pleasantly. “LAttle surprise for ber oh, I beg your pardon?” This to 4 very pretty girl who was standing im the hall, a pussied look on her face. “I am looking for Billy Blake,” she said “That's my son,” sald the old gentleman “We are engaged,” said the girl, approaching him confidently. Engaged! Bless my soul;—Why Billy's There came a sound of volces approaching, and aa inspira tion dawned on Mr. Biake. “Here— behind the door, both of you,” he ordered, and they hid themselves »vediently, as Billy returned with bis rather unwilling bride, It was an astonishing tableau that greeted Billy a moment later, when he saw Ellen returned to the city, und a rather upset officer who alled himeelf Captain Ames, so, as there was nothing else to do, he ned up. “What a boy!” cried Mr. Blake. Wear Brooks’ Hata, 1331 Secon: CJ avenue. oe AMUSEMENTS. LOIS THEATER Great Prod “MAY BLO Special Thanksgiving Matinee Thu inee 1:30, evening 7:30, Performa Tonight, James O'Neill tn MONTE and Night, Wednesday Matinee Prices—-$1.60 to 2. snd Saturday Ma y in THE ILLUSION Prices—$1.60 to 2hc. Beats now Toes 30 STAR MATING ES BACH DAY AT Bow CONTINUOUS SHOW O Cook and Mims Roth Engtts and Ida Kelly, Sadie Roi weig, J Great Film. WONDERLAND EXHIBIT 1909 FLYER T All this week, an exciting trip o See the Races. Baby Incubator in Third Avenue The ” RUE & DREW (Reopened Tonight and U “PECK'S “Rig Comedy Hit." Call for Se Any Time All Day. Next week—Z Performanene-2 #0. PHONES— Sunset, Main 1204; Ind, 4334, uction of 880M.” raday Afternoon. Doora open, mat- nee begins, Matinee 2:15, evening JOUN CORT, Manager, Both Phones 4%. CRISTO. “The Voice of the Mighty.” tinee, OF BEATRICE, welling. $A Matinees, 100, . commencing November 29, 100, fay tie's Leading Vaudeville Mousa. ANKSGIVING, ss Chas, McDonald, Sam Hddie Roesch and a Reat N TH h comiques ules Marron; 906 Second Avenue. PRN DAILY WROM $A. M. TO tt P. OURING CAR. n the New York Central Raliroad, Ann New Arrival Yesterday, “TUE MOST POPULAR THEATER" Managers. Phones 667. ntil Further Notice.) BAD BOY" ats After 5 o'clock. Order by Phe inn's Musical Travesty Company. TAYLOR'S CASTLE GARDEN uresque Shasta ro axcelte Father's mad because she's made eter ct ene pesutle al come it ery, Revervations and tekete at| anna RuThone OF Street. Op Fourth best of your strongest) seattle, Wash, EB. E. Ellis, General) 150 people on stage, Reserve you walt.” Agent on 100, 25 tbe ond 81. e your ens Saturday Evening, Dec. 1 ND CHILDREN s FAIRYLAND, ELLA, and all the Taylor Favorites, seats How, Phono, Ind, 3405. Prices: | } | | | gle Mills t f0 th t ' Washiegtan Thursday ¥ , gles rhe t . Massage Creama p f | for 7 f Be whing 1 ; Florent ne Massage Create ahing 1 1 for d aie Fauitiess Massage Cups 904 pe eleg Wel Fos M,. GAITO GAYS JAPAN NOW ! Har prleg 3 ist FEELG A BIT UNFRIENDLY ‘the o M. Salt f ir a ia at the fF nd his way to Japar { - world trip = unfriendly f | and he sald he regretted the Amer: | . jean attitude. j GOVERNMENT REPORT ON STATE'S CONDITION WATCH OUR WINDOWS, Royal 8. Kellogg, of the United States department of agriculture, | ses left Beattie ye rday fc Washing | the lumber and conditions of this| at Mr, Kellogg has been on the} 1013-1015 First Ave, r st for the past three me s pre ? paring @ report on the conditions re j existing in the west re | [ | BRADY 16 NO BETTER. 0 —— a w. ¢ of the ty how BR stated * afternoon that! we em Brady, whe shot and killed | rr ed to commit sulcide Nov, 8.| ere’s still time to buy, P r k the nee B. P. 0. E. MEMORIAL. i : i } oe ions made, and if the - The annua! memorial services of y cash is not the B. P.O are to held tn} i beatae at hand - li be glad to open an ap. | “wot, we'll forgive you, oh |tain Ames? Billy, he you spend of it runt for ' 'WASHINGTON THE SHINGLE STATE Extra Specials for | the Virst Presbyterian church, cor | ner Fourth « nd Spring st. nex count with you f what. Sunday, De at 3 k pm ever . vi | Rev. W. D. Simonds will conduct ver you need, the services. Looking Ahead Everyone should look Into the fu- | ture far enough to make prepara- tion for their own welfare and pro- vide a small savings account for the Mf need which aire as well State Bank of Seattle pays 4 per cent interest, compounded semi-an- svally on all savings deposited with them. One dollar will make a start for you which will never be re Pianos Good Ones We sell better Pianos and sell them for less money than any other deal- er of organization. We will sell you the same grade, style and qual- We've a splendid show f the season's novelties Men's and Women great quanti of new goods have arrived since flood situation cleared and are now plated. i A comparison of yles and prices is im P our guarantee satisfaction stands every garment sold by gal “ in Garments Eastern Company, Ine. 1332-34 Second Avenue Near Union, “Seattle's Reliable Credit House.” ity instrument from one- third to one-fourth less than you can buy else- where. That's why we sell over half of all the Pianos sold on the Coast. D. §. Johnston Co. Biggest, Busiest, Best. 903 SECOND AVENUE. We could not after day that we entire line of cloaks, waists, silk skirts, and muslin underwear at) half price, and in many cases at} @ positive loss, if it were the truth. .The public can't bey footed all the oe if genuine “get article the entire stock the YORK STORE, 1112 Second h We will be closed aif Thankegiving, but Friday they following unmat 7 await the woman with @ to save. Prices Talk Louder Than Words SUITS. beautiful Diack blouse Sult, very mer price $50, NOW, .+v9+ A few regular wo Suits left; your cholee.. A still better grade, days sold at $27.60; now SKIRTS. Stout ladies will have m0 in either paying for ot fitted in one of our black panama Skirts; price was $1 Here’s Proof Seattle's Leading Specialist, 40 Year's Experience. A September Bi, 1808 Beattio, Wash De. Clarke Co, De aeibly you may have forgotten me, ut I have mot forgotten you. for the me in Im proved nt I would not ood you did me. for your success, Gratefully yours, $1.00 for the vith best wishes remain, PETTICOATS. ‘This letter, and hundreds of of vo ses on tae th oe Clee ke ae $10 guaranteed taffeta sitk Pett: flounce, tomorrow «+++ them. coats. 3 PCure Rupture pp nv... occe-crr oatl » ait: emmmntanty mined tweed. at onecbalf the of sical operation or pain, And without. intertering with "you work or bustness. yee? NO CURB—NO PAT. Conwulta tte Bxamination Free HOURS> ; 4 dao am. ee price. FURS. Tt you can afford $10, $40, 860, $100 or $150 put half your money fen for Xmas gifts, and vile the New York Store tomocey: with the other half, for price of furs In the house goes half. New York Store 1112 Second Ave Opposite Garvey- Buchanan bod NOTICE TO SU Ed | ‘othe DR. CLARKE CO, 123 Second Ave. So., Cor. Wash- ington St, Seattle, W. LLOYD TRANSFER CO. Ino. Baggage Expre Furniture and Heavy Hauling. Both Phones—1686, Office in Ditler Hotel, Open Day and Night, | tail Should yor -opy of The Star | co eth you by 6 ofelogk any Gy ling, please do us the SAV0E “iis PANTS TO ORDER Jup our main office, Bum vee tpn OoLEN Independennd we wil Sat cow : copy at once. If you sbealt LAS ss it more than oned please iy ILLS. | phone us every time you misain ot 1020-Ist AVE n thin way we can SUITS To orora $15.00 ving ~~, Pye = wy