The San Francisco Call. Newspaper, December 24, 1905, Page 5

N FRANCISCO SUNDAY CALL right by the 8. 8. M I did save the general's life— “lure Co.) saved it twice. Just let me tell you fhi!u was pa—a perfect EVELYN Oh, my poor pa: Do you MAGRUDER. four pleces = JARNE e gate posts and Edward done Sir a bunch of iv toothpicks that opened ry child; who like & little fan, and a knife. A knife gray-headed iy two good blades and a corkscrew under guard; I never was so astonished little fiitter-head ‘““Thank you,” I said. “I'll do you & tavor some day.” He smiled at me again “A mouse saved a lion's life, very dignified He dropped his notes at he Aid not deceive 1 said, oner of the on the porch floor to dry. I pressed ok houlder to see him write. It was my and I certainiy had a right Can you read it, little rebpl?” he asked quissically; for he was not a bit in any hurry sir,” I answered; “but I expec Paul can He wrote awful bad Just then a scheme flew my head to send one of r men Paul, for f pa. Pau says s fair in love and war.’ v Bln e Nl e T brhugik & e water to y the general, and he 1t and sald W & grea ea F s reading ““That i fine. so m ks myself Pa pped the emptly gourd on purpose, ei ells me the tales and picked up a note along with it > R I flew to find Paul, who was down . 5 ling schemes ogmg takes might & ke s 3 - I was scratching eggs out of k e the gu s flew at him i I he s: I watched the g sir & . Y watched the ster u an't tell them apar £ ang and pulle s air He R sirmed round and j which . " . o it short and exac his. We » 4 and rolled and - scrambled tli . €g was smashed. 1 could IS not wd oitld not boss me. e for the very same s & age i < en we sat up and glared. 1 tore my . “® " handkerchief and threw him half to mop tee% his 1 and ip my skint w = wris es k ¥ watck Paul,” 1 said, “1 am perfectly ashamed ¥ should trample f ourselves. T this good pa fghting that might n a Yankee Virgi sne “you are not such a great fighter. You can make a = fellow's nose bleed at’s about ail s What's the matter h my fiying a s ted the big general’s nose then, while you ked sple his back fifth rib? said Paul haught- enemy in the back 3 good, kin feit o » - have mea gy saic are yle. You , ¥ along the Prince of s ds k of Whales and 1 Richard Cure . ol = en 1 said eag The job of rescu- 1 0. like a b 2 knc we me wit gels e a P hing every w away, lef aise 8 s You nearl shack ; ou tied my achirg t pa s * string and an apple t ¥ made the old sow But when I showed p ves glowed like s Stopewall this. , he’ll come. 1 know he'll come g s ys s0. He is here to-day and there g row; swift as a we shuttle ke He n the old Furnace road now on the s w ak & ne Dan know - wer t. Don't s ‘ Ik find out thir ! « Ao t is peifectly splendid. You RPN e dispatck ell General k ! m & 1 ard are full of S Yanke A c je i W 11d 1 1 Jackson you € we O say , and Mine Carte 1 He made me N very owskin shoe: 11 meet you » w HEN the old philosopher ad- . se mitted that he to explain all tions and st ¢ 8 of a man with he con- a con gnorance that ve brou e blush of shame heek of in good pis- (etanding like Ex Cai- (man w with- {out findir to such a ring 1 }«’m.mfi problem m been fied . . in assuming that d more or e . {less in vain. Of c e are n y (men, and approximately many ids, e {and they all have differe ways, but in s ul called them. “Van- {the last analysis they all proceed on_ the eels.” Or, better still, | funcamental princip It is with the gold-hilted sword and with ) pious l’n\s-m.uu l:yr pr .ullx.g.:,.\ rge A juantity of expert knowledge before the woss i {world in ral and part arly before {the aforesaid old philosopher enent the t my ways of men with maids that we proceed and 1{to tell what happened to Alphonse and Marie. Marie was a coy maid and exceedingly tr-r-aitor: “Per-r-risk (hard to keep in sight of. For more yearg than it would be polite or to mention she had had a number of caliow youths for suppose I frightened the gene upset his ink, and cussed bottle me and ate be Paul I ran and got our trailing around after her, Alphonse being nad made out of elderberries and oak (among these traflers. It was not that It wrote lovely, but was very |Marie was fickle or that she didn't know | galls. sticky ‘Sht‘r own mind. The man who thinks that 55 2 S a woman doesn't know her own mind-is The general thanked me like any other (o o 0q or a vast amount of high-class person, and had such a kind, sweet smile 3.‘“0",,“, ol B I was glad I had not killed him. The settled principle by which Marie He rummaged his pocket and gqve me \regulated her conduct was that men value any article that is held too cheaply. Therefore she proposed to give a long chase to the man who presumed to entice her into the matrimonial corral. Furthermore, she argued, matrimony is an uncertain condition, especially since the South Dakota divorage have hegun to lose caste with the Supreme Cout. Liberty is sweet, especially after you have , and Marie didn’t hanker to deprive herself of any of the sweets of freedom until she could make a contract that would guarantee her all the rights never i #hat she had enjoyed under the previous administration. For this reason she kept poor Alphonse sitting on the edge of the anxjous seat, thinking that thereby she could induce in him a chastened frame of mind and a due appreciation of the extent and importance of his achieve- ments when he should at last enter into matrimony. The course that she gave him was cal- culated to frighten a less determined man out of the field. Theater twice a week, with the proper accompaniments of American Beauty roses, cabs and suppers after the play, automobie rides in the vark on Sunday afternoons, innumerabic A MATRIMONIAL TRAGEDY. “You can't get any pass, Virginia. They don’t give passes to girls.” “Just look at you now. Always ob- jecting. I'll get the pass from my dear, kind general. You go saddle Firefly and wait for me at the Mine Pit. Then I flew like a flash, indeed. There was the sentry, there was pa. “Lean your head down, my poor pa,” T said, T hugged him tight and bade him heer up”’ and “never despair’ and only trust in me and Paul and the Heavenly Father. Then I ran up the long stairs and threw off my gray homespun dress and red flannel petticoat in a little pile on the floor and hurried into Paul's other suit. We had swapped clothes so often, just for fun, to fool people, I felt as easy in his as my own, and pa was the only one who could always tell us apart. 1 crept down the back stairs, got out Tt AL i 'u';ah" EE 2 7 Byr UL B2 T PP YK | Zoeviey zp27 S50 =22 she was to continue in her condition of singularity indefinitely or was to send out a flag of truce and invite Alphonss into the camp (v discuss terms of peace. Since all but him bad fled. she mu novels of the latest pattern and boxes of chocolate ad libitum were part of the reglmen to which Alphonse was subjected by the evanescent Marie. Lest it be supposed that Alphonse was lacking in some of the qualities of true make the best terms possible and capid- manhood, it should be stated that he was ulate with the honors of war. When something more than four years old and the case s stated to Alphonse in diplomatic language no particular men- tion was made of the causes that hal inspired Merie to her determir but he was lowed to believe th superior charms had at last that he thought he knew a few things about the game himself. He was content to wait on the bench becaus: he was rea- sonably sure that in the course of time and feminine events he would come to By Nicholas Nemo. B the bat himself. breash in the walls of the fair one's One morning Marle awakened and heart, and that all he had to do was looked in her glass, as was her custom, to march'in avd take possession. FEut Alphonse had Leen around a little him- seif, and some of the things that had struck terror to' the heart of Marie were not lost vpon him. He knew tha: he was a sort of Hobson's choice, but ke alsc kunew that that fact relieved him of some of his obligations in ti matter. In the next act the wedding bells had ceased ringing, and Alphouse and Marie had settled down to the quiet joys of domestic life—at least Marie had. ‘Alphense, howevers seemed to be hy way of beginning the day. To her horror and surprise, she could detect symptoms of wrinkles, and even a hint or two of a gray hair. Clearly something would have to be done, and done quickly, or all would be lost. Gray hairs are a algn of honor and hard work in a man, but in a woman, especially in one who is still clinging to the family tree, they are an indication of wasted opportunities or ot an inability to detect the occasion as it flew. - _ It was up to Marie to Jdecide whether through the apple cellar window and went round to my general. He was leaning against the porch pillar, looking very grand and noble, busy talking I swung up on the low porch touched his arm. I was in sucha h no time for swapping knives. “Pleage, sir, let me have the skins at Hazel Spring, where the beeves are killed 1 asked. They were the very words Paul had 'said to Colonel Car- ter. v s many nt on ta as you ng. “Yes, sonny and w 1 jogged him again ‘Please , glmme a He wrote on a plece of paper and handed it to me. He was such a splen- did, good general, I was ever 1 had not slain him As 1 made my way tow pass, or th shoot me gladder ready to do everything but settle down The he nights that he wasn't at his club vent to sleep in his chair before 9 afdd when he was awake he was unable to findl any more cheerful subject of conversation that the size of the last month's bills for millinery and dressmaker's sanplies and the advan- Tages of a single life as compared with his present condiiion. He never seemed to fnd to take bis wife out in his automobile any more, aithough it W rumorecd that Dotty Highball of th Thirtv-four Jolly Maids Company was not unacanainted with the number and speed capacity of his machine. Roses and chocelates vever found their way now to Marie, and when she remon- strated with himn on the subject he re- miinded ber that she had had her innings some time previous. All in all. Marie was forced to tha conclusion that whatever matrimony might be in the abstract her experiencs with it in the concrete did not Incline her to think that she would respon with great alacrity to an encore if the chance over came her way. As it is now. Alphonse spencs most of his time he- tween his office and his club. and Marie sits at home and wonders why mar- riage works such wonderful changes in men. The inportant fact which she overlooked in her plan of campaign was that the harder a man runs to catch train the less inclined he is to active exercise afterward. Copyright, 1903, by Albert Britt. soldiers halted me, called me “Johnny™ and “Reb,” and by the time I reached the spring I had showed my pass three times. The fat Dutchman in charge of the beeves said, “Dat vash all vreet! I watched the man for a while. Presewiy I sfipped awey and dodged about im the bushes till I was clean out of sight. Then I fairly cut for the old Pit Paul was waiting. He had gone & roUwe about way by the dry ravine and over our h. Firefly was rubdis alder and was very We were hoth pale and began to realise somebody might get hu So many ene- mies Jurked around w 1 not care at all who ther shot. My heart heat with great my side, and Pau bumps agamet blouse fluttered gray like a bird was in his bosom. I handed him the pass “Oh, Paul,” T said 'does your courage hold—do yon dare 3 “It does, I do, I do, Virginia. I'll never n back!” He clasped his hands and ked noble and solemn *“If the wc comes to the worst, Vir- ginia,” he sald, trying heer me, will join poor ma and the ange “Paul, I sald, “would ou rather go enjoy here?” He answered gorter slow enough for angels is plenty yourself with ma or scuffle {t out *What is good good enough for me, but I don’t see how you and pa could get on very well without me, Vir- ginia.” een us, and we round ome another's that plece we lil well apon the land And How can Than facl “What a little f sald, noticing it all at on in hat a little, small Virginia.” me to ba hurrying )a would get into I told Paul. “Be s to cateh cold,™ and we ki Then he « up in the little saddle pa had mac m CF ngs, and I sat on the st atched him and Firefly trotting away thro e pines and dogwood bushes, realized he was just a little b hat was the last [ saw of Paul for a g. long time. very ki as ands in my m know I "he fat German eyed me I came back I pockets and w was a boy I was terribly that pass agat He pointed to a bl id he would ecall for he did not ide and sald, leetle poy!" “Dere ish your skin And—oh-h was the skin of my own little Spotty helfer I burst ¢ rying, “You are a thief! I'll report yvou! Il tell the general. Oh! my dear calf I raised myself It does hurt anybody so awful to kill thelr helfer they raised themselves. I drew her it aws over my shoulder and dr! her skin sadly along. I could not stop erying about Spotty, haltway home, in the edge and dragged her g without being bothe of the thickets th a puff of smoke, and my le stung and dropped the skin, and I began to hurt all sver I had on Paul's coonskin cap and some- body must have taken me for a varmint When I got near the house I felt very curlous. I walked gorter onesided A soldler came to meet me and pulled me along roughly “You pitiful “Come and repo up as a boy, are Just as I expected. No sooner was my back turned than poor pa got in trouble With his back against the bell-pear tres stood pa, trembly as a ghost, between a& line of soldiers, who stood at 'tention The general was leaning against the white porch pillar and the officers stood near. I do believe they were having & gourt- martial off my poor pa Just then I staggered Into view, for 1 was In great pain Pa exclaimed: “Ohb, Virginia, Virginia, have you come at last?” I clasped my hands to the general and erfed out: “Oh, do not shoot my pal cent as you. I took the note. I am the guilty one—I" 'hen I toppled over and aid not know anything more at all Now I have to tell the tale as pa told it later. The g and sald: “Poor little rebei! Poor littls kid!" At that moment a rifle ball tore a haole through the pillar where the general's head rested the instant defore. He ex- claimed: “My God! The kid has saved my lifer” More bullets came flying out from the thickets; then a volley. Pa sald it was pandemonium let loose. The rebel yell reverberated through the thickets. “Yi-yi-yeli-yl! Yi-yee-i-ii!"" and all in a moment, like a swarm of bees, there were thousands of gray jackets. Our premises were cleared of the enemy in a twinkling. The peach orchard, in full bloem that morning, had not a blos- som left the next day. The trees were stripped of their branches by shot and shell. Pa says “the battle was fought glor- jously and we wou the fletd.” My pass did not do Paul a bit of good. said sed rascal!™ y! Dn ittle He 1» inno~ Shoot me. al stooped down to lift me e ————~~Before he had gone a mile a soldier { haltea him, but Firefly did not step quick enough. Poor Firefly always would manage Paul, and so she was shot and rolled on him. He was mashed some, but the soldier did not bother him when he saw what a small chap Paul was. So Paul limped along till he met one of -Jackson's scouts and he carried him to Jackson. And Paul gave him the note and told him what I told him to tell him about our porch and yard full of Yankees. Paul stayed in the camp#hospital till he got patched up and they sent him home. They praised him up. too. But nobody praised me at all. They said I came within the ace of spades of being the death of both pa and Paul with meddlesomeness, gave me any horse or any- thing, except my dear, kind, sweet, good general. How glad I am I saved his life. Saved it twice. First by not killing him with his own pistol and then when I fainted and made him si ‘op over to pick me up, just in time to dedge the minie ball aimed at his head. It's a proud thing to save a feilow be- ing’s life, and Ive got his toothpicks and the knife yet, though both blades are broke. T1he corkscrew is all right.