The San Francisco Call. Newspaper, August 1, 1901, Page 6

THE SAN FRANCISCO CALL, THURSDAY, AUGUST 1, 1901. Che +22Eo< Call. ves.. AUGUST 1, 1901 THURSDAY.....00e000 JOHN D. SPRECKELS, Proprietor. Adéress Al Communications to W. 5. LEAKE, Manager. SMANAGER’S OFFICE. .Telephone Press 204 FUBLICATION OFFICE...Market and Third, S. F. Telephone Press 201. EDITORIAL ROOMS .217 to 221 Stevenson St. Telephone Press 202. Delivered by Carriers, 15 Cents Per Week. ingle Coples, & Cents. Terms by Mail, Inciuding Postager DAILY CALL Gncluding Sunday), one year. DAILY CALL (including Sunday), § months... DAILY -CALL (ncluding Sunday), 3 months. DAILY CALL-By Single Month, EUNDAY CALL, One Year.. WEEKLY CALL, One Year.. All postmasters are authorized to receive (bacription: Bempls coples Will be forwarded when requested. Mafl subscrfbers In orflering change of address should be particuler to give both NEW AND' OLD ADDRESS in order to ineure = prompt and correct compliance With their request. OAKLAND OFFICE...........+..1118 Broadway C. GEORGE KROGNESS. Mavager Yoreign Advertising, Marguetts Buillding, Chisago. (Lorg Distance Telephone “‘Central 2618.”) NEW YORK CORRESPONDENT: C. C. CARLTON......ccvsene=-eee.Herald Square NEW YORK REPRESENTATIVE: STEPHEN B. SMITH........30 Tribune Building NEW YORK NEWS STANDS: Waldorf-Astoria Hotel; A. Brentano, 31 DUnfon Square; Murray Hill Hotel BRANCH OFFICES—S2 Montgomery, eorner of Clay, open untfl 9:30 o'clock. 300 Hayes, open until 9:3 o'clock. 633 McAllister, cpen until 9:30 o'clock. €15 Larkin, open until #:3 o'clock. 1841 Mission, open until 10 c’clock. 2261 Market, corner Sixteenth, open until § o'clock. 1M88 Valencia, open untll § o'clock. 108 Eleventh, cpen untfl § o'clock. NW. corner Twenty-second and Kentucky, open until 9 o'clock. 2200 Fillmore. open until § p. m. AMUSEMENTS. Orpheum—Vandeville. Columbia—*Garrett O"Magh " Alcazar—*The Adventures of Nell Gwynne."™ Grand Overa-house— The Senator.” “The Ensign.” “Rigoletto.” Califcrnia—'“The Case of Rebellious Susan.” Olvmpia, corner Mason and FEddy streets—Specialties. Chutes, Zoo and Theater—Vaudeville every afternoon and evening. Fischer's—Vaudeville. Recreation Park—Bascball. Sutro Baths—Swimming. AUCTION SALES. By G. H. Umbsen & Co.—Monday, August 12, at 12 o'clock, Real Estate, at 14 Montzomery street. = ———— 10 SUBSCRIBERS LEAYING TOWN FOR 'fHE SUKNER. Call subscribers contemplating s change eof residence during the summer months can have their paper forwarded by mail to their mew @mddresses by notifying The Call Business Office. This paper will alseo be on sale at all summer resorts is represented by a local agent im all towns on the coast. SEA LIONS AND FISH. HE attempt to exterminate the sea lions should T be watched with care. The desire and disposi- tion to exterminate the life that nature placed on the earth should be curbed. The large land ani- mals are rapidly going, and in a few generations will exist only in their remains in museums. Wantonness unconnected even with a desire for gain has destroyed the great sea cow of Alaskan waters, an amphibious animal of such amiability that its capture was not even sport, yet it was hunted to extinction. The same fate is overtaking the walrus. Our sea lions are next in order. They are accused of eating too many fish, and as they will not substitute kelp for fish as food the demand is made for their destruction. When men came here and began keeping tab on their partners in life of the lower orders there were thousands of sea lions where now are hundreds, and there were also millions of fish where now are thou- sands. Of course the sea lions then were eating fish as they do now, but now there is only one sea lion where ten were feeding. Invoking mathematics in behalf of the lions, only one fish is being eaten now where ten used to be copsumed. Where are the nine? Over-fishing by men and not by sea lions is re- sponsible for any shortage in fish. Abuse of the close season, taking fish under size and other violations of the regulgtions designed to protect fish are respon- sible for the decline in the supply. Man is to blame, and he diverts attention by asking a death warrant for the sea lion. We trust that not one of these fine and interesting marine animals will be condemned and shot. That bit of life on the rocks adds interest to the view of the ocean. Those who sail blue water recall how like a desert the far seas are, with scarcely ever a sight of marine life. The coast waters are equally dreary, if no creature intended to inhabit the waters is ever seen. If some vengeful,” greedy and destructive people had their way there would fiot be left a large animal in the water nor on the land, nor a bird in the air, and man would Jord it over a2 world that he had stripped of its living things other than himself. San Francisco is quite interested in preserving among her objects of interest the herd of sea lions which have so long inhabited the group of rocks which lie within her borders. There are many things she could better spare. e e e New Jersey trainmen have been of late nightly spellbound in terror by the apparition of a ghostly figure which flits on the wings of the wind before their train. All of which goes to show that New Jer- sey trainmen should change their brand of liquor. The Secretary of the Treasury has decided that six cigarettes are worth one cigar. He would think that they are worth comparatively a great deal more if he were to investigate the death record of the large cities of the country. Since some scientists have informed the people of the East that they are to have four more hot summers in succession, those who are wise enough to profit by the teachings of science will move to California at once. A New York girl is asking $5000 damages from a fellow who borrowed $400 from her and then jilted her. She seems to be laboring under the impression that she should be paid for having escaped a desperate fate. For one reason or another the Buffalo Exposition has not made much of a sensation, but now that there has been 2 mysterious murder on the midway the Buf- falpnians have high hopes. Pnper{ in the Mississippi Valley have begun to re- fer to the hot waPe as a “sizzard.” THE STRIKES AND TRADE. HE trade of San Francisco has been adversely T affected by the strikes, which began with the machinists’ walkout on May 20. Human in- genuity has not devised any better way to keep the capital of the country in circulation than by the pay- ment of good wages to labor. The entire stock of money in this country is paid to labor about three times over every year. There be those who de- cry the wage system, but they have never suggested anything in its place which will equally serve the pur- pose of keeping money flowing. As it flows it reaches every part of the industrial system of the country and builds them all up, and flows on, just as the blood carries the bone and tissue building material with it for even distribution as it circulates through the body. The quantity is not reduced by the process, nor its potency for construction. But impede the circulation and construction ceases and growth stops. The circulation of currency has been impeded by the strike, and there is atrophy of trade. The wage- workers affected are not earning and they are not spending. If they are maintaining their families as well as before it is by the use of credit with the re- tailer, who, if the situation continue, must go to the wall, thereby affecting the credit of the wholesaler and of the banks. It is apparent, then, that the strike has in it the germ of a credit panic, and if prolonged sufficiently will reverse the prosperous conditions of the country and bring on hard times. It is not for- gotten that the panic of 1893 was preceded by the stubborn strikes of 1802. . In view of the important consequences that may come out of these strikes one is impressed by the issue of such harmful results out of the causes al- leged in many cases. Selecting at random from many of the statements made, it is surprising the number- of cases in which men assure their employers of con- tentment with wages and hours, and declare they struck because they were told ta do so. In other cases men were not aware of a grievance until they were informed of it by some expert in that line. Looking over the mass of reasons, and of crimina- tions and recriminations, and considering the means used to secure demands, and above all looking at the loss of a summer’s wages to labor and a summer’s profits to business and the risk of a panic, the impres- sion is clear that these struggles are largely avoid- able by equalizing the legal responsibilities of the par- ties. The employer is always under the restraint of responsibility to the law. The law implies against him a contract for the protection of his employes; it dictates the sanitary conditions under which they work and such conditions as affect their safety; it gives a superior lien for their wages, and turn where he may- the employer reads “Thou shalt,” and “Thou shalt not,” written in the law for his restraint. His property is hostage for all contracts, express and im- plied, and must respond to the last penny. The labor situation requires him to enter the con- tractual relation with labor unions and their business agents. These contracts, or agreements, vitally affect his business. They may put it entirely out of his power to defend himself against loss and bankruptcy by the transfer of vital objects of interest beyond his control, putting them in the hands of those to whom they are not important. But whatever they are they are legally enforceable only against him; he cannot enforce them against the other party to them, for that party is incorporeal—it has neither legal body nor estate. When capital comprehended the power of organi- zation and the partnership by evolution became the joint stock company and that the corporation, it was soon seen that the corporation, having perpetual suc- cession and legal immortality, was a vast power for harm and oppression unless its legal responsibility were made equal to its power. Corporations are still criticized, and continue to deserve it, but the vast body of the law of corporations is testimony to the wisdom of man in curbing the power of organization. As a corporation was a representative of human self- ishness organized to avoid individual responsibility, the law first made it an artificial person, to sue and be sued, thereby enforcing its responsibility. Upon this artificial personality is built an elaborate system of law’ for the benefit and protection of the public. The issue of assignable shares of corporate stock, the liability of stockholders, the protection of their rights as trustors against the corporation as trustee, the limitatipn of corporation ownership by public control, corporate liability to employes, all testify to the prudence and caution and intelligence of man in curbing the harmful and preserving the useful power of organization. If when the fruit is ripe and the market ready for it _every transportation corporation in this State should arbitrarily refuse to handle fruit in California because there existed a dispute over the coke rates in Pennsylvania, every fruit-grower would have cause of action against the defaulting corporations and a recovery of value down to the last box lost, unless the corporations could show physical inability, from causes over which they had no control. If one cor- poration, in addition to refusing itself to handle fruit, should by unlawful violence prevent another corpora- tion which was willing to handle it, the offending di- rectors, managers and agents would be summarily cast in jail and subjected to the most serious penal- ties. If the Southern Pacific not only refused to haul fruit out of the San*Joaquin Valfey, but tore up the Santa Fe tracks to prevent that road from performing the service, the State would inflict exemplary punish- ment on the corporation. If one steamboat corpora- tion on our rivers refused to handle perishable products and dynamited rival boats that were per- forming that service, and lives were lost, somebody would be legally hanged. We will not assume the obtuseness of our readers by stating an analogy, phy- sical and legal, which occurs to any one familiar with current events. Corporations* were curbed by law so as to pre- serve their usefulness and minimize their harmfulgess. Whatever organization has the power to inflict the same harm and the will to use it must be legally curbed in the same way, or the community will cease to tolerate it. In our complex society there is no room for power not regulated by law nor responsible for its acts and contracts. em———rm —— Lord Pauncefote’s declaration that he hopes to bring back from London an isthmian canal treaty that will satisfy the Senate is very good summer- weather talking, but we will see later on what kind of a fall he is going to get out of Lodge and Morgan. A 135-year-old girl of New York took an aged man a few months to experiment with in married life and now she wants a divorce on the ground that the trial was not satisfactory. She ought to be taught a very vigorous lesson in the truth that in some things in life a slip does not mean a trial again. A Connecticut man who the other day looked at. ithe proposed opening of a new street, and, finally, himself in a mirror for the first time in twenty-five years. went out and committed suicide. This seems to indicate that he had very kind and patient neigh- bors who cannot even under the greatest provocation be made to resort to murder. r————— CONDITIONS AT NOME. C OPIES of the Nome News, just received, contain items showing that what was but a mining camp a short time ago has already attained something of the conditions of a well-ordered American community. There is a wide variety in the life there. The papers are by no means confined to mining notes for news, and a considerable portion of their space is given to matters relating to improve- ments of one kind or another. From a report of a meeting of the ‘City Council, for example, it appears action was taken to petition the postmaster to provide a more prompt delivery of mail pouches from incoming steamers; the Fire Chief recbmmende‘d renting a new engine-house with | ample room for the various equipments of the fire service; a committee on schoolhouse was given fur- ther time to make a report; there was a lengthy de- bate on the selection of a site for the city hall; a petition for street planking in the west end of the town brought to light the fact that collections for such purposes were coming in very slowly and city warrants were being sold for 75 cents on the dollar; it also resulted in the passage there and then of a resolution that hereafter the payment of the labor bills for street improvement will have to be guaraa- teed or paid in advance; there was a petition against the secretary of the School Board was authorized to purchase supplies based upon an attendance of 150 children. - That is a very good showing of municipal business for a town of the size of Nome even if it had been | in working order for many a decade, but that is not all. The same copy of the News has the regular American complaint of inefficient street sweeping. The declaration is made that “unless the City Coun- cil takes some action that will enforce the daily sweeping of the newly paved streets, within another month the planking will be covered with from two to four inches of dirt.” Then follows the suggestion, “What is the matter with utilizing the prisoners and making them earn the grub ‘they now eat Mly in jail?” Better news is contained in the announcement that a rural free delivery system has been established in the country adjacent to Nome. That sounds like a very high order of civilization indeed, for there are some very prosperous rural communities even in our oldest States that have not yet,a free mail delivery. The mining news is ¢hcouraging. There is, how- ever, a complaint of a lack of water for sluicing in some of the districts where the placer indications are good. An expert prospector is quoted as saying: “There seems to be gold in greater or less quantity under almost every footprint made in a day’s circuit over the tundra, creeks and foothills around Nome, though even at this season of the year one is obliged to walk for some considerable time without finding enough water to quench his thirst.” Another note announces: ‘“Almost every steamer is landing one or more victims of misplaced confi- dence; people who on the outside were swindled into buying some wildcat Alaska property and coming here to shovel in the promised gold find a bogus lo- | cation notice plastered over some other man’s valid claim.” In connection with that statement there is pertinent interest in the announcement in another column: “This is going to be a poor year for claim- jumpers. The judiciary of the several districts tribu- | tary to Nome has taken its cue from the prevailing public sentiment, and it is safe to say that every such | offender hereafter found guilty will get the full ex- tent of the penalty prescribed by the code.” Taken altogether, with .every allowance made for | drawbacks, Nome appears to be in a flourishing con- dition. On that frozen coast the American people have once more demonstrated their ability to fit up a city in a year's notice with all modern improvements. Nome is no longer a “camp.” It will soon be asking an appropriation from Congress to adapt the port | to the increasing demands of its commerce. T -At Chicago University the co-eds objected to the boys wearing shirt waists, and the boys by way of retaliation have objected to the co-eds wearing short skirts, and thus does that university continue to make itself known as a center of academic discussion. THE DUTY OF REGISTRATION. N Saturday, August 3, registration for the O primary election closes. Citizens who by that i time have not their names on the register will have forfeited their right to vote. Their indifference and neglect will be a virtual support of the bosses and predatory politicians who have carefully regis- tered their gangs and will bring their full force to the polls. We have repeatedly pointed out the classes of citi- zens who must register in order to vote. These in- clude: \ All persons not registered at the last election, but who were entitled thereto. All native citizens who have arrived at age since the last general eleetion. All native citizens not registered who have secured a residence in the State and county since the last general election. All electors who have changed their residence from another county in this State to this county since the last general election, and prior to May 15, 1901 All persons who were registered, but by moving out of their respective districts, or otherwise, have lost their right to vote. It is to be borne in mind that no one will be per- mitted to vote except qualified voters who were reg- istered at the last general election or since that time, and who have continued to reside in their election precincts. Such citizens are entitled to vote without additional registration, but upon all others the duty is incumbent. Primary elections in the past have been dominated by the bosses, so that honest men have had but little chance against the frauds practiced by the gangs; but this year a different condition prevails. The new primary election law assures a fair count of every vote polled. Good citizens have therefore at last an opportunity to eliminate the boss from local politics. The issue should not be neglected by any one who has a patriotic regard for the welfare of the com- munity. Good government is at stake. The duty of the day is to register that you may not lose your right to vote for clean politics and honest men at the primaries. See that you attend to it, and then urge your friends to'do likewise. Two seven-year-old children of Sterling, IIl, were subjected the other day by their parents to a mock marriage, and now the youngsters refuse to take the affair as a joke. Sterling ought to be conveniently located to an asylum for the incarceration of adult idiots. ‘ CAN TALK THROUGH THE SEA BY A WONDERFUL NEW DEVIC]% e ¥ means of an invention recently made known to the public persons on steamships twelve miles apart may coaverse with one another without wires, lights, flags, whistles or foghorns, A 'ship can now be fitted out not only with a voice that will carry twelve miles under the water but also with a pair of ears which will hear and automatically announce messages from the shore or from other ships. The inventor of this marvelous system of sea-signaling is Arthur J. Mundy of Boston, Mass. A great deal of credit is also due to the late Professor Elisha Gray of Chicago, who perfected the electrical part of the apparatus. Signals are made by means of a large bell sunk under water and rung by a hammer that is.connected with an electric wire. The wire runs from the bell to a sort of typewriter keyboard, so that a variety of strokes may be given by the operator. \> e SUBMARINE SIGNALING FROM A LIGHTSHIP, AND A BATTLESHIP ‘WITH THE DEVICE ATTACHMENT TO GIVE WARNING. PIC- TURES FROM PEARSON'S MAGAZINE. e e . ¥ The sound of the bell strokes may be heard by a sailor in the hold of a vessel over a mile distant. By the submersion of a common ear trumpet fastened to a six-foot length of gas pipe the sound can be heard at a distance of three miles. For greater distances Professor Gray devised an electrical receiver and annun- clator, by means of wnich a bell twelve miles away cannot only be heard but | echoed on a large gong in the pilot house. The submerged part of this receiver is shaped like a gigantic ear and will auto- matically hear and announce the ap- proach of othar vessels. Even the click- ing of the machinery of a small tugboat five miles distant will be repeated on the pilot’'s gong. No invention since the building of iron steamships' has been of so much interest as this to those who travel on the sea. The terrible fog, which causes 300 wrecks a year on the English coast alome, has lost its dangers to a vessel equipped with long-distance ears of this self-operating kind. The recent loss of the steamship City of Rio de Janeiro, which went ashore In this harbor, would have been prevented if one of Mr. Mundy's signal bells had been within twelve miles. A loss of more than 100 lives and over a million dollars’ worth of property woula thus have been pre- vented. Mr. Mundy has exhibited his invention to Admiral Higginson, chief of the Na- tional Lighthouse Board, and to Admiral Bradford of the Navy Department. These officials have watehed the experiment with great interest and are considering the adoption of the device on board Amer- ican warships and along the coast line. The inventor has made a proposition to the Government that a signal bell be placed at every ten miles off the coast, every bell to ring a different signal and to be marked on the chart. By this means, in fog or darkness, every ship within twelve miles of the coast could at once tell its location. Professor Gray, just before his death, patented an improvement on the receiver, by means of which the pilot can tell exactly from what direction the signal bell is ringing. The idea of submarine signaling first oc- curred to Mr. Mundy in 1888. While spend- ing his vacation on the Mississippl River he noticed the continual stoppages that the steamer was obliged to make merely to obtain a short message or order from some one on shore. Why not signal under water? He re- membered how, when a boy, he had struck two stones together under water to deafen the other boys who were diving. Then he made experiments with a beil and was so successful that he obtained the assistance of Professor Gray, who was perhaps the best authority in Amer- ica on practical acoustics. For eighteen months they experimentdc at Mr. Mundy’'s home in Cape Ann, M: and finally perfected the present sy:‘lfi of signal bell and receiver. B T o o e e e e e B e e e e St ANSWERS TO QUERIES. NO PREMIUM—W. H. S, City. No| premium is offered for $ pieces coined after 1834 TWO COINS—C. B. O., City. A $3 plece | of 1878 is. not listed as one that commands a premium. As much as 15 cents pre- | mium has been offered for Columbia half- dollars of 1892. SCHOOLS IN THE PHILIPPINES—A. | B. C., City. For information relative to schools in the Philippines and Porto Rico address the recorder of the University of California. OCEANIC COMPANY—E. R., City. The vessels that are owned by the Oceanic Stecamship Company are the Ventura, Si- erra, Sonoma, Australia, Zealandia, Ala- meda and Mariposa. CORRESPONDENCE INSTRUCTION— J. P. T., Oakland, Cal. Correspondence instruction is a private enterprise and this department cannot advertise it. There is claimed for it advantages to those who are unable to devote the time to attend school. ORANGE CULTURE-J. C. G., Pacific Grove, Cal. The writings of the late B.| M. Lelong were published by the State Board of Horticulture. If you will com- | municate with the branch office of the State Board of Horticulture, foot of Clay | treet, San Franeisco, Cal, you can ob- tain g copy of the same. POPULATION BY SEX--P. H. 0. K, City. As soon as the Cens Bureau gives out the population of the States and Territorles by sex this department will | be able to answer your question. ““Will | you please publish the population of Massachusetts, male and female, accord- ing to the latest ce: s | TECHNICAL SCHOOLS—J. C.,~Pacific | Grove, Cal. There are three technical schools in San Francisco—The Cogswell, | Lick Mechanical and the Wilmerding School. As this department does not de- | sire to open a controversy it will not an- swer which of the three is the best in | which to study any particular branch. FERDINAND OF COBURG—M., Han- ford, Cal. Ferdinand of Coburg was elect- ed Prince of Bulgaria by unanimous vote of the Assembly July 7, 1887. He married Marie Louise April 20, 1583. She was the eldest daughter of Duke Robert of Parma. She died January 31, 1899. The issue of that union was Boris, born January 20, 1894; Cyril, November 17, 185, and Euxodie, January 17, 1898. Boris is the Crown Prince of Bulgaria. MINERVA—L. E. D.,"Sonora, Cal. Min- erva, the Goddess of Wisdom, is always represented as being clad in Spartan tu- nic, with a cloak over it and wearing a helmet, beautifully adorned with figures of different animals, the aegls, the round argocolic shield and carrying a lance. Her countenance is beautiful, earnest and thoughtful, and the whole figure majestic. The great seal of the State of California will give you an idea of the dress worn by Minerva. The records do not say if Minerva was a blonde or a brunette. —_————— Cholce candics, Townsend's, Palace Hotel* —_—e————— Cal. glace fruit 50c per Ib at Townsend’s.* —_—————— Special information supplied dally to business houses and public men by the | Press Clipping Bureau (Allen's), 510 bonte gomery street. Telephone Main 1042, ——————— In all big cities there are multitudes of folk who work in the night time. In London fully one hundred thousand in- habitants earn their bread by the sweat of their brows between sunset and sun- rise. < e —— Best Way to the Yosemite. The Santa Fe to Merced an via Merced Fillls, Coultnrvnle.d 1;."':«_: gfg:: Merced Blg Trees, Cascade Falls and Bridal Veil Falls, arriving at Sentinel Hotel at 5 the next afternoon. This is the most popular routs and the rates are the lowest. Ask at 641 Mar- ket st. for particulars and fold Camp Curry, - Yosemite, introduced and maintains the mod- erate rates of $2 per day, $12 per week: less than $40 for an eleven-day trip to Yosemite via the Big Oak Flat route, 630 Market, or Santa Fe route, 641 Market st. * Stops Diarrhcea and Stomach Cramps. Dr. Siegart’s Genulne Imvorted Augostura Rittars PERSONAL MENTION. Senator J. W. Goad of Colusa is at the | Grand. Gustave Frohman, dramatic manager of New York, is at the Grand. I B. Rich, a retired merchant of Bes- ton, is spending a few days at the Pal- ace. Professor S. P. Langley of the Smith- sonian Institution left yesterday for ‘Washington. Charles Sweeney of Spokane, accompa- nied by his wife and family, are spending & few days at the Palace. J. 8. Manley, deputy clerk of the United States District Court, has returned from | his vacation at Menlo Park. Sidney Liebes, the prominent furrier of Post street, returned from a tour of the East yesterday and is at the Palace. Hart H. North, United States Immigra- | tion Commissioner at this port, has re- turned from a vacation at Independence Lake. —_———— Californians in New York. NEW YORK, July 3L—The following | Californians are in New York: From San | Francisco—A. H. Pollard, at Criterion; F. W. Clarke, at Herald Square: O. Lange, at Grand Union; Mrs. A. Martin, at Nor- mandie; A. H. Smythe and wife, at Na- | varre; N. Edwards and wife, at Delavan; | G. H. Plunkett, at Holland; E. H. L. Gregory, at Imperial. From Los Angels— | A. S. Johnson, at Normandie, From Ook- | land—F. T. Barlow, at Cadillac. From ! Fresno—B. T. Shepard Jr., at Imperial. ————— Bats measuring nearly five feet from tip to tip of their wings have been found in a cave near Tanga, in East Africa. H | with his hands, | ers Statesman. A CHANCE TO SMILE. “Here's a distinguished scientist who | says that after all there is nothing in germs.” “Nothing in germs? Nonsense! Why, look how much the doctors have made out of them.”"—Detroit Free Press. The Sultan of Morocco has a $10,500 camera. And there is no doubt that when he says, “Look pleasant, please,” they all do. If they don’t he takes their heads in an- other way.—Plain Dealer. “I had such a disappointment last night!” said Kitty at the breakfast table. “What was it?” they asked her. “I dreamed I was papa,and I was about to have such a good time smoking my pipe, and then I woke up and found I was still Kitty and had to be proper.”— Chicago Tribune. Church—My friend the orator says he's ,working llke a slave. Gotham—That’s funny. A slave works not with his mouth.— Yonkers Statesman. “You ;see, it was this way,” sald the boy. “Pop was warm, and I thought if [ dropped a chunk of ice down his back it | would cool him off.” “And did 1t?" “Gee! No! It made him hotter!"—Yonk- “We have a deaf and dumb member o our Woman's Club,” said Miss Gabbeigh to young Mr. Dugglesby. “Indeed,” gurgled the youth. “I should think she would be at a disadvantage.” * “Oh, my, no. Why, we let her make all the motions.”—Baltimore American. THE FATE OF THE WASHOE SEERESS. Life Story of Mrs. Sandy Bowers. DOWN MOUNT HOOD MOUNT TAMALDP. THE SCIENCE OF DRIVING. By Wa'tzr Morosco. MYSTERY OF THE GUNNISON.