The San Francisco Call. Newspaper, July 20, 1900, Page 6

THE SA FRANCISCO JALL, FRIDAY, JULY 20, 1900, FRIDAY JOHN D. SPRECKELS, Proprietor. Address All Communica MANAGER'S OFFICE CE..Market and Third, PUBLICATION -fl'.’f,,'n.z e 201 EDITORIAL ROOM Teleph Deltverea by Carriers. 15 Cents Per Week. Single Copies, 5 Cenes. Terms by Mail, Including Postage: & AILY CALL (including Sunday), one year. gAIL; CALL (ncluding Eunday), § months. : DAILY CALL dncluding Sus 3 months. - DAILY CALIL—By Bingle Month. = SUNDAY CALIL One Year... 8 WEEKLY CALL One Year.... All postmasters are Sample ccples will be ordering change of address should be NEW AND OLD ADDRESS in order Srrect compliance with their request. in Mall subscribers OAKLAND OFFICE... vevse.+1118 Broadway o GEORGE KROGNESS, ing, Marquette Building, Chicago. e ‘‘Central 261.”) Wanager Foreign Advert (Long Distance Teleph CORRESPONDENT: ..Heraid Square KEW YORK C C. CARLTON NDS ; Great Northern Hotel: Hcuse; Auditorium Hotel NEW YORK NEWES STANDS: Waldort-Astoria Hotel; A. Brentano, 31 Murray Hill Hotel WASHINGTON (D. C.) OFF .Wallington Hote. MORTON E. CRANE, Correspondent. Union Bquare; » %06 Haves, BI A3 DEFICES —527 entl $:30 o'clock unttl 9:3 o'clock. €15 Larkin, open until 1841 Mission, open until 10 o'clock. 2261 Market, k. open McAllister, open until $:30 o'clock 30 c elock 0% Valencia. open Great Ruby.” isiand.” HOW ABOUT CALIFORNIA? vy, in an interview wi 1 to give up hope 1 be taken see evidence taken as b publican walk- Re nd the parasites and bosses are y the walkover for their own benefit ed not merely in party believe in the at any year is a yellow dog vellow dog party. s of Republicans have no- year, since a ¢ activity and organiza- Tarpey, believed for his one believe that all this elaborate ould be provided and set nia hopeless 1 be admonished by the well- shed reputation of California for erratic politics fezity shown last year by the Repub- The party must not respond the Democracy Every inch gained id and added to, ani everything must be done to face a stern independent and a wary and alert opposition. Unless this is y be caught laughing in his sleeve when the vote is counted. znd by the n of San Francisco. widespread prepara spread indifference. ss control must be witl c done, the wily Mr. Tarpey m says he would go to China if he were command of all the allied forces, Lut there is a little Japanese general who prefers to | post himself. The Orientals are teaching 1 in polite zssurance that is assuredly not FIRE IN THE SUGAR PINES. [\ FEW days ago in pointing out the importance / \ of pledging ail legislative candidates this vear the enactmen: next winter of some well de- vised law Jooking toward the preservation of forests, The Call stated that ample object lessons in the form of fires would be forthcoming during the summer to ¢ mind the need of such legis- lat One of those lessons has now blazed out in the sugar pine helt, and from the reports that come to us it appears a very disastrous one indeed A dispatch from Placerville of yesterday in de- scribing the fire states that up to that time it had already destroyed a large acreage of trees and much other property of value. The forests swept by the flames are in the heart of the sugar pine belt and con- tain some of the finest timber in the world. The total amount of the direct loss will be difficult to cal- culate, while that of the indirect loss is absolutely incalculable, since it is going to affect not only the owners of the woods that were burned but the whole community whose trade and industries are in any way connected with the timber interests. After this fire others will come. From week to week, and 2t certain periods perhaps from day to day, during the dry season we shall have to chronicle fire witer fire, sweeping over pastures or forests, in one part of the State or znother. Mountain and valley ike will suffer from the scourge. The total cost to the State of the disasters will exceed the amount which would be imposed upon us by taxation to sup- port a great war. What will the people do about it? We talk of economy, we demand lower taxes, we ask for strictly business methods of managing State :ffaire, and yet we permit a waste of woods in comparison with which the waste by parties is as vothing. To support forest fires we impose upon our atural resources a tax so heavy we can hardly count it up. If we are going o have a businesslike regard tor our prosperity and welfzre, let us begin to exer- cise it this winter to the extent of making at least an earnest attempt to devise 2 good and scientific plan jor the prevention of forest fires. enforce upon the publ f the National Com- | THE PEKING LYNCHINGS. HERE seems little ground for hoping that the TThc details of the slaughter were no doubt ap- palling, and they will lose nothing in the telling to the outside world. We think, however, that a mis- take will be made if the nations attempt to treat these slaughters as the act of the Chinese Government, as 2 national rather than zn individual crime. The mur- ders have evidently been in spite of that Government. Of this the briefest examination will satisfy any can- did mind. Concerned in the government of China are many astute statesmen. They know international law as well as any professor in the Occident. They know the enormity of the official slaughter of a for- eign Minister. They know that when war occurs between two nations cach gives the diplomatic repre- sentative of the other a safe conduct across its fron- | They know that violence to tier to neutral territory the person of a diplomat is violence to the nation that | aceredits him, and if done by authority, as an act of the Government, is the highest form of offense. Now, knowing all these things, it is by no mbans was responsible for these deplorable crimes. were. in effect, lynchings, on a scale greater than our lynchings of foreigners and people of other races in this country. The Chinese Government is obligations to protect the persons of the foreign Min- isters, and its treaty cbligations compel it to protect foreigners who are upon its soil under treaty grant. The Boxer uprising was apparently not against for- | eigners alone, but against the Chinese Government. because it sought to observe and keep its international and treaty obligations. The Government was over- powered, in fact, by a sudden and gigantic rebellion, h we have no doubt received much of its stsength romsthe ill-advised landing of foreign troops, which seemed to the people like an invasion with permanent upation behind it. As that Government was un- | able to discharge its international obligations, it must ! make adequate reparation to the nations whose people { have suffered. So far not Germany, nor Russia, nor any other nation, has cause of war upon China. The | crimes committed are not national crimes. None of | the Governments has any right to demand territory %u< any part of the indemnity which they have the right | to ask. They have the right to demand payment of |n\one,\ indemnity, and such national humiliation as | they choose in the way of granting garrison privi- | leges for defense of the legations in future, but to de- mand territory is quite another thing. Ii China refuse any reparation demanded within ers under international | proper limits, that refusal will be a brazen admission | of Government responsibility for the crimes, ang they | then become an act of war, and China must take ‘what- | ever consequences follow, even to conquest of terri- tory. It is necessary to keep these principles in view, be- cause Germany is showing a disposition to treat what has been done as an act of the Government, and pro- cced at once with war against China. It is probable that her view may be supported by But it is not probable that both will feel able to disjoint from Russia. the United States and England. On Chinese soil there arc 80,000,000 age The assault upon such a nation is a serious under- 1king, and all the Governments concerned, if in concert, may well pause before sounding the tocsin. men of and able to bear arms. There has been a pitiful seli-deception as to China. | The easy victory of Japan is responsible for many things that are among the causes of the existing situ- ation. The Western nations were greedy to take ad- vantage of the weakness which that war seemed to demonstrate. So there rapidly accumulated provoca- tions to be added to what has been growing ever since the Anglo-French looting of Peking forty years {ago. As a matter of fact the war with Japan was carried on, inefficiently, by one province only, and there are hundreds of millions of Chinese who have never heard of it. | They have all heard, however, of the foreign aggres- | sions which followed it, and are simply applying the lessons which have been taught them by other races. | American mobs, for the time being too strong for | this Government, have slaughtered Chinese, have | burned them to death, under circumstances of terrible cruelty, and since we, whose lives are lighted by wis- | dom from on high, have done these things, we should | counsel patience among the nations whose people | have been made the victims of our example. ONE MORE TICKET TO COME. A T the last tally there were ten Presidential tickets in the field, and now we are promised another. The Gold Democrats who sup- ported Palmer and Buckner four years ago have about decided to do the right thing and vote the straight Republican ticket this year, but the anti- imperialists who cannot follow Bryan will, it is said, fill the vacancy by the nomination of an independent, anti-imperial, gold-standard, go-as-you-please ticket, | for the purpose of affording candidates to all persons | who do not like to vote with the crowd. \ In a dispatch from Washington Wednesday it was | stated that ex-Senator Edmunds is expected to take | a leading part in organizing the new movement, but that expectation is in the nature of an air plant, for it has no ground for existence. Edmunds has in an open letter already declared an intention to support | McKinley. It was also stated that efforts are being made to induce ex-President Cleveland to join the but no intimation was given of any intention on his part to do so. Finally it was added: “The main re- liance of the promoters of the independent ticket is the strong Democratic element in New York, New Jersey, Pennsylvania and the New England States, which will not go to Bryan on account of silver and is not prepared to support the Republican ticket on ac- count of imperialism, so called. A similar condition of things exists in Indiana and other parts of the West.” The nomination of the projected ticket would of course add something to the spice of the campaign, for it would be a variety, but the amount added would be so small no one would ever know it was there from the general flavor of the mass. The people are not going to throw away their votes in an election of such importance as this. Sincere opponents of so called “imperialism” will vote for McKinley on the sound and broad ground that it is to the Republican party only intelligent men can look for a wise solu- tion of any of the problems of the country, or for a safe administration of its routine governmental work. Senator Hoar, who stands among the foremost opponents of any plan for the annexation of the Phil- ippines, has well expressed the sentiments of a vast majority of such opponents in his recent letter to Erving Winslow, in the course of which he said: “If you think you can best help the cause of liberty and true Republicanism by voting for the men who are for the free coinage of silver at 16 to 1; by voting for men who are for refusing 10,000,000 American L citizens suffrage at home, for overthrowing the inde- foreigners in Peking have escaped massacre. | likely that official China in any way connived at or They | combination and take an uctive part in launching it, | ipendence of the Supreme Court, and for destroying the safeguards of property and American labor, very | well. Go your way and do your duty as you see it. { I shall do mine as I see it, and I think I can best do it by speaking as a Republican to Republicans; by keeping my right t6 speak as a counselor and asso- ciate of the men who have wrought everything that | has been wrought for liberty in this country since the treaty of peace in 1783, and not as the associate or through the instrumentality of the party or men who have been ranged for sixty years on the side of despotism and oppression, of dishonor and of low wages.” That is the way the issue will appear to the people at large. There are row ten tickets in the field, but only two of them count, and the addition of an- other to the whole number will not alter the fact that it is through one of those two the country is to be governed. He that is not for McKinley is for Bryan. An anti-imperial ticket is no more needed in this campaign that a fifth wheel to a wagon, THE WATER FRONT SCANDALS. E more The Call in the course of its service to the public has exposed a wrong of grave | proportions and prepared the way for apply- ing a remedy and punishing the wrongdoers. The story published yesterday of the manner in which a number of workingmen were induced to pay consid- | erable sums of money in consideration of getting em- ployment under the Harbor Commission brings to { light a fraud whose scandal comes close to persons in | official position, and is of such magnitude as to rea- | der imperative an iimediate investigation by the Grand Jury. | - By the evidence The Call has made public the facts | are established that nine workingmen of the city paid to E. D. Wilbur $50 in cash each, and another paid him $40. In addition to the cash payments each of | the ten gave Wilbur two promissory notes for $: each. The consideration in each and all of the pay- | ments was that Wilbur should obtain for the payer a position and employment under the Harbor Commis- sion. These facts are attested not ‘only by the testi- mony of the men who paid the money, but by docu- mentary evidence. Thus, for example, there was pub- lished among the exhibits in The Call of yesterday a receipt given by Wilbur to Ferren for $40, in which it is expressly stated: *I, the undersigned, agreed to get him a position under the Harbor Commission, and by my failure to do so I will return the said forty dol- lars ($40) to the aforesaid Jno. L. Ferren by August | fifteenth (15), 1899—and it is further agreed that this is strictly confidential up to the date named.” The re- ceipt is signed E. D. Wilbur. In addition to the evidence of the receipts there is | a complete acknowledgment of the whole case by Wilbur in an affidavit, which was also published. In: his affidavit Wilbur makes a clear and full statement. He names the men from whom he received the money, specifies the amount paid by each in cash and the amounts of the promissory notes, and asserts he collected the money from them “with the understand- ing that each one should receive a position upon the water front under the Board of State Harbor Com- missioners, or that the money so collected would be | refunded in case said position was not obtained as ! promised.” | That settles the case so far as Wilbur is concerned, but he had more to say. His affidavit continues: | “I had spoken to one Ed Conroy in regard to placing | some men on the froat, stating that they were willing to put up some money for campaign purposes, and he readily assented on a limited number of carpenters, | to placing these men, on the putting up of $50 each in cash and two notes for $25 each, payable one and two months respectively after their obtaining positions. | I was led to believe at all times that the positions were secure and that there would be no doubt of the truth- fuiness of Conroy's word concerning said positions. As soon as I had collected from ‘each and every one of said persons hereinbefore named, I turned the money so collected immediately over to Mr. Conroy, who gave no receipt and had instructed me to give no receipt to the men for said money collected, though I had given two receipts, one to Mr. Ferren and one to Mr. Woods. Mr. Conroy had put me off in various ways from time to time in placing the men. All sorts of excuses were offered, until I found out he was acting in bad faith. My object in making this affidavit is to vindicate myself, because those who ad- vanced the money to me have demanded either the | money or the position as promised, and as I am in no position to make good either, I desire to have the | burden of this matter rest where it properly belongs.” «; There is the case and the evidence The Call has | { obtained and which it submits to the Grand Jury for investigation. Wilbur admits taking the money in payment for water-front positions, and seeks to vin- dicate himself by asserting that the money was paid | to Conroy, and that Conroy agreed to get the men the positions paid for. It is for the Grand Jury and the courts to decide whether or no Wilbur's charge be | true. Demanding payment from workingmen for posi- tions under the Harbor Commission, even when to the original offense of the sale of such positions there | is added the further wrong of defrauding the pur- | chasers, is not so great an evil as the wholesale loot- | ing of the estates of the dead such as The Call ex- posed in the Chretien case, but it is fully as mean. The one is as black a scandal upon our political sys- tem as the other upon the practices of our probate system. It is therefore the duty of the Grand Jury to enter upon this investigation with a resolution to bring the whole fraud into light with all of its roots and branches, let them reach where they may. It is hardly likely that the ten men involved in this case are the only workers' who have been compelled to pay tribute to spoilsmen for the sake of getting jobs. A comprehensive investigation may bring other wrongs of the kind to light, and if the Grand Jury succeed in exposing the whole ring it will render a service that will be of immense benefit to the com- munity and long memorable in our annals. The telephone monopoly says it will remove its home office to Portland, Or., and take 500 people away from San Francisco. This suggests that the time is opportune for telephone sufferers to petition the di- rectors of the monopoly to include some of its im- pudent “hello girls” among the emigrants. In making an appeal for a reduction of his local assessment J. J. Rauer says he had only 89 cents in the bank on the first Monday of March. Can it be possiblée that Jake has bgen dealing with more than one set of probate pirates? William Jennings Bryan spent a few hours the other day in making a critical inspection of the site of his new home. The inspection, it is needless to say, was made thousands of miles from Washington. The bunko industry appears to have been revived with marked energy in this city. After the bubonic exploit of the Board of Health we may expect the revival of anything in the nature of the atrocious. —— Ww+9HWMWWWHHm. B e IR R S R S ShCE S o S o o o gl o - . @ . PERSONAL MENTION. Ex-Judge S. F. Glel of Salinas Is at the: Occidental. C. W. Wood, a cattle raiser of Los Ba- nos, Is a guest at the Grand. J. C. Fraser, a well-known merchant of | Fresno, Is at the California. J. F. Condon, a merchant of Verde, N. Mex., is a guest of the Grand. B. S. Barney, the wéll-known real estate man, of Hanford, is at the Lick. F. W. May, a noted merchant of New York, is registered at the Palace. T. W. Gray. a prominent raisin man of Fresno, is registered at the Occidental. ‘Wittenberg, a prominent manufac- turer of Portland, Or., is registered at the Grand. James B. Berry, a mining man of Fresno, and his wife are stopping at the Grand. J. B. Miner, proprietor of the Hotel Pfister, Chicago, Ill., is registered at the Grand. L. H. Halsted, prominent in mercantile lines in New York, is a guest of the Palace. C. F. Ainsworth of Phoenix, Ariz., ac- companied by his wife, Is stopping at the Palace. Fy L. Gray, proprietor of the Golden Eagle Hotel at Sacramento, is at the Pal- | ace, accompanied by his family. James McCudden, accompanied by his daughter, fs at the Grand. Mr. McCud- den is a naval contractor of Vailejo. Mrs. H. H. Burton, H. H. Burton Jr. and Miss Violet Burton are in the city from San Diego. They are visiting Mrs. V. D. Evarts, a sister of Mrs. Burton, residing at 1223 Golden Gate avenue. General John B, Frisbie, U. 8. A., re- tired, arrived yesterday from Mexico, where he now makes his home, and is at the Occidental. Mrs. Frisbie and her daughter arrived a few days ago. Gen- eral Frisbie was the first commandant of the Presidio and was a power in his day. Mrs. Frisbie is a daughter of the late Gen- eral Vallejo. fam Parker, the wealthiest native land owner and cattle king in the Hawalian Islands, arrived from the East last night | in company with C. B. Wilson and A. N. Kepoikai, influential citizens of Honolulu. The three gentlemen attended the Na- tional Republican Convention at Phila- delphia as delegates from the new island Territory. They are much pleased with the hearty reception they received and | the cordial manner in which they were treated. Mr. Parker and his friends are registered at the Palace. —_———— CALIFORNIANS IN NEW YORK. NEW YORK, July 19.—J. C. McMillan and 8. D. Rogers of San Francisco are at the Hoffman PROGRAMME OF RACES FOR _ COMBINED COUNTY FAIR Big Purses Are Offered for Trotting, Pacing and Road Events at Tanforan. The trotting and pacing programme for the San Francisco and San Mateo Fair, which will be held at Tanforan Park be- tween September 24 and October 6, has been prepared. It will be as follows: 1, 2:10 class, purse $1000; No. £, No. 15 class, purse $1000° . $1000;' No: 5, 2:30 class, pu 000; No. 6, 2:24 class, pur. ; No. 7, 2 class, purse $1000; No. 8, 2:15 class,. three olds, mile heats, purse $800; No. 9, 2:30 c! . two mile heats, purse $500; No. 10, double team, free-for-all, milé heats, purse $500. -No. 11, free-for-all, purse $1000; No. 12, 2:10 class, purse $1000: No. 13, 2:13 class, purse $1000; No. 14, 2:18 class, purse $1000; No. : purse $1000; No. 16, 2:30 class, purse § Gentlemen's road races—No. 17, road race, mile heats, purse $300, for members of the Golden Gate Driving Club and for horses regu larly used for road purposes, owners to drive. Track horses that have started in races other than driving club events this year are barred. The purse will be divided 80, 30, 10 per cent; entrance, $20. No_ 15—Road race, mile heats, purse $300, frae-for-all; horses owned and used in San Ma- teo County for road driving: owners to drive to road m. Track horses that have started in races other than club events this year are Purse divided 6, 30, 10 per cent; en- trance, §20. ——————— Tt Was No Trust. ‘When Melchoir Marti of this eity died he left an estate, and by his will he be- queathed all to his widow. He expressed a “desire” that upon her death the widow should bequeath one-half of the estate to his relatives. In the Probate Court this clause was regarded as a trust proposi- tion, but the Supreme Court yesterday de- cided that it was not a trust. ——————— Kilpatrick Case. The Board of Education yesterday filed its return to the writ of review granted to E. C. Kilpatrick, principal of the Busi- ness Evening School. A full transcript gt all the records and i f estiga- il was als B e e e L e e 2 ;::é""? >0 | which the estate h: | some time past. | 86000 has been allowed to an attorney for and is another phase of the litigation in as been involved for The plaintiffs pray that the court adjudge and determine the rights and interests of defendants in the real property described; that a sale be made of the property, and that the pro- ceeds after payment of costs and expenses may be divided between plaintiffs and de- fendants according to their respective rights. —_——— THE CHRETIEN CASE. STOCKTON INDEPENDENT. The service of the San Francisco Call in probing the conspiracy to loot estates in probate through attorneys of absent heirs has earned for it the gratitude of the public. The Chretien scandal is a SOITY mess to expose to the public gaze, but such exposures are necessary as long as the bar is cursed with conscienceless byenas hanging around to loot the dead. OAKLAND ENQUIRER. The matter of appointing “‘attorneys for ahsent heirs” should receive a thorough ventilation now that it has been suggested by the Chretien osure. The subject will bear investigation, and if some of the Judges suffer in reputation as a conse- quence they will have only themselves to blame. In” Alameda County as much as absent heirs, even when no one could per- celve that he had rendered service of any value. Qooe0 060060060 es08 :o—wo*—o o+ eoe® $ * 1 ® | : . +PePOPIDE D DD OEDEDIOGDOD @® > . L4 . ¢ . & . - © i . > @*O*O ¢ ¢80 000009 RED CRAPE DRESSING GOWN. The dressing gown represented is of cerise silk craEe. falling straight both in front and back, with the waist barely marked. The sleeves and yoke are of ivory taffetas, embroldered ‘with cerise silk, the draped hood is fastened in front with a bow. ————— SEE YUPS INTERFERE IN HIGHBINDER WAR Police Officers Search Heathens, as They Pass Into Theater and on the Streets. A meeting of the See Yup sqciety was held last night for the purpose cf pre- venting the threatened transfer of the Sacramento highpirder war to this city. Representatives of the Ping Kong tong and the Ong Yicks were present, and after much Farloy gave their promise that the seat of operation would not be changed. The agreement was effected when the See Yup president agreed to contribute $40 to be' uu;d in ;ettl";llr:’g l‘he troubie. n view o e desire of the warrin, - tions to bring the hostilities here, nf-’;to- lice are exerting themselves to prevent bloodshed. Last night Officers Walsh and Horton were stationed at the Chinese The- ater and searched every Chinese as he passed into the place. Other officers held T fcious chzracters on the streets. The police are dc§ rmined to nip this in- cipient trouble in the bud. Two Insolvents. Ira H. Treat, farmer, Anderson, Shasta County, filed a petition in insolvency yes- terday in the United States District Court. His liabilities are $3971 9 and he has no axiand. also PIea a petition: mmiimen: and, a lon; li; 16; no assets, s MO ’ THE SMALL BOY (TO THE LADY)—DON'T BE ALARMED; I'LL PROTECT YOU! - 0060600404000 0000 00800000 0000000000000000000000ss0bebede —Chicago Record. [ R S I R I B e B e e e e e U e R R B BY THE CAMERA ROUTE TO MANILA The first of the Burton Holmes lectur: was given yesterday afternoon at the Co- lumbia Theater, and was much_enjoyed the appreciative audlence. The sub- ject of the afternoon was “Manila,” and the lecture was delivered by Louis Fran- cis Brown, the traveling companion of Burton Holmes. In these days, when the magic camera brings the mountain to Mahomet and the chronomatograph brings all the world in procession before our very armchair, there is no need of submitting to the dis- comforts of traveling. From Vancouver to Japan, from Japan to China, from Hongkong to Manila, from Manila to Balinag, San Fernando, and return, t& personaily conducted travelers were led by the Jecturer, all within two hours time. At Hongkong Admiral Dewey was interviewed and a fine snapshot of him and an excellent moving picture of the Olympia were shown. Consul General Wild- man is also well given. The discomfor of quarantine at Manila were comical pictured, the inconveniences of its hot arrangements amusingly told and illu trated, life in the city—its streets, stores, solitary icecream sc saloon, ances,” carabao car theaters, partment, the iceman, native cock fight— and other interesting features coneisely | and admirably depicted. FASHION HINT FROM PARIS. § ‘ There were pictures, too, of our soidiers convalescents from the hospita in the trenches, barracks and looking out over the miles of sea that separates them from home. The lecturer offered no solution of the Philippine problem, but his lecture was a_renewed testimonial of the importance of the question and of the difficulties sur- rounding its solution, and also of ths bravery and unselfishness of those now bearing the brunt of the burden at the front. Mr. Brown has a clear delivery and pleasant voice and his talk is splen- didly jllustrated. The lecture will be re- peated Sunday evening. LATEST STORIES of the FUNNY MAN. THE ENGINE THE PUFFER. Stubb—What is the advantage of & cigar-shaped train? Penn—Every car will be a smoking car, I guess.—Chicago News. UP IN ARMS. Stubb—They say Elwood was confined to his home last month. Gout again? Penn—No, you see he had to remain home and mind the baby while his wife attended the Mothers' Congress.—Chicago Tribune. = WILD AND WOOLLY SOUVE.\'IR. The train slowed up at the Far West settlement. “‘Here you are, gents,” called the train- boy, as he hurried down the aisle; “five cents an inch.” “Are you selling confectionery?”’ quired the man in the corner. 1 am selling the rope that the gtrung up a greaser with an inch! Get a souvenir, ews. TROUBLE IN TH E‘CARA"AH, It was a hot day and the elephant was thirsty. “I_haven't had anything to drink to- day,” he said, turning to the camel. “1 am told you carry a supply for three or four days. Could you place a few of your concealed water pouches at my_ disposal without too much inconvenience?" “T don't have to carry water for the ele- hant,”” irritably answered the camel, umping himself along still faster. “I am a part of the show.”"—Chicago Tribune. WHY THEY WERE DEAR TO HIM. ‘Yes,” sald the young man with plaid trousers and a big watch chain. “T must confess that I am deficient in musical taste.” ‘‘Perhaps the modern music bores you,"” said the pleasant young woman. “It doés many people, you know.™ _n'l'ves.. don;; |t‘are bl(;:r modern music. ere is one ng about t That 1 like very mucho ¢ the old songs ‘e tact that nobody sings nol ¥y M Stray Stories. - HE RESENTED THE SLURS. The janitor in an American school up his place the other day. When ‘.fi:: what was the trouble, he said* “I'm hon- est. and I won't stand being suspected. [f I find & pencil or handkerchief about the school when I'm sweeping [ hang or put it up. Every little while the teacher, or some one that is teo cowardly to face me. will give me a slur. Why, a little while seen wrote on the . ‘Find the least common multiple.’ Well, T jooked from_cellar to garret for th. multiple. and 1 wouldn't know the thing if T mei it. Last night, in big writing on the blackboard, it said, ‘;‘md the greatest common divisor." ‘Well,' says I to my- self, ‘both of them things are lost now. :Efl _TH be accused of stealing 'em: so I'l in- Cal. glace fruit 50c per ™ at Townsend's." —_——— \ Specfal information supplled dafly - M-h-nnl - Press u sk